DSM Breakup Survival Kit
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NameSuggestion
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CKRhttps://youtu.be/v-iUHlVazKkComments?
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https://youtu.be/sPOuIyEJnbE
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Anna W.About TimeAlways reminds me about the kind of love that's real and really matters
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Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless MindAnytime my heart is broken, I like to a) make myself feel as miserable as possible b) choose the most rom-coms of rom-coms to make myself feel better about life again
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Sleepless in Seattle
All rom coms are a lie at all times. It's these happy ending fantasies that screw us up so in this relationship dept.
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When Harry Met Sally
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You've Got Mail
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Pretty Woman
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Kory H.The Holiday
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Bridget Jones Diary
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Anna R.Sex and the City
Its like having four extra girlfriends you hang out with. / and it's a lie... fantasies don't solve anything. they make them worse.
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Heidi L.Take This Waltz
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High Fidelity
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Elegy
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Lunch Box
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Cairo Time
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Beginners
ridiculous film full of ridiculous people doing ridiuclous things. the actress from French character. please.
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Japanese Story
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Evening
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Ira & Abby
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A Happy Event
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Leigh-Anne Z.
Sex and the City: The Movie
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Ashley A. Take This Waltz
"Life has a gap in it. It just does. You don't go crazy trying to fill it like some lunatic."
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Melissa M.How To Be Single
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Cynthia T.500 Days of Summer
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Sliding Doors
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Jordan G.A single man
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Kill Bill Vol. 1 & 2 (continuously)Sometimes, its just what you needYasssssTotally Agree
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Annie B.The Good Wife
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Iliana G.The Office (US version)These two shows helped me through two break ups. Nothing better than quality comedy tv.
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Parks and Recreation
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Heather C.My Sister's KeeperThis is my go-to CRY IT OUT movie. It's awfully heartbreaking, but gives a good old fashioned release of pent up tears!
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Allie BHow I Met Your MotherI'm actually rewatching it right now - Having an entirely different experience single (Now I'm Robin or Ted instead of Lily) and forgot how hilarious it is.
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Vince R.SwingersI feel like this is the ultimate breakup movie for men. It made me realize I need to spend time with good friends and writing really gives solid advice on how to move on from a relationship that ended. It recently really pulled me out of the post-breakup pit of despair.This is the ultimate break up movie. Period.
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Kim K.SinglesGrunge era stars and music, gritty but hopeful
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Madeline M.Doctor WhoThis sci-fi world really got my mind out of reality for a little while, which really helped me. I connected to quite a few of the characters and I was able to make a lot of internet friends by bonding over the show.
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Madeline M.Something BorrowedIt's your stereotypical chick flick and kind of cheesy, though it never fails to make me cry. But I watched on repeat after one breakup and it helped me realize that my ex (and how he dumped me) could've been worse.
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Madeline M.When Harry Met SallyThis is my all-time favorite movie so I'm always watching it. But it helped cheer up the hopeless romantic in me after a particularly brutal breakup
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Megan W"When Love Arrives" by Sarah Kay and Phil KayeSpoken Word Poetry. Watch it on youtube. I love poetry after a breakup. The moment: "Maybe Love stays. Maybe Love can't. Maybe Love shouldn't. Love arrives exactly when Love is suppose to and Love leaves exactly when Love must." Most powerful words I've ever heard.This is Emma-I agree with this suggestion wholeheartedly.
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Jessica WTed Talks, especially this one: "How being heartbroken was the best thing to ever happen to me" - Emma Gibbs" I was deeply depressed after a break up with someone who was a food and travel-lover and worked deeply in the TV, film, art and music industry. It was like he broke up with me and poisoned the well of all the typical break up go-tos, plus, I couldn't focus on books anymore. I needed some form of entertainment....
So I felt like the only thing left untouched was non-fiction: TED Talks. This Tedx Talk presenter emotionally floored me when she shared "when they don't even love you enough to fight for you". She hit it on the nose... Her hard truths allowed me to be okay with feeling shitty because that's just you have to feel like after a break up. But it also convinced me I would eventually feel okay again.
I've always balked at overt positivity, self-help, do-gooder and live-your-potential type of stuff. So I'd immediately skip any Ted Talk that fell in that camp. Instead, I watched ones by people doing really innovative things that weren't necessarily altruistic. It offered me a space that was both distracting and positive, without being too positive.
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ChristianThe Good WifeVengance by succeeding in life! The best remedy to get over the ex!
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Sarah M. The Last Five YearsIt's truly depressing but is good to wallow in!
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Sarah M. Drinking Buddies"That's the problem with heartbreak, to you it's like an atomic bomb and to the world it's just really cliche, because in the end we all have the same experience."
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Emma JDaydream NationThere's something really satisfying about this movie. It always feels very theraputic to me.
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John Mulaney's The Comeback KidPure comedy gold that doesn't make you feel like shit. Lifesaver.
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Stephanie SNature Programs or DocumentariesI can't watch anything that has to do with any type of relationships.
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Meghan KRupaul's Drag RaceThe best mix of fun, camp, and heart. It's all about being the most fabulous version of you. If you don't love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?'
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Celeste MAguirre, The Wrath of God It's really hard to think about anything else when Klaus Kinski is screaming and spitting on screen at you.+1 forever (ditto anything directed by Herzog. Connecting with weltschmerz via his German philosophising really helps shift perspective.
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Only Lovers Left AliveBecause however eternal, undying your love is, it can't compare to actual vampire love.
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AnonymousThe first two season of Grey's Anatomy
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Vinh T.The Theory of Everything
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La La Land
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Emer S.Parks and RecreationNothing will make you feel like you can get back up again like Leslie Knope's indefatiguable resilience.Galentine's Day. Nuff said.
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Marie A.Coming to AmericaWatch something that never gets old to you and always makes you laugh.
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Julia W.Neon Genesis EvangelionI can't explain it in one sentence, but watching a very dark, very intense anime about teenagers who are forced to fight unearthly demons inside of giant robots really helped me through my post-college breakup.
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Angie M.Any and all CW Shows.Vampire Diaries/Gossip Girl/Hart of Dixie/Dawson's Creek/Felicity. All made for the youths but they're fun! That's what you need!
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Caitlin M.InsecureBrilliant, funny show that depicts imperfect characters + imperfect relationshipsLove that show! Hilarious and real
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Lauren G.Master of NoneYes! love that this is as messy as real life / doesn't aim for a neat ending as.... they don't exist.
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Lauren G.Garden State
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AdinaEvery season of 24Sometimes you just can't watch a love story
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Amanda MStar Wars The Force AwakensHonestly, I am not even that big of a Star Wars fan but I watched this movie two nights in a row once and it made me feel better for some reason. It was probably Carrie Fisher (RIP).
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Julia B.Gilmore GirlsYes!
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Sarah C.FrasierEasily digestible episodes, that I find so so funny, but they also contain kernels of truth about relationships and emotions. And 11 seasons! I could trace my recovery, and by season 7 I was like, I am no where near as bad as I was during season 1.
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Heather CParks and RecreationOr anything light and hilarious and nothing at all heavy - something that gives your sad mind a break and forces you to laugh, depsite yourself.
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Mary HThe Last Five YearsThis was a huge part of getting through my divorce. I first watched this movie only a few months before the divorce, and it was incredibly relatable for me. Plus, it's a musical, so not only could I watch it over and over I could also listen to and sing along with the soundtrack. It became this interesting indicator of how I was doing with the breakup: I started watching and sobbing throughout, or singing along and crying while walking home from the bus or whatever (I had a long period of crying in public a lot...). But as the months went by (it's been almost two years now since the divorce was final) I found myself watching it less and less, or when I did watch or listen the likelyhood of my bursting into tears lessened. I haven't watched it in...I'm not sure how long now, but several months, and the songs come up when I listen to my music on random, but it's more of a nostalgic feeling that I get from it now, rather than a visceral heartbreak type of feeling. Dayana: I strongly second this!
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anne a. amelie.i don't know why, but this movie just makes me better. amelie is such a lovely alone person. she inspires me to be a lovely alone person, too.
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Neha A.Blue Valentine
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Brooke CAn Unmarried Woman1978 ! A wealthy woman from Manhattan's Upper East Side struggles to deal with her new identity and her sexuality after her husband of 16 years leaves her for a younger woman.
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Traci STrue Crime & Home Makeover showsWhen I was crushed &paralyzed with heartbreak about 10 years ago, I found incredible solace in two unlikely places. The first was a show called "Clean House" which sadly is no longer on, but I'm sure you can find something else similar on HGTV, or find it streaming online somewhere. "Clean House" starred Niecy Nash, and, if you can imagine this, it was sort of a fun version of "Hoarders" minus the creepy vermin and rotting food. They'd go into houses overrun with stuff, make the owners get rid of said stuff to sell in a yard sale, and use the proceeds from the sale to fund a makeover of the house. Niecy will give you some of your sass back & just make you feel better. My other odd comfort--more odd than Clean House by a mile, was watching endless shows about true crime: Dateline, 48 Hours, marathon reruns of Forensic Files and the like. I think both of these TV habits, at root, were about watching stories with formulaic, & somewhat predictable outcomes at a time when everything felt lost and out of control. Also, if you watch enough true crime, you realize that most murders seem to take place in Texas or Florida, and 9 times out of 10 the killer ends up being the spouse or significant other--In learning these facts, I told people the silver lining in my breakup was knowing that since I had neither a spouse or boyfriend, that at least I was in a low-risk group for being offed by a loved one. And although it would take a few more long years, my story wound up having an unexpected happy ending: in 2010 I was reunited with the man I'd had to let go those years before, and now, 7 years later,we're still together, living happily in Los Angeles, watching crime shows together!
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Helen S.Frances HaI watched this movie right after my last breakup and it spoke so much to the pain of loss but also to the possibility of new beginnings. Also it's funny and charming and smart. All-around great film
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(500) Days of SummerSuper corny but always gives some perspective. It finds the humour in a breakup which can be so healing.one of the few that shows how you can recover from a breakup.
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Liz DUnder the Tuscan SunIt reminds you that life has so much love and happiness to offer outside of a romantic relationship which is exactly what you need to be reminded of when you feel like your heart's been punched out of your body.
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Binh P.The Break UpIt shows you that sometime the relationship ends, but you will survive, and you will be stronger in the process.Good one, complicated, and not the ending you'd expect
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Bright KellyTruly, Madly, Deeply You'll laugh, cry, and look forward
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ConnieThe InbetweenersEverything goes wrong for this set of British high school boys - makes you feel a little better knowing you're not them!
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Julia z.The First Wives ClubThree women left by their husband s plot revenge and find themselves in the process. Diane Keaton, Goldie Hawn and Bette Midler - come on! Doesn't get better and funnier than this!
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Jeannie G.The FollowingIf you're like me and want super dark twisted things to show you that it could be worse.
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Daneen J.The Joy Luck ClubThis movie makes me cry every. single. time!
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Sunny CPodcasts: Why Oh Why, Dear Sugar, Death Sex & Money (obvs), WTF, Mental Illness Happy Hour, StrangersI love a combination of funny with deep emotional dives. All my suggestions involve listening, which is a helpful strategy when combined with housecleaning, walking, or painting.
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Audiobooks: Heal your life (Louise Hay), Bedwetter (Sarah Silverman), Dress your family in corduroy, Naked, Me talk pretty one day, When you are engulfed in flames (all by David Sedaris)
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Dharma talks: Dharmaseed.org and audiodharma.org both have extensive libraries that apply mindfulness practice to daily living and special issues (e.g., conflict, addiction, etc)
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Garret EBob Ross: The Joy of PaintingJust went through a break up, Bob Ross's calm and positive vibes can really tame any anger or sorrow you may be feeling, even if you're not into painting, his show will give you an overall warmer feeling.And make you laugh out loud :)
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Katie kThe first three Harry Potter movies: lots of engaging action and suspense to keep you occupied, no love interest until the 4th movie.
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Leslie W.FriendsAlways better than what is happening to you, and significantly much more funny.
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Forgetting Sarah Marshall
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Michaela P.Annie HallHe's never been convicted?
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Sierra HShameless
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Dayana M.One Daybecause "whatever happens tomorrow, we'll always have today"
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MurphLove ActuallyMy favorite feel good movie! Neat the way storylines are connected, like many romantic comedies in one. Liam Neeson's is probably my top one, Colin Firth's a close second!
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AnnieUnbreakable Kimmy SchmidtCause females are strong as hell.
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Wes C.How To Lose Weight in 4 Easy Steps (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9mbp0DugfCA)Read it here as well http://aaronbleyaert.tumblr.com/post/109959086957
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Matias P. Parks and RecreationYou will find yourself in at least one of the characters. Chris Treager's depression helped me realize I can come out of mine by sheer will, and seeing a therapist 14 times a week.
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Nat ACrazy Ex-GirlfriendFemale friendships ftw, and depicts stuff that happens in real life very honestly, warts and all. Also, basically a musical with jokes about period sex!
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Nat AGone GirlIf you need to let some hate flow out, and will also remind you why sometimes it isn't great to be in a relationship
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Nat ABojack HorsemanBeautifully nuanced study into depression, mental health, the lies we tell each other and ourselves... in a show about an animated horse. Strange but true!
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Nat ABroad CityThese 2 queens are just hilarious. Their friendship is so uplifting and makes you want to live your best life; regardless of relationship status
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Nat AInside OutOK, OK it is a family film. But science (and the moral) about sadness being important really does ring true.
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