The Role of

Parents in

Athletics

Summary from Bruce E. Brown

Prepared by Coach Theresa Brummer

As a rule....

2

Starting out:

Parents start a young child out athletically as a “joint venture.”

Most parents believe they are experiencing athletics with the child.

They wish to be involved in the process. Athletics is a link to their child.

Under the age of 10, a child’s main goal is to please their parents.

The parent is a credible source of knowledge.

​

Adolescents:

Athletes become more independent.

Parents need to stay close but focus on the athlete’s needs.

It is important for messages from parents and coaches do not conflict.

It is crucial that parents facilitate growth at an early age.

It is important for the parent to keep perspective.

The following suggestions reflect the athlete’s point of view.

Before the First Game

3

Parents ask yourself the following questions:

​

• Do I want them to play? If so, why?

​

• What will be a successful season for me as a parent?

​

• What are my goals for them?

​

• What do I hope they gain from the experience?

​

• What do I think their role will be on this team?

4

NEXT...

Parent should set up a one on one with their athlete. Sit silent and allow the athlete to share.

Questions for the athlete:

• Why are you playing?
• What is a successful season?
• What goals do you have?
• What do you think your role will be on the team?

SUCCESS!

Parents need to adjust their expectations to meet the athlete’s.

A season is never perfect.

There will always be problems.

It is imperative that there is a “mutual perspective” on expectations involving child’s athletic experience.

5

“

Relationship with the Coach:

• Set an appointment.
• The athlete should be present.
• The following topics are appropriate for discussion:
• Mental/physical treatment
• How to assist athlete in improvement.
• Concerns of athlete’s behavior.
• The following topics are not appropriate to discuss:
• Playing time.
• Team strategy or play calling.
• Other team members

6

RED FLAGS

7

A parent is taking things to seriously and has not released his child when:

• Trying to coach the athlete.
• Being nervous about the athlete’s game.
• Difficult time bouncing back after the athlete/team suffers a defeat.
• Makes mental notes to give advice.
• Is verbally critical of an official.

During the Game...

Positive Contributions:

1. Model appropriate behavior
2. Focus on the team and team goals
3. One instructional voice=coach.

Understand Roles:

​

1. Spectator
2. Competitor
3. Official
4. Coach

8

“Young people need models not critics” ~John Wooden

Players Roles

9

• Play the game for fun
• Be gracious when you win and graceful when you lose
• Respect and abide by the rules of the game
• Put the team ahead of yourself in every situation
• Accept decisions made by those in authority
• Demonstrate respect to your opponents, coaches and teammates.
• Be accountable for your own actions
• Develop a teachable spirit that allows you to take correction as a compliment
• Accept and embrace the discipline involved in athletics, because it benefits the team
• Develop the feeling of pride, base upon “share joy” of the team, and do not have pride that emanates from arrogance or a sense entitlement.
• Be an athlete of character

Coach’s Role

• Coach for the love of the game and the love of the athlete
• Put the welfare of your athletes above winning
• Accept and abide by the judgement of the officials and rules of the game as “mutual agreements” required to play within the spirit of the game
• Reward effort and behavior instead of outcome
• Give dignity to mistakes made with full speed and attention
• Lead with character and by example
• Put the needs of the team ahead of any individual
• Constantly work to improve your knowledge and ability to teach the game and the athletes
• Be willing to confront incorrect behavior or less than all-out effort
• Encourage multiple-sport participation
• Keep the game simple and fun
• Be willing to work with parents for the benefit of the individual athlete
• Develop a positive-demanding coaching style
• Be a model, not a critic; model appropriate behavior, poise and confidence
• Attend preseason team meetings

10

Parents Role

11

• Attend as many games as possible
• Do everything possible to make the athletic experience positive for your child and others
• View the game with team goals in mind
• Attempt to relieve competitive pressure, not increase it
• Encourage multiple-sport participation
• Release your children to the coach and the team
• Look upon opponents as friends involved in the same experience
• Accept the judgement of the officials and coaches; remain in control
• Accept the results of each game; do not make excuses
• Demonstrate winning and losing with dignity
• Dignify mistakes made by athletes who are giving their best effort and concentration
• Be an encourager-encourage athletes to keep their perspective in both victory and defeat
• Be a good listener
• Accept the goals, roles and achievements of your child

After the game...

12

Least favorite memory of an athlete...after the game in the car with the parents.

“JUST BE MY DAD!”

Questions +Criticism

Need time

and space

Parents…

Be a source of confidence and help build relationships.

• Time to recover
• Quiet understanding
• Reflective listener
• Athlete initiates the conversation

​

“I love to watch you play.”

Summary

13

Stop.

Think about the athletic experience.

The reasons the kids play.

Sports provide an opportunity to develop physically, mentally and emotionally.

Sports provide an opportunity to learn how

to work and get along with others,

to take risks, to learn to achieve goals by developing positive work habits,

and to succeed and fail with dignity.

Finally...sports provide the opportunity

to develop friendships

outside of the family

that can last a

lifetime.

Free templates for all your presentation needs