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Wellness Ambassador Training:

Beyond the Binary

Understanding and Exploring Gender

Colleen Arnold, PhD, LMFT Playlist

Erin Harrell, PsyD

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Recognize Our Own Bias

Questions to Ask Ourselves

  • What did I learn about gender and how did I learn it?
  • What were some of the covert messages I was exposed to about gender?
  • When I think about different gender identities, what do I notice myself feeling in response?
  • To what degree have I tried to view the world from the perspective of other identities?
  • What are my fears connected to different gender identities, in general and with students and what do I think will support me in looking past those fears?
  • How do I want to respond in moments when I’m having a hard time managing my own feelings?

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How Have We Thought

About Gender?

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“Oppositional Sexism”

This is the concept introduced by Julia Serano that male and female are two rigid, mutually exclusive categories, and that each gender is defined in some way by what the other is or isn’t. This creates a kind of identity feedback loop where one’s sense of gender also relies on the other’s adherence to their sense of gender. This might put some light on why gender nonconforming people may seem threatening to gender norms and individual gender identity.

Essentialist view of Gender

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Cisnormativity

Cisnormativity is the assumption that all, or almost all, individuals are cisgender.

Many trans* people and allies consider it to be offensive to presume that everyone is cisgender unless otherwise specified.

Although cisnormativity is rarely deliberate, it is almost always perceived as hurtful to the trans* community and contributes to the erasure of trans* and nonbinary experiences.

From The Queer Dictionary

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Moving Beyond the Binary

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CONCEPTUALIZING GENDER

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CONCEPTUALIZING GENDER

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The conceptual task is to give full weight both to the social processes that shape bodies, and to the way bodies themselves are active in social processes. To put this more technically, gender theory must recognize both social dynamics and the agency of bodies, and think both of them together (Connell, 2012)

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Challenges for GNC Folks

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While a person may feel a particular gender, there are ways in which the world either reinforces or denies their identity, such as:

  • the way people are addressed (ma’am or sir),
  • their gender markers on legal documents
  • having to choose a bathroom

These are some ways in which people are forced to conform to identities that don’t fit.

Gender is

experienced personally,

but validated (or invalidated) societally.

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Issues Impacting the Trans + GNC Experience

  • Invisibility and Erasure. There is currently very little representation of the trans or GNC experiences, and those that exist often focus on gender as the main focus of the person’s experience. These experiences are also absent from education (including sex education) and many areas of day-to-day life as a result of cisnormativity.

  • Gatekeeping. A person’s experience of gender is often not totally in their own control. Your driver’s license, your birth certificate, even your daily interactions reinforce a concept of your gender. In California, in order to access gender affirmation surgery and other services, trans folks require a letter from a mental health professional. Cisnormativity functions to lock people out of their own gender identity.

  • Dysphoria and disconnection from the body. Not all trans or GNC folks experience ‘gender dysphoria’ (which can be a response to gender oppression), however,

feeling as though your body doesn’t match your felt sense of gender

can create anxiety, negative self-feelings, and disassociation.

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Issues Impacting the Trans + GNC Experience

  • Uncertainty. There’s a strong story that GNC folks have “always known they were different,” but the reality is that different people may have shifting feelings about their gender throughout their lives. This story of “always knowing” can make it harder for folks to understand their gender and feel “trans enough” to claim this part of their identity.

  • Disconnection from Family and Community. For trans and GNC folks, coming out may cost them relationships with friends and family. Even if family and friends are accepting, there is an adjustment period as folks learn correct name and pronouns.

  • Changing Privilege Status. One experience that some folks have talked about in their transition process is the change in treatment they experience based on their gender. This can be a scary experience, and it brings people very close to the heartbreak

of systems of power.

  • Trauma. GNC folks experience trauma at a higher rate then Cis Folks from gender

based discrimination, higher rates of being the recipient of violence (4xs),

experiences of family ejection, higher rates of homelessness (80%

compared to 54%) and others causes.

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Ways to Support

How To Be Non-Binary Affirmative

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You don’t have to understand what it means for someone to be non-binary to respect them. Some people haven’t heard a lot about non-binary genders or have trouble understanding them, and that’s okay. But identities that some people don’t understand still deserve respect.

Use the name a person asks you to use. This is one of the most critical aspects of being respectful of a non-binary person. Don’t ask someone what their old name was.

Try not to make any assumptions about people’s gender. You can’t tell if someone is non-binary simply by looking at them, just like how you can’t tell if someone is transgender just by how they look.

If you’re not sure what pronouns someone uses, ask. Different non-binary people may use different pronouns. Many non-binary people use “they” while others use “he” or “she,” and still others use other pronouns. Asking may feel awkward at first, but is one of the simplest and most important ways to show respect for someone’s identity.

Advocate for non-binary friendly policies. It’s important for non-binary people to be able to live, dress and have their gender respected at work, at school and in public spaces.

Understand that, for many non-binary people, figuring out which bathroom (locker room etc.) to use can be challenging. Non-binary people should be supported by being able to use the restroom that they believe they will be safest in.

Talk to non-binary people to learn more about who they are. There’s no one way to be non-binary..

For cisgender folx: It’s important to investigate the extent to which gender-based privilege has impacted their experiences and opportunities, and to investigate the narratives they’ve been taught about gender diverse folks.

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Being Gender Conscious in Group Settings

Good phrases to address a group of people…”Hi”:

  • All.
  • You.
  • Team.
  • Everyone/everybody.
  • Folks/Folx
  • People.
  • Friends/pals/peeps (informal settings)

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Accessing Counseling

  • Students can schedule appointments online at https://health.csueastbay.edu
  • Students can call (510) 885-3735 or email shcscounseling@csueastbay.edu if they can’t find an appointment online
  • Crisis Appointments are available daily at 1pm and 3pm
  • ProtoCall phone service available after hours - (510) 885-3735 Option 2

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