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Understanding & Preventing Bullying & Harassment

Laura Thomas,

Antioch University New England

Adapted from the work of Kim John Payne

Center for Social Sustainability, http://www.socialsustain.com/

http://tinyurl.com/AUNE-Bullying

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Turn to the person next to you!

  • Introduce yourself (if necessary)
  • Talk about 1-2 things you hope to learn today.

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This person is your partner today.

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Today I hope you learn a bit about

  • What bullying & harassment look like
  • What NH law says about bullying & harassment
  • What causes bullying & harassment
  • How to prevent bullying & harassment.

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With your partner:

Think back on one small experience (it should fit in an emotional “paper cup”) with bullying or harassment.

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Keep it small- don’t use a serious or traumatic event that will prevent you from engaging in the rest of the workshop.

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HB 1523- “to protect all children from bullying and cyberbullying”

“Bullying” means a single significant incident or a pattern of incidents involving a written, verbal, or electronic communication, or a physical act or gesture, or any combination thereof, directed at another pupil which:

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(1) Physically harms a pupil or damages the pupil’s property;

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(2) Causes emotional distress to a pupil;

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(3) Interferes with a pupil’s educational opportunities;

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(4) Creates a hostile educational environment; or

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(5) Substantially disrupts the orderly operation of the school.

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And…

(a) Occurs on, or is delivered to, school property or a school-sponsored activity or event on or off school property; or

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(b) Occurs off of school property or outside of a school-sponsored activity or event, if the conduct interferes with a pupil’s educational opportunities or substantially disrupts the orderly operations of the school or school-sponsored activity or event.

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So it’s bullying if:

  • It prevents the student from learning or
  • Makes the student feel unsafe physically or emotionally

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Whether it occurs on or off school property

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What about “cyberbulling?”

  • “Cyberbullying” is the same as bullying but includes:
  • telephones, (including cell phones & text messages)
  • pagers,
  • computers, electronic mail, instant messaging, and websites.
  • And other electronic devices.

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Schools must:

  • Have a policy against bullying and cyberbulling that includes consequences and a policy for notifying parents.
  • Make it public.
  • Train you in how to recognize and report it.

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With your partner

Take 2 minutes to talk about what

    • surprises,
    • worries
    • or encourages you

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about this new law.

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We are social creatures!

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Three Discipline Responses

  • Social Inclusion
  • Disciplinary
  • Therapeutic

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We can’t learn when we’re afraid

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Some New Vocabulary:

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Social Complexity

  • Where I fit into the pecking order or the social system.
    • What do I say?
    • What do I wear?
    • Will I have the right shoes/ clothes/ lunchbox?
    • Will anyone be my friend?
    • What if they hate me?
    • What if someone is mean to me?

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What would your students say are “socially complex” situations in their day-to-day lives?

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Form Predictability

  • How I know things are going to progress from one moment to the next.
    • Where do I sit?
    • Where do I put my bag?
    • Where is the bathroom? The nurse?
    • What happens if I make a mistake?

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What would your students say are predictable or unpredictable situations in their day-to-day lives?

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Stress/ Reactive Behaviors

Fight

Flight

Flock

Freeze

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BEST FORMULA EVER (BFE)

Social Complexity

Form Predictability

+

=

Stress / Reactive Behaviors

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What are the “hot spots” in the daily schedule or in the building where there is high complexity and low predictability or structure? What can we do to change that?

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Let’s take a break!

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What do we know about kids who bully?

  • They lack
      • Perspective
      • Empathy
      • Impulse control
      • Imagination and fantasy
  • But sometimes they
      • Like the power
      • Are bored
      • Are frustrated

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What can we do?

  • Refuse put-downs- be brave but respectful!
  • Make expectations clear
  • Create a culture of politeness and kindness
  • Preview & Review
  • Be aware of adult talk
  • Tattling vs. Truth Telling

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In the moment:

  • Disapprove (w/ Affirmation if possible)
  • Discover what’s going one
  • Do- Over: Plan for what you can do differently next time

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Don’t just do something- stand there!

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With your partner:

  • What is one idea from today that you can picture yourself using?
  • How?
  • In what situation?

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Thank you!

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lthomas@antioch.edu