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Writing a letter

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The difference between formal and informal

Formal

Professional

Academic

No contractions

No colloquialisms

Avoid first person pronouns

Unemotional

Informal

Casual

Spontaneous

Communicating with friends and family

Personal emails

Text messages

Emotional

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To whom do we write a formal or informal letter?

Formal letters are written to:

Employer

Businesses

Organisations

Informal letters are written to:

Members of your family.

Friends.

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Formal writing

  • Should be polite in its tone
  • Should be correctly punctuated
  • Should use ambitious vocabulary
  • Should use connectives; therefore, firstly etc.
  • Should not use slang

https://www.uts.edu.au/sites/default/files/HELPS%20Formal%20and%20Informal%20Language.pdf

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Formal writing does not use contractions

Definition: a shortened form of a word or group of words, with the omitted letters often replaced in written English by an apostrophe, as e'er forever, isn't for is not, dep't for department.

Informal: The improvements can’t be introduced due to finding restrictions.

Formal: Improvements cannot be introduced due to finding restrictions.

Informal: I don’t believe that the results are accurate. (No first person pronouns)

Formal: The results are not believed to be accurate.

Informal: The research project won’t continue next year.

Formal: The research project will not continue next year.

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Formal writing does not use phrasal verbs

Definition: a combination of verb and one or more adverbial or prepositional particles, as catch on, take off, bring up, or put up with, functioning as a single semantic unit and often having an idiomatic meaning that could not be predicted from the meanings of the individual parts.

Informal: The balloon was blown up for the experiment.

Formal: The balloon was inflated for the experiment.

Informal: The patient got over his illness.

Formal: The patient recovered from his illness.

Informal: The results of the study were mixed up.

Formal: The results of the study were confused.

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Formal writing does not use slang or colloquialism

Definition for slang: very informal usage in vocabulary and idiom that is characteristically more metaphorical, playful, elliptical, vivid, and ephemeral than ordinary language, as Hit the road.

Definition for colloquialism: characteristic of or appropriate to ordinary or familiar conversation rather than formal speech or writing; informal.

Informal: The mob was very rowdy during the protest against cuts to university funding.

Formal: The crowd was very rowdy during the protest against the cuts to university funding.

Informal: Lecteurs still count on students to use correct grammar and punctuation in essays.

Formal: Lecteurs expect students to use correct grammar and punctuation in essays.

Informal: It was raining cats and dogs.

Formal: It was raining very heavily.

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Formal writing does not use first person pronouns

Definition: a pronoun form in the first person, as I or am in English, or aset of such forms.

Informal: I considered various research method for the study.

Formal: Various research methods were considered for the study.

Informal: We believe that practise is unsustainable.

Formal: It is believed the practise is unsustainable.

Informal: During the interview I asked students about their experiences.

Formal: During the interview student were asked about their experiences.

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Suggestions

The following are things we need to work on to get a ‘c’:

  • Capital letters, full stops and commas
  • There/their and they’re
  • Apostrophes

The following will impress:

  • Colons
  • DAFOREST
  • Advanced sentence starters

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Plan

  1. Addresses
  2. Why I am writing
  3. Wrong seat
  4. Messy train
  5. Loud
  6. I want a refund

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Opening

Your name

Your address

Your city/town

Date written in full

To whom you are writing

Recipient's address

City/town of the recipient

Dear Sir/Madam,

Explain your argument and why you feel this way.

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Content

Give examples of the disruption the late train caused (write this in the past).

I missed my flight due to the lateness of the train.

Lack of clear information.

I was tired of waiting and there was nowhere for me to rest.

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Closing information

Give some solutions to the problem (write in the future).

You should maintain your trains properly to ensure they do not break down. Also, if a train is delayed you must offer alternative transportation such as a bus so passengers can arrive on time.

Yours sincerely,

Reuben

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1st paragraph - Opening information

Reuben Murray

Lönnrotinkatu 39c 53

Helsinki

15th May 2018

London Underground

15 Shamrock Street

London

Dear sir/madam,

I wish to express my dissatisfaction with your train company. Last weekend, the train had got stuck in the tunnel when I was waiting at the platform for our next train to arrive. Let me get straight to the point: the lateness of your train was poorly handled and I wish to request a full refund.

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2nd paragraph- 1st problem

I needed to get on that train because it travels to the airport. I missed my flight. In my opinion, this whole incident should not have occured.

Do you think it is acceptable for your trains to be horrendously late? Around 1.265 billion passengers rely on your service each year and it is your obligation to ensure these customers arrive on time. I am asking for you to take reasonable responsibility for your trains to run on time. I was late, stressed and angry after using your rail service.

Direct address

Alliteration

Fact

Opinion

Rhetorical question

Emotive language

Statistics

Three adjectives in a row

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3rd paragraph- 2nd problem

I waited for what seemed like an interminably, dragged out, long time before any information was given. The announcer said that my train’s arrival at this platform was delayed due to the other train behind mine being broken down in a tunnel. 5% of people end up missing their fights despite checking in, though I am sure this percentage increased due to unhelpful information. The announcer said that the train would be fixed in 35 minutes but, provided no alternative method of travel. I believe many of the passengers were like on the way to the airport and would need to arrive on time or do you think the planes will wait for us?

Direct address

Alliteration

Fact

Opinion

Rhetorical question

Emotive language

Statistics

Three adjectives in a row

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4th paragraph- 3rd problem

I was tired of waiting and there was nowhere for me to rest. All of the benches at this platform were full. There was nowhere for me to sit and I spend the whole time standing. The air was stale, stifling and stuffy making me feel extremely uncomfortable. I recently read that commuters on the London Underground were breathing around 12 million toxic nanodust particles per minute. With such poor air quality it would be better not to keep us waiting for so long on the underground station. Do you wish to be known as the train provider from hell? Because, I consider it to be the worst travel experience of my life.

Direct address

Alliteration

Fact

Opinion

Rhetorical question

Emotive language

Statistics

Three adjectives in a row

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5th paragraph - Closing information

I suggest you do the following to prevent customers from being as tormented as I was. You should maintain your trains properly to ensure they do not break down. Also, if a train is delayed you must offer alternative transportation such as a bus. If a train has been delayed the tannoy announcer must inform the waiting passengers on the platform why the train is late, when the train will exactly arrive and what other alternative transport methods are available. You could provide somewhere to rest and enough seating for passengers. More ventilators need to be installed and plants could furnish areas of the Underground to improve the air quality.

I hope you take these matters into consideration.

Yours faithfully,

Reuben

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Writing a letter

Begin writing

Preparation

1.Note taking

Collect relevant information as notes for you argument.

2.Form sentences

Create sentences from the notes you have taken.

3.Group Information

Decide on three themes and three solutions for each problem. Group the sentences into those three themes.

5.Introduction

Introduce yourself. Outline the content of your letter.

6.Content

Using the grouped information collected in preparation write first the themes in three paragraphs using DAFOREST.

Conclude

7.Ending with solution

End your letter reminding the reader of your three main points and how they can be resolved.

8.Proofread

Make sure your spelling and punctuation is correct. Make sure the sentences make sense. Make sure you are using the right tense.

4.Write details of the letter

Write your name and address, date, recipients company/name and address and “Dear Sir/Madam”.

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Exam question

Section 1: Directed Writing Question 1

Imagine that your aunt and uncle are considering educating your cousin at home and have asked for your views. Your cousin is an only child and, in your opinion, rather spoilt. Write a letter to your aunt and uncle in which you should explain:

• the advantages of being home schooled

• the reasons why home-schooling may not be advisable

• why you would or would not recommend home-schooling for your cousin.

Base your letter on the fact file and the magazine article (slides 11-13), but be careful to use your own words. Address each of the three bullets. Begin your letter: ‘Dear Aunt and Uncle…’. Write about 250 to 350 words. Up to 10 marks are available for the content of your answer, and up to 15 marks for the quality of your writing.

In other words:

You must consider whether home schooling would be better for a spoilt child and the arguments you can use in favour of this position.

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Like any young person opening that fateful envelope on results day, Katherine Weitz looks anxious. The offer of a university place hangs in the balance, after all, as years of hard work and commitment come down to this. Her parents are concerned too. They’re wondering whether they made the right decision some years ago when Katherine left her local school and enrolled in Futures Academy, a virtual school providing an education based entirely on learning online. Katherine’s mother, Aditi, says there’s no such person as a ‘typical’ virtual school student but that an increasing number of children find that ordinary schools just don’t work for them. When chronic illness struck her daughter at the age of 15, Aditi knew that Katherine’s school wouldn’t be able to cope with a poor attender who was also bright and ambitious. ‘Then I remembered that my own mother studied accountancy by correspondence course many years ago while bringing up small children. Surely with all the resources of twenty-first century technology, new life could be breathed into an old idea?’

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Questions

How does Futures Academy teach its students?

They teach students by learning online.

What happened to Aditi when she was 15?

She had chronic illness.

How did the mother come upon the idea of teaching in this way?

She remembered that her mother studied about accountancy by correspondence course many years ago.

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Aditi discovered that all over the world, virtual schools are indeed reinventing ways to bring education to students in different, innovative and exciting ways. Rather than narrowing Katherine’s experience, as people often imagine happens when students don’t attend a traditional school, Aditi is convinced that her daughter’s social interaction is broader, even though it’s not face-to-face: ‘Katherine’s online classmates talk regularly in the school’s chatrooms and she’s formed strong friendships with disabled students, young people with caring responsibilities at home, teenage mothers or students who live in far-flung places many kilometres from a ‘real’ school. She’s met a wider range of people and most young people socialise more online than face-to-face in any case these days, don’t they?’ Aditi says. There is clearly a demand for this kind of education. The number of students learning exclusively online has increased rapidly since 2000 and virtual schools are beginning to appear in many different countries. Although often parents have to pay quite high fees to educate their children this way, in some places public funds are used because virtual schools are seen as a viable alternative to spending on school buildings. Whether such schools will ever educate the poor, those who would benefit most from a decent education, remains to be seen.

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Questions

Where are the virtual schools?

The virtual schools are all over the world.

How do students communicate?

They communicate in the school’s chatroom.

What is the alternative spending for a normal school?

Virtual schools are seen as a viable alternative to spending on school buildings.

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Even before the illness, Katherine’s father, Carl, had been unimpressed by his daughter’s more conventional education. Her progress, he felt, was only as fast as the slowest student in a class of over 30, and Katherine was losing interest in the subjects she used to love. ‘It’s not cool to be clever in many ordinary schools,’ he said, ‘and such attitudes, especially when expressed violently by school bullies in the playground, can be a powerful influence in young people’s lives.’ For the last two years, Katherine has made rapid progress. It hasn’t always been easy though. She says there were times when her motivation flagged and she missed the ‘buzz’ of the classroom, even though she had well-qualified tutors with time to devote to each individual student. Although she never considered giving up, many virtual school students do. The quality of the teaching on offer can vary considerably and sometimes tutors are responsible for too many students and don’t mind when some of them don’t bother to do much work. On the other hand, Katherine says she’ll never forget the encouragement and support of her online tutors and considers them ‘special teachers’ who focus on exactly what each student needs in order to do well. When she opens her envelope, Katherine’s broad smile is soon mirrored by those on the faces of her relieved mum and dad. University beckons – but Katherine has yet to decide whether that’ll be a ‘real’ or a virtual one!

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Introduction

Reuben Murray

Lönnerotinkatu 39c

Helsinki

25th May 2018

Colin and Kathleen Murray

68 Ashen Grove

London

Dear Aunt Kathleen and Uncle Colin,

I heard you are considering about educating cousin Timothy at home. I have done some research into the matter and found about both positive and negative things for home-schooling.

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Paragraph 1

an increasing number of children find that ordinary schools just don’t work for them.

with all the resources of twenty-first century technology, new life could be breathed into an old idea?’

all over the world, virtual schools are indeed reinventing ways to bring education to students in different, innovative and exciting ways. social interaction is broader, formed strong friendships with disabled students, young people with caring responsibilities at home, most young people socialise more online than face-to-face in any case

viable alternative to spending on school buildings. Her progress, he felt, was only as fast as the slowest student in a class of over 30, Katherine was losing interest in the subjects she used to love. ‘It’s not cool to be clever in many ordinary schools,’ expressed violently by school bullies For the last two years, Katherine has made rapid progress. she’ll never forget the encouragement and support of her online tutors

In a public school, he might get expelled if he’s breaking the rules. Whereas in a virtual school, behaviour issues do not cause disruption. His friends could come from different countries, around the world, if he studies online. Cousin Timothy is often sick and unable to attend school which has caused his teachers much frustration. This would not be a problem if Timothy were learning online. I feel that we should use the technology of the 21st century in learning, especially as this is how young people communicate today.

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Paragraph 2

wondering whether they made the right decision some years ago when Katherine left her local school

often parents have to pay quite high fees

Whether such schools will ever educate the poor, those who would benefit most from a decent education, remains to be seen.

she missed the ‘buzz’ of the classroom,

giving up, many virtual school students do. The quality of the teaching on offer can vary considerably and sometimes tutors are responsible for too many students and don’t mind when some of them don’t bother to do much work.

At home-school, it is hard to attend special events which would normally be put on by the school. You can’t do as school exchange from a virtual school. You might have to pay high fees for him to go to virtual school, but his current school is free. My cousin might miss the general hustle and bustle of the classroom. At a conventional school one is introduced to the school rules. Teaching can be very different from class to class as they do not operate in the same building. Also the teachers have a large number of pupils and don’t have the close relationship to each pupil that a teacher in a real school might have.

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Paragraph 3

  • draw inferences and make judgements about whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages in this particular case.
  • Compare the persona’s ability to thrive.

Overall I believe home-schooling would not be suitable for Timothy. Timothy is a practical learner and he enjoys the special events put on by a conventional school. He really enjoys sports day, school trips and school exchanges. Timothy has been somewhat spoilt and his teachers are aware of his difficult behaviour. At a virtual school they might not be aware of this and might not care. Timothy enjoys hanging out with his classmates and the atmosphere of a class full of pupils.

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Ending

I wish him all the best no matter which school he goes to.

Best wishes,

Reuben

Remember that this is an informal letter so there is no need to end it with “yours sincerely” or “yours faithfully”

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A1 Advantages of being home schooled.

  • Enjoyable.
  • Active.
  • Can follow own interests.
  • Can go on visits, for example, to museums.
  • Avoids boredom.
  • Existence.
  • Allows more time for work experience.
  • Statistics suggest home-schooled students are higher academic achievers.

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A2 Reasons why home-schooling may not be advisable

  • No GCSEs or A level qualifications; difficult and expensive if not attached to a school.
  • Some universities do not accept home-schooled applicants.
  • Requires self-discipline; no deadlines, homework, exams or timetable.
  • Some children may watch too much television.
  • Cost of private tutors.
  • Can lead to isolation; requires proactive socialising.
  • Socio-economic factors crucial to outcome.
  • Still only a tiny proportion of students are home-schooled.
  • Not all parents are effective teachers.

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A3 Recommendation for this rather spoilt only child

  • The child can choose own teachers or danger of disliking teachers who make demands.
  • Can choose to work at favourite subjects or reject subjects that are disliked.
  • Will develop or fail to develop independent research skills.
  • Will become more mature and self-motivated or will remain childish and non-achieving.
  • Firm but flexible parental support on an individual basis may encourage the cousin or be rejected.
  • May miss the regular company and competition of other school children.
  • May reject notions of self-discipline/deadlines/schedules of work.
  • May expect to be indulged/do what (s)he wanted.

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Important quality to response

The discriminator is the evaluation of the arguments, which requires candidates to draw inferences and make judgements about whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages in this particular case. Perceptive responses may compare the persona’s ability to thrive in these circumstances with the personality of the cousin (or indeed other children), and this should affect the decision. Ideas and opinions must be derived from the passage, developing its claims and assessing their implications with clear and persuasive arguments.

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Questions

How fast was Katherine’s progress at a conventional school?

Her progress was only as fast as the slowest student.

What did Katherine miss from the class?

She missed the buzz of the classroom.

What does the text say about the quality of teaching?

The quality of teaching on offer can be vary considerabley.

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Exam question

Imagine you work for a traditional, family-run business. The owner, Mr Hsu, is keen on taking part in the next series of ‘Workplace Choirs’. Not all of the 45 staff are happy about the idea. Mr Hsu has asked you to give your honest opinion on whether the business should take part or not. Write a letter offering your opinion and advice. In your letter you should:

  • Evaluate the benefits and problems for the business if it takes part
  • Explain the concerns staff may have about taking part and how these concerns may be overcome.
  • Base your letter on what you have read in the article on the following slides, but be careful to use your own words.
  • Begin your letter, ‘Dear Mr Hsu, Taking part in this TV show could be…’.
  • Write about 250 to 350 words.

Up to 10 marks are available for the content of your answer, and up to 15 marks for the quality of your writing.

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The article:

In this magazine article, the writer has agreed to take part in a TV reality series named ‘Workplace Choirs’. This TV series follows the experiences of all the staff in an organisation who learn to sing together under the guidance of professional musicians. Viewers vote for their favourite choir.

Workplace Choirs

‘Anyone can join,’ reads the recruitment poster in the office canteen. ‘No experience required, just come along.’ That isn’t entirely correct. There are ‘Auditions’. Does that mean I have to sing in front of people? My plan in agreeing to be a choir member at all involved lurking anonymously in the back row.

We’re all under pressure to audition – no excuses accepted. Afterwards, we’ll be told who’s made it and who hasn’t. Those selected will then be rehearsed mercilessly and sent to battle with choirs from other workplaces to see which one triumphs. The ‘highs and lows’ will be broadcast live to the nation as we go – yes, the whole thing will be televised!

This is now series six of the show worldwide, so it seems workplace choirs are here to stay. People apparently enjoy singing in groups and the health benefits are indisputable. With big business in on the act though, aren’t these choirs really just free advertising for their companies?

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Questions

Why is it not true that “anyone can join”?

Because, there are auditions.

What are members pressurized in to?

They are all under pressure to audition.

If you are selected what are you expected to do?

Those had been selected by being rehearsed mercilessly and sent to battle with choirs from other workplaces.

How much of it will be televised?

The whole thing would be televised.

What are the benefits of singing?

People enjoy singing in groups and there are health benefits.

How does the write suppose companies benefit from taking part?

She thinks the choirs generate free advertising for their companies.

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That’s not what the promotional video we watch before auditions claims. Hilary Queen, head of retail giant Canco which won the last series, explains: ‘Choirs are popping up everywhere, in schools and hospitals too. Modern managers understand they rely on teamwork. Choirs need people to do different things together, without losing focus. Choirs develop a workforce’s confidence and resilience.’

I’ll need resilience to stand the shame of revealing my dulcet tones in front of Abi-from-Accounts. Her target is the solo spot. She’s been practising loudly at the water-cooler for weeks.

Having auditions seems a bit much if you’re trying to encourage people to sing. A choir isn’t a sports team, is it? I don’t mind admitting I’m rubbish at football, but I’ll feel rejected if my bathroom baritone turns out to make everyone’s toes curl. It’s personal when someone says you can’t sing.

‘It’s great seeing people’s faces when you say they’re in,’ chirps the choirmaster. ‘It really boosts their confidence being part of the team.’ He’s genuinely enthusiastic, but missing my point.

For those who are ‘in’ there’ll be endless hours of rehearsing, shift-swopping to be there, bickering when no-one can agree which song to sing or who gets the best bits. There may be no ‘I’ in ‘team’: there is, it seems, in ‘choir’.

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‘I love singing. Being on TV’s a great opportunity. I couldn’t believe I’d been selected to sing the opening solo on a world-famous stage,’ gushes series-one-finalist Carie. ‘It’s the breakthrough I needed to get into the music industry. I’m not in insurance anymore.’

What if we all sound awful though, and people don’t turn up for rehearsals?

‘Sticking at it when things aren’t working out is something I teach my staff. Every workforce needs discipline,’ scolds Queen in the video. ‘Employers also need to commit time and resources, by providing spaces for rehearsal, and being flexible with rotas.’

But is it necessary to be on TV while you’re struggling to learn the music? Aren’t producers going to smell any whiff of drama, behind-the-scenes sob stories, frictions? What’s a workplace choir supposed to be for anyway? The motivational video describes harmonious days spent bonding, laughing and singing together. I find myself drawn, moth-like. My company needs me. I’m determined not to let them down, though my football coach might be less impressed when I miss practices at weekends for rehearsals.

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‘It’s been a journey,’ reflects tenor Dan in the next clip of the video, his long-suffering family in the background. ‘From initial terror to a sense of achievement when you hear the applause – I didn’t think I had it in me. I can’t imagine my life without the choir.’

Unsurprisingly, small-business-owner Bob, doesn’t feature in the promotional footage. ‘I can’t afford time off for my employees to have a sing-along,’ he grumbles. ‘They should sort out their own hobbies.’

Overwhelmed with the demands of running their businesses, many other employers claim neither the time nor resources for workplace choirs. Some bosses worry they’ll be misrepresented by TV producers, keen to catch conflict on camera. Meanwhile, producers defend the series. ‘In many workplaces staff at different levels of the workforce rarely meet, whereas in a choir they all need to work together. That difference makes for interesting viewing.’

‘I got to know colleagues I’d never even spoken to,’ Dan continues. ‘We had a list of all the choir members. There were loads of emails going back and forth every day. Sometimes it was hard to get any work done!’

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