Supporting Child & Adolescent Development As We Move Forward

Presented by Dr. Stephanie Grant

St. Joseph Public Schools

March 17, 2022

TONIGHT’S STRUCTURE

Agenda

• What is Trauma & How Do We Support Our Children?
• What is the Difference Between Anxiety & Trauma and How Do Support Our Anxious Children?
• What is Self-Regulation & How Do We Help it Develop?

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WHAT IS TRAUMA & �HOW DOES IT OCCUR?

What is Trauma?

• Trauma is anything that is deeply distressing to an individual
• May be physical (an injury)
• May be psychological
• With children it is often both
• Trauma is best thought of as a response not as an event
• Trauma is cumulative
• We don’t know how much a child can withstand
• Big “T” versus little “t” trauma

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Trauma Doesn’t Always Create Traumatization

• Often, relationships help to buffer the effects of trauma
• Children may not need counseling after a death or natural disaster
• Can depend on the severity and duration of the stressor AND on whether the stressor also affected the caregivers
• Can also depend on genetics

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Neurodevelopmental Trauma V. PTSD

• Often early trauma and/or repeated traumatic events, frequently that occur within the context of a child-caregiver relationship, that change how brains function and are structured
• Not a one time event
• Related to the ACE Research
• Adverse Childhood Experiences

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COVID as a Trauma Event

• The COVID-19 Pandemic has been a distressing event for many people all over the world
• Some are more impacted or distressed than others
• Trauma events tends to more distressing when:
• We don’t know when/if they will end
• They feel inescapable and uncontrollable
• They keep us from people who would normally help us through stress

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The Impact the Last 2 Years Has Had on All of Our Bodies is Significant.��We Cannot Ignore That In Our Attempt to “Get Back To Normal”.

How Do We Support Our Children

• Don’t try to always “make it better”, “sweep it under the rug”, or ignore tricky things
• Acknowledge difficult and hard things – call them out and give words to them
• Normalize what it is to have big feelings and bodily responses to them by talking about them in a normal way

How Do We Support Our Children

• Look for moments:
• To give space and acceptance for feelings
• To give strategies and solutions to problems
• Scripts:
• Do you want me to just listen or help you figure this out?
• Would you like a hug? You can let go when you’re ready.
• That sucks. I’m sorry.
• Yeah, sometimes I feel that way too. It’s not fun.
• That makes sense. Thanks for helping me understand.

How Do We Support Our Children

• If there are significant symptoms and/or no improvement over about a month, consider seeking professional support
• This may not be something you need, but its something your family deserves
• Mental health therapies, occupational therapies, psychotropic medications can all be supportive to get through traumas
• Yoga, exercise, being outside, being in a community of some sort, volunteering, etc. are other ways to gain support

IT IS TRAUMA OR ANXIETY?

Trauma Versus Anxiety

• If there has been a potentially traumatizing event, its more difficult to rule out trauma as an underlying factor for anxiety symptoms
• We’ve all be in one
• Trauma and anxiety go hand in hand
• If there’s been trauma, there’s anxiety
• If there’s anxiety, there’s NOT necessarily been trauma
• Are the symptoms specific to something? Global?

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Anxiety Disorders

• Separation Anxiety Disorder
• Selective Mutism
• Phobias
• Social Anxiety Disorder
• Panic Disorder
• Agoraphobia
• Generalized Anxiety Disorder
• Unspecified or Other Anxiety Disorder

Current Symptoms/Coping Skills

• Picking (hair, nails, skin, etc.)
• Toileting issues
• Masturbation
• Sleep disturbances
• Eating changes
• Separation anxiety
• Rigidity/control
• Dissociation
• Lack of engagement

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Current Symptoms/Coping Skills

• Depression/anxiety
• Anger
• Sadness
• Isolation/withdrawal
• Obsessive/compulsive behaviors
• May be health related
• Increased screen time
• Repeated shows, younger shows, shows without words

How Do We Support Our Children

• Don’t try to reason/logic them out of being anxious
• Understand this isn’t something they’re doing to make life difficult or that they can necessarily control
• Provide accommodations as appropriate without giving them more reasons to feel their anxiety is reasonable
• The younger the child, the more shifting may need done on your part as a caregiver
• Understand the benefit of professional support

SELF-REGULATION

What is Self-Regulation?

• Self-regulation addresses how well someone can face a stressor and recover
• Not the same thing as obedience
• The more self-regulation a person has, the more they can tolerate difficult things
• Often impacted by anxiety and trauma
• In both directions

What is Self-Regulation?

• Lack of self-regulation can look like:
• Disproportionate emotional reactions & emotional extremes
• Attention difficulties
• Tantrums/outbursts that feel random
• Low frustration tolerance
• Low ability to self-sooth

Self-Regulation Development

• Infants cannot self-regulate
• Sensitive period for this is between 18 and 36 months of age
• A neurotypical infant/toddler population does not have the skill of self-regulating yet
• Self-regulation only develops in the context of a relationship

Co-Regulation Leads to Self-Regulation

• Repetitive experiences of coregulation develop a person’s capacity for self-regulation
• Strategies that “push you in” instead of “pull you away” will be most effective

The Stress Cup

Neurological Development

• Survival pieces are put in place first
• Brainstem
• Develops prenatally
• Only part of the brain fully developed at birth
• Hardest part of the brain to change
• Limbic system (emotion centers)
• Only partially functional at birth
• Cortex (thinking centers)
• Largely undeveloped at birth
• Prefrontal cortex
• Doesn’t start developing until around 3 years

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Neurological Developments

• Only a couple parts of the brain are actually able to think, the rest simply does
• If we’re more aroused, we rely on “reacting” parts of the brain and not “thinking” parts
• Because a different part of the brain is driving stress behaviors, we have to care for children differently in these moments to change/prevent behaviors
• This doesn’t mean we give up anything we know can be effective
• Children may just not be ready for those strategies in those moments

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Teach Well

• A brain will not be able to learn multiple things at once in an escalated moment
• Focus your expectations/priorities for teaching
• You’re not coddling, you’re teaching
• You understand the need to remediate for academics if kids weren’t at grade level
• Remember to remediate for social and emotional skills, too

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A bar that was set low

and scaled successfully

will always be better than a bar

that was set too high

that sets a child up for failure

What experiences does this child need to have to learn?

Coregulation Strategies

• Pause and wait for their brain to shift
• Ignore the reaction and be ready to reinforce the intention
• Before or after
• “Redo” or “Try again” cues

Keep Expectations Low

• Don’t hold expectations firm when you’re trying to deescalate if they’re not related to safety
• Exs: You may not require a please AND a nice voice; You may not require an immediate repair
• “I could tell that was too tricky right now”
• “I could see it was a good idea if I helped”
• Help the child meet expectations
• Exs: Do the handwriting on the assignment; bring shoes to them

Side Stepping

• If the child is cycling in a high arousal state of fear, anxiety, or rage, don’t focus on “pushing through” to get to an end
• Learning is not likely to occur here
• It will be exhausting
• It will take much longer
• Instead distract, use humor, do something silly or unexpected, etc. to give the child an “out”

Coregulation Strategies

• The more you decrease intensity, intimacy, and vulnerability, the more you increase capacity
• Try things more quickly (ninja-style)
• Nonchalant tone
• Indirect eye contact
• Move out of the interaction quickly

Every failure will deepen the trauma and strengthen the neural pathways contributing to the negative behaviors.

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Limit the chance for failures.

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Meet children where they’re at and provide the support they need so that they can begin to experience success and change.

Contact Information

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Dr. Stephanie Grant

(616) 594-0554

sgrant@debh.org

facebook.com/stephaniegrantphd

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