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Estrella’s Professional Development:

Regulation October 2023

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Nuestra declaración de misión:

The Estrellas team proactively engages with all students, staff, and families to support social-emotional well-being in a collaborative, evidence-based, and compassionate manner in an affirming environment. We believe that a strong and equitable social-emotional foundation is critical to a positive self-concept and advocacy for self and others. Social-emotional learning impacts academic success, healthy relationships, growth mindset, resilience, and life-long happiness.

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What is self-regulation?

Conscious Discipline:

Self-regulation is the ability to regulate our thoughts, feelings and actions. It is the essential skill that allows us to put a pause between impulse and action.

Collaborative for Social-Emotional Learning (CASEL):

The abilities to manage one’s emotions, thoughts, and behaviors effectively in different situations and to achieve goals and aspirations.

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Conscious Discipline and Self-Regulation

  1. What you offer to others, you strengthen within yourself.

As you teach children to manage their emotional states you become more skilled at managing your own.

2. Whoever you believe to be in charge of your feelings, you have placed in charge of you.

When we attempt to make others responsible for our feelings, we also give them responsibility and power to make things better or worse for us.

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FEELINGS

POWER

RESPONSIBILITY

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Who has the ball?

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Who has the ball?

Ms.Glenda: “ Juan it’s time to clean up. Pick up all the blocks and put them on the shelves”

Juan ignores the teacher and continues to build. However, Ms.Glenda is feeling tired today and is in no mood to deal with Juan.

Ms.Glenda: “Juan I do not have time for this today. Pick up the blocks this instant! Don’t make this hard.”

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Who has the ball?

Juan: “Shut up and leave me alone”

Ms.Glenda: “ Don’t talk to me like that. It is disrespectful. I won’t have it! You will have to stay here during recess”

Juan kicks down all the blocks around him, then pushes other toys off a shelf and attempts to hit Ms.Glenda.

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“If I feel angry, I can choose to manage my own feelings and use them to motivate me to change. I can regulate myself and communicate with you”

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Who has the ball?

Ms.Glenda: “ Juan it’s time to clean up. Pick up all the blocks and put them on the shelves”

Juan ignores the teacher and continues to build. Ms.Glenda is feeling tired today and is in no mood to deal with Juan.

She consciously recognizes this frustration brewing within. She takes a deep breath and thinks to herself, I’m safe, keep breathing. I can handle this.

Once she is calm she walks over to Juan, waits for him to make eye contact and helps shift his focus from playing to cleaning.

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Who has the ball?

Ms.Glenda: Juan, there you are. It is time to clean up. You have a choice. You can clean up the cars first or the blocks. Which is better for you?

Juan: “Shut up and leave me alone”

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Who has the ball?

Ms.Glenda: You seem angry. You were hoping you could play longer. It is hard to stop and clean up. You can handle this. Juan, breathe with me.

Juan: “I wanted to keep building”

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Ms.Glenda:You worked hard to build your tower. It’s hard to stop. You can do it. You have a choice. You can start with the blue blocks or the pink ones. Which would help you get started?

Juan: “The blue ones”

Ms.Glenda: “There you go. You are doing it. Good for you”

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Conscious Discipline: 5 step process

Becoming aware that something has triggered an emotion.

Breathing deeply and noticing our emotions.

Accurately identifying and naming our emotions.

Befriending the feeling through acceptance.

Awareness is the key to regulation.

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CASEL

The abilities to manage one’s emotions, thoughts, and behaviors effectively in different situations and to achieve goals and aspirations.

  • Impulse control
  • Delay gratification
  • Stress management
  • Self-discipline
  • Self-motivation
  • Goal setting
  • Organizational skills

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Feeling Brain vs Thinking Brain

The feeling brain will let you know when something doesn't feel right, but the thinking brain will make sure you respond in a healthy way, and that things (and you) don't get out of control.

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Feeling Brain vs Thinking Brain

Kids live mostly in their FEELING BRAIN

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Gardens - 3 minutes

Take 3 minutes to draw a garden with at least 6 flowers and room for more!

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Be PROACTIVE with your students!

Being able to stop and calm down when one is upset (self-management), requires skills like recognizing and labeling the emotions and the cognitive flexibility to consider how they might be affecting one's behavior choices (self-awareness).

What do we usually do when we teach something new?

  • Explain
  • Model
  • Practice
  • Give feedback
  • Practice some more
  • I do….we do…you do

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What is ANGER anyway?

Behind ANGER is always, always, always FEAR

Kindra’s Example: traffic

Grace’s Example: student refusal

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Physical Activity + Cognitive Flexibility

Physical activity is association with the activation of the prefrontal cortex, the same part of the brain responsible for self-regulatory behaviors!

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Be PROACTIVE with your students!

You can…

  • Use the feeling buddies
  • Have an interactive “how do I feel chart”
  • Role play
  • Discuss real things that happen
  • Use books
  • Model

Example: “I just finished eating my lunch and Ms. Wendy notified me that there was Chick-Fil-A in the teacher’s lounge that sounded better than my lunch so I was really disappointed.”

  • If you were me, how might your heart feel?
  • How would your face look?
  • How would your body look?

How will you be proactive?

Link up with 2 people and share!

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What about the BIG meltdowns?

DISTRACT…activate the thinking brain

  • “Uh oh! I just remembered I forgot to let my dog out to potty this morning!”

PEAK INTERESTS…give an alternative focus

  • “I saw your sister today and….”

SEEK HELP…give an opportunity to engage in something positive

  • “I need help looking for a book. You’re good at finding things”
  • “Can you check if the bathroom has toilet paper?”

BASIC NEEDS…eliminate barriers

  • “Let’s both go get some fresh water”

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What about the BIG meltdowns?

How do the kids feel?

  • Shame
  • Vulnerable
  • Seen at their worst
  • Exhausted

What can you do for kids to recognize, honor, and help?

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Other ideas

DEEP PRESSURE

Arm hugs (popsicle stick with a photo so a student can ask for one)

HEAVY WORKS

Wall push-ups

DISTRACTION

Write the room

CENTERING

Rainbow writing

Breathing exercises spinner

Grounding exercises list

RELEASE

Trash can

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Other ideas

LIGHTS OUT

Set a timer; community

BAND AID

Empathy; recognition

FRIEND HELPER

Rub back; write an “I care” note

AN OUT

“You’re not in trouble, I know you didn’t mean to yell at me”

REASSURANCE

“I still love you.”

“I’m here to help you”