Writing effective analysis
Purpose: you want to borrow $50.00
Do you make different choices depending on your audience?
Your kid brother
Your grandparents
Before you begin writing your essay, repeat these words
“To effectively analyze rhetoric, I must explain how these choices achieve the speaker’s purpose. To do this well, I must consider the audience. I must explain why these choices matter to the audience. The more specific I can be with who the audience is and how that affects the choices, the better.”
Live it.
Love it.
Memorize it.
Make it your first tattoo.
Read the blurb and assess the rhetorical situation. Then read the speech and pick what you consider to be three of the most important choices.
“In order to motivate his team of high school boys to perform better in the second half, Coach Smith calls out all the mistakes from the first half, declares consequences for continued poor performance, and sets expectations for the team’s performance in the second half.”
-Notice that thesis is made of strong rhetorical verbs, meaning verbs that must involve the audience.
-Notice also that thesis progresses chronologically through the speech. This makes the transitions in the body paragraphs much more cohesive.
Body Paragraph 1
Coach Smith begins his talk to the students by harshly cataloguing the mistakes that were made during the first half. He compares the high schoolers hustle unfavorably to “middle schoolers in PE class” and goes so far as to say that his own grandmother could “play better defense than you.” Coach Smith’s use of hyperbole to express disgust would appeal to the team’s sense of shame, as high school boys on a varsity basketball team take pride in their abilities, and most likely would motivate them to improve in the second half to outperform such a low standard of play. Coach Smith begins his speech with the phrase “In all my years of coaching,” which serves to establish his authority on the matter. Indeed, his extensive experience in coaching makes his commentary that much more stinging to his team. The high schoolers would not be happy that they are playing at such a historic low for the coach. After hearing all their mistakes outlined, they would most likely be inspired to rise above this low standard.
-notice the lovingly set-up quotes, which are not just dropped into the essay without any context.
-Notice the amount of analysis. That’s what should make up the majority of your body paragraphs.
The analysis is effective because it thoroughly connects the choices to the purpose.
Body paragraph 2
After establishing the poor play by the team, Coach Smith raises the stakes for the students by declaring that there will be consequences if it continues. For the seniors, he questions whether they really want this to be “their legacy”. For the underclassmen, he declares that none of them will be invited back if this sloppy play continues. In both instances, Smith is appealing to the pride and fear of the players. The seniors would not want a tarnished end to their time on the team. The underclassmen would be terrified to not have a spot on the varsity squad. Because Coach has already identified their poor play as the cause of these actions, there is no confusion as to the reason for these consequences, and the members of the team have no one to blame but themselves, inspiring them to raise their level of play in the second half to avoid these dire consequences.
-notice the cohesion of that transition at the beginning of the paragraph.
-notice also that the analysis reference ideas from the prior paragraph, to help create further cohesion. (“Because Coach has already identified their poor play as the cause of these actions...”)
Body paragraph 3
After spending much of his speech breaking down his team, Coach Smith builds them up at the conclusion, setting clear expectations to further motivate the team to do well in the second half. His tone now shifts from fiery to proud, reminding the team that “we’ve beaten them before in the regular season” and declares that “they’re no more talented than you.” Again, Smith’s decade of coaching experience gives him authority to declare that all is not lost, which would help calm and fortify the resolve of the team. By setting expectations of “aggressive defence”, “good passing,” and “communication”, Coach does not leave it to the students’ imagination to figure out how to satisfy their leader. And again, because he has listed his expectations, there is no confusion for these frustrated teenagers as to what must be done. The coach’s speech, which spent so much time marked with anger and frustration, concludes with a path to redemption for the team: play better in the second half by implementing these instructions.
Audience audience audience audience
Conclusion
It’s difficult to motivate a team that’s losing, and every coach has a different relationship with his or her team. Coach Smith used his authority as a coach with ten year’s experience to build a pep-talk for his team that breaks them down in order to build them up, with an ultimate goal of performing better in the second half and winning the game.