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Be There — Golden Rule #5: Connect to Help

Home > Resources > Be There For Others Unit Plan > Lesson Plan 5

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Let’s Review!

What is Golden Rule #1?

What is Golden Rule #2?

What is Golden Rule #3?

What is Golden Rule #4?

What are some of the key elements of Golden Rule #4?

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Golden Rule #5: Connect to Help

What questions or comments do you have?

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Golden Rule #5: Connect to Help

How can I support someone to get the help they need and deserve?

What if I’m worried about someone but they don’t want to get help?

In this lesson you’ll learn how to…

help someone access professional and community resources, what to expect from them, and how to overcome barriers like cost, time and availability.

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A Word From Max

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Connect to Help

An important part of being there for someone is helping them access professional and community resources and services.

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What resources are you aware of that you could share with someone who is struggling with their mental health?

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Remember!

You can’t (and shouldn’t) force them to go, but you can help them know where to go and what to expect.

As a friend, your role is to support them in finding resources and getting help.
You can prepare for conversations and do research on your own, but the process of getting help is best done together. Ask how you can support them in getting help.

For example:

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Do you want me to come to the Guidance Office with you?

Would you feel more comfortable if I was there when you call to make an appointment?

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Where to Go

Figuring out where to find help can be hard. Check out Kids Help Phone Resources Around Me, and if there aren't appropriate services in your area (or if wait times are too long), then look to online resources or helplines.

If possible, get on a waitlist for professional services, but you can also reach out to a caring person in your community that you trust.
Sometimes it’s just trial and error of different resources like online chats, group counselling, or helplines before finding a good fit.

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The important thing is to not give up.

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While resources in your area might not be as plentiful and accessible as they should be, it’s important to:

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look into all options

try different approaches to find what will best suit their needs

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When to Get Help

The earlier the better.

If you see someone is struggling to cope, you should suggest they reach out to community supports or professional help.
Let them know that there are people they can talk to who can help (like a school counsellor, elder, family doctor, or helpline), and that they don’t have to go through this alone.
By encouraging and supporting someone to get the help they need, we normalize help seeking behaviour.

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Practical Examples

You can say, "It sounds like you’ve really been struggling; have you considered talking to our school counsellor?"

Offer to go with them to a counsellor or sit with them while they call a helpline.

Find ways to help remove barriers to accessing services like distance, time, and cost.

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Common Barriers and Potential Solutions

What are some possible solutions to overcoming the following barriers?

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Distance

Time

Cost

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Keep Following Up

If they refuse help, but are not in crisis, follow up periodically and encourage them to get help.

It’s a balance. Pushing too hard will only push them further away, but if you’re worried about them, they probably could use some support.

Give them space, but check in from time to time and keep an eye out for warning signs.

If you see something that worries you, say what you see and hear them out. Similarly, know the signs of crisis and, if present, immediately connect them to help.
If they're in crisis, call 9-1-1 or emergency services.

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What to Expect From Therapy

Each person’s experience with mental health care services will be different.

There are dozens of types of therapy and every therapist has their own personality and their own style of therapy, so it’s important to find the right fit.
If someone doesn’t ‘click’ with the first therapist they see, that’s ok. Totally normal.
Encourage them to keep trying to find someone they’re comfortable with.

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The first therapy session usually goes one of two ways:

Therapy requires a lot of vulnerability, and often someone’s first (or every!) therapy session is really hard.
They might not feel so great coming out of it and could use a friend to be there for them.

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therapist and patient ask each other questions to get to know each other, build trust and assess whether it’s a good fit

dive right into the reason they’re at therapy, and then see at the end of the session whether it’s a good fit.

or

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Ways to Support a Friend in Therapy

Before:

Encourage your friend to write down the questions they want to ask their therapist. Help your friend look at their schedule and figure out how often they can go to therapy. Can they commit to once a week? Twice a month? What time slots might work?

During:

Wait in the car, wait in the waiting room, or go in with them. Whatever they want and you’re comfortable with.

After:

Ask them how it went. Listen carefully to what they liked about the therapist and what they didn’t like. If it didn’t go well, gently encourage them to try again or offer to help them find a different therapist. Don’t push too hard, but follow up in a of couple weeks.

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Activity: Where to Go, What to Say

Handout 2: Where to go, What to say

Follow the directions on the handout to determine people who could support your friend, places you could go to for support, as well as what you could say to a friend to encourage them to accept professional support.

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Activity: A Closer Look

A Closer Look

T'áncháy and Lindsay
Maryam and Aswani
Kirbie and Estyr

All three of these stories look at experiences and barriers to mental health supports specific to an individual’s culture and/or identity.

As you watch, pay attention to these unique experiences as well as examples of how Golden Rule #5: Connect to Help appears.

After watching all three stories, you will be taking a closer look at one of the stories. You will be provided with transcripts of the videos to refer back to when we are done watching.

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T'áncháy and Lindsay

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Maryam and Aswani

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Kirbie and Estyr

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Let’s Discuss!

Handout 3: A Closer Look

Story 1: T'áncháy and Lindsay
Story 2: Maryam and Aswani
Story 3: Kirbie and Estyr

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