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Defining Empathy: �A Way of Being �for a Better World�

Session 1: Presentation�Module 2: 7 Week Training�Version 2

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Presentation

Defining Empathy �A Way of Being Model

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The Problem

“It seems like we got an empathy shortage, an empathy deficit. More serious than the federal

budget deficit.

We've become so cynical that it almost seems naive to believe that we can understand each other across the gulf of race, or class or region or religion...”�— Barack Obama

Let’s start with the problem of an Empathy Deficit we are facing in world

Barack Obama states our current social problems well. �He says.

“It seems like we got an empathy shortage, an empathy deficit. More serious than the federal budget deficit.

We've become so cynical that it almost seems naive to believe that we can understand each other across the gulf of race, or class or region or religion...” — Barack Obama

Seems to me, the empathy deficit has gotten worse since Barack Obama mentioned this.�This definition project is needed because.

We need a more empathic society and culture to address our personal and societal needs.
We need to build a movement to do this
We need a clear definitions to work with so we are talking about the same thing.
We need to be clear on what we mean by empathy and be able to understand what others mean by empathy.

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What Do We Mean by Empathy?

It is confusing with many definitions

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Back to the Being, 1870’s feeling into a work of art.

German: Einfühlung (in - feeling)
Translated to Em - pathy (in - feeling)

A Studio at Les Batignolles, Henri Fantin-Latour, 1870

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History in Super Brief;

Started in Art Aesthetics, German: Einfühlung � (in - feeling)
Used in Psychology : Feeling into the experience of people.
Translated to English: Em - pathy (in - feeling)
Word have changed over time and has been defined and redefined again and again.
Different people and academic disciplines define the term differently.

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Our Definition Is Based On

The Work Of

Carl Rogers�1902 – 1987

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Empathy is a Way of Being

“An empathic way of being with another person has several facets. It means entering the private perceptual world of the other and becoming thoroughly at home in it.

It involves being sensitive, moment by moment, to the

changing felt meanings which flow in this other person, to the fear or rage or tenderness or confusion or whatever that he or she is experiencing.” �— Carl Rogers

In 1975 Carl wrote a paper on Empathy entitled

Empathic: An Unappreciated Way of Being,

He consolidated a lot of his understanding of empathy in the context of a therapist and client relationship.�He also referred to empathy in a broader relational terms as well.

Here is a quote.

“An empathic way of being with another person has several facets.

It means entering the private perceptual world of the other and becoming thoroughly at home in it.

It involves being sensitive, moment by moment, to the changing felt meanings which flow in

this other person, to the fear or rage

or tenderness or confusion or

whatever that he or she� is experiencing.” �— Carl Rogers

Here he references an empathic way of being and that it has several facets. �This will paper will be assigned reading for the Session 2.�

This is the core and foundation that our definition of Empathy as a Multifaceted Way of Being in the course is based on.

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Empathy: A Way of Being

Empathy is a Way of Being in relationship with life. It is feeling and sensing into life with presence, deep listening, openness, 'a sense of self', curiosity and care.

It is being sensitive to felt experiences and meanings in oneself, others, relationships and our common humanity.

This compares, for example, to Ways of Being that are judgmental, indifferent, detached, domineering, cynical, overly analytical, self-centered, etc.

Like a diamond, this Way of Being is multi faceted.

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Empathy is a Way of Being�Like a Diamond, This Way of Being �Has Many Facets

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What is a �Way of Being?

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Some Facets of �Empathy as a Way of Being

Other Empathy - Feeling/Sensing into Others
Self-Empathy - Feeling/Sensing into Self
Imaginative Empathy - Feeling/Sensing through our Imagination
Relational Empathy - Awareness of the quality of mutual empathy in relationships.
Many more facets can be described.

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We demonstrate the definition in the �experience of the Empathy Circle.

Definition

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Carl Rogers Developed the

Active Listening Process

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Review: How to Empathy Circle

Speaker

Active Listener

Silent Listener

Just to Review.

�In the Empathy Circle we use the Empathic Listening process in a group of 2 to 7 participants, with 4 being an ideal number.

The speaker selects their active listener and speaks about the topic provided or about what is alive for them.

The speaker shares an idea of 2 and then pauses and the active listener reflects their understanding of what the speaker said. The goal is for the speaker to feel heard and understood to their satisfaction.

This is the same as Rogers did in his counseling process. The difference is that there were no silent listeners in the room. Rogers would just do this one way listening for a hour long therapy session.

In the empathy circle we take turns being the speaker, active listener and silent listeners. We also have timed turns so that each participant has a chance to take part in all the roles.

Once the speakers time us up, the Active Listener become the Speaker and Selects their Active Listener

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Review How to Empathy Circle

Speaker

Active Listener

Silent Listener

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Review How to Empathy Circle

Speaker

Active Listener

Silent Listener

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Facet 1: Empathy �Other Oriented Empathy

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Empathizing With Others�by Listening

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We Empathize by Sensing Into �and Listening

Mother and Child, Mary Cassatt

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What

are

they

feeling?

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Empathy In the Empathy Circle

Speaker

Active Listener

Silent Listener

Active Listener feels and� senses into the experience� of the speaker

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Empathy Tent �@ Downtown Berkeley - Test Your Empathy

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Take the Empathy Test

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What best describes what this person is feeling?

( ) hateful

( ) jealous

( ) arrogant

( ) panicked

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What best describes what this person is feeling?

( ) playful

( ) comforting

( ) irritated

( ) bored

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What best describes what this person is feeling?

( ) convinced

( ) joking

( ) desire

( ) bored

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( ) Surprise

( ) Interest

( ) Happiness

( ) Pain

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( ) Sadness

( ) Pain

( ) Anger

( ) Disgust

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Feel the Yawn Empathy Test

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Feel the Yawn

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Feel the Yawn

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Feel the Yawn

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Facet 2: Self-Empathy

Feeling/Sensing into Self

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“Being listened to by someone who understands makes it possible for persons to listen more accurately to themselves, with greater empathy toward their own visceral experiencing, their own vaguely felt meanings.” ~ Carl Rogers

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Self-Empathy by Being Listened To

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Self-Empathy:

How do YOU feel now?

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Self Empathy: Sensing Into Your Body

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Self Empathy in the Empathy Circle

Silent Listener

Self Empathy is the �Speaker sensing �into their own feelings.

Speaker

Active Listener

Silent Listener

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Facet 3: Imaginative Empathy

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Imaginative Empathy

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Imaginative Empathy in the Empathy Circle

Speaker

Active Listener

Silent Listener

Participants Can �Do Imaginative

Role Plays

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Imaginative Empathy in the Empathy Circle

Speaker

Active Listener

Silent Listener

Imaginative

Role Plays

Creativity

Pain

Judgement

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Imaginative Empathy�We Can Feel Into Any Role and Perspective

“I've thought a lot about the power of empathy. In my work, it's the current that connects me and my actual pulse to a fictional character in a made up story, it allows me to feel, pretend feelings and sorrows and imagined pain.” Meryl Streep

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Imaginative Empathy �Designer Patricia Moore, Role Playing the Elderly

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Facet 4: Relational Empathy

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Empathy Circle

Speaker

Empathizer

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Empathy Circle

Relational Empathy Between 2 People

Speaker

Empathizer

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Relational Empathy

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Low Relational Empathy

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Relational Empathy

Participant

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Relational Empathy

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Other Facets

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Blocks to Empathy

Sympathy

etc. etc.

Detachment

Judgement

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Contrasting Other �Definition Models of Empathy

Affective/Cognitive

Way of Being

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The End