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How YOU Doin’?

Dealing with the Hidden Challenges of Anger, Burnout, Anxiety and Depression

Jane Detweiler-Sutliffe, MA, LPC

Whitney Counseling, Holland, MI

The Truism Center, Grand Rapids, MI

MSBOA Emeritus (Wyoming HS/JHS), ASBDA, MMEA

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This is the topic no one wants to talk about. This job is slowly killing teachers because from the moment we start until the moment we retire, we just keep putting rocks in our backpacks.

TODAY…rocks come out.

The truth.

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By a show of hands…or not…

Who has ripped into students during the past month?
Had paralyzing fear- of parents, students, administers, your own mistakes?
Who has secretly given up?
Who has secretly wanted to die in the last year?

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THINGS CAN GET BETTER

Fear won’t always sit in the driver’s seat.

I can figure out this anger before it makes me lose my job or have a heart attack.

No job is worth my life.

I will care again one day.

WE’RE GOING TO TALK ABOUT THE REAL STUFF

and WHAT WILL MAKE IT BETTER… NOW.

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The #1 Difficulty of Directors is Burnout.

Burnout is another way of saying my Anxiety, Depression, and Anger have gotten SO bad that the ONLY thing I can do is to LITERALLY disassociate. (REALLY BAD)

IF YOU ARE BURNED OUT, YOU ARE EXPERIENCING ANGER, ANXIETY, DEPRESSION, OR ALL THREE

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Let’s fix things.

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That your group won’t be ready for a concert
That you aren’t good enough to do this work
That you will miss out on the best years of your kids’ lives
That you made a mistake going into education
That even though you are exhausted, there is not enough time in the day to achieve quality results

Anxiety is all about Worry

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3 Levels of Coping Strategies

Low Level - DO THESE EVERY DAY to keep you in healthy space

Medium Level - When your mind is racing

High Level - When you feel out of control

ONE set of coping strategies for:

Anxiety

Depression

Anger

Burnout

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Low Level Strategies

Deep Breathing
Talk Back to the Self Critic
Add Sensory
Add the Arts

Tip

Do many LITTLE things that make you feel good every day so that you create extra energy that you will want to give away.

Story for illustration purposes only

Visual Arts
Music
Dance
Theatre

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THE SELF CRITIC can destroy who we are and what we do.

TIP: Once you begin to see how loud your self critic is, you will recognize it in your ensembles, creating confidence for not only you, but also your students.

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Adding Sensory

Sights
Sounds
Smell
Taste
Touch

Adding the Arts

Visual Arts
Music
Dance
Theatre

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Medium Level Coping Strategies

(Mind is Racing!)

5 Senses exercise
Count backwards from 100 by 3s
Ask yourself a question you have to think about.

Tip

After you ground yourself, chase these coping strategies with LOW level coping skills (such as talking back to the self critic, looking for beauty, or deep breathing with your class.)

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High Level Strategies

T - TEMPERTURE

I - INTENSE EXERCISE

P - PACED BREATHING

Tip

If you find yourself close to an angry outburst you might regret, panic attack, or desire to quit, don’t be afraid to take a break during rehearsal to do these things. Chase them with Med. and Low level skills.

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When yelling or raising your voice is normal
Saying things like “Whatever”, or “I can’t care anymore.”
Small mouth, clenched jaw
Breaking things when you are by yourself or in public.
Saying clearly unkind or cruel things
Zoning out
Criticizing yourself internally
Thinking of kids as “cancer” or “toxic”
Body pain as a result of tension
Headaches

Anger

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Thermometer of Anger, Anxiety, or Panic

9 - Verbally out of control, saying unkind things with no regard to someone’s feelings.

7 - Brain decides, “I can’t handle this”

5 - Frustration, shame, or fear sets in

3 - Try to solve the problem

1 - Calm space

10 - Intense feelings, completely out of control physically, breaking things, throwing things

8 - Beginning to panic, or be out of control

6 - Mind is racing, anxiety, anger, or panic increases

4 - Push back from parents, students, administration, or self

2 - Someone complains, criticizes, interrupts, or in some way takes away your peace

High

Medium

Low

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Moving more slowly
Rarely inspired, no longer enjoying what used to be exciting
Every day is a struggle to get up
Wasting large amounts of time on distractions
Wanting to close your eyes and not wake up
Uncontrollable crying
Sleeping too much or not enough
Irritable and easily angered
Disengaging with students
Feeling numb

Depression

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Know Your Depression Level

Level I - Just do one thing

Level 2 - 2 minute timer

Level 3 - 5 minute timer

Level 4 - 10 minute timer

Level 5 - 15 minute timer

Repeat as desired

You are now ready to face the world again

Tip

Where are you?

When setting your timer, pick a project that will make the greatest difference and possibly inspire you to do the next thing.

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Sleep Cycles - Getting the Most Out of Your Sleep

Sleep

Cycle

Power

Nap

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Ignoring your own needs
Ignoring your body’s signs
Ignoring your mental health
Ignoring makes things bigger…

Burnout

TOTAL BEHAVIOR

Thoughts

Emotions

Physiology

Actions

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Polyvagal Theory- Window of Tolerance

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You need a place at the table…

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Curiosity creates Inspiration

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Understand Your Students’ Ways of Seeing the World

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LEVELS OF MUSICIANSHIP

Band students strive to move through five levels of musicianship throughout each concert cycle. Students are expected to have Level I accomplished by the end of the 2^nd week of a concert cycle through at home practice. All students are expected to reach a minimum of Level 3 by each concert. The top players in each group will consistently be striving for levels IV and V, having accomplished levels I, II and III. The following defines each level:

Level I Working on notes and rhythms

Level II Working on dynamics, basic phrasing, accents, articulation markings, style, and anything else on the page

Level III Working for rhythmic stability by using a metronome and working on intonation using a tuner.

Level IV Working on musical nuance and thoughtful phrasing to make the music come to life.

Level V Listening to recordings and professional players regularly, generating original, creative, and musical ideas to share with colleagues during the rehearsal.

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Reach out…everyone needs help sometimes

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You are not alone! Please feel free to reach out: