How (Not) To Third Wheel Lestappen
From the desk of George William Russell
How it started
The ✨Inchident✨
✨The Inchident video✨
The gremlins in question
Look at them
Insufferable
Even more insufferable
What the hell is going on
with Charles’ hair?
You know who was not an insufferable child?
This guy
What a handsome boy
Such a distinguished young man
NOT a distinguished�young man
Bloody adorable!
But, I digress:
Post ✨ Inchident ✨
This is the child they let into Formula 1:
Just let that sink in for a minute.
Once you have recovered, you can move to the next slide.
The red flag everyone apparently missed
I mean, seriously, how did we not see it?
It was right in front of our eyes the whole time.
The beginning of the end, for the entire F1 grid
Are you trying to tell me this child is 21 at the time of this photo? Christ.
Max and Charles in 2018:
Seriously, what is this?!
Lewis was the very first victim of Lestappen third wheeling, and he didn’t even know it.
2018 summary
The highlight of 2019
This handsome bugger makes his F1 debut.
You’re welcome for those.
Okay, moving on….
Lestappen in 2019
2019 was quite the year in terms of Lestappen. This was the year they were truly beginning to show just how unhinged they have always been about each other.
I’m not going to try to explain it, because a picture says more than a thousand words ever could.
I apologize in advance.
?
??
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????
(No, I’m not paying to get these photos without a watermark.)�(Update: Got the photos without a watermark. Thanks to my anonymous donor.)
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Couples who judge together, stay together.
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Once again, Lewis is suffering. He is the original Lestappen third wheel.
I could go on forever, but you get the point.
However, there was a period in 2019 in which it seemed like these two might not make it.
I am, of course, talking about the 2019 Austrian Grand Prix.
Also known as the race weekend that almost killed Lestappen once and for all.
(Since you’re reading this, I assume you already know that did not actually turn out to be the case.)
2019 Austrian Grand Prix: A brief summary, part 1
Get ready for the most uncomfortable watch of your life.
If looks could kill, Max would be dead ten times over.
2019 Austrian Grand Prix: A brief summary, part 2
You would think something like this would ruin whatever it was they had going on prior to June 30th, 2019, right?
Wrong.
Almost 3 months later, at the 2019 Singapore Grand Prix, this embarrassing moment took place:
Max, knower of all things geography and vexillology, asks Charles if the Singapore flag is the Monaco flag.
Fast forward to the 2019 Abu Dhabi Grand Prix, and we get this terrible attempt at a hug:
I’m not including the video because watching it makes me cringe.
To reiterate my previous point: ?????????
(Still not paying to get the photos without a watermark.)
(Update: Got the photos without a watermark.)
2019 was a difficult year for Lewis, especially.
(Don’t let his beautiful smile fool you.)
Which brings us to 2020: A summary
Here they are, discussing their crash like adults.
Unlike poor Esteban.
2021
2021 Monaco Grand Prix: A summary
Completely normal behavior
(Not.)
Christ. Get a room.
This fucker doesn’t know
he’s about to get a
DNS tomorrow.
2021 Azerbaijan Grand Prix: A summary
Despite 2021 being a Lestappen-free top 3 season, that didn’t stop them from being weird about each other.
That’s some intense eye contact. And why are they so close????
Social distancing who?
Charles???
Mirroring is apparently a love language.
In conclusion, 2021 was a beautiful, peaceful season for the rest of the grid.
But little did we know that a storm was brewing.
None of us could have been prepared for what 2022 would bring.
2022: Lestappen hell
Max interrupting Charles mid-interview, and Charles letting him??
?
??
???
????
So many of us suffered at their hands in 2022
Can you believe Checo used to not be traumatized by them?
Checo had an especially rough season in 2022
I mean, seriously.
Carlos
Lando
Even the most beautiful of us suffered
I even had to suffer outside of races and qualifying sessions
I make pain look beautiful, though, don’t I?
But nobody, and I mean nobody, suffered more than Sir Lewis Hamilton did after the 2022 Austrian Grand Prix.
Which brings us to the creation of the Surviving Being Top 3 with Lestappen group chat.
Go to the next slides at your own risk.
(Just kidding, you have no choice.)
2022 Austrian Grand Prix
I can’t believe I’m saying this, but the video doesn’t even do the podium justice. Because what the actual hell?!
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Oh yeah, Lewis was there too.
This is the full podium, in case you forgot that the world exists outside of Lestappen
2022 Austrian Grand Prix podium celebrations: The aftermath
We all watched the scenes on the podium unfold, but there is something truly unsettling about having to be up there on the podium with them as it happened.
When Lewis returned to the garage after the celebrations, he had a haunted look in his eyes. He was staring off into the distance, and upon trying to obtain contact with him, he would look straight through me. Like I wasn’t there. Like he was reliving the horrors of that podium, over and over and over again.
That is when I decided that enough was enough. I was not about to let myself suffer the same fate as my teammate, nor did I want anyone else to have to be, as Lewis put it, made into an involuntary voyeur.
The creation of the group chat
The group chat Surviving Being Top 3 With Lestappen was created on Sunday, June 10th, 2022.
And because you are currently reading this very well made, thorough PowerPoint, that means that you are a member of this group chat.
The group chat was made with one goal in mind: to help other drivers on the grid, experienced or rookies, be able to deal with Max and Charles should they ever be unfortunate enough to end up in a top 3 position with them.
Here are some tips you can try should you find yourself being top 3 with Max and Charles, shared by drivers who have already been in your position:
Cont.
Cont.
Planet Carlos
A true and trusted method of dealing with being top three with Max and Charles is the go-to method of Carlos Sainz. Here, Carlos zones out and dissociates to the point where it might look as if he has taken part in some interplanetary travel.
When he does this, he goes to his safe space, which has been titled Planet Carlos.
Planet Carlos is a safe space that is open to all F1 drivers, and will welcome you with open arms should you ever be in a position where you need to make a mental trip there during a race weekend.
Please consult Carlos for more details should you need them.
Although going to Planet Carlos looks different for everyone, this is how it can transpire:
Use the group chat frequently!
It is very important that we all use the group chat frequently, so we can share our experiences, tips and tricks with our fellow drivers.
Remember, the whole point of this group chat is to help each other, and make sure that not a single one of us is forced to suffer the trauma that Lewis had to suffer through in Austria in 2022.
Nobody deserves that.
Please respect your fellow drivers and the group chat.
Together, we can survive the age of Lestappen.
This used to be the final slide of this presentation, but things have occurred since its creation that require more slides.
I have therefore decided that this presentation will be updated whenever needed, at the end of each season, so we can all learn from each other’s success and failures.
Godspeed.
2023: A summary
2023 São Paulo Grand Prix
He might look calm, collected and happy, but don’t let his face fool you. Lance was panicking in the group chat prior to this photo being taken.
2023 São Paulo Grand Prix, cont.
Due to the storm, post-qualifying interviews and photo up were being conducted inside the FIA garage. And it was… Something..
I will let you watch that whole debacle and see for yourself.
Lance, Lance, Lance…
This could all have been avoided had you paid attention to the group chat.
THIS is why the group chat exists.
Don’t make the same mistakes Lance made.
Pay attention to the group chat. Use the group chat.
Don’t be like Lance.
(Sorry, Lance.)
But don’t worry, 2023 gets worse.
Presenting: The 2023 Las Vegas Grand Prix.
Vegas was on a different level, and it all started on Thursday, when we for some reason got a joint Lestappen interview in the TV pen.
Seriously, what the fuck is this?
2023 Las Vegas Grand Prix, cont.
On Saturday, Carlos qualifies P2 with Charles and Max P1 and P3, respectively.
But Carlos is experienced, and despite Max and Charles taking their insufferability up about ten notches, Carlos handled it the way he does best: by going to Planet Carlos.
Why are those two standing so close to each other????
Carlos got a front row seat to this moment:
This cannot be repeated enough:
When in doubt, go to Planet Carlos.
But the biggest victim of the Las Vegas weekend was Checo.
A short summary:
The actual short summary:
Enjoy, or whatever, part 1:
Has anyone noticed how if anyone else is top 3 with Max and they stand in the wrong spot for photos, he’ll ask them to move? But when it’s Charles, it’s fine, even if Charles is standing in Max’s P1 spot?
Enjoy, or whatever, part 2:
Enjoy, or whatever, part 3:
Enjoy, or whatever, part 4:
Enjoy, or whatever, part 5:
Here Checo thought he had made an excellent choice by putting himself in the middle seat, hoping it would keep them from being insufferable.
(Spoiler alert: It did not.)
Realizing his massive mistake:
Enjoy, or whatever, part 6:
Enjoy, or whatever, part 7:
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The royal couple(?) and their friend, Checo?
2023 Las Vegas Grand Prix: The aftermath.
None of us understand how Checo survived the post-race shenanigans of the 2023 Las Vegas Grand Prix. But he did.
I wouldn’t have. Well done, Checo.
Presenting:
The 2023 Abu Dhabi Grand Prix race weekend.
2023 Abu Dhabi Grand Prix Thursday press conference
I repeat, and I cannot stress this enough: ???????????????????
I don’t care how good the dick is, no man is this funny.
Finishing on a high!
But, despite the amount of suffering that was brought thanks to Max and Charles throughout the 2023 season, there was also a very notable highlight at the very end.
And given how I do not wish to finish this presentation with the horrors that occurred in Las Vegas and at the Abu Dhabi Thursday press conference, I would like to thank the legendary Oscar Piastri, who not only joined the Lestappen third wheel club in Abu Dhabi in 2023, but who handled the two of them beautifully on his very first attempt.
2023 Abu Dhabi Grand Prix qualifying
Look at how pleased he is with himself, as he should be.
A legend among men, truly.
And that concludes the 2023 Formula 1 season.
Oh, how I wish I could say 2023 was the end of it, and this presentation has not needed an update since.
However, that is of course not the case because Max and Charles are still both actively racing in F1 and because of that, our collective suffering continues.
Brace yourselves for 2024.
2024: A summary
Presenting: The qualifying session for the first race of the 2024 season, Bahrain Grand Prix
Look at that side profile.
They are blown away by my beauty, effectively distracting them from each other:
But sadly, not even I am able to make them remember to leave space for Jesus:
Seriously, is this
really necessary?
At this moment, I think it’s important to remind us all of one thing:
No matter how beautiful or skilled you are — no matter how confident you might be that you can be the one person who successfully manages to make Max and Charles behave as if there are other people in the world who exists outside of their little bubble — you are wrong.
They will always find a way to be blatantly obsessed with and weird about each other.
Always.
Seriously.
Could Charles be any less subtle?
Literally Charles:
😍😍😍
Also, allow me to reiterate my point about Max’s outright refusal to let anyone stand in the wrong spot for photos after a qualifying session or a race. �Unless, of course, that person is Charles Leclerc.
2024 Saudi Arabia Grand Prix
Max interrupting Charles mid-sentence to remind him that one of his favourite tracks is Monaco:
His words say “Yes, Monaco”,
but his tone and expression
says “Yes, dear”
And don’t let Checo’s brave smile on the podium fool you: He is in pain.
2024 Miami Grand Prix, a.k.a. Lando’s first F1 win
If you win your first ever F1 race, and Max and Charles share the podium with you, they’ll be too happy for you to focus on each other!
(Instead, they’ll try to murder you by drowning you with champagne, but hey, it could be a million times worse.)
Being forced to third wheel Lestappen < Lestappen trying to drown you
Just ask Lando.
2024 Imola Grand Prix
2024 Monaco Grand Prix
2024 Belgian Grand Prix
2024 Dutch Grand Prix
Proceed to the next slide at your own risk.
What we learned from this podium:
2024 Austin Grand Prix (COTA)
My only complaint for Carlos from this podium was this moment, in which Max and Charles somehow managed to sneak in a yap session:
But alas, we can’t all be perfect.
(No, we are not going to talk about how my race went.)
2024 Qatar Grand Prix
Oscar was literally speaking throughout this entire moment.
And with that traumatizing press conference, the 2024 season came to an end without any further Lestappen top 3 third-wheeling moments.
In conclusion:
Due to the ridiculousness of the 2025 Belgian Grand Prix Sprint Race, you are getting one (1) mid-season update. You will not be getting any more presentation updates until this season has concluded.
Because apparently, the power of the menacing pairing that is Lestappen has reached levels that extend even beyond top 3 moments during actual qualis, sprints and races. They have clearly developed the ability to communicate telepathically while out on track, because what in the actual hell was this synchronized overtake on the McLarens:
Seriously, what kind of soulmate-nonsense is this?!
Unacceptable.
And that concludes my presentation!
(For now…)
No, we are still not talking about the 2023 Abu Dhabi race, nor what happened afterwards.