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Infidelity as an Opportunity for Transformation:

The RLT Perspective on Working With Affairs

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Why do we need a fresh approach to working with infidelity?

Infidelity as a springboard for transformation

The critical question when working with the Involved Partner

Understanding infidelity as a trauma for the Hurt Partner

New LIVE Course:

Trauma and Opportunity: The RLT Approach to Working With Infidelity

5 LIVE 90-minute classes with Q&A

Wednesday, February 22 Wednesday, March 1 Wednesday, March 8 Wednesday, March 15 Thursday, March 23	1-2:30pm ET 1-2:30pm ET 1-2:30pm ET 1-2:30pm ET 1-2:30pm ET

Class 1: An Overview of the RLT Approach to Infidelity

The RLT perspective on infidelity and how it differs from other models
The goals of treatment: using the crisis as a springboard for transformational change in the character of each partner and the essential character of the union itself
The 2 phases of treatment: containment and transformation
How to be the Wise Adult in the room: approaching infidelity issues from the center of health
How to deal with countertransference: managing your own feelings around infidelity
The importance of not imposing a model of fidelity on your clients
Identifying and disentangling from your own biases and assumptions about fidelity

Class 2: The Hurt Partner — Infidelity as a Trauma

Understanding infidelity as a trauma for the hurt partner: their basic assumptions about their partner and relationship have been shattered
Creating a platform for the hurt partner to deal with the trauma of betrayal and deceit
Exploring the 2 questions of hurt partners:

The question of disclosure: should everything be disclosed? How and when should it happen?
Reassuring behaviors: how to be the voice of what’s appropriate, moderate, and respectful
What ultimately helps hurt partners regain trust

Class 3: The Involved Partner: Understanding the Lack of “No”

Shifting the question from “why do people cheat?” to “why don’t they cheat?” — identifying what force has overridden the power of “no”
The 3 reasons behind the lack of ability to say “no” to infidelity:

Realistic remorse: the involved partner doesn’t need to regret the infidelity, but they must regret the consequences of their actions
The involved partner must begin with accountability, but not shame or self-attack

Class 4: Infidelity as an Opportunity for Transformation

The old relationship is over. The question now is: can we help our clients forge a new one?
Understanding how to use the crisis of infidelity as an opportunity for deeper transformation in the relationship
Moving beyond the victim/perpetrator framework into one that builds hope
Identifying the dysfunctional relational stances that contributed to the infidelity and how to address them
Shifting from what happened to understanding why it happened
Teaching each partner the relational skills for a stronger and healthier relationship:

Class 5: The Crisis is Over — Now What?

Teaching each partner the relational skills for a stronger and healthier relationship:

How to amplify each partner’s progress as they move towards true intimacy
Demarcating the crisis as having passed
Celebrating the new transformed relationship—perhaps it’s time to renew wedding vows

Enroll Now

Trauma and Opportunity-

The RLT Approach to Working With Infidelity

terryreal.com/infidelity

[$397 | 2x $227]