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🛠️ Self-editing

  • Help you think – and (re)write -- like an editor.
  • A 5-step system guaranteed to speed up your writing and improve it.
    • Enhance the quality of your writing by focusing on a few high-value things.
    • Tighten your content.

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🛠️ Revising and Editing

  • What do you think is the proportion of time you spend writing the first draft vs. editing?

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The Writer’s Lament

“I didn’t have time to write a short letter, so I wrote a long one instead.”

Variously attributed to: Blaise Pascal, John Locke, Benjamin Franklin, Henry David Thoreau, Cicero, Oscar Wilde, Woodrow Wilson, Mark Twain

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Your First Draft

Get everything in…”but the kitchen sink” approach

Don’t worry if it makes sense, or you have too much, too little, or things that need review/check sources.

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A (tiny) example of edited work

Publication: New York Times Modern Love Tiny Love Stories

First draft

Title: A Horse Affair

 

 

We stood tall (though she stood much taller), with our eyes locked and loaded. A true western-style standoff between me (amateur cowboy) and her horse. She was the only one that didn’t like me and I was going to make her like me. “It doesn’t have to be like this,” I thought. There were so many things I could teach her, open up to the ways I could feed her and take care of her. All I wanted was for her to be happy. But every time I reached my hands out she’d back away and huff. Fine. If you want to be like that, be like that. It wasn’t until I finally let go of my compulsion to be liked that she dipped her nose down, touched my hand, and sighed.

 

 

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Final (published)

Title: A Cowgirl and Her Horse

In a movie, a twangy guitar riff would’ve played. I was a long-time lone ranger grappling with debilitating social anxiety after moving across the world. She was a sandy-haired Palomino mare who became a therapist for traumatized veterans. The kicker was that she, herself, had previously suffered prolonged abuse, becoming averse to human touch. We stood tall, eyes locked and loaded. The more I wrangled for her to like me, the further she cantered away. Then, one night, I rested my forearms behind the fence, and she approached me, for the first time, dipping her nose to press my palm.

 

 

 

 

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🛠️ Professional editing in five steps

  • 🧠 Content
  • 🗂️ Structure
  • ✏️ Line
  • 🔍 Copy edit
  • Proofing

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Time Management

  • 5 stages?! Oh no. 1,2 & 3 are the time sinks.

Do you give equal time to each?

    • NO!
    • Your time allocation should depend entirely on your strengths/weaknesses.

This Photo by Unknown Author is licensed under CC BY-SA

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 �🧠1. Content �

Attuned to audience & purpose?

Focused on what’s likely to engage

Consistent voice and tone: Conversational!

Enough detail: show, don’t tell

Place for narrative: historic storyline, quote

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🧠 Content questions from the point of view of your audience

  • Is anything missing?
  • Is anything repetitive or irrelevant?
  • Do you have an appropriate and consistent tone?
  • Is there a good mix of detail/history/ narrative/facts/examples/data?
  • Is anything unclear? Don’t leave your reader with unanswered questions
  • Is all jargon explained?

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🗂️ 2. Structure! (Paragraph level)�

  • Have I buried interesting or important information? Put the exciting stuff first.
  • Is there a strong intro?
  • Does the order make logical sense?
  • Am I using effective transitions?
  • Could anything be cut without sacrificing quality? (Almost always, Yes!)
    • Stephen King’s 10%.

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  • Writing too much, explaining, adding intrusive commentary or more detail than needed – all problems I see every day as an editor. Less is better.”

--Toni Morrison

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Is your pace consistent?

Check the middle. That’s where most content bogs down.

Typically, strive for a lively pace. Readers’ attention spans are short —short —short.

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🛠️ Number one trick for structural editing

Use your voice

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✏️ 3. Line editing

  • Sentence length
      • Easy to check and when you revise several sentences for length, you will end up tightening them, guaranteed.
  • Dynamic vocabulary
      • Verbs are easiest to change.
      • Start with strong, descriptive nouns and support with strategic adverbs and adjectives.
      • Avoid generalities: Use specific and concrete language that creates images for the reader (if possible)
  • Wordiness fixes and clarity tips
      • Use passive voice rarely and intentionally.
      • Avoid conditional words, such as might, may, should, and could.
      • Omit needless words and phrases.
      • Is every word essential?
      • Look for repeated words and phrases in a clause or section.

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Adding creative, stylistic devices to help with pacing, rhythm

ALLITERATION-Repeating sound at the beginning of 2 or more words in a string:

Powerful politicians are polluting the environment.

ASSONANCE & CONSONANCE -Repeating sound in the middle of 2 or more words in a string:

The pace of the race was the fastest ever.”

ANTITHESIS-Contrast using the form of not X but Y.

Ask not for what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country.”

“Christ was benevolent; Christ was intimidating. Christ was black, Christ was white. How his appearance changed over time.”

PARALLELISM or PARALLEL STRUCTURE- Using similar structure for clauses within sentences, or similar structure and sounds for the start of multiple sentences.

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The reunification of a divided Egypt under one pharaoh stands as the hallmark for ushering in a new period of prosperity in Egyptian history. However, during the Late Period, Egypt had to contend with the pressures of other civilizations from Nubia, the Mediterranean, and the Near East, which exerted their influence in novel ways. During this period, the Egyptian rulers and elites crafted their identities by both reviving ancient traditions and adapting to a new cosmopolitan reality. Explore 8th and 7th century BCE at a moment when Egypt’s hallowed institutions innovated in the face of great turbulence and change.

Monday, May 19 Egypt in Transition: Renaissance and the Onset of the Late Period

Dynamic Vocabulary

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🔊 passive voice

Robust writing uses the active voice.

In other words, passive voice is not used as much by strong writers.

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🔊 Active Voice

With active voice the subject of the sentence performs or causes the action.

For Example:

Dr. Bandi delighted the audience with jokes about ancient Egypt.

Vs.

The audience was delighted by Dr. Bandi’s jokes about ancient Egypt.

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📝 Marie Kondo your writing

Clean up your clutter!

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And turnThis

FIRST DRAFT

FINAL!

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Words or phrases on repeat

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The research team categorized weight-related conversations and approaches parents used. Positive comments included respect for a diversity of body shapes and sizes and a broader approach to the concept of beauty. In negative discussions, parents focused on attractiveness based on a thin-beauty ideal or were critical of their child’s weight.

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Excessive info orWord pile-ups

  • The car drove slowly through the large complex heading in the direction of a secluded building at the back of the facility. The building was located on the shore of the Mississippi River. The vehicle came to a stop next to the entrance to the building.

To:

  • The car drove slowly through the large complex toward the shore of the Mississippi River and stopped next to the entrance of a secluded building.

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Unnecessary details

.

Before: After watching the videos, the survey participants were then asked a series of questions, which the researchers then analyzed. These questions usually requested the participants to rate how amused or anxious they felt while watching the videos on a scale of 1 (not at all) to 7 (very much.)

After: The participants rated videos based on how anxious or amused they felt while viewing them.

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Read out loud

Nothing improves your ability to edit superfluous material than reading your own words.

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�PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT!

  • See what you can do in just 15 minutes…
  • Check content from the point of view of your audience. Are the voice and tone consistent? Is it conversational? Are there enough details, or “hooks” to make them interested?
  • Review structure. Can you remove anything? Does the flow of info make logical sense? Do any transitions need improvement? (This can be inter-paragraph or between them.)
  • Line Edit for:
    • Sentence length
    • Dynamic vocab
    • Wordiness fixes
    • Embedding creative writing elements
    • Avoid passive voice

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🔍 4. Copy edit

    • Checking for grammar and typos
    • Use software! Use Microsoft Pilot, Grammarly Premium, or other editing software.
    • Ask AI to make suggestions.

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✅ 5. Proofread!

  • When your copy is in FINAL form.
  • Check for text alignment so words don’t overlap, such as the same word showing up one on top of the other.
  • Check for widows – one-word sentences.
  • Graphics and content match the subject?

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Last but not least….

  • I have thrown a lot of information at you. Like throwing spaghetti against a wall. Only a bit will stick. That’s okay. Pick the ones that work for you.
  • Know your limitations and focus on improving them.
  • Your writing will be more efficient and more effective if you adopt only a few of the things we discussed and practiced.