Skill: Accepting Apologies | Learning Goal: Conflict Resolution
Grades: 6-8 | Activity Type: Lesson | Purpose: 🟢 Core Instruction
Be Good People Curriculum © St. Croix River Education District
What if I Can't Forgive Someone?
Today, we'll talk about how to respond respectfully when we receive an apology, whether we're ready to forgive the person or not.
On a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you agree? Why?
WHY KNOWING HOW TO RECEIVE AN APOLOGY MATTERS: |
✅ People are more likely to keep being your friend if you can accept apologies well. ✅ People will be more likely to accept your apologies when you need to apologize. ✅ People will be more likely to view you as mature and deserving of leadership roles or responsibilities. |
At lunch, Mateo accidentally spills his juice on Clara’s notebook. Clara is upset as the pages are smudged, and Mateo quickly apologizes, saying it was an accident. Clara feels frustrated but knows Mateo didn’t mean to do it and now must decide how to respond.
How should Mateo handle this situation? What’s important to consider?
What wisdom would you share with an elementary student about how to handle it when someone apologizes to them?
Picture this!
What about this sounds right? 👍
What details might be missing? 🤔
ROADMAP
TIP #1: |
If you don’t want to accept the apology, it's common to explain why, and people will usually expect it. If you're feeling strong emotions, you might have to keep your response short and not explain why. |
“I can’t stand it when people say ‘sorry’ instead of fixing things. Like if you can do something about it, do it. Don’t come to me with your ‘sorry’ because you’re obviously not.”
On a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you relate to what he’s saying? Why?
👍 👎
What’s your take?
TIP #2: |
Adding words like "I accept your apology" or "I forgive you" sends a stronger message. It may be especially helpful to use these words when the person apologized for a big mistake. |
What do you think is the best way to tell someone you’re not ready to accept their apology?
During a soccer game, Amir bumps into Kaylee and causes her to miss a goal. Amir admits he didn’t follow the rules and apologizes after the game. Kaylee is still upset about losing the point and has to choose how to respond to Amir’s apology.
Skip to end
Play it out: How would the tips and suggestions that we’ve discussed look in this situation?
Words of wisdom: What advice would help someone handle this situation well?
Heads up: What pitfalls should someone try to avoid in a situation like this? How?
Lessons learned: I’ve been through a similar situation and here’s what I learned from it…
Choose one ⬇
During group presentations, Lucas accidentally interrupts Mia while she’s speaking, making her lose her train of thought. Later, Lucas apologizes for cutting her off. Mia feels embarrassed but needs to decide how to respond to Lucas’s apology.
Skip to end
Play it out: How would the tips and suggestions that we’ve discussed look in this situation?
Words of wisdom: What advice would help someone handle this situation well?
Heads up: What pitfalls should someone try to avoid in a situation like this? How?
Lessons learned: I’ve been through a similar situation and here’s what I learned from it…
Choose one ⬇
During a group project, Elena jokes about Isaiah’s handwriting, not realizing it upsets him. Later, she apologizes and explains she didn’t mean to hurt his feelings. Isaiah is still hurt but must decide how to handle Elena’s apology.
Skip to end
Play it out: How would the tips and suggestions that we’ve discussed look in this situation?
Words of wisdom: What advice would help someone handle this situation well?
Heads up: What pitfalls should someone try to avoid in a situation like this? How?
Lessons learned: I’ve been through a similar situation and here’s what I learned from it…
Choose one ⬇
Ava realizes she forgot to invite her friend Jalen to her birthday party. When Jalen finds out, he’s hurt. Ava apologizes, explaining it was an oversight and not intentional. Jalen feels left out but now needs to figure out how to handle Ava’s apology.
Skip to end
Play it out: How would the tips and suggestions that we’ve discussed look in this situation?
Words of wisdom: What advice would help someone handle this situation well?
Heads up: What pitfalls should someone try to avoid in a situation like this? How?
Lessons learned: I’ve been through a similar situation and here’s what I learned from it…
Choose one ⬇
Nice work! To recap, we learned more about: