Growth Mindset & the power of ‘what if’ �in Can’t Hurt Me
Associate Prof Dr Raihanah Mohd Mydin
Faculty of Social Sciences & Humanities,
UKM
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Imagine
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You grew up in an abusive household.
Your father forces you to work at his business until late at night.
You are tired in the morning and cannot concentrate in school.
You fail your subjects.
How would you feel about yourself?
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How do you cope with your circumstance?��
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That was �the childhood which David Goggins shares in his memoir�Can’t hurt me (2020)
Picture of David Goggins taken from https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:DavidGogginsMay08.jpg
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Attribution: Paul Rudman
License: Creative Commons
Main text for this session
We will use the memoir, Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins as our focus.
It was first published in 2018.
The second version came out in 2020.
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In this session we will discuss
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Examples of fixed and growth mindsets based on David Goggins’ story.
Types of statements that reflect fixed and growth mindsets.
Strategies to promote a growth mindset adapted from David’s life experiences as he describes them in his memoir Can’t Hurt Me.
The exposition of Can’t Hurt Me
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David Goggins shares his story of overcoming the many challenges he faced growing up in an abusive household.
He experienced physical, verbal and emotional abuse from his alcoholic father.
He had to work at his father’s skating rink, Skateland, every night until it closed.
He couldn’t concentrate at school and began failing his studies.
Abuse and the Fixed Mindset in Can’t Hurt Me
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Physical and verbal abuse can traumatised individuals into believing that they are not worthy or not good enough.
In chapter one, David shares the many tragic stories of abuse he suffered at the hands of his father and how it crippled him emotionally and psychologically to believe he was not worthy of success or happiness.
Fixed mindset & self-naming in Can’t Hurt Me
“Imagine being the only black kid in class, in the entire school, and enduring the daily humiliation of also being the dumbest. I felt like everything I tried to do or say was wrong, and it got so bad that instead of responding …whenever the teacher called my name, I often chose to keep quiet. It was all about limiting exposure to save face.” (Goggins, 2020: page 39)
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Fixed mindset & self perception in Can’t Hurt Me
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“Studying was hard, especially with my screwed-up brain…” (Goggins, 2020: page 42)
“You are born to fail.” (Goggins, 2020: page 42)
“My coping mechanism confirmed that I would never learn squat at school, and that I would never catch up, which pushed me closer towards a flunked-out state.” (Goggins, 2020: page 42)
Fixed mindset & self-acceptance in Can’t Hurt Me
“ I was rejecting my past and therefore rejecting myself. My foundation, my character was defined by self-rejection. All my fears came from that deep-seated uneasiness I carried with being David Goggins because of what I’d gone through. Even after I’d reached a point where I no longer cared about what others thought of me, I still had trouble accepting me.” (Goggins, 2020: page 147)
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Time to reflect:�
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What kind of difficulties have you experienced in life?
What is the story you tell of your difficulties?
Do you say: “I can’t do it!”
Do you say: “I’m not good enough”
What else do you tell yourself?
Time�to �grow
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Let’s learn a few strategies to overcome our limiting beliefs.
These ideas are adapted from David’s memoir
Can’t Hurt Me (2020).
Growth mindset in �Can't hurt me
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David shares many strategies about how anyone can turn their life around.
No matter your circumstance in life, you can get better if you change your mindset.
And take focused actions.
3 strategies to develop a growth mindset adapted from �Can’t Hurt Me
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Strategy #1 Mirroring what we read
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In Can’t hurt me, David sets his readers’ different challenges at the end of each chapter.
Every milestone that he reaches in his life story, and with every critical lesson he learns, David transforms it into a challenge for the readers.
He calls it ‘mirror’ (Goggins, 2020: page 101) what we read.
Action for strategy #1
Mirror what you read
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Strategy #2 ask the question - �‘What if’ I could?
“What if is an exquisite response to anyone who has ever doubted your greatness or stood in your way. It silences negativity. It’s a reminder that you don’t really know what you’re capable of until you put everything you’ve got on the line. It makes the impossible feel at least a little more possible. What if is the power and permission to face down your darkest demons, your very worst memories and accept them as part of your history. If and when you do that, you will be able to use them as fuel to envision the most audacious, outrageous achievement and go get it.” (Goggins, 2020: page 353)
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Action for Strategy # 2
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Identify your ‘don't-like-to-do’ or ‘impossible-to-achieve’ list.
List out
What if you could do the things on the list, how would you feel?
Ask yourself
Take time to consciously imagine what it would be like if you could achieve them.
Imagine
Strategy #3 �do what you don’t like.
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Action for strategy #3
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Go through the ‘don't-like-to-do’ or ‘impossible-to-achieve’ list. (See strategy #2)
Return to the list
Spend time daily doing one of the activities on the list. E.g. exercise, read, learn something new etc.
Get out of your comfort zone
Develop a ‘can-do dialogue with yourself’ (Goggins, 2020: page 101)
‘Can-do’ mindset
Concluding �remarks
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David Goggins & Developing Growth mindset
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How is it connected to �a growth mindset?
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One way to encourage yourself to overcome a challenge is by using the word “yet”
Don’t say, ‘I can't do this’. Say ‘I can’t yet’.
Make time and effort to work on the challenge you are facing.
Growth mindset �and the power of ‘yet’
“… if you get a failing grade you think, I’m nothing, I’m nowhere. But if you get the grade “not yet” you understand that you’re on a learning curve. It gives you a path into the future.” (Carol Dweck, 2014)
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Dweck, C S (2014) ‘The power of yet’ TEDxNorrköping
Time for Action
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What's the one area in your life that you want to get better at but have not made the effort to improve?
What if you could get it done?
How would that make you feel?
Can you imagine achieving your ‘impossible’ dream?
Isn't it worth attempting?
Get started today!
For more discussions on Stories for �Growth Mindset
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Please�email �questions �and comments �to�raihanah@ukm.edu.my
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All pictures taken from Pixabay
License: Creative Commons