Concise Writing
Use Concrete Language and Expressive Verbs
Write in the Active Voice
Passive voice: The beach was visited by my wife.
Passive voice: We are being drenched by the rain.
Active voice: My wife visited the beach.
Active voice: The rain is drenching us.
Watch for Needless Repetition
Limit Your Use of Adverbs
Sentence with adverb: The dog sat lazily on the couch.
The dog rested on the couch.
The dog relaxed on the couch.
The dog lounged on the couch.
The dog lazed on the couch.
Don’t Overuse Adjectives
Unnecessary: They drove past the red fire hydrant.
Better: They drove past the fire hydrant.
Or, necessary again: They drove past the aquamarine fire hydrant.
One Idea per Sentence
Confusing: The car’s totaled; you’ll never fix it, and even if you could I don’t know how that helps me find work since no one’s hiring, not since the bauxite mine closed.
Easier to read, but now choppy: The car’s totaled. You’ll never fix it. Even if you could, I don’t know how that helps me find work. No one’s hiring, not since the bauxite mine closed.
Clearer: The car’s totaled; you’ll never fix it. Even if you could, how does that help me find work? No one’s hiring, not since the bauxite mine closed.
Avoid Qualifying Sentences
Wordy: Clifford is a dog. He is big and red.
Concise: Clifford is a big red dog.
Don’t Over rely on Auxiliary Words
Auxiliary word bonanza: My dragon has a tail that is very long and that stretches above my roof, and which could probably touch a passing jet if it was following a flight path which was passing low to the ground somewhere nearby us.
Better: My dragon’s long tail stretches above my roof, and could probably touch a passing jet with a low flight plan.
Limit Turns of Phrase
Clichéd: When he blew off our date, it only added fuel to the fire.
Better: I grew even angrier at him when he didn’t show up for our date.
Limit the Use of Fancy Words
Over-fancy: Clandestinely, Jordan lamented being the school’s cynosure.
Readable: Secretly, Jordan regretted being the school’s center of attention.
Avoid Overstatement
Overwritten: My passion was all-consuming, surpassing, mind-numbing, a raging bonfire that engulfed the entire universe and collapsed all of reality into a single infinitely beguiling point: him.
Better: I felt overwhelming passion for him.