Bully Busting 104-Using Polite Threats
Verbal Judo Institute

Sometimes the only way to stop bullies is to tell them exactly what will happen if their verbal abuse continues.

A basic polite threat word block works like this:
1. ACKNOWLEDGE their feeling "I can see that you don't like me......."
2. EXPLAIN THE CONSEQUENCES "but you would not want the teacher to hear you saying that, would you?"

As with humor and apology word blocks, you must respond quickly and without a trace of anger or emotion. Keep working on your Mushin!

At this point you have tried either or both the humor or apology word blocks with the bully but they continue to insult you or try to pick a fight with you. You cannot ignore the problem--that will only empower the bully to continue to use you as a whipping post. Ignoring the bully, or just hoping he will go away WILL NOT STOP HIM/HER. *
So now is the time to use POLITE THREATS. Remember this only works if you keep your mushin. The polite threat gives the bully a reality check. In other words, they will get in trouble if they continue the harrassment! If you are at school remind them that you both can be suspended. Or tell them that you are going to have to tell the teacher or someone else in authority. Outside of school, you may tell them that you will have to get both sets of parents involved to get this stopped. *
Like the other word blocks we have discussed so far, you HAVE TO PRACTICE your response. Just like kicking and punching where you have to do them over and over to develop muscle memory, you have to do the same thing with your word blocks. They have to become automatic. Start with your parents, have them act like the bully saying the same things the bully says. Then practice your response--confident and in control. *
If you are being bullied, write down the things they say or do to you that really makes you angry
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Give several polite threats you can use on that bully you mentioned above. Specifically address the things you wrote down above. *
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First Name *
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Last Name *
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Add phone number if you want to be contacted.
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