Church of Lemons 2023

Serene: *Paces nervously behind the curtain, note cards in hand as the crowd begins to file in* Where is she? She's late! Again. *Peeks out to see the crowd is getting impatient.*

Trinton: *Whispers* Pst! Where's Rose?

Serene: *Whispers* running late. Gotta stall. 

Loyce: She's always late.

Mouse: Pretty sure she'll be late to her own funeral.

Dark Sharingan: *over an earpiece* I could make some Simpsons or Seinfeld references.

Serene: No! I'll, uh, handle this. *Into the microphone* Ahem! Now, to start us off with a good laugh, how about some witty and fun, indulgent puns?

Owl: Yes! 

Lowland Viking: Do it!

Rose: *Appears out of nowhere as if summoned* ABSOLUTELY NOT! *shoves the Mawwiage hat onto her head and finishes tying her bath, er 'ceremonial' robe.* That'll do, Serene.

Serene: Thank Gundam! *runs off stage*

Rose: *steps up to the podium* AHEM! Mawwiage. Mawwiage and the smexy things that happen between our OTP's is what bwings us togever today. Wuv! True wuv. And kisses and nakedness....

Trinton & Jesse: *slap hands over ears*

Jesse: This isn't like any church that should be allowed. Ever.

Trinton: I came for the snacks.

Loyce: Oooh, there are snacks?

Rose: *sighs* Fine. Welcome to the annual Love Reflection event honoring the love we have for our OTP's and the smexy love they share with one another! This year we are allowing some new fandoms as well as Heero x Relena. As the original Sinner knows, the only, real non-negotiable as far as the event is concerned is: when Heero and Relena exist in the story, they must be together. Not with other people *glares at Loyce*

Loyce: Sheesh. It's been 20 years. Glad she doesn't hold a grudge or anything. :P 

Rose: We're also including: 86, My Hero Academia, Naruto, and SpyXFamily. If you want to do a pair from another fandom, just DM me. We're here to support each other, most of all. :) 

As per our usual custom, we have a chosen a sinner. The one whose soul our offerings are created in the hopes of redemption. This year, for the sin of not feeding us the promised 1xR smut last year--

Trinton: I heard 'feeding'. Is it snack time, yet?

Loyce: Is there pie?

Rose: Of course there's pie. Fine, since everyone's hungry, we'll skip to the end.

WingNut: Man and Wife?

Rose: The Sinner is Lowland Viking. Ok, let's eat.

Viking: Me? But I-

Rose: No excuses! Now! Get to writing! *cracks the vicious Noodle of Death* 15 1xR stories! Unless you can find enough people to pledge in your place!

Viking: *sweating nervously* I'm not a machine!

Trinton: *filling his plate* Look, I've been to a lot of these. She's unmerciful. You're better off asking people to pledge, and skipping the dramatics. Besides, the brisket looks good.

Serene: *leans towards Owl* should we help him this year?

Owl: hm... maybe. I'll think about it. After the pie.

Serene: Well, yeah, naturally. Pie first.

Viking: *stares forlornly* Can I have pie? 

Loyce: You're the Sinner. You're supposed to be begging.

Viking: Fine. Please. Please, please. May I have pie.

Rose: NOT PIE, Pledges!

*Emily passes a piece of pie to Jesse*: This one's going to be fun.

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