As you're working on this self-reflection, consider the statement on grading and assessment from our course syllabus:
"This course will focus on qualitative not quantitative assessment, something we’ll discuss during the class, both with reference to your own work and the works we’re studying. While you will get a final grade at the end of the term, I will not be grading individual assignments, but rather asking questions and making comments that engage your work rather than simply evaluate it. You will also be reflecting carefully on your own work and the work of your peers. The intention here is to help you focus on working in a more organic way, as opposed to working as you think you’re expected to. If this process causes more anxiety than it alleviates, see me at any point to confer about your progress in the course to date. If you are worried about your grade, your best strategy should be to join the discussions, do the reading, and complete the assignments. You should consider this course a 'busy-work-free zone.' If an assignment does not feel productive, we can find ways to modify, remix, or repurpose the instructions."
You may also want to read Alfie Kohn's, "The Case Against Grades": www.alfiekohn.org/article/case-grades/