TPC 2017 DC - Lightning Talks!

The Perl Conference 2017 in DC (YAPC::NA 2017) will be held near Washington, DC at the US Patent Office (USPTO) from June 18-23, 2017. The main conference will be June 19-21, 2017 with tutorials on the days before and after. We hereby invite you to participate by submitting a lightning talk!

Submit anytime you like, including during the conference! Each day toward the end there will be a lightning talk session. Lightning talks are 5-minute talks on any topic you like!

If you are accepted to speak assume you will speak on the first available day unless other arrangements are made in advance.

For a full description of Lightning Talks consult the wiki.

Email address
Name of the Talk
This will be displayed on the schedule and website
Your answer
Your Name
This will be displayed on conference material -- while we prefer a full name it is fine to use an alias.
Your answer
On some pages just the Title will be listed, but sometimes we will also display this longer description of the talk.
Your answer
Preview Description
Before the actual talk you might not want to let everyone know the full description. Use this optional version to display before the talk happens to maintain the surprise.
Your answer
Seriousness of talk
Take your best guess. Talks are generally ordered each day to have the more serious topics/speakers first and the funnier topics/speakers later. If you have any special requests you can mention them in Notes to Reviewers question below. If you are not a regular speaker and are unsure of which to pick, error in the direction of serious and speak earlier. For this question Serious has nothing to do with importance or usefulness, it is just a hint for ordering the lineup.
Completely Serious Talk
Completely Humorous Talk or Rant
CPAN Username
This will be displayed on conference material if provided.
Your answer
Twitter Username
This will be displayed on conference material if provided.
Your answer
This will be displayed on conference material if provided.
Your answer
Brief Bio
Tell attendees a little about yourself. This will be displayed on conference material. If you have a longer talk a valid answer here is "See longer talks bio".
Your answer
Notes for Reviewers (optional)
Tell us anything you'd like us to know about this talk -- why you think it would be awesome, if you are a first time speaker and would like some feedback, if you need any special equipment (beyond standard projector), if you are not available to speak all 3 days, if you want to be creative with the 5 minute limit, ...
Your answer
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