JSR Skills Worksheet 1: BREVITY
Many writers mistakenly muddle their work with unnecessary words or content. For both informative articles and editorials, strive to deliver information with brevity and without sacrificing style, quality, or important points. Practice this skill and your articles will resonate more clearly with readers.

DIRECTIONS

Remove the unnecessary words or content from the following excerpts.

EXAMPLE

Original: "Local pharmacies such as Walgreen's and Rite-Aid have reported a sell-out of vaccinations and many patients had to be turned down due to the lack of available substances. They were asked to wait for the next shipment of vaccines to arrive, which could take as long as a week."

Improved: "Pharmacies, including Walgreen's and Rite-Aid, report turning away patients due to a shortage of vaccines. Patients have been asked to wait as long as a week for new shipments to arrive."


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Your name *
Your editor's name *
Passage 1 *
John Green, an author known for his books "Looking for Alaska" and "An Abundance of Katherines" (along with his video blog project with his brother Hank), wrote “The Fault in Our Stars,” a novel about a 16-year-old girl named Hazel Grace Lancaster, who experiences the effects of thyroid cancer not only upon her physical features, but on her life.
Passage 2 *
Baseball, one of our oldest and most popular outdoor summer sports in terms of total attendance at ball parks and viewing on television, has the kind of rhythm of play on the field that alternates between times when players passively wait with no action taking place between the pitches to the batter and then times when they explode into action as the batter hits a pitched ball to one of the players and the player fields it.
Passage 3 *
In my opinion, I think the study of Sociology is very fascinating.
Passage 4 *
In my opinion, our country will be served much better than it is being served now if we had a president in office who was much more concerned with the welfare of the common people than with the welfare of big corporations. I think that the President is so concerned about getting elected back into office for his next term that he has to focus too much energy on raising money for his next campaign. To get that money, he has to rely on big contributions from big corporations that contribute a lot of money to campaigns. These corporations expect something in return for these contributions, so they only give it to him if they think he is going to reward them with laws and policies that are good for them. What is good for them is not usually good for the common people in this country, so I believe we need to do something so that this changes.
Passage 5 *
True, but you do not want your article to be filled with words that are so unimportant that they can be deleted from your article without any loss of meaning. And it is a fact that readers do not appreciate having to make their way through all of those unnecessary and unimportant words.
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