Ms. Flannigan: Hello.

Student: Jenny?

Ms. Flannigan: Hi!

Student:: Where are you?

Ms. Flannigan: I'm in the mall.

Student:: Oh. Well, um. We have a problem.

Ms. Flannigan: What?

Student:: I'm not going to be able to go tonight.

Ms. Flannigan: Oh, (student)!

Student:: Because...remember this morning when I left you that message.

Ms. Flannigan: Yea.

Student:: Well, when I was taking a shower I left it on my bed and my mom found it.

Ms. Flannigan: (Student)....Ugh...(student)...Oh my God!

Student: ...My mom was asking me questions and she doesn’t know exactly what happened and she doesn’t know...she was telling me that she was going to take me to the doctor to see if I had sex with you and that...

Ms. Flannigan: To see if you had what?

Student: To see if I had sex with you...And she’s been asking me questions all day and I’ve been lying to her, telling her that it never happened, that I don’t know what she’s talking about. And I don’t know what to do. What should I say? Should I just tell her the truth or what do you want me to do?

Ms. Flannigan: No (student)...Please...I wish I could talk to you.

Student: What do I say to her because my dad’s come home now.

Ms. Flannigan: No, no, say no. No, no, no, no, no. please (student).

Student: Yea, but what are they gonna do when...I get to the doctor’s and they find out.

Ms. Flannigan: There’s nothing, there’s nothing, there’s nothing. They can’t find anything out by that. There’s nothing that shows. And (student) I don’t know...

Student: I know but I’ve been trying to talk to you and...

Ms. Flannigan: Well you had plenty of time to talk to me and you didn’t talk to me. I’m not angry but, (student), ugh..

Student: Sorry, what am I supposed to do? Just keep denying it?

Ms. Flannigan: Ugh..what do you think?

Student: I think, I don’t know. My dad’s coming home. He’s gonna start asking me questions and my mom doesn’t know if she should call the police.

Ms. Flannigan: (student)...why would you do something so dumb? Please (student) no...

Student: I didn’t leave it on my bed on purpose. I went to go to the shower and I left it on my bed under my pillow and then it beeped and then my mom...

Ms. Flannigan: But you know what...Please (student). Ugh...they can’t tell...ugh..

Student: What do you want me to do? Just keep denying it?

Ms. Flannigan: Yes....ugh...what are you saying?

Student: They’re going to find out eventually.

Ms. Flannigan: No they’re not!

Student: They gonna keep asking me, keep asking me and I’m gonna end up cracking. I can’t live like this. How you expect a 13 -year-old to go through his life and have everybody for the rest of his life asking him if what happened was true? And you are over there dancing and....with your sisters boyfriend.

Ms. Flannigan: I’m not. No way. (student) No way. (student) I’ve been crying day in and day out and you’ve been so mean...it’s not my fault that you haven’t been able to go out, it’s not my fault that you’ve been sick, it’s not my fault that you couldn't go, you know and it’s not my fault, I tried. That’s why I kept coming by, I kept calling because I thought you thought I was neglecting you but I didn’t know....(student) why would you do something like this..ugh...ugh...

Student: I didn’t do this on purpose. You tell me that you never made a mistake like this? That you never left something and someone never found it?

Ms. Flannigan: Ugh...ugh...ugh...

Student: Whatever I’m just saying.

Ms. Flannigan: (student)

Student: What?

Ms. Flannigan: Is, is somebody listening?

Student: No

Ms. Flannigan: Ugh...ugh..ugh...

Student: The only person...there’s no body at my house because my mom left to go pick up my dad and the kids are outside.

Ms. Flannigan: OK (student) you have to keep...Yes you’ve kissed me. I love you, I love you with all my heart. I’ve never loved anyone as much as I love you. I told your father that yesterday. I said, I couldn’t love anyone any more than if I could have birthed you and you can from my body. I love you so much. I adore you and ugh, if anything happened it was because I loved you and let my feelings show...

Student: It’s more than that. Do you know that we had sex. That’s more than just kisses, that’s more than just buying me presents, that’s more than just helping my parents pay rent and fix a car.

Ms. Flannigan: Yes, (student) and if you never want to see me again...

Student: It’s not that. We can still be friends but the thing is, what am I going to do right now if my parents are mad at me because they think that I’m lying? And they found the message and they’re over here interrogating me...wait, what?

Ms. Flannigan: You should never have written that. If you do, if you do, say..my life is over. Do you want to kill me? Do you want to get me in trouble ? I know that you’re hurting....

Student: If I wanted to get you in trouble, if I wanted to put you in prison so fast I would have already told somebody as soon as it happened.

Ms. Flannigan: Then be strong (student). Listen, I. I’m trying to make up for it, I’m trying to make up for it. Loving you and expressing that um...I don't know why...ugh...things happen like this and I don't you know...please, please. I mean...ugh...you have to be strong you’ve done it before, please.

Student: don't you know what happened? We had sex a lot. It wasn’t, it wasn't just once, it wasn't just...

Ms. Flannigan: We can’t talk about this on the phone.

Student: When do you want to talk to me?

Ms. Flannigan: I tried to talk to you last week. We can’t talk on the phone. We cant write and I wanted to talk to you. You had a chance to talk to me, you had a chance to ask me questions but you wouldn't talk to me and now we have a big, big, big problem and...

Student: I need to talk to you now. I need to tell you what I’m feeling I need you to tell me what to do, I need you to tell me. We need to talk now...because you already know you can’t come by here . We can’t go out, don’t you love me Ms. Flannigan?

Ms. Flannigan: I love you, I love you with all my heart.  I love you, I love you so very very much. I love you so much that I would die for you. I love you so much that I would give everything in this world for you...um...ugh...and you did it before and I did it, but you know...

Student: Aren’t you sorry for what you did to me?...I haven’t even heard you say that yet...

Ms. Flannigan: Yes, I have

Student: Well you said it the first, second time that you did it with me...

Ms. Flannigan: (student) you have talked to me many times and you’ve told me that you don’t want to kiss me anymore and I said fine and we will be friends...

Student: ...That’s not what happened this time, I’ve been telling you I don’t want to kiss you anymore and I don’t want to have sex with you anymore and I don’t want anything anything like...I just want to be friends and you just keep pushing it...

Ms. Flannigan: No..no (student)  You initiated and you, I’m sorry...uh...you know you surprised me when you kissed me on the cruise. I was like I was surprised I am confused to and I am human and I care about you and I'm sorry what was my choice I’ve tried to support you to be there for you to buy you clothes to buy you shoes buy you you know that's how I’ve tried my best to help you and to make up for anything that I might have done wrong I'm not saying that I haven't done anything that um you know I mean I’ve done a lot of things wrong in my life and anybody that thinks that they are perfect is not...

Student: Do you think it was right to have sex with me Ms. Flannigan?

Ms. Flannigan: I don't know whats’ right in this world, I mean in this world yes, it was not right and...um ..but when you love somebody and sometimes...You know I loved you and you loved me and and that's never happened to me before, that, that strong feeling and I’m sorry but ugh I’ve tried to fight my feelings for you, I mean, I’ve tried. I love you very, very much and I’ve been heart broken and I thought you didn't want to see me anymore I thought I was making you unhappy and I don't blame you for being confused and feeling hurt and maybe you were crying out for help. Maybe you did mean for that to be on your bed...ugh...and I just wish I could have been there to help you...Do you want to hurt me? Do you want me to get in trouble?

Student: No...if I wanted to get you in trouble why would I be calling you right now to tell you not to stop by? To tell you that my parents know? If I wanted you to get in trouble I would've just let you come by and let my parents deal with you and call the police..

Ms. Flannigan: Well you know...well that might be what happens, you know, people write things and kids write things and kids experiment and I find notes in school and you know, I mean you know, maybe you made a mistake and you were playing around and I don't know I mean...ugh ...ugh...

Student: Ms. Flannigan?

Ms. Flannigan: What?

Student: Of all the men in the world, the males in the world why did you have to pick me to have sex with?

Ms. Flannigan: Why are you saying that...I just told you why I don't know why it happened. I don't know why I love you so much and why anything. I just know that it never happened before and it would never never happen again and you know, I don't know I’ve tried to understand, could it be that I’ve even tried to imagine, if I knew you in another lifetime or I just felt so close to you because I know you needed somebody and I needed somebody and we made each other happy and I was happy just being with you just being around you and seeing your beautiful smile and your sweet face? And I want to make you happy and if you ever wanted anything I wanted to get it for you. If you ever needed anything I wanted to get it for you. You were my child, my brother my everything. You know that song...and my feelings haven't changed at all, even as mean as you've been to me and ...um...I will always love you (student) no matter what, because you reached out to me and you needed me. Can you hear me?

Student: Yea

Ms. Flannigan: My phone might go out...I need to go out to my car...I needed someone to love and I adored you and you kept calling me and needing me and I didn't want you to feel like I didn't love you. I didn't want you to feel like I didn't care and...ugh...ugh...

Student: Ms. Flannigan, when I told you, when my mom told you about what happened in Miami with me and my step dad and my mom and the drugs and all that, when she told you that, she told you I needed someone to love. She didn't mean that I needed someone to have sex with. She didn't mean that I needed someone to go and do this to me and now I have...um...my parents asking me all these questions and...

Ms. Flannigan: (student), did I hurt you, did I hurt you?

Student: Physically no, but mentally yes.

Ms. Flannigan: Well, you know what, you can go through life saying that. You can feel that I took advantage of you. You can feel that I hurt. You you can feel a lot of things or you can say that you loved me and that I loved her and what happened was because, if anything happened, we loved each other and and it wasn't like I was going out of my way and thinking, oh, let me...uh...have a relationship with a kid, which I certainly don't need but I can’t deny that I loved you and cared about you and I found out from my sister that I'm not the only person in this world that, that can happen to. And you know, if you want me to say I'm sorry, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for a lot of things. I am human and...ugh...you are human, and I you know I loved you...ugh...I really cared about you...

Student: Why would you, why would you go and ruin your relationship with Doug? Or go and...you could have any guy. What about that gym teacher...or what about that guy at McDonald's? Or you could have had him. You could have had Tony. You could have had any guy that you wanted and out of all those people you had to choose me. You chose to have sex with me instead of going on dates with other people...

Ms. Flannigan: (student) wait, you kissed me. You, you know, I'm not blaming you. I will never blame you, you’re a kid, but you can’t say G. tried to kiss me and touch me. And you know, and you know what, I have, I’ve gone out. I see people every day. I try to, you know, but I didn't love them. I didn’t love them. I’m not in love with them and I've told you before they don't mean anything to me. And if i didn’t see them again I wouldn't care, but if I never saw you again I don't think I could live. I think that my whole heart would just fall out and that’s how I felt. I haven't been able to sleep, I haven't been able to eat. And I’ve been crying every day. And last night I prayed. I prayed that you would not be mad at me and that we could talk and that I could help you and that I understand how you are feeling because I can’t read your mind..ugh...

Student: I was wondering this. I was wondering this, did you ever do anything with G.? And don't lie.

Ms. Flannigan: No, absolutely not. Absolutely not.

 Student: Did you ever do anything with Jose?

Ms. Flannigan: Of course not.

Student: How do I know if you are telling the truth or not?

Ms. Flannigan: I’ll swear on W. life. I’ll swear on your life. I’ll swear on my love for you. I’ll swear...um...I’ll swear on my mothers life...may God strike me dead tonight if I'm lying...

Student: You know that...right now my mom and dad are in the car driving over here to them house and they’re talking about what happened on the phone and what they...call the police and I  already know my mom is going to see if she can get a doctors appointment or take me to the emergency room to see if I had sex with you...

Ms. Flannigan: I already told you they cannot tell. They cannot tell anything and...they can tell with a girl, they cant tell with a boy...

Student: So, Ms. Flannigan, you’re saying that I'm the only person...

Ms. Flannigan: You know what, if she takes you to the hospital what’s that gonna be? That’s gonna...I might as well go home and kill myself...uggh..I’m sorry..and I’m..

Student: So, am I the only one, besides Doug?

Ms. Flannigan: Yes.

Student: How do I know you’re telling the truth besides you swearing on peoples lives?

Ms. Flannigan: How can I..what do you want me to say..umm...may God strike me dead at this very minute if I'm lying...umm...umm...

Student: Are you still at the mall?

Ms. Flannigan: No, I'm in my car. I’ll give you $1,000. I’ll give you ugh...no...ugh...

Student: I need to talk to you and you keep ignoring me...

Ms. Flannigan: I don't keep ignoring you. You keep ignoring me.

Student: No, you keep writing, don’t write this don't write that, don't...its going to get me in trouble it’s like all you care about is if you go to jail...you don't care if I end up in the mental home...

Ms. Flannigan: ...If you think that you know...anybody on this earth can make excuse because no body's life is free of problems. No body's life is free of abuse of some kind. You know, I grew up in a very hostile home I could be going and taking drugs. I could be going out being an alcoholic. I could make excuses for my life. I could say oh, I had an unhealthy childhood because my parents fought all the time or I could say alright my parents fought all the time, I forgive them. Alright they are human and I'm gonna learn from them...I’ve been in therapy. I’ve gone and I’ve talked and you know what, you can talk and talk and talk but eventually you just have to pick yourself up and say that’s the past and what am I gonna do with my life?...am I going to live my life feeling sorry for myself?....you know you already have issues with your mom with things...if you use it as an excuse to wreck your life then you’re not a very smart boy...and you are a smart boy and you have a lot of potential...

Student: I'm not using that excuse to wreck my life...I'm using it because maybe it worked for you to just forget about it and put it behind you or it was easier for you to just go, I'm going to have sex with this 13-year-old and I'm going to just forget about it and I'm gonna go and have fun with my friends....

Ms. Flannigan: I'm not having fun...what do you think, I’ve been trying to talk to you. I’ve been trying to call you. I’ve been coming by. I’ve been almost every...when you were sick I was by almost every day so if your mom wanted to kill me...why did I do that? Because I care about you and your brothers, and I care about your family and I don't want to hurt you. I’ve never wanted to hurt you...

Student: I’ve been wanting to talk to you over the phone for the longest and you just keep ignoring me and telling me that you don't want to talk about it, you don't want to get yourself in trouble...you think that I'm actually trying to record you.

Ms. Flannigan: I...maybe not you, maybe someone else...because the phone they can be receiving...things that are written can be retrieved and it’s, you know, it’s just not smart. You know, I would have rather talked to you in person. I wanted to talk to you I tried when we went to Boomers. I tried on New Years Eve. I tried...I was there to listen and to hear you and no I'm not living my life and going on and saying I don't care. I care. I feel responsible. Now what do I do? Do I give up my life? Do I give up teaching? Do I...uh...lose my job, lose my home...um...serve time , whatever? Or do I go on from here helping you in any possible way that I can, still continuing to do my best as a teacher? And I think I really am a good teacher and I have a positive effect on my students. And I think that I can do so much more in this world by living a good life and living a good...serving by teaching and caring about others. You know, I went to church, I went to church Christmas eve. I went to church on Sunday and I prayed and prayed...

Student: Well that's what your telling me and but, when I talk, when I talked to my dad, my dad told me that on Christmas Eve you were at that party and you kissed, you kissed your sisters husband and that you even were at the club for the past few days while I've been at home trying to worry...

Ms. Flannigan: ...listen to me, listen to me. I went out because I was in so much pain. I went out because I was going crazy. I went out because my heart was broken I went out with Marina and I couldn't eat. I...I...Christmas night I was at my sisters and I walked maybe five miles. I was going to go drown myself in the Intercostal, jump off a lighthouse or something...the whole time I went I prayed...I was so upset and then I had to sleep on the floor and my sisters husband kept giving me pillows and giving me blankets and tucking me...then he started rubbing my hand...why does he keep rubbing my hand either hes really concerned about me or he’s trying to come onto me and I didn't know which it was and then when he kissed me I knew and then you know I tried to runaway...and I wanted to escape. I wanted to run away. I had no sleep that night and now I have to live with that...

Student: Now going back to the subject. What am I going to do Ms. Flannigan? My parents are going to be here in about ten minutes...

Ms. Flannigan: I'm surprised they’re not there already.

Student: They probably, are but I'm inside so I don't know.

Ms. Flannigan: (student)...ugh...

Student: What do you want me to say to them?

Ms. Flannigan: You did it before.

Student: I did what before?

Ms. Flannigan: You remember when you were asked questions before...

Student: ...Ill try to explain to my parents and I’ll try to fix this thing up..

Ms. Flannigan: (student)...I...I...how can you doubt that I don't love you...

Student: I think my parents are coming to my house. I have to go. I have to talk to you later.

Ms. Flannigan: (student) please remember that I love you and please be strong. I love you so much...

Student: OK.

Ms. Flannigan: And I'm sorry. I'm sorry to hurt you or worry you or ever hurt you or scare you...I wish I could protect you.

Student: I got go Ms. Flannigan

Ms. Flannigan: Bye.