Mollena Williams' Kink Biography.

This “Delicate, Trembling Flower of Submission” © is a NYC born and raised writer, actress, BDSM Educator, Storyteller and an Award-Winning Executive Pervert.  She is extremely proud to have served as International Ms Leather 2010. She is also thrilled to have been named Ms. San Francisco Leather 2009 after that contest's decade long slumber.

She is deeply honored and profoundly humbled to have been selected to receive the 2012 Jack McGeorge Award for Excellence in Education by Black Rose, and is thrilled to have won the the National Leather Association's 2012 Cynthia Slater Non-Fiction Article Award. She was a finalist for the 21st Annual Pantheon of Leather’s Woman of the Year & Northern California Regional Awards.

Exploring kink since 1993, active in BDSM and the Leather Community since 1996,  and presenting classes since 1998, she speaks at Leather, BDSM and Kink events across the US,  Europe and Canada on many Leather and BDSM focused topics. She also brings the knowledge on Kink, BDSM and Leather to such august institutions of higher learning as SF and Cal State, Harvard, Princeton,Yale, Stamford, and Brown for IvyQ. She has been invited to present this fall for MIT.


Mollena's been sober since 3-14-2007 and  in December that same year,  she founded "Safeword," a 12-step based recovery group for all kinksters seeking recovery from addiction.

International Ms Leather 2010 was truly an international title year with visits to the Pride Festival in Stockholm, Sweden, where she made history as the first Leatherwoman ever invited to march with the venerable Scandinavian Leathermen’s Association!  She’s also done her thing in Dublin, Ireland, Berlin, Germany, the UK: toured Amsterdam, Netherlands for Leather Pride,  as well as teaching and performing in Vancouver, Canada. A roll-up of her epic IMsL 2010 title year can be found here!

A founding member of Crowded Fire Theater Company, Mo blogs on http://mollena.com and is the  author of the "Toybag Gude: Taboo Play." Her essays appear in 2 anthologies curated by Rachel Kramer Bussel:  "BDSM and Race Play" appears in "Best Sex Writing 2010," (you can read the Jezebel review here!) and "Kiss my Boots" is featured in  "The Lust Chronicles."  Her challenging essay on “race play” is featured in“Spirit of Desire: Personal Journeys in Sacred Kink” edited by Lee Harrington. Not one but two essays  commissioned by Tristan Taormino appear in the groundbreaking anthology  “The Ultimate Guide to Kinky Sex.”  Mollena is pleased and delighted to be a featured educator with The Kink Academy, where you can see clips of her speaking on various and sundry topics!

Her background includes a lifetime of training and involvement in the performing arts, which include spoken word, classical theater, dance, performance art, and all manner of stagecraft. Her first  solo show,69Stories: One Pervert's Tale has been re-revived and is ready to tour and was a hit in Vancouver in November 2010. You can see an excerpt from it here ("Kiss My Boots" part One,  and  Part Two) as performed at  Rachel Kramer Bussel's In the Flesh storytelling series. She is a favorite at Dixie De La Tour's Bawdy Storytelling, has performed for many storytelling venues including  Bare! Stories, Tiny, Dangerous Fun  Audacia Ray's Red Umbrella Diaries, Carol Queen's Perverts Put Out, and was a guest on Kevin Allison's Risk! Podcast. She has also thrown down onstage for Porchlight Storytelling and is looking forward to an appearance on NPR's Snap Judgement.

She is also a columnist for SexIs Magazine, where she lets loose twice a month on just about anything. Stay tuned for her podcasts on Erotic Awakening, too! She’s a founding member of San Francisco’s Crowded Fire Theater Company and her blog, The Perverted Negress is at mollena.com

As a model, Mollena has been featured on the Folsom Street Fair 2010 Poster, as well as modeling for Stormy Leather.  She has worked with many well-known and renowned kink, Leather and fetish  photographers, including Stacie Joy, Laren Leland, Aeric Meredith-Goujon,  Melvin Moten, Don Sir and  Michele Serchuk: who's photograph of Mollena posing with fellow educator Graydancer was featured in the Seattle Erotic Arts Festival 2010.

She is chuffed to have been interviewed for the Leather Archives & Museum's Women's Leather History Project. Recent interviews with Mo can be found on Jezebel and on Princeton University's Equal Writes website. You can also read her 2010 interview with SexisIs Magazine. She was featured in a groundbreaking interview at TheGrio.com on BDSM and race. Her work’s also been published by the Society Of Janus Newsletter,  The Eulenspiegel Society's magazine, Prometheus, as well as the online magazine at ALT.COM and Bondage.com. She has been interviewed for The Bottoming Book, ColorLines Magazine, Bitch Magazine, Abiola Abrams: Love, Sex & Dasting, The Playboy Advisor, Sexploration with Monika and The Reverend Mel Show, SexIs Magazine, The Huffington Post, Jezebel and  Racialicious to name a few! She is featured in the award winning documentary "Vice & Consent". You can also see her all tied up in the instructional video, "Jay Wiseman Teaches Rope Bondage"

 

Her blog, The Perverted Negress, has been a featured blog on Fleshbot (not Once but TWICE!) as well as the pick of the week for The Sugasm. And boy howdy, the venerated Jane's Guide thinks The Perverted Negress' Blog  is pretty rad! Mollena is also a member of Mama's Leather Family (#1231) , formally dubbed "Mama's Perverted Negress" and pinned in at the SF Eagle by Mama Sandy Reinhardt herself.

She Twitters incessantly over on http://twitter.com/mollena, so follow her there!

 

BDSM Classes Offered by Mollena Williams

Twisted Teachings: Class List

 

 NEW!

Ask The Perverted Negress: Q & A with Mo

You wanna know the inside dirt? The tough stuff? The fluff stuff? The airspeed of an unladen swallow? How it feels to be a slave? What the hell is up with the cute animal photos? Ask her anything. Of course, she may not answer, she may start pulling responses from her ass, but the absolute guarantee is you’ll be immersed in her world and maybe learn a thing or two!


Care & Feeding of The Monoamorous: A Primer for the Polyamorous

Monogamous / Polygynous/ Polyamorous / Monoamorous / Open/ Closed…however you self-identify, you may well find yourself attracted to or looking at a relationship with someone who isn’t an exact alignment with your default relationship style. Is this match-up doomed to failure? Are you setting yourselves up for disappointments? Well, I don’t think so. Join me for a discussion on how mono/poly relationships CAN work and thrive…and glean from the experience from someone who, despite identifying as monoamorous, has had wonderful relationships with polyamorous and non-monogamous folk. We will discuss pitfalls and perks, triumphs & tribulations, and take a look at how to co-exist peacefully and successfully as we all work towards improved communications and deeper connection.


Finding, Vetting and Hiring the Right Dominant for YOU

Oftentimes, we hear of dominants and masters placing a potential submissive or slave “under consideration:” this indicating that there is a trial period where the dominant type person gauges suitability and decides whether or not the s-type person is “worthy” of the honor of being owned. But what about the other way around? Is it not also the responsibility of the submissive or slave to ascertain “worthiness,” insure the are giving themselves over to a suitable partner, and ready to take this important step?

Finding a good match in the Default World is tough. Adding on the layer of PE (Power Exchange) dynamics can make this a truly overwhelming prospect. It is vital that submissives and slaves take a responsible, clear-eyed approach to negotiation submission and slavery. In this session, we will discuss the role of self-esteem in choosing the best dominant or master for you

You, dear submissive and slave, are your most valuable commodity: are you taking care to hand yourself over to someone who will care for you?


Dominance & Submission: Hot Fiction, Hotter Facts!

Many of us have hot fantasies of giving over control or taking charge in the bedroom. for some, these desires are so sexually charged that the lure of dominance and submission becomes . But how do you go from an egalitarian relationship to one where someone calls the shots? how do you manage to be dominant without being domineering? is it possible to be submissive without being spineless? how do you negotiate this delicate dance of power without pissing everyone off?  and do we REALLY need if you’re curious about dominance and submission, or have been exploring power exchange and are looking for new insights into your play, welcome! in this class, we will explore different types of PE (Power Exchange) relationships, from top and bottom to dominant and submissive to master and slave in all of the wonderful variations! We will be covering many of the intricacies of managing these dynamics such as:

Whether you’re interested in the private intimacy of bedroom play or wish to delve into the broader kink community, you’ll have a safe space to ask your questions, discuss your desires, and kick around your kinks! Bring your questions, concerns, curiosities and an open mind!


Beyond ’50 Shades of Gray’ – Dominance and Submission in a Technicolor World

Have you fantasized about rough sex, about taking control of your lover, about relinquishing yourself to the will of a partner, about the intersection of pain and pleasure? Do you long to experience the sensuality of bondage, or perhaps the emotional thrill of role-playing?  Perhaps you’ve had these fantasies for your entire life and had no idea such wild fantasies could ever be manifested. If could be you’ve read some hot fiction and thought “Yes. This, this is what I need!”  It may well be you’ve been too cautious or hesitant to explore them because you’ve been taught “Only abusers hit people!” or “If you’re submissive you are an emotional doormat.” or “People who engage in BDSM are damaged and emotionally unsafe.”

Join long-time practitioner of Kink, BDSM and member of the Leather Community Mollena Williams, who identifies as a selective submissive, feminist, power slave, masochist, educator and Executive Pervert.  Sexually liberated since her first high school relationship where she explored polyamory and openly kinky since 1993, she travels the world speaking to the kinky and the kink-curious on topics ranging from the basics of negotiation to extreme “edge-play.” This class will help introduce you to some of the groundwork you may wish to undertake before diving into BDSM, ways to examine your own desires and motivations, finding and flirting with potential partners, negotiating for success, and advice about some of the challenges my may well encounter in your journey.  Come explore in a safe and relaxed conversation, bring your questions and curiosities and leave you inhibitions at the door!

NEW!

Slaves & Submissive Safe Space: “Be-In” for Submissives & Slaves

Sometimes? We just need safe space to vent. In the tradition of Viola Johnson’s “Slave Circles,” this guided, moderated discussion will be facilitated to maximize participation, fellowship, sharing and safe space to explore the challenges and triumphs of those who are called to or curious about service, submission and slavery.


From The Slave’s Mouth: Dominance from the Flipside

Perhaps you are curious about exploring your dominant side? Taking control physically in the bedroom, or perhaps dominating your partner beyond your intimate sexual times in ways that engage broader aspects of your lives? Where do you begin? How do you get ‘em to do your bidding? And that eternal question: if the submissive can always say no, who is in charge, really?

Join long-time practitioner of Kink, BDSM and member of the Leather Community Mollena Williams, who identifies as a selective submissive, feminist, power slave, masochist, educator and Executive Pervert.  Sexually liberated since her first high school relationship where she explored polyamory and openly kinky since 1993, she travels the world speaking to the kinky and the kink-curious on topics ranging from the basics of negotiation to extreme “edge-play.” This class will explore the basics of power exchange relationships, ways to consider your motivations, strengths, places where growth is needed, and negotiating power dynamics successfully. Sure, you can get a peer point of view from other dominant types, but here’s your chance to hear from a slave-identified person who has listened to thousands of other slaves and submissives and can share a unique perspective on dominance and mastery.

While geared towards exploring the dominant perspective in power exchange relationships, this class may also be helpful for submissives and slaves interested in clarifying their own needs, wants and desires while seeking or working within a PE dynamic. Bring your questions, experiences, and curiosity!


Self-ish Submission: Why your Needs Should Be Nourished

As submissives and slaves, we often approach our relationships from the viewpoint that the ultimate goal is to meet the needs of our partners, and in that way, have our own needs met. While this seems a lofty goal, fully abandoning one’s own needs and wants may not bring the blissful surrender you seek. Sometimes? We need more. Feedback, affection, focus, attention. In power exchange relationships (Hey, they’re called ”exchange” for a reason!) there needs to be an ebb and flow, a give and take that fulfills all parties involved. Knowing what you need, what it takes to achieve your needs, and expressing them clearly can help you be present and fulfilled in your relationships.

We will discuss ways to handle questions such as determining:

This discussion will revolve around assessing, categorizing prioritizing and supporting your needs and your wants, and discovering what you are…or are not…willing to do to have these met.


Negotiation for the Hopelessly Shy and Terribly Awkward

Negotiation of scenes can be tough on people who are adept at bargaining, expressing their needs, wants, and desires. so how is this gauntlet to be run by those of us perverts who are super shy or kind of awkward when it comes to saying “I need…” or “I won’t…” or giving the dreaded “No.” ??

Join Mollena Williams, Closeted Shy Freak ™ as she shares some techniques that can help even the most awkward kinkster battle their own personal hurdles and insure that your needs are met, your expectations expressed more clearly, and that your scenes are satisfying for all parties! Bring your questions (jot ’em down if you are to shy to ask!) and we’ll brainstorm ways to help you on your own journey to openness, clear communication and awesomeness!


Dungeon Douchebaggery: Spotting, Avoiding, and Refraining from Asshole Behaviours

We’ve all been there. The lout lumbering between top and bottom in the dungeon. The idiot who can’t tell the difference between “dominant and “dominate.” The jerk with a flagrant, tasteless photo of their genitals on their online profile. The douchebag who presumes to lay hands on you because they feel entitled to do so. We’ve all been there…and yes…we’ve all been “that guy” at some point in our kink careers. ‘Fess up! We have all pulled gaffes that we can look back on and shake our heads. But how do you handle this?

What do you do with the persistent douchebag whose behavior seems unchecked? The high-profile douchebag that everyone seems reluctant to confront? How do you handle your behaviour in the face of flagrant douchebaggery, and most importantly, how do we handle our own inner douchebag when they rear their ugly, nozzled head?

This class takes a look at the gamut of idiocy…both ours and others, and examines ways to handle ourselves and others. Turning an awkward situation towards positive outcome or opportunity to educate. Bring your stories, and let’s hash this out! From the silly to the serious, we’ll take a look at how we can manage ourselves, our expectations, and our reactions to Douchebag Deviants.

This class takes a look at the gamut of idiocy…both ours and others, and examines ways to handle ourselves and others. Turning an awkward situation towards positive outcome or opportunity to educate. Bring your stories, and let’s hash this out! From the silly to the serious, we’ll take a look at how we can manage ourselves, our expectations, and our reactions to Douchebag Deviants.


Graceful Exits: How to Minimize Breakup Douchebaggery

It is likely that you’ve dumped or been dumped at some point in your life. Often, we loo back ruefully on our past relationships and ex-loves and wish we’d behaved better…or that they’d been less of a douchebag. Add to this the complication of the insularity of the typical BDSM and Leather community and you have a potential Smörgåsbord of disaster. From running into your former beloved at a Munch to having to grin-and-bear it when they are canoodling next to you in the Dungeon with their newest sweetie, there are many pitfalls to navigate within the fallout of even the more amicable breakups.

How can you minimize damage? Contain fallout? Avoid unnecessary gossip and trash-talking? And what do you do when you step right the hell in it? We are all human (usually) and as such, no matter how hard we try and how well we communicate, there will come the day you wind up dealing with or becoming the “crazy ex” in someones life.

This class takes a look at the thorny problems and possible solutions to Breakup Douchebaggery. We’ll examines ways to handle our emotional and how they might impact others, and vice versa. Turning an awkward painful breakup towards positive outcome or opportunity to grow. Bring your stories, both successful and wince-inducing, and let’s hash this out! From the silly to the serious, we’ll take a look at how we can manage ourselves, our expectations, and our reactions to shakeups and breakups.


Monogamy Without Shame

Ever been the only one standing at a Munch and announcing yourself as “monogamous?” Despairing as profile after profile of people in whom you are interested list them as “polyamorous” and therefore, you feel, out of your potential pool? Have you ever compromised your need for a one-on-one relationship because you thought it would be OK…only to find yourself frustrated and despairing of ever finding that monogamous partner?Come on in out of the cold then! With the broad acceptance of many types of polyamorous love-styles in the BDSM and Leather Life-style, it can, sometimes seem daunting when you are a person who identifies as monogamous. It can be even more challenging wen you realize that Monogamy means different things to different people in different situation! Are you Sexually Monogamous,? Sensually Monogamous? Emotionally Monogamous, Play Monogamous but Emotionally Poly? Emotionally and sexually monogamous but play Poly?

Yep, it gets crazy out there, folks!

But the best way to approach other folks is from your own grounded place. In this session, we’ll discuss what monogamy means, whether or not it is an unattainable myth, and if you have to shun a poly partner out of hand due to irreconcilable differences! Kinksters of all relationship-style identifications are welcome. We all have much to learn from one another, and much more in common that we might think!


Shy Freaks: Exploring BDSM for the Introvert

If the thought of BDSM action gets you hot and bothered but the thought of dropping trou in the middle of a dungeonful of fellow kinksters leaves you cold and queasy, you just might be a shy freak! It is often overlooked than not every kinkster shares exhibitionism as their kink, and those among us who are shy and freaky have a tough row to hoe!

This class explores finding your own boundaries, and will offer some tools for self-assessment. Some shyness is important for self-esteem, and some are hindrances to the same. How do you know if you should push your shyness, or let it sit? What do you do if your partner is a flaming show-off and you like nothing more than a quiet scene at home? And how can you overcome what YOU want to overcome without succumbing to potentially damaging Scene Pressures? All of these questions and more will be explored in a lively and interactive format where even the shyest freaks get their say!


The Lone Ranger: Handling Yourself Whether Alone for the Day or on Your Own for a While

Play parties. Munches. Classes. Kink Conventions. All of these are wonderful ways to learn, network and grow at you explore and experience BDSM. But what happens when you are new to these explorations, and going it on your own? Or find yourself newly single, either again or for the first tie in a long time? It can be tough to walk into a Munch by yourself, to decide to brave a play party, or to travel to a big convention. Yet how else are ya gonna meet new friends and potential partners?

Believe it or not, even seasoned perverts can struggle with this issue. (ahem) You are not alone in feeling lonely. This class will be a discussion of tips and techniques, sharing of anecdotes and a way to access your own hurdles when it comes to being on your own. Whether you are going somewhere without your partner or you are partnerless, the aim here is to give you a handle on your own fears and trepidation, see where you can worth through them, and better understand your way in the world as a solo entity. Being single ain’t easy, and most of us have been there! Learn how to get over yourself and get on out there with a smile on your face!


Playing with Strangers: How to Get It On at a Con!

Whether it is your first of fiftieth time at a BDSM event, it can be intimidating to meet folks. People from Internationally known BDSM Educators to first-time neophytes can run into obstacles of self-esteem, fear of rejection, hell, fear of acceptance! How do you cope with your shyness or awkwardness or just figure out a positive approach to that tasty top of succulent submissive?

This fun and interactive workshop will offer some solutions, hints, tips and tricks for all of those who have ever seen that stranger across a crowded dungeon and longed to connect! We’ll have some exercises, some discussion, and the chance for you to explore what your strengths are, and where you could use a little help making your fantasies a reality!


Strong Slaves, Bodacious Bottoms & Ass-Kicking Submissives: Embracing Dichotomy

Self-identification is difficult for anyone in the alternative lifestyle. It can be even more challenging for people who see themselves as strong in their lives but desirous of submission. There is a great deal of pressure in the BDSM community to “seem submissive,” so what do you do when you see yourself as strong and fierce and yet crave mastery and domination?

Believe me, you are not alone. There are many submissives and bottoms and slaves who are strong and independent and finding their way through the maze of the Kink Community! This class is an intense discussion of self-assessment personal identification, passion and power. From those who struggle with their desire to submit, to those who strive for greater strength of purpose, this class will be a wonderful opportunity to bond with the like-minded and suss out your strength in an open setting. And for tops dominants and masters, this is an excellent opportunity to get into the mind of those who are strong and embrace the dichotomy of strength in submission and freedom in slavery!


Never a “Bad Scene”: Learning from Detours

If you’ve been in the BDSM community for any length of time, you will probably have a situation that takes an unexpected turn. It can be easy to feel “damaged” or even “broken” by difficult scenes. However, isn’t it also possible that even a difficult scene is a learning experience? If not for mistakes, for things going awry, how would we ever learn? Join me in the exploration of the topic of “Bad Scenes” and why I believe this to be an outmoded and ultimately limiting concept. Feel free to bring in your tales of things gone torqued, and let’s see if we can find the silver lining, the hard lesson, or the eventual epiphany that can come from the truly tough exploration of our Kinky Selves!


Boundary Smackdown! Playing Past YOUR “Temperate Zone”

Limits and comfort zones: we’ve all got ‘em. But sometimes you might long for an edgier play, something that genuinely provokes fear and yet evokes fascination. There are many reasons for this, and in this class we’ll discuss them. There are many approaches to this edge, and in this class we’ll find ways to “get over yourself” in order to go deeper within. Whether topping or bottoming in an edgy scene, how do you deal with leaving the known and sailing into the unknown? How do you prepare yourself in the case that you lose your way? How do you recover once you are back from that strange and perilous journey? Take a trip within your own mind and see where you might have room in your play to take that leap into new and exhilarating territory!


What the Fuck Kind of Pervert Are You: Knowing Yourself, Knowing Your Kink

So many of us exploring alternative sexuality do so with little introspection and rusty communication skills. Ask 100 kinksters why they do WIITWD (What It Is That We Do)and you’ll hear fewer coherent responses tan you think. Self-knowledge and the capacity to speak out your fantasies, desires, wants and needs is absolutely necessary. But if you were asked, right now, what your core kinks are…what motivates you…what scares you…what is it you expect to get out of the Scene and what the hell you bring to the tabl. Do you have the language to address these issues?

This discussion will outline the many reasons that self knowledge will help you find a more fulfilling sense of yourself, and attract and maintain more suitable relationships. This class if for everyone from first-time newbie to decades old players: we ALL can benefit from taking a moment to slow our roll and re-examine our role! Through sharing life-experience and helping to guide attendees through their own very personal process, this presentation strives to bring a renewed sense of enthusiasm, introspection, passion and heat to your BDSM by helping you know for yourself, what the hell you’re doing here in the first place!


From the Bottom: A Sub’s Missives

We’ve all been to a rope bondage class and wondered what the stunt bottom was thinking as they were encased in bondage. Perhaps you have scene a piercing demo and wanted to hear the thoughts of the one being pierced and their skin was rended by the cold steel. Or maybe you have witnessed a flogging demo and wanted to hear the inner dialogue of the top and bottom as they play?

So much of BDSM education focuses on technique and safety from the top or dominant perspective. What if you could literally have a “blow by blow” narrative of an experienced bottoming through a real-time scene? This class will allow for a unique window into the heart and mind of a bottom and submissive as they process pain, submit, struggle and finally experience their own journey within a scene.

The class will include discussion about the who / what / where / when / why & how of play from a bottom’s perspective. Then the class will move to a demo, where the bottom is open to and channeling her own experience so that the class is privy to the inner thoughts and experiences. After the demo, there will be time for cool down, chat, and processing of the scene with class attendees. Subjects offered include:

PLEASE NOTE: If you are requesting any of these classes for your organization, consideration must be made as to an appropriate and approved play partner for the class. Please contact Mollena directly with any questions.


Beautiful Intention, Gracious Focus: Bringing Service to Life

Many people aspire to or consider themselves to be “Service Oriented.” But if you ask them what being “In Service” means, you may be in for a rather unfocused response. Ask them precisely what services they bring to the table and often the intention becomes even foggier and more diffuse. On the other side, it is a rare dominant or top who knows what it means to graciously accept service, and exactly what in their life requires the dedication and focus that a submissive or slave can bring to the equation. One of the most basic aspects of service, being reactive to the physical and emotional cues that are an integral part of dominant and submissive relationships, is something often overlooked.

This class will involve exploring exercises in service, attentiveness and non-verbal communication. How clear a communicator are you? How gracefully can you provide service? How artfully can you accept service? You may well be surprised, you definitely will step outside of your accustomed roles, and you most certainly will have an opportunity to reconsider exactly what active service means to you. We’ll look at the poise and beauty of the most simple d/s interaction, and see how even a glass of water can be an emotional journey.


RACE: The Final Frontier

Even the most hardcore Pervert will back away from the topic of Race Play. The idea of playing into stereotypes, slurs, scenes that recall grotesque horrors from some of the darkest moments of human history is, in many folk’s opinions, best left buried un-addressed.

But for those who are drawn to explore deeper and deeper crevasses of our psyche, the desire to explore even that taboo a play style can be compelling. From the man of Jewish descent who wishes to experience domination at the hands of a partner in SS Regalia, to the African American woman who secretly harbors a fantasy of being forced to submit to “the white man” to a Japanese-American who ponders a recreation scene of an WWII internment camp, these desires are not to be closeted in shame, but explored and discussed. Even if you are not desirous of acting, real time, on these fantasies, taking charge of them and letting go of the guilt can be n amazing release. And, if you DO decide to act on these fantasies, you’ll get some tips on how to approach this very edgy play, what to do if things do not fall out as planned, and the pros and cons of doing these scenes in public venues. Expect the unexpected, and prepare to surprise yourself.

PLEASE NOTE: If you are requesting a demo within these classes for your organization, consideration must be made as to an appropriate and approved play partner. Please contact Mollena directly with any questions.


The Siren Song of Oblivion: Why Play on the Edge?

Edge Play is as individual as a fingerprint. A spanking can be a playful, lighthearted exchange or a deep trip that revisits and explores a past abuse. A temporary piercing can be highly erotic…or a close-to-the-bone exploration of a phobia. Even more fascinating, all of these may be true from the perspective of top or bottom. They might even be true for the same person. When kinky folks talk about “Edge Play,” it is about their OWN EDGE that they explore. Bottoms, subs and slaves may experience terror of, and yet feel a compulsion to, explore the aspects of their psyche that terrify and seduce. Tops, dominants and owners have edges too: paying with real rage, real fear, and real predatory behaviors.

But edge play is hot hot hot, and so many Kinksters long to teeter on that brink. Why? Why risk life, heart, soul and limb in the context of risk-aware consensual kink? There are many reasons and in this class, we will explore them. Using her own experiences as a jumping off point, and utilizing a high level of interactivity to glean from attendees what it is that arouses and terrifies, Mo helps you to turn over a few of the logs and rocks in your own head, see what crawls out…and then play with the creepiest of creepy crawlies. Delicious darkness and effulgent transcendence is what we seek when we slip on that Edge.


Taboo Play, and Working Through Extremes

If you have ever had a scene that lured you with the promise of edgy intensity, but wondered if you could handle the situation before, during or afterward, this discussion is for you! We will explore the reasons some people enjoy play that is VERY edgy psychologically, emotionally and physically, and how you can go about making that fantasy a reality. Inherent in this discussion is the level of responsibility of both / all partners, how to manage risk, and how you can support your partner in the aftermath. Edgy play can be hot, and we will look at ways to avoid some common pitfalls, as well as how to recover with grace and honor when things go off of the planned path.

*Please be advised: Some highly controversial scenes (i.e. racial or incest play, weaponry, etc.) will be discussed. Please do not attend if these are outside of your comfort zone. Thank you.


The Psychology of Psychological Play

Bottoms, don’t you just hate it when someone messes with your mind? Or … do you actually love it, just a little … ? Tops, do you get a thrill out of making your bottom squirm, or pulling off a good mindfuck? Come join us as we explore the convoluted paths of psychological play. Not for the faint of heart, our presentation will look at Fear & Terror Play; Rape and/or Abduction Simulation; Interrogation; Humiliation, Objectification, and Degradation; Mindfucks; Playing with Taboos; Fetishism, Roleplay and other delicious mind games.


Selfcare & Aftercare: Who Needs ‘Em?

The intensity of SM play often results in emotional vulnerability for the top and the bottom. Often, the period of “Aftercare” post-scene is intended to provide closure for all parties involved. Though much discussion and lip service is often paid to the importance of aftercare, how many of us insure our emotional needs will be met after the toys are safely packed away? Who among us makes sure that we negotiate aftercare when planning that hot scene? Who among us has walked away with a “less that fulfilled feeling” after a scene, and later realized out aftercare needs weren’t met? How often is the top or dominant’s need for aftercare overlooked? And for goodness sake, what do you do when there is no chocolate to be found??

In this discussion, we will explore the reasons, physiological, psychological and spiritual, that people often need to have a “cooling down” period post-scene. We will explore suggestions for ways to include aftercare in your negotiations, and what to do if you aren’t getting your needs met. We will also investigate the ramifications of scenes that deliberately eliminate the aftercare aspect, and how you might approach processing the energies released within your play when you are left to your own devices. The physical and emotional facets of post scene processing will be discussed, and participant participation will be actively solicited. Please come share your experiences, and open yourself to learn from the practices of other Leatherfolk.


Diplomacy and Tact in D/s Relationships

The minutiae of Dominant Submissive relationships can be glorious, sublime and difficult. We all have issues to navigate, and these issues can color our power exchanges. Submission does not have to cripple your ability to have your needs met. Dominance does not have to transform you into an emotionless juggernaut. The ability to treat people with respect and empathy for their own communicative style is an invaluable asset. Within this seminar, we will discuss the many methods we use to communicate, exploring verbal and non-verbal cues. Learn how to identify your own personal interactive style, and explore the countless ways that power colors our _expression. Learn how to deal with situations where your own style might engender conflict between yourself and your partner. Add tools to your communicative arsenal, enabling you to diffuse tension, have your needs met, and be understood! If this loudmouth NYer can learn “In-Pocket” Formal service, you can be SURE she’s got something to share with you!


Minority Within a Minority: Being a Person of Color in the BDSM Community

While some kinksters embrace their Leather lifestyle with ease and nary a look back, others of us face difficult paths towards the leather lifestyle that are fraught with many pitfalls. One’s religious, cultural and racial heritage can add myriad layers and nuances to the process. Though some may view the Leather Community as a Utopian, Egalitarian enclave, it actually is a microcosm, full of all of the twists, turns, fears and hopes that haunt and inspire the rest of the world.

In this class, we will discuss some of the issues facing minorities as their numbers grow within the public BDSM community. Stereotyping? Racism? Classism? “Not in our Community!” you say? Think again. The instructor will share her own experiences in coming to terms with being a black female with submissive and slave tendencies, and still reconciling those feelings with feelings of isolation, guilt, desire, loss and an intense need to be true to her path. EVERYONE is encouraged to attend; share your experiences or learn about the experiences of others in an open, accepting environment.


Scene Reports: So, Ya Wanna Be a Writer?

We all have moments that resonate for us, that we recall with a gleam in our eye and a tingly feeling elsewhere. And a scene report is a magnificent way to share this wonder with your partner, your friends, in a Blog, or a kinky mailing list. But perhaps you do not consider yourself a writer, or you just don’t think you have anything interesting to share. In the course of this hands-on workshop, Mo will discuss some simple techniques for approaching writing, how you can get your ideas and emotional journeys on the page, and what you can do once you have them there. Using some guided imagery, discussion, and plain old story swapping, we can have fun and delve into the beauty of erotic and hot SM prose. Bring a pen, a pad, and your reminiscences.


Role-Playing: Using Your Head to Get Out of Your Body

Although every child is an expert, as adults we frequently forget how to pretend, play” make-believe “and lose yourself in a story. Sure, you might have the hot fantasy of being an abducted princess or a captured spy, but how do you get past your day-to-day thought process and into to the spirit of this, one of the purest forms of play? How can you dissolve your ego into another character, and what do you do if you just wind up feeling pretty silly? In this class, we will discuss techniques for planning, negotiating and executing role-playing scenes, and how to boost your “other” energy. You’ll have a chance to play some games, to watch some play, and to let yourself go.


Douchebag Deviants

How do you handle the persistent douchebag whose behavior seems unchecked? The high-profile douchebag that everyone seems reluctant to confront? What should your behaviour be in the face of flagrant douchebaggery, and most importantly, how do we handle our own inner douchebag when they rear their ugly, nozzled, head?

This class takes a look at the gamut of idiocy…both ours and others, and examines ways to turn an awkward situation towards positive outcome, or opportunity to educate. Bring your stories, and let’s hash this out! From the silly to the serious, we’ll take a look at how we can manage ourselves, our expectations, and our reactions to Douchebag Deviants.

Negotiating Well With Others… and Yourself

At every turn, kinksters are encouraged to know their needs and limits, express them to partners, and negotiate! negotiate! negotiate! It is common to feel overwhelmed and uncertain how or where to begin, what to bring up or what to focus on – even for the most extroverted pervert.  Let’s take an opportunity to use negotiation as foreplay, self-exploration, and a road map to our most intimate fantasies, and then come back to developing our skills for negotiating with others, whether for play or within relationships.  And there are so many approaches to negotiation we can take!  Remember, negotiation is a practice and takes practice – like Kung Fu for the erotic explorer.  New, experienced, shy, outgoing, top, or bottom, everyone can benefit from negotiating!


Playing Well With Others : A Kink Community Primer

Ever wanted to get involved in the kink community but don’t know where to start? Shy and overwhelmed? Curious about the types of events and get togethers out there in the land of pervyness?  Every event is different, and you deserve to find one that fits you. We’ll look into why folks want to be part of the community (and how that affects your adventure), some of the myths you’ll encounter along the way (from outsiders and kinksters alike), the pitfalls we may encounter, and have fun along the way.  So pull out your social graces, dust off those leather boots (or heels, or sandals), and let’s dive into this foray into kink events and culture.


Shy Freaks: Exploring BDSM for the Introvert

If the thought of BDSM action gets you hot and bothered but the thought of dropping trou in the middle of a dungeonfull of fellow kinksters leaves you cold and queasy, you just might be a shy freak! It is often overlooked than not every kinkster shares exhibitionism as their kink, and those among us who are shy and freaky have a tough row to hoe!

This class explores finding your own boundaries, and will offer some tools for self-assessment. Some shyness is important for self-esteem, and some are hindrances to the same. How do you know if you should push your shyness, or let it sit? What do you do if your partner is a flaming show-off and you like nothing more than a quiet scene at home? And how can you overcome what YOU want to overcome without succumbing to potentially damaging Scene Pressures? All of these questions and more will be explored in a lively and interactive format where even the shyest freaks get their say!


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The Day After The Ball: What Happens Once you’ve met The One(s) of Your Dreams?

Fairytales do come true….and then you wake up to the reality of day-to-day life. Many of us seek for many long years for ourselves, for our community, for our place, for our match. And then we realize, once we have found these magical people places and things, that the journey is only just beginning. How do you cope with bringing fantasy into reality in the BDSM and Leather lifestyle? What happens when the fantasy evaporates into a reality that can simultaneously exhilarate and disappoint?

Join Mollena and Herr Meister, newly wed and in a committed, 24/7 power exchange relationship, for a discussion on negotiating the opening movements of a master and slave dynamic. These are beautiful and challenging relationships. Power exchange is hot…and difficult. We’ll talk about negotiation, honesty, transparency, contracts, protocol, how it works when it doesn’t quite work and how you know when you’re doing it right!


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Rising to the Challenge of Leading While Submissive

Some of us come into the world of Leather, Kink and BDSM young and fresh-faced, some after many decades of searching, and everything in-between. It isn’t uncommon for someone with more years in the trenches to partner with someone with greater experience. This is often seen as good and right….until you have a submissive or slave with more experience than their dominant and owner. It can be a question of ego, of protocol of perception, of pride, but it can be tough as hell to feel as though your slave, your sub, your bottom, is calling the shots because they have a greater breadth of experience!

Join Herr Meister, new to the BDSM community but a veteran of a lifetime of longing – and Mollena, a lifelong freak and 20+ year veteran of Power Exchange relationship, to explore how you can navigate this minefield, what happens when you step on the inevitable ego grenade, and how truly beautiful trust and love can be, regardless of whether you wear your hanky on the left, right or middle!


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Ask Herr Meister & Mollena: A Candid Q&A

Ever wanted to know what it is like to be in a 24/7 power exchange dynamic? What is it like to give oneself entirely to the will of someone else? How does it feel to be responsible for the emotional physical, spiritual, financial and mundane needs of another human being? And what the hell was REALLY up with the “Edelweiss” thing?

With over two decades of experience, Mollena’s been around the block a few times. With about two years of experience, the BDSM lifestyle is quite new to Herr Meister, despite longing for a world he never imagined even existed, let alone could be his. This is a rare opportunity to pick the brains and hear the stories from two very very different humans who found one another, found love, and found their way to a path that they joyously share with the world.