77.24 Library

656. I am down at the main public library in downtown Jacksonville.  Working without a home base is easy.

657. The library gives you 45 minutes, but you can continue on if no one is waiting.  I was able to access my Google Drive and A2 Hosting.

658. When I returned home, after walking and riding, my blood sugar was down to 82.  It’s obvious that the way to keep it down is meds, diet, and exercise.  I did pig out after that.

659. Kaizen

The Big Idea – Create a culture of continuous improvement where all employees are actively engaged in improving the company. Nurture this culture by organizing events focused on improving specific areas of the company.

Kaizen (Continuous Improvement) is a strategy where employees at all levels of a company work together proactively to achieve regular, incremental improvements to the manufacturing process. In a sense, it combines the collective talents within a company to create a powerful engine for improvement.

Forget to stop.

IBM* Reboot

At age 65, it’s amazing how often I have to reboot and clean up my bad habits.  You would think I would have learned by now.

Over my adult life, I have been exposed to countless self-help books, which might help if I actually did what they recommended.  No such luck.

Some books like “Think and Grow Rich” are just idiotic.  If that plan worked, we would all be healthy, wealthy, and wise, since we have all read that book.  Maybe more than once.

Underneath all the positive thinking shams lies a stinking feeling that maybe you’re not good enough.  Maybe I had the confidence to take on the challenges of life 20 or 30 or 40 years ago, but a string of divorces and business failures have left me bitter and beaten like a drum.

Somehow I have lost my ability to evaluate my situation.  I want to compare my lot in life to others I have known.  Or I look at my life now and wonder how I flat out destroyed golden opportunities that were already in my hands.

We have all learned to substitute the judgement of others for our own.  If someone else says that we are doing the right thing, we are proud and believe them.  But how often does that happen?

Most likely, someone disapproves of our actions, and we take that as gospel.  We forget the old adage that opinions are like assholes.  Everyone has one.  And most of them stink.

I choose the IBM* (Introvert Boomer Male) Reboot quite frankly because I am one.  I share these ideas as I walk the walk.  Theory alone will not help, especially as that light at the end of the tunnel gets brighter every day.

As baby boomers, we’re not done yet.  Not by a long shot.

I don’t know where feelings of insecurity and low self-esteem crept in.  But it doesn’t matter.  You can only begin a journey from where you are at today.  I will share tips and techniques and strategies and rituals I use to maximize my health, wealth, and relationships.  

These techniques may work for you.  They may not.  Every individual has their own set of problems and self-inflicted wounds.  Mine include problems like diabetes and a bad marriage to get out of.  I don’t know which is worse.

Your problems can be anything from taking care of elderly parents to obesity to being flat broke.  Only you know.

What will can all do is address these issues:

1. Reboot your lifestyle, or life theme, and start living the life you desire.

2. Overcome fears that you are too old to make changes, or you are defective and not good enough.

3. Learn to trust yourself and build a group of people around you who share your trust.

4. Face fears of rejection and insecurity and crush them once and for all.

5. Stop comparing yourself to others and be the best you you can be.

6. Break the cycle of self-defeat and failure that is causing you unnecessary pain.

7. Build the perfect you one small action at a time.

8. Achieve satisfaction and fulfillment in your personal relationships.

If you feel stuck in your life without appealing prospects on the line, this ebook is for you.  The road to recovery and reboot is a wonderful path, and I welcome the company and accountability.

A series of barriers stands between us and the life theme we desire.  We have erected obstacles to deal with stress, fear, and insecurity.  Your objective is to break through these negative mindsets creating havoc in your life.

6 Barriers:

1. blaming others for your problems

2. tried to change but failed

3. tried to make changes alone without asking for help

4. you don’t believe you deserve success

5. escape strategies seem to work for you

6. you are inconsistent with your actions and habits

For whatever reasons, we often fall into a negative mindset that tells us we are not good enough.

Maybe we have slipped into self-destructive habits like addiction which damages self-esteem and kills confidence.

I used to not understand these addictions.  It reminds me of the television show My 600 lb. Life.  You have grossly obese men and women who cannot stop stuffing huge amounts of food in their faces.  They hope for a quick fix, like gastric bypass.  Sad.

Then I look at my own Type II Diabetes.  At least once a week, I find myself jonesing for sugary carbs.

I never met a cake, pie, cookie, donut, or flavor of ice cream I don’t like.

Ben and Jerry are my two favorite Yankees.

For Girl Scout Thin Mint Cookies, a serving size is a sleeve.

I know what I need to do to control my blood sugar levels and to reverse diabetes.  Cut the carbs.  Exercise.  That’s it.

But I don’t want to do it.  I am addicted to sugar.  Going to the gym is a chore.  So is passing by the bakery section in the grocery store.

Giving up your comfortable yet self-destructive mindset is even more important.

Most of us struggle with one or more negative patterns.  These patterns cause us to act out destructively in ways that are not in our self-interest.

Negative habits may include alcohol, overeating, and compulsive spending.  Even “sex addiction”.

The first step in breaking these negative patterns is to find out where you are now.

You may be telling lies to yourself, like:

        - I’m boring.

        - I’m ugly.

        - I don’t have what it takes.

        - I’m not smart enough.

        - I’m not liked.

        - I’m a failure.

        - I’m worthless.

        - I’m better off alone.

And many more.

Our goal is to shed these worn out beliefs and to blaze a new trail.  You are now taking a new path to a better life.  You are rebooting the way you think, act, and behave.

IBMs have to personal power to change at any time.  Instead of being a victim and blaming others, taking total responsibility for everything in your life is the foundation of personal freedom.

Bad events may not be my fault, but I am responsible anyway for everything in my life.  The way I cope is by practicing ho’oponopono.

Hoʻoponopono (ho-o-pono-pono) is a Hawaiian practice of reconciliation and forgiveness. Similar forgiveness practices are performed on islands throughout the South Pacific, including Hawaii, Samoa, Tahiti and New Zealand. Traditional Hoʻoponopono is practiced by Indigenous Hawaiian healers, often within the extended family by a family member.” ~ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ho%CA%BBoponopono

You can use the steps in any order, but this is the mantra I use:

1. I Love You

2. I’m Sorry

3. Please Forgive Me

4. Thank You

With or without ho’oponopono, you accept total responsibility for your life.  The mantra is cleansing.  Everything that happens to you is a direct result of your actions.  

When you hold onto the pains of the past, you are the only one who suffers. Clean.

An IBM Reboot is all about exercising personal power and has nothing to do with other people.  Ho’oponopono is about forgiveness.  You forgive others by forgiving yourself.

If rock bottom is where you find yourself, that’s where you begin.

As introverts, we often prefer dealing with adversity by avoiding the issues.  Confrontation is not in our DNA.  We avoid painful situations and seek an escape route.  The more committed we are to escape, the less likely we are to develop a healthier way of life.

Avoiding your issues just creates more issues.  Yet we do it anyway.  We escape to avoid experiencing pain over and over.

Three avoiding techniques include denial, resentment, and complaining.  I would also add passive aggressive resistance, a form of resentment.  My personal favorite.

Understanding your escape strategies is key to stopping them.  But passive aggressive against real and imagined enemies is just so sweet.

We have so many distractions and devices available to help us escape.  I rely on a dvr and television.  How old school?  I plain love news shows and dramas like Criminal Minds and NCIS.  The TV runs 24/7 as background noise but remains a distraction.  For others it might be alcohol or Internet porn.

As IBMs, we have an obligation to fix ourselves, and maybe in the process, we will right the country.  We must identify our distractions and take steps to eradicate them one by one.

As introverts, do we avoid social situations due to a fear of rejection?  Does fear keep us from taking on new challenges?  Or are we too old and too tired to take on anything other than correcting our own faults?

Avoidance inevitably leads to procrastination.  Suffered from it my whole life, but I don’t consider it evil.  Procrastination can lead to not doing jobs that really didn’t need to be done.

If you are procrastinating because you are stuck, that’s a different story.  Mostly due to depression.  You might be out of a job, have no prospects, and have no pussy beside you to alleviate your frustrations.

The Stoic solution is to take one action at a time, no matter how small.  Daily.  

Depression can keep you in bed in the morning.  Do one thing to get the momentum going.  It becomes a habit that can become a part of your personal rituals.

Being an IBM means addressing your personal health, wealth, and relationship issues.  Each part overlaps the other.  A huge factor in wealth is anytime, anywhere income.

For AAI, one action a day will build a huge authority website over time.  Think about it.  One old fashioned article a day - spun - and promoted using Magic Submitter can build a full time income in 90 days.

Without a full time side hustle income, it’s impossible to find the perfect woman who will put up with your shit and give you what you need at the same time.  And without money, you may not get the best medical care in your time of need.

I hate talking about self-esteem.  Actually, I hate listening to others talk about it.  I’ll keep it short.

Low self-esteem means you’re “not good enough”, or that you are inferior to other people.


Whenever I hear about public schools more concerned about children’s self-esteem over math, I want to puke.  Let a child master math, and the self-esteem will follow.

But we are IBMs, dammit.

Even after a lifetime of tearing ourselves down, it’s not permanent unless you allow it to  be.  You can reverse the effects of low self-esteem and feel great about yourself no matter what your personal challenges have been.

Confidence comes from manning up.  At least taking on whatever we can at this age.

The beauty of retirement or partial retirement is having the time to eat right, exercise, go to the gym, and get a good night’s sleep.  Most family pressures are gone.  Kids are grown.

What I don’t get is my own reluctance to live a clean life.  I have the time.  I know what to do.  I just don’t always do it.  This coasting through life makes no sense.  We have so little time left.

Low self esteem creeps into your psyche over time in various forms:

1. perfectionism

2. fear of taking risks

3. letting others make decisions for you

4. being passive instead of decisive

5. fear of criticism and ridicule

6. general negativity and social withdrawal

7. a feeling of not being good enough

8. constant self-critical chatter in your brain

9. when someone praises you, you play it down

10. you minimize your successes while maximizing your failures

11. you give up more easily when encountering obstacles or failure

12. start looking at the world in a negative way

At times, we have all fallen prey to self-doubt and plain old fear.  As IBMs at this place in American history, we have a unique opportunity to reboot, and to rewrite our destiny.

Overcoming these problems presents a dilemma not unlike what is faced by doctors and modern medicine.

Doctors are trained to look at symptoms their patients present, run tests to gain more information, diagnose the illness, and prescribe a course of treatment to include drugs and lifestyle changes.

Alternative health care practitioners, or natural healers, so much the same thing.  They look at any physical manifestations and the patient’s habits, and make a treatment plan of food and lifestyle changes to make the patient well over time.

I’m not one to criticise either approach.  If I have an acute illness, or my appendix just burst, I want that M.D.  

If I have a general feeling of malaise, it may take deeper investigation by a natural healer to set me out in the right direction to health.

Life is not either/or.

Negative thinking is a learned behavior.  It’s a condition of life.  Fight or flight.  With all the extroverts in the world telling us we have to engage in positive thinking, it’s a wonder we don’t beat ourselves up every time a negative thought invades our mind.

Whether you look to the Stoics, the Code of Bushido, or just your own life experiences, you can begin now and where you are to build you life theme.

1. draw a line in the sand

You have habits and bad actions you can no longer do.  For me, sugar can no longer be a part of my life.  If I eat that cookie or donut or bowl of ice cream, I’m likely to follow it up with bread and pasta and rice.  All carbs that will shoot my blood sugar up.

This is a line I have been forced to draw for myself to control and maybe even reverse diabetes.

Some people use this in relationships.  You may be putting up with more crap from a wife or girlfriend than you ever believed you would tolerate.

No pussy is that good.

I personally believe if things have gotten that bad, the best strategy is to walk away.  If she shows no respect for you and what you do for your family, find another woman who meets your needs.  You need Ms. Right Now, not Ms. Right Forever.


I know of no definition of freedom better than stated by the late Harry Browne:

“Freedom is the opportunity to live your life as you want to live it.”

Change will be a lifelong process.  Habits and rituals have to be a result of your conscious intentions, not something you fell into.  You want to concentrate on any health, wealth, or relationship issues that are giving you grief.

It’s difficult to focus on all three areas at the same time.  If you’re low on money, you will likely ignore your health, and delay working on a new love interest.

In my case, I have to concentrate on controlling my blood sugar/diabetes first.  If I down a pizza, and my blood sugar spikes, I can be certain that work will take a hit.

I have to be aggressive in fighting my sugar cravings.  If I don’t fight diabetes first, work and relationships suffer.

A Little BS (bushido)

The way of the warrior.  I don’t know how much warrior I have left in me.  What bushido really means is having that warrior discipline.

The code has been simplified to 7 virtues:

  1. rectitude
  2. courage
  3. benevolence
  4. respect
  5. honesty
  6. honor
  7. loyalty

Of these seven virtues, the last one is lost forever.  Companies used to hire, and you could work pretty much forever unless you screwed up or quit.  Workers were loyal to their companies, and the companies promoted from within.

My Blood Sugar Control Method:

I have Type II Diabetes.  It sucks.

Why?  It doesn’t hurt.  I want to gorge on sugar and sweets and bread and pasta.  I have seldom met a pie I didn’t like.

But I’m an addict.  If I break my code of eating real food, I don’t stop with one cookie or one bowl of ice cream.  

To me, a serving size of Girl Scout Thin Mint Cookies is a sleeve.  For Ben & Jerry’s, it’s a pint minimum.  Who are these label makers kidding?  I have known people who can stop at a couple of cookies, I’m just not one of them.

For these next 9 months during my personal Seal training, I will let my glucose readings control my diet.  This is my plan.  I am not a doctor.  If you try something similar, put on your big boy pants and take responsibility for your health.  

If you need to, check with your personal physician or health care providers.  I am sharing what I am doing, not giving any medical advice.  Stop being a victim and a pussy.

Here goes:

  1. check my blood sugar when I wake up
  2. if over 100, only water, tea, coffee, and exercise until the number comes down
  3. when the number is right, eat real food you know will not spike your sugar

There isn’t a diabetic alive that doesn’t know what is a proper diet.  Cut out the sugar and processed wheat.  Give up sodas and calorie laden juices and drinks.  Get sufficient protein and fats.  Eliminate unnecessary carbs.

What it comes down to is this:  fast until your blood sugar is under control.

Then eat low carb foods.