00:07
ITME!!
InCo: Season 2 Episode 28: Time
00:19
ANDROID 1
How are you feeling today, prince Hatov?
00:23
HATOV
How long have I been here?
00:24
ANDROID 1
How long do you think you’ve been here?
00:26
HATOV
I don’t know, that’s why I’m asking.
00:30
ANDROID 1
You arrived here two imperial days ago
00:33
HATOV
It feels like I (beat, shakes his head, ruffles hair) I can’t keep track of it (beat, quietly) I (beat) I have a window, so why?
00:47
If only I were closer to the ground.
00:50
ANDROID 1
Prince Hatov that is unsafe.
00:53
HATOV
Don’t call me that. Just Hatov is fine.
00:55
ANDROID 1
Prince Hatov
00:57
HATOV
(distractedly)
Call me something else, I'm not feeling very princely right now
01:00
ANDROID 1
Hatov
01:02
HATOV
A prince would be allowed to leave the room at the very least, I need a new title. Do you have any in mind?
01:12
ANDROID 1
(beat)
How are you feeling?
01:14
HATOV
Oh, you’re filling out your checklist aren’t you? I didn’t even realize that was something androids did until I left.
01:22
ANDROID 1
Did you come into contact with other androids?
01:25
HATOV
They’re not as ubiquitous as the union made them sound.
01:28
ANDROID 1
I’m sorry you feel misled
01:31
HATOV
No you’re not. Do you know what happens to liars on Eolara?
01:37
ANDROID 1
I do not know.
01:39
HATOV
Nothing, nothing happens to them. At least, not in this world, but the union was never very interested in the goddess was it?
01:48
ANDROID 1
How are you feeling?
01:50
HATOV
Take a seat, talk to me. It’s boring here and I can’t (beat) time is (beat) I can’t hold onto it. (beat) and it’s frustrating.
02:03
ANDROID 1
What would you like to talk about?
02:04
HATOV
(beat)
I don’t know, you decide.
02:07
ANDROID
How are you feeling?
02:09
HATOV
Boring! I am done with your goddess forsaken lists.
02:12
ANDROID
Then what would you like to talk about?
02:14
HATOV
Did you know that I'm not supposed to be alive?
02:17
ANDROID 1
There has been no indication that
02:19
HATOV
I’m not even supposed to be breathing right now, she was right about that.
02:25
ANDROID 1
Who is she?
02:26
HATOV
The first person other than Wilm to actually talk to me.
02:30
ANDROID
Can you tell me more about her?
02:32
HATOV
I don’t want to. I haven’t decided what’s happened with her either. Did you know that in the palace nobody actually cares about you?
02:41
ANDROID
Are you sure you do not wish to speak more about your friend?
02:47
HATOV
Friend? (long pause)
02:48
ANDROID
Can you tell me more about her?
02:50
HATOV
No (beat) I know what you meant. It’s just (beat) I don’t know (beat) I want to be friends with her, but (beat) how do you make friends?
03:03
ANDROID
I’m sorry, I do not have any relevant data.
03:08
HATOV
Yes (beat) well (beat) I don’t have any either. My brother was the closest I got to one and (beat) that sad, that’s sad isn’t it?
03:19
ANDROID
Does it make you feel sad?
03:22
HATOV
(beat)
I don’t know. I don’t know what to think about a lot of things.
03:27
ANDROID
If you are not sad, then the situation is not sad.
03:35
HATOV
(beat) I feel so slow since I got here, do you have any idea why?
03:41
ANDROID
Yes
03:46
HATOV
I should have known that you did. You know everything. Well, what is it, why am I so (beat) slow?
03:53
ANDROID
I am unable to share that information.
03:56
HATOV
What?
03:57
ANDROID
I am unable to share that information.
04:01
HATOV
Why not?
04:03
ANDROID
You do not have permission to access that information.
04:06
HATOV
Okay (beat) well let’s play a game. Games are fun. You know how to play games, right?
04:12
ANDROID
I don’t have any experience with games.
04:16
HATOV
That’s okay, sit, sit.
04:21
ANDROID
What game would you like to play?
04:24
HATOV
It’s one I made up. I used to play it all the time on the ship (beat) I call it, eh...code (beat) something (beat, long pause) I should have called it fault finding.
04:41
ANDROID
What are the rules?
04:43
HATOV
What are you talking abou-?
04:44
ANDROID
What are the rules to the game?
04:48
HATOV
Oh, yes. Answer my questions the best that you can and if I get frustrated I lose.
04:55
ANDROID
I am
04:56
HATOV
Do you have the ability to monitor my vital signs?
04:59
ANDROID
Yes
05:02
HATOV
Then, if my heart rate goes above whatever threshold you’ve observed I lose.
05:07
ANDROID 1
I am not meant to
05:08
HATOV
You’re here to serve me, right?
05:12
ANDROID 1
That is my secondary directive.
05:15
HATOV
And your primary?
05:18
ANDROID 1
To find all answers to the questions on my checklist.
05:24
HATOV
Then, if I lose, I will answer three of your questions.
05:28
ANDROID
Okay.
05:30
HATOV
Are you ready?
05:31
ANDROID
Yes.
05:32
HATOV
Yes! Okay, why do I feel heavy?
05:35
ANDROID
I am unable to answer that question.
05:38
HATOV
Okay (beat) are they putting something into my food?
05:41
ANDROID 1
Your meals are prepared by a
05:43
HATOV
No (beat) I mean (long pause) goddess what do I mean?
05:49
ANDROID 1
I am unsure.
05:51
HATOV
Ehm (beat) are they placing any (beat) drugs that, that might cause this into my food?
05:58
ANDROID 1
No
06:00
HATOV
Are they placing drugs in my water?
06:02
ANDROID 1
No
06:06
HATOV
What about the (beat) the air? Is there a drug in the air?
06:09
ANDROID 1
I am unable to answer that question
06:13
HATOV
(beat) you really are just like her. Is there something in the air making me feel (beat) heavy?
06:19
ANDROID 1
I am unable to answer that question
06:23
HATOV
(cursing quietly in Eolaran)
What is the composition of the air in the room?
06:28
ANDROID 1
The air is comprised of 30 percent dioxygen, 30 percent nitrous oxide, and 40 percent dinitrogen.
Silence
ANDROID 1
Is there something you are unhappy with?
06:47
HATOV
Hmm? Well (beat) it (beat) sure (beat) I can’t (beat) ehm. (long pause) Sorry, I (beat) what were we talking about?
06:59
ANDROID 1
We were determining whether or not you were unhappy with the chemical makeup of the air in the room.
07:02
HATOV
What is it?
07:04
ANDROID 1
What is what?
07:06
HATOV
(annoyed)
The chemical make-up of the air
07:08
ANDROID 1
The air is comprised of 30 percent dioxygen, 30 percent nitrous oxide, and 40 percent dinitrogen.
07:19
HATOV
(whimsically)
Nitrous Oxide, nitrous oxide, nitrous oxide, that (beat) that’s not supposed to be there, is it?
07:25
ANDROID 1
It is meant to be there.
07:27
HATOV
That’s (beat) What does it do?
07:30
ANDROID 1
Nitrous Oxide is a sedative and is known to decrease anxiety.
07:34
HATOV
(beat)
Can you tell them to stop (beat) I don’t like it.
07:37
ANDROID 1
Your request has been noted.
07:39
HATOV
Will you tell them?
07:41
ANDROID 1
Your request has been noted. It appears that I have won the game. Would you please answer the first three questions on my list.
07:58
ITME!!
This episode was made by the ItMe! Podcast Production LLC, yeah you heard that right and of course All voices were done by (beat) me. If you miss me between updates, follow me on twitter @incopodcast or at incopodcast.com for sound effect lists, blog posts, world building, mini episodes, and more. The music this episode was accralate by Kevin McLoed under the creative commons license. If you want to support the show, leave a review or comment or consider stopping by my Kofi linked in the description. I’d love to hear from you. Stay safe. And as always, thank you for listening