Relational Networks
Building stronger networks by building better relationships
3rd October 2023
Notes
How do you ‘sell’ the importance of networks and put relationships at their heart?
What assumptions are we working with, and how might we disrupt them?
What are some of the ‘costs’ of relationship-centred practice?
What role do boundaries play in relational working?
What’s our role in facilitating relationships as ‘network managers’?
Highlights from the chat box
On being resolute:
“At a first meeting in a specific community last week we used the question: “if you were PM for the day what law would you change?” There were moans and groans but we persevered and everyone took part. It was really revealing, I think there’s something about being resolute about the benefits and discoveries that can unfold
On bandwidth and time:
“That quote from earlier about "not having enough time" - I wonder is sometimes an acceptable way of expressing "I am at capacity I can't take anything else on" speaking to the vulnerability/emotional labour of getting close to others?”
We hear people sometimes say that they don't have the "bandwidth" to think and work relationally. This is a bit different from "I don't have the time". It's something about emotional energy to take on something different. They are not necessarily short of time but they are at the limits of their emotional capacity
I have a suspicion that another reason someone might feel they ‘don’t have time’ is that they haven’t been introduced to critical reflection practices, or don’t feel they are supported or have agency to spend time reflecting on their work and what they give their time to. It’s so hard to say no to meeting requests, but I am getting better at knowing which are so far off beam in relation to my focus and direction that I am developing ways to divert them.
I can’t shake the idea that cracking the ‘time’ nut holds a key for a more relationship-centred world… I enjoy Oliver Burkeman’s take on time in his 4000 Weeks book (ironically I haven’t found the time to read it but I have listened to many hours of interviews with him!) https://www.theguardian.com/books/2021/aug/16/four-thousand-weeks-time-and-how-to-use-it-by-oliver-burkeman-review
On ‘productivity’:
“This is such a thought provoking set of questions. I sit here being like ‘yeah yeah yeah, relational working I get it’ and then these questions come along and I realise how ‘inappropriate’ so much of the relational work that I think matters was beaten out of me in the early stages of ‘professional life’”
“I feel a real kinship with what you are saying - what does productivity/activity and impact really mean (or is of real value) when it comes to creating and maintaining a community network? Have been saying to many people I know in my community to remember that the 'process is not the mission' as a best reminder for me to describe what you are describing far more fluently!”
“I’m really excited to find this network of relational practitioners and to understand that that’s what I do!”