On the night of Saturday, 16th March 2024, I was sexually assaulted by Puzzle Kingdom GB’s former lead, Aspen (@tgirl.store). While my dissociative amnesia from the event, in addition to the large quantity of alcohol that was bought for me by Aspen, may be preventing me from providing a full account of what happened, I endeavour to provide as detailed a report as I can.

Despite initially reporting the incident to Puzzle Kingdom (@puzzlekingdom.gg, @puzzlekingdom.co.uk) staff, they halted the investigation as they felt they were unable to continue (see the following screenshot from an inside source) and banned both of us from Puzzle Kingdom servers for a period of one year. Victims should not be made to feel like they are at risk of consequences for good-faith reporting of rape, sexual assault, or sexual harassment. Nor should they be made to feel at fault for the deeply traumatic experiences they had.

Chronologically speaking it’s best to start explaining from Saturday, 25th February 2024, when I met Aspen at the Stride 2024 LAN event in London. Aspen seemed like a well-to-do person and worked with me to keep the event running smoothly. That night we shared my hotel room due to one of the people she was supposed to be sharing a room with (Person C) having some mental health difficulties, this individual was looked after by a third person staying in that room (Person B). We talked most of the night, unable to sleep mainly due to our shared concern for Person C.

We did not share a room the following night, though Aspen and I had spent time in the room she shared with Person B and Person C cuddling. We were both tired, no alcohol had been consumed, and both Aspen and I were comfortable with this (see excerpt).

Me, Aspen, Person B and Person C arranged to meet up in Southampton three weeks later. I was initially very reticent to share a sleeping area with Aspen, because I suspected she wanted more than just a platonic relationship, but after persuasion from Person B I relented so that Person C could stay at Person B’s house.

With hindsight, I should have trusted my gut on this, but until Saturday, 16th March, I had no way of telling for sure that Aspen was looking for more than just platonic friendship.

On the night of Friday, 15th March, I arrived safely in Southampton, having been driven by Person B from a train station. We immediately sought to go drinking on arrival, and after only 3 or 4 ciders I was already unsteady on my feet, this was less than the quantity of alcohol Aspen purchased for me to drink on the Saturday night.

On the Saturday evening, I was already an emotional and physical wreck before having consumed any alcohol, due to the long day spent on my feet for a shopping trip, and trying on more feminine clothes in a public environment. I was persuaded that I would feel fine after a few drinks, and went with Aspen to a bar. In hindsight, I was not in a suitable state to be drinking alcohol that night but felt pressured to by Aspen.

I made one purchase at that bar, a cocktail each for Aspen and me, totalling £9.90. The other (at least) five rounds were purchased by Aspen and were all cocktails. I don’t recall being much better on my feet on the return journey to Aspen’s house. I had no intention of having a sexual encounter with Aspen upon returning.

After around half an hour of listening to music and fawning over her headphones, the following interaction occurred (paraphrasing):

Aspen makes a joking remark about something, probably my own headset

Lia: “Oomfie please”

Aspen: “I’m pretty sure I’m far more than just one of your followers”

Lia: “I know, but the word has nice mouth feel”

Aspen: “Mouth feel? You haven’t tried me yet!”

I tried to protest that I hadn’t meant anything sexual with my comment, and my memory is still a little hazy on how we got from this to making out - I was fully clothed at the time, and I suspect I was led by Aspen to her bed. At this stage I don’t think either of us were necessarily leading the interaction, which I did not perceive as especially sexually charged, as we had made out previously on the Friday night. This changed drastically when Aspen suggested explicitly that she take the lead of the interaction.

Some of my close friends will know already that I’m not especially pre-disposed to be in charge in the bedroom, and I immediately entered a mental state called “subspace”. In this state, I was substantially more impressionable and was subject to acts I could not have consented to, including the originally suggested oral sex, which is my one of last memories that is more than a still image.

“A scene is a series of pre-negotiated acts/sex acts/BDSM activities that have been fully discussed and agreed upon from beginning to middle to end by all participants.” (Source: Healthline) Aspen and I had not pre-negotiated her pulling my hair, spanking me, choking me, using degrading language, pinching my nipples or touching each other's genitals. Aspen was aware that I was in a more impressionable state at the time and said the following afterwards:

“I could tell // which is why I didn’t like,, just outright stop things for my sake // I didn’t wanna just yank you out of it, that felt cruel” - that is to say Aspen rationally evaluated the situation, decided that my mental state had taken an unexpected turn, and decided that the best thing for me was to continue the sexual interaction. Based on timings of other messages (I sent a song to Aspen to play on Spotify at 0:17am) and the odd recollection that I was crying at around 2:00am, she did this for potentially over an hour (I have a very vague idea that I asked Aspen for the time, but I have no way to confirm this).

I heard first from Aspen, and later was able to recall it properly, that I had referred to Aspen as “mommy” during my time in subspace. I was also able to fully recall an interaction where Aspen pulled me briefly back out of subspace and reminded me I hadn’t asked to call her that. I apologised before she cut me off to say “I didn’t ask you to stop.” I immediately re-entered subspace. Prior to this revelation I was only aware of her expressing her discomfort with this after the fact, for which I was incredibly apologetic (see full messages from 18/03/2024 below).

I vividly remember crying after the interaction, but I didn’t fully understand what had happened at the time and lacked the capability to properly express my feelings, especially that I wanted to put my clothes back on, and drink some water.

On the following day (Sunday, 17th March 2024), I was first reminded of what happened during the incident when Aspen “bottom-shamed” me (a term used to describe mockery for a submissive sexual disposition) at lunch with Persons B and C. Confused, I texted her under the table, where she made the following comments:

At the time I was still largely unaware of what had happened other than these two interactions Aspen had mentioned, her “mouth feel” comment, and making out before my drop into subspace.

As suggested by the screenshot on the previous page, we talked about this properly the following night. A full copy of our messages is listed below. Please note that at the time of this conversation my understanding of the event was primarily coloured by what Aspen had told me.

With respect to the investigation itself, communication from the investigation team to myself was poor throughout the entire process:

• After initially banning Aspen, the investigators released a statement describing Aspen as needing to “depart” her role as PKGB lead, fuelling unhealthy speculation about the situation, as well as well-wishes to a person I hope you are persuaded did sexually assault me in March, which left me deeply troubled.

• I felt that Puzzle Kingdom was attempting to save face, as they were responsible for appointing Aspen as PKGB’s lead and reporting directly to her partner Azura, which made raising my concerns so difficult in the first place. I was later apologised to for their actions which led to this confusion, though never for this appointment. I apologised to them for my over-reading of this situation.
• The investigating team ignored my concerns until I called them out for messaging other people about the incident and I simultaneously issued an ultimatum whereby I would go public with information regarding this incident at 10am on Wednesday, 22nd May.
• The investigators confirmed to me on the night of Tuesday, 21st May 2024, that they would be releasing a statement “before the day is over.” I dropped my previously mentioned ultimatum on the basis that they had been acting in good faith since their unclear initial statement. They failed on this promise, and also the following night, Wednesday, 22nd May 2024, when I was told it could be the last night of questions. In hindsight, I should have released this document when I initially threatened to prevent unhealthy, ambiguous speculation about Aspen’s removal.

• At the same time as this first announcement was released, I was removed from the Puzzle Kingdom Figma team and had a message welcoming PKGB’s new interim leader to the team deleted without explanation. I was later apologised to for this as the person who did so was acting on incomplete information (I was emotionally pressured by a person who had previously provided testimony to the case to allow them to open up to Aspen’s girlfriend, Azura, about what had happened to me, which was not sanctioned by the investigating team).
• In the final recommendation, the investigating team states that conflicts of interest between Puzzle Kingdom members on the PGCoC, myself, and Aspen would make it hard for the PGCoC to rule fairly in any direction. It should have occurred to me sooner that an investigation team comprised entirely of Puzzle Kingdom members would surely be even less able to come to a valid decision based on their conflicts of interest.

Finally, Persons B and C both engaged in a sexual (but not romantic) relationship with Aspen over the course of several months, starting in early March, and this persisted after I came forward to them about Aspen sexually assaulting me. I believe their actions since then are their ways of trying to justify their continued relations with Aspen.

At the time, I was emotionally unable to complete my university exams, and am grateful to have been unaffected by my decision to defer them to September last year. I’m incredibly thankful for the support network around me over the course of the last 8 months.

I have already lost so much trying to keep the PGC safe. I recommend keeping Aspen banned from your communities indefinitely, and thank those who spoke up against the investigators for endangering all victims of sexual predators in the Puzzle Gaming Community.

Please do not harass me, Aspen or anyone else you suspect is involved with this incident.

Amy “Lia” Hurrell