Dimension 20 Season 7

The Unsleeping City: Chapter II

Starring: Brennan Lee Mulligan as Dungeon Master;

Lou Wilson as Kingston Brown; Ally Beardsley as Pete Conlan;
Zac Oyama as Ricky Matsui; Siobhan Thompson as “Anastasia” Iga Lisowski;
Emily Axford as Sofia Lee; and Brian “Murph” Murphy as Cody “Night Angel” Walsh

Episode 11: Let's Get Tiny

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(The Unsleeping City theme music is here, get ready)

Brennan: Hello one and all and welcome to another exciting episode of "The Unsleeping City". I'm your humble dungeon master, Brennan Lee Mulligan. With me as always are our intrepid heroes. Say hi, intrepid heroes.

All: Hi, intrepid heroes.

Brennan: Last we left off, the champions of New York City found themselves in the sixth borough of Nod, deep in the Dreaming, having defeated a number of animated suits of armor and saving the unicorn, one of the three spirits of New York, as observed by the dumpster druid Kugrash three years ago. Our intrepid heroes went their way to various places throughout the sixth borough, including JFK, where Kingston and JJ had a meeting with Alejandro Ortiz, the celestial wizard and former head of the Gramercy Occult Society, with a very meaningful conversation between Kingston and Alejandro there. Sofie and Pete connected in the bathroom over a pregnancy test and an illusory box of Sour Patch Kids, and Pete dumping thousands of dollars worth of cocaine down a toilet with eyeballs who was talking to him.

Our intrepid heroes made their way deeper into the Metropolitan Museum of Memories, where Ricky saw a connection to Perry the Pigeon, Iga saw a connection to this fantastical Lisowski heirloom chest, while Sofia and Pete connected over the shared memories of Mr. and Mrs. Simos, Tony and his late wife Heather, the immediate predecessor of Pete Conlan, the former Vox Phantasma, back during the 1980s.

So, having found that information, you guys wended your way to Nod's bedside, where Nod talked to you about other monarchs of Dreaming, including Nuria in the Bay of Slumber, and an older entity, one of the older ones, a deep monarch of Dreaming that Pete discovered, or perhaps created, a name for at the end of last session, called Null. This entity broke through into Dreaming, grabbed Nod, removed them, and began to tear the city asunder before Stephen Sondheim reconstituted himself and opened a portal for all of you to jump back into the waking world, where you find yourselves currently.

In addition, Cody is butt naked because of doing a true reading from Iga's actual magical ancestral tarot deck, and also had a little time getting in touch with some of the history of medieval arms and armor back at the Met, which was lovely as well. Additionally, Kingston healed Nod prior to their capture by Null, and after the horrifying confrontation with Null, you're all screaming back into the waking world. Again, after having discovered the similarity between the magic of Iga's chest and Kingston and Iga determining that they would travel into the castle at the center of the chest together, and also discovering the relationship of Nod and Nuria to Tony Simos and to the Gladiator headquarters in Silicon Valley. Additionally, we discovered that Ricky had a connection to the three spirits of, the sort of protector spirits of New York City, through his devotion to Kugrash's memory and the fact that he had left his former life as a firefighter to help the homeless, which gave him a connection to Kugrash's original role in the city.

Our champions are flying through time and space, [whooshing] JJ's with you, you see around you in the sort of wormhole little flashes of these New York minutes around. (mimics explosions)

Ally: Can I touch one?

Brennan: Yeah, go for it. Give me a, oh, for the True Seeing as well, and touching one of these New York minutes, give me two wild magic surges. This first one is one through four.

Ally: It's a 9.

Brennan: Now it's 1 through 5, roll again.

Ally: It's a 12.

Brennan: Pete is now on a one through six on wild magic surges.

Ally: Okay.

Brennan: Building up a head of steam, Mr. Conlan. You grab, go ahead and give me Arcana check.

Ally: Ooh, that is a 17.

Brennan: You sense— these things are super fucking cool. You don't get a bad vibe off of this natural substance as you touch it. What you get is the idea, it feels like eagerness, excitement, enthusiasm, hustle, go, go, go, go, go. You think of all the parts of "Rhapsody in Blue" that go like. (sings exciting part of "Rhapsody in Blue") It's the hustle of the city made manifest in a unit of impossibly fast time. This is the part of New York City that becomes intoxicating to some, and to others means, I got to get the hell out of here, this is a pace of living that I truly cannot stand! But for Pete, it's very exciting. This is like a part of the, you realize that this is a huge magical component to the city, is the city's relationship to time. You get a sense that this raw element is incredibly positive. However, it is connected to time itself, and you sense that if these things are moved by raw Umbra, as they appear to be, 'cause there's sort of a naturally occurring Nod-based element in New York, that someone might be able to use it to flatten out time.

Ally: Hmm.

Brennan: And maybe.

Emily: Removes history.

Siobhan: Hmm.

Brennan: You feel a connection. Null attacked...you basically got away with your first confrontation with Null by rolling that nat 20. This second time, you did not die when they attacked because you made that Charisma-saving throw check. However, finding a name for Null provoked it. What I'm going to ask Pete now is, as you are fleeing from Nod, this entity is closer to you now. Does Pete want to, now that you are fleeing back to the waking world, Pete feels an opportunity to extend a part of himself to further define this thing that draws its power from being unnoticed and indefinable.

Ally: Mm-hm. Yeah.

Brennan: Awesome.

Ally: I think I hate that we're running away from Nod, who's in trouble, so I think any info that I can get, or any poking that I can do, I would do.

Brennan: Okay, I'm gonna say that as you can poke and get more information, anything you want to ask about Null as you are retreating from the Sixth Borough, I am going to, Pete is going to have to make that portion of himself vulnerable. So if Pete wants to know about this thing's past, he has to make his past vulnerable. If he wants to know about this thing's, like, identity and like what it truly is, he will have to make that part of himself vulnerable. What does Pete reach out to do, or to understand, about this thing?

Ally: What does it want?

Brennan: You reach out with your wants and you see the image of that silhouette (air whooshing) against the indigo skies of Nod. You watch that silhouette convulse in agony and misery, and as it stands, it doesn't look that dissimilar, but you could swear the silhouette in the suit looked a little bit more like it had your proportions. Almost every cosmology, or the vast majority of the understandings of the world, is that the world began in darkness, and most creation myths have some version of emptiness or void being at the beginning of things. There was a time when Null was everything, and what it wants is a return to that state.

Ally: Got it.

Brennan: The existence of its siblings and beyond lessen it in terms of its proportional share of the cosmos.

Ally: Wow. Okay.

Brennan: You all appear back in the waking world. You are on a busy street downtown, you're like way downtown near Houston, not too far away from like City Hall, where the area would've been. You see Stephen Sondheim twirls the two broadswords, vanishes them, goes,

Sondheim:  [sighs] That was close. A little bit too close. Glad to see you again, friends, and some new faces here as well. I'm Stephen Sondheim.You may be familiar with my works on Broadway.

Iga: Yes, you know what I love? Is "Passions." I love, it's my favorite. I feel like it's not everybody's favorite, I love it.

Sondheim: It's a deep cut.

Iga: She's in her tower, he comes to visit, it's so beautiful, the love story.

Sondheim: Yes, it's always about love. It's always about love, Iga Lisowski.

Brennan: And he disappears.

Iga: How he know my name?

Sofia: Oh, he's like really, really magical.

Iga: Oh, I know.

Cody: See if he had like an undershirt or something, 'cause.

(Siobhan giggles)

Pete: Oh dude, you're still naked, dude!

Brennan: Cody, you see a couple of construction workers whistle.

Construction Worker: Hey, woo!

Sofia: All right, have some respect, have some respect.

Zac: Are there any of those, like—

Emily: You know what, I'm going to march over to those, I'm going to march over to those construction workers.

Sofia: Excuse me, I'm assuming this is not your normal clothing? You probably change into work attire?

Construction Worker: Yeah, that's right, yeah, absolutely.

Sofia: Yeah, I'm gonna need one of your pairs of clothing, in exchange for that rude way that you just treated my companion.

Brennan: You see the guy goes,

Construction Worker: Okay.

Brennan: And takes his pants and shirt off. He's like,

Construction Worker: Does he need the underwear too, or?

Sofia: No, he doesn't. He might need to chafe a little to learn.

Brennan: Cody, you get like a dirty white T-shirt and some kind of like acid washed jeans.

Cody: [quietly] Oh my god.

Brennan: The guy looks and says,

Construction Worker: Hey lady, can I keep my shoes? I'm not off the clock yet.

Sofia: Yeah, you can keep your shoes. Again, I don't mind if he steps on a couple nails.

Brennan: There's just a dude with like a hard hat, thick boots, and

tighty-whities who's like,

Construction Worker: All right, back to work, gang!

Brennan: Incredible.

Kingston: Hey, Pete, what was that?

Ally: Oh yeah, I think I tell everyone everything, and how I found the name and what it wants and that Nod is in trouble.

Sofia: But we can't, but you didn't feel us, so we could fight it there.

Pete: I don't know, it kind of came out of nowhere and took Nod by the neck, and then everything was getting ripped apart. I don't know, Stephen Sondheim really made the choice to bring us back here and I trust him implicitly, so. I followed Stephen through the tear.

Sofia: Yeah, well, I mean, I think that we've spoken that there's work to be done in the waking world.

Kingston: Yeah.

Pete: Yeah, I mean, I, yeah.

Brennan: Pete, you feel that your connection to the dream realm has not weakened or severed in any way. You still feel the magical potential and power here, and in fact are holding onto like a lot of wild magic. And you realize almost that like Nod, wherever they are, is sending power to you. You feel almost like your presence here in the waking world right now is a life raft for a lot of the remaining power of the dream realm. Like you know that Nod invested a fraction of themselves in you, so I don't think, as much as I think Pete didn't want to run away from a fight, the fact that you are here right now means that you still have, that some big important portion of the Sixth Borough got away.

Ally: Yeah.

Brennan: But I think to that point that Kingston just affirmed, and Sofia, there's a lot of work to be done in the waking world.

Ally: Mm-hm.

Ricky: Well, I feel like I need to try to track down the rest of Kugrash's spirits. I don't know, what do people feel like they need to do right now? It feels like, yeah, like there's a lot of work to be done on this side.

Kingston: It feels like stuff, like what you need to do, I think will contribute to like whatever greater thing we're going to face, so it feels like maybe helping you track down these two spirits and then, once Iga gets a good night's rest, us going into the box, feel like the next two bigger things that'll happen before we confront, I don't know, whatever this Null thing is.

Iga: Yeah, I got to go to Brooklyn anyway, that's where I live, so. Hey, if you guys want to come over for-

Ricky: Hey, me too!

Iga: It's the best borough. No offense to any of the other boroughs.

Kingston: Wrong, but okay.

Ricky: I live like in a clocktower. We've been there.

Iga: I live in a full house. I am very rich.

(soft laughter)

Sofia: Wow. That's pretty cool. I had a house once.

Iga: A regular family house in Brooklyn means I am very rich.

Ricky: Well cool, I guess I'm gonna try to like track down that pigeon coop village.

Pete: Co-op?

Ricky: Co-op, yeah.

Iga: Polyamorous animal house?

Pete: Yeah.

Sofia: I think if we have the rest, I would love to help you if you want company going into the box, I would love to help. But it sounds like you need a night's rest and stuff, so if that's the case, I have an appointment that I should go to.

Iga: Okay.

Kingston: Okay.

Brennan: Awesome.

Cody: And Pete, I don't know if your bookstore is hiring or anything, but I don't have, stuff.

Pete: Yeah.

Cody: So...

Pete: We both need to make a lot of money very quickly.

Sofia: I was actually gonna offer, Pete, that I might reach out to some, I've had some clients in the past, best-paying job is usually when like a real like dark-haired brunette wants to go blonde, and sometimes you talk them out of it, right? Because it just wouldn't look good. But I was thinking that maybe I would hit some of them up and go through with it to try and make some cash for you.

Ricky: [realizing] Oh my god.

Pete: Oh my god.

Ricky: I just realized a way to make some money pretty quick.

Pete: What's that?

Ricky: It's not New Year's Day yet, right?

Brennan: No.

Pete: Yeah, I can't sell drugs though, man.

Ricky: No, I know. But I think we might be poised for a calendar.

(Emily laughs)

        Kingston: This is true.

Pete: Dude, would you really? Wait, Sofia, what if you told these women that they could go blonde and then be in the Mr. March calendar?

Sofia: I think they would pay extra.

Brennan: Okay, the craziest 80’s saxophone comes on, the montage starts.

(all laughing as some sax tunes play)

Zac: Go back to my Brooklyn loft and, y’know.

Brennan: Yeah.

Ally: I think Pete is just weeping (laughs).

Ricky: Esther, we're back! Real quick?

Pete: [strained] Just such a good dude.

Brennan: Amazing, so all of these are incredible leads to follow. You guys let me know if there's something you guys want to get done that day or like in the case of the chest, the next day, we're gonna cover that next. Otherwise, these sound like a lot of downtime activities, which we've been hurting for for a while anyway.

Emily: Okay, so—

Brennan: And a lot of people sound like they want to do stuff over a period of time.

Emily: Yeah, so is that something with the dyeing a bunch of, turning a bunch of brunette women blonde, is that something that I can do? Like, I don't have to do that today, right?

Brennan: No, you don't have to do that today.

Emily: Okay. And I think I'm gonna ask Pete-

Murph: I have downtime stuff, but no-

Emily: I'm gonna ask Pete,

Sofia: Pete, can I get Dr. Lugash's number?

Pete: Yeah, what's up?

Sofia: You are literally the only one who knows what's up.

Pete: [realizing] Oh!

Sofia: I need a magical doctor.

Pete: Yes, yes, definitely. I actually need to see Dr. Lugash really bad, 'cause just pretty much everything I've done would constitute a rebound and that's why I have a sponsor.

Sofia: Yeah, I was gonna say maybe if Lugash, because I'll be straight with you, I had a actual trigger during all the Heaven stuff.

Pete: Ooh.

Sofia: And I wouldn't mind, you know, getting checked out physically, and then maybe having a mental conversation with him.

Pete: Yeah, totally.

Sofia: To set me back straight.

Pete: Yeah, he is also a licensed therapist. It's really crazy, I don't know how he had time to get all this training, but yeah, he's amazing. He does a lot of EFT tapping.

Sofia: What's that? What's that?

Pete: Oh, it's just you-

Brennan: When Sofia says that she had a trigger, did you roll a nat 1 on one of those dice?

Emily: I rolled a 1 on my 10. I just didn't say anything 'cause it just felt, I didn't want to interrupt.

Brennan: So now both Sofia and Pete are at d8s.

Ally: Yay!

Siobhan: Dang.

Emily: Yeah, but I want to use this time to get, you know. And I will use my downtime to boost it.

Brennan: Boost it. Cool.

Zac: I think Ricky would go to try to find the pigeon today.

Brennan: Cool, Ricky's gonna go find the pigeon today. Sofia and Pete are gonna go find Dr. Lugash. Kingston, Cody, Iga, are you guys going with Ricky to the pigeon, or?

Lou: I'd go with Ricky, if Ricky would have company.

Siobhan: Yeah, if Ricky wants—

Zac: Yeah, sure.

Murph: I think Cody's probably gonna go back to the house and just lay on the floor and think about life for a minute.

Ally: Oh, I'll give Cody my keys, since he probably doesn't have any right now, and be like,

Pete: Help yourself to anything, dude. Any of my clothes are yours, yeah.

Iga: Cody, my son has sort of outgrown his bed and we were thinking about getting him a full size, so if you maybe want to take his twin bed.

Cody: Thanks.

Iga: It's maybe a little short, but it's a bed.

Cody: Yeah, I mean, yeah, that'd be-

Iga: You'd have to get somebody down to Greenpoint to carry it up to Queens.

Cody: I'm cool for now, I'm good. I just probably need some clothes, so much appreciated, Pete.

Pete: For sure, man, yeah.

Cody: Cool.

Brennan: Cody, you roll back to your spot barefoot. You walk in the door in jeans and a dirty white T-shirt, lugging—

Murph: What is it called now?

Brennan: Thirsting Blade, it's Thirsting Blade Dark Excalibur Mega Genesis.

Murph: Dark Excalibur Mega Genesis, it's a big fork of swords.

Zac is running his hands over his face and through his hair in typical Cody-induced consternation.

Brennan: It's a giant fork. You walk in, the house is like partially, like, ruined. The door is like blasted off its hinges, and you see that there's Umbral Arcana around. You see that Nasir comes down and goes,

Nasir: Cody, we need to have a serious house meeting, man. Those movers you hired,

Brennan: And you see Nasir's eyes sort of flicker because Nasir's not in

the Unsleeping City. So he's like,

Nasir: Those movers you hired rushed in here without knocking on the door, grabbed all your stuff and literally smashed a bunch of the walls and stuff and dragged it outside, and I'm sorry, but that is your deposit. That is gonna come out of your deposit.

Cody: Yeah, no, that makes sense, that's fair.

(Emily laughs)

Brennan: Nasir looks shocked that he's not getting pushback. He goes,

Nasir: Cool, okay, cool. Glad you understand. Lars and Brita left out some, like, banana muffins, if you want one, they're in the kitchen.

Cody: That'd be awesome, thank you.

Nasir: All right, chill, man, okay, good.

Cody: [stilted] Cool, bye.

Brennan: [laughing] Nasir walks away. Your half of the room, a lot of Josh's stuff is destroyed, in whatever Iga's tarot did, you're guessing your bed and all your shit just slammed through the sheet and smashed out the door into the street and flew into the sky.

Murph: I think I just take the sheet down that, luckily, it was probably technically Josh's sheets that we used to separate the room, and I just wrap myself in it like a sleeping bag.

(all laughing)

Ally: Cody, no!

Murph: I try to hang my, like, all I want to do is hang this awesome sword, but all of my like mounting stuff is gone, and so I just put it up against the wall, and then I just wrap myself in a cocoon. [holds his arms crossed against his chest]

(loud laughter)

Ally: My bro!

Brennan: So, so funny.

Ally: Fuck.

Emily: In the clothing that, in the clothing that I—

[gentle, cheerful acoustic guitar music]

Brennan: Ricky, Iga and Kingston, you all arrive at a rooftop with, like, a little village of like rooftop gardens and hutches, there's like pigeons and rabbits up here, there's a little thing of chickens, this is like a sort of lovely community co-op garden up on the roof. Kingston, you get like a very positive vibe from this place. This is like a community garden, people coming up here, you know, subsisting for themselves. You see that these things get shared with a lot of people, the eggs from the chickens get shared, and Ricky, you sort of follow over to the edge of this hutch, that again, the Umbral Arcana would make people just see the animals here, but you can see that the animals here have actually constructed, these are all like speaking beasts, for lack of a better word, and they have all created a lovely little village for themselves. A little moss-covered balcony has a small sort of like breakfast nook, and you see, you guys have also by the way been up all night, so you guys are like bleary-eyed, it's been a long adventure, but you see Perry the Pigeon sitting at his little tiny pigeon-sized table, and pouring a cup of tea is a little sort of splotched brown and white rabbit who pours the tea, hands it to him, gives him a little kiss.

Iga: [holding back her familiar] Misiek, no! Misiek, no no, Misiek!

Misiek squeals.

Iga: Misiek, no no, Misiek. They're friends.

Brennan: You see the rabbit looks over, takes out a tiny little air horn, and goes. (air horn blows) And Misiek goes into your bag.

Iga: I'm sorry, he's a sweet boy.

Ricky: We're so sorry about that. Kingston, do you have any Cinnabon left?

Kingston: Yeah, I got some bites left (laughs). Sir, Perry, I'm not sure you remember us.

Brennan: Perry looks up and goes,

Perry: [high, Mickey Mouse-ey] Oh! Oh my god! It's Ricky Matsui and Kingston Brown! Wow, okay, well, to what do we owe the pleasure? [laughs nervously]

Brennan: And you see that the rabbit leans over and says,

Rabbit: [distinguished-sounding, slightly nasal] Honey, do you know these people?

Brennan: And you see Perry says,

Perry: No, well, I knew them, back when I was living in Central Park. Everyone, this is my husband Warren. Warren, this is Kingston Brown, actually the Vox Populi of New York City. This is Ricky Matsui, [behind his hand] a great chest to eat crumbs off of.

Zac: I take some Cinnabon and put it on my chest.

Perry: Oh, do you mind?

Ricky: For whoever wants it.

Brennan: Bunch of pigeons come and be like,

Pigeons: Thank you, very kind, appreciate it.

Ricky holds his arms out and seems very happy.

Iga: This is one of the calendar pictures right here. That's it, we got it.

Brennan: A bunch of pigeons eye Kingston from the time that he shooed them all out of his apartment.

Lou: Oh, Kingston's having flashbacks to that time. He like takes a full step back from Ricky, and is just like,

Kingston: Mm, I don't do, I don't do large crowds of pigeons anymore, I'm sorry.

Ricky: You don't have to, but it's pretty awesome. Feels kind of interesting.

Kingston: Yeah, yeah, I'm sure, I'm sure.

Brennan: You see that Warren looks up and says,

Warren: Well, I didn't know that we were going to be having company over. It's a pleasure to meet all of you. How do you all know Perry, my darling husband?

Zac: We met Perry a couple years ago at, can I make an Insight check?

Brennan: Yeah, go for it.

Zac: Okay, not too great, 11.

Ricky: We met Perry at a wedding? Going into a wedding?

Brennan: You see that Perry looks over and says,

Perry: Hon, this was the big Confetti wedding. Do you remember when Ronald, my cousin, married Angela Confetti, that pixie, whose dad was in the mob?

Brennan: And he says,

Warren: Oh, heavens, yes. Oh, that was quite a to-do, yes, yes yes, I do remember that.

Brennan: You see that Perry says,

Perry: Yeah, in any case, what brings you out to a rooftop in Brooklyn?

Ricky: I don't know that you have always felt this way, or if this is new for you, but I have taken on sort of Kugrash's mantle so to speak, and I'm searching for the spicy pigeon. Do you know what that means?

Brennan: There is a moment of intense silence. I'm gonna need Ricky to roll a Persuasion check for me, if you would be so kind.

Murph laughs, hands on his head.

Siobhan: Can I give him the help action?

Brennan: Yes, you can give him the help action.

Siobhan: Maybe it's better coming from Kingston.

Lou: No, doubly.

Zac: Natural 20.

(all cheering)

[somber, chiming music]

Brennan: You see that Perry looks at you, his eyes go wide, and he goes,

Perry: The spicy pigeon, that's… um... Yeah, I've been having some interesting, dreams for a little while.

Brennan: You see he looks down, he flies back down to the balcony, and Warren is there, and you see Perry says,

Perry: Hun, I, uh. Would it be all right if we, if I talked privately?

Brennan: And you see Warren goes like,

Warren: I completely understand, are you all right? Do you want me to call Marty and try to get him on the phone?

Brennan: And you see Perry says,

Perry: No, no, I can reach out to Marty later. But if you would like to.

Brennan: And you see that Warren says,

Warren: My darling, I completely understand, I love you with all my heart, I know that you had very strong feelings for this man a long time ago, and it was a very painful loss.

Brennan: You see he gives him a little kiss on the cheek, Warren goes inside. Perry [fluttering noises] flies up and perches on top of his own little hutch, his house, and he goes,

Perry: Yeah, I got into a really bad way after Kugrash sort of at the bagel and disappeared. It was just such a beautiful sacrifice, and I know that Kugrash didn't necessarily return the feelings, I'm not like, you know, I'm like a thinking, feeling person. As an adult, it's your responsibility to manage rejection and find a way to move on, that's part of life. But to know that he was such a beautiful soul and that the chance for anything just… and also those feelings are also always about how you relate to yourself in a lot of ways, and I just wasn't in a healthy place. But I got a lot of help from Marty, and I got better, and you know, in recovery right now, and it works if you work it and you're worth it, so.

Ricky: Seems like you're doing really well here.

Perry: Yeah!

Kingston: Hell yeah, Perry.

Perry: Thank you, Warren has, well, I got to be careful because I, no one's ever saved, it's always a process, but I'm happy. Warren makes me really happy, and it's a beautiful life here on the roof.

Ricky: That's awesome. Well, I can't pretend to know everything about this, but something has drawn me here to you, Perry, and I think you have been chosen in this specific way. Does that resonate with you at all?

Brennan: Perry looks down at the side of his hutch, and you see tiny little bags, sort of look like little fairy bags, tied up with like burlap and old scraps of garbage and string, that clearly Perry has tied, and they're little bags of crumbs. You see he goes,

Perry: There's a lot of neighborhoods in the city where pigeons have been living for a long time that are, you know, when people like move out of a place, or there's not as many people around as there used to be, most of what we eat is the stuff that people throw away, and if there's no people to throw anything away, then there's no food for the pigeons there. So, I don't know.

Ricky: So you're feeding the pigeons with these little lunches?

Perry: I'm not a hero, it's what anyone would do.

Ricky: [nodding] Yeah, wow, that's awesome.

Iga: What a sweet pigeon.

Perry: [laughs a little] Oh, you're awful nice.

Iga: You're like the Ricky Matsui of pigeons.

Perry: Whoa, hey, I'm not that ripped, first of all (laughs).

Iga: I don't know, I mean, I've seen a lot of pigeons, you seem pretty ripped for a pigeon.

Perry: Oh, shucks!

Ricky: You look like you're in really good shape, honestly.

Perry: Thank you!

Kingston: Pigeon-wise yeah, top notch.

Ally: “Pigeon-wise!”

Perry: I mean I've been feeling great. Like after I got sober, I've been feeling really strong and really healthy and, I don't know, I do feel kind of powerful in a way, I guess, but.

Zac: Hm, can I use Divine Sense or something, just to see if there's—

Brennan: Perry is radiating celestial light.

Zac: Huh.

Brennan: You see he has like a suite of paladin abilities. Like he looks almost like class levels in paladin, that he has some sort of powers, but you sense that this spirit has descended in him, but it's maybe a situation where he hasn't tried to use any of them, so he wouldn't know.

Zac: Okay, I hold up my ax and I say,

Ricky: Perry Pidgeon, claim your power as the spicy pigeon. It is time.

Zac: And I just hold my ax aloft.

Perry: Uh, I'm sorry, claim my power— [suddenly yelling] as the spicy pigeon! [mimics exploding light] Ah! Ah!

Brennan: You see Warren runs out, he goes,

Warren: Oh my heavens, my darling!

Brennan: He puts a fire extinguisher on him.

(Perry screams)

Ricky: Hey, Warren, good looking out.

(Emily laughs)

Brennan: And you see the original aura of the spicy pigeon feels just like in did back in the day when Kugrash would summon it. Perry descends onto the balcony and goes,

Perry: Oh my god, oh my god, I have like superpowers. Wow!

Iga: You're a paladi-geon.

Ricky: Paladi-geon.

Perry: [laughs] I'm gonna be very honest, this lady has made an incredible first impression on me. I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but there's just something about very like world-wise woman of maturity that just sets all pigeons at ease.

Iga: Oh, there is so much to learn from pigeons. I love to go to the park. I sit in McCarren Park, I take out my bread, I sit among the birds. It's one of my favorite things to do in the city.

Perry: I didn't want to guess, but I was like, this woman feeds birds and you can tell.

Iga: No, I absolutely feed birds.

Perry: And I was all about it, I'm really all about it. Well shucks, listen, I've been sort of out of the loop for a little while, but you know, [salutes] reporting for duty! Is there a juicy cockroach and a unicorn out there too?

Ricky: There's a unicorn, but I was gonna ask you if you know any cockroaches of note.

Zac: I'm assuming he understands that that's like the trifecta now.

Brennan: Yeah.

Ricky: We're dealing with some forces that are beyond what is normally happening here, and we need that trifecta to be unified.

Perry: Okay, well you know, again, reporting for duty. And what I would say is, well god, I know who you have to go talk to. My sponsor, Marty.

Kingston: Marty, yeah.

Perry: Yeah.

Kingston: I thought I recognized the name, yeah, this is one of Kugrash's old friends.

Perry: Yes, exactly!

Kingston: Yeah.

Perry: He's been doing great, he started a monastery.

Emily, who is not in the scene, immediately stares with huge eyes at Brennan.

Perry: It's The Monastery of the Sacred Rat, it's up in the Bronx.

Iga: What?

(Emily laughs and claps)

Perry: Yeah!

Iga: Are they looking for a First Fist? Because I know somebody who is available.

Perry: Honestly, are you serious? Oh my god.

Iga: I'm absolutely serious.

Perry: Listen, well yeah, it's the Monastery of the Sacred Rat. Fred and Marty started it a couple years ago. They are a diligent monastery that protect the insect folk of New York from aggressors in kind of the tiny world of New York, from all sorts of threats. They're incredibly powerful monks because they've learned to meditate and tap into the power of Kugrash. They draw their power from him.

Kingston: Sounds pretty juicy.

Perry: Juicy is right! [laughs] Wow! Okay, but I think you'll have a hard time getting there, because of your size, frankly. The monastery's in an old hot dog cart that fell through a sewer grate like 10 years ago.

Emily: This is becoming like a Jim Henson movie and I love it.

Ally: This is so cute!

Zac: I understand implicitly. I understand all of this and maybe we should head there. It's pretty late now, right?

Brennan: It's morning, but you guys have been up all night. You guys absolutely need a long rest.

Ricky: Maybe we check it out first thing tomorrow.

Perry: Absolutely, but again, I don't think you'll be able to get there at your current size.

Ricky: Hmm. You don't happen to have a way to, wait, how did we get tiny last time?

Kingston: The gnomes, the gnomes in the train station. That's who made us—

Iga: There are gnomes in the train station?

Kingston: I didn't love that, but.

Iga: I should have been more involved, I am kicking myself.

Kingston: No, no, no, hey.

Iga: There's goddamn tiny gnomes in the train station?

Kingston: There's a lot. Yeah, they had a big dragon, it's intense, but I guess that's how we got small last time, if we have to do it again.

Ricky: Yeah, I think I have to, at least. I mean, maybe not everyone has to, but.

Kingston: Okay, cool.

Ricky: I think that could be, that's the answer.

Brennan: Incredible. Perry gives you a big hug, Ricky. He says that he's gonna be reachable. His building shares an old iPhone that's built into the floor on the first floor of their coop, so he gives you the number to text to get the building's iPhone. He says,

Perry: All right, take care!

Brennan: You all head out to go get some various states of rest and stuff like that. Sofia and Pete. Pete, you arrive at the first place we ever saw Pete in this campaign, a doctor's office near the East River in Greenpoint, by an old warehouse. You walk in, Lugash looks at you and says,

Lugash: [Eastern European accent] Oh, Peter, so good to see you, my friend. How are you feeling, you doing okay?

Pete: No, that's kind of why I wanted to come by and talk to you. Do you have a minute, or are you?

Lugash: Sure, I have a moment.

Brennan: You see he looks at Sofia.

Lugash: Hello, I am Dr. Primjitzski, pleasure to meet you.

Sofia: Hi, I've heard wonderful things. I'll give you both a moment, I can talk to you later.

Lugash: Oh, very well, please.

Sofia: Do you have a waiting room, or?

Lugash: Yes, there is a waiting room outside, one of the couch have a hole in it from a knife fight that broke out in the waiting room, so just get it a little wet sometimes, I would sit on the chair probably.

Emily: Okay, I go sit on the wet couch.

Pete: It'll be really quick.

Ally: I shoot you a look that's like, “I am so sorry, this will be fast.”

Sofia: No, no, no, of course.

Pete: Yeah, so I ended up just kind of in a situation again, where, you know, I just… It's just so easy, old habits die hard I would say, and especially when it comes to money and stuff like that, there's just seemingly a pull on me for life, when it comes to drugs. But yeah, so I got a bunch to sell, and then I flushed it all down the toilet, and now I'm in the hole $2,500.

Brennan: Lugash looks and says,

Lugash: Okay, well this is a suboptimal situation. What I would say to you, Peter, is number one, for your health, is we often go back to our habits, when we entering moments of stress. Breaking routine… These things we rely on for familiarity, and especially in moments of stress, we fall back on old habits because these habits, even when they are unhealthy, the part of our brain that is answering to short-term stress, panic, it knows that even if it is bad, it will work for the moment, and when things work for the moment, and you are panicked and stressed, you cannot think about what will work actual long-term for your health. To the best of your ability, I would say to remove these stress factors from your life, but I understand that that is not always a thing one can accomplish.

Pete: Yeah.

Lugash: What I would ask is, please, tomorrow, the next day, come to meeting with me, I think will be a good idea.

Pete: I think so too, yeah.

Lugash: For the money situation, I cannot answer this for you. I do not know how-

Pete: Yeah yeah yeah. Actually my friends are pitching in to help out, which honestly just kind of feels worse. You know, just kind of when you're already in a shame spiral and then people are good to you, it almost stings a little bit worse, so. But I took some deep breaths and was ultimately like thankful for my friends and, you know. Hoo, yeah, great. One day at a time (laughs).

Lugash: One day at a time is right, Peter. Your friends are taking care of you because they love you and also because they know you would take care of them too. It is never a burden to switch back and forth who is carrying who.

Pete: Mm-hm. [nods] The word "burden".

Brennan: Yeah, you see he looks and just says, like,

Lugash: You cannot let it sting you that your friends want to help you.

Pete: Yeah, man.

Lugash: There is a big part of your heart that always is telling the story to yourself that you are the only one who's ever going to be on your side. I see it. You are very quick to be independent, you are very quick to say, I can solve this, I don't check in with anybody, I'm going to go out and take care of this myself. And Peter, the heartbreak is, for a long time, you had to be that. You are not wrong to have those instincts.

Pete: Yeah, that's incredibly true.

Lugash: It's just not true anymore, and it will take time to retrain those habits, and you must be kind to yourself while you retrain them. It is a blessing for your friends to have you in their life, because you are someone worth taking care of. Everyone is worth taking care of. You are going to be okay, and you should know that what to you feels like it stings because your friends, they want to help you, think of this, Peter. How do you feel when you get to do something heroic for your friends that help them? Does it feel bad?

Pete: No. It feels good.

Lugash: [pointing] Let your friends feel good too. Selfish not to let your friends help you.

Pete: Yeah, true. I saw, uh, I follow a therapist on Instagram.

Lugash: I'm gonna tell you right now, don't do that.

[cast laughs]

Pete: She just posted something really profound.

Lugash: We already know that I feel like Instagram has become what used to be Adderall for you. I have said this already.

Pete: Yeah, it's true.

Lugash: Yes, okay, good. I'm glad we make sure. Let me go see the young woman in the waiting room.

Pete: Yeah.

Brennan: He gives you a big hug, a kiss on the head.

Lugash: You're going to be all right, Peter. You're a good boy.

Pete: Thank you.

Brennan: And he says,

Lugash: Yes, Ms. Lee, please to come in.

Sofia: Oh hi, yes, yeah, this couch was very wet.

Lugash: Ugh, I said the chai— okay.

Sofia: You honestly undersold it, it's sopping.

Brennan: You see he says,

Lugash: So Ms. Lee, pleasure to come, I am doctor for cash, my name is Lugash Primjitzski. What can I do for you?

Sofia: Um… I think I'm with, ah, child.

Lugash: Oh, okay, well this is-

Sofia: Sorry, I don't know, sometimes when you talk to a doctor, you say things that you wouldn't say to your friend.

Lugash: No, I understand.

Sofia: I just kind of panicked.

Lugash: So someone in your situation wants to see a doctor.

Sofia: Yeah.

Lugash: And I don't want to make any presumption, but-

Sofia: I think it's, I have a gynecologist, I love her, but I think that she's not part of The Unsleeping City, and I think this baby isn't part of the waking world, entirely.

Lugash: Okay, so we check it out. I also don't want to broach this subject, you have said you are with child, and you refer to a baby even though you are not showing. So just because I am a doctor, to make clear what you want me to do, it is your intention to take this pregnancy to term and deliver a child, correct?

Sofia: Yeah.

Lugash: Congratulations, from me to you. Beautiful.

Sofia: Thank you, I think it's a really complicated situation, and I'll get to the place of congratulations, but right now I have like a lot of other thoughts going on, and I'm just trying to take a bird's eye view.

(Ally chuckles)

Lugash: Very well, that is all right. How many weeks late are you right now?

Sofia: About two weeks.

Brennan: Okay, so, he says,

Lugash: So right now this will not be a fully-formed fetus, in all likelihood this will be an embryo, yes? So it's limited to what we will be able to do.

Sofia: Yeah, I guess honestly I should've just Googled at what point you're supposed to go to the doctor, I just-

Lugash: No, it's perfectly, for what I can do, it very easy. Again, I also want to say thank you for coming to me. Mostly I pull bullets out of gangsters.

(Emily laughs)

Lugash: But I want to, you know, it is nice to have an opportunity to prove I am a friend to the heroes of New York. Pete does me a great favor by allowing me to perform top surgery or, as he say, I [makes air quotes] "shot his tits off."

Ally: You just hear from the other room,

Pete: Ha!

(all laugh)

Sofia: Between you and me, Pete did me a really great favor today, and I owe him big time.

Lugash: He's a good, good man, Peter.

Sofia: Yeah.

Lugash: And by the way, I did not shoot his tits off. Surgery was-

Sofia: Really?

Lugash: I fired a gun one time because in the middle of surgery there was a B and E, and a guy broke into my doctor's office.

Emily and Ally laugh. Ally waves their finger.

Ally: Full sterile, bang!

(all laughing)

Siobhan: [Iga voice] The gun was put through the sterilization process.

Sofia: Yeah, I always pictured it so differently, the way that Pete described it.

Lugash: Peter, he have a way with words, he like to exaggerate. I did not shoot his tits.

Sofia: Okay.

Zac is onscreen with his face fully in his hands.

Lugash: I shoot man who come from a rival crime family, vendetta, plug him real quick. He looking for information, and then, and honestly, you know what I do right after we administer anesthetic and it needs a minute? I go pull the bullet out of the gangster that I shoot, and I say don't come into my place again, and I send him on his way.

Sofia: Wow, this sounds like this was a really busy day for you.

Lugash: Honestly, pretty normal day for my clinic. For my practice, pretty normal. But we gonna take a look at the embryo, your concern again is that there may be something of the supernatural occurring in this pregnancy.

Sofia: Yes, I just feel as though I must be proactive, because I do not know what's going on. I mean, for all I know, it's three years old in there.

Lugash: I'm gonna tell you right now, if you were to have effectively a toddler inside your body, and to be the shape you are right now, very unlikely, so just-

Sofia: I know, I know, I know, I know.

Lugash: No, of course.

Sofia: I also don't know if there's any precedent for this, or if it's dangerous to anyone involved anyways.

Lugash: Well, I'm going to go up into storage to get the stirrups. You can imagine I'm not performing a gynecological exam super regularly, but I do have the equipment. You are ready for everything in my line of work.

Brennan: And we're going to do the checkup. He gets a big box of stuff, and the main thing he gets is like ultrasound, stuff like that. And you see that he has some sort of magical stuff here. As he does, you see those dragons tattooed on his arm, on both arms, kind of move a little bit as he's scanning stuff, sort of swim around on his skin.

Sofia: What's with the tattoos?

Lugash: This?

Sofia: I like 'em. Yeah, but they move, I don't see that every day.

Lugash: Oh, before I was doctor, I was just full gangster, extremely dangerous magic gangster. I got these when I was living in Moscow, and [considers his forearm] I don't live there anymore, but I still have magic tattoo.

Sofia: Oh. I wouldn't mind a magic tattoo.

Lugash: Sounds cool to me, right?

Brennan: So he looks, he's gonna make a Medicine check. That is a 24. You see he scans, and he says, takes the stethoscope off,

[gentle, chiming music]

Lugash: Well, Ms. Lee, I am very happy to tell you that it looks like you have a perfectly normal pregnancy which is advancing. The embryo, from what we can tell, is partially suffused with celestial, divine, radiant energy. I'm going to try to say this, as a doctor I always try to advise caution in these moments. The embryo inside you is composed of such a powerful divine substance, even though it is going through mitosis in a perfectly normal way, the cells are splitting and growing, but the, how do I say this, the embryo inside you is completely invincible.

(Emily laughs)

Sofia: Okay, I was gonna kind of bring that up, because once I had the inclination, I was in a fight and there was a moment where it crossed my mind, do I keep fighting or do I, you know, take a disengage as we call it, and I went for the disengage because of that.

Lugash: Ah yes, I understand. You are a very danger-prone woman, yes.

Sofia: Yeah.

Lugash: I understand.

Sofia: In fact, I'm rewarded cosmically by getting into dangerous situations.

Lugash: 100%, to be very clear, if there were to be a nuclear bomb to go off in New York City, all that would be left would be the cockroaches and your baby.

(Emily laughs)

Sofia: Okay!

Lugash: I get a number of sort of sonogram tests, we look for a certain amount of radiation. This baby, 100% invincible.

Sofia: (laughing) Okay.

Lugash: Honestly kind of crazy. If anything, the baby is honestly, not a baby, it's an embryo, but the embryo honestly is making you safer by being in there, so.

Sofia: Okay.

Lugash: But you know, so that's what's going on at the moment. Probably as a doctor I recommend you stay out of danger just for you and your own safety, but, you know.

Sofia: Okay, all right, thank you very much, Doctor. This has been very informative. Is there anything I should be eating or drinking to support its brain development?

Lugash: Oh, absolutely, I give you a list of prenatal vitamins.

Brennan: You see Lugash goes and starts getting medical stuff together.

Sofia: And then at what point would I be certain this was gonna happen to the point where I might tell someone, or other people knowing that it was, you know.

Lugash: Definite yes. Well, for normal embryo it's a period of a couple months after you're aware, to be safe. Some people wait until around the time that they are showing to tell people. Again, this embryo is so potently magical, and again I don't use the word invincible lightly, truly I think if me and embryo got into a fight, embryo wins, is where I am sort of at right now. The way I feel is, I think it is probably safe to, when you feel most ready, you can say to who you like. But you know, I would maybe give yourself some time to think about what all this means, yes?

Sofia: Yeah, okay. I guess one last thing,

Emily: I take my feet off the stirrups, but I'm still in like the (laughs) little plastic thing they make you wear.

Sofia: I just, can I have a hug?

Lugash: Oh, Ms. Lee, of course!

Brennan: You see he gives you [mimics hug].

Sofia: Yeah, I just, it feels like other people do this with someone else, so I just wanted you to be that person.

Brennan: He smiles. You see he does the math of a partially-celestial pregnancy, and gives you a big, deep hug, and he says,

Lugash: I'm going to give you my card, call me anytime, we're going to take care of this pregnancy. Beautiful things in your future, okay?

Sofia: Thank you.

Lugash: Beautiful things.

Sofia: I do have a fortune teller, but thank you.

Brennan: He says,

Lugash: Madame Anastasia?

Sofia: Yeah, mm-hm.

Lugash: Oh, she's great.

Sofia: Very expensive, very worth it.

Lugash: Very expensive, very, very worth it. Moves a tremendous amount of money for a lot of the people that I work with, so she's-

Sofia: Whoa, okay. [laughs nervously]

Lugash: She's great, she's great.

Sofia: Wow.

Lugash: Yes, 100%.

Brennan: Lugash smiles, you and Pete take off.

Ally: I put my arm around her, and then while I was waiting, I ran downstairs to a bodega and bought you a leopard print sweater.

Emily, wiping a tear, starts laughing.

Siobhan: A bodega sweater?

Ally: That is covered in dust. Absolutely covered in dust.

Pete: Hey, there you go!

Brennan: Pete, as you go to the bodega and get a leopard print sweater, you see that a sparkling, shimmering thing surrounds the bodega, and the sweater gleams with magic, and La Gran Gata, on the cash register of the bodega, smiles at you and says,

La Gran Gata: Tell my champion that her child will walk always in the steps of La Gran Gata de la tienda de la esquina.

Ally: I give you the sweater and I tell you that.

Sofia: Thank you, Pete. I don't know what I would've done if you hadn't talked to me today.

Pete: Same. Absolutely same, yeah.

Pete and Sofia hug.

Brennan: So much love! So much love here in the space. Incredible, so, everyone heads back to their spots to get some rest for the next day. Pete, you go back to Astoria. Does Sofie go back to her spot with her mom?

Emily: Uh, yeah. Yeah, she might go back.

Pete: You can stay with me and Cody, if you want!

Sofia: Mm, maybe I will. I think I'm going to.

Murph’s jaw drops and he puts his hands up to his head. Ally is losing it a little.

Ally: When we get to the door, I go,

Pete: Give me five minutes.

Brennan: And then I'm like,

Pete: Cody, we got to clean, now!

Cody: Oh fuck, all right!

Murph: Just look at my absolutely blank room.

Cody: All right, my room's done.

(Ally laughs)

Brennan: Peter, you come back down-

Pete: Anyway, so, okay, sorry, I just freaked out, 'cause like a real actual adult person was coming in, and I just felt, you know. There were a lot of crumbs! There were a lot of crumbs.

Sofia: Peter, I live in a studio apartment with my mother in Staten Island, my standards are low.

Pete: Right, great. So you, me and Cody are all gonna split my bed.

(all laughing)

Ally: We just link arms.

Siobhan: Top and tail.

Murph: I'm just at the bottom like a dog.

Ally: You insist on having the sword in the bed, too.

Murph: Yeah, just like trying to clutch it.

Brennan: Amazing.

Pete: I mean it's a king-size bed. You know, I had a lot of money at one point, so.

Brennan: Pete and Sofie are snuggled up, Cody's at the foot, La Gran Gata gets into the crook of your arm, Sofie, to sleep with you that night. And you can see sort of like sniffs and whiskers at your tummy, and a little bit of magic (mystic bells chime) covers over it, and then settles down into the crook of your arm.

Ally: I make us all some like incredible nighttime tea. It's like peppermint, it's got a little tulsi, it's chamomile.

Zac: Do you put your tooth in it?

Ally: Yeah, I put a little bit of my peppermint tooth in there, stir it around.

Brennan: Incredible, anybody else do anything that night, before the next day?

Siobhan: I think I talk to Jessica and tell her, like,

Iga: Tomorrow you're not going to school, you're coming with me.

Brennan: She goes,

Jessica: Okay, you got it, mom.

Iga: Okay?

Jessica: Okay.

Iga: Okay.

Brennan: She goes, and you can see that she like, the next time you walk by her room, she's laid out like her best pair of boots, a pair of jeans, she's got like the next day's stuff all like ready on a little chair in her room.

Ally: Cute.

Brennan: That night, Pete. You're in dreams again. The Sixth Borough is

cracked apart, but not gone. It is shattered into islands of the former city, floating in void. Manhattan's been cracked apart into like a dozen or more floating things, bits of debris float off into void. You see a little spar of rock that is like the last little bit of Roosevelt Island crumbles. You can see the Night Owl sort of flying away holding Pizza Rat. [flapping noises] Fly off and like hide somewhere else in the city for safety. You see there are a couple places left. Faerie, there's still an island that has Faerie on it. JFK is still out there. You hear a voice speaking. (ominous whooshing)

Null: [filtered, almost staticky, whooshing] What did you do to me?

Pete: Is this Null that I'm talking to?

Brennan: Yeah.

Ally: No, I say that to Null.

Null: How did you put that thing on me?

Brennan: And Pete can tell that by thing, Null is referring to the name Null.

Ally: Oh, whoa. What's… Do you think I can ask it another question?

Brennan: Pete, you think you can do anything here right now. You're safer now, because you are the Vox Phantasma, and you are walking here in dreams. You've gotten a handle on this. Your physical body is not here right now. If this thing tried to attack you, you feel like you might be quicker on the draw to just wake up.

Ally: Okay. I guess I ask,

Pete: What are you afraid of? Are you afraid of me and my friends?

Brennan: You turn around and see Null, which is just your silhouette and outline, canceling out the color of the starry sky behind it.

Null: I'm not afraid of anything. What are you afraid of?

Pete: You.

Brennan: Null moves a little bit closer. The silhouette gets a little bit bigger.

Null: Okay. You know that if I get you, you won't have to be scared anymore. Coming into me is the end of fear.

Pete: I don't believe that. I think coming into you is just letting fear overtake me.

Brennan: You look down at the city, and see in Times Square, a couple more Gladiator signs (mimics popping sound) light up.

Ally: Okay.

(Null’s ominous whooshing)

Pete: Fuck, man so you're just the absence of love and wholeness, and you're, what, you're nothingness? But you want something? I don't get your fucking deal, man.

Brennan: You see Null moves a little closer to you.

Null: I don't want anything. What you see, this is me not wanting anything.

Pete: Where's Nod?

Ally: Can I have a sense of where Nod might be, and try to get there?

Brennan: You get static. (static humming) And Null goes,

Null: There's no such thing as Nod. And soon there never will have been such a thing as Nod.

Ally: Can I somehow magically teleport to Ellis Island?

Brennan: You attempt to go towards Ellis Island, and fly in that direction. Null goes to strike. The thing from beyond space and time moves to get you. You're gonna have to wake up. Give me one, you can either give me an Arcana check if you want magical knowledge, you can also give me a Perception or an Investigation if you want material knowledge.

Ally: Oy vey. I guess I want...

Brennan: And you can do both, too.

Ally: Yeah, I will do both, I think. Okay, so, Investigation. Wait, was it Perception or Investigation?

Brennan: Perception or Investigation, yeah.

Ally: Okay, that's a 6. Arcana, ooh baby, that's a 22.

Brennan: 22 for Arcana. You can't see any of the real people in the world, but you see a world where people feel alone. You see a world where people have fewer and fewer connections to the people around them, they have fewer and fewer connections to their own lives, the stories of where they came from and the ideas of where they're going next. You see blank haze, gray fluid [staticky rushing noise] moving throughout, and you see people. You see people that don't look outwardly empty. There's someone walking through like an industrial park to go work at an office job that has the Gladiator logo over it. You see other people moving around, someone doing customer support from their home, some other stuff. You see a person in a corner office in Manhattan looking over Central Park on a phone. You see they laugh, go blank for a moment, and their eyes blank out and are a digital static for a moment, so their eyes suddenly just become television static. So you don't know who any of them are with that Perception, but on the Arcana, you know that Null has worshippers. But because Null prefers to be nameless, these worshippers don't know that they are worshippers. In other words-

Ally: Are they worshippers or are they prisoners?

Brennan: Pete probably thinks they're both. But Pete sees that this entity has a way of, I think Pete sees into the relationship between Gladiator and this entity as being one of, and this is a weird phrase to use, but not a devil, but like an anti-god. A god that gets stronger the more you don't know its name and don't think about it.

Ally: Whoa. Okay.

Brennan: But it is coming after you, so you might need to wake up.

Ally: Yeah. Ah! I think I'm about to wake up, but right before I do, I think I look in its face-slash-non-face and I'm like,

Pete: My friends and I will prevail, and the love and history and positivity of New York City will step you out like a flame, goodbye.

[dramatic, heroic horn music]

Ally: And then I wake up.

(Emily laughs)

Brennan: Fucking love it. Pete radiates with phantasmagoric light in that confrontation as you say that. The same roar that went out from Kingston's voice in the waking world roars out from your voice in the dreaming. (mimics roar) And a bunch of sleeping New Yorkers feel the power of their dreams return to them [snaps] as you wake up.

Ally: Cool.

Zac: Ooh.

(Brennan laughs)

Pete: Fuck!

Cody: Whoa!

Brennan: The team is on it, baby. You guys wake up the next day, and I guess have have the message to all meet up at Grand Central Station, right?

Zac: Yeah, I text everyone,

Ricky: Hey, can we all go get tiny?

Sofia: I don't know what that means, but sure.

Pete: What's up?

Ricky: I'm just hoping we can all go get tiny again, because I think I found where the juicy cockroach is.

Pete: For sure.

Zac: I tell Sofia,

Ricky: I think it's gonna be a cool thing for you.

Sofia: Uh, okay.

Brennan: Incredible.

Emily: I wonder why Ricky associates me with a cockroach.

[cast laughs]

Siobhan: Are we gonna do this and then investigate the box? Is that our plan? I just want to know if I'm bringing Jessica with me to this or not.

Emily: That works for me.

Siobhan: Okay, cool.

Ricky: Yeah, whatever order makes sense. If you wanted to do that first, that makes sense to me, or.

Iga: No, I think my daughter should come and get tiny with us. I think that she would really get a kick out of it.

Ricky: I'm wondering what's gonna happen when we get tiny, is what I mean.

Kingston: Are we gonna have to get to the Bronx tiny?

Ricky: Well there's that train.

Kingston: Oh yeah, they got trains.

Pete: They got that tiny train, right?

Kingston: Yeah, they got that tiny train.

Iga: Oh my god, they got a tiny train? I got to bring both my kids. I'm sorry, they got to see this tiny train. [to her son] Nicholas, you're not going to school.

Nick: What's that, mom?

Iga: We're going on a field trip.

Nick: Woo!

Iga: For cultural reasons.

(Brennan laughs)

Sofia: Cody, emotionally, do you think you're going to be able to handle it, getting tiny?

Cody: I'm absolutely devastated, but I think it's good for me to do things and not just wallow in what my life, I was gonna say has become, but honestly always has been.

Kingston: Damn, Cody.

Lou’s camera view is so blurry it’s just like the basic shapes of him for a moment.

Zac: Lou may be the blurriest I've ever seen him.

Lou: [coming into focus again] Sorry, I was just so shook by the depth of Cody.

Cody: Just doing a lot of thinking. Yeah, cool, yeah, let's go get tiny.

(Emily laughs)

Brennan: You guys go to meet up at Grand Central. Bazathrax talks to from within your chest, Cody, and is like,

Bazathrax: Dude, where's your cool-ass coat?

Cody: [interrupting] Shut the fuck up, Bazathrax. Shut up, my coat's gone. You were fucking there, dude. You fucking live in my chest. Just stop fucking sleeping all the time, dude. Goddammit. Help me carry this goddamn sword, it's too heavy.

Bazathrax: Dude, I can't help you with that fucking sword, bro. You're gonna have to get me the fuck out of here.

Cody: Are you kidding me? Why are you here, then? Why the fuck are you here, dude?

Ally: "You were there" is so funny.

Cody: You were fucking there, Bazathrax.

Ally: He took my coat, you were there.

Cody: We fucking lost everything. You were there when my coat was gone, man.

Bazathrax: Dude.

Cody: It's been a day!

Bazathrax: Hey listen, dude, I'm your fucking dark infernal benefactor! Here's what I'm thinking, dude. I think your mistake last time was, you didn't draw enough cards, dude. You got to go back and do another reading and get like five or seven or eight of those bad boys.

Cody: The last card I took, if I took two I would be fucking fine, dude.

Bazathrax: Dude, think about it!

Cody: But I took three!

Bazathrax: Half the cards are good, and half the cards are bad. So if you draw all the cards, you are guaranteed-

Cody: This is nothing! That's just nothing, Bazathrax!

Bazathrax: No, dude, fucking shut up! I know math! Fucking listen to me!

Cody: You shut up! Fuck you, dude!

Bazathrax: Shut the fuck up!

Brennan: Cody is screaming fuck you at his chest in the middle of Grand Central.

Emily: I think at this point it's pretty normal. We're used to Cody having one-sided conversations.

Lou: Yeah, I think we just like keep on strolling.

Brennan: Jess and Nicholas are a little put off by it, but you guys get to the Whispering Gallery.

Ally: Oh, I just fill everyone in on the weird dream. Any new info about this. It feels like we're just, like, up to our neck in clues, but I don't, like the mechanics haven't quite snapped in, where I really know what to do or like, yeah.

Sofia: I mean honestly, it sounds like you fucking wrecked that creature's day.

Pete: [shrugs] Fucking Null is fucking nothing, dude.

Kingston: Heyyyyy.

Pete: I'm valid. I'm full.

Cody: You threw a metaphorical fucking Big Gulp right in its face.

Pete: That's fucking right, dude! I wish you were there!

Cody: [not speaking in his normal gruff affect] Yeah, would've been awesome. I probably fucked it up.

Ally: I give you the help action to make your sword a little bit lighter.

Cody: It's still so fucking heavy, Pete.

Zac: It's like 260 now.

Ally: There's no way for me to help. It's 260!

Murph: Even with both of us, we're doing an overhead press of like 130 pounds each.

Brennan: Incredible. You see, yeah, in your head as well, Cody, you hear the Questing Blade being like,

Thirsting Blade: [weakly] Sire, I'm so exhausted. What have you done to me? Wha— What have I become?

Cody: I don't know, do you have the, ugh. You're so sick is the thing. It's all I've ever wanted. If I asked you to just be fucking normal, would you just be normal, or do I need to undo something?

Thirsting Blade: I feel like I'm two other swords as well.

Cody: Yes, you're Thirsting Blade, Dark Excalibur, Mega Genesis.

Thirsting Blade: I'm what? What the fuck am I?

Cody: I don't fucking know, dude! Do I have to talk to the other fucking guys too? Are there other guys in the other swords?

Dark Excalibur: [pompous, growling] Hello, I am Dark Excalibur.

Cody: Okay, you need to go, dude.

Dark Excalibur: Oh god, I think I'm gonna shit. Why? I'm a sword! It hurts in here!

Cody: You have to shit?

Mega Genesis: [“cool” growling voice] What's up, it's Mega Genesis.

Cody: You're so fucking rad.

Mega Genesis: I'm the bad boy of the triple sword.

Ricky: Wait, so Dark Excalibur is not the bad boy?

Cody: They're all bad, Ricky! Mega Genesis, you sound so sick. You need to just get me out of this. You need to fucking kill Bazathrax.

Mega Genesis: You know if you kill-

Cody: [pained] And buy me a fucking shirt! Just buy me a black shirt, man! Please! These pants are so big. I'm a size 28 waist.

Brennan: You all get to the Whispering Gallery. You guys remember the trick of the Whispering Gallery, which is just to go into the corners and ask for one of the clock gnomes to come. The last time that you were here, Misty was the one to do it, but who here walks up?

Emily: I'll give it a shot.

Zac: Yeah, does anyone remember...

Brennan: Cool, Sofia, you walk up.

Sofia: What did she say again?

Brennan: I don't know if you remember, it's been three years.

Kingston: You just got to call a name.

Sofia: I got to call a name?

Kingston: Yeah.

Sofia: Okay, I'll go, Rowan Berry?

[dramatic music]

Brennan: Give me a Persuasion check.

Pete: [head in his hand] Dude!

Sofia: Oh wait, that would be bad!

Emily: I don't say that, I don't say that.

Pete: It's okay, I need to apologize.

Emily: No, no, no, I say-

Lou: Can I make a History check? Oh, go ahead.

Brennan: Oh yeah, make a History check.

Lou: History's 21.

Brennan: You remember the name of the clock gnome that got you the first time was Bilbry.

Sofia: Push me out of the way, Kingston, push me out of the way and say it.

Lou: I don't push, but I think I do see Pete with that, and I'm like,

Kingston: Maybe, uh, not-

Sofia: No, I absolutely, as soon as I said it I realized it was a fucking mistake, please take my place.

Kingston: It's all good. All good. Hey, Bilbry? Bilbry?

Brennan: You guys see in the center of the floor, a little grate, a little smoke. (mimics mechanical sounds) And a tiny little old prospector gnome with a four-wheeled quadcycle where the wheels have little feet on the end of them pops out.

Bilbry: [older man, kind of rustic-sounding] Well, hello there! If it isn't a fine group of adventurers! Mr. Kingston Brown, it's good to see you again.

Kingston: Hello, Bilbry, it's been a while.

Bilbry: Well, it certainly has, that's for sure. Well hello and pleasure. We've been busy, busy, busy, it's been a little while since the last time you all were here. What can the clock gnomes of Grand Central Station do for you?

Ricky: We're trying to get to the Bronx, we're trying to go meet a specific juicy cockroach there.

Bilbry: Oh, get up to the Bronx? Well, you don't need the clock gnomes for that, you can grab the Metro North-

Cody: We need to get tiny, we need to get tiny.

Ricky: We need to get tiny, yeah.

Cody: We need to get so tiny.

Bilbry: [waving his arms around] You need to get tiny, huh? Well, we can see about that! (cackles)

Brennan: You see he puts a bunch of weird runic staves on the ground, makes like a dodecahedron, helix of light.

Bilbry: All right, next stop, itty bitty-ville!

Brennan: And all of you are shrunk down to be about one inch tall as a little hot air balloon descends made out of newspaper with the basket being a box of matches with none of the matches in it. He goes,

Bilbry: All aboard! Next stop, the clock gnome workshop! Toot toot!

Brennan: You see that Nick and Jessica are each just going, [screaming]. They've been to a magical chest, but they've never been shrunk down before. And you guys pile into the matchbox and sail off, once again seeing the little helixing whirl of biplanes and dirigibles and hot air balloons swirling around the clock kiosk of Grand Central Station, and heading up towards the constellations on top of the giant arched roof.

Lou: How big is Dark Excalibur Mega Genesis?

Ally: I was just gonna ask!

Lou: I think I assume as we get tiny, Kingston immediately looks over just to see if the sword is more manageable.

Brennan: The sword is proportionally 100% the same, and Cody is really struggling.

Cody: Still super heavy, Kingston.

Kingston: Damn, hey, I was hoping for you.

Cody: I don't even have a cool duster anymore, so what does it even matter?

Siobhan: I conjure my Mage Hand to help him lift five pounds' worth of the sword.

Cody: [sadly] Thanks, I think we need three or four people.

Sofia: I also have Mage Hand, but I think that my body will help it better.

Zac: Ricky's on like the exact opposite end of the hot air balloon.

Emily: [laughs] As is his right.

Brennan: As is his right. You guys fly through here, you remember the last time you came through here, Pete leapt off of here onto a giant oyster in the food court and shot a dog with a gun but didn't hurt the dog 'cause the dog was the size of a fucking building.

Ally: Yeah, definitely, yeah, for sure.

Brennan: And then a dirty eagle came and rescued you.

Ricky: This was one of the last times I had a cheat day.

Iga: The last, three years ago?

Cody: Three years ago?

Ricky: Yeah.

Pete: You know-

Sofia: You're due for another!

Pete: People at meetings call this a spiral moment. You know, a lot of people think of spirals-

Ricky: A cheat day?

Pete: No! No, just when you encounter a place that you were in a very different place and you get to see your growth side by side. People think spirals go down, but some spirals go up, and you get to look at a past. [spirals his fingers around each other]

Iga: A virtuous cycle, a virtuous cycle.

Sofia: I have a lot of strange memories from the Staten Island Ferry, so.

Pete: Yeah, some spirals hit more often.

Brennan: All of you head towards-

Ally: [jokingly] I jump out of the air balloon.

Brennan: You see that the aircraft heads towards a sudden roiling tempest that coagulates in the roof of the arch. Let me get a Dexterity saving throw from everybody.

Murph: I automatically get disadvantage because of the Thirsting Blade, Dark Excalibur, Mega Genesis. I don't auto-fail, do I? I think I just have disadvantage.

Brennan: You have disadvantage.

Emily: Does anyone have any auras that help us?

Zac: If it's a saving throw, you get a plus four if you’re within ten feet of me.

Emily: Sweet, I get 19.

Brennan: Cool.

Luu: 15.

Siobhan: 18.

Ally: 9.

Murph: I rolled an 11 and a 12, so I still got a 17.

Zac: 18.

Brennan: 18, what did Iga get?

Siobhan: 18.

Brennan: And what did Pete get?

Ally: 9.

Brennan: Even with the bonus?

Ally: Yeah.

Brennan: Incredible. Pete, as you make the joke, you fall out of the aircraft again.

Murph: Oh my God!

Emily: Wait, would Mage Hand, would Mage Hand, though, still work with five pounds?

Siobhan: Oh yeah, five pounds!

Emily: Can I do Mage Hand, but like, Pete’s probably only five pounds?

Brennan: I'm gonna say yeah, you reach out and Mage Hand Pete back up into the air.

Pete: What if I jumped out? Ah!

Murph: Yeah, you were like leaning over the side being like, oh, right, ah!

Zac: “I’m kidding, I’m kidding.”

Brennan: Suddenly you guys appear in the workshop. You see the large dragon trains as they stretch off in all directions. Iga, did Misiek come with you as well?

Siobhan: For sure, yeah, Misiek is always with me.

Brennan: So you go around, you start walking through and see these polished, incredible, beautiful, old-school trains and at the heads of them, these like shaped metal sort of like lion-like dragon heads with horns. And again, these aren't enormous, but they're enormous to you right now, and you realize these are probably just the size of like model trains. They're itty bitty. Bilbry says,

Bilbry: Well welcome back, happy to help you get tiny. If you're looking for a ride north, you can hop into one of the dragon trains as well.

Brennan: Iga, you see that the dragon trains, as you get towards the heads, sniff the air, rear up and perform this elaborate bow to you. (slurps loudly)

Siobhan: Oh, I do an awkward curtsy.

Brennan: A bunch of gnomes come out of this giant cuckoo clock, tick-tocking sort of temple. You see lots of other clockwork gear and springs. It's like a little steampunk model train village in the rafters of Grand Central Station, and all these little spring-loaded and otherwise gear-encrusted gnomes come out. High Priestess Hib-Hob comes out and goes,

Hib-Hob: Oh, my my my. Well, hello one and all. Oh, the dragon trains!

Brennan: And everyone looks at Iga being bowed to by these trains.

Ricky: Iga, have you met these trains before?

Iga: N-no, is this not normal? They're not bowing to people normally?

Ricky: I think they're not bowing to any of us.

Kingston: No.

Iga: Okay, hello trains. How are you?

Brennan: Go ahead and give me a Persuasion check with advantage, if you'd be so kind.

Siobhan: 18.

Brennan: The trains come up and begin to sort of snuffle at your bag and at your clothes, and again, they're huge, they're like enormous trains, but they are sort of like crowding and a long metallic tongue kind of flicks out, forked like a snake's.

Iga: What are you looking for? What are you trying to, get out of my bag! What are you doing?

Brennan: They sort of move back.

Siobhan: I pet them like a really big dog.

Brennan: They go. (pants) And the trains sort of back up back onto the tracks. Yeah, these little trains would be about the size of Misiek, if you guys were normal size. But you do see that your chest sort of gleams as these dragons approach.

Siobhan: Can I pull the chest out?

Brennan: You see all of the trains look at the chest wide eyed, and as into you as they were, they look a little bit scared of the chest and back up.

Siobhan: Can I ask them why they're afraid?

Brennan: Go ahead, if you're using magic or a gift let me know, otherwise-

Siobhan: I actually speak Draconic now.

Brennan: Hell yes. Iga, you speak to them in what you think is Polish, because I don't think, Iga doesn't know-

Siobhan: Yes, I don't think that she know that, but she does.

Brennan: Jess and all these people look up. People that are, you guys might think she's still speaking Polish, but anyone that has an ear for languages is like, that's not the same. And the main thing is, you see Jess and Nick both look up at their mom, and you see that the gnomes all kind of gasp as you do this, because they built these. These are not true dragons, much like Misiek is not a true dragon. There's lots of little dragon-like species that are associated with them that are part of the same larger family. These are also built, they're sort of like magical constructs, but they do speak Draconic, and it's clear from the gnomes' expression that they didn't know they could do that. They were handling them just like animals. Centifax, the main dragon train that you guys met three years ago, looks up and says,

Centifax: [lower voice, little raspy] Smell, good smell on you. Dragon friend.

Iga: Yes, Misiek is my little friend.

Centifax: Dragon friend. True dragon friend.

Iga: Oh, um. [stutters] Mm. I don't know anything about that.

Brennan: They look at each other. You can see that they have this gift of speech, but are kind of playful, bestial constructs. As wild as it is for them to be both artificial and feral at the same time, that's kind of what they're like. You see that they go,

Centifax: Dragon friend, blessed by dragon. Special, magic. Box. Scary box.

Iga: The box can be scary, yes. It's dangerous, it's powerful.

Brennan: Centifax leans forward and scooches back and goes,

Centifax: Dragon trap.

Iga: A dragon trap?

Centifax nods and snorts a little.

Iga: The box is a dragon trap?

Brennan: You see that another train says,

Train: True dragon trap. Powerful. True dragon wise, magic, ancient. Speak from the past, long ago spirits.

Brennan: Another dragon says,

Train: [older-sounding] True dragons cast spells, wear many forms. Palaces of gold and silver. Magic things they collect.

Brennan: You see another one says,

Train: True dragons wise and cunning.

Iga: Oh dear. Have we had a dragon trapped in a box for hundreds of years?

Brennan: Jess puts her hand over her mouth and Nick goes,

Nick: What?

Iga: He's probably pretty mad at us, right? Do you think he will be convinced that I just didn't know?

Brennan: The dragon trains have no answer for you. But you do see that your daughter is here and Kingston is here as well.

Iga: So, we're tiny, right? We're going to cockroach! [raises her hands in clear confusion]

Kingston: Oh, okay. What did the trains say?

Sofia: It didn't sound like Polish.

Kingston: Oh, okay, it wasn't Polish? I thought maybe the trains spoke Polish.

Iga: No, for sure it was, why would it not be Polish? I speak English, I speak Polish.

Brennan: You see Jess looks at you and says,

Jessica: Mom, you weren't speaking Polish.

Iga: What are you talking about? You speak Polish, I speak Polish.

Brennan: She takes a video she took of you on her phone that starts midway through you talking to these dragons.

Iga: Okay, you're always taking the videos of me for the Tik Tok and it's very— what the hell?

Brennan: You see a little picture of Jessica dancing, and it says, TFW when your Polish mom, and like little things are popping up around.

Ricky: The latest challenge.

(all laugh)

Brennan: Yeah, you see a video of you speaking some ancient, primordial language. Ricky, you vibe off that, when you remember reading that Divine Sense off the chest, that there's something in

there that is not divine, infernal, fae, undead, but something ancient and primal, you know what that is now.

Zac: It's draconic?

Brennan: Draconic.

Zac: Wow. Awesome.

Brennan: There was a plan for Iga and Kingston to go into the box with Jess, which is why Jess is here, 'cause Jess wasn't gonna come with you to the juicy cockroach, so Jess is like ready, looking at you, Iga.

[gentle, mystical, chiming music]

Iga: Are you going to be mad at me if the legacy that we have, it changes before it gets to you?

Brennan: She looks and says,

Jessica: Maybe that's kind of like everyone's challenge, mom. The world changes, but you also have to hold onto the past, right?

Iga: Okay, so you're smart. Okay, good.

Ricky: The legacy changing Tik Tok challenge.

Iga: Also don't put that video online, please. Don't put me on the internet, it's not funny for me.

Jessica: Okay, I won't, I won't.

Brennan: So Iga.

Siobhan: Mm-hm.

Brennan: What is it you are going to do?

Siobhan: I mean I do think that it feels weird to go and do another thing before dealing with this thing.

Brennan: Okay.

Siobhan: For me.

Brennan: You're saying Iga would rather go deal with the juicy cockroach and then do this?

Siobhan: No, I think for Iga, I think that she’s like, the time has come.

Brennan: Cool, hell yeah.

Siobhan: But she's also just got shrunk, I don't know if we're gonna go into-

Brennan: Your box is also shrunk, it's an extra-dimensional space, I think you think you'll be okay.

Siobhan: Okay, cool.

Iga: Okay, I got to go. I'm so sorry, I got to go deal with this right now. If anybody wants to come with, you can come with. If not, you can just be carrying the box, I trust you, as you're going to the cockroach. Whatever you feel like you want to do.

Kingston: I'd like to come, yeah.

Brennan: Cool, I think Iga, you take Jess and Kingston into the chest. Nick asks you, he says,

Nick: Mom, do you want me to, like, leave the box with them, or should I take it home? Or I can take the chest with these guys to go see the juicy cockroach.

Iga: Why don't you do that? That Cody boy, he's not a good influence on you. Ricky, now he's a good boy, you follow him around, you can maybe learn something from him. Cody, not a good boy.

Brennan: He looks over at Cody, he says,

Nick: Yeah, he seems to be really struggling with that.

Cody: Bazathrax, why aren't you helping me? You're a devil, you can't just help me lift weight? It's a sword! It's three swords!

Bazathrax: Let me out of the fucking tattoo and I'll help, okay?

Cody: I'm not letting you out of shit, you don't do anything.

Brennan: You guys, Iga, Kingston and Jess disappear, you guys get onto the train, the dragon train races north. You are on a train track on a pipe running through the subway system, so you're on a tiny train watching the giant trains shoot past you in the real subway as you head north [train horn] towards the Bronx. Kingston, you appear next to Iga on a balcony in a fairytale castle, and while you understand that it is an extra-dimensional space within New York City, what's Kingston feeling in this moment?

[fantasy-sounding music]

Lou: Oh, pure shock. We're in like a straight-up castle and there's just miles of forest?

Brennan: A lot of forest, that's right.

Lou: Yeah, I think there was an excitement around possibly seeing the dragon again, but I think it's now just like an overwhelming sense of, what is this thing that was just in New York this whole time? I think there's just a lot of awe.

Iga: Yes, I mean, whatever this is, I don't think it can be the same dragon. Like I've been thinking about it, and sure I came here about the time that your dragon disappeared, but this power has been in this box for hundreds of years. I mean, unless there's two dragons in here, but that seems crazy to me.

Kingston: That's all right, let's not get-

Iga: Let's not think too much about it.

Kingston: Multiple dragons in one box? I mean.

Iga: Multiple dragons.

Kingston: It's a box of dragon. I don't know dragon math, but I'm assuming it can't be more than one dragon per box.

Iga: [stutters] Bluh, uh. You want some tea, maybe something stronger?

Kingston: Yeah, yeah, yeah, why not.

Iga: I've got some vodka and some peach schnapps. Put a little drop of the peach schnapps in the tea.

Kingston: I mean, not too much, 'cause, you know, it is still a work day, and I guess at some point our friends are outside of this, dealing with-

Iga: No, just for strength.

Kingston: Yes, for strength, for strength, I like that.

Brennan: You grab the schnapps. Jess goes to look in the fridge, and you hear her going,

Jessica: Where are the borscht bites?

Brennan: She goes,

Jessica: Oh, there they are.

Brennan: And takes a plate of borscht bites out and pops one in her mouth.

Iga: See, you like them. You like them when you're alone.

Jessica: Yeah.

Iga: Just not when you're with your tiny friends.

Jessica: I don't know, my-

Iga: Your Sophies and your other Jessicas.

Jessica: Look, Jessica F and Jessica K are my friends, okay? There's a lot of Jessicas at the school, and I'm not-

Iga: Yes, because we're all immigrants, and we come here, we'll say, like, what will make my child fit in? Oh, the name Jessica, fantastic, it will work.

Brennan: She smiles, pops another borscht bite. You have a drink. You are suddenly surrounded by ghostly images of all these women.

Lou: Can I see them?

Brennan: Yes, Kingston can see them as well.

Iga: Oh boy.

Brennan: You see an ancient medieval Polish woman looks at you, Iga, and says,

Iga’s Ancestor: Iga Lisowski, you have come here with your daughter to the castle and you have here a man who speaks for a city not in Poland but somewhere across a crazy ocean.

Iga: There are more Polish people in this city than are in a lot of cities in Poland, [waggles her finger] so don't give me this. This is a Polish city.

Brennan: You see that a lot of them (gasps) gasp, and a few of them like pop out of existence, and you see your mom goes like,

Iga’s Mom: Iga, please, I know what is in your mind. You should think very carefully before you go down into the bottom of the castle.

Iga: What am I thinking carefully about, eh? Tell me what I'm thinking about. That my family trapped a being in here hundreds of years ago and just like, were fine with it?

Brennan: You see they look around, the oldest witch looks away, and you see in her eyes the story of a time, medieval period, one of the many times that Poland was like ransacked by Visigoths or something like that, and you see a shape like appearing, and this ancient witch taking this chest, saying an old like charm, and capturing this massive thing in a box. That even that beast, long, long ago in legend, was brought here by some Visigoths, who they got it from, who knows where and who knows what, and she went,

Iga’s Ancestor: Maybe I could have been more honest about what was in the box.

Iga: Oh, so you did know what was in the box!

Iga’s Ancestor: There was a dragon!

Iga: You said oh, I'm never going to investigate it, because you already knew! You already knew what was in the box!

Iga’s Ancestor: These things work better when everyone is extremely mean and never talk about how they are feeling.

Iga: You're not supposed to say the extremely mean part out loud!

Iga’s Ancestor: Well, I did!

Brennan: And she vanishes. Just your mom is left, and she goes,

Iga’s Mom: Iga, I hope you know what it is you are doing, because it will be a big mistake if is a mistake at all.

Iga: Yes, sure, okay, it's a big mistake or it's nothing. That's life, I don't know what to tell you.

Brennan: Jess looks-

Iga: That's what you told me about Oskar, and we're still together! It's happy, we're happy!

Iga’s Mom: Well, there is still time for it to go wrong! [vanishing away]

Iga: Okay.

Brennan: Jess looks up and is like, has this pride in her eyes. She has never seen you interact with these spirits before. She's like,

Jessica: Way to go, mom.

Iga: I'm sorry you had to see that, I'm sorry.

Jessica: No, your mom was like a trip.

Iga: Yes, no, I mean, she, you're a product of your time. She survived a lot of stuff.

Brennan: Jess nods, and you can see her reevaluating the things about you that bug her in comparison to this ancient, primordial woman that was like talking down to you a moment ago.

Kingston: Well I guess, do you want to go handle that thing all those ghost women were yelling at you about?

Iga: Let's do it.

Siobhan: And I add an extra tot of schnapps into our tea, and I give Jessica a little.

Iga: Don't tell anybody, in this country they don't like the children drinking. So just don't tell.

Jessica: [drinks] Hoo!

Iga: You're old enough, it's fine. 12 is old enough.

Kingston: Damn, okay, okay, let's go. All right, all right. We are not in New York, we are in a weird castle, yeah.

Iga: It's medicinal.

Kingston: Medicinal.

Brennan: You head down into this castle. I would like you guys to make either Investigation or Arcana checks.

(whimsical music)

Siobhan: Hm, I'm gonna use a luck point.

Lou: That's gonna be a 17 Investigation.

Siobhan: Still not great. A 12 Arcana.

Brennan: Jessica got a 23.

Iga: She's smart. She's a smart kid.

Brennan: She casts a cantrip that Esther taught her, where she is going around touching books in these libraries as you pass through them, and you can see her touching them (slurps) and instantly having read them as she touches them.

Emily: Wow, that's a cantrip? Impressive.

Brennan: It's called Scholar's Touch.

Ally: Whoa.

Brennan: Reads these books, and then Kingston, with that investigation, you see that these libraries, as you get deeper into the sort of bottom floors of the castle, have all of this ancient fairytale iconography. There's lots of fae stuff here: woods, knights, medieval things, and as you get deeper, there are dragons. Prow of a a viking ship, hanging over a hull, clawed feet on the tables. You see a tapestry of like a young, almost like Merlin figure, but you see that as you're looking at this tapestry, there's a beautiful thing of this like young boy walking, that has an image of like fire in his heart, and you see Jessica being like,

Jessica: Wow, all of these are books about dragons, but they're powerful. This is like palaces, divine, almost like demigods or something. They're not like big scaly monsters, they're like spirits.

Brennan: And she starts sort of going around touching them, she's like,

Jessica: We should be really careful, because it says that they can wear other forms, they can look like other things.

Brennan: And she touches another book out on the table by the tapestry you're looking at, Kingston, and says,

Jessica: Yeah, there's even like legends of dragons like changing forms, like, in the egg, or like as babies, and growing up not knowing that they were dragons.

Siobhan frowns sharply.

Brennan: And you see a pair of giant double doors leading to a staircase going down.

Siobhan: I chug my tea.

Kingston: Yeah, feels like-

Siobhan: Smash the glass.

(glass cracking)

Lou: Okay! I smash my glass.

Kingston: It seems to be custom.

Iga: It's absolutely not at all.

Siobhan: I Mage Hand it into a little pile.

Lou: Okay, I'm sorry, I cast Mending on mine.

Iga: I'm sorry, I just, I needed a moment of release, you know? Sometimes you just need to smash a thing.

Kingston: Hell yeah, it's a big day.

Iga: You ready?

Kingston: Let's do it.

[snare-drum heavy, chiming, tense music]

Brennan: You walk down the steps into the dungeons of the castle. Kingston, you feel a connection to something down here. None of this has felt like New York, but something down there feels like New York to you. As you move down, you see an iron grate, like a prison gate, and through it, glittering mountains of gold. Swords, halberds, lances, banners, even stone towers from, like, ancient Polish castles, and you see on top of one of the mounds, there is a throne, and seated on the throne, dressed all in green with long flowing red hair, is an incredibly beautiful queen. You see that her crown is made of, like, holly wreaths, and she has long pointed ears, and these poison green glittering eyes, ruby red lips, an enchanting looking woman on top of this pile of gold. And Kingston, you feel behind

her, maybe underneath her, buried in the gold, a connection to that New York thing.

Lou: I, like, lean over to Iga before we get too close, I'm just like,

Kingston: I think, I don't know, there's something in here I think is tied to what we're after, but I'm not sure this person is it.

Siobhan: Can I activate my Ghostly Gaze to see what is underneath the gold?

Brennan: Yeah, as you do that divination, underneath the gold is a clutch of eggs, massive eggs, about this big. I'm gonna describe a crazy, I forgot you had this power, so we're gonna skip to the end of this encounter.

Siobhan: Oh no, I'm so sorry.

Brennan: No no no, this is fun. The eggs are, like everything here, Kingston, this is the vibe that was on the Dragon of Bleecker Street. The hoard is beautiful, magical, memories, legends, myths, all the riches of magic itself, and Iga, you see a clutch of eggs, some studded with rubies and they're bright red and fiery, some that are green and everything else like that. The largest of these eggs, and the one that you could swear is almost like moving, you can sense that there's like something in there. This is not an unfertilized egg, in other words. You sense a powerful spiritual presence. That egg is not covered in rubies, and it doesn't look old at all. That egg is beautiful deep, like, granite and marble and brick that is covered in flecks of gold like the sun setting between the streets with colors all over it that you could swear look like beautiful graffiti. There is art, like spray paint art, all over it of music and laughing, people dancing in the streets, and you feel a powerful magical presence coming from that egg.

Siobhan: Can I bow to the woman?

Brennan: So you move through the door into the corridor space.

Siobhan: Yes, and can I Message the egg?

Brennan: Yeah, you can Message the egg.

Siobhan: Can I say,

Iga: Are you the Dragon of Bleecker Street?

Brennan: You only get an emotion back. You think whatever's in there is like a baby, and also it feels like it is, right now, it feels like the thing in there is just potential. Like it's almost like, because dragons are spirits, the thing in there right now does not have a flesh body yet, and it won't until it hatches. It's pure spirit, it is just a golden, gleaming soul. Kingston, as you follow Iga in here, you feel a connection to a powerful soul in this room, and you see the woman on top of the throne goes,

Woman: [low, growling, accented] Iga Lisowski.

Iga: Hello, I did not know you were down here, and that is 100% on me. I'm sorry.

Woman: But Iga Lisowski, I am down here, and I have been for some time.

Brennan: Jessica leans over to you and points at a word in Polish in one of the books from upstairs, and the word she points to is Smoczamatka and she says,

Jessica: [whispering] That's her.

Brennan: And it's a little bit ancient and garbled, but phonetically, this is like dragon mother. You see the woman stands up and moves. As she moves, you see gold in piles far away from her slip and slide as though a form, like, you see she turns into a small bird (mimics bird fluttering) flies over to another perch, and is now seated a little bit closer on a different sort of pile of golden shields, and is back in her form as a woman, smiles again, says,

Smoczamatka: What are we going to do about this, Iga Lisowski?

Iga: I do not know. I do not not know. I feel that there is a lot of context, honestly, that I am missing, and again, these are questions that I should have asked earlier but I'd spent my entire life being warned not to. So I am sorry I was not here earlier, but I am here now.

Brennan: Smoczamatka walks towards you. She looks at you, Kingston, and says,

Smoczamatka: And who are your guests here in the castle that long I have been trapped in?

Kingston: I'm Kingston Brown. I'm from Harlem. It's in New York. I'm a friend of Iga.

Brennan: As you say Harlem and New York, the top of the gold pile rumbles and you see that egg for the first time, Kingston. A beautiful gold-flecked sidewalk pavement spray-painted awesome-looking, beautiful. It's like a graffiti Easter egg, (rumbles) pops out and rolls down the mountain, and you see Smoczamatka goes,

Smoczamatka: No, not you again! (snarls)

Brennan: And a towering dragon, this one bright red and venom green. This one is powerfully built, like a thick-shouldered, almost like a hyena, like one of those powerful shoulder predators (snarls). Opens its wings and takes its nose and nudges the egg back up the mound, and says,

Smoczamatka: Something is wrong with this one! Why?

Brennan: And turns around and says,

Smoczamatka: Listen, we can help each other, Iga Lisowski. I could have killed you the moment you walked into this room. I have killed many that have tread these passageways before. But you are the first to reach out to me and ask rather than take.

Iga: I'm sorry that I am the first, and again, I am sorry that it took me so long.

Brennan: Go ahead and make a Persuasion check with advantage.

Siobhan: 23.

Brennan: Smoczamatka lies down, crosses her enormous claws, and goes,

Smoczamatka: Well then, what are we going to do?

Iga: If I release you from this, are you going to hurt people?

Smoczamatka: I cannot see the outside of this chest, but I will tell you this. I did not build this castle. This was built by the chest. Your mothers and mothers going back a long time built this to keep me here.

Iga: And they took you from somebody else who also was keeping you somewhere? What happened to you? Where are you from?

Smoczamatka: (sighs) Deep within-

Iga: What is your story?

Brennan: On that 23 Persuasion, you see Smoczamatka begins to cry, and shares a story of being a like primeval dragon. You see visions of the Białowieża Forest, this like ancient primeval forest in Poland from long, long ago. This creature was captured by like Visigoths and chained up and used for like battle and then captured eventually by one of your ancestors, who only had seen it as being this dangerous threat, this like wild monster, but the monster had been like captured by this evil king, and this horrifying fairytale of— yes, the dragon being dangerous and terrifying and your ancestors being like, if I can get this thing in a magic chest so it stops burning our villages I'm gonna do that, and then this thing being a thing that should have never been captured in the first place.

Iga: So you were just a baby? You were just a baby and they put you in chains?

Brennan: She weeps.

Smoczamatka: I did not think a human could understand or care about a dragon. I did not know where the chest was. I did not know what we were doing or why but I long for the forest, I long to return.

Iga: There aren't that many forests in New York. But there's a couple of parks, maybe.

Brennan: She smiles and says,

Smoczamatka: I understand.

Brennan: She says,

Smoczamatka: Perhaps I could live my life happily in a park, but I also know I am a creature of the ancient world. I feel like I have missed so much.

Brennan: You see Jessica steps forward and says,

Jessica: Smoczamatka, in the outside world, I think many dragons have died, or changed, or I don't know how safe it would be, but I think whatever...

Brennan: She just looks up at you and says,

Jessica: Mom, you do whatever you think is right.

Brennan: She taps this book and says,

Jessica: I want to study this castle as long as I can, but I'm not worried about how I'm gonna get magic. I know I'll be able to get it for myself if I need to.

Iga: Okay, here is my plan for now. Out there, there is no forest. But in here, there is forest, and you should at least be allowed, this is still a cage for you and I don't feel good about this, but there is a forest here. Would you like to be in the forest? You should not be in this strange cellar.

Brennan: Iga, you look out and see the solid wall of the dungeon, and you look, this castle is your family's legacy. You think you could command the castle, if you wanted to.

Siobhan: I guess I will open the door and widen the stairs wide enough.

Brennan: You open the stairs (mimics boom) and mainly break the curse and the wards keeping this dragon here. This ancient fairytale dragon turns into her form, turns (bells chiming) into a bird briefly, flies up, sees the stairs widen, turns back into this dragon, (slurps) moves back up,

looks out and, again, weeps openly looking over and you see that the dragon takes wing, and as the dragon flies, the forest extends, farther, farther, farther, everywhere it goes. You see it gets to a place where a mountain rises up and it flies over a town suddenly, with people in it. You see a shooting star in the sky. You've let this thing out, and this magical realm that's been inside this chest expands forever. It goes and goes and goes. A magic that was being bottled so as to contain it is released, and suddenly this realm is coming to life.

(uplifting music)

Iga: Oh my god, I just, I didn't even know that I could do this. I feel so bad.

Brennan: Jess puts a hand on you.

Kingston: How were you supposed to know? I mean, you've been told one thing your whole life, and all we know is-

Iga: Oh, you're told things your whole life, your whole life that you find out are wrong.

Kingston: Yeah, but family's special. I mean, when it comes from your community, it's that much deeper.

Iga: Yeah, you got to unlearn some things, I guess.

Kingston: Yeah.

(Iga exhales loudly)

Brennan: You see the dragon returns, Smoczamatka returns to the castle, and looks out and says,

Smoczamatka: This place is a place for me.

Brennan: It looks at you and says,

Smoczamatka: Iga, I am angry, yes, at the years that I lost. But also, I do not mind to live in stories and though your mother's mothers were cruel to me...

Brennan: You see Smoczamatka shakes her head and just goes,

Smoczamatka: I think we should speak to them.

Brennan: And snaps her fingers and all the ghosts appear in here. You see the dragon proclaims,

Smoczamatka: I have been freed by your daughter, Iga Lisowski.

Brennan: The ghosts all, [gasps].

Iga: [pointing aggressively] And don't even give me it! I don't want to hear it, okay?

Brennan: You see the dragon looks and says,

Smoczamatka: Long ago, I was sealed in here with magic. You sealed me in here to draw your power from me. It is not right that Iga should be without this legacy, because this is the history of your family, Iga. But she has also made right what your family did wrong. So I will be free in this realm here but Iga should not go without magic.

Brennan: You see that Smoczamatka looks at you, Iga, and says,

Smoczamatka: I offer you power as my champion. If you wish to take it, it is yours completely, or...

Brennan: She looks and says,

Smoczamatka: Maybe you'll work something out with these ghosts, but it is up to you.

Iga: I would be honored to be your champion. I feel like my debt is not in any way paid to you, and I will do what I can for you. It seems to me that you love stories and I think there are many stories that have been told since you were trapped in here, I'm thinking maybe that is something that you would like?

Brennan: She looks and says,

Smoczamatka: I would love to hear stories.

Brennan: As she does you guys feel the chest arriving at the destination outside of the chest, Iga, and you hear another rumble and you see that egg, the one egg from downstairs, bounce up the staircase, trying to roll out of the castle. And you see that the dragon goes, Smoczamatka says,

Smoczamatka: No, what is with this one egg!

Brennan: And stops it.

Iga: I think maybe the egg wants to go on a journey. And sometimes the story comes to you and sometimes you go to the story, you know what I mean?

Brennan: You see it that Smoczamatka says,

Smoczamatka: No, this egg has been a real troublemaker, I can tell it has been doing stuff to the chest.

Brennan: And you realize that this is the thing that has been changing the outside of the chest.

Iga: Ah, he's got artistic aspirations. He just wants to be an artist. He's got an artistic spirit. I take home with me, come, let me take the egg for a journey.

Brennan: You take the egg and again, Kingston, you feel this profound connection to this New York City egg. And Jess looks at you talking about this different child and gets a little misty-eyed herself and you see Smoczamatka looks at you and says,

Smoczamatka: Yes, the eggs should go on a journey, that egg is trouble. And dragons, we are spirits. I love my family, but whoever heard of two dragons in the same place? No, dragons need their space.

Brennan: She smiles, changes back into the form of that (bells chiming) sort of Woodland Empress, gives you a kiss on both cheeks and says,

Smoczamatka: To understand the past, to reckon with it, and what has been done wrong, but also to know where you came from, these both go hand in hand. Thank you for releasing me.

Iga: I know a nice young man who works at the bookshop, and I think I'm maybe going to give him a lot of commission.

Brennan: [laughs] Smoczamatka smiles and takes off into the forest. Your moms all look and you see your ancient-most mom looks and says,

Iga’s Ancestor: Well, I guess I was wrong about the dragon being unreasonable.

Iga: Seems very reasonable considering she's been locked up for 800 years.

(Brennan laughs)

        Iga: 1200. I don’t know, you’re old. I love you.

Brennan: Iga, Jess and Kingston, exit from the chest.

Ally: Egg-xit.

Murph: I thought the same thing, egg-xit.

Brennan: Exit.

Emily: Nice, nice.

Ally: We're not happy about it, we're not happy about it, all right.

Brennan: All exit from the chest and you guys are in a tiny little like subway station on a pipe, all one inch tall. Iga, as you walk out, you now have the egg in your hand but in front of you is the chest. The chest is covered in trees and ancient castles once more, and you see vibrating and humming with magical energy, because even though this egg is no longer protecting it, the carving of a fearsome free dragon on the top is.

Brennan: Incredible, Iga, Kingston, Jess, as you guys exit the chest, is there any other conversation left?

Lou: I think Kingston turns to Iga and is like,

Kingston: I don't know all your plans for this egg but I'll tell you once that dragon needs a place to stay. I know a pretty good one down near Bleecker Street. Already have a hoard and everything.

Iga: That's good to know. That's good to know. Do you want to hold the egg? Do you want to hold it?

[Emily squeals a little]

Iga: Like a little bit?

(all laughing)

Iga: Be careful with it.

Kingston: Can I just?

Lou: Yeah, yeah, I take it.

Brennan: Kingston, you hold this egg. Feels warm, man, warm to the touch and it's crazy because you've been living the wildest life imaginable for almost 30 years now. You've been in The Unsleeping City and the fact that you're holding a powerfully magical egg, that has a being of pure spirit that will one day become a dragon, but is now just pure potential, but you hold it and you're also like, this is a, like a baby. This is like, needs someone to look out for it. It's just in the little egg, and it's already been fighting to save the city and it's just in a little egg.

Kingston: It's going to do great things. This one's going to do great things.

[Brennan laughs softly, grinning, and claps his hands]

Iga: Kingston, would you like to look after the egg?

Kingston: [laughs nervously] 

Iga: I don't want to put the pressure on you. It's a lot of work, I think. I mean, I don't know. I've never raised a dragon before. I don't know. But, the Vox—

Kingston: I mean, I don't, maybe, we maybe it's like well, let's save New York and then we can talk about co-parent situation.

Iga: Let’s save New York, then talk about it.

Kingston: You seem to have a little bit more-

Iga: Honestly, I should have asked more questions of the mother, she's maybe like, I don't know, heatmap situation.

Kingston: I just want to make sure everyone's comfortable before we make any lofty things but between me and you-

Iga: I have two children, that's enough children for me, you know.

Kingston: I mean, exactly. I'm not going to raise a new kid, but a dragon kid or we can make that work. Let's figure this out.

Iga: We'll figure it out. We’ll figure it out.

[cast laughing]

Brennan: You guys head out, all you see this interaction. It looks like things worked out in the chest.

Ricky: Awesome.

Brennan: Awesome.

Kingston: Oh, things went great in the chest, y'all.

Sofia: Oh, cool, yeah, we just, uh...

Ricky: We just sat in silence.

[cast laughs]

Kingston: Iga was off like thousands of years of tension between humans and dragons. It was really something.

Ricky: I almost talked to Cody, but then I didn't.

[cast laughs]

Brennan: You guys-

Murph: Just kicking the wall.

Brennan: You guys approach. Jess and Nick get back on the train. Jess looks up at you, Iga, and goes,

Jessica: I'm super proud of you, mom. That was so cool. That was so cool!

[gentle piano music]

Iga: I'm so proud of you and honestly, I could not have done it without you really opened my eyes up to some stuff.

Brennan: She gets a little misty, wipes a tear and goes,

Jessica: You opened my eyes up to everything. You're the best mom in the world.

Brennan: Gives you a big hug.

Iga: Thank you, thank you. I know and I try, I love you so much. I love you both so much, you're so good.

Brennan: They give their mom a big, big hug. Jess gets back on the train, smiles, waves and you look and see the richness here of these things that you thought were fighting when your chest was turning from this ancient thing to this New York thing and now you see Kingston with this beautiful New York egg, your beautiful old family heirloom that is even stronger than it was before because you understand it and your awesome kid who has this book of New York City magic and loves borscht bites. And it's the best of all possible worlds.

And they take off on the train, you guys approach through the dark, dank sewers and arrive on a pipe that leads down and scale up to the top of a hot dog cart. The corner of which has a beautiful monastery made of popsicle sticks and crumpled old cans and lights and everything like that. And as you approach the monastery you see, wielding a little toothpick staff, a cockroach comes out and says,

Cockroach Monk: [high and scratchy] Welcome to the Monastery of The Sacred Rat, who so approaches?

Ricky: Sofia, you know how we didn't talk at all in the train?

Sofia: Yeah, sorry.

Ricky: You were asking me repeatedly about what, where are we going? What are we doing?

Sofia: Yeah, yeah. It was a really quiet train ride.

Ricky: And then for some reason, I just never answered. In my head, I was building suspense. What, I wanted to show you was, this is the Monastery of The Sacred Rat. I don't know, I thought you might like it.

Brennan: The cockroach who is now still a little bit smaller than you, Sofia, looks and says,

Monk: Holy crap, you're that lady that had plastic bag shoes back when we saw those fuckin’ horses with big fucking tumors in their heads.

Sofia: I mean, I upgraded,

Emily: I gesture to my Louboutins,

Sofia: But yeah, no, I've worn plastic bags for shoes on more than one occasion.

Monk: Yeah, you were asleep in the trash.

Sofia: Yeah, I've slept in trash. Hey Pete, remember when you we're talking about a spiral?

Pete: Yeah, for sure, yeah.

Ally: I actually take off my Beats headphones.

Pete: What? Are we talking again? Oh, cool.

Ally: I pause my podcast.

(Emily laughing)

Zac: I want to go to the cockroach and bow to him say,

Ricky: I don't know if you're aware of any of this but we are trying to find the juicy cockroach and believe you are it, the juiciest of all cockroaches.

Monk: Ah, get the fuck out of here.

Ricky: I will not get the fuck out of here. You're a juicy cockroach.

Monk: You're telling me I'm a juicy— [suddenly yelling, like Perry] cockroach!

[light shining noises]

Brennan: A bunch of other, you see leaping from the open doors are a bunch of toothpick wielding cockroach monks, who go,

Monks: Hey, you're attacking the master! You're attacking the headmaster of the monaste— Holy shit!

Brennan: You see Marty descends, gleaming with light. He goes,

Marty: Holy shit, the third of three spirits. We've been in this monastery communing with Kugrash for so long.

Brennan: You see all the monks sort of bow and say,

Monks: All is one and one is all. Everything is connected in one universal truth which is that there's a specific rat man, who's a part of everything.

Sofia: Rat? Is it rat Jesus?

Brennan: All of them go [puts fists and hands together and bows] and say in unison,

Monks: We love you, rat Jesus.

[cast laughs]

Ricky: Wait a second, can you actually, can contact Kugrash?

Sofia: Yeah, I'm curious.

Brennan: A junior cockroach monk says,

Junior Monk: Only the best of us can, Marty can do it.

Brennan: He says,

Marty: When I meditate very deeply. I can feel his whiskers.

The camera shows Murph briefly, who has an awkward smile on his face.

Marty: I can feel the presence. He ate the bagel of all things and he knows everything. And even when he knew everything, he still chose to love the universe.

Kingston: You all are incredibly profound.

Pete: He really is rat Jesus.

[Emily laughing]

Sofia: I would love to come meditate here and feel rat Jesus' whiskers one more time. And maybe give him one more perm.

Brennan: Then you see all them go,

Monks: You know how to do the sacred hairdo?

Sofia: [laughing] What's the sacred hairdo?

Brennan: You see they say,

Monks: Behold, rat Jesus in the aspect of the Chinchilla!

[cast laughing]

Brennan: And you see that all of them look around and they say,

Monks: Give respect to these, the apostles of rat Jesus.

Brennan: And all of them start to do Hairy Baby, the little dance.

Brennan demonstrates Kugrash’s hairy baby dance.

Brennan: You see they say,

        Monks: Come into the co—

Pete: The apostles, are they 12?

Brennan: Then he says,

Monk: Come into the courtyard, we got to talk to you, this is incredible.

Brennan: Marty goes,

Marty: Oh shit, yeah, it's incredible. Rat Jesus or sometimes if we want to save time, we call him Cheesus, 'cause he's a rat and he wants the cheese.

Iga: That’s what I like! It's the puns, yeah. Funny.

Pete: It's funny.

Marty: But have you found also the spicy pigeon and unicorn?

Ricky: You are the last one, we found…

[rat army war music]

Marty: Holy moly, you can really contact Kugrash! Well, we have not much time to lose. Fellow the monks of the Monastery of The Sacred Rat. A day has come for...

Brennan: In the distance you hear… (imitates trumpet blaring) The monks all turn to look and they go,

Monks: Oh no! They're here! We've been discovered.

Ricky: Who's here, what?

Brennan: You see they say,

Monks: The thing every insect has to watch out for the most: Ants! You don't want to get ants!

Ricky: What?

Sofia: Wait, cockroaches are scared of ants? You're so superior to ants.

Marty: [flattered] Oh, stop.

Zac: Can I use Divine Sense to see if I can detect anything from the ants?

Brennan: You see (stomping noise) coming over here to the hot dog cart behind you, rank and file legions of ants. You see Marty says,

Marty: Oh, these guys had it out for us since day one.

Brennan: And you see that one of the ants says,

Ant: [British, assertive] Forward, brethren, to the monastery. Destroy them in the name of our glorious queen.

Brennan: Everybody roll initiative.

(all laughing)

Lou: Wild.

Zac: Oh my God.

Brennan: That's all for this episode of The Unsleeping City. Tune in next week, as we have our showdown at the Monastery of the Sacred Rat. [cockroach voice] We love you, Rat Jesus!

Captions extracted by: Kyber Bonsai

Edited by: solsys