B

Breathe – take a breath.  Focus on taking care of the issue at hand and not your emotions.  Breathwork calms our nervous system and allows us to access our logic, problem-solving and reasoning skills.

Focus on Your Exhale, Not Your Inhale.

“Breathe in: 1…2…3…4, and breathe out: 1…2…3…4…5…6.”

R

Relay Concerns – This is your chance to speak up for concerns either you or your loved one have for immediate safety.

E

Eating Disorder History – include top 3 concerns related to the crisis.  Chances are your loved one will need you to be clear with their history. Don’t forget to relay current behaviors, current medications, previous self-harm or suicide behaviors and any other warning signs you’ve witnessed.

A

Advocate - for what you need from the health professional(s) and be honest with what you can manage with your loved one.  It may be your job to communicate your loved one’s concerns to the primary care team.  Be clear about what your intentions are of the visit.

“I would like him/her/them to be admitted”

“Is there a medication that may be working incorrectly, or do we need to consider a new medication?”

“We need a referral to….”

T

Talk it out – Don’t internalize what is going on.  Be open, clear and transparent.  Ask to meet with the primary care provider separate from your loved one if needed.

H

Hear – Listen to understand (rather than respond) without judgement to what the care providers have to say and what your loved one has to say. Write down instructions or care plans so that you can remember later.  

E

Engage - your loved one, the care team and collaborate to create a care plan together.  

“What are the next steps?”

“Who else do we need on our team and can you refer.”

“Is there anyone else that you need to call?”

Caregivers must balance instinct/gut feelings with factual information. You may have to set boundaries with what you are comfortable with and not comfortable with.  This can sound like “I’m not comfortable with that plan because….” or “I am not prepared to accept responsibility and bring my loved one home.”