TRANSLATED BY: devon#9704

IN PROCESS OF TRANSLATION…

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“She who enjoys herself ... radiates her complacency in such a way that is instantly shared by those around him, without the need to make your quality explicit through performance or virtuous acts. She is so convinced of her merits that she does not feel that she has to beat others, not even herself”. — CLAUDIO NARANJO

◯   ◦ The beggar disguised as a king:

⠀⠀⠀In general, enneatype 2 believes that living with high emotional intensity and provoking emotions is what counts the most in life. For that manipulates relationships. It is, in fact, a surreptitious character authoritative mind, because you want to feel above others arousing admiration and a special respect that feeds their pride.

⠀⠀⠀Indeed, he believes that his pride is his strength when, In fact, it is the neurotic and destructive mode of it. The Two falsifies his self-perception: you feel a loving being capable of giving yourself full, when in reality he is a being in need of love (a beggar disguised as a king), who rejects his need, which would make him feel too fragile and exposed to abandonment. Therefore he projects that need in others.

⠀⠀⠀Hers is disguised as generosity. And the stranger catches her on the net of his availability, which is real but he uses it to feed the order. gullo and idealized self-image.

⠀⠀⠀Defines all E2 people to be proud, enthusiastic, curious, passionate, frivolous, self-indulgent, witty, libertines, superficial, happy, manipulative, intense, flattering, invasive. You are optimistic, despotic, naive, exaggerated and somewhat gonzada. It is as if something Dionysian remains in them in a imperishable and love was the engine of the world. They are the big enneagram hedonists, along with those with the E7. Now, the Two is a very primary hedonism, which has to do with the immediate sensory pleasure of being pleased and loved.

⠀⠀⠀Like a child, he is in intimate contact with love, but also with caprice and tyranny. Listening to Mozart, of the subtype Two conservation, gives us the possibility to feel life as the feel of an E2. There is color, harmony, warmth, play, joy, enjoyment, a kind of communion with the divine; and also tragedy, chaos, sadness and a deep pain, cleverly concealed behind a historic smile, hermal, like that of the protagonist of the movie Amadeus.

⠀⠀⠀The person of this character knew love, was seen and loved. He came like a breath of fresh air to his house, but he learned too much. I soon realized that love had a price. Where appropriate, be used as an object, emotional support or merchandise between his parents, which gave rise to a feeling of humiliation and the development of the I cry like passion.

⠀⠀⠀It is paradoxical that, in reality, these eternal children did not have they saw childhood. It was the price they paid to continue receiving the admiring love of his parents and maintaining his place of power: a suffocating ono that allowed him to be seen but left little space to just be a child.

⠀⠀⠀And this is his life: An incessant attempt to reconquer that place privilege that only children can have. An urge to recover a loving gaze of approval and appreciation that It was necessary to feel worthy of being loved. Return, after all, to paradise so lost.

⠀⠀⠀And in that endeavor, he has learned how to shine and the art of manipulation, and he knows how to alternate sweet words with a more or less subtle, depending on the subtype. His developed empathy is the compass that tells you what others need. And, as a charmer of snakes, he will dazzle his lover in turn or the person, smearing him with compliments and favors, until the other finishes thinking that it is a privilege to have you in his life. Of that devotion that he manages to awaken in the other is what the Two feeds on.

◯   ◦ Let us begin to differentiate the three subtypes:

⠀⠀⠀“My way of being is the result of becoming an adult too soon for not being able to allow myself to be a child. He thought that “by making me older I would be more loved by my parents, who praised me for my responsibility. Thus, he did not allow me to live the traits that he associated with childhood (they say they are from E2 conservation): dependency, irresponsibility, being capricious, even cuteness. They are part of me. I refused them until I bumped into them in the therapeutic process. Although I believe I am of the sexual subtype, the Social one is what comes later. The Social aspects prevailed in me in the first part of adolescence, when what most interested me was power; I always was the leader or boss of something. In the neighborhood gang, in the school band, in the boy scout patrol ... I liked to rule. And so it was until the awakening of the sexual instinct. Then I stopped becoming so interested in ambition, although not entirely, and I began dreaming of romantic love affairs and looking for the ideal woman”. — LUIS HERNÁNDEZ

⠀⠀⠀An early accountability, as just described, it can be essential for the formation of this character. His fantasy sia of grandeur allows you to validate the idea that you are special by what day not because of who he is. From that vantage point avoid contacting him feeling of inadequacy that he has since childhood and with his urgency to be protected and guided.

Conservation 2 — Privilege:

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“If the emperor wants me, let him pay me. Well, just the honor of being with him is not enough for me.” — W. A. MOZART

⠀⠀⠀E2 conservation has been the whim of mom or dad, the girl eternal that continues to seek the favor of the elderly. Just as the emperador (E2 Social) is the most intellectual, and the king (E2 Sexual), the most emotional, the prince is the most active (and dependent) of the three. He uses his fragility and “giddiness” to gain favor. He’s selfish, whimsical, cuddly and playful. Unlike the two other subtypes, he manipulates from a more childish position, much like a child would.

⠀⠀⠀The Conservative Two seems to have the right. He can act like he is superior to others and expect preferential treatment, reaching be cheeky in your expectation of being pampered and throw a tantrum if he doesn’t get what he wants. His logic is: “I give and do a lot for the rest; That’s why I deserve special treatment”. As if, unconsciously, it will count by the hour how much has been sacrificed for the other. It may seem that he’s going to be a diva.

⠀⠀⠀When he's around the other, he’s the subtype most prone to burnout, regardless of your own needs. Do not rest enough, you do not spend time. He loves to receive people at home and cook, but such once he is not allowed to enjoy the dinners and parties that he offers. Rest unconsciously that their needs are met, but few pieces are able to ask for help frankly, but hopes that someone else guessed it. In short, he tends to feel like a martyr and to think that the other is in debt for services rendered.

⠀⠀⠀Proud of his sacrifices, his motto is “I have the right” (to which compensate them). He comes to this conclusion, as a child: “I’m more important”. And since then he’s focused on satisfying his wishes; he puts all his desire there. He is the most greedy with his things and the one who shows the most selfish of the three subtypes.

⠀⠀⠀The demand for rewards for the many sacrifices coexists with excesses of food and drugs to inhibit aggressiveness. The denial of problems alternates with complaints: he goes from “I don’t need help. Nobody cares about me.” He often resorts to emotional manipulation, blaming the other to achieve the satisfaction of their needs. (and when he dares to express them, he seldom takes the lecture courses offered to you.)

⠀⠀⠀In his less sane expression, the Conservative Twos present such a great negligence with his physique. Disorders are common eating disorders, psychosomatic syndromes and hypochondrial disorders. In any case, the repression of emotional needs or aggressive feelings can lead to serious health problems.

⠀⠀⠀Actually, E2s are generally little cared for, since their great goddess self-image makes them feel invulnerable.

Social 2 — Ambition:

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“I have long conversations with myself. and I’m so smart that sometimes I don’t understand not a word I say”. — OSCAR WILDE

⠀⠀⠀The Social Twos are known for their ambition to be in everyone’s heart and to be publicly recognized as leading people. They directly seek attention and confuse being thought of with being loved. They may act provocatively or hostile in order not to be ignored. Or marry influential people and focus your energies on the couple’s goals, raising children to succeed in this world. Model mothers and competent wives are frequent in this character next to E3.

⠀⠀⠀The worst thing in this world is not being on the lips of others, but not being in nobody’s mouth. Being talked about is awful. That they do not talk, it is worse.

⠀⠀⠀The Social instinct of the E2 is expressed in the motto: “I’m a friend of everybody”. There’s a strong desire to be valued by all the people of its social sphere. They like to introduce people and organize meetings at home. They are very efficient at making themselves needed and experts at creating networks; today they could be called influencers. The others are surprised at how they treat almost everyone, from staff to cleaning the manager who does not know anything, with a close familiarity that makes them trustworthy. Another motto applicable to this subtype is: “information is power”. And they have made it their own since they were children.

⠀⠀⠀They like to put themselves at the center of attention in the social sphere and have a strong need to be remembered, fearing to pass unnoticed or feeling left out. They become intimate with people valued in the group, until they are their indispensable support. If they feel insecure about their power of social fascination, they cultivate new skills. They try to impress by giving advice; spiritual, financial, doctors ... or with allusions to important people as if they know in privacy. This puts them in trouble, because the desire to be known that they are friends of VIPs may lead them to be discreet and reveal confidence.

⠀⠀⠀Social Twos most trapped in their character structure may frustrate their own by scattered, with that wide range of contacts and not really paying attention to anyone. They are paternalistic and like to do favors, but making it clear to the other person all they have done for him: “What would you do without me?” It’s the classic accomplice Ice that covers up the misdeeds of an important guy to make him feel in debt.

Sexual 2 — Seduction:

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“In Madrid I never got to step on the street, because every time I appeared At the door of the Ritz, a legion of knights threw their cloaks at the ground so that I would walk on them, laying before me a rug that had no end.” — KILL HARI

⠀⠀⠀The E2 Sexual moves between seduction and aggressiveness, and combines fascination and sensuality. It’s the most explicit, spontaneous and wild of the three subtypes. Just as the Social Two seduces from the intellectual, and conservation, from tenderness, sexual does it from the carnal. Is invasive and if he wants something, he takes it, just like the Sexual E4 or the E8.

⠀⠀⠀Sexual 2 puts his empathy at the service of seduction more than out of a true interest in the other. He knows how to weave cobwebs from which It is difficult to escape because he is passionate when he is in the conquest.

⠀⠀⠀Is a person who knows himself special and wants to be unforgettable; His only one longing is to be adored again.

⠀⠀⠀Her basic interest is to find romantic union, fusion, and con merges being desired, where he is a master strategist, with being loved and valued. He can be a prodigal and forgiving father, or a lover passionate and caring, or both.

⠀⠀⠀If you meet resistance, press and provoke, to disarm the objections. He can also accuse in a furious manner, approaching to the E8. Underlying his outbursts of anger is a melancholy desire for a total and enveloping connection with the other, aspiration close to E4.

◯   ◦ Some common confusions:

“Pride is related to the opinion we have of ourselves; vanity, with what we would like others to think of us.” — JANE AUSTEN

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 can be confused with Social E3 and, although subtle, there are determining differences. The image of E3 is more chameleon, unique; Instead, the Two pretends to adapt, as a means to reach your objectives. The E3 is finer and more sophisticated, and the E2, more called mative, with a more personal style, which can be a bit eccentric.

⠀⠀⠀The Three controls his emotions more, especially in public, because it gives more importance to its image being damaged. The Two, on the other hand, in his aggrandizement he doesn’t see the consequences of his vehemence and condescension. If there is a conflict, the E3 will keep the forms so as not to lose its image. Person E2 is more counterphobic, she becomes passionate believing that she will be able to convince the other and ignores the signs indicating that you are in danger of being excluded.

⠀⠀⠀They are both competitive. The E3 seeks recognition that is good and competes to be valued for it. Two “knows” what it is the best and wants to be given its rightful place. The E3 experiences anxiety and doubts for fear of not succeeding. The E2, however, he’s confident that he’s going to make it: his crazy idea is that he won’t need to compete, when he has been competing all his life, with father, mother or siblings, even from a place of superiority.

◯   ◦ The fear that hides passion:

⠀⠀⠀In the E2 conservation pride is not as visible as in the rest of Subtypes, hidden as it is by a childish image.

⠀⠀⠀The proud belongs to the triad of the image (E2, E3 and E4), so the primeval fear, even before not being worthy of to be loved is to not be seen. Disappear from the sight of the other, be it princess, queen or empress, it means death. At the same time, your homework is to see the other, who he only takes into account in relation to himself.

⠀⠀⠀The fear of conservation E2 is to bequeath to helplessness and not be able to support his basic needs by himself. So I know anchor in its most childish part, seeking dependence and authorization of someone to protect you.

⠀⠀⠀The sexual E2 is afraid of being alone, so he’s passionate about giving. Like the protagonist of “How to be a Jewish Mother”, delusional meta about her desire to give herself to her children, but also about how to create ingrained feelings of debt and guilt.

⠀⠀⠀The Social E2 subtype needs, to feel safe, to be the person of reference to his surroundings, for which he renounces his emotions and Surrender to his own ambition or a cause.

◯   ◦ Three mothers are talking:

“My son adores me”, says an E4. “He just gave me a ticket for an Alaska cruise”. — “Well, he idolizes me”, replies an E3. “He gave me the se Well past an apartment in Miami to spend the whole year under the sun”.

⠀⠀⠀To avoid its latent fear, the conservation E2 disconnects from her sexuality and thus play the role of a girl. The Sexual E2, of his intellect, to respond to patriarchal models of conquest. And the E2 Social, of emotion, so as not to lose sight of the ambitional object. Do not feel the exhaustion or think about the self-demand to which you submit.

◯   ◦ The lighthouse is love:

⠀⠀⠀Each character gives meaning and value to life. In the case of E2 sounds like a lighthouse and, at the same time, the engine is love. In love with the fantastic image they have created of themselves, no wonder that is offered as an inexhaustible source of pleasure, well—being or protection ... even those who are not interested. Its objective is to “Recover what they experienced as unconditional love in childhood”. The three subtypes seek an intense and inexhaustible loving contact that fills the void masked behind a childish egocentricity of which no they end up detaching.

⠀⠀⠀The conservation E2 person lives it in relationships where they feel pampered and protected. The Social E2, when recognized for its worth, especially who she considers an authority. And the sexual E2 goes to eroticism, but always to feed the pride of being not with any love, but exceptional, unique, eternal, that can fill the existential void.

⠀⠀⠀It is said that Two cannot love because she only loves herself same. The truth is that he only recognizes himself worthy of love when he gives, when he does, when he helps. He does not know how to love himself for who, yes and look for in the other’s gaze to be kind. Host the idea that if they need you, they will love you.

⠀⠀⠀So even though I go enjoy king, is nothing but a beggar, a hungry for love, capable of anything, including manipulation, self-expression, plotting or cruelty, if necessary, to obtain it.

⠀⠀⠀The princess, in love with her childish image, only pretends the affection of her protector on her turn. The queen goes further; in love of love, she seeks the devotion of her closest lovers and friends.

⠀⠀⠀And the self-proclaimed empress craves the love of her empire. The Two Social did not find her place in the family with respect to siblings. Hence her need to please everyone. It is as if other ”systems” will look for that site that she could not find on her own; pleasing the entire audience.

“We have felt orphaned of parents and siblings and we long for that emotional network continuously. The more the merrier.” — MONICA ANGULO

⠀⠀⠀Of the three loves, all the subtypes share a love compassionate and erotic. They differ in that the E2 Conservation It has a more compassionate component, like a mother; the E2 Sexual, more erotic, like a son; and the Social E2, like the father, more admiring.

⠀⠀⠀The proud establish unequal power relations. The E2 sexual is the active one, the one he proposes, the masculine one. There is in the E2 conserved a more passive-feminine behavior. Take a stand down, without proposing so much, waiting to be told how to do things.

⠀⠀⠀Offers tenderness, joy, innocence, the adventure that only a child fresh and witty can offer. The sexual E2 offers passion, fire and intensity, as a teenager does. And the social E2, closer from the adult world and from a very paternal role, offers security dad, dignity, protection, and even salvation, if necessary.

⠀⠀⠀Sexual Two is dependent on the intimacy with others. Physical and emotional. If the Two Social needs to be friends with everyone, the Sexual Two is to be the best friend of a person. It is concentrated with few people, and he loves to consider himself the friend number one of his friends, the most intimate confidante of his. It is fascinating spending moments with each other, telling each other secrets, talking about the relationship and feeling informed about the preferred topics of the other.

“We seduce, using lies, and we pretend to be loved by ourselves.” — PAUL GRALDY

⠀⠀⠀Seduction comes naturally to all self-conscious. They do it without barely putting conscience into it, without measure or the slightest scruples, they take responsibility for the consequences it may cause. The three subtypes despise, in their depths, people who give in to your seduction. In fact, they enjoy manipulating and humiliating your suitors.

⠀⠀⠀The word seducer is associated with Two in general, but it is applied especially to the sexual Two. The new guys know how to seduce each one of them. But the E3 Sexual is produced by paying a lot of attention to you, always available to listen to your problems. A marked Sex availability can also be part of the picture.

⠀⠀⠀He centers his passion in the act of conquest and in his own eroticism. If you are suddenly in doubt about your ability to fascinate, a person of this subtype begins to besiege the other, invaded for the fear of not being descada. He hardly accepts a “No” for an answer.

⠀⠀⠀If the Social Twos like to expand their circle of friends, the Sexual person prefers to have friends just for himself, becoming extremely jealous and possessive: watch the other if I want to lose sight of him or have him out of her reach, compulsively controls, and is unable to accept a bad reaction, even setting traps or tormenting the object of his romantic obsession.

⠀⠀⠀If the Sexual E2 attracts with all her sexual energy, with each part of her person, the Conservation E2 seduces with an apparent innocence with his naivety, with her ignorance and inexperience. I can’t do not protect someone so tender and helpless, who wakes up the maternal and paternal instincts. Less permission is given to choose and he is involved in relationships devoid of erotic love.

⠀⠀⠀Conservation uses seduction to achieve the first village. Of course, she wants to be laid-back , but in a “different way”. It is not sold as an erotic object but as a pill rejuvenating, which promises: “With me you will never get bored”. In exchange, she receives in perpetuity the title of princess de la casao the Mommy’s right eye.

⠀⠀⠀The Social E2 is active in conquest, but less passionate than the sexual one, since his purpose is not so much to be dislodged but to obtain ner power through your love relationship.

⠀⠀⠀His seduction is directed at the group, when what he really needs needed is intimacy, and from the intellectual, trying to reproduce the place of power that I hold as a child. For this it offers protection, contacts, advice ... adopting an attitude of superiority.

⠀⠀⠀So the Conservation seduces to receive, the Sexual them to share and the Socials to give.

◯   ◦ Lack and overabundance:

⠀⠀⠀The Two is among the most narcissistic characters. With his fantasies of great personal importance, a concept of himself as a special person, who actually hides a total lack of confidence in their own worth. Self-image excessively inflated covers another devalued one that, if it emerges, causes an excruciating shame that can lead to despair.

⠀⠀⠀The E2 does not show the deficiencies of it. That would mean appearing vulnerable, that is, weak, defective, useless, in the eyes of others: a direct path to rejection and abandonment. To camouflage his humanity dad, he stands before the world haughty and with a special brilliance. What a skillful actor, he resorts to the mechanism of repression, with which he mutes any need or emotion that makes you connect with the internal feeling of fraud and lack.

⠀⠀⠀The three subtypes repress, above all, envy. The one who has the most contact with it is the conservation E2. To hide it, the Two becomes enviable and seems to offer a generosity shrouded in optimism. Himself, without explicitly asking for anything in return. Thus, his pride nurtures a sense of superiority (it would be better to call it invulnerability) that does not allow her to express his weaknesses but rather indicates rightly, through manipulation, whims, a disdain disguised or hostile rage.

⠀⠀⠀The generosity of the E2 type is inauthentic, since more than to donate what he does is to flatter to enchant. It depends a lot on the admiration that he arouses, becoming very attentive to what he gives and gives, taking care of what is good. Consequently, it is unlikely to thank you.

⠀⠀⠀The sexual and social E2s are so full and lucky, they seem immune even to illness or death. He says Karen Horney, speaking of neurotic pride: “They avoid any thoughts that might harm their pride. The more significant example is to avoid thinking about death, because the idea of dying like any other mortal is unbearable for them. The Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde [A Social E2] is an artistic presentation, ethics of the pride of eternal youth”.

“l was very surprised when I realized that I was getting older; someone like me shouldn’t have an expiration date”. Adds a woman of this subtype. — Ana Baza.

⠀⠀⠀Conservation Two, on the other hand, needs you to come see him, to be pampered; there’s a fear of being left alone in his illness. His contacts lack more than the other subtypes. This adult who goes out into the world as a child feels less capable, more insecure, he devalues more easily and shows himself more needy. Express more openly the need for him, allowing himself to claim and protest more than the sexual Two and the social one, more self-sacrificing and resistant.

⠀⠀⠀When he receives something, the first thing that comes to E2 conservation is that he is undeserved. He also shares the insatiability with E4: after a whim comes another, and another ... As if there was a monton of pending wishes waiting for the occasion to be satisfied. What he does not have and what he does not know can be shown as something.

⠀⠀⠀The proud feel a step above the rest, convinced of being important to the other; and they, at the same time, self-sufficient. Sexuals are the superabundant by excellence. They do not lack anything; what’s more, they have everything the other needs, like the mamma with the big tits full of milk, to feed us all and have us trapped; how could a still full, wonderful and special person need something or someone? He seduces who has, not who needs, and he will not allow himself to bring a crack in that image of overabundance so well samblada.

⠀⠀⠀The sexual pride seeks to be someone through love life. Look at his anguish being irreplaceable. His feeling of importance tancia feeds on the pleasure she gives. The conqueror and the femme fatale are the characters of a passion for conquest that goes beyond fall in love or fall in love; what excites him is being indispensable to him object of desire.

⠀⠀⠀The Sexual E2 covers his miseries very well with seduction. Intellectually, to adapt to what the other wants, you can interact with something, but always in a superficial way. Wake up many you envy because he seems to achieve everything he sets his mind to ... but also it also fails. Now that is covered up by his fantasy or his attilondon, so that others can only see the light part. Minosa of the facade.

⠀⠀⠀The Social E2, in short, is the subtype that establishes the least contact with the lack. He anesthetizes himself by throwing himself into action. Like the Sietes, he has a dense schedule full of activities, which makes him feel essential. Like the other subtypes, it takes refuge in fantasia; where appropriate, laying out plans, coordinating projects or making contacts.

⠀⠀⠀He likes to feel like the director of an eight-ring circus. To E2 Social, that there’re problems to solve gives meaning to your life and allows you to disconnect from your needs. The maddened rhythm to who submits keeps the feeling of being insufficient under control and, if for some reason he falls ill or fails, he locks himself at home until the storm passes with hardly anyone knowing their situation.

◯   ◦ Deep self-devaluation:

⠀⠀⠀The self-assertive strategies of this Enneatype are thoughts of a deeply damaged self-image the apparent grandeur of the E2 is corroded at the base, great feelings of humiliation, inferiority, guilt, inadequate tion and lack of authenticity.

⠀⠀⠀The Two harbors the intimate conviction of a radical lack of value, and that is what triggers the compensatory impulse of the order. Gullo, which inhibits envy. In order to keep the fragile walk My journey of pride, you must act to receive continual rewards. The sexual subtype finds them mainly in relationships sentimental. The Social obtains its triumphs in other areas.

“Joy became an unfathomable well of sadness and disappointment. Later I realized that the main perception was that neither emotionality hadn’t changed. I didn’t feel any more loved, even congratulated; I did not feel more valid although I did feel more famous. The unconscious expectations deposited were that my world of insecure Rity, inferiority and lack of esteem would have ended and it was not like that”. — TONI AGUILAR

◯   ◦ Fantasy. Better Dream:

⠀⠀⠀Where the E2 navigats best is in reverie. Fantasy is the strategy that all three subtypes use as a refuge from pain and frustration. Since he was little he has needed to escape from a mess the emotional world that no one helped him to structure or give exit. He has learned to create a reality tailored to his needs, more appealing that the one you get out the door or even in your own home, developing a great ability to disconnect. Color any want failure or loss as something unimportant ends in depression more or less covertly.

⠀⠀⠀The princess imagines that the whole kingdom has realized what unique and wonderful that it is, in a fairy tale where all its descos are fulfilled. The queen dreams that she is the sublime lover, mother, daughter and partner, who they adore unconditionally. And the Empress delights in knowing herself magnanimous and imagining great works that will be applauded for their creativity.

◯   ◦ Emotionalization. “I feel, then exist”:

⠀⠀⠀Emotionalization, as the opposite of intellectualization, is common to the proud. They “gawk” believing that only if you feel with intensity is authentic. Since life is emotion, they like to inject emotion into everything. They substitute the word “think” for “feel” as if that makes it more real (what one thinks can be refuted).

⠀⠀⠀Only the emotion counts, then. Minus the guilt. That’s just the Experimental. If anything, a narcissistic shame of: How not someone like me could.

⠀⠀⠀But all three subtypes deny what they feel, blame others of their discomfort and hide when they feel vulnerable. With the E2 conservation it is not easy to know what happens to him because he lives on the surface of his emotional world, in constant denial of the pain and aggression. He is the most crybaby, but he gives himself the least permission to show your anger and, when you go out, it is in the form of complaints, irritability and tantrums. Although he is very susceptible, it is difficult for him to connect with external aggressions; he reacts late.

⠀⠀⠀Sexual and social do have a more direct contact with the rage, being able to stage disproportionate tragicomic situations nothing and one hundred percent manipulative.

“I call it the “vaudeville”. Life is a theater, a game where hardly there are limits and where emotions, if they are not intense and dramatized, they don’t seem authentic; they simply are not. This waste of energy and dishonesty wears out the relationship with the other.” — ANA BAZA

⠀⠀⠀The Two sexual is the most theatrical and intense. You allow yourself to get angry and react quickly to external aggression. The social Two is more rigid and stiff. Save more forms than sexual, especially in public, and when it finally explodes, it does so from a position of power that ensures success. He can then be ironic, cruel or ruthless, with himself and with others.

⠀⠀⠀“I feel like I have great masochistic defenses, giving me things so as not to feel what is painful and difficult for me; until in the end I connect with that rage and explode and from disproportionate and excessive. So much so that I can be very hurtful and I don’t see the other at all. There I’m ashamed of myself for having reacted that way, and I start to suffer for the image that I project. (The great difference with the E8 is just that, he does not regret or feel that judgment internal against himself)”. — MONICA ANGULO

⠀⠀⠀The Social E2 is the most intellectual of the proud. To go out into the world and succeed, to be a leader, you need to use your mind, in order to organize, create strategies and make decisions, leaving aside the emotional warmth. It inhibits your emotions more, then, than the rest of subtypes.

⠀⠀⠀The Sexual E2 is the most clearly anti-intellectual subtype. In its life there is no room for reason. It dispenses with the intellectual; arrives even to despise him, since his feeling is the most important thing. Flees therefore of common reasoning and logic. It’s the most impressive, provocative and wild. He needs to feel free, he cannot bear the limits of you and love transgression. In this, as in the search for intensity, it’s very close to E8, becoming destructive or self-destructive.

⠀⠀⠀Conservation E2 may be more intellectual than sexual, if thinks that this will promote pampering and attention or guarantee the protection of a loved one. Also in his eagerness to appear dependent needs to nurture his intellect. But it does not reach the levels of the social E2.

◯   ◦ Of the dependency:

⠀⠀⠀All Twos are emotionally dependent, although each one with his own camouflage. The conservation E2 is the most dependent, even if she thinks not and shows the world an image of self-sufficient. Many leave their family with the idea that distance decreases dependency, but it does not usually work. In fact, he does not know how to maintain relationships without falling into dependence. That is why it is so difficult for her to form her own family and commit terseness. This is the difference between sexual and social, which have less fear of pairing and unpairing.

⠀⠀⠀With the Sexual E2 it’s different. Live each romance as if it were the only and definitive. Anyway, if it depends on something, it is the love and feeling loved.

⠀⠀⠀Social organizations, for their part, are intolerant of any limitations, their own or someone else’s, and they act from counterdependency, insofar as they that love does not interest them too much.

◯   ◦ To responsibility:

⠀⠀⠀None of the three subtypes are attracted to ordinary things, and everyday responsibilities are very boring. Each one in his own way seeks that life has a more intense tone, bright and quirky.

⠀⠀⠀E2 Conservation, because of its attachment to the infantile, is the least responsible for all three. He has been quite protected as a child. When asked for something, he tends to think “I can’t”, “I don’t know how to do it”, “I’m too busy”, or “I’m exhausted”. He overflows, instead of energy for pleasant things.

⠀⠀⠀The Sexual E2, on the other hand, with its overabundance, sells better your ability to take responsibility, and shows more willingness to care and sacrifice for others.

⠀⠀⠀Due to its desire for power and to dominate groups, the Social E2 is the most responsible and hard-working, and assumes high responsibilities in the diverses areas of his life. For that he needs to be extremely demanding people, rigid and controlling.

⠀⠀⠀Another trait that defines the proud, devoid of limits and given to excesses, is his taste for freedom. What he really wants is to be pleased. That is, do what he wants, when he wants, with whom he wants and how he wants. He calls that freedom.

⠀⠀⠀The Two of conservation is capable of giving up freedom to change of affection and protection. The Social Two buys it while being an important guide and thanks to the status that he is acquiring; although he is dependent on the group image of him. Those who vindicate his freedom and they use it in a more intense, provocative and rebellious way are the Twos sexual.

◯   ◦ Permissiveness:

⠀⠀⠀The three subtypes are rigid and, in their polarity, permissive, you and self-indulgent with your failures or forgetfulness. The Social E2 shows itself condescendingly with the mistakes of others, but only as a manipulative strategy. And with himself, he can go from a high demand to the absolute lack of awareness of his responsibility.

“I can go from excess workload and stress to a clear:  I’m unemployed and no I don’t even make the egg ... because I need it. All very polarized. Still, there’s more expensive difficulty in stopping”. — MONICA ANGULO

⠀⠀⠀The Conservation E2 is very flexible in your everyday life. Does not give importance where you leave the rags in the kitchen and accept when al. they are moved around, since he highly values the freedom of He tries to let others do what he wants with his seduction childish, sweetness and meekness, but you need to make sure you have bation; that is, what he wants is also what the other wants, laugh, and he’s very frustrated if he pouts at him.

⠀⠀⠀The Sexual E2 is the most permissive, but also the fastest can pass to the demand and demand of great sacrifices for the other to demonstrate his unconditionality.

◯   ◦ Make to be

⠀⠀⠀The three subtypes are characterized by being dynamic. The Conservation 2 is the one that focuses the most on doing for the other, I know about your self-care. It’s also the one that least focuses on its activities. He may know where he would like to go but is entertained by the road.

⠀⠀⠀The sexual are the most emotional among the emotional and, although they appear electric, they move only when there’s an object. Clear in sight, because the intense emotionality with which everything impregnates them exhausts them. At work they do what they do, but I know they focus on what they like, they get lost in the details and they look worth more than content.

⠀⠀⠀The Social E2 is the most disciplined but, at times, fickle. Use your mind to spot opportunities and quickly move on to specify. Too bad I can’t do everything I know compromises.

◯   ◦ Ambition

⠀⠀⠀The conservation person seeks power through the other, that is, employs his efforts to conquer the figure of power, rather than wanting to come to power by herself. That is the difference from the Social E2 colder, stronger.

⠀⠀⠀Conservation Two first of all prefers to ensure a comfortable life, fashion, pleasure and avoid the efforts that would take a lot power or be very important. Yet the ambition remains, and takes the form of demand, especially with others. Your process must always be ascending, and if not, you will let the fantasy make you think yes.

◯   ◦ Maternity

⠀⠀⠀Sexual E2 is the most maternal. She’s usually involved in relationships of much madness, permissiveness and impulse, more focused on their con. He likes his children, but displays generosity.

⠀⠀⠀The Conservation E2 is more of a playing mother. She can live like her friend and it takes a lot for her to live as a grown mother. Give much but wait even more (recognition and love). Be distressed by how, as her children grow up, she loses importance.

⠀⠀⠀The Social E2 gives the appearance of being bigger, more mature. She maintains an image of almighty in front of her children so that they depend on her and need her presence more forcefully. She’s a mother who shines, who “gives herself to the world”.

SOCIAL TWO  ❛ 𝐆𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 ❜

✧    ㅤㅤ࣭ ㅤㅤׂ ㅤ ㅤˑㅤ  ㅤ۟ ㅤㅤ𓈒ㅤㅤׂㅤ

⠀⠀⠀The feeling of belonging to family, group or tribe is a core and conflicting aspect in all social subtypes. Social E2 is no exception. This ambitious man is an orphan seeking the necessary and legitimate place he was not allowed to occupy as a child. Faced with the difficulty of developing a positive, identifying bond with a secure father or mother figure, he crystallizes his fear and anger into animosity. In the absence of a figure to look up to and feel valued by, he will come to supplant her. Thus, the “son of none” will seek to be the “father of all”.

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 will be benevolent and generous as long as he does not feel challenged. But he is very thin-skin, and any sign that makes him think he doesn’t have absolute control over others will make him insecure and precipitate a crisis of authoritarianism, as well as a conquering and invasive reaction.

⠀⠀⠀With a strong sense of revenge, he will try, throughout his life, to conquer what he considers to be his rightful place as a leader at the top of society. His ambition is fed by a competitive and destructive spirit that he directs against the source of his feelings of inadequacy and self-hatred. He has swallowed the disappointment of an overbearing father or a dissatisfied mother, and today he spews this same frustration at others.

⠀⠀⠀When we allude to the word that gives name to this subtype, dominance, territorialism “empress” or “emperor”, we speak of authority, leadership and protection. And also of tyranny, abuse, absolutism and disproportion. Various aspects that draw, in short, a scene presided over by a marked vertical vision of social relations.

⠀⠀⠀Among the proud, the social subtype makes himself known by occupying space with his body, with his voice, with his gestures, and with a presence that conveys security and conviction. He is a histrionic simile, so he adds a serious countenance to his appearance, as of concern and commitment; the attitude of someone very mature, who knows what to do and what to do. At times he seems to have the gift of a seer, given his vehemence, and seems to be carrying a heavy load, albeit with a selfless posture. 

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 focuses on reproducing the role and bond he developed at home as a child with his family in the social relationships he establishes in the world. He wants everyone, not just his family or friends, to attach a personal importance to him that gives him the role of a reference person in their lives. 

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 took a place near her elders very early on, and from then on he was seen as someone important in family life, but not as a child. She does not have the experience of having been a child. Wearing heels too big for her, she was admired by her mother and father for what she did and not for what she was. Deprived, in turn, of the fraternal world, she does not know how to relate to her peers except in competition or above, and she will follow the game of triangulations that is established with the parental system, from early childhood, in the rest of her relationships, polarizing them into good and bad, or with me or against me.

⠀⠀⠀The confusion that has been made with roles in the family system permeates his relationships as an adult, which he contemplates from a hierarchical perspective. Social E2 stratifies people into spheres of influence and power, such that he cannot establish affective bonds, but rather strategic and practical ones. It ranks people based on how high they are on the organizational chart of the “institution”, real or imagined, in question. What in a company would be the president, CEO, etc. he applies to the group of friends, the social groups, or the family.

⠀⠀⠀He confuses a person’s status with his personal value; he neither sees the other nor sees himself. He confuses doing with being, and only what he can show gives him entity. He can be said to be the least empathic of the Two, with his high use of strategy and organization. The frontal and prefrontal lobe functions are most accessible to him: planning, problem solving, error control, decision making, social cognition, and working memory.

⠀⠀⠀The emperor throws his pride into the social convinced that he is far more qualified than the others to direct, plan or develop any project or activity that arises. The Social E2 needs, like all prides, recognition; specifically, that which comes from the groups. Paradoxically, inside there is an intense self-devaluation and a deep feeling of loneliness. He believes he has much to contribute and say, so he often fantasizes about the impact of his social participation and his place.

⠀⠀⠀He believes he has a lot to contribute and say, which is why he often fantasizes about the impact of his social participation and his place in the world, considering that he leaves others through his actions and opinions. He likes to think of himself as a very important and fundamental part of things. In his narcissism, he needs to feel at the center of the scene: he doesn’t care about not being ridiculous, the essential thing is not to be ignored. 

⠀⠀⠀He can be compared to E1 in that he seems to be in possession of the truth, and as someone very passionate and easily convinced by his certainty and conviction; when in reality he may not know more than superficially about the subject. His anger can be easily triggered if he is contradicted or his arguments or desires are questioned, and he seems to be counter-verbalanced, as he does not come into contact with fear, lack or insecurity. 

⠀⠀⠀So he has an image of himself, very close to reality, of a valid, competent, committed person with great capacity for work; but his difficulty with boundaries prevented him from knowing when to stop, and he is very demanding of himself; not even the illness can stop him, unless he ends up in the hospital. He needs someone with authority to impose and fully justify the need to take care of himself, because his crazy idea of over-abundance prevents him from accepting that he has reached his limit.

⠀⠀⠀At the same time, he believes himself fit for command, although it cyclically ends in failure, rarely acknowledged. Once again, his confusion of roles places him in an ambivalent manner in relation to his subordinates, whom he treats as equals, allying himself to the fraternal system. But when he has to exercise authority he has to position himself as a father, and nobody likes to be bossed around by a brother who acts like a father.

⠀⠀⠀He tries, in his false abundance, to satisfy everyone and, coupled with his inability to delegate certain matters and fulfill everything he promises, he is forced to leave or be expelled.

“When I held a position of authority in a water company, I put an emphasis on strong yet forgiving leadership, which took a lot of effort for me to be able to listen and try to make everyone on the team happy. I exhausted myself trying to reach consensus, promising more than I could deliver, giving the requests that came more value than I could sustain. She wanted to be the most loved “boss”, despite being in a power system where she had little room for freedom. At the same time, she wished to gain the esteem of those in the highest positions; and without marme. In short, I wanted to be loved by everyone, to please everyone, and instead I felt very alone”. — ALBA ARENA

⠀⠀⠀He gets involved and committed, showing himself to be very conscientious and efficient in all the projects he starts. However, it is very difficult for him to work in a team: he is a despot with the other and with himself.

⠀⠀⠀The self-indulgence so characteristic of the proud one manifests itself in Social E2 through behaviors that can work as anxiolytics, such as sex, food, media, or sports. They are his way of disconnecting from self-indulgence. 

“I demand so much of myself: to do many things, to do them well, to know and be in everything, to miss nothing ... and with such passion, when something doesn't turn out the way I’d like it to, instead of self-criticizing and analyzing why (those who charge a lot don’t squeeze a lot, how come I need to do so much ...) I become self-indulgent and tell myself there’s nothing wrong and pat myself on the back. It’s hard for me to see my mistakes, and before I admit that I might make them, I already give myself absolution”. — ANA GONZÁLEZ TEJERA

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 justifies this self-indulgence from a supposed privilege derived from how much everything he gives is worth. But it is also, we insist, where abandonment is allowed, as the only way to rest, to escape the control and demand of the inner father.

“If I have to get up for a meeting at five in the morning, I do it without question. On the other hand, if I have to get up at eight o’clock for any matter related to my personal care, I will find a thousand excuses to put it off”. — FRESIA NORA ROBLEDO POMA

⠀⠀⠀Another form of self-indulgence practiced by Social E2 is procrastination. It helps to avoid contact with what is not rewarding or painful. And also as a show of superiority, since he’s the one who decides when things get done. If the task is socially invisible, routine or trivial, he avoids it or passes it on to someone else. Other reasons for procrastinating are the fear of success, as well as the embarrassment of publicly showing failure, and even hearing that he’s not accomplishing everything he promised. In this sense, he’s usually a person who doesn’t handle time well, as he encompasses more than he can manage.

⠀⠀⠀Your difficulties with authority are another good reason to procrastinate, for example, if you have to answer to a superior you don’t recognize. You may delay completing a job by not being accountable to someone whose ability you question. Even when you validate authority, there may be delays in delivery because, in your mind, the assignment does not need revision because there is no room for error.

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 shows a high intolerance to frustration and generates helplessness so that your projects or ambitions do not prosper. If he fails, he feels anything from annoyed to furious, and will blame the other person or the situation for it, not being able to recognize his share of responsibility or the excess of the project. He can easily be ruthless with the people under his responsibility, even if he thinks he is an understanding, fair and loving boss.

“I was the coordinator of a team of seven people. The atmosphere and relationships with the rest were increasingly complicated, but I was convinced that the problem was the team and that I was misunderstood despite all the efforts I made for them. One day in a meeting, one of the educators, whom I considered lazy, was sharing an intervention that she had not done as I had instructed her. Suddenly I looked at her very angrily and said, raising my voice: “Next time I’m going to blow your head off”. I was so angry. Only when I looked away and saw the expressions on the faces of my companions, between horror and anger, did I have some awareness of what I had done, but of course I didn’t give it the slightest thought; I saw no excess or disproportionality”. — Ana Baza

⠀⠀⠀One of your abilities is, using your empathy, to adopt the appearance, gestures, and speech of the one you are trying to attract at every moment. You can abuse others by manipulating them to accomplish tasks that do not interest you. To do this, you surround yourself with the best and sell them on the idea, smear them with credentials and the various advantages they will gain. They believe it is a privilege to take on the task, and meanwhile, the Social E2 is building his network of collaborators who do this “thankless” work for him, and so he can devote himself to the more creative part, the organization, the social relationships, or imagining new projects.

⠀⠀⠀He usually works long hours and is so seriously involved that he tyrannizes and enslaves the other, without taking into account the care of personal relationships. He wants others to adhere to him as an undisputed leader, demanding absolute loyalty and dedication from his subordinates and collaborators, as well as a willingness to match his own. This usually results in a frenetic pace, which many people are unwilling or unable to afford. He is intolerant of the limitations of others, living as an uncomfortable obstacle, so he constantly tries to correct and improve the other. He tends to objectify the people with whom he collaborates, reducing the relationship to an uncomfortable procedure, which he is necessary with, in order to be able to use the other in the realization of his plans. He feels that others, family, partner, subordinates, etc. They are an extension of himself, so they have to appear as competent and brilliant as he is.

⠀⠀⠀He is very skilled at assessing the importance and capabilities of each person in a structure, whether in his social or work world, he pays no attention to those he perceives on the lower rungs of the pyramid unless he finds it useful to establish bonds of interest with them. For example, you may have a very good relationship with the secretarial or janitorial staff of a company.

⠀⠀⠀With the few that you recognize as authorities, you use a seductive strategy, and when you are recognized by them, you interpret it as a fair recognition, as something that is due to you for all that you do and how you solve it. It’s easy for him to visualize himself and present himself as the architect of the successes, even if it is a team effort. If this recognition does not occur, he trivializes it, justifying it as a sign of mediocrity or envy on the part of authority.

⠀⠀⠀And with his equals, since he has never been part of the fraternal subsystem, he establishes competitive relations from a self-designated superiority, condescending and paternalistic, which ends up leaving him very lonely.

⠀⠀⠀Deep down, and following his childhood pattern, E2 seeks to be close to authority, to the elders, which is his natural place of reference. However, although neurotically he seeks power and even replaces the leader, reality tells him that this is not what calms his ambition. What he really wants is to find a family where he is recognized through unconditional love and acceptance. Ultimately, this domineering, counter-dependent character is looking for someone to finally protect and care for him. 

⠀⠀⠀He even shows no scruples in achieving what he aspires to, and to this end establishes complicit relationships, including bribery, blackmail, mutual aid out of interest, or temporary alliances. Of course, this, barring criminal maneuvers, can be seen as logical and reasonable in an attempt to satisfy one’s own desires, but in Social E2 the motivation will be selfish and devoid of any compassionate or caring nuance, even though he believes it’s for the common good. The ambitious one owes and serves only himself. His generosity is part of his seductive and interesting facade. And he ends up receiving much more than he gave. Besides the fact that debts with him are hardly ever canceled, and that he charges a lot for the “favors” he may have lavished on them at the time.

⠀⠀⠀Being a creditor puts the Social E2 in a privileged place to have influence over the other and use him for his plans. And he is extremely interested in maintaining this debt for two reasons. The first, because it thereby demonstrates that he does not need what he is owed, which reinforces his false superabundance. The second, because it is an element of control and dominance. 

“When I forgive someone, I do it from above, as if I were a pope giving absolution. I do it because I don’t like to be excused; an explanation is enough to calm the anguish of not knowing where the mistake is. One day, an old friend approached me to apologize for a past problem; I did not let her apologize for everything. Then I realized that this way I could hold her in debt forever”. — ANA BAZA

⠀⠀⠀An ambitious person has an exquisite sensitivity for herself. It is not enough that she has been recognized on receipt when someone does not value her in the highest regard at that moment by the other; she requires continuous confirmation of her excellence or superiority. Naturally, this is a layer of varnish to cover her deep insecurity and sense of neediness. 

⠀⠀⠀The endless expansion of power, influence, and ability to which she devotes herself body and soul can be seen as an attempt to free herself from those shackles that angrily threaten to suffocate her until they disappear.

⠀⠀⠀The feeling of being small, smaller than the other, infinitely smaller, of being the weak one, the dependent one, the needy one, causes an anticipatory anguish to paralyze her facing only two possibilities: either she is on top, and that gives her security, or she is down, and that leads to being subjugated, to being abused, and finally to disappear. The Social Two chooses very early on to survive, and in order to do so, it needs to adopt an “oops” position in everything that concerns it.

⠀⠀⠀It cannot receive; it does not know. Above all, a gift. If he receives something, he thinks it is in payment for a favor he has done, or that something will be asked of him. And if he hasn’t done anything before, he will suspect or think that it is a payment for the benefits the other gets from his friendship. This character keeps a very detailed accounting of favors, payments, collections and debts, in a notebook where he writes down the “good deeds”, even those that were not asked for. 

⠀⠀⠀Feeling in need is a Social E2 synonymous with weakness, with danger. Being small terrifies him because he has never been loved as a boy, as a girl, nor has he been recognized in his weakness or vulnerability except to be used and abused.

⠀⠀⠀Being a debtor is something intolerable, which undermines the self-perception of being above bonds or duties to another. It is synonymous with slavery. And if there is one thing he loves, it is to believe that he is free and without limits. He is suspicious of and outright rejects anyone he may perceive in any respect, be it emotional, sexual, work or spiritual, as referent or superior. He carries the trauma of having felt mistreated by his elders all his life, to the point of fearing, for various reasons, very seriously for his life.

“For the emperor, the empress, to ask is the public and explicit recognition of their incapacity, and to be helped is humiliating. And to be one without having asked, which is very unlikely, is already an insult. When he is discouraged, defeated, depressed or absent, he takes refuge in his home and gives no sign of what is happening to him until he pulls himself together and returns to the stage. I was on the couch in my house with a pretty serious depression; only my immediate family knew about it. He didn't go out or talk to anyone. Who would he call? I didn't think anyone would have a clue how to help me.” — ANA BAZA

⠀⠀⠀She harbors the irrational thought that if she puts herself in someone else's hands, she will be betrayed and may perish emotionally. It is a mistrust that originates in the relationship with the mother and that generalizes to life; hence her skepticism in receiving without giving anything in return and her attitude of constant arrogance in the face of her own vulnerability or limitations. To maintain this autarky, one starts from the premise that he doesn't need anyone. Two socials are experts at putting others down if they are not useful for them to achieve their goals. In this way, he gets few people to approach him, which confirms his self-sufficiency, but also his orphanhood. Paradoxically, when there is a problem, they tend to turn to him, which narcissistically compensates their feeling of loneliness.

2. THE NEUROTIC NEED

⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝

⠀⠀⠀To be a reference person, in what it considers its territory, is the desire that makes the E2 Social vibrate. To achieve this, he has developed a strategic mind, the ability to influence, and an opportunistic and always alert intelligence. But he also needed to banish some characteristics of any human being such as compassion, tenderness, to allow himself to make mistakes, or, what this subtype fears the most: love, which baffles him and, at the same time, is the only thing that can cure him. One could say that Social E2 buried, or rather, banished his heart, his childhood and his humanity after being commissioned to become an adult in early childhood. 

⠀⠀⠀One can say that the social subtype is the proudest among the proud. It does not fantasize about regaining the warmth of its father or mother, although from them it has learned to feel like “the chosen one”; nor is it content to captivate a few men or women. Social E2 aspires to conquer territories, groups, and the whole world if it gets lost. Cleopatra, Napoleon, Eva Peron, Alexander the Great or Lucifer are examples of this charismatic, trickster and crowd-seducer subtype. Says Karen Horney, defining such expansive characters: “It’s dedicated to self-glorification, proud endeavors, vengeful triumphs, and domination of life through intelligence and willpower as a means of bringing success. Practice your idealized self.”

⠀⠀⠀Social boy E2 felt worthy of being watched with love. However, when he was no longer useful to his mother or father, or inconvenient for any reason, he was pushed away with gestures and body language full of contempt, which made him feel humiliated. It is from this downward movement that the pride and ambition to regain the lost dignity through recognition and to become again, and in all scenarios, that reference person who was loved “unconditionally” is born.

“I remember that flattery, feeling different and being the chosen one lived with contempt and humiliation. I had to do my best to remain the chosen one and maintain my position in the family. The word “pride” literally came up to forget the humiliations and overcome that, drawing strength from weakness to win my parents over again. It’s as if humiliation threw me into a pit from which I come out giving everything, thanks to pride”. — ROSA USELETI

⠀⠀⠀Claudio Naranjo defines social as the most intellectual of the Two. Although, like the other subtypes, he uses emotionalization as his main defense, in his case he represses his emotions and can be more disciplined because he puts the strategic ambition of conquest in the foreground. Only an illness or a major failure at work level would put him in touch with his physical limits and a “slight” feeling of vulnerability.

⠀⠀⠀This unbridled action, this passion for purpose disguises itself as ambition and focuses on the achievement of goals, territories or groups; all as part of the desperate search for a place in the world to repay what was not given to him in his own right in his family and to escape the cold emptiness he would come into contact with if he stopped. Social E2 was not seen for who he was, but rather for his usefulness in supporting and satisfying one or both parents. 

⠀⠀⠀He has played the role of confidant, knowledgeable about information that is not appropriate to his evolutionary moment. He has already played the role of partner to one of his two parents, according to gender, starting to compete early with his father. In the case of women, in adolescence they face head-on the one who could have been their idol, to usurp their role as “father” of the family. 

⠀⠀⠀It has been the unconditional support of his mother. She was the one that one of her parents wanted to shine for, the one who was going to save the family, and it is common that she has been used as a tool for attack and blackmail among the adults. However, there is one role he could not play: that of being a boy, a girl. This experience is what brings him closer to and shares him with E3 and E8, the two powerful enneatypes of the triad of action, in the personality enneagram. There was no childhood beyond the age of seven or eight.

⠀⠀⠀In the absence of boundaries, protection, or emotional support from one or both parents, they survive by growing up prematurely to occupy a place of importance and reference within the parenting system. They are usually isolated from the fraternal subsystem, as they are somehow denied or renounced relationships with their peers. The absence of a place of his own, the mandate of self-sufficiency, and a sticky feeling of loneliness will accompany him throughout his life and drive him to chase glory.

⠀⠀⠀What distresses Social E2 the most is the contact, on the few times he is allowed, with the underlying states of disability and depression. The idea that if he falls he might die accompanies him recurrently in his nightmares. This worry stems from the fact that he was not protected or supported in his emotional falls as a child; and it stayed with him the feeling that he might perish without anyone remembering or caring for him. In adulthood, he will be suspicious if anyone cares for him, and, driven to the extreme, he will succumb rather than ask for help. To avoid contact with this helplessness and calm his anguish, he put his body and head in the service of strategy and action, banishing his restless heart, which is as inconvenient as having to attend to his most basic needs, in love without profit.

◯   ◦ The image of the ambitious

⠀⠀⠀The ambitious can be seen arriving; he is braggadocious although he doesn’t speak. When he does, he can be heard raising his tone of voice, while gesticulating, entertaining the different people he always has around him. He smiles a lot, and although he laughs little, he can be heard from afar.

⠀⠀⠀When she walks down the street it is easy for them to make way for her strong, natural and graceful gait at the same time. He has an arrogant presence, like someone who knows he owns the land he steps on and gives the image, like a peacock, of being someone who is “important, regardless of the context in which it takes place.”

⠀⠀⠀Oscar Wilde is a good example of this subtype, a modern man, in the style of the Renaissance man in his curious and bucolic openness, and somewhat baroque in his expression. Contemporary with his time, he likes art and beauty in any of its forms. A well-connected intellectual surrounded by influential people of his time. Funny, perceptive, witty, and with a wide network of contacts, he is usually well informed and takes care of his personal appearance, which he easily adapts according to his purposes. 

⠀⠀⠀As chameleonic as E3, however, E2 Social uses his appearance more as a tool to achieve his goals than as part of an image. He takes advantage of his strategic adaptability and empathy to identify the defining signs of the different groups with whom he interacts. He subtly transforms his appearance, but without losing his identity or desire to stand out, and integrates himself into the group he is interested in, managing to be seen and admired for the value he adds to the group by his mere presence. 

⠀⠀⠀He’s an opportunist who knows how to drink from different sources and make an idea or project his own. He is not content to copy what others have: he takes what he needs and combines it with other elements, in a creative way, which gives an innovative result. He is an expert at patchwork from the different stimuli he receives and, at the same time, giving a kind of light that makes any company seem possible. 

⠀⠀⠀Like Napoleon, the last great conqueror. Only a “reckless” like him, a narcissist driven mad by his compulsive desire for “more and more”, could conquer almost impossible territories: eleven countries, including half of Russia, and at a time when the media was not the proper for such an enterprise. Social E2 are people who, despite being considered a fraud internally, rely on a high self-confidence, compulsively seeking any opportunity to conquer the masses, like Elvis Presley, Truman Capote or Eva Perón, a magnificent example of how a Social E2 knows how to sublimate his ambition: Everything for the people.

◯   ◦ The Great Ambitious. The Conquest

⠀⠀⠀Cleopatra, Julius Caesar, Napoleon or Alexander the Great have something in common: being great conquerors of masses, of territories. Creators of empires, their legacy survived them, despite the remoteness of the time in which they lived.

⠀⠀⠀In all their biographies we can see points in common, as well as aspects of character that make them share a subtype:

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 believes he can do what he undertakes better than anyone else. He does not admit orders, and even less in those matters that he believes belong to it. Thus, he is able to stand up against established power, arguing that it is for the common good. Both Napoleon and Julius Caesar proclaimed themselves emperors thinking that only they knew what the people needed, but they ended up assuming absolute power, despite having fought precisely against it when another held it. Something reminiscent of usurping one's father's place in childhood. 

⠀⠀⠀When a rule is inconvenient or an obstacle to achieving his goals, the Social E2 ignores it or adjusts it to his needs, even creating new ones with the desire that they be universal. He does not value doing something incorrect, but necessary, because the end justifies the means. He naturally applies the saying that the road to hell is paved with good intentions, for he knows how to justify any act in the pursuit of a common good goal.

⠀⠀⠀A great ambitious person always wants to change the world and make it a better place for the underdog: “I’m willing to resort to anything, to submit to anything, for the good of all people”. — JULIO CESAR

“I didn’t want or want anything for myself. My glory is and always will be the coat of arms of Perón and the flag of my people, and although I have left traces of my life along the way, I know that you will take my name and carry it as the flag of victory. [...] If this city asked me for my life, I would give it to them singing, because the happiness of a single shirtless man is worth more than my entire life”. — EVITA

“I have a heart, but a sovereign's heart; I do not pity the tears of a duchess, but I’m affected by the ills of the people”. — NAPOLÉON

⠀⠀⠀He’s certain that he is capable of accomplishing everything he sets his mind to in life and plans great undertakings for himself and the world. This confidence in his personal resources and his ability to envision gives him the conviction that he knows how to convey his passion when he believes in something. He takes risks and is an innovator in his field, be it music, literature, or war. On the other hand, he is a great strategist and has the discipline and tenacity to achieve the impossible, as he undertakes actions that others can't even imagine. 

⠀⠀⠀He resorts to whatever it takes to achieve what he aspires to; he doesn’t care about the price to pay or the consequences to himself or others. He has big plans for himself and knows how to take any opportunity to create something new or to bounce back from possible failure. However, he is a conqueror and needs the group to find support and for his company to be socially recognized. 

⠀⠀⠀When he wants to win, he is ruthless. But when he succeeds, he is magnanimous. Like Julius Caesar, with the beliefs and customs of the invaded peoples. It is a sign of tolerance, and also a strategy of control over the conquered. The Social E2 needs to have everything under control, to the point of becoming a tyrant capable of turning the group against him. 

⠀⠀⠀Conquest gives him the adrenaline he needs to feel alive. He is addicted to the excitement of the power, influence, and status they carry. What he can't do is stay to keep what he has conquered, because it would involve protecting, caring, or getting into a routine that doesn’t last long. Social E2 needs to go hook one conquest after another and leave the care of what has been conquered to others. 

⠀⠀⠀He is insatiable; rarely or only for a short time is he satisfied with what has been achieved. His ambition drives him relentlessly to keep chasing the impossible. His inability to see and accept the limits, his own and those of others, leads him to irremediable failure. Just like Julius Caesar or Napoleon, he intends to go so far that his own excess of wanting to be God leads him, in the same fall as Lucifer, to failure.

◯   ◦ Recovering lost dignity

⠀⠀⠀The word that best defines the neurotic need of the Social E2 is, therefore, ambition. Etymologically, it is interesting to follow the trail of other related words that could explain the genesis of this subtype: dignity and humiliation.

⠀⠀⠀The word ‘ambition’ contains two meanings. In both, one observes the desire to achieve something with vehemence; which puts us directly in touch with the intensity and proactivity of this character and his vital “going for it” movement, as Claudio Naranjo points out, following Karen Horney: The so-called E2 is a surprisingly expansive example, that is, let’s say, that approaches conflicting situations through pleasure and power and giving up [...] and we would say that the social subtype is the most antagonistic.

⠀⠀⠀Sticking with this term, the ambition of E2 Social is not prioritized by wealth or image, as in E3 Social, but more specifically the passion to “be more, be more, do more”. This drive for “the most” gives him back a sense of meaning in life. If he were to stop his achievement, he would have to come into contact with his lack: an absence of himself, an emptiness he cannot bear. And he would also lose hope of being loved and valued. To be one among many would be like not existing, not having a place in the world. 

⠀⠀⠀It’s the passion, specifically, of being someone important to turn to, a reference. If we look more closely, what he really wants is to have dignity, to be worthy of being loved, to be worthy of love. However, he does not direct this search toward the authentic value that dignity holds deep within the human being, but diverts it, believing that it resides in being confirmed by the world, thanks to his great deeds. Following this thread we come across two of the meanings of the word ‘humiliate’ ‘to hurt someone’s self-esteem or dignity and to go through a situation where the person suffers some harm’. This is the experience that will give rise to the formation of this character. 

⠀⠀⠀When a human being is born, he knows that he is complete and with full capacity to love and be loved. The environment of Social E2 reassures the child that he is worthy of being looked at with love, because it considers him a special being, conveys to him that he is going to do something important; which in turn keeps his self-concept and self-esteem high. 

⠀⠀⠀However, something interrupts this nirvana; the mother, especially, is “absent” or looks away somehow. Perhaps only because, upon ceasing to be a child, that unconditional gaze is no longer, but what the Social E2 experiences is that a perverse game begins, where he is the custodian of high expectations and responsibilities beyond his evolving possibilities. This gives him overwhelming confidence in his possibilities, but at the same time de-energizes you and cyclically leads you into states of stress or depression. In exchange, he receives something he will never stop fighting for: a place of power within the system.

⠀⠀⠀In parallel, another family dynamic feeds the child’s uncertainty about what his place really is, which will motivate him in the future to gain one in his own right within the groups. From this place of reference and parity granted to him, he feels, by being treated again as the child he is, the humiliation of having been “degraded”, deceived, betrayed. This expulsion from the place of importance, this ambivalence about where he is placed by the significant adults, is experienced as the primordial humiliation.

⠀⠀⠀When the girl approaches her mother in those high heels, proud and self-confident, the mother, who doesn't need her at that moment, dismissively pushes her away as if she were more than just someone untoward. These are the first experiences with shame, humiliation, and feelings of fraud.

⠀⠀⠀Coming into contact with his inadequacy, the future Social 2 child neutralizes this by raising his chin and personal goals to show that he is self-sufficient and skilled in whatever he undertakes. As an adult, he will aspire to rediscover this “primary unconditional” love in the groups he tries to conquer, confusing territory and love. 

⠀⠀⠀Paradoxically, when love strikes him, Social E2 is suspicious and unable to surrender or show what he considers a weakness: his vulnerability and need for the other. When he considers that he is not loved or that this love is not proportional to what he expects, he feels betrayed and cuts the person, the authority or the whole group off; you may also leave without clarifying or asking what happened.

◯   ◦ The Ambitious Way Out

⠀⠀⠀Like all narcissists, the Social E2 carefully and secretly hides, if he is aware of it, his shortcomings, his failures and, above all, the emptiness that accompanies him. Thus he ends up in a circular movement between success and failure, between anxiety and depression. As will be reported in the chapter on childhood, Social E2 was able to suffer depressions of the anaclitic type as a child and introjective type as an adult.

“The dreaded scene is that they'll abandon me, that I'm not worth it... that I can’t solve other people’s lives. I sell myself inflated; I create expectations that then weigh me down because I feel there isn't much in me. It hurts to see how I despise what I have, how I devalue myself by not always being thoughtful and witty. I see the colorful cellophane I created; it's worn out, like an old plastic bottle; underneath you can barely see something small and square: it’s a bar of soap.” — ANA BAZA

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 lives with the permanent tension of the distance between his narcissistic aspirations and reality. It’s also about someone with low frustration tolerance, which causes a collapse in his sense of omnipotence. Faced with this imbalance, there are two possible outcomes: either anger against the other or as self-aggression, both based, as Kohut says, on experiences of humiliation or depression. 

⠀⠀⠀According to Blatt, narcissists subject themselves to constant scrutiny and exhibit such a permanent fear of criticism that their depression in adulthood will be introjective: feelings of worthlessness, inferiority, failure, and shame, mixed with harsh self-criticism. These are, and this is the most significant, depressions that are difficult to detect, because in their speech it is difficult to notice that they feel so defeated. It is common for them to be unaware that they have experienced depressive episodes or to isolate themselves until they recover. 

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 is disconnected from his needs and self-care because he associates contact with his inner child with being humiliated and not being held by anyone. 

“I felt a lot of sadness, although I never conceived of “depression”. Among other things, because I did not allow myself to feel the pain and sadness until well into my personal process. I could feel the sadness and would immediately transform it by getting angry or withdrawn, disconnecting in some way.” — MONICA ANGULO

⠀⠀⠀One of the axes of narcissism is the high severity of critical consciousness. And one of the engines of this ambitious man is precisely a severe and persecuting inner father, who torments him by whispering that he is not enough, that he can achieve more goals, with more commitments. This voice comes from a constant search for recognition to which he has been accustomed since childhood.

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 received an inconsistent message as a child, which kept him on anxious alert because he could be praised or scolded for the same behavior or attitude.

Horney states, in this regard:

⠀⠀⠀Blind worship can increase your sense of importance. You may feel loved and appreciated not for who you are, but only to satisfy your parents’ need for adoration, prestige, or power.

⠀⠀⠀And a rigid regimen of perfectionist principles may awaken in him a feeling of inferiority, for not living up to such demands. Tricks and poor grades at school may be severely reprimanded, while good behavior or good grades are taken for granted.

⠀⠀⠀Another contradiction to which he has been subjected, and that adds social content to the experiences of humiliation, is that, in his inner self, the mother shows her disappointment if her son doesn’t live up to the high ideals that have been generated about him. This is a fundamental aspect in the formation of narcissistic character.  On the other hand, when there are “witnesses”, both at home and on the street, the message is one of disproportionate praise and blind confidence in his possibilities, to the point of feeling ashamed of how he is bragged about or shown off: the humiliation becomes public. 

“I felt that I was displayed as an object, a product of my parents. I think this is why it is so easy for me to “prostitute” myself into seduction and, in fact, remember my parents imitating what they did to me. Always in search of their lost love. I say “prostitution” as a disloyalty to myself, as a dishonesty. I ally myself with whoever as long as they admire me, and if I feel the aggression, I invalidate my feelings and put myself as a punching bag, because as neither I feel nor suffer.” — MARIO MEDALION SERRANO

⠀⠀⠀In adulthood, Social E2 will pay a high price for this familiar pattern, distrusting anyone who speaks well of him. Interestingly, although what he wants most is public recognition, he’s easy to sustain it because he interprets that there is something unreal or false about it, just like when he was a child. Added to this is the fear of being discovered as a fraud, or of not meeting the expectations that may be created around him. This is one of the pillars of his difficulty with intimate relationships and the poor quality of the bonds he establishes.

⠀⠀⠀The term ‘recognition’, so common in the spectrum of Social E2, has an ambivalent, though not exclusive, meaning. On the one hand, it implies gratitude and thanks, and this is related to an act of arrogance, in which he thinks he deserves special consideration, in payment for the debt he incurred with him as a child.

⠀⠀⠀On the other hand, ‘to acknowledge’ also means ‘to admit someone as legitimate’, which is connected to his fear of being seen as a fraud and that by stripping him of his territory he will feel the original humiliation again. Social E2 works tirelessly to keep the ‘promises’ that will keep him in that place or status. However, both his own expectations and those he has generated in others are so high that he often fears, internally and secretly, that they will find out that he really can’t.

⠀⠀⠀In reality, he is tired of maintaining the image he has built of himself and simply needs to be recognized as legitimate, showing himself fully with his flaws, his limits, his vulnerability, and his fears, just like anyone else.

3. INTERPERSONAL STRATEGY AND

ASSOCIATED IRRATIONAL IDEAS

⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝

⠀⠀⠀Attachment represents the central cognitive distortion of character. It is a coherent interpretation of reality, which the child constructs throughout his or her childhood into adulthood, adapting to family mandates and social messages, and which becomes an “objective” truth that feeds the infatuation. Thus, a vicious circle is created, where convictions and perceptions of reality reinforce behavioral strategies consistent with these interpretations, so that one falls more and more in love with this way of being, losing sight of the context.

◯   ◦ The false Abundance of the Social E2

⠀⠀⠀The false abundance is the cognitive fixation of Two. It is the distorted belief that one has more than the others, that there is more than enough, when in fact they have the same as the others.

⠀⠀⠀The proud suppress their needs to believe that they don’t need it. The abandonment they have suffered is not conscious and conditions their way of acting. He shows himself to be abundant precisely because he feels, internally, less. It is a condition mirroring E4s, with the difference that E2 finds an outlet in the repression of lack and identifies with an ideal and grandiose image of himself.

⠀⠀⠀The false abundance of the ambitious has, of course, its eyes set on the social. This is a narcissistic response, where he needs to be seen as he sees himself ideally. This idealization disassociates him from his deep sense of really being a fraud, and he reactively interprets all his actions and behavior within the framework of a large company and a kind attitude toward others. He looks for appearances in which he thinks he will be seen as he wants to be recognized, avoiding failure and emptiness, and entering the vicious circle of character.

◯   ◦ The Vision of Himself

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 sees himself as someone who, in the future, will achieve his goals, for which the people close to him will praise his qualities. He projects onto the other the look that confirms his ideal image, because the internal look is insufficient.

⠀⠀⠀And he constantly lies to himself, fantasizing about actions that will put him in the place he thinks he deserves. Ultimately, his belief is that he is superior to others, that sooner or later they will have to recognize him. The narcissistic layer is an overcompensatory reaction of his egoic shadow, in which he devalues himself. In other words, he needs to fantasize that he has superior abilities because deep down he doesn’t value the ones he already has, because he doesn't see or recognize them.

⠀⠀⠀The irrational, or crazy, ideas that Social E2 has about himself touch on the themes of greatness, omnipotence, being a messiah, and also the fallacy that his love has a different quality. He believes that he possesses a universal love that sets him apart from the rest of the world and that he can make everything change. He feels deeply lonely, although he seems to be in contact with all kinds of people all the time and seems to be available, attentive and friendly. He isolates himself because he has difficulty tolerating the faults he sees in others, and because he is frustrated that his idealized image is not recognized. Both this isolation and the extreme emotionality of his feelings are his defenses in case physical, psychological or affective experiences, such as illness or sentimental or work failures, can put him in touch with his limits and “flaws”. It is his way of escaping from depression.

⠀⠀⠀Moreover, he’s a person who works hard because his will is not enough for him to achieve the goals he constantly pursues, so he becomes a workaholic, in a relentless effort to be recognized.

◯   ◦ The Vision of the Other

⠀⠀⠀The Social E2 sees others as means to achieve his purposes. Some purposes that are usually strategic: have friends to feel supported; have a partner to have sex with; have good contacts to raise; have a good relationship with others to avoid conflicts. There is very little room for the other, because his ambition makes him lose sight of the fact that he is a person. In fact, Social E2, even though he claims to have many friends, is abandoned by them, especially when he feels he has nothing to gain.

⠀⠀⠀In groups, the ambitious one is an excellent attention getter. With his emotional speech, you hardly ever get bored; he knows where to place the accent to keep the external gaze. This, in casual encounters, is a great way to captivate; but in the medium term it is inconvenient, because it seems that he always has to put the cherry on top of the cake and you end up seeing him as a pest and a cheater.

⠀⠀⠀The Social Two’s nose for what the bond is like helps him to give the other what he needs so that the relationship does not create difficulties. However, because of his own anesthesia, it is difficult for him to care for this hyper-demanding person with a connection in a connected way. In fact, he shows himself to the other, and not only has difficulty admiring a verb he confuses with envy, but thinks the other is slow, incapable, clumsy, or obtuse.

⠀⠀⠀In their relationships, they care in a superficial way and subtly despise the other in order to gradually leave him or her in an inferior position in which they feel superior, secretly dominating.

◯   ◦ The World View

⠀⠀⠀Regarding the world, Social E2 is apparently generous, adopting a way of behaving to last. Basically it is like a quest for immortality through good deeds that resonate with society.

⠀⠀⠀For the ambitious person, the world is a great ladder to climb, a great terrain to conquer. He considers that there are always more groups to reach and make themselves known, and he loves to feel part of them, as long as he can occupy a prominent place in them. If she doesn’t occupy a leading position, she thinks she could do better than her own boss, devaluing him, although she doesn't assume his responsibilities. She prefers the position to the right of the boss, a place where she can be recognized and confirmed. However, when contrasted with her own abilities in cipa groups, or when she is put in her rightful place, she feels this as an offense and a humiliation, and so tries to run away. When personal charm and trickery give way to real knowledge of her true abilities, she feels like a fraud and becomes ashamed.

⠀⠀⠀The ambitious person thinks that the world is a place where love must triumph. She often has a naive and messianic vision, thinking that the pain of the world would cease if everyone loved as she considers she loves. This is a great difficulty, which stems from the dissociation from his own shadow, which he does not want to look at. What is said to silence the shadow is that one day it will reach the final, capital recognition, where all its efforts will be rewarded. Moreover, to silence his own dissatisfaction and sense of emptiness, he believes in the strength of his bonds in a way that is disproportionate to his strength and the care he has devoted to them.

◯   ◦ Neurotic Mechanisms

⠀⠀⠀Emotionalization is the typical defense mechanism of E2, whereby he “creates” an emotion or exaggerates it to the point of dramatization. (The E2 is related to histrionic personality disorder, although the social subtype is more associated with narcissistic disorder). The goal is to defend yourself from the real emotion you are feeling, such as pain, fear, or frustration.

⠀⠀⠀In addition, you tend to prioritize the seemingly pleasant emotions, such as happiness or excitement. That is, instead of giving vent to the emotion that needs to be expressed, it transmutes it into a seemingly pleasant feeling, forgetting what it really needs to express, thanks to the interpretation in the light of false abundance: Feeling so full of pleasurable, beautiful, joyful and vital emotions, it infers that it has special qualities. Then he feels like the Sun King, radiating happiness everywhere.

⠀⠀⠀This reinforces his forgetfulness of himself and his own ignorance of what is happening to him and how to express it. For E2, faced with the importance of understanding what he is experiencing, there is the egoic need for the other to validate his own behavior, because he himself is not sure that what he feels is true, since it amplifies or alters the primordial emotional quality.

⠀⠀⠀This is the basis of his dependence on the other's gaze, typical of emotional characters: he needs the other to endorse the lie in which he lives, because it cannot be sustained, since it is based on a scant understanding of what he feels internally.

⠀⠀⠀What happens to E2 is obviously the same as what happens to other people. However, his poor global vision and his egocentric self-absorption lead him to consider what he experiences as more relevant and significantly different from what happens to the rest of the people. The recapitulation that would be necessary to overcome a problem through proper judgment frustrates him by emotionalizing his thoughts and making them less accurate. By no longer feeling like one, he excludes himself, and there, faced with this lack of a sense of parity with the other, the Social E2 feels alone and deeply empty; a fraud.

⠀⠀⠀One of the most important ideas that this shameless man equips himself with is greatness.

◯   ◦ The Greatness

⠀⠀⠀Greatness refers to a basic cognitive error, which is to consider that big beats small, defeats small, or is better. The idea, then, is not to be based on what you have and what happens to you, but to see it in proportion to others. Greatness somehow becomes the idea that “one must be more than the other to be included”, because internally he only accepts what he considers truly superior. There is no place then for what is not great. Everything that is not Social E2 separates him and moves him into the shadows; this is why he is proud of those who unconsciously remind him of all those things about him that he hides from himself.

⠀⠀⠀This narcissistic response involves assembling a grandiose shell so that it is not perceived that, inside, he harbors the feeling of cida. These perceptions erupt from time to time in the state of not living up to it, which would jeopardize the larger emotional self-image, sometimes by receiving criticism, and arrive at a cyclical behavior that combines euphoric and semi-depressive conforming states.

⠀⠀⠀This idea of grandeur also speaks to their social conceptions. The ambitious see their ecosystem as stratified; everyone belongs to a social scale, and “since big beats small, it is better to be on the higher rungs of the social scale”. This irrational idea is obviously manufactured in childhood. There is a certain tendency to relate to older people in the little big ones. Already in adulthood, “the elders” are not the eldest, but those who occupy a prominent place in the social scale; in short, authority. 

⠀⠀⠀With this idea of greatness, it is difficult to have what Claudio Naranjo calls admiring love, which corresponds to the way I relate to what is greater than me, such as the idea of the divine, the authorities, or even the other that I consider valuable. Social E2 has great difficulty with admiration, which he experiences in two very different ways. One is to exaggerate the capabilities of the other, responding to his own ideal self. That is, he sees in the other the capabilities that he himself fantasizes he has or can have. And the other, darker form of admiration is repressed envy. You want what belongs to others, but without being noticed. And so you are not able to really admire the other, because you relate to him in an ambivalent way, showing haughtiness towards the one you admire.

⠀⠀⠀This subtype has a vertical concept of the social, where there is one above and one below. And the ambitious one wants to be at the top, and considers himself to be below where he thinks he belongs. This is precisely his driving force to reach a place that, in reality, he cannot embody, although it represents his ideal of himself. For this, overwork is very important. It’s very difficult to get a place according to your abilities, if not by lying about them, by being so self-demanding that it can lead to self-slavery.

⠀⠀⠀This excessive effort ends in the overvaluation of a territorial status as a function of greatness, which comes, as we have said, from some parents or reference figures who stimulated the idea that there was something great about this child; certainly due to a paternal or maternal admiration derived from their own unsatisfied pretensions.

Since I was a child I was good at studying, I liked to learn. I had a passion for medicine: I liked series about doctors, documentaries about doctors. I watched live operations and always said I wanted to be a doctor. My parents supported him at all times and started telling me that I would be a great doctor, that I would discover the remedy for cancer. I was proud to hear them; they bragged about their daughter everywhere. She was always the girl who would be a doctor and discover the cure for cancer. The years went by and the whole family knew I was going to be an oncologist and when COU came and I had to decide on careers, I didn't put medicine anywhere, not even as a last option. I felt so much pressure from family expectations that I didn’t dare and chose a completely different career.” — ROSA USELETI

⠀⠀⠀What is the price you pay for greatness? By living in parameters that don’t belong to you. He’s ahead of his age, so what he has to live ignores; he already wants to be in the next one. And once an adult, he keeps asking for more: he must be at a certain point, he must be more aware, more complete... In short, more.

Some crazy ideas about greatness:

• “I’m the most important, you can’t do without me.”

• “The others, always behind me.”

• “I’m better than everyone else.”

• “I’m a reference at home and everyone’s happiness depends on me.”

• “Only I can support my parents.”

• “I’m the prettiest daughter, the most intellectual, the nicest. I am everything else.”

• “I see the world as my subjects.”

• “I’ve done so much, I’m so fast and efficient that others don’t follow my pace; it’s better for me to think and for them to do what I tell them to do.”

• “The others are on a different level than me.”

• “I’m the most special.”

• “If I’m not great I’m not valid.”

• “If I’m not great I disappear, they don’t see me, they don't love me, I’m not worth it.”

• “One day my greatness will be known and there they will praise me.”

• “My thirst for greatness is necessary to fulfill my mission.”

◯   ◦ Omnipotence

⠀⠀⠀Omnipotence is a belief, which underpins the almost manic behavior of the Social E2, that he can do anything. It resembles the ideal of the Social E3 in the sense that, in this competitive society, a person can make himself and work his way up to his full potential, regardless of external obstacles, his own limits, or the prices that necessarily have to be paid, both his own and others’. The difference between Two and Three lies in the fact that the former considers that he already possesses all his manifest abilities, and that the other simply has to acknowledge them, while the latter knows that he has to “work hard to achieve an achievement and lean more on himself” strategically on the abilities and strengths of those who accompany him.

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 considers that because he has felt at some point that he is intelligent, he really is. He has the gift of omnipresence. He overestimates himself: he adds or multiplies, as far as himself is concerned. Believing himself omnipotent is one of the crazy ideas that hurts you the most. He has a strong attachment to work, with which he gets the resources he needs to feel abundant and superior. It is a measuring stick. Being self-demanding in performance gives you certain benefits and helps you believe that you are omnipotent. It is the self-slavery of the ambitious.

⠀⠀⠀Omnipotence finds its maximum satisfaction in planning actions to conquer, be it people, status or territories. The moment he imagines reaching the goal, it’s as if he already has it in his hands: “If I want it and think about it, I already have it” (let's not forget that this subtype is, of the three, the most intellectual). Often the achievement doesn't require much concrete work either, because the social E2 is skilled at appropriating the achievements of others, whom he has certainly already convinced of how much he is helping them or how indispensable he is, with his incredible skills.

⠀⠀⠀In the latter case, he shows all his false generosity in how helpful and helpful he can be, or how he can save you by getting you out of so much trouble: “I’ll do it, I’ll fix it, don’t worry about it. And on top of that, he makes you feel dependent and indebted, that is, his subject. It is very common to see how the social Two, in relationships, manages to make the other remain at a level of dependence that is even childish, hooked on the idealization of an authority that is so powerful and loving at the same time.

⠀⠀⠀All Twos have a radar with which they detect better than anyone else what the other's needs are. It can have the opposite effect on some occasions. And it is that when the ambitious one realizes that he doesn't meet the excessive demands he makes of himself, he goes into his depressive side, even despising the capabilities he possesses. One way or another, avoid getting in touch with what you are.

⠀⠀⠀His is an attempt to stand out and be recognized, whatever it is, above or below; the important thing is not to be indifferent. As in E4, there is a difficulty in being in the middle ground, in the lukewarm. Social E2 flees from mediocrity, and if he cannot achieve omnipotent excellence, he prefers to go to the exaggeration of everything in which he is deficient. 

⠀⠀⠀One of the ways he maintains the identity of being omnipotent is by not valuing actual abilities, but instead letting himself be carried away by his own fantasy, not only about himself, but also about the abilities of his peers. Social E2 imagines what others' abilities are like, but is not very aware of them; there is a certain contempt for the intellectual tasks that would allow one to know what they are. And, above all, he cannot accept, concretely and intellectually, that the other may have something that he does not have.

⠀⠀⠀Another idea that social E2s believe in their omnipotence is simply to underestimate what the other does. The ambitious one focuses on seeing the inept part of the other, which he does wonderfully among his neighborhood, the perfect social E1 and the very effective social E3. When someone despises others, he paves the way for the only one who stands out to be himself, and this is still a form of repressed envy. His rim bombing language is striking, full of absolutes, and with a vehemence that makes the other start to doubt himself, and start to accept the social E2s criteria. The speech need not be very thoughtful; sometimes he relies too much on his own ability to improvise, with words that are often passionate but ultimately have little basis.

⠀⠀⠀Speed and anesthesia are ways of disconnecting from the emotional. The mental among the most emotional, the social E2, is undistinguished by tearfulness. Only when he sees the failure or the lie behind his apparent invincibility does he allow himself to enter a closer, warmer terrain.

⠀⠀⠀One of the ways he protects himself from contact with his own limits is by procrastination, with the pressure he puts on himself to achieve the canons required of him. In this way, the ambitious person leaves the task until when he has no choice but to do it in a hurry, forcing his own rigor to be more relaxed. This helps him maintain the idea that he can do everything, because he does it in less time than others; although he ignores the fact that he maintains a high level of stress for it, as well as dislikes the task.

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 work often goes to push. Too much effort is followed by a time of rest, or rather, of necessary detachment, where the social E2 disconnects from the task because the intensity with which he has performed it has left him exhausted. Then, when he energizes himself again, coinciding with the deadline, he will once again undertake a titanic effort, which has the dual purpose of finishing on time and maintaining the idea that he can commit to something and achieve it, reinforcing the idea of omnipotence. 

Crazy ideas related to omnipotence:

• “I don’t need the other; I can handle everything”.

• “I can accomplish anything I set my mind to”.

• “I know what the world needs”.

• “I know everything; I can solve all the problems”.

• “No one will ever be as accomplished as I am”.

• “I can handle everything effortlessly”.

◯   ◦ False good love

⠀⠀⠀E2 seems to love himself very much, it is only a facade. He needs to regain the unconditional love that he once lacked, and he believes he can achieve it by setting up an exchange in which he will be type one and the other will need him forever, which will put him in an important place. By demanding so much of himself to be in a position to give so as not to feel his own shortcomings, the Two stops giving love to himself and looks for it outside.

⠀⠀⠀He not only longs for his partner’s love, which he devalues, but mainly to get a good look at the group, which serves as emotional sustenance and as confirmation of his irrational idea of being indispensable. He regularly dismisses his partner as demanding that he make an effort in which he sees no social reward, and turns to her when he feels defeated. It is in the social sphere, in being adored by the masses, that this character finds his gasoline and his chest swells with abundance.

⠀⠀⠀The social E2 is a mass conqueror. To do this, he seduces, territory by territory, the groups where he comes to receive a general loving gaze. This stimulates an attitude that we could call counter-dependent, because in order not to feel his own dependence on the love of the other, he tries to make him secretly dependent. He infantilizes the other, providing him with everything he thinks he needs at the moment of conquest. As if it were a monetary system in which he leaves the other in debt, being able to play with credit. When you owe money or, for that matter, when you owe love, how can the debtor be malevolent or unloving to the creditor?

⠀⠀⠀Love, therefore, becomes a bargaining chip. The ambitious person, once he has left the other in debt and therefore manipulated into depending on him, devotes himself to the next conquest, carelessly abandoning the relationship for which he has worked so hard and which he has already managed to decant for him. From then on the ambitious person will only return to that relationship when he needs something, in a self-interested way to increase the debt, but there will hardly be a healthy relationship in which the ambitious person exposes his vulnerability and confesses his manipulation; he will always justify himself by thinking that it is the other who needs him. And he will also believe that, in this way, his love for the other is enormous and that he should be valued for what he has supposedly deposited in the relationship.

⠀⠀⠀Paternal love has been perceived as mercantilist. It projects onto the child an image of greatness and omnipotence, and it does not impose limits, with which the child believes he can become unlimited, developing the crazy idea that: “If the other puts limits on me it is because he doesn't love me or you don't understand me”. Being loved for his actions, whether good, bad, loving or not, he is manipulated. Then, the boy, the girl, begins to elaborate the concept that he receives love when he has done certain things, as an act of buying and selling. 

⠀⠀⠀Social Two also thinks that “my love has a superior quality” to other people’s loves. The previously expressed idea of greatness supports this concept of good love, i.e. “I am loved because I am great”. Or also: “If I am not omnipotent, no one will love me. And one more step: the ambitious will love you if you serve the idea that he is great, if you shower him with compliments.

Some crazy ideas related to false good love:

• “I’ll save you”.

• “If I don’t get the approval of the whole audience, I have failed”.

• “If I don’t look like the man I want, I don’t exist or I’m not enough”.

• “If I win you over, you will always hold me in high esteem”.

• “I am loved because I am great”.

• “If I am not omnipotent you will not love me”.

• “If you fall in love with me, you will always love me”.

• “If you know my love, you will not want to try any other”.

⠀⠀⠀A special form of false good love is what we might call kindness. To be someone who moves up the social ladder, besides possessing the omnipotence described above, one must have good intentions. Goodness is a way of covering up hidden egoic interests and displacing them in the shadows. On the conscious side, it would be something like a form of spiritualization of the social E2. It is a shortcut to enlightenment to show oneself as someone who has already achieved such skill and generosity; showing kindness as a way to sublimate ambition and transform it into something transcendental.

⠀⠀⠀What he wants to become or become the object of his ambition is something that once achieved he despises and where he doesn't allow himself to be, because deep down he knows he doesn't have the real ability to display it, or doesn’t deserve it, because among other things, on the way to reaching regency, he took advantage of others, their ideas and their fruits, presenting them as his own. Although he is the most disciplined of the Two, power ends up becoming a burden.

⠀⠀⠀Kindness means attributing goodness to what one does from a real disconnect with what one desires. It is a cover-up, a falsehood. True kindness is different from walking through life naively. The inability to understand the degree of shadow cast by your seemingly altruistic actions only reinforces the self-centered generosity displayed by the ambitious. From there, he can hurt and wound himself, since he is unaware that his seemingly kind acts actually seek a secret goal: to dominate the other through dependence.

⠀⠀⠀Sometimes, when the social E2 becomes aware that something goes wrong, a numbness sets in, a kind of almost dissociative anesthesia. For him, it is as if a saint could act sinfully, something almost unthinkable. The guilt and shame associated with this moment are capitalized, mixed with the stupor of discovering some hidden intentions that he had been denying. Sometimes there you show yourself to be falsely humble, believing that you are running away from the repercussions of your actions. Other times, you can get in touch with the other, understand that your superiority is nothing more than a shell, and get rid of its weight, situating yourself as human before others and before yourself.

Let’s look at some examples of crazy ideas:

• “I am the best support for anyone through my help”.

• “I am one of the best people you will ever meet”.

• “I will save you”.

• “My gift is spontaneity and through it your people will love me”.

• “I do so much for you”.

• “No one will listen to you like I do”.

• “I sacrifice myself for others”.

◯   ◦ The Chosen One

⠀⠀⠀In order to lead groups, or to believe that they are in a position to do so, social E2s consider the crazy messianic idea that they possess some abilities far superior to others, and that this makes them significantly different. This idea of being the Chosen One, the son of God, the designated successor, or being at the right hand of the father, is almost a delusional idea. Being so narcissistic, he blushes mostly because of his small base. 

⠀⠀⠀In short, someone who believes that the world is a social ladder, and that he is capable of anything, who considers himself intrinsically good and with a different, almost unique love, it is normal for him to think that he can lead others, or to postulate himself as the new Jesus Christ or Savior of the masses. Napoleon, Julius Caesar, Alexander the Great, Evita Peron or Cleopatra are good examples. They felt that they should lead their people to victory because under their protection the empire would be better and wiser. Social E2 has a very old instinctive ability to assert itself in the face of authority, even if it conflicts with it. And this ability was based on having been an emotional reference figure for his parents. 

Some crazy ideas:

• “I have a great destiny foreseen by my parents”.

• “Only I can give”.

• “When they know what I am worth, they will all bow down to me”.

• “One day he will appoint me as his successor”.

• “I am someone special, touched in some way by the hand of God”.

4. OTHER CHARACTERISTICS AND

PSYCHODYNAMIC CONSIDERATIONS

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◯   ◦ Cold

⠀⠀⠀Within Ennea-type 2, who is the most emotional type, this is the least so among the three subtypes. If the defense mechanism of the E2 is repression, which turns unconscious the thoughts, cravings and necessities regarded as unacceptable, in the Social E2 this strategy leads to an almost complete cooling of emotions. There are times in which, faced with a significantly painful happening, he “freezes” and loses contact with part of his emotional world.

⠀⠀⠀The Social Two can therefore remain impossible with nothing and no one able to question his aggrandizement. If anyone saw that he cannot do something, that he doesn't know or isn’t worthwhile, it would be catastrophic because a self-referential must not ever allow himself to fail. At the same time, this coldness and hardness protects him and helps him cover his terror of being once again betrayed and that no one catches him in a fall. “To protect himself, he sometimes laughs at his feelings or ironizes them, in an attempt to avoid them, or altogether trivializes and doesn't own them”.

⠀⠀⠀He shows himself immensely empathic and emotional when he is set to conquer. Just as he is emotionally indifferent once it doesn’t interest him anymore or when he abandons it for another conquest.

⠀⠀⠀The Social E2 can go, from a deep subjectivity, to transgressing the norms thanks to his ease in diverting responsibility for his acts, nullifying his emotions, justifying inadmissible deeds, focusing all of his energy on the object of his ambition, above the current moral codes or certain general conventions.

⠀⠀⠀To avoid contact with his inner lack and vulnerability, he shows himself only from his surface, with a hidden fear, keeping everyone from knowing his darker, more needy and defective side. Or rather he covers the mistakes he makes with lies and arrogance, defending himself with total vehemence and a certain air of innocence, which overwhelms or pushes others away.

◯   ◦ Egocentric

⠀⠀⠀His zest for being in the center of attention giving, organizing, doing or talking, is another way in which he pales his sense of solitude and insufficiency, as he confirms the conviction in being the center of the universe. He thinks that from this place no one will be able to question him, nor degrade him by taking him away from the stage from which he receives a transient admiration that he mistakes for love.

⠀⠀⠀Ultimately, he is infatuated with himself; he is his most interesting conquest. In this perspective, he interprets the behaviors of others as referring to himself, be it positively or negatively. And demonstrates a great talent in entangling others for the satisfaction of his necessities.

◯   ◦ Demanding and Hypercritical

⠀⠀⠀Inside the Social E2 there is a feracious and insatiable inner father, who shows himself demanding, cold and without compassion, in the form of two coexistent inner currents. One does not tolerate that he diverts from the ambition and ideals that he has fixated. Only when reaching them will he value himself positively, although for a brief period of time, which will rapidly turn to another objective or territory to conquer. The other current, which flows in parallel, is an aggressive intentionality, a buried anger not always conscious, which is normally directed at himself, neglecting his personal care, health, resting times or allowing himself to receive affection or care.

The Social E2 follows an interiorized message from the parents: “Whatever you do, it’s never enough”. Because of this he resorts to self-indulgence, occasionally; so that he can lower his own prosecutory angst or negative judgements that he elaborates about himself and which he sees in the look of whom he has validated as an authority.

⠀⠀⠀Sometimes, he can simulate withdrawal but as a way to demonstrate how without himself nothing works.

⠀⠀⠀And this anger against the self also finds a way of discharge onto others in competition or despise.

⠀⠀⠀As says Karen Horney, these are two sides of the same coin:

⠀⠀⠀“The proud develops a series of values that determine what he accepts in himself, of which he must be glorified and be proud of. But this system of values has to determine what must be rejected, disdained and hated; and one is inseparable from the other. Pride and self-hatred are two expressions of the same process.”

◯   ◦ Depreciative

⠀⠀⠀Similarly to E1, the Social E2 has invalidated his progenitors in some way and has developed, although this remains on the shadow, a profound despise of mistakes, imperfection, slowness, stupidity, pessimism or fragility, both in himself and others.

⠀⠀⠀This devaluation starts to generate itself in the oedipal phase, with the polarization of the maternal and paternal figures, where one is idealized and the other despised, and then afterwards depreciating both. This leaves him, invariably, in a relational place in which he doesn't belong and that is horizontal or above the parents. By devaluing them, he lacks parental figures to idealize and with which to identify. This, in turn, will be the seed for not recognizing, as an adult, the power-figures, self-referencing as the only trustworthy authority.

◯   ◦ Rebellious and Tyrannical

⠀⠀⠀Ever since childhood they have realized how being close to authority provides him a deal of favors and benefits compared to his equals. They have learned that holding privileged information or taking part in decision-making gives him a certain power.

⠀⠀⠀Thus, the Social Twos characterize themselves by believing to know better than others or that they are more efficient than the rest and by depreciating, like proper envious, others’ attributes. It is truly complicated for them to give up authority for someone, above themselves and their own convictions.

⠀⠀⠀In many biographies of Social Twos there are life-stories of certain intensity and instability. These experiences, mixed with their ideas of grandiosity and importance, make him believe that they have certain privileges or that they’re above others. They could resemble a Conservation E2 in this; notwithstanding, they are different in that the ambitious do this from a manifested anger and a superb and despot demandingness.

⠀⠀⠀They have their own moral code, with which they decide what norms should or shouldn’t be respected. This regulamentation can change over time, at his whim, if the circumstances require it, showcasing a total indifference to the ethical implications of other natures. They use and abuse a selective memory in regards to responsibility in his issues.

⠀⠀⠀The lack of clarity with respect to his roles and the absence of limits within the subsystems of the family suppose the greatest obstacle for a Social E2 to manage the tasks related to taking authority. This character at times wants to be a brother (colleague), and at others, a father (leader) to the group.

⠀⠀⠀With his critical thinking, scathing and depreciative, and his narcissistic fantasy of omnipotence, doubts that someone can lead him. Somehow stores in memory that one day he delivered himself, naively, to his parents’ will, and was used and betrayed. Since then is his suspiciousness towards authority.

◯   ◦ Intolerant of Limits

⠀⠀⠀The Social E2 doesn’t realize that there are external limits to getting what he desires nor to his possibilities. Curiously, given his aggressive and confrontational ways, neither does he know how to impose them to others (even if through humiliation). Because he can’t register abuse or aggression as such, and may humiliate himself so as not to lose a relationship. Moreover, the pain he feels in the possibility of loss isn’t so much related to the bond itself as it is to contacting the idea of not being worthy and the following abandonment, which would be an even greater humiliation.

◯   ◦ Intolerant of Critics

Without relating to his own frustrations, the ego grows exponentially, because it is very difficult for people of this subtype to sustain the possibility of failing or being defective to the eyes of others, as well as risking himself to receive any type of criticism, which seem unbearable.

◯   ◦ Competitive

⠀⠀⠀From this exalted self-image there is no competition possible. If we ask a Social E2 if they are competitive, they will adamantly say no:

“I’m competent, not competitive. I don’t need to compete. It would be ... vulgar”. — ANA BAZA

⠀⠀⠀You “know” you are the best and want to be given your rightful place. And while you generally maintain an attitude of temperance, security and confidence, it doesn’t always pay off. Entering the competition means wanting something you don’t have and that would put you in touch with lack or envy, which underlie your character; or even more terrifying, with the emptiness that causes the feeling of helplessness:

⠀⠀⠀I would never have said I was competitive because, honestly, when I was little I saw all the other girls as so inferior to me that there was no competition possible.

⠀⠀⠀Until I started getting sick because a smart girl showed up in class and I couldn’t take it. I underwent the stress and strain that made me sick for a year, with severe headaches and dizziness. This I never acknowledged; what I remember is that when I repeated the year, due to my absences to go from doctor to doctor, the first thing I thought was:

“If I was doing well before, now I will be no match”.

⠀⠀⠀At work I also suffered this hidden competition for myself when a possible rival appeared. I have suffered a lot when I have seen a person more valid than me in some aspect, close to my reference man or woman. There I saw my shortcomings that I lowered by not being on the level”. — ROSA USELETI

⠀⠀⠀Your ego cannot conceive that there is a worthy competitor. You have already beaten the most difficult and powerful competitor in your childhood: your mother or your father. Hence your pleasure in conquering the giant and then despising or abandoning him. The underlying fear is that if you don't succeed, he will become what you fear most: useless. Then will come contempt and expulsion, and he will be abandoned, as in his childhood, to a chaotic emotional world and loneliness. 

⠀⠀⠀The person of this character has built his self-esteem around being valid and useful to others. If it doesn’t work out, there comes the threat of not being useful, with the consequent abandonment: “Everyone leaves, or I kick you out”, they often say, but it is nothing more than a way of confirming their narrative of orphanhood and the duty of self-reliance. Faced with this fall, Social E2 pulls himself together, isolates his fear, shrinks his heart, freezes his emotions, and swears he won't need anyone.

◯   ◦ Hunger of Success, Blindness to Failure

⠀⠀⠀The person of this character has incorporated, early in life, the expectations that laid upon her, which drove her to have exit in whatever it is that she purports to. Thus she is not, in absolute, prepared to fail. Thanks to her fantasy, the defense mechanisms of repression and sublimation, and her self-concept of grandiosity, she camouflages it so skilfully that it can't be seen.

⠀⠀⠀Ever since she was little she would talk eloquently about herself as someone who does many things, of which she is certain; and that “all” are done well, which is not as certain. The key is in the adults believing her and giving motivation to keep being this way, so that she may feel admired and also quite very powerful. Sees herself as capable of convincing others, including of her lies. This way she incorporates an image of herself in which she is expected to do important and innovative things and that she is successful in all she does.

⠀⠀⠀The Social E2, when getting to adulthood, tries to reproduce the same situation imagining lots of projects and telling this as were done as a little boy or girl. Thus almost all energy is focused on professional life, mistaking the conquering of territories with receiving love. This way he is kept in contact with constant objectives that allow him to develop his self-image as competent and admirable.

⠀⠀⠀He is an expert in sublimating every setback and makes others see that, even under pressure, his efforts don’t cost him. Recollects exhibit in his different personal and professional campaigns and this benefits him in such a way that he keeps the feeling of accomplishing everything he purports himself. Nonetheless, even though he achieves important merits, he sells more than he can give. In this light he can’t see how many casualties have been left in his way, and that he does not share, confirming his own neurosis.

⠀⠀⠀Failure in the working ambit is one of the few opportunities a Social E2 will have to realize how far can go his self-sabotage and the pain he inflicts in others.

⠀⠀⠀All energy, creativity, effort and passion that he puts in work is done in detriment of his personal life. He sees all that is amorous, familiar, fraternal, or his own physical and mental health, as a moorland he only visits. He has gotten to the point of forgetting to play, or enjoying the world of love and affection; all of it to avoid connecting to his own vulnerability.

⠀⠀⠀Taken to an extreme, the Social E2 won’t care about his alimentation, nor his health and most basic and urgent necessities, that he considers inopportune, faced with tasks of higher priority, that are the ones deserving of his attention.

⠀⠀⠀When he fails, the Social E2 hides home or escapes by seeking big innovations in life: changing his social surroundings, his partner or work, maybe even his country. Or he may refuge in different addictions, such as sex, drugs, gambling... or work, which is the most beloved and prioritized thing for him. Among the Enneatypes, we may definitely define him as the workaholic.

⠀⠀⠀If he can’t keep a romantic relationship, he will center on friendships to deaden the emptiness. Even then, if he fails professionally, projects are redirected to the partner with bigger expectations and demands, planning trips, setting rules to her life and trying to “improve” her, as if he had the strategic manual of the good partner; in this way he projects his own ambition onto the other.

⠀⠀⠀This obsessive drive to success may manifest itself in the formula of “it’s never enough”, coincident with the message received from the maternal figure: “You are not, and not ever, enough”. Every goal accomplished isn't turned to anything if not the fragile confirmation of his grandiosity and indispensability, but the emptiness is insatiable and demands constant conquers and astounding deeds.

◯   ◦ Envious

⠀⠀⠀Envy is the monster of the Social Two. Realizing that he envies would be contacting needs, something he lacks, and this would lead him to inadequacy and the emotional void. Contrary to E4, he uses Envy as a drive to overcome himself, as a jumpstart to conquer what another has. But the things, as they are: his eye is aimed at the other: what power they hold, what talents, or gifts that he hasn’t. Of course that, again in contrast to the Four, this character feeling envy doesn’t result in a way to be seen. To be admired he must be useful.

5. EMOTIONALITY AND FANTASY

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⠀⠀⠀E2 Social resorts to fantasy for two purposes: first, as a defense mechanism to avoid making real contact with his more depressive emotions and underlying deficiency states; and second, to escape from the boredom caused by everyday life or reality itself.

⠀⠀⠀His strong emotionality is functional when he foreshadows that goal he wants to achieve, that satisfies the passion of ambition, and fantasizes about the sense of accomplishment he will get from achieving it. And also, as a way to generate enthusiasm and excitement in others.

⠀⠀⠀You have been told by your family that you must know how to contain yourself emotionally. Many people of this subtype have experienced anaclitic depressions in childhood, but have learned to mask them. Since hidden depressions appear cyclically in adulthood, fantasy is an easy resource for escaping them.

⠀⠀⠀Their imagination is fueled by reading, which was often, in childhood, the refuge to disconnect from their own experiences and from that vast emotional world that no one helped them understand or regulate. 

⠀⠀⠀Despite being an emotional character, there is strict control over emotions, so that few are available: disgust and anger. The rest is not as real as it seems, because emotion does not flow with thought and action, but it is fantasy that gives rise to the different emotions and regulates their intensity according to the interest of the moment. The examination of reality is characterized by an overvaluation and downsizing that keeps fantasy alive.

⠀⠀⠀By means of obvious stereotypes, the E2 Social modifies reality by orienting itself toward general thinking, excessively abstract and full of absolutes. These generalizations are intended to maintain the illusion of understanding reality while completely modifying it. The goal is not to question the feeling of omnipotence. The reality that E2 Social sees is built, in part, with bricks taken from factual facts, and also with others taken from a very particular fantasy. In this reverie, he lives in a world where he is a special, lucky and important being, and the people who inhabit it live accordingly. And this is how he keeps his ideal of himself high.

⠀⠀⠀The histrionic can also be understood as a lived imagination, where living in the here and now is replaced by an ideal construction of living. Social E2 constantly creates and recreates in his mind sublime situations that could happen to him. It is somewhat similar to E7 self-absorption or the milkmaid in the story. Being an optimistic character, it is difficult for him to see the negative aspects or the price to pay to achieve his goals.

⠀⠀⠀In general, Social E2 thinks in images, sees what he imagines, and, starting from the fact that he can with any enterprise he sets his mind to, starts to believe. In fact, he creates an ideal situation in his mind and tries to make things happen as he imagined, forcing reality, people and himself, but he will not see failure or how he forces others so easily. He is particularly adept at “inflating” reality like a turkey unfurling its tail. He is a prêt-à-porter tailor who constructs reality according to his needs and always in his favor. As Napoleon said after winning the first battles in Egypt: “I already see myself following in the footsteps of Alexander the Great. I imagine myself founding a new religion, marching to Asia on an elephant with a new Koran in my hand”.

⠀⠀⠀The ambitious person likes to anticipate in his mind future successes, also to better structure the goals he must achieve. This positive visualization of his projects leads him to compulsive action that covers up the deep feeling of emptiness. Moreover, just like E7, he confuses fantasizing with doing. He gorges himself on fantastic projects by wearing the medal before the battle even begins. Social E2 uses fantasy to give wings to his emotionality, turning into a gale in the service of the ambition of the moment. The downside is that he doesn’t take care of relationships or attend to his basic needs, expecting others to do the same; if he doesn’t see that match, he gets angry and charges.

⠀⠀⠀He imagines shocking and unexpected events that will solve them, conceives thoughts that do not follow fixed rules or logical connections, and this very mental mode reinforces the idea of himself as a particularly intuitive and resourceful person, bordering on genius. Your intellectual life is very intense, but not always reasonable, and you search for data to confirm your intuitions, leaving no room for doubt or confusion. 

⠀⠀⠀The superficiality that is attributed to you is due, in part, to the lack of contact with your real emotions.  Not touching the pain or not “knowing” what is really happening is a result of the emotional freezing characteristic of Two and, more specifically, of Social E2, and generates situations in which disconnection is evident.

⠀⠀⠀We can consider Social E2 a consumer of projects; a glutton for ambition. But he does not stay to receive love, not even his own satisfaction, which is really fleeting. On the contrary, once the purpose is achieved, it loses its emotional value, leaving room for new desires, which will materialize in new goals that will only serve to stimulate and retro feed a blind and overflowing personal ambition. The goal achieved never finds a level of value that can be considered a point of arrival, of full and lasting satisfaction. He doesn’t even stop to savor what he has conquered. He destroys it and moves on to something else. And it is precisely this passage from the fantasy of possessing to the reality of the relationship with the object that makes him lose interest in the object. 

⠀⠀⠀Like all emotional characters, he confuses desire, or rather, hyper-desire, with needs. The Social Two, disconnected from his primary needs (to be cared for, loved, recognized as a human being), transfers organismic satisfaction to the conquest of the public. Dynamics that always leave him deeply unsatisfied and in that magical thought of being important that gives him the illusion of feeling his existence. 

⠀⠀⠀To build the emotional dynamism necessary to seduce the group and thus receive their acceptance, she recreates tricks and fireworks in her fantasy to “stimulate” the most hidden strings of those she wants to convince. There she finds the strength that allows her to show herself to others as someone solid and self-assured, and therefore worthy of being heard, able to interpret and give voice to the ideals and concerns of the listener. 

6. CHILDHOOD

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⠀⠀⠀The title of this chapter is paradoxical, considering that Social E2, precisely, did not have the typical childhood experiences and probably never felt like a child. It was very early in his evolutionary development in terms of psychomotricity, speech, and sphincter control. His intuitive capacity and ability to perceive the emotions of others and understand the experiences of the adult world soon become evident. In part, this is because he develops empathy early on, exercising it with a supportive parent to whom he offered his utmost attention and care.

◯   ◦ The Lack of Limits

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 soon realizes that neither parent is really available to him, so he maintains his own authority. And in his realm there are no boundaries, either internal or external; anything is possible. There is no restraint, emotional or behavioral, from any figure. The image of omnipotence that he will build from his earliest years confirms this capacity for self-government. 

⠀⠀⠀Social subtype E2 has not been a particularly difficult child for his mother. He has learned quickly to be responsible, to mature prematurely and to be considered the right hand of one of his parents or perhaps, as Paolo Baiocchi says, the left hand, to replace his father as soon as possible. He was a self-sufficient boy or girl who was mainly supported by his mother, and neither the mother nor the father had to take care of the child.

⠀⠀⠀The privileged relationship between the mother and her offspring does not allow the entry of the father, who, in the Oedipal phase, is expelled from the relationship or leaves the family, becoming a peripheral father to be forgotten or idolized as long as he keeps his distance and does not interfere with her wishes. If the boy or girl allows some form of rebellion against the father, it will always be to defend the mother or siblings, who may be being treated in an unfair, oppressive or abusive way.

⠀⠀⠀From a very young age he shows autonomy in his actions and thoughts, developing a very severe critical conscience towards himself and others. He is treated as a more mature child, capable of being supported by adults, so he does not learn what he may need from others, who can also be a source of support for him.

⠀⠀⠀There comes a time when he begins to take the initiative in his actions, taking on responsibilities that are usually well received by at least one parent. As an adult, he likes to set himself up as a point of reference or guide for others, going so far as to intrude on their desire to help when no one has asked him to.

⠀⠀⠀You place yourself closer to the expectations of adults and the parental system than to the fraternal system, without experiencing the neglect of siblings or feeling complicit with them. This leaves you with a deep sense of loneliness and of being in no man's land.

⠀⠀⠀The perception of oneself as someone endowed with magical, healing love has a clear origin in the childhood scenario of E2 Social and can be attributed to two very important phenomena: the wound in attachment, which will become mainly ambivalent, and the illusion of being greater than one's parents.

⠀⠀⠀E2 Social subtype is a good boy, a good girl, in early childhood. He is the joy of the house, eats and sleeps well, talks fast, is witty, obeys willingly, and is always ready to please those around him.

⠀⠀⠀At this moment a triangulation begins to take shape, from which he will not escape in adulthood, reproducing it in his couple relationships. If it is a girl, she feels that she is daddy’s favorite, above even mommy, whom she soon begins to see as an equal and rival in paternal love.

⠀⠀⠀Somehow, one or both parents have high expectations and trust that he or she will be someone important in life and surpasses them. It doesn’t have to be an economic triumph, but cultural, social and intellectual. However, they do not accompany him or her emotionally on this yellow brick road. Some Two Socials speak of parents who are too distracted, depressed, or irritated with the child's emotional needs. Others, of parents who are too busy or unable to tune into the child’s deep affective experiences. The parents have not developed the necessary function that would have helped the child process and metaphorize the intense and painful affective phases. Therefore, the boy, the girl, learned prematurely to distract himself from the experiences of suffering by drawing others’ attention to his false sense of well-being, feeling satisfied, or his false sense of fullness, showing easy enthusiasm.

◯   ◦ Abandonment and Depression

⠀⠀⠀An original wound of E2 Social, and one that he shares with E4, even though the output is different, is the experience of feeling emotionally abandoned by the mother. This, although there are no objective reasons for dependence on the father, is subject to him, adhering to patriarchal values of subordination of the feminine to the masculine. In general, the mother – due to the father’s absence – takes on most of the family commitments, without allowing herself to enjoy the pleasure of caring for her children or herself.

⠀⠀⠀Sometimes the mother gets sick, works a lot, or has to be absent due to family demands. In any case, affective contact with the child during its first years of life is insufficient.

⠀⠀⠀The wound of childhood manifests itself as a kind of infantile depression, similar to the so-called anaclitic depression, which involves a loss of continuity in affective development. The disconnection during the fusion phase, normal after the first year of life, is not fluid, and this first separation will be experienced as painful grief. As a consequence, in adult life separations will cost this character; moreover, he will struggle to seek personal validations in relationships.

⠀⠀⠀The pain experienced by the boy-girl in the bond formation stage will make it difficult for him in his maturity to create and consolidate deep bonds, including friendships, for which he becomes a rather lonely person despite meeting many people and being in various groups. This difficulty makes E2 Social an individualist who seeks relationships from which he does not wish to separate himself; this is his existential paradox.

⠀⠀⠀The affective contact sought is a neo-proposal of the fusional relationship typical of the mother-child dyad during the first years of life, a strong hidden affective dependence. From this derives his constant need to feel confirmed and, although he keeps it hidden, a deep demand to feel loved.

◯   ◦ Greatness

⠀⠀⠀In the childhood of an E2 Social there is little affective containment from the parent pair. You learned quickly to be seen, but also gave up early on the primary need to share and understand your emotions, and to receive support for your problems.

⠀⠀⠀Often this boy, this girl, in order to feel some affective support, has become an accomplice of a parent. It is the mother who asks him for his concrete support in the practical and effective management of the family, or even of the couple. And sometimes he is treated differently from his siblings in family decisions. This responsibility and illusion of being important, which the child accepts, are interpreted as a love that, although it doesn't warm him, warms his heart and will soon turn into pride, because it is a mystification.

⠀⠀⠀This paradoxical situation can be managed by the boy or girl resorting to a fantasy of grandeur, building the illusion of having imaginary powers, of having the strength to bear the weight of responsibility, of being an essential person within the family. Illusions and convictions that are confirmed by the manipulative messages of the parents who conspire with such a fantasy.

⠀⠀⠀Simultaneously, a parent loads the child with his or her own dream of personal greatness, which may or may not have a specific direction. The requirement appears implicitly in everyday life or can be made explicit in an ambiguous way such as, “You must become great in some way. In any case, the son, the daughter, feels that he must fulfill this mandate derived from his parents’ need to satisfy his own ideal. Behind this request hides the narcissistic distrust of being able to show off the little one, or the fear of not being able to respond to his own parental ideal”.

◯   ◦ The King in search of Territory

⠀⠀⠀The conditional love on which he has learned to feed and the consequent affective distance with his siblings, as well as a subtle competition with his father or mother, lead him to feel deeply alone. He does not experience a sense of belonging, he has no real place in the family.

⠀⠀⠀Occupying a place that is not his, will be for this subtype the impulse to keep looking for a place in the world that meets his expectations, with the secret intention of filling his lack of not being seen and loved by him, which he feels deeply. He was a boy or girl capable of sensing his parents’ needs and acting accordingly. Sometimes it even seemed to him that he possessed magical abilities and could know the others’ needs before his own.

⠀⠀⠀Among the painful experiences that this boy or girl hides from others, there is also a deep sense of shame about the behavior of one of his parents, who somehow represents a danger to his social image.

⠀⠀⠀The shame for something that has to do with them and the self-devaluation are experienced by the Social E2 child in a traumatic way and are experiences that will accompany him or her all his or her life. It will be precisely these secret experiences, which are not recognized by the adults who have been hidden, that will lead him to narcissistic compensation: during childhood he will behave like a child older than his age; and as an adult his relationships will always be strategic and he will maintain a strong intellectual activity.

⠀⠀⠀Most of them were children physically bigger than their peers and siblings, and with a bigger appetite. Faced with his siblings, he emerges as “the best”, the one who adheres the most to the expectations of his parents, who also publicly acknowledge him, so he feels committed to maintaining a very high performance.

7. PERSON & SHADOW: THE

DESTRUCTIVE FOR ONESELF

AND FOR OTHERS

⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 wants to be a hero. He believes he has everything going for him to be one. He has created a character exclusively of light, banishing to the shadow territory everything that seems unworthy, inappropriate, absent, or dark. No nuance that devalues him has been revealed, and if it happens, it will be up to him to project it onto others, to deny or justify it, with unbearable vehemence.

⠀⠀⠀Maintaining such a high-level character makes it necessary to hide aspects such as envy, rivalry, resentment, fear of error, and a deep sense of not belonging that leaves him very much alone behind the facade of resolute control.

⠀⠀⠀As a hero, he not only assumes that he has power, but also that he can abuse it to achieve an end that he will disguise as a noble common goal. Social E2 turns everything into a power struggle. In which he obviously aspires to win, without caring about hurting or losing a relationship (something he doesn’t understand, when it happens). He is very adept at omitting or denying his failures, because he cannot maintain, even to himself, that he is not capable of doing everything he commits to.

⠀⠀⠀The vicissitudes of life, in this subtype, resemble a tense surge followed by an equally powerful hangover: from self-exalted excitement to consequent de-energization. His actions are frantic and compulsive, without assessing the risks. Their goal is always to go further.

⠀⠀⠀Spontaneity in expression is also used in a manipulative way, with the goal of impressing others in order to gain their consent and attention. The reality is that this character does not like to reveal himself: wanting to be perfect prevents him from showing himself as he really fears to be. Show the butterfly and hide the worm. It is difficult for him to be perceived emotionally involved in the competition. He wants to dominate, but without “getting his hands dirty”. He doesn’t like to feel the emotions that can arise from open competition, as this would put him in touch with envy or fear.

⠀⠀⠀When Social E2 feels his self-esteem threatened, he falsifies reality and lets out his aggression in order to cover up the sadness and restore a sense of well-being.

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 makes a logical justification of what he feels deeply as painful and, above all, of what he considers unfair to him. To do so, he makes a transition from what he feels to what would be fair to do and feel, which activates a hyper-compensation of the experience of inferiority and of not feeling adequate.

⠀⠀⠀This character lacks reserve, meticulousness, and a sense of economy. You don’t like to keep secrets, because the need to relate trumps any assessment of timeliness or relevance. By revealing the confidences that the other gives you, seduced by a manipulative closeness, you reveal your little intimacy and are unaware of the betrayal. You don’t know a relationship of trust; don’t believe in it. The result is that he harms himself by feeding his experience of loneliness and lack of trust in others, of their “generous and friendly love”.

⠀⠀⠀The need to seduce people and groups is closer to devouring the object of seduction than simply wanting to be loved. It is an oral-receptive character. Although it is difficult for this subtype to achieve obesity, they are large individuals with a rather self-destructive attitude toward food, as they use it not as pleasure, but to cover up the feeling of emptiness on the occasions when they come into contact with it. It is also possible that they deny themselves food, as a way of denying that they have basic needs, or as a paradoxical form of revenge, denying themselves what food means in contact with life.

⠀⠀⠀When you are not the center of attention, a deep feeling of loneliness comes easily. This is why he surrounds himself with many people, even though he feels lonely inside. The approval of others is the only lifeline in the face of this intense feeling of loneliness and desolation that he experiences.

⠀⠀⠀He is hypersensitive to criticism and does not like to be challenged. The pretense of admiration and the rejection of criticism are his way of trying to maintain a self-esteem that, despite appearances, is very shaky.

⠀⠀⠀He is not aware of his exploitation of the other because he justifies it with a greater need to fulfill the common mission. Nor is he aware of his affective exploitation when he involves others in his projects, or when he seduces them with his ability to help, just to feed his self-image of goodness and to feel that the other needs him.

⠀⠀⠀He positions himself as a spokesperson for the unspoken desires of others, with an enthusiasm that generates warmth within himself and others. 

“Since I was a little girl, I didn’t feel seen or loved.  He was the youngest of three siblings; that is why I always sought affective recognition, based on helping and becoming indispensable, altruistic beyond the limit. I gave up my life as a child: I was my mother's helper, the daughter she would like to have”. — ANTONIO MESSIA

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 subtracts the affect from consciousness, so that he is unable to simultaneously experience the cognitive and affective components of an experience (which are isolated from each other). 

⠀⠀⠀One of Social E2 favorite ways of self-destructing is a taste for addictions. Television, social media, food, sex or drugs. But the one he practices with the most pleasure is that of work addiction, which allows him to banish his affective life, his self-care, or his possibilities for enjoyment into the shadow territory, causing interruptions in the flow of consciousness. Concealing your needs allows you to continue to ignore them. And when he realizes that he has neglected what is his and yours, he punishes himself by feeling unworthy and despicable. He has sold his soul to the profession. His is a perpetual race against the clock, with no satisfaction lasting more than a brief moment, just long enough to take a breath and embark on a new project. This addiction helps him to deny the suffering he experiences when he comes into contact with emptiness or the depressive feelings underlying his character.

⠀⠀⠀The people who surround him in the professional or affective field enter his merry-go-round, where there is no real exchange, where there is no room for a voice that does not serve to support his need for protagonism. Social E2 invades the lives of others like an unstoppable wind. Teamwork means having a team at your service. The result, in the people around him, is a feeling of inadequacy, of annihilation and alarm. His internal and external “rush” is in service of the fact that no one really knows him or can get in the way of his expansion plan.

⠀⠀⠀Like the other two subtypes, the E2 Social appears free and uninhibited, but only in appearance. In reality, his freedom is illusory, as is his supposed courage. Actions with social impact and courageous behavior are based on a lack of awareness of how they move in the world. What dictates his behavior is, above all, his annoyance with the rules. You could say that he constructs a personal morality, composed of his own norms and values that may vary each time. This is not self-indulgence, as in E7. It is not even justifications for a possible feeling of guilt, as an E6 would do. These are logical justifications in which the Social E2 faces only himself and others do not exist as autonomous persons. A self-referential moral constructed to optimize the functionality of the neurotic project. The consequence of this intellectual process ends with the confirmation of his own logic, instead of examining reality. This leads him to not cultivate doubt and to fall into the illusion of omnipotence.

⠀⠀⠀The constitution and maintenance of these maneuvers depend on primitive defense mechanisms. To wit: The separation of negative representations of self and object from positive representations; the projection onto the other of the negative aspects of self; and the consequent devaluation of objects and relationships that are not functional in the project of overvaluing self. The other is an object, an instrument to use depending on what you need for your project.

⠀⠀⠀His high expectations and the image he has created of himself prevent him from being free to publicly reveal his limits, his vulnerability, or his needs; including the fact that he seeks support, care, and protection, which would result in the lowering of his social image and the impoverishment of his self-image, he idealizes the big da, something that would be very painful for him. Underneath the god is hidden a child who could never be like that and who grew up hiding his humiliating smallness.

⠀⠀⠀The denial of vulnerability is a patriarchal aspect of the ambitious, who always wants to be on the crest of the wave and will never ask. In this way, he cancels out the feelings of inadequacy that would obscure his self-exaltation. It is the trap of false abundance that, in the long run, turns against him at the intrapsychic level, with feelings of painful deprivation.

“When the change of conditions no longer requires the effort to maintain the whole, I fall into a frankly depressive psychophysical prostration, which I fear and hide as much as possible”. — ALBA ARENA

⠀⠀⠀Intolerant of mediocrity, her passion is in touch with the feeling of self-triumph. For a person as special as she feels, there is no life without excellence, something that leads to self-destructive situations. The game of life is to bet on a winning horse.

⠀⠀⠀Another way in which her destructive capacity acts is through impulsiveness.

⠀⠀⠀The primary experience of loneliness is renewed by experiencing it cyclically throughout life. The person replaces the bitterness and pain experienced by ever new goals that give him, at least as an idealized fantasy, the illusion of wholeness and strength. The permanence in maturity of the attitudes of a sucking and biting baby is what characterizes the destructive form of Social E2.

⠀⠀⠀As is evident, the world of relationships and love is greatly damaged and impoverished in Social E2, who uses it to attack and self-attack. He is afraid of giving up on himself, of losing control, and of his own inner chaos, so if he experiences them, he puts aside the feelings that arise. He positions himself as someone who is uncompromising, rigid, and perfectionist, especially with his family and those closest to him.

⠀⠀⠀His marked elitism makes him very selective with whom he considers part of his inner circle. And in his arrogance, he thinks it is normal that others want to be his friends, but he cannot understand what they could contribute to him. 

⠀⠀⠀He is a territorial, possessive and very utilitarian person, aspects that are diametrically opposed to what love is, so that few people stay among his friends. The work overload he is under leaves him little time for the necessary cultivation and care of friendship, so that he can maintain some distance relationship, but it becomes almost impossible for him on a daily basis. As a metaphor, it works with filial love in the same way as with plants: an E2 Social doesn’t usually have them, because he either drowns them or lets them die of thirst.

⠀⠀⠀For this person it is difficult, and internally he feels it is very dangerous, to establish solid and stable attachments. He has forgotten in the shadows any need for love; among other reasons, because he is ashamed to show himself dependent, tender, or needy, and has difficulty submitting to the wishes of another.

⠀⠀⠀In his “false” need for independence, he finds it extremely difficult to establish horizontal relationships. Pretending to position oneself as the essential one, the boss, the independent one, or the most capable one invariably makes the other want to run away, tired of being under the tyranny of the emperor. This perpetuates their feeling of not belonging and confirms their inner perception of loneliness.

⠀⠀⠀The damage that is difficult for him to recognize is how he puts the other in a condition of inferiority, since his greatness is unattainable. At the same time, by transmitting his affective need to the other, weakened and pending, he keeps him in a double bind: “you always need me, and you will recognize me as greater than you”.

⠀⠀⠀The theme of love will be dealt with in the following chapter, but it is worth highlighting, even if briefly, E2 Socials relationship with sexuality. His great difficulty with surrender and trust makes this terrain extremely dangerous, if not unnecessary, as he considers that there are more important things to do. There may be two situations that seem opposite, but are not. Either the fear of sexuality prevents you from having intimate relationships, or the fear of intimacy gives rise to compulsive sexual behavior. In other words, either they deny or use sex as a tool for manipulation. The case is not reaching an effective and intimate relationship, something that would leave you without defenses, somehow losing control of the situation and of yourself on an emotional level.

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 is, after all, an unprotected child disguised as a moody giant, who gets emotionally and behaviorally agitated wherever he goes, destroying any possibility of loving and being loved unselfishly. His final revenge takes shape mercilessly by attacking and attacking himself, denying himself any kind of love so as not to feel used, betrayed, excluded, or abandoned again; the heart does not suffer if it is not given the chance to feel.

◯   ◦ Brief clinical Illustrations

⠀⠀⠀For a Social E2, it is necessary to identify the disturbance in the regulation of self-esteem. The grandiose ego persists based on narcissistic inversions, which prevent the formation of a normal, compensated superego integrated with ego ideals. As we have seen throughout this book, Twos expression of pride is an attempt to shake off an insecurity in the realm of self-esteem. Proud people have in common the elimination and hyper-compensation of those who, on the other hand, pre-feelings of inferiority and insufficiency dominate in the Four.

“Asking is difficult for me; I feel it as a form of weakness. I often transfer my needs to others and that makes me feel better; then I don’t notice them. Since taking the SAT I have started to recognize them”. — MAURIZIO MARTELLI

⠀⠀⠀Anger, whose perception and expression is not difficult for this character, can be a parasitic emotion that covers up and mystifies sadness. Therefore, it is opportune to take the occasion when it seems to investigate further.

⠀⠀⠀As for the feeling of excited joy, it may be a defense, linked to intellectualization and strategic elaboration, to overcome, with an imaginative activity, a difficulty with which one does not want to come into contact.

⠀⠀⠀It is convenient that this subtype be in contact with deep experience, with the body that speaks and tells the truth: to stay in the here and now, the only antidote to the intellectualization and internal dialogues with which one intends to console oneself.

8. THE LOVE

⏝⏝⏝⏝

⠀⠀⠀E2s like to touch, laugh, play, look into your eyes, create an atmosphere in which you feel that magic is happening. Contact with an E2 becomes a promise of something profound that will happen in this relationship. And it happens, because for this character each contact represents an opportunity to recreate the state of fusion with the mother, with the illusion of healing the old wound of loneliness that he carries in his heart. This form of contact presents a great difficulty, because it cannot be maintained over time due to its excessive intensity; it seems more like an excitement than a mature feeling.

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 makes promises that he does not keep. The intensity will be interrupted. Two, in general, gives more than he promises and promises more than he gives. It invests heavily in relationships, but is fickle and superficial. Instead of an upward spiral, where the meaningful relationship is gradually cultivated, deepened and nurtured, the E2's set up is made of rises to the top with falls in equal proportion.

⠀⠀⠀E2 Social subtype, as a merchant of a paternal love that he does not know directly, imagines it, idealizing it. He manipulates the relationship by posing as a guide, with the goal of buying filial and admiring love. He wants to be admired and loved as a child might wish. To do this, he sells his enthusiasm with projects and goals, proposing himself as a parent who knows where to go and how to get there. He generously shares it with his children, from whom he expects obedience and service in gratitude and recognition through his efforts to improve his image.

⠀⠀⠀One or both parents have placed their own unmet needs on him, offering him manipulative, utilitarian and conditional love. Thus, all their relationships contain these three components, desperately seeking what they believe is there and what they interpret as unconditional love, which they idealize and can never get back. This leads to continual frustration, which leads to revenge in the form of punishment and withdrawal. Thus, he condemns himself to a life empty of love.

◯   ◦ The Three Loves

⠀⠀⠀According to Claudio Naranjo view, the Two, as an emotional character, represents compassionate love, the mother. However, Social E2 seems to have a more developed love of admiration, like almost all social subtypes, precariously inhabiting compassionate and erotic love.

⠀⠀⠀This love of admiration of his is not, however, as Naranjo says, “a love of God or of other aspects of an abstract kind, such as beauty, music, or art”. Rather, he seeks to impress and be adored, through his magnified image, like a patriarch. Social Two basically presents two distorted ways of admiring love. Since he is unable to give himself to something greater, he turns it into self-adoration. And at the same time, he assigns a disproportionate value to the one he wants to conquer in order to then feel admired.

⠀⠀⠀E2 Social lacked the love that looks up to heaven, as a model of authentic love from mother to father is commonly absent. Moreover, since he disguises himself as an adult and a father, he does not know how to admire, but loves to be admired. He is a child disguised as an adult and a father.

⠀⠀⠀This love of admiration that he longs for leads him to cultivate a self-image as a charismatic person, intense and good at the same time. His great desire is to be loved by the people, an enlightened leader who is followed out of love and not fear.

⠀⠀⠀As for Eros, he belongs to the world of the instinctive, an aspect of himself that is very difficult for him to accept. Sexuality puts him in touch with something that makes him very uncomfortable: his animality. He has lost touch with his essential nature, and secretly suffers from sexual shame. He cannot carry within himself aspects that bring him so close to his need for the other and to his own humanity.

⠀⠀⠀Despite his innate seduction, he runs away from dedication to pleasure, and even more to intimacy, because he feels betrayed just when he felt that ecstasy of oneness in childhood. Love at this level is forbidden territory. The fear of such exposure is overwhelming, and E2 Social becomes evasive so as not to relive the deep sense of deprivation and betrayal that he experienced as a child and that somehow meant the death of an essential part of himself: the capacity to surrender and to trust in being worthy of being loved.

⠀⠀⠀It is useful for Social Two to pay attention to sexuality, to discover it both as play and as a form of self-love. From there you can loosen your armor to abandon yourself to a state of rest and surrender that allows you to detect your innermost needs.

⠀⠀⠀Compassionate love is deeply distorted in the person of this character, and is always utilitarian and exaggerated. Although she has a great capacity for empathy, is generous and sympathetic, she does so from a manipulative movement. The gesture comes from the heart, but the ego quickly turns it into an opportunity, in the form of personal benefit, which is no longer genuine or selfless. 

⠀⠀⠀While she has a real ability to see the light in the other, she puts it into play in the form of cloying flattery and creating a bond of loyalty and debt to her, as a way to create subjects who will follow her.

⠀⠀⠀She cannot be compassionate because her self-exigence makes it difficult for her to see the fragility or the possibility of error, either in herself or in the other. This would be a dangerous opening of the heart, which puzzles her. To avoid this, she maintains a sustained anger that traps her in contemptuous judgment of everyone and everything. This contempt is a defensive reaction, and the devaluation of the other has as a consequence a distancing from both the divine and the human.

⠀⠀⠀He suffers the pain of others, but perverts it through a theatricality born of his hyperemotionalization. The only available path will be to enter the dark night of the soul and go through it with the pain and the lack of a hand, opening himself to his own finitude and vulnerability.

⠀⠀⠀The E2 Social is able to establish supportive relationships and forms of exchange, although always linked to the pursuit of personal benefit. His own neurosis prevents him from giving himself the freedom to receive care and attention and to establish relationships in which maternal love prevails, projecting onto the other his deepest need for affection.

◯   ◦ The Couple

⠀⠀⠀In the couple relationship, the E2 Social is apparently the less dependent Two, although in reality he is counter-dependent. More than intimacy, he seeks recognition of his special gifts and, in one way or another, ends up becoming indispensable. 

⠀⠀⠀The E2 Social person sells a relationship of parity, but what he really wants are subjects. He doesn’t know how to function in horizontal relationships, and in the couple it will be no different. She feels stronger, smarter, faster, more decisive and capable. To prove this to the other, she enters a competition that only ends when the couple submits and she comes out on top. He achieves this thanks to his control and his ability to anticipate, organize and take advantage of every opportunity that arises, leaving the other with a feeling of uselessness, clumsiness, slowness and lack of reflexes that will inevitably impose an internal distance and an unequal relationship. The power has already been established. 

⠀⠀⠀When the E2 Social is in a relationship, sooner or later he will start trying to polish in the other what doesn't fit his ideal. Always from a subtle manipulation he will be modeling these little inconveniences. If the partner makes a mistake or shows some discrepancy, he will be condescending, like a mother who has to educate her child, or he will start a vehement dialectical battle loaded with emotional manipulations until, out of conviction or boredom, the other gives up.

⠀⠀⠀It is in the home that the emperor appears most clearly as a gift and laden with rights, who has far more important matters to attend to than the “occupation” of a home. He gives the love of a father, but not the warmth and tenderness of a mother's love. What Social E2 likes is to organize, plan, decorate and, above all, to order what should be done and how it should be done. It may seem that he is the one who carries the load, but in reality it is the others who take care of the more domestic and daily tasks.

⠀⠀⠀If someone is visiting, it’s different: Social E2 can creatively dazzle and impress guests, even if you have to invest many hours of preparation or subject those closest to you to your multiple perfectionist demands; all for the sake of public image.

⠀⠀⠀He is very possessive and territorial, so if he feels threatened in any way, he will use all his charm, various tricks, and even his seduction skills: all to get the other back. This also applies to friendly relationships. If he is able to touch the pain that the fear of loss causes him, he will experience it first with disbelief and then as something devastating.

⠀⠀⠀Childhood resentment and distrust in the face of possible betrayal, understood as any form of dissent, appears in the form of revenge, which materializes as silence, contempt, distance, cynicism, and coldness. The empress and emperor cyclically need confirmation of their value and position of privilege. Therefore, they expect their partner to make sacrifices that will guarantee their love. To do this, they may ask you to stop doing activities that interest you or any subject that is of relative importance to the other.

⠀⠀⠀E2 Social is and is not in the love relationship. Something internally does not allow him to give himself or commit himself deeply and sincerely, because this entails an archetypal dilemma, which is my dichotomy between fidelity to father or mother, depending on whether he is male or female, and fidelity to the couple. On the other hand, and although he aspires to merge with the other and idealizes love, he is convinced that love is always conditioned and utilitarian, as he experienced it in early childhood.

⠀⠀⠀They usually have many adventures, but rarely pair up and tend to be long-term relationships. In the case of women, they are quite faithful and when they break up, they leave room until the next relationship. There are other cases that have different lovers throughout their lives, but fail to consolidate a couple. Some reasons for this are their high demands, their need for independence and freedom, or their prioritization of the professional over the personal. It is common for E2 Social to leave the relationship, due to frustration of their high expectations, boredom, inability to sustain commitment and intimacy, or not being dumped.

⠀⠀⠀Sometimes they use sex compulsively, as a form of conquest and domination, but also as a means of contact, to discharge accumulated tension, and mainly and unconsciously, to avoid the fear of intimacy. There is no real surrender to Mistress Rose, nor can she easily relinquish control.

⠀⠀⠀The family, as the group, can be the place where the desire for recognition unfolds, occupying a place of reference: good advice, guidance if needed, and protection. Forced in some way to be the emotional support of the system, he cannot appear weak or needy. He tries to avoid displays of affection, as they put him in touch with his vulnerability and he feels he might break.

⠀⠀⠀Social E2 is often used to resolve inter-familial relational conflicts and this gives him a certain power, it leaves him on ground that is under his domain, but which he cannot share with anyone, because he excludes himself from the filial system in order to place himself above others, his siblings and his parents; he is only willing to receive love of admiration. 

⠀⠀⠀She feels very strongly the desire to rise above the masses and mediocrity in order to occupy a privileged place of visibility and personal importance, and she manages to satisfy this need by helping the couple to achieve a social visibility useful for their personal project.

◯   ◦ Confusion between Love and Territory

⠀⠀⠀He confuses the love he receives from groups with unconditional love. He thinks it is love when, in fact, it is recognition. Social E2 experiences this as acclaim from those who become part of his territory. And if we talk about possession, it is impossible that it is love. In his exaltation before the applause of the person of this character, he confuses being admired with being a group, loved, accompanied, loved, sheltered, included.

◯   ◦ Maternity and Paternity

⠀⠀⠀Social woman E2 has not, in general, played with dolls. When she observes it in others, she despises it as something superficial, absurd, and as if it is unnecessarily lacking. She does not feel the urge to be a mother because of this instinct. The mission to fulfill with the world prevails and fills everything. 

⠀⠀⠀The vital project does not include motherhood in principle. There are many goals to fulfill professionally, so the couple is often downgraded. She spends a lot of time in a wide social circle, as she can be immersed in different projects at the same time. 

⠀⠀⠀There are different reasons that can spark the motivation to have children, but none seem to arise solely from love and the satisfaction of a motherhood instinct. The city, or that people around them are thinking about becoming mothers, arouses in them a buried envy. 

⠀⠀⠀Another reason may be, depending on her profession or social position, that motherhood gives her a status that she sees as an added value: to favor her social image, to be consistent with what she says in certain contexts in which she is inserted, or to demonstrate that she can with everything. That’s when she considers it, as one more enterprise to conquer: being a mother.

⠀⠀⠀From the moment she learns of her pregnancy, she starts working as if it were a new project. She informs herself, reads and attends all the courses to show that she will be a good mother. She becomes controlling of herself and her surroundings, but a receptive, loving and nurturing instinct for protection or motherhood awakens in her.

⠀⠀⠀When something goes wrong in parenting, her arrogance and magical thinking leads her to believe that she is solely responsible. Underneath is the deep sense of orphanhood that has accompanied her since childhood, having placed herself above her father and mother, and a real desire to have a family to belong to, albeit, again, from a place of importance.

⠀⠀⠀After you start your new business, you will see everything related to pregnancy and parenthood as an extension of your self-image. 

⠀⠀⠀The Social Two mother prides herself on being active until the last moment, emphasizing her ability to cope with dignity and calm. In reality, there is little contact with her own need for care and rest, as her threshold for physical pain is quite high and she is also unaware of the stress that both she and the fetus are accumulating. He does not want to give up any of his other projects and will only stop if someone external forces him to do so. There may be illusion, but in reality it is a reflection of what he sees in others, and he doesn’t seem to be very aware of the changes that the birth of the baby will bring about in his life or the sacrifices that will be required to be present in education.

⠀⠀⠀At the moment of birth, he may be a bit alert, judging what is happening. He may even want to lead the medical team. It is as if it is not happening to her, a mere observer of the event. It may be that she is planning and coordinating with others rather than focusing on the baby or what she is feeling from a position of just being a mother. The moment of birth can become more of a scenario. 

⠀⠀⠀Social mother E2 intends to go back to work quickly and delegate the daily care, as if that part that is so “human” does not correspond to her. In reality, and without realizing it, he harbors a somewhat disconcerting internal feeling of not knowing and that it is too big for him.

⠀⠀⠀In terms of upbringing, there is an imbalance between neglecting aspects such as contact with the child, taking him to the park or daily care, and overstimulating others, such as the intellectual part or the creativity in which he can act with his own child, as in other aspects of his life: the neocortex, to the detriment of the mammalian brain.

⠀⠀⠀You may find it very difficult to see your child as a being that needs care, attention and presence, with its own rhythm. It seems that there are almost always other priorities, urgencies, and dispersions before attending to it.

⠀⠀⠀There is an abandonment of the creature to the extent that it wants to continue directing most of its energy to its professional or personal projects. In many aspects of parenting, she is fickle and erratic. As for nurturing, she is an ambivalent mother: she can behave in a very refined and rigid way, or be careless, as an extension of the carelessness she has with herself. 

⠀⠀⠀Mothers of this subtype do not play actively. They prefer to use their sense of humor, read stories, or stimulate with toys that have pedagogical recognition. They are very creative and set themselves up as resource providers for their active children at opportunities. They can celebrate the best birthdays, a car socially. In general, they pay more attention to what affects their image, of which their daughter or son is now a part. 

⠀⠀⠀It is practically impossible for them to maintain boundaries in every way. They do not usually enforce punishments, and if they do, they are practically never enforced. Their dialogical and permissive style assures them that their children will indeed respect some minimal rules more implicit than explicit, but with which they feel respected. They are ambiguous and very lax about the rules at home, although if they express their anger, it will be blunt, brief, and without consequence. 

Or they become rigid and demanding and ask for everything at the same time.

SEXUAL TWO  ❛ 𝐒𝐞𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 ❜

✧    ㅤㅤ࣭ ㅤㅤׂ ㅤ ㅤˑㅤ  ㅤ۟ ㅤㅤ𓈒ㅤㅤׂㅤ

⠀⠀⠀When pride invades or parasitizes the sphere of sexual instinct, the emphasis is on being irresistible, unforgettable. This sphere is not only that of the sexual relationship, understood as one of the deepest and potentially pleasurable human bonds of intimacy, but also that of the affective relationship; me-and-you. In the case of Pride, everything that is emotional is oversized and nurtures the feeling of superiority. It will be in this affective bond with the other that the human being's natural instinct for intimacy and pleasure will be most visibly deformed. We are faced with the most seductive characters, placed at the service of attention, love, struggle and... everything.

⠀⠀⠀Pride’s passion for the sexual instinct manifests itself in a personality that is affectively labile and superficial, seductive and sexually provocative, almost always intoxicated with love, dazed and prone to illogical thoughts. Her rash behavior, impetuous ways create social problems and turbulent relationships. She is histrionic and hypomanic, with a tendency to be monotonous and frivolous, and capable of creating fantastic images that intrigue and seduce the naive.

⠀⠀⠀It is a character most often found in women. Attractive and dangerous, she dislikes the other and is expert at whetting the appetite in a way that embodies the archetype of the vampire or femme fatale, who feeds on it. She manifests many narcissistic personality traits.

⠀⠀⠀He is independent, although he puts a lot of energy into being perceived and recognized as a special person. And it is precisely this detail that reveals a deep dependence on the other, which he wants to hide. Dependence that leaves him trapped in the relationship, with the result that he is not free, despite his efforts to appear wild and autonomous.

⠀⠀⠀The origin lies in having been an eroticized girl (or boy) in the primary relationship with the mother or father. He received confusing attentions between affection and pleasure. Two dimensions are naturally linked in the child, but in the case of Two, this nature was diverted to eroticism due to the lack of clarity in the physical and affective contact with the parents. The girl, the boy, has thus learned that love passes through sexuality, and that provoking pleasure in the other is a privileged channel to get attention and, ultimately, to get love.

⠀⠀⠀In adulthood this channel is exclusive, with the consequence that one cannot distinguish between natural sexual desire and the need to have a loving contact. The sexual instinct takes over and leads the person to be a slave to the need to be desired in an exclusive way, often giving up or not knowing how to give adequate space to other satisfactions, such as being cared for or fulfilled in social, field, or professional life.

⠀⠀⠀ Sexual Two has the ability to make others feel at ease: they are generous, forgiving, and flattering; but they can also be uncompromising and dismissive when their pride is hurt. Hungry for intimacy, and always relationship-oriented, they are passionate and agreeable while the feeling lasts. They are also very sensitive, to the point of getting angry when they feel their pride is unrequited.

⠀⠀⠀They are endowed with a fascinating, often unconventional aura that they use a lot in their intimate relationships. They seek excitement, fall “madly in love” easily, and become fleetingly attached to one person or thing after another. They are vigorous, effervescent, lively, generally good-humored (though temperamental), active, and impulsively expressive. Very lively in their gestures but with touches of more or less marked shyness, and with a mimicry that is varied but not always decipherable by their changeable and ambivalent attitude.

⠀⠀⠀They neglect promises and break contracts. Without internal structure or self-discipline, they succumb to the temptation of new and exciting stimuli. 

As this woman recognizes:

“I want to be the best lover, the best friend, the most creative, the funniest...the best and the best for my partner. In return, I want you to give me everything. And everything is everything! That’s what makes me tick and gives meaning to my life. And as soon as I feel that he doesn't give me “everything”, I start questioning the relationship: “It’s not the same anymore.... It’s not like before”. I get hurt easily and distance myself. I blame the other for not being up to the task and walk away, certain that I will find other men who can give me what I deserve. In fact, I always have a secret agenda of possible candidates that I can call (use) to satisfy my inflated image of myself”. — ANONYMOUS

⠀⠀⠀Sexual E2 bases his strong relational drive on the need to become wanted through a generous giving and giving attitude, with the secret desire to make himself indispensable.

2. THE CHARACTERISTIC

NEUROTIC NEED

⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝⏝

⠀⠀⠀Seduction, the word that defines his passion, is, in sexual E2, the desperate attempt to fill the existential void by reaching an unreal love. The intrinsic belief is: “I am not wanted for who I am, I have to make myself wanted, I have to be irresistible, I have to unleash my weapons”. But the affective emptiness is not filled; nothing satisfies it. Hence the continuous search for more and more intensity. 

⠀⠀⠀The Sexual E2 uses seduction to the limit of its possibilities, and in both aspects of the secum ducere: moving toward the other in order to capture, by this passage, the other for himself. It sharpens your attention to every detail of the relationship so that you can understand whether you are loved, and how much, and whether you are considered special. He is always welcoming and forgiving, even when criticizing the recipient of his love (while knowing how to lash out when he wants to point out his detachment). Warm, humane, and enthusiastic, he enjoys each other’s company and is able to care for him to the point of anticipating his needs.

⠀⠀⠀However, he traps himself in the net of capture he weaves, to the point where he is unable to say no to those who show him their appreciation, ending up in relationships he did not choose.

⠀⠀⠀Tolerant to the point of self-denial, she makes a tenacious effort to realize her dream of love. But underneath is a great lack of modesty and a sense of superiority over her partner, who drinks of knowing how to meet her most regressive needs and the firm belief that he can satisfy (and even change) her more than anyone else.

⠀⠀⠀In fact, this sexual subtype is characterized by a deep conviction of being the ideal woman or man, the healer of the other’s wounds, or the inspirer of their creativity and success. It has difficulty realizing how demanding and full of mental reservations it is with others, and consequently how manipulative its warm welcome is, whose purpose is to arouse the other’s desire, to confirm “that one is loved unconditionally”.

“Being in a couple, I aspire to leave an indelible mark on their being. To be that special person who will be remembered with a smile and gratitude...forever. — I am fed up with seeing him happy and I get credit for that; « Thanks to me » I have a place in his soul that is eternal; I know (and he will realize too) that I was so special...” — ANONYMOUS.

“Secretly I am proud of his progress, he got it because he was with me, he “passed through my hands” and so are my results, and that is how I calculate. — May he recognize me for how important I was to him, unforgettable. Like in the song “Remember me”. Remember me when you sleep and I guess what you dream, when away from our bed it’s me you think of. Remember me when you look into the eyes of the past, when I no longer wake up in your arms. Remember me loving you, looking into your eyes, tying myself to your life. That my soul was tattooed on your skin”. — ANONYMOUS

⠀⠀⠀Fascinated by himself and by his supposed capacity to pour out rivers of love, this character claims to always know how to steal other people’s smiles, thus ensuring himself a reference image with traces of delight and voluptuousness, which will serve as fuel for his ever-increasing release of seduction.

⠀⠀⠀He seduces, yes, only those who deserve his attention, those worthy of interest. And to seduce, he flatters, lavishing excessive praise on the other so that the other will do the same, and reinforces his magnified image with flattery.

⠀⠀⠀On the contrary, he is particularly sensitive to humiliation, with frequent expressions of susceptibility if he receives a reproach. Instead of taking it with a constructive and sincere attitude, his pride is easily wounded by his claim to be exceptional. Then anger emerges in the foreground, expressed as a cynical contempt for someone who, at that moment, is not worthy of his attention.

⠀⠀⠀A specific way of seducing the E2 Sexual is abduction. The prey is separated from the rest when it falls into the spider’s webs, who neither eats it nor kills it, but entangles it with its thread, to which it remains attached, and leaves it there until it becomes interested, feeding it, with flattery, seducing it without surrendering to it, while it continues to weave its web for further conquests, but without leaving him.

⠀⠀⠀The predator seduces his victim by reducing her field of vision. He tries to manipulate her way of acting, thinking and feeling, so that she becomes someone to his measure, who meets his expectations, which is not to say that he wants a “coward”, who would no longer interest him. It is the ambivalence of, “Be as I want you to be and, at the same time, be yourself so that you can be worth me”.

⠀⠀⠀A Sexual E2 expands the nuances of seduction:

“I have a whole range of resources and ways that cover up the strategy of seduction, in a range from maximum self-confidence to sobriety.

My wound is: “Look at me... because I don’t feel seen... or even unloved". I sought my father’s gaze but experienced it sexualized and was ashamed to feel his pride in me. From then on, I activate my whole repertoire so that you look at me with very good eyes.

It is a constant and irrepressible search for love (in the form of being seen, accepted and valued in all its expressions). I try to attract your attention to me and be the center. The worst thing is to be invisible, or to feel “neutral”. I want to please, leaving an indelible and unique impression. To impress you.

Seduction involves my whole body, emotion and psyche, and comes automatically and naturally. There is a preference for pleasing the male, but I make no distinction and it is activated with women, children... even objects. Anything can be seduced; it can be put into action at any time.

The most important thing in my life is relationships, and I distinguish between seduction:

a) Specific. About someone specific that I find interesting and deserves my attention. I want to attract him to me, win him over, and activate passion (falling in love and falling for him). Here I put the point of view on the other person, on being interesting in his eyes; I feel passionate about the way he looks at me.

b) Indiscriminate. About anyone, as long as it feeds the image of myself, for my own passion. The reference point is feeling good and looking interesting in my eyes.

• They are usually fleeting contacts, where I use relationships to push myself.

• My letter of introduction is my smile, which is also my most expensive. Years ago, before these medical-aesthetic advances that exist now, I fantasized that the worst thing that could happen to me was that my front teeth (the ones I clean most carefully) would be missing.

• I show a smiling, sparkling, youthful, fresh image. Animation, enthusiasm, optimism, and fun; I constantly make little jokes.

• I sell a sense of freedom and security in myself.  Anti norms and welcoming.

• I offer: Attention, time, energy, sense of humor, critical sense, understanding, exclusivity, companionship, interest in you and your things (at least when I want it).

• I flatter with niceties.

• Welcoming, warm, friendly. I have a kind word for everyone, a complicit gesture, a personalized advice or message; I try to make you feel comfortable in short distances.

• Exquisitely detailed, meticulous in surprises and an excellent hostess, I entertain with gifts. I remember people’s names. I like my body, my attributes, move with grace and walk with ease, swaying, light hips and loose pelvis. Corporally attentive (with body slightly leaning forward, I nod continuously: I make sure I hear you), gesticulate and make faces and other comical gestures, with an open gaze; whistle and hum easily.

• On a mental level: loquaciousness, expressive ease, and relaxed, multifaceted conversation. I speak spontaneously.

• With an open, light, flexible, innocent (not standard or trendy), hippie, chic alternative appearance, my style is natural and I don’t need additives; just putting on some earrings already feels good.

According to a friend, whom I asked to describe me, my attractions are: smooth white skin, generous and healthy curves, I exude voluptuousness; clear and mischievously attractive eyes, hand gestures, body posture, self-confidence in speech and in boldness (I am driven and do not retreat, even if I do not know where I am stepping), curious and loving. My warrior attitude also stands out: with character, confrontational, non-conformist, free.

Another friend confessed to me that “there is nothing as seductive as half-veiled shame”, and I realized that even shame can be used as a seduction strategy. Examples:

With women: We were in a common training and we met the day before. I was very fond of her and she had to be away for a few days; I made a display of my charms by preparing for him varied and careful sandwiches for his trip, anticipating and facilitating the logistics. She was impressed with my predisposition; today we are great friends.

With psychopaths: My friend used to comment on her fear of meeting a possible psychopath. I, on the other hand, thought: “Total... He’s just a human”, relying on my personal skills and resources to dissuade him, even imagining that in five minutes of talking to me he would redeem himself (“psychopaths for me ...”). This same friend reminded me that she once found me in a cordial attitude with a girl, and when we said goodbye I told her “And the next time you see me ... don’t hold me back”. It seems that he approached me in an intimidating way to steal me away, and I redirected the situation with my seductive skills.

To this day I use “conscious seduction” in my work to relieve tension when conflict arises with angry users. I am very good. I always have under my hat some laughable or funny comment, flattery, jokes, and other niceties and courtesies to ease the tension, turning their anger into a smile.

With men: Either I put them on the pedestal, idealized, object of my desire, or they are underground and I write them off.

Mechanism of attraction: In the presence of a man who attracts me, I activate a “hunting” automatism. A radar points to him, and even if his back is turned or he is far away, there is a thread that connects, an energy that intertwines. It is an instinct where all my senses are activated, focus and emanate towards the person who is the object of my desire, who remains in my sights.

I follow his trail, like an animal on the prowl, with all my attention focused there, while I am doing other things (I don’t need to look directly at him); only I know, and I am extremely discreet when other people are around.

I want her to feel desire for contact with me: laughter, glances, irrepressible desire for romance and skin touch ...

When contact is established, I want to tighten the thread that keeps us close and I focus, receptive to any indicator, on that person exclusively; my whole life is focused on her. I try to anchor a powerful thread in your body that keeps me energetically united to you.

Example: We slept in adjoining rooms, although I hardly slept all night, between the summer heat and the heat of my body from the excitement of your presence. I felt a desire for contact; I liked him and his body. Two weeks later I was still torturing myself with the question: “Why didn’t I sleep with him?”

I want someone who loves me and is very available to me (gives me unlimited attention). As the song says, “I only want a little bit of your whole life”. I am intolerant of total lack of attention.

Example: Someone picks up the phone and looks at it while he is with me, or doesn’t look at me when I talk to him, or doesn't gesture confirming that he listens to me with interest.

But there is a fine line: if you are too available, I call you dependent, internally I disempower you and reject you. And if you don’t listen to me, or are not completely available, I act out my anger and question, disqualify, or despise you with invalidating comments, looking for your flaws; I can be very harsh and sharp. 

Example: He was aware of me, but he saw me as soft, “he pinched” me, he did what he wanted with me. I punished him by sleeping with his best friend, giving him the message: “I am not exclusive to you”. In another similar example, he showed no sexual interest in me, and I took it out on him by going out with his friend.

I have relentlessly sought the love of a partner, idealizing the man and the relationship. The feeling of falling in love is like gasoline; when I fall in love, I cling to the illusion of how wonderful, how ideal it will be. Being in a relationship: “With you I don’t need anything else, the whole world is this, this is now, this is you. And I make your life easier, supporting you in your projects in exchange for your constant signs and demonstrations that you are for me, because if not, I’ll demand them or I’ll end up looking for another offer”.

I am attracted to a man with power, but not so much that I can’t dominate (and manipulate) him a little. In a therapy session I came up with this pearl: If a man with power falls in love with me, “I have more power than the one with power. My power is that I dominate the man who has more power”.

Culturally, power is held by the man. For me, sex is the territory where I can exert control to feel power. I have used sex life as a bargaining chip and I act on hang-ups and “charge” them in bed, frustrating, if necessary, the man.

The man is also an object of desire. And through sexuality I feel loved. I want to feel desired, I am insecure about my desire and I can have difficulty connecting with it (I need the other to activate it).

Without my desire active, I can play the game of feeling used, but with the satisfaction of being the one providing the pleasure. I can also victimize myself and then experience the man as the enemy, the invader, whom I reject and blame as the aggressor and violent, defending the “no” of women, with the idea of “not selling ourselves to men”.

If I have my desire active, I compete for pleasure, adopting a more masculine role.

The pleasure of contact and intimacy are my weak point. The erotic anticipation of the encounter permeates my psyche. Eroticism and sensuality are at the service of seduction. Sexuality need not necessarily be my goal, even if there is sexual provocation and coquetry.

It has been relatively easy for me to cross the barrier of the complicity of friendship into something more intimate with my friends; going to bed has been a way to maintain the relationship”. — SONIA GOMA

⠀⠀⠀The person of this character, in fact, more than loving the other, loves herself as a lover, and love, the strong feeling of being in love. That, as long as the emotion is intense, because otherwise he doesn't know what emotion he feels.

⠀⠀⠀Seduction is natural to this subtype of Two in that it is based on its underlying ambivalence. It shows and hides, says “yes” and “no” at the same time, gives and takes, stays and takes, sucks and bites, loves and destroys. This is the ambiguity of seduction, where is rooted that fluctuation of attitudes, that fickleness and that sense of force emphatically to the point of inauthenticity, which emerge in E2 Sexual to testify to a defensive conflict. 

⠀⠀⠀And for the other ambivalence, in the pair of opposites activity/passivity. Of the three subtypes, only the two conservationists exhibit a certain passivity, through a more explicit dependence on meeting survival needs, while the other two seem more active and independent. But it is a mask. Below, both the social and, more radically, the sexual E2 are dependent on the gratifications they receive. And their own exhibitionism can be seen as an expression of this passivity rather than independence, of ambivalence.

⠀⠀⠀Moreover, in E2 Sexual, this activity/passivity polarity finds a further expression in the interaction of masculine/feminine. The woman of the sexual subtype, being feminine and receptive, is stimulated by the appropriation of freedom, which is socially more masculine, because she also does not tolerate too many limits. Often in her childhood history there is a model couple with markedly masculine-aggressive and feminine-passive or at least complacent poles.

⠀⠀⠀This type of couple relationship has survived in the psyche, along with a proud form of revenge against authority, which culturally tends to be male, and which it envies and rejects at the same time, with the usual ambivalence. She seems to like to give, but in reality demands to get, defying with her motto: « Si je t’aime, prend garde à tois » as fatal Carmen says. She has a sense of that subterranean hostility that she projects onto the object of her desire: a male to take and conquer. And she can compete with that male not only by assuming her aggressiveness disguised as female seduction (cultivating a kind of psychic androgyny), but also by seducing women, both in her search for an ideal partner and for the pleasure of testing this other aspect of sexuality in free and unconventional ways.

⠀⠀⠀Often, the E2 Sexual man also had parents in whom the polarity shown is expressed. As in the following example:

“My mother used to tell me that her husband was proud of her and put her on a pedestal after she achieved any of the titanic tasks he was so fond of imposing on her. But soon, since she was not a divine being and was failing at something, he threw her off. My father was like this: he wanted not only the most beautiful and desired woman, but also the strongest and most determined, infallible in his eyes. If not, he would punish her without talking to her for weeks on end”. — LUIS HERNÁNDEZ

⠀⠀⠀Sexual E2 may find that he envies and despises his two parents at the same time, because he has felt excluded. This painful experience may be expressed in childhood fantasies of not being his parents’ child, but adopted, secretly, or something similar.

⠀⠀⠀Through seduction, the sexual boy or girl has learned to get a place, an important place. This is not just a place in the other, but becomes a place in the world. The repeated compulsion to seduce is a call to be seen, to feel that you control relationships, to feel that you exist. Only with seduction do you know how to escape the humiliation of not being considered a person and the abyss of feeling a huge emptiness.

3. INTERPERSONAL STRATEGY AND

ASSOCIATED IRRATIONAL IDEAS

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⠀⠀⠀The cognitive world of Sexual E2 is distorted by a central idea of superabundance or false abundance (a name that defines the fixation common to all subtypes of Two), which supports the passionate feeling of superiority over others. There is an overvaluation and an interpretation of reality based on the belief of being able to give more than others, of being a “universal giver”, especially in the field of love, understanding, care, intimacy...

⠀⠀⠀This self-centered generosity is based on a maneuver to hide one’s own need, one’s own lack. It is always the other who lacks, and one has to give to the other. It is like being a mother to the poor children of the world, to the people in need. One sees himself in the other and gives to him: “I have more than enough and you are lacking, and so he covers his own lack with the other and with himself”.

⠀⠀⠀In this way, E2 disguises his need for love as a false abundance; his sadness, as joy; his lack of spontaneity, as impulsiveness; his repression, as freedom; his lack of respect for the other, as excessive attention and submission; and his lack of commitment translates into false promises.

⠀⠀⠀The interpersonal strategy of the sexual subtype of Two is therefore based on his own illusions about ways to satisfy his need for love. In their beliefs that:

• You have the right to get love by manipulating and seducing;

• You are exceptional and deserve it immediately;

• What you didn't get yesterday is due to you today;

• To arouse admiration means to receive love;

• Narcissistic self-sufficiency corresponds to real autonomy and freedom; he doesn’t need others so much;

• He is able to meet the needs of others and be indispensable;

• He is completely predisposed to relationship;

⠀⠀⠀Regarding this last belief, in reality, what he is is quite incapable of creating affective bonds. In fact, he seems to aspire to precisely what he is most terrified of: the love relationship, which cannot be fulfilled if one is not very capable of building bonds that tend toward everyday life and equality.

⠀⠀⠀And yet, your basic strategy is, as we know, seduction, due to the neurotic need to arouse desire in others. You know very well that in a world where erotic desire is “sold” on the market for personal success, it is a great strategy to be desired. And no matter how inwardly aware of self-deception he is, he cannot give up the secondary advantage of contact magic. His skills were honed over the years, but he forgot that it was a means and not an end in itself.

⠀⠀⠀The associated irrational ideas are “If they don’t want me intensely they don’t love me or I’m not worth it” and “If they don’t match me in everything, they don't love me or I'm not worth it”.

⠀⠀⠀As we have been saying, the generosity of Sexual E2 hides motivations that are not as virtuous as they may seem, because it is in the service of an ego of pseudo-superiority: “I have to give. When you think of himself, you see superabundance. And it continually offers its services to cover up your deep sense of not having and being powerless, of lack, of inconsistency”.

⠀⠀⠀The irrational ideas associated here are “If I show my need they won’t want me”, “If I show my lack they will realize I am worthless and abandon me” and “Elders give, they don’t show”.

⠀⠀⠀Another strategy, which belongs more to the conservationists, but is present in all E2 subtypes, is to appear as a good boy, a good girl. It’s a way of not getting into open conflict, of not confronting, a kind of implicit pact of non-aggression. Nobody wants to hurt a child, much less if he is good. This strategy stems from the children's learning to make themselves loved in this way, hiding the bad child. If the good child is what is socially accepted, the bad child is the one who has not hyperadapted to the desires of others, erasing his own. The good child doesn't want, or doesn't seem to want, or wants only “desirable things”. There, the bad boy is repressed in the shadow of the unconscious, along with his instinct.

⠀⠀⠀The associated irrational ideas are “If you are confrontational and show your anger, they won’t love you” and “If you show yourself as you are, they won’t love you.”

4. OTHER CHARACTERISTICS AND

PSYCHODYNAMIC CONSIDERATIONS

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⠀⠀⠀We have already dealt with seduction, false abundance, self-centered generosity, and denial of need. Let us now look at other traits that are part of E2 Sexual personality.

⠀⠀⠀Some of them stem from the difficulty of sustaining attacks on his idealized image. This person finds it difficult to admit her mistakes; she is grumpy to the point of intransigence and nosy when her pride is touched; and she can become despotic when she perceives that the other person escapes her.

◯   ◦ Aggressiveness

⠀⠀⠀Sexual Two has difficulty asking. He is unable to ask frankly for fear of appearing human and not divine, so he lets himself be manipulated or takes a demanding position. He pushes and invades, takes up more space than his own. And he adopts a posture of narcissistic flattery. The vital strategy he puts into play evokes obtaining a greater space of attention within his family of origin.

⠀⠀⠀He is impulsive and his motto is: « Make love and war ». When he goes for a goal he scrapes, he doesn't look around or know any better he signals his desires, which he confuses with his real needs. His aggressiveness is expressed in the form of impulse in action. Speak up. Buy with love or whatever it takes. He sets up scenes and, like E8, the end justifies the means, and the intensity of the action leads to emotional disconnection, which is why he is sometimes confused with the lascivious character. All this mechanism hides the difficulty of sustaining frustration, the limit, the “no” as an insurmountable barrier; a boundary that, by oversizing it, seems humiliating.

⠀⠀⠀The person of this character can become violent, brazen, and dismissive. In private, having reached a certain level of frustration, he reacts with indifference or leaves without much contemplation or suffering for a long time. Compensates for the loss immediately by seducing another candidate, thus covering up feelings of loss, frustration and pain.

⠀⠀⠀In this attitude it differs from Social E2, who expresses aggression in a more intellectual way, with arguments and explanations. And, above all, from conservation E2, where aggressiveness is hidden under a childish halo of tantrums and temper tantrums more than as explicit violence, and can also turn against itself, according to the gestalt mechanism of retroflexion. This is something we are unlikely to see in a Sexual E2, fully capable of releasing the full impulse.

◯   ◦ Hypersensitive

⠀⠀⠀Pride rests on a magnified self-image that sometimes needs to be defended to the world. When there is confrontation, criticism, or the slightest attack on this image, the pride reaction is immediate. The volume of the response has little to do with the stimulus, but is due to its hypersensitivity.

⠀⠀⠀When an arrow goes through the egoic defenses and directly hits the consciousness, revealing a lie or falsehood, the hyperreactivity explodes, ner. Before allowing himself to be hurt, before recognizing this truth, he would dismantle his egoic construct, before the slightest scratch on his self-image, in an automatic impulse he defends himself by attacking. Pride is said to be an “easy to hurt” emotional state. It is simply the reaction to an old and primary humiliation that hurt him as a child and left him unable to distinguish between having boundaries, being criticized, and being humiliated.

⠀⠀⠀The “thin skin” may or may not be conscious, depending on the degree of maturity. But what differentiates Sexual E2 from the other subtypes is the “spontaneous” compulsiveness of the reaction, this automatism of maximum “freedom of expression” of the impulse.

◯   ◦ Idolater of Desire

⠀⠀⠀The passion of E2 Sexual is to feel passion. Passion to be dragged and swept along in the intensity of an idealized, generalized love. Living the drive gives it meaning and strength, so that it is difficult to give up any desire or to postpone it, especially that of love. Desire becomes an uninhibited drive that seeks immediate gratification, with whatever manipulative strategies are necessary. Thus, it is invasive, fickle and impatient, chasing what it does not yet have but believes it deserves.

⠀⠀⠀The most important desire is the desire to be loved and satisfied, to be special in love. It is difficult for an E2 Sexual to accept that what he needs most is what he is least willing to give. What you need is to learn to love. Well, your difficulty lies in loving, committed and deep dedication.

⠀⠀⠀Look for a kind of love that meets a neurotic need that can never be satisfied. What he lacks is what he is looking for now he enters unconsciously, and does so by repeating a deficient form of love based on seduction and the place it gave him by his parents and in his family. The driving force is to fill the void, that painful feeling that tells you that not everything is so great or so loving, that borders on envy and puts the entire egoic structure at risk.

◯   ◦ Impulsive and Without Limits

⠀⠀⠀Someone so wild and impulsive needs freedom. There is a lack of limits, a pleasure in transgressing the rules, in the name of feeling more than thinking. As a Sexual E2 says: “For me, slogans are just guidelines”.

⠀⠀⠀There is in this character a phobia of feeling the limits imposed from the outside. His dependence on the emotional state of the moment gives him an air of freedom that can be mistaken for true spontaneity and that, in reality, responds to a difficulty in giving up the immediate gratification of the impulse. This is why it seems incongruous and irresponsible.

The E2 Sexual is already accustomed since childhood to getting what he wants, as an echo of the Oedipal situation in which he reached a place of intimacy with the opposite sex parent. A place that did not belong to him and that he achieved through seduction — ambiguously induced by that same parent —, while displacing the same-sex parent, with whom he usually maintains a conflictive relationship.

⠀⠀⠀He is the wildest and freest of the Two. Much more than the conservative E2, without going any further, who adopts a childish posture by giving up much of his freedom to obtain the privilege of his parents, and has to be more of a good boy or a good girl, which entails a greater loss of his free and spontaneous impulse.

⠀⠀⠀Freedom, or rather feeling “free” is related to this lack of limits that were never placed on him, or that came from an excessive authority that he seduced to overcome his fear of being crushed, of death.

◯   ◦ Dependent

⠀⠀⠀Apparently independent, he flags a freedom that he mistakes for debauchery. But in reality, he is a hidden and disguised dependent; with an indescribable dependence on himself because he would break his idealized image. He needs the other to confirm him. And also that contact, affective and carnal, where he gets what he wants.

⠀⠀⠀In denying the lack, the person’s reason for going to therapy is usually a couple crisis, when he feels abandoned and the building that supports his pride crumbles.

◯   ◦ Histrionic

⠀⠀⠀Nowadays the word “ histrionic” is used to define the whole emotional staging of the E2 character, and especially the E2 Sexual, who specializes in dramatizing emotions. He is also called “hysterical”, in the sense of intensely emotional and impulsive: the emotional is far ahead of the rational, and he tends to “emotional outbursts”, but histrionic is more precise and refers to his theatricality.

⠀⠀⠀This emotional staging may have nothing to do with his deep motivations. It is just a performance to achieve something else, while hiding the real need that triggered the energetic mobilization. It is often unconscious, because every motivation or feeling has to do with an aspect of deficiency, something that does not fit into their expanded self-image, so it is relegated to the unconscious through the main mechanism of E2: Repression. Although staging is typical of the Two in general, the theatrical, expansive and aggressive capacity of the Sexual E2 makes it the most outrageous and brazen subtype.

⠀⠀⠀Histrionism is therefore, in E2 Sexual, particularly evident. The more prisoner of his character's armor, the better actor specializing in expressing affection in its different declinations. He differs from the conservative and social ones by the more free and unashamed expression of passion. He can give himself so much to his effusions that he lacks the words to express everything he feels, and his eyes, hands, or whole body are not enough to communicate his feeling: he wants to cross the other with his voice, his look, and with his fire of passion.

⠀⠀⠀The most impetuous personalities are even more capable of expressing anger and struggle, in an emotional catharsis like the one experienced by the actor in the climactic scene. In seduction, they can reach the highest levels of creativity and expressive richness: feline rhythm, a submissive gaze that wants to penetrate the other, a mixture of sweetness and strength, warmth and instinct, great freedom in physical contact, a natural uninhibition to show themselves naked, and all those expressions of eroticism that give them enormous pleasure.

◯   ◦ Rebellious and Transgressive

⠀⠀⠀E2 experiences the painful feeling of being a fraudster, which makes him feel false and therefore guilty. One outlet is disinhibition and transgression of social rules, not as a result of real autonomy of judgment and action, but as an expression of the neurotic need to stand out, to gain the admiration of others, to arouse their interest.

⠀⠀⠀The sexual subtype takes him into the field of erotic-affective relationships, even triangular ones. He sees himself as the repository of new social rules through sexual freedom, with a demonstration of vitality and a feeling of superiority over the more common relationship bonds.

⠀⠀⠀It is not difficult for the E2 Sexual to advocate triumphs of the libido, even provocatively and scandalously to common sense, as a form of narcissistic self-satisfaction.

⠀⠀⠀He needs to feel exalted by relationships where he imagines himself at the center of the other’s desires, and intensely affective, without which he would feel barren, empty, threatened by isolation, and dangerously sad. All this with the fantasy that it is others who need his generous welcome, when in reality it is he who needs to feel continually reassured about his worth.

◯   ◦ Hedonist

⠀⠀⠀The E2 Sexual is hedonistic; his pursuit of pleasure is in the service of escaping pain and any situation that potentially carries a frustration that he cannot tolerate. How can anyone say no to you? Or not respond to his need to be adored! 

⠀⠀⠀By not facing the limit, he can entangle the other in a persistent promise of pleasure. These seduction games satisfy both Sexual E2 hedonism and his need to break routine with new experiences. As Claudio Naranjo points out, the desire for pleasure can be considered a substitute for it; and E2, so in need of eliminating from his life all that is problematic, troubling, or unsatisfying, seeks it through love. His low tolerance for frustration, when he doesn't feel loved, leads him to states of anger or agitation that, in turn, serve to break the dreaded routine.

⠀⠀⠀Hedonism makes him a consumer of relationships and objects, as he surrenders to his intense desire to give and obtain pleasure.

◯   ◦ Idealized Self-image

⠀⠀⠀The sexual E2 is a grandiose and inflated self-image. Radiant and magnificent in fantasy, it is not grounded in reality by fact. It is a dream, but a contagious dream that convinces not only oneself, but also others. It is different from the narcissism of the E3, whose image selling is backed by titles, by a schedule full of specific things to do, by hours in the gym, by a large closet, or by disproportionate spending on cosmetics or cosmetic surgery.

⠀⠀⠀The image of a vampire, a Femme Fatale, who needs to be loved and attracted, is the compensatory ideal for a childhood wound. And the energy invested in not crumbling this idealized image is what causes a disconnect from the depths of her being. 

⠀⠀⠀It is a theatrical image, a staging with all the attributes of a lie, made up of intimate music in the tone of voice, provocation in the seductive gestures and clothing, and an ability to look suspiciously as exaggerated.

◯   ◦ Inconsequential

⠀⠀⠀In this discrepancy between reality and self-image, the E2 Sexual imagines himself to be bigger, more generous and more helpful than he is.

⠀⠀⠀He lives too much in the present to remember what he promised the day before yesterday. He tells you: « I will help you » with such and such a thing. Or: « You know that you can count on me ». Or: « I will support you in everything you do ». But when the time comes, the promise doesn't translate into concrete things. It is more a feeling that existed at that moment, the result of an emotionalized impulse that is holding an image. And when the time comes, it's not so much the service rendered.

◯   ◦ Universal Donor

⠀⠀⠀Someone who feels so superior to others believes that he has much to give in every way. One who continuously runs away from pain and seeks pleasure through love cannot show that precisely this, love, he does not have. On the contrary, he shows himself to be a great giver of love.

⠀⠀⠀Given or sense of superiority of the proud, his high principles about life, love and relationships lead him to see himself as a moral marvel, then he stops taking into account the consequences of his actions and how he is reality.

⠀⠀⠀But how does he turn his need for love into the ability to give love? Says psychoanalyst Karen Horney:

⠀⠀⠀His need to be proud of himself is so imperative that he cannot tolerate the idea of being in the grip of his own needs; so he uses his imagination to transform his needs into virtues, to turn them into qualities to be proud of. But only the compulsive needs that serve his tendency to make his idealized image come true undergo such a transformation.

⠀⠀⠀In structuring himself as a character, his need for affection and to feel himself the center is transformed into giving love, into caring. And in all this giving, one thought never leaves him: he expects others to recognize what he does for them. In his aggrandizement, he puts his attention on what he is doing for the other more than on what he will receive. It’s a continuous effort to be seen by others, and with such a high self-esteem that the recognition they expect never comes, which guarantees persistent frustration.

⠀⠀⠀This effort is a characteristic of E2 Sexual, which contributes to his being able to walk with his head held high, thus evoking the subterranean idea of undeserving from his humiliated inner counterpart.

◯   ◦ Anti-intellectual

⠀⠀⠀Sexual E2 is the most emotional. Sexual E4, also a specialist in dramatic and intense emotional manifestations, has, however, a more intellectual component, because to exercise competence he needs argumentation. In Sexual Two, the undisputable argument is his emotion: things are a certain way “Because I feel that way”. This is his assertiveness, based more on his feelings than on the cognitive and which, in his uninhibited drive, gives him a false sense of security and the arrogance of achieving everything.

⠀⠀⠀His reading of reality is based, therefore, more on feelings than on the objective view of facts; emotion contaminates everything in the present moment, and in the name of emotion anything goes. He passionately identifies with emotion and is disinterested in the logical and structured world of thought, which seems heavy and dry to him.

⠀⠀⠀Cognitive or intellectual ability is devalued in all Two. True, somewhat less so in the Social E2s, who create an image of being responsible, serious and hyper-adult. Conservationists, closely identified with basic needs, are the most interested in concrete action to get what they need. Sexual E2 also feels more than he thinks, and values the emotional and sentimental world much more than the cognitive. An attitude that is at the origin of their main defense mechanism: repression.

◯   ◦ Competitive

⠀⠀⠀The field of competition for the sexual Two is above all the sentimental relationship. Your struggle to feel unique and unforgettable becomes difficult the moment a third party comes along and can overshadow you. In that case, you can return to a passionate and passionate energy, even if it is little or unclear whether you really care about the object you compete for. Nor do you wonder if you are really interested in that lover or friend, because your interest is in beating the competitor to feel the best in whoever's eyes. He feels your passion again and believes it, but once the prize is won, it may no longer have any value.

◯   ◦ Unconventional

⠀⠀⠀E2 Sexual gestures are open, informal and relaxed. He seems spontaneous and loose, feels at home everywhere, and takes up space by breaking in. Being unconventional is his characteristic, both in dress and behavior, as he breaks with schemes, being different from others at all costs. He is capable of doing in public what others would do only in private, such as taking off his shoes, putting his feet up on the sofa, showing a scar on his private part, sleeping in the middle of a meeting or something similar, going beyond social conventions. He wants to do what he wants “where he wants, with whom a tease gives me so much, sweetened by his seductive strategies and he wins”. It’s because of the fear of being rejected.

◯   ◦ From Erotic Movements

⠀⠀⠀The body of the proud personality was described by Wilhelm Reich, in Character Analysis:

“Its most striking characteristic is overt sexual behavior, combined with a specific type of bodily agility tinged with a definitely sexual tone. [...] In the typical case, the movements are smooth and sexually provocative. The overall impression is one of easy excitability”.

⠀⠀⠀The body movement of the Sexual E2 is to speak of the graceful and sensual movements of a body with few deep muscle blocks. Its body structure is well energized and shapes well-proportioned and harmonious bodies. It feels integrated and connected, conveying a sense of activity, aliveness, and agility.

⠀⠀⠀The energy reaches the most distal parts of the body, giving the skin a warm, rosy appearance. The bright, lively gaze denotes the emotional state the person is in, a trait shared with the other rigid characters of the bioenergetic classification.

⠀⠀⠀This body defense mechanism is triggered before the imminent appearance of distress, as this woman reports:

“I couldn’t stop moving, I felt an energy that went through my whole body, it carried me, moved me without going anywhere if I was a caged animal, my mother told me she was hysterical, but I couldn't do anything. When I stopped I felt a strong emotion in my chest, a very unpleasant feeling, and I started to cry inconsolably”. — ANONYMOUS

⠀⠀⠀We see in the statement how the failure of muscular defense makes the anguish appear and, in this case, the retained emotion that makes it sustain itself. This effective drain means that the E2, and especially the Sexual E2, rarely overcomes the anxiety. This is converted into smooth, undulating movements, charged with eroticism and which often confuse the interlocutor, who receives a double message: on the one hand, of provocation; on the other, not being responsible for the intentionality of the movement, which is removed from consciousness by the psychic defense mechanism of the repress. 

⠀⠀⠀Its erotic and seductive movement provokes sexual reactions when in reality this is not its function.

⠀⠀⠀This sensual and undulating movement, provided by the muscular defense of the “chain mail”, allows us to establish a differential diagnosis with other characters that do not possess such representative agility and mobility. 

◯   ◦ Apparently loose Hips

⠀⠀⠀Juanjo Albert says, speaking of the hysterical character (eneatype Two): « The defensive function of the erotic pseudocontact and genital sexuality is realized through its specialization and training to detect the risk of commitment and emotional surrender, and withdraw immediately when this happens ».

⠀⠀⠀The most extreme form of an E2 Sexual march is the spitting image of the vamp, whose seduction is conveyed not only by her sinuous and exaggerated movements, but also by the tone of her voice, the emphasis of her phrasing, her captivating gaze, her expressed voluptuousness, and the swaying of her hips, which suggests a promise of assurance.

⠀⠀⠀This typical contouring, as well as the retracted hip position, may signify health and connection to sexuality, but in reality it does not. The “charging pelvis” of two is energetically ready to express its force through orgasm, but unloading movements are limited by its rigidity, with reduced anterior pelvic displacement.

◯   ◦ Joyful

⠀⠀⠀Compared to the other subtypes of pride passion, the sexual displays a look of contentment and expansive joy. There it differs from the social E2, whose expression is less static, a bit more serious and rigid, due to the feeling of importance that invades it.

⠀⠀⠀This same joy and smile of the Sexual E2 is accompanied, in the conservation subtype, by a boyish look and face, which often makes him look younger than he is.

◯   ◦ The Spender

⠀⠀⠀Money gives this character crucial autonomy. Here too, the E2 Sexual depends on his own resources: showing his economic needs humiliates him, and his independence is more a gesture of pride than of inner freedom.

⠀⠀⠀Economic resources are subordinated to emotional ones and the need for intimate contact. E2 Sexual shows disregard for saving or possessing possessions. It may have to do with a basic arrogance and the need for immediate satisfaction in the intensity of the moment. Therefore, he tends to spend what he earns, but more on others than on himself.

⠀⠀⠀Carelessness can lead to not managing money, not checking your accounts, not knowing how much you earn, or not paying off loans.

⠀⠀⠀The power that Sexual E2 entrusts to money is therefore to be in the service of meaningful relationships, to receive affection and admiration in return. The way to obtain them ranges from generously offering his children's wishes to giving wonderful gifts to his partner or friends, and thus feeling good and making the other feel like the center of his attention. He even puts his own survival at risk by following a romantic ideal of generosity, which takes precedence over any other consideration.

⠀⠀⠀Because of his hunger for love, the E2 Sexual takes more pleasure in giving and spending than in withholding or possessing. For him, the pride of “giving” is an overcompensation of lack, of the painful feeling of worthlessness. This is what leads him to exaggerate. Under the mask of abundance, the counterpart of the miserable beggar manifests itself through the phantom of the fall. It is precisely this opposite that leads to excessive self-denial: if he does not feel that he deserves love for himself, he makes sure that he at least deserves it for services rendered. 

◯   ◦ Fear of Failure

⠀⠀⠀In his relationship dynamics, where he is the giver rather than the receiver, Sexual E2 finds it hard to imagine that someone else could take care of him if needed. Of his pride he can demand, but not ask, because a refusal would do him great harm. This, along with the need for freedom and autonomy, fosters the ghost of failure, because unable to give, they will have no place in the world, they imagine that if they are unable to give, they will have no place, they will be alone.