Jack: Oh, hi. I'm Jack. You can find me on Cohost at @JDQ, and you can buy any of the music featured on the show at notquitereal.bandcamp.com. Keith. Wait, no, Janine, it's your turn again.

Janine: [chuckling] You can find Keith at, uh... you're, wait, you're @Keithjcarberry on Twitter, right? Or — right?

Keith: Mm-hm. Yep. Yep.

Janine: Okay. Okay. You changed, and I still sometimes am living in 2014.

Keith: Oh yeah, I'm — if, yeah, you're listening to this 10 years ago —

Jack: What was he originally?

Keith: You can find me @somethingdumb.

Janine: [laughing]

Jack: Shit, that was 10 years ago? No.

Keith: Yeah, basically. Maybe 9.

Jack: Do you use somethingdumb for anything anymore? I feel like in my head that's still fully —

Keith: No. [chuckling]

Janine: No, don't, don't do [chuckling] let's not —

Keith: In like 2017 or something, I changed my... maybe 2018, I changed my, uh, uh, oh. I use it on steam, uh, but I changed my gamer tag from somethingdumb to something else like 5 years ago. That was the last thing that I actually —

Janine: It's somethingelse? Your, you're called something —

Keith: No, it's not. It is not somethingdumb.

Ali: [giggling]

Keith: But I don't use Steam, so I don't consider it something that counts. But technically, my name is still somethingdumb there.

Jack: I have a question about a recent username change for you, actually, Keith.

Keith: Oh, okay. Yeah.

Jack: Recently, you, you had a sort of Snufkin rebrand —

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: On Twitter.

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: Has, have you found that that has carried through into other aspects of your life? Or are you mostly just Snufkin-pilled on Twitter?

Keith: Uh, well, I think that the, the, the thing that happened to me, was that I found the name for the thing that I already was, which was Snufkincore.

Jack: Oh, I see. [chuckles]

Janine: Oh yeah.

Keith: That already was a part of me. I just didn't know that, that there was a name for it.

Jack: Smoking a little pipe, having a little, a little whittling knife, being a little roustabout.

Keith: Yes, yeah. Extreme — I, I hope to bring a bit of roustabout, about.

Jack: Yeah. Fair enough.

Janine: Sick. So, we are, for people who don't know, some of the people who do Friends at the Table. And we're here or a live game, a continuation of this, in a sense, a spiritual continuation, of a live game that we did in 2018, which I don't like to think about, because it was many years ago. Uh... I. Just. It was very long ago. So we're going to do this, it was actually a reward for, uh, a, the fundraiser we did last July. I forget what tier it was.

Ali: Yeah, thanks — thanks, everybody, for helping us support the National Network of Abortion Funds.

Janine: Mm-hm.

Keith: It was a really high tier, is what it was.

Ali: [giggling]

Janine: Yeah. We're still getting through that stuff, but also, I — we are dedicated to doing it.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Keith: All the stuff that's left is excellent, too. So, it's not —

Janine: That's the, that's what I was going to say, is like, a lot of the stuff that we are, that is left is stuff that we're like, super excited about. So like, you know.

Keith: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, we did all the easy stuff, and now everything that's left is like, the really awesome stuff that takes some effort.

Janine: Mm-hm.

Ali: Mm-hm. Including this.

Keith: Including this.

Janine: Yeah.

Ali: [chuckling] Does anybody want to talk about their experience with revisiting the... the original Bluff City Zoo to prepare for this?

Jack: [chuckles]

Keith: Uh, that episode’s —

Janine: I didn't get to listen to most of it, so I think Keith, I would love to hear your thoughts.

Ali: [giggling]

Keith: This episode's hilarious. This holds up. The worst thing about it, I wish that the audio quality was a little better, uh, I don't know what was happening with the mics this day.

Janine: You, we must have been on like old microphones or something, right?

Keith: We were on old microphones, but I sound like — I don't know who was hosting, I think Jack was streaming. But I, in my memory, I was streaming, but I, it couldn't have been, because I sounded the worst. Uh, so I think it was just like an internet of things issue, wherefore some reason the connection was weird, and I sounded bad. Uh, uh, —

Janine: It was being routed through Jack's fridge.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Keith: Yeah, it was being routed through the fridge.

Janine: It was an internet of things issue.

Keith: Yeah.

Ali: Also, it was going under the ocean.

Keith: It was, at the time, going under the ocean.

Jack: Right. Right.

Janine: Yeah.

Keith: Yeah. That's a long way to go.

Jack: Where the sharks are.

Janine: The sounds we were making were going under whales.

Ali: [giggling]

Janine: Think about that.

Keith: Uh, and yeah, the — Potatonaut says, “Shoutout to the FATT wiki editors, clutch plot synopsis for catching up.” What a... uh, absolutely thorough —

Janine: Oh my god, yeah.

Ali: Thorough [laughing]

Keith: Plot synopsis, which I was reading alongside listening.

Janine: Unbelievable.

Keith: It was so good. Uh, this episode's hilarious.

Janine: Scholarly-tier.

Keith: It super holds up, uh, it's super funny, uh, I love Fiasco. This is the first time, it was kind of wild listening to me play Fiasco for the first time, a game that now I consider probably my favorite tabletop game. Uh, I don't think that there's ever a time that I wouldn't play Fiasco. Uh, so, it's funny, I don't think — I can't even imagine that this is the first time I've played it, because I think that everyone else had played it a couple times. Just for Friends at the Table at that point, let alone if anyone else had played it for whatever personal life thing.

Jack: Yeah, I, uh, I... I didn't listen to the episode. And I skim-read bits of the, uh, the, the wiki synopses, which felt like a fever dream. But the episode itself felt like a fever dream to make. I have this like, very distinct memory of being like, whole-body tired. Head tired, body tired, just like, I don't understand what is happening in the world.

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: Knees weak, palms sweaty.

Jack: Yeah, knees weak, palms sweaty. I'm being attacked by a lion. Uh...

Janine: Zoo spaghetti.

Jack: Zoo spaghetti. That's, depending on the zoo... it, it's variable quality of spaghetti.

Janine: [chuckling]

Jack: And so, my prep for this episode was, uh, rereading Fiasco to make sure I remembered how to play Fiasco. Uh, which is kind of one of those things that I thought to myself, and I don't know if y'all had a similar experience, I, like — a few days ago I was like, “I know how to play Fiasco. You play Fiasco by... hm.” And then I had to get the book out to be like, “All right, what is actually involved?” Uh...

Keith: Well the funny thing about Fiasco is, there's a couple fiddly rules, but other than that, there's almost no structure to it [chuckling] —

Jack: Yeah.

Janine: Yeah. Every, every time I've sat down to play Fiasco, I've said, “I have no idea how to play Fiasco.” And I've played it, I want to say at least 3 times now. Once again, I am sitting down saying, “I have no idea how to play Fiasco,” but it just, it all, it all works.

Keith: Yeah.

Janine: It all just always works out. So...

Keith: Fiasco sort of plays itself by sort of rolling dice in the background while you do scenes.

Janine: Yes.

Keith: Because it really is like —

Jack: Yeah.

Keith: At the very beginning you set up with the dice, and then you just take your turns, you hand out dice, and at the end and in the middle you count them up for some reason, and the game spits out the way that you lose.

Jack: Yeah, pretty much. Fiasco was the first tabletop game I knew existed outside of Dungeons and Dragons.

Keith: Wow.

Janine: Wow.

Ali: Wow.

Jack: I was excited to play Fiasco, I think probably from its initial release in, god, when it Fiasco initially come out? 2009. Uh, and yeah, I, this was like the game that made me go, oh, there are games — tabletop games are a thing, outside of like, dungeons and dragons. So I've, I've always really loved, uh, really loved Fiasco, and I'm so excited to get back to it. Uh, and now it's... 4:30 instead of like 11:30 PM, so —

Ali: [giggling]

Janine: [chuckles]

Jack: I'm excited to see what it's like when I'm like, cogent.

Janine: All right, have we —

Keith: Uh, do you know if there's a Fiasco second edition?

Jack: Mm-hm.

Keith: Is it —

Jack: Is this the one with the cards?

Keith: Yes. Oh, I do now remember the cards. Yes, I know about the cards.

Jack: It's really interesting.

Keith: Okay.

Jack: And it is a really neat adaptation of Fiasco that is so much about, uh, what it actually feels like is when game developers are like, “Yeah, we completely rewrote the engine, and from your perspective, the game will basically be the same, but will move a little smoother.” Uh, like playing Fiasco with cards —

Keith: Okay.

Jack: Feels functionally the same as playing Fiasco, uh, originally. And it's a really interesting sort of adaptive project.

Keith: Okay.

Jack: But today we're playing Fiasco, original. Fiasco original.

Janine: Yeah. And we're, we're returning to the Zoo playset.

Keith: Yeah.

Ali: Yeah!

Jack: Yeah.

Janine: I'm going to switch us over, then.

Jack: We had some talks about, about what playset to choose, about whether we would like to pick up a new playset. And we looked through a bunch of different options. But ultimately, I think we returned to the zoo for, for a couple of reasons. First is, there's a lot in that playset that is aligned with the kind of story that we want to tell, that we're interested in telling. Uh, and the second thing is that, uh, I don't know if we've ever gone back to a playset with Fiasco. The playsets aren't really built to be things that you only play once, you know. A playbook should support a bunch of different, uh, adventures.

Janine: Mm-hm.

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: And it was interesting to me, at least, to be like, “All right, let's test that. Let's, let's go back to the well that we've been before and see what nightmares the bucket drags up this time.”

Ali: [chuckles]

Keith: This playset, by the way, by Will Hindmarch. I don't know if we said already.

Jack: Uh, I don't think we did. And Fiasco is by Jason Morningstar. I want to see, does Fiasco have another... author credited on it? Nope, it's by Jason Morningstar, independently published by Bully Pulpit.

Keith: Oh, I should, I should be in —

Janine: Okay.

Keith: I should be in Roll20. Why am I not in Roll20 yet?

Ali: I just opened Roll20, so we're here, we're here together.

Janine: That's a good question. I have a... fresh but also familiar Roll20 for us. It's slightly different.

Keith: Yeah, I remember last time, the cards in the dirt.

Janine: It's different, it's slightly different dirt. It's from the same different set, but it's slightly different dirt.

Keith: [laughs]

Ali: [giggling]

Keith: Oh, this is very nostalgic dirt for me.

Jack: Oh, I'm glad —

Janine: Yeah.

Jack: Ali, sorry, Janine, I don't think we're on the Roll20 on the fresh version. I can still see all our old characters, which, to me, feels very nostalgic. But...

Janine: Uh, we have to — oh, I didn't move the players, hang on. How do I move players to... thing? Options? No, I click — do I click and drag? It's been so long since I've done anything even a little bit — there we go — GM-y on Roll20.

Keith: Here we go.

Jack: Beautiful.

Janine: Let's zoo. See, the dirt's got — it's different, it's a little different. [chuckles]

Ali: Oh...

Keith: Mmm. Okay. Yes. Now we're playing.

Janine: I really appreciate that, Ali. [chuckles]

Keith: [laughing] Dirt reveal.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: Yeah, we were looking at the old. It's been —

Janine: [exaggerating Ali's reaction] Ohhhh...

Ali: [cackling]

Keith: It's been —

Ali: It's different!

Keith: And hey, we can move the, we can move the dice right away this time, which is a huge step up from the last time.

Janine: Yeah, I just kept that stuff the way it was. [chuckling]

Keith: I was looking at the old dirt, being like, “This is the new dirt.” Because it had been 5 years, I forget what the dirt was.

Janine: [laughing] You forgot the dirt? That's fair.

Keith: But now I'm seeing that this dirt has more dirt in between the twigs. Still a very nostalgic dirt.

Janine: Mm-hm.

Keith: This is what the dirt looked like where I grew up.

Jack: Really?

Janine: Oh.

Keith: Yeah. Lots of twigs. I lived in the forest.

Janine: Mmm.

Jack: You lived in the woods, the snuffkin?

Keith: Yeah. This is real — I did live in the woods, for real.

Jack: I lived at the bottom of a hill that cows grazed on. So the dirt for me was much more grass dirt. And less twig dirt.

Keith: Well, we have a lot of that, too, because we had cows, we had cows in the — where there weren't trees, there were cows.

Ali: Mmm.

Jack: Where there weren't trees, there were cows: the American —

Keith: This is, this is my —

Jack: The Horrid American Project.

Keith: This is the title of my autobiography. I'm writing an — I figure, I've had enough life.

Ali: [chuckling]

Keith: [laughs]

Jack: That's not true, Keith. All right, I mean, I can't speak for you, but... we got a zoo game to make.

Keith: Oh, okay.

Jack: Uh... is there anything we want to talk about before we begin? I... there was something that... I, I — we have one too many dice. And the distribution of these dice is awry.

Janine: Is that true?

Jack: We should have four dice per player, two white and two black. And here, I think we have 17 dice, instead of...

Keith: I think I have one extra white die.

Jack: 16.

Keith: Oh, and actually, I did, I did listen to a part of the last game, wherefore some reason, Janine, you had to make another die. So maybe that's why there's an extra die.

Janine: Right, and one of them was like, was like messed up or something, maybe?

Keith: Yeah.

Janine: There was one like, off to one side, and I was like, “Oh, this must be a mistake” — and then I put it in the middle.

Keith: So we have multiple extra — oh, no, no, no. I'm just miscounting. Just one extra one.

Janine: Okay, so I'm just going to... get rid of that.

Jack: Oop, there it goes.

Janine: And now I did.

Jack: I'm so glad this mystery was solved, because I couldn't figure out why there was one additional one. And now we know.

Keith: Yeah.

Janine: Yeah. All right, Jack, do you want to facilitate us in this, uh...

Jack: Okay.

Janine: With, with the rules, since you have that little quick sheet?

Jack: Yeah, uh, I was reading through Fiasco this morning in prep, but the book is so nice and so clearly written, but I also printed out a cheat sheet that was made by Marco Mandy on reddit. It's extremely useful. Uh, shortly after printing this cheat sheet out, I discovered there was a cheat sheet in the book as well, so I screwed up the first cheat sheet into a ball and put it in the recycling and printed out a second cheat sheet. Then I learned that the official cheat sheet is not as good as the one that I had just put in my recycling, so I un-screwed it up, and now I have both on my desk, but one of them looks like it's been in my recycling. Uh, perhaps the way to begin, though, is to talk about, is to, is to speak from the book talking about Fiasco.

Uh, I want to see where... where we should begin... so, we are playing Fiasco with a playset. This is the zoo playset by, uh, Will Hindmarch, did you say? Yes, Will Hindmarch. Uh, and in the original book, uh, Jason Morningstar says, “The playset is Fiasco's core. From it, you'll draw situation, characters, and inspiration. Think of playlists like trouble construction kits. You've got big lists of cool stuff, and each will have a flavor unique to its time and place.” And part of why Fiasco is so fascinating is that, in additional to all of the playsets that, uh, Jason Morningstar and his team have made, uh, there are tons of playsets online for all kinds of different things. We had stuff in your Google Drive about like, a Fiasco playset about traveling preachers in the early 20th century, which is so exciting. I had not seen that one before. Uh, when I was looking, there's a Fiasco about being [chuckles] about being Santa. You could, you could really go wild. Uh, but we have chosen a playset, uh, and we are going to, uh, begin by rolling some dice in the middle of the table, 4 per player, 2 black and 2 white. Uh, we'll be rolling 16 dice, and they'll be evenly split. It doesn't matter who rolls, just make sure you start the setup with a nice, random assortment of numbers.

Have we made this roll? Are these dice rolled?

Janine: No, they are unrolled.

Jack: Okay.

Ali: Mmm.

Jack: Should I — uh, who's going to do the honors?

Ali: Can I —

Janine: I can — sure, yeah. I don't remember how.

Ali: [giggles] Yeah, also — wait, you left-click them, right?

Keith: You can select them all —

Janine: Oh, I think you right-click — you can't, if you select them all you can't —

Ali: I've selected them.

Janine: You can't multi-sided, oh, wait, yeah you can. Or, no, you can't?

Ali: Yeah, left-click isn't letting me...

Janine: No, it's right-click for sure. I think you have to do them each individually.

Ali: No way. No, that's —

Janine: Right-click multi-sided, random side.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: That cannot be right.

Ali: I've, I, I know that I've rolled more than one dice in Roll20 before.

Janine: That's how we did did before. I wonder...

Ali: Oh.

Keith: Yep, it works. You just do them all. It does sort of put a little thing over one, but if you select them all, right-click and then do it, it does randomize them.

Janine: Oh, okay. It wasn't offering me that as a thing when I was right-clicking.

Keith: It doesn't say to do them all, but if you select them all first with a drag, it works, even though it looks like it's not going to work.

Ali: Mmm...

Keith: But that doesn't count. Ali can still do it.

Janine: We're good. It's fine, we're all good, we're all good.

Ali: No — yeah, we're, they're rolled.

Jack: Just under half of these dice are 6s, which is —

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: [snorts]

Janine: Yeah, of course it happens in the game where that really doesn't fucking matter. [chuckles]

Keith: [unintelligible] rolling good.

Jack: No, it does matter in this game! Because the next thing we're going to be doing is selecting details from a series of tables —

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: Inside our playset. And we're going to get that way [chuckles] by selecting dice. So, uh, I mean —

Keith: We had such a bad distribution last time we played this that we rerolled, I think twice. We were just like, this will not be a fun distribution. There were no 1s or 3s —

Ali: [chuckling]

Janine: [chuckles]

Jack: The one that, the, the, the clearest example of this that I can think of in recent Friends at the Table memory is when we played Everest Pipkin’s, “The Ground Itself,” to start Sangfielle, a game about like, massive geological time scales. And the first dice roll determined that the game was going to take place over like, one human week, with no additional time beyond that.

Keith: [laughing]

Janine: [chuckles]

Jack: Uh, we can reroll these if we want. Or we can just have a very strange, interesting, uh, uh, 6 game. This is — we were marketing this as Bluff City Zoo Two, but this might be Bluff City Zoo Six.

Ali: [laughing] Do you want to roll like, half of them, which would take only like some of the 6s out?

Jack: Yeah. Yeah. Let's go.

Keith: Okay.

Ali: I don't know how — okay.

Janine: There you go.

Jack: Okay.

Janine: I think we have as many 5s as we had 6s, but...

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: No, we only have four 5s, you know, a full quarter of these numbers are 5s. [chuckling]

Ali: We got some 1s in here. We have a 2 now.

Keith: To be fair, that's only slightly above what it should be.

Jack: Uh, yeah.

Janine: This is fine, let's —

Ali: I feel better about this.

Jack: I think that this is fine.

Ali: I look at this and I feel peace.

Jack: Uh, Fiasco's traditional opening for person who goes first — so, what we're going to be doing is, we're going to be using these dice to draw from our tables at the beginning of the zoo playset. I think we'll probably put that onscreen. Are we able to do that, Janine, when we choose?

Janine: Sorry, what? Put what onscreen?

Jack: To put the playsets.

Janine: Uh...

Jack: That's okay, if not. Uh, if you want to follow along at home, you can download the playset The Zoo. But, uh, we will talk you through it.

Keith: Yeah, we'll definitely say out loud all the things we're considering.

Jack: This playset is ordering into a series of tables. At the top level, we have things like relationships, we have needs, we have locations, uh, and we have, uh, objects. Uh, and within those are subcategories. For example, the relationship subcategories are things like keepers, zoo hierarchy, communities, romance. And then within those, a further subcategory that says things, for example, like, uh, dolphin trainer and skill trainer. And these each have dice numbers associated with them, and we're going to use the dice that we have to select, uh, information between us. Uh, traditionally the person who grew up in the smallest town goes first, which is always going to be me.

Janine: [laughs]

Jack: So, I need, I, I grew up in a small town, and that information about me will not change, for the rest of my life. So we need to determine another one.

Janine: Hm...

Jack: Who most recently went to the zoo?

Keith: That was the exact one that we used last time.

Jack: Oh, really?

Ali: Mmm...

Keith: Yeah, it was. It was, I think also your suggestion —

Jack: Who suggested it? Okay.

Keith: I think it was you.

Jack: I, much like I grew up in the same place, I have the same brain that I did.

Keith: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: Uh, so I have a — I have a sort of interesting answer, which is, uh, that... I, 2 years ago, lived in a place where my backyard was the sort of, was a sort of public park attached to a zoo. I hadn't been, I hadn't been into the zoo proper in a couple more years than that. But this was the Roger Williams Park, that is part of Roger Williams Zoo. Which is a great zoo, and anyone near Rhode Island that wants to go to a zoo, should go to the Roger Williams Zoo. Uh, so that's —

Jack: You ever see animals in the park? Were there any escapees who came running through the park to your back fence?

Keith: Well, there was lots of birds in the trees, but I don't know if they came from the zoo. I think they just lived there.

Jack: I was at the Long Beach Aquarium the other day, which is a great aquarium, and — the Long Beach Aquarium of the Pacific — and there was [chuckling] like a bird enclosure that had a very striking white bird inside it, in their sort of like, sea birds area. It sort of looked like a, like a fancy egret. And as I was watching, one of those egrets came and landed on the outside of the enclosure. Uh, and I don't know what was going on there, whether it had escaped, or whether this was just an outside version of the inside bird that had come to like, gloat or chat or something? But it was a very strange experience.

Janine: You've just volunteered that you were the most recent person at a zoo, Jack. [chuckles]

Jack: No, but it can't be me, because I grew up in a small town, and —

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: I know, so you have to think — who, who had the smallest pet, what's the smallest pet everyone's had? I had a hamster.

Keith: I had a mouse. I also have had a gecko.

Janine: That's smaller than a hamster. Anyone else got small, smaller? Smallees?

Ali: I had a — I had a fish that had children, so —

Keith: I also had a —

Janine: Oh...

Ali: I feel like those little babies were the smallest pet.

Keith: I had a neon tetra, which is those really teeny, tiny little fish.

Ali: Yeah, uh-huh. Uh-huh.

Jack: Did yours have children, Keith?

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: No, but they are the size of another fish's child.?

Ali: Right, yeah.

Keith: And they don't grow up to be much bigger.

Ali: Shoutout to the, the Fishteen Minutes episode on neon tetras.

Keith: [laughing]

Jack: I'm arbitrating here. Fish child Ali, you are going first. Now, you are spending a dice from this, uh, central pool to choose from the tables of the playset, a general or a specific relationship or detail that matches the number on the die, and places it between two players. They don't necessarily have to be you. We can talk about this stuff, but, uh, you, I believe have to start with general before getting specific. Is that the case?

Ali: Right, I like unlock the category. And then —

Jack: Yes, absolutely.

Ali: The next round that we go around, we can then sort of go down those other doors.

Keith: I had this deja vu moment, because Ali also went first last time, after a fish-based answer.

Ali: What? What?

Jack: You're fucking kidding me.

Janine: [laughs]

Keith: No. Ali convinced you, and you ruled in her favor, that an aquarium counts as a zoo, and that her going to an aquarium —

Jack: Oh, what? But then that means I've —

Janine: It does.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: That means I count, because I went to the aquarium most recently. This is fucking bullshit. Who most recently saw the Coen Brothers film Fargo? I saw it 2 days ago.

Keith: Uh, I saw it 6 months ago.

Janine: Why would you pick a thing that you definitely —

Keith: [laughing]

Janine: Still won again? Which one of us do you think watched Fargo yesterday?

Ali: Yeah, wait. Do you want to go first?

Keith: [still laughing]

Jack: [laughs]

Keith: I thought Jack was specifically trying to avoid going first.

Ali: [snorts]

Keith: Which, again, is something that happened last time.

Jack: Okay, fine. Who has a Godspeed You, Black Emperor pin in the shape of a hammer on their desk?

Janine: [chuckles]

Jack: I've got one right — [chuckles]

Keith: I don't have that.

Ali: [chuckling]

Janine: [chuckles]

Jack: Okay, right. Ali, you — Ali. Begin. Wait, before we begin. There's been some talk about returning characters, and I don't want to speak to whether characters are returning or not. But, if they are, should we make sure that they are not seated next to one another, such that...

Janine: Yes, I was going to say, do we want to change order at all?

Jack: The relationships aren't necessarily the case.

Ali: Oh yeah.

Keith: So we should, we should swap — I know which two are returning, and we should swap Ali and Jack.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Jack: Okay. Sounds good to me.

Ali: [chuckles]

Jack: I don't have access to moving that stuff, unfortunately.

Janine: I got it, I got it. Okay.

Choosing Details [27:15]

Jack: Okay. Uh... all right. So, Ali, you want to take one of these die and talk about what you are unlocking?

Ali: Uh, yeah. I am going to take this white 5. Do I just, do I just pull it over to me? This is mine now?

Jack: Yep. Just hold onto it for the time being.

Ali: I am going to unlock the lost and found, from the... in the zoo objects category on page...

Jack: Ooh.

Ali: 133.

Jack: Could you read, uh, what is contained within that?

Ali: Sure. So, the options that we have within the lost and found are a wallet with a fake ID, a large, wax sculpture of a leaping dolphin, animals' toy, not where it should be. A camera full of incriminating photos, keys on a broken chain, or an empty cage.

Jack: So what Ali has done is, is, like you said, unlocked this category for sort of future, uh, development. Uh, we should, uh, we should open up a scratch doc so we can just, just keep notes of this. I'm going to do that now. Uh, and I will share that with — oop. Google Docs is recommending that I give the document a name before I share it.

Ali: Mmm.

Keith: Who too, Zoo Two.

Janine: Ice cream.

Jack: Zoo Two. All right. I am pasting this link for us... thank you for your patience. Uh, and we have unlocked lost and found. Uh... all right.

Ali: Uh, actually, not to be annoying, but do we not want to use this blank space underneath our thing to put this stuff, so it's all...

Jack: Oh yeah, that's true. We could put it there. We might be able to like alter it later. These can just sort of be like general —

Ali: Like a notes section down here?

Jack: Yeah.

Ali: Okay.

Janine: Let me see if I can put a big note card there for us.

Ali: Oh yeah. Put it in the aesthetics.

Janine: Yeah.

[pause]

Ali: Yow.

Janine: Did you say meow?

Ali: I said, yow.

Janine: Oh.

Ali: Because I was stretching my arm, and it hurts. [laughs]

Keith: [chuckles]

Janine: [laughs] This looks so bad.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: [laughing]

Janine: It's fine, it's all — it's totally fine.

Keith: Hey, does anyone need a sheet of long paper?

Jack: [laughing]

Keith: Does anybody need any long paper today?

Jack: Uh, and who is this relationship between, Ali? Who are you assigning this lost and found category to?

Ali: Oh, I have to do that, too?

Jack: I believe so, yes.

Ali: Oh, boy howdy. Let's, let's have it between me and Janine's character. Am I, am I allowed to keep it that way or do I have to like —

Janine: Also, wait, this is this a relationship?

Jack: It is, it is, uh, uh, details, uh, between people.

Keith: Yeah. Everything goes on one side in this.

Jack: So, relationships between people, uh, uh, relationships between people, needs, locations, and objects are also between people.

Janine: Oh, okay. I fully forgot that.

Keith: Yeah. So, for instance this lost and found thing, let's just say that it's the incriminating photos, and then also, theoretically, Janine, you could then pick that you've got a relationship with, uh, uh, with Ali's character as like, ape escape keeper and monkeyland keeper, where one of you is one, one of you is the other —

Janine: Okay so —

Keith: And the thing that you're tied together with is the incriminating photos.

Janine: Who takes the detail, then? Like who writes?

Keith: Uh, the detail is not fully-formed yet, because it's just the category. So we've got to use another die later —

Janine: Okay.

Keith: To fill it in.

Janine: Okay, okay, okay. Sorry.

Keith: Yeah.

Ali: Also, point of order, I accidentally deleted the die. So am I gonna [laughing] —

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: I’m sorry — [unintelligible]

Jack: [laughing]

Ali: [snorts]

Janine: Can you undo, or —

Ali: I don't know, I don't think so.

Janine: Sorry, okay, hang on, hang on. What number was it?

Keith: It was a white, it was a white —

Ali: It was a white 5.

Keith: 5, yeah.

Janine: Okay.

Ali: I think so long as it's a white die I can —

Janine: I'll just copy this other white 5.

Jack: [chuckles] Yeah. So, ultimately, what you're going to be choosing, Ali, is who you are putting the lost and found detail between.

Ali: Yeah. And I'm, I'm, I'm rolling this dice to, to have it between me and Janine's character.

Jack: Sweet. Okay. So... I am, real quick, going to put — oh, no, how do I do text?

Keith: There's a T.

Ali: [chuckling]

Janine: Text.

Jack: Yeah, but it doesn't go anywhere. I might have just made 1500 text boxes.

Janine: How — what?

Jack: So, if I click I —

Keith: Oh, it's true that it doesn't go anywhere.

Jack: And then text, and then click, fucking nothing happens.

Ali: [chuckling]

Keith: I think it goes away underneath the picture layer in the background here.

Jack: [laughing] Where there's a little hill, a little colony of text boxes.

Janine: Oh, it's because, it's because the — okay, hang on, sorry, this is my bad.

Ali: [chuckles] I didn't have any issues.

Janine: Uh...

Jack: Oh, wait.

Janine: That doesn't —

Jack: Oh, you have to hold the mouse down while you type. [laughs]

Ali: Do you?

Jack: Apparently. I don't know if that's the intended functionality, so —

Keith: Yeah, look at that. That works.

Jack: Here I'm going to put, lost, and —

Keith: You can then — Jack, you can then end it.

Janine: Huh.

Keith: So you can just put a, you can put a temporary letter in there, and then double-click it to get the text thing back open, and then you can put the real thing in.

Janine: Oh, yes, I've been —

Jack: Some bullshit.

Janine: Having this problem with Roll20, just, like, in general.

Jack: Okay. Uh, lentilswede in chat says, “Is Roll20 text tool still as bad as it was during Road Palisade?”

Keith: Worse.

Ali: [chuckles]

Janine: [chuckles]

Ali: [snorts]

Jack: When we — we have used Roll20 for so long, and every time, it feels like I am engaged in gladiatoral combat. [chuckling]

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: It feels like there's like a man with a net, and a trident, who is trying to kill me.

Keith: I'm just glad that I don't have to be in that, in the GM seat, and Janine has to suffer through it.

Janine: It's fine.

Jack: Okay. Well, having selected lost and found, Janine, now it is your turn to do the same.

Janine: Yeah. Uh... let's see what we have here. Uh... oh, uh... [chuckles] I would like to pick 6. Which is the past, as a relationship.

Jack: Ooh.

Ali: Ooh.

Jack: And what is contained within 6?

Janine: What is contained within 6 is estranged siblings — haven't really spoken since the case was closed. Spotlighted in the same local newspaper article, last two reminders of the old zoo before the renovations. Went to high school together, and, one rescued the other from the fire.

Jack: Incredible.

Janine: Uh, and I'm going to put this between Jack and Ali's character.

Jack: Ooh. Okay, so I'm going to put, uh, relationship — the past. Nope, that's not right. Okay, let's try this. Okay. All right. Okay. Let's see. [chuckles] Now, I'm going to look at the dice that I have available. Because I would like to flesh out, uh, one of these relationships. Probably the relationship between me and Ali. Uh, just get a little bit more detail into this relationship.

Ali: Oh, we don't have to do a full round before...

Jack: Uh, I don't believe so, so long as I am unlocking some the past.

Ali: Okay.

Jack: The category has been unlocked. Uh, let's see. [chuckles] Do you have any thoughts about these, Ali? Are any of these really speaking to you? Because I have a couple of ones that I'm interested in, but I wanted to see if, if there was any overlap there.

Ali: [chuckling] I think any of them are appropriate. I think I could slot —

Jack: Okay.

Ali: I could slot the vibe that I'd like for tonight into any of these.

Jack: Yeah. Did you have something else there?

Ali: No.

Jack: Then I think I'm going to take, uh, a number 3, and be spotlighted in the same local newspaper article.

Ali: Perfect.

Jack: Oh, wait, shit. This should have been Keith's turn. I was confused.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: Oh, that's okay.

Jack: Janine just went, and and then Keith went.

Janine: Oh yeah, that's, I think that's what Ali was asking.

Jack: Oh, [chuckling] I thought Ali was asking, don't we have to go —.

Janine: [chuckling] About the full round.

Keith: Oh, okay.

Jack: Do we have to do a full round of selecting the categories. I whiffed that. But, yes. I am going to take, uh, spotlighted in the same local newspaper article as mine. And now Keith can go.

Keith: Okay. I am going to... take... oh, there's only two 4s. So I'm going to take these 4s. But I want to make sure that no one else had their eyes on the 4s so just in case I... like, is there anyone that wanted a 4, 4 of something, that I'm going to screw over by taking a 4?

Jack: I don't think so.

Keith: Okay. Sorry, Jack, this 3 is between us?

Jack: Uh, no, this 3 is between Ali and me.

Keith: Okay, yeah, that's what I thought.

Jack: Yeah, I just put that there because it was my dice.

Keith: Okay. So I'm going to take, uh, for a need, uh, to get respect.

Jack: Ooh. Okay. And what are the things in the, to get respect, category?

Keith: Uh, to get respect from the community for a job well done. From the board, despite the mistakes. From the international zoological society, who will understand. From the one who left. From DE Hitchcock the IV, even though he's dead.

Jack: [chuckles]

Keith: Or from an animal, lest it turn on you.

Jack: Wow.

Keith: I think these are all great. I have a couple of these in mind, uh, now I don't know who... uh, either you, Jack, or you, Janine, are playing. So if either of these feels like something that, that the two of you, or that one of you wants to focus on, then I'm happy to put that die anywhere. Uh, I just want to be a part of that. Uh, if not, then Janine, I don't think, has a die yet. So I'm going to put it between me and Janine, unless Jack was like, that works really well for me.

Jack: No, no, go ahead.

Keith: Okay.

Janine: Ali.

Ali: Hello.

Janine: You're up.

Ali: Uh, I am up. Oh, boy. Now we have to start thinking about numbers, and words.

Jack: I know. That first round is so easy, because you, it can be anything.

Ali: Uh-huh. We — okay, we have two 1s. Okay. All right. Okay. I'm torn between spending this 1 to unlock animals or habitats —

Jack: Oh, good idea.

Ali: Because I just [chuckling] feel like, like this is like —

Janine: Mmm.

Ali: If we're, if we're spending these 1s, we've got to get —

Janine: I mean, we have three 1s, so —

Ali: Do we have three of them? Oh.

Janine: Yeah. Go wild, you know?

Ali: Oh, there's another one up at the top there. Okay.

Janine: Yeah.

Ali: Okay, okay, okay. Perfect. Uh... then I... okay. I'm going to unlock the habitats, are which our options are reptile house, Australian excursion exhibit, ocean world exhibit, penguin habitat, bat cafe, or the grizzly habitat.

Jack: Wow.

Ali: And... do Keith and Jack's character have a relationship die between them yet?

Keith: No.

Ali: Okay, so —

Jack: No.

Ali: I'm going to give that to y'all.

Keith: Sorry, what was the category of this one?

Ali: Uh, it's locations, and then the 1 is habitats.

Keith: Okay.

Janine: Okay. Uh... I know exactly what I'm going for.

Jack: Hell yeah.

Janine: Uh, I am going to fill in the rest of that it detail that Ali gave me, the lost and found one. Uh, I'm taking another 1. It is a wallet with a fake ID.

Ali: [giggling]

Jack: Ooh. This is from the lost and found category.

Keith: Yeah.

Janine: Yes.

Jack: Exciting.

Ali: I'll write that down...

Janine: I got it. I did it very badly, but...

Jack: Uh, what was the category you just took — oh, it was the —

Ali: I need to put dice in too.

Jack: The habitats category.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Jack: Cool. And that's between Keith and me.

Ali: Yep.

Jack: Gonna put that in. [pause] Okay. Cool. All right. Now it's Keith's turn again.

Keith: Uh, okay. That's, that's true? Is it?

Ali: Mm-hm.

Keith: Okay. We went, we went in such a weird order —

Jack: No, I screwed it up last time, so... but, we have now returned to —

Keith: Everyone gets four turns so as long as everyone gets four, then we're good.

Janine: Yeah.

Keith: Okay. So... Jack, we need a detail. Janine, we need a relationship. And then there's also the...

Jack: There should be a relationship between every player.

Keith: Right.

Janine: Mm-hm.

Keith: Well, between every adjacent player.

Jack: Relationships are mandatory. Yes, yes. Between every adjacent player.

Janine: But this is why it's four dice per player, right?

Keith: Right.

Janine: Is you get two for each thing. To figure those out.

Jack: Yeah. Right.

Janine: So it'll happen.

Keith: Yeah. Uh...

Ali: Was that not, last dice, that you last picked, Keith, not between you and Janine? I thought it was.

Keith: It was. I, so I, uh, we, I need a relationship with Janine, we have a detail.

Ali: Oh, oh, okay.

Keith: And I need a detail with Jack, we have a relationship.

Ali: Mmm.

Keith: Wait, is location a detail or a relationship?

Jack: A location is a detail.

Keith: Okay. So, yeah.

Jack: Sorry, that should have been down here.

Keith: Uh... then, uh, let's... let's go with... ah. Oh, no! Oh. Ugh! Oh, sorry.

Ali: [giggling]

Jack: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait. What are you thinking. Because there's an interesting rule here.

Keith: Okay. I... had a fun idea earlier, and I would need two 1s to do it, and there's only one 1 left.

Jack: Okay. It is worth saying that the last die spent is wild. The person who spends it chooses its value.

Keith: Okay. Okay.

Jack: So you could parlay that, you, you would have to parlay with somebody, much like those weirdos in the Hunter x Hunter screenshot we're doing, into like an actual, uh, outcome.

Keith: Okay.

Jack: But that's a possibility there.

Keith: Jack.

Jack: Keith.

Keith: You are going to have the last turn.

Jack: Okay.

Keith: Would you like to be... a small mammals keeper and a reptile house keeper with me?

Jack: Keith... I thought you'd never ask.

Ali: [giggling]

Keith: Okay. So I will take a 1 for relationship, keeper. And then at the end, your wild die can be —

Jack: [chuckles] Oh, it's great. Fiasco is great, because I truly was not going into this expecting to be playing a zoo keeper, or, I didn't have a zoo keeper in mind, but as soon as these dice start coming out, I'm like, “All right, yeah, I, think I, I think I could be a zoo keeper today.”

Keith: [laughing]

Janine: [chuckles]

Jack: [laughs] God, small mammals keeper and reptile house keeper is so fucking funny.

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: Okay do you want to write that in, or shall I?

Keith: We'll keep the snakes to a minimum.

Jack: Okay.

Keith: Yeah, I'll write that in.

Jack: Right. So... I would like to start looking for a... a detail between Ali and my relationship, I think, is what I would like to be looking for. Mmm.

Janine: Can I gently point something out?

Jack: I would love to see it.

Janine: Uh, I... simply think that in the objects category, the 6, still more animals, has some really exquisite things.

Jack: I was just looking at this. So —

Janine: Okay, good.

Jack: Right off the bat, I'm going to spend a 6 here, uh, and I'm going to read out what is in the category, “Still more animals.” I would make a mini-series of Bluff City —

Ali: [giggling]

Jack: Where each episode was about one of these little weirdos.

Janine: Mm-hm. And the first one is off the table.

Jack: They are —

Janine: Which is good.

Jack: Why is the first one off the table?

Janine: Because of the whole 1 situation.

Jack: Because we can't spend a 1, right. 1.

Janine: Yeah. Yeah.

Jack: Dennis, a king cobra. 2, ill-trained raptor without its hood. 3, beloved — beloved kangaroo, promised to a different zoo.

Keith: Trenton.

Jack: 4, and I'm — Ali, I'm speaking very clearly.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: A fish worth 120,000 dollars. 5. Live mice meant for the reptile house, and 6, Lenny and Marcus, giraffes on loan. So the detail that I'm putting in here is just... more animals. Uh, and then we is, we can specify that.

Ali: Okay, sure.

Keith: Do we have, do the fish experts here, uh, have any ideas of what kind of a fish might be worth, what makes a fish worth 120,000 dollars?

Ali: I have an array of ideas. [laughing]

Jack: Yeah, I think this is a play to find out what happens, type situation.

Keith: Okay.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: Uh... but we will, we will, we'll figure it out. Uh...

Ali: Mm-hm.

Jack: Excellent. All right. Now it's Ali's turn.

Ali: Yeah. I, uh, I used my first two dice on detail stuff. So, unless I can — [laughing] unless somebody can promise to assign me a relationship, I'm just going to —

Jack: It can't be me.

Ali: Hope that the 4 in play somewhere.

Janine: I can promise to assign you a relationship.

Ali: Okay, cool. In that case, I will be fulfilling destiny to grab this —

Janine: Oh...

Ali: This, this, uh, the black 4 on the bottom here, to make our fish worth 120 — 120,000 dollars.

Jack: 120,000 dollars.

Ali: [chuckling]

Keith: [game show host voice] 120,000 dollars.

Jack: That fish is worth so much fucking money. Okay.

Janine: Mmm... I'm looking at the relationships here. Uh... illicit.

Ali: [laughing] Okay.

Keith: Mmm.

Jack: Mmm, good, good.

Keith: Classic. It's a classic —

Jack: Could you read this one out?

Janine: Wait, why do we have, how do we have three die here, on this thing? There should only be two.

Ali: Oh, I guess, I've, I've been sort of keeping my die here, but I think technically that 4 should have gone to Jack.

Janine: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Because this is like the between us space.

Ali: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Janine: Yeah.

Ali: Yeah.

Janine: Illicit, okay.

Jack: Incredible.

Ali: Incredible.

Keith: Yeah, the hardest part about playing Fiasco to me is, uh, remembering about where everything goes, because your — you have two cards between you, you don't have your own card —

Janine: Mm-hm.

Keith: Uh, that's like really the only obstacle to playing this game. [chuckling].

Jack: Yeah. Could you read through the contents of illicit, please, Janine?

Janine: Yeah. So the contents of illicit are, the would be thief and the one with the plan. Betrayed by a common foe. The last two who know what really happened. Partners in a fraud. The liar and the one with the evidence. And, animal smugglers.

Jack: That last one is just so straightforward. [chuckles]

Janine: Mm-hm.

Jack: Because I feel like — yep, just animal smugglers.

Keith: Yep.

Jack: Uh, okay. Great. Uh, and that is, that's — between... whom?

Janine: That is between Ali's character and my character.

Ali: Nice.

Jack: Exciting. I love to see, uh, an illicit relationship in which one person has access to a fish worth 120,000 dollars.

Janine: [laughing]

Keith: [laughing]

Jack: And the other person wants to get respect.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: Okay, Keith, I think you're up.

Keith: Uh, all right. I'm going to... put on the board... let's see, we've got three 3s, two 5s, and a 2. So, uh, let's see. Community, another illicit... I'm looking for... zoo hierarchy. Hm. Uh... Janine, do you feel any way, uh, about your potential character, between zoo hierarchy and community?

Janine: Uh... I mean, it... uh... I'll roll with the punches. Uh... maybe —

Keith: We could have another illicit relationship.

Janine: Community?

Keith: You can have two illicit relationships, that's fine.

Ali: [chuckling]

Jack: I don't know if you can.

Janine: Well, uh, I'll be transparent. I kind of, I kind of want one of those 5s. So I, I have an incentive to not encourage illicit again.

Keith: Okay.

Janine: I think community, maybe, is, is better.

Keith: Okay.

Janine: I have some loose details in mind. I haven't committed to anything, but I do have thoughts.

Jack: Excellent. And that's between, uh, Janine and Keith.

Keith: Yeah, true.

Jack: So that's our last, uh, relationship showing up from scratch.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Jack: I love Fiasco. I remember the first time I played Fiasco, this process was... so nightmarishly complicated to me, uh, especially because I sort of didn't really know what was going to happen afterwards. But now it feels, it really does feel like, uh, looking at the props table backstage and being like, “Oh, wow, look what we've got waiting for us.”

Keith: Yeah. Yeah.

Janine: [chuckles]

Keith: Really, the work — it's just a little, it does take a little longer than you'd like.

Jack: Yeah. I think part of that is Roll20.

Keith: Yeah, that's fair. Yeah.

Janine: [laughing]

Keith: And also, only ever — this is, you know, we haven't played this, this playset in 5 years. We've only ever used any other playset one time. I think, you know, if this was a regular game for you and you had, you know, more internalized these different options, it would be faster.

Jack: Yep. Okay. Who's up now?

Ali: You, right? Keith?

Keith: No, I just went.

Ali: Oh.

Jack: Okay. So what do we got? We are looking at a 3, a — two 3s, a 2, and two 5s. Okay. So, Ali and I have a complete relationship now. Uh...

Ali: Yeah.

Jack: But we could always put, uh, more in. But probably shouldn't. So, instead, I am going to work on the... and I can't develop this keeper's relationship with Keith, because I need the wild dice to do that.

Keith: Correct.

Ali: Oh, right, right, right, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay.

Jack: So, instead, I think I want to work on... the illicit relationship between Ali and Janine. Unless you have thoughts about this, Janine.

Janine: I did.

Jack: Okay. Then I —

Keith: Is this your bye?

Jack: Then I am going to —

Janine: This is... yeah.

Ali: Oh...

Janine: That's what I would like. It's — you know, it's fine if it doesn't come together, but.

Jack: No, no, no, no. Let me look at the Keith/Janine relationships. Uh... let's see.

Keith: Uh, I was looking at the 2 for this.

Jack: Uh, in community?

Janine: Mmm.

Keith: Mm-hm.

Jack: Let's see, let me look at this.

Keith: I'll let you...

Jack: Let me discover it myself.

Keith: Yep.

Jack: Ah. Uh, is this the one that says, “Just elected to positions in the city's parks department?”

Keith: Correct. Yep.

Jack: Mmm, how do you feel about this, Janine?

Janine: Oh, I can make it work.

Jack: Yeah, absolutely. All right, so —

Keith: Is it a conflict of interest to have, have me also working at the zoo as a zoo keeper? I don't know.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: I don't know.

Jack: Yeah. Let me put this here, and I'm going to put, newly elected to the city parks department. This is interesting, because last time when we played, we were very internal zoo focused. But this brings us is into context, right? With the, with the larger authorities.

Keith: Right. So, for anyone who didn't get a chance to listen to the last one, me and Ali played zoo keepers, Janine played the social media manager of the zoo, uh, who seemed to, I can't — I actually couldn't get a good read on if, if she genuinely didn't know much about animals, or if we just kept saying that. Uh...

Ali: [wheezes]

Keith: [laughs] And then —

Janine: She... she knew a lot, she knew enough about animals.

Keith: Yeah. And then Jack playing the intern.

Ali: Oh, it looks like the stream cut out?

Jack: Ooh. Woah, yeah, stream went down.

Janine: Uh...

Jack: Oh, I think it's back now, but...

Keith: I, I refreshed, but I'm, I've got to watch an ad. [gremlin voice] Giving us that money.

Jack: Are we back? Nope, we are not back.

Keith: [gremlin voice] Money, money, money.

Janine: What can I do here? What's happening?

Jack: We return.

Janine: We return.

Jack: Nothing altered, game-wise —

Janine: No.

Jack: Uh, other than, you know, we just —

Janine: Took a little break.

Jack: And took the relationship, uh, between Keith and Janine as recently elected to positions in the city parks department —

Janine: Yes.

Jack: Which is I think what had happened before, uh, before the internet. So now I think it's Ali's turn.

Ali: Hello. And I — very bad timing, chewing on a pretzel.

Jack: Okay.

Keith: What shape? What's your form factor here?

Jack: Yes, make her speak.

Ali: Uh, form factor here is a flat circle. With like —

Keith: Ooh, time-shaped.

Janine: Oh, that's weird.

Ali: Yeah, it's like a grid, it's like, it's like a, it's like the top to a sewer. Uh, butter flavored, fantastic.

Janine: Yum.

Ali: Yeah. Uh, I didn't know that buttered flavor pretzels were a thing? I was given some on a plane, and I was like, huh. And now I buy them at the store. Anyway —

Jack: You were given them on the plane, by the plane crew?

Ali: Yeah, well, it was like the plane snack.

Jack: Wow. You are — this is like deeply, this is a deeply rare experience, right? Of like having a snack on a plane, but from the plane company that is so good that you go home and you go, “I want to get some of that.”

Ali: Yeah. Well, no, because, I also started eating the, uh, the popcorners that they give to you on Jetblue, which is like the, the chips that are made out of like flattened popcorn, question mark. Another thing I was given to on a plane I was like, “Hey, this is pretty good,” [wheezes] so —

Janine: All these things you're saying sound really made-up to me.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: Sorry, popcorners? What is a pop — can you explain popcorners again?

Ali: You've — you've never —

Janine: It's a popcorn chip, Keith. You eat them with your sewer grate pretzels.

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: That the airplane gives you. These are all real things.

Ali: [laughing] People don't know popcorners?

Janine: No.

Keith: The only thing I've gotten on an airplane was a ginger ale with good ice.

Janine: That ice is bad, you shouldn't have the ice.

Keith: What?

Janine: Plane ice is bad.

Ali: I'm going to put this in our Bluff City Zoo chat.

Keith: Plane ice is bad?

Janine: Though don't clean out their water systems often enough. You don't get watery things on, you don't get the coffee or tea or ice on a flight, because the water might be —

Ali: No, because they're not making the water on the plane. They're, they're, they're bringing ice onto the plane. Like, I get it, I get it with coffee and tea, but with the —

Keith: I think that's true. I think they're bringing the ice on the plane.

Ali: I think they have bags of ice that are, they're putting into a —

Janine: I don't know.

Keith: I would be able to tell if the ice wasn't good, because I'm putting that ice in my mouth, and I'm hanging out with it.

Ali: Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Anyway, with my —

Janine: [laughing]

Ali: [chuckling] With my turn, I am going to fulfill the detail on me and Janine's relationship to be the liar and the one with the evidence.

Janine: Hell yeah. Okay. So it leaves us with 5, 3, 3. Relationship, uh, that one's filled in. Okay, what did — uh... wait, where do... we have three die. Where do they go? Oh, okay, I see.

Keith: Uh, so we get, we have a detail, Janine, and then me and Jack have relationship and location.

Janine: Right. Okay. Keeper's location, and to get respect. Let me take a look at my options here.

Jack: Fighting for my life with this snapping. [laughing] I'm going to, I'm going to become the joker.

Keith: Oh, the snapping, yes. Yeah.

Janine: What snapping?

Keith: The text is on a grid.

Jack: The text snapping.

Janine: Oh yeah. If you hold down Alt, it'll let you put it wherever you want.

Jack: Oh, what?

Keith: What?!

Janine: Yeah. [chuckling]

Ali: Y'all didn't know that?

Jack: No!

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: Well, we normally don't deal with the... I think I might have known this at, at one time.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Jack: Isn't it nice to be alive? Learn new things every day.

Keith: Yeah, I love that.

Janine: It's good. Uh... you know, I don't want to get 5-greedy, but... I think I have to go with detail, need, to get respect from DE Hitchcock the IV, even though he's dead.

Ali: [chuckling]

Keith: [laughing]

Jack: [laughs]

Ali: I think that's really fitting for the two of y'all's vibe. I'm excited to see this play out.

Keith: I'm excited to find out who DE Hitchcock the IV is.

Janine: I have an answer.

Ali: [giggling]

Keith: Oh, that's great. I can't wait to figure out how... my character [laughs] cares about a dead guy named DE Hitchcock the IV.

Janine: [laughing] Yes.

Keith: The original big cat guy.

Janine: Oh.

Jack: Oh.

Keith: Okay. My turn here. Uh, it's, it's, I, I have no choice. We are location, habitats, 3. Whatever that is. Uh...

Jack: What is that?

Keith: Location, habitats, ocean world exhibit.

Jack: Woah.

Keith: Oh, hey, that works out, actually.

Jack: Yeah, because I have access to a fish worth 120,000 dollars, presumably.

Janine: [laughs]

Keith: Big money.

Jack: Money. Is that your slogan?

Keith: Big money? Yeah.

Jack: Money.

Keith: No, I said big money.

Jack: Oh, I thought you whistled. [laughs] Uh...

Keith: I also whistled.

Jack: Was it deep sea ocean? What is it?

Keith: It's, uh, ocean world exhibit.

Jack: Ocean world. Wrong. [laughing] Ocean —

Keith: Uh, we're both — I'll let you do it, I'll let you do it.

Jack: Ocean world exhibit.

Keith: Yep.

Jack: Interesting. Okay. This is fascinating, because now I'm going to spend this last 3... okay. Were I to just spend this on the relationship keepers, we would be pachyderm habitat keeper, and great cats keeper.

Keith: [chuckling]

Jack: But it's wild, which means that I can make it any of these. Now, small mammals keeper and reptile house keeper is extremely funny. But I wanted to check in to see how we felt about that.

Keith: Sorry, small mammals keeper and reptile house keeper?

Jack: Yes.

Keith: Okay. So last time, the relationship was, me and Ali, pachyderm habitat keeper and great cats keeper.

Jack: Okay. Yeah, but I'm saying we could make it any of these.

Keith: And — oh, we could make it any of them. Okay.

Jack: Because this final dice is wild, die is wild.

Keith: Okay. I, I have — this is —

Jack: Oh, no, stream might have gone down again.

Janine: No! It says it's here, it says it —

Jack: Nope, it's back.

Keith: Uh, it's live for me. It's live.

Jack: I just saw people in the chat — ugh.

Janine: Okay. Oh.

Jack: Just a little blip, apparently. Okay.

Janine: Hm...

Keith: Okay.

Jack: Shaking, shaking my, shaking my head at, at Twitch.

Keith: So, this is, I have a, I, have colored, I have a bias, because I had a bit for... small mammals keeper. And I'm motivated by my bit.

Jack: Okay.

Keith: But I don't actually care if that is a driving force between our relationships. I'm playing the same character. I'm playing Dex. It would make sense for me to be great cats keeper again, and you know, you are the replacement Darren. I think that's —

Ali: Oh.

Keith: Uh, I think that makes a lot of sense for a repeat. And we got there extremely naturally, totally by accident. Uh, I think, uh, any of the rest of these are fun. Uh, rainforest adventure and safari adventure? That sounds fun. Wolf den and Australian excursion? That sounds fun. Uh, dolphin trainer and seal trainer? That's a little left-field. But it still sounds fun. Uh, I'm — I will let you do whatever you think is the right thing to do here.

Jack: I think we're going to go small mammals keeper and reptile house keeper.

Keith: Okay.

Jack: However... yes. Yes. I don't, I thought that I had a thought here — I don't have a thought here. No thoughts in my head.

Keith: Okay.

Jack: Okay, so —

Keith: Do you hear Ali being wounded that someone would get —

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: Would have that pachyderm job?

Jack: I know. [laughs]

Ali: I, okay — this is, this is —

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: Being the pachyderm guy is different from being a replacement Darren, okay?

Keith: [cracking up]

Jack: Whoa, yeah.

Ali: You know?

Jack: Yeah, that's true.

Keith: Well, well the end of, the end of that, of that last thing, tragically, was that you moved to Trenton Zoo, and we lose touch, we stop being best friends.

Ali: I know. I know. Oh my god, I — shoutout to the FATT wiki people, because the way that I, uh, prepared for this was just reading [wheezes] Darren's wiki, which is very dense.

Jack: [chuckles]

Ali: Uh, and I completely forgot that, because of the way Fiasco works, which I did not internalize at the time, I just had to keep giving him, like, incredibly downer endings.

Keith: Yeah.

Ali: [wheezes] And so it was like —

Jack: [laughs]

Ali: He kept like, finding a little bit of success in something, and then it just getting like, dashed away from him. I think the, the final sentence is like, “He loses his, like, animal marriage license.”

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: It doesn't get renewed by the Trenton School, because like, he has a bad reputation.

Keith: Uh, the —

Jack: It's so sad.

Keith: The final bit on the, for the episode part of the wiki is, uh, with Darren working at Trenton, Dax doesn't get to see him as much anymore until they're not really best friends. Dax, believing that zoo is no place for animals, releases the great cats into the wild and is chased by the police.

Jack: [laughing]

Ali: [giggling]

Keith: He skips town, last seen wearing Groucho Marx glasses as a disguise, and heading to his favorite spot on the boardwalk, to get chicken tenders, before getting onto a city bus, trying to get as far as he can on 18 dollars.

Ali: Oh...

Jack: Wow, that's... sad.

Ali: When we did this at the time, we did not realize the like, you can't leave Bluff City thing. Like there aren't — [wheezes] outside of Bluff City isn't a specific — like you can't just go to Cincinnati —

Jack: I mean, you can get on a bus and try — and, go in a direction. But, what happens after that is probably a bit of a question mark.

Ali: Uh-huh.

Keith: Well, and it was, it was a live — so this is a non slash pseudocanonical —

Janine: Yeah.

Ali: Oh, 100 percent. I just mean like, the — what we've developed through Bluff City, like, and we're going to talk about this more later, when we talk about our zoo. But like, Trenton because like, a thing that existed, that didn't really exist. And the thought of like, going to New York City isn't really a possibility for anyone in Bluff City. I think the first time this really came onscreen was when... Jack, you were in the superhero game?

Jack: Yeah. Yeah. Uh, yeah.

Janine: Paternoster.

Jack: Yeah, from, from England.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Jack: But, but, what does that mean in Bluff City?

Janine: [laughing]

Jack: Uh, and the answer, you know, that episode's good and you can listen to it, but, uh, what characters in Bluff City, where they think they might be from and where they're actually from, and what they are ontologically is...

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: Is interesting. Uh, but you know, there's, you can stay in Bluff City, sometimes. So here we are. We have relationships between everybody, and details to fill them out. Uh, I think we should go through these and talk about them. But before we do, I'd like to read a bit from the book. This is on the Fiasco rulebook, page 25, uh, something that I really like about this book and that I think is a hallmark of good, uh, tabletop writing, is that you are given as many opportunities to learn about, uh, what makes the game good at the table, as well as the rules, you know. Jason Morningstar takes time to be like, “Here is how I think this works best.” Uh, and I think it might be worth talking about, uh, objects, specifically. Uh, he begins with this quote from Joe Sarno from, “The Way of the Gun,” where he says, “15 million dollars is not money. It's a motive with a universal adaptor on it.” Which is an incredible line. Uh, but he says that there are some questions to ask about objects, which is, is the object capable of being equally important to both sides of the relationship? Is the object a clear magnet for trouble of various types? Is the object clearly going to have a life of its own, rather than being useless color? If the answer to each is a fist-pumping yes, you've got a perfect object.

And I think that the objects that we have onscreen here, this wallet with a fake ID and a fish worth 120,000 dollars, kind of all, uh, uh, uh, check those, check those boxes. Uh, he goes on to say, bind details together, and come back to them again and again. Once they've been defined, one or the other should crop up in pretty much every scene. However innocuous a detail seems, it should be a fountain of trouble, and often the most mundane details are the strongest choices. Let's go through what we have. I will start. Uh, I have a relationship with Ali's character. We were both spotlighted in the same local newspaper article. And, uh, we have some sort of entanglement between us, involving a fish that is worth 120,000 dollars. Uh, Ali, do you want to talk about your relationship with Janine?

Ali: Uh, yeah. So, our relationship comes from the illicit category. And, it is the liar and the one with the evidence. Uh, and then, our, uh, the detail of that relationship, a thing that we both share, is, in the lost and found, there is a wallet with a fake ID.

Janine: Uh, my relationship with Keith's character is from community — recently elected to positions in city parks department. Uh, the detail is, a need to get respect from DE Hitchcock the IV, even though he's dead.

Keith: Uh, my relationship with, uh, Jack, is as keepers, small mammal keeper and reptile house keeper, and our location — or, our detail is the location, the ocean world exhibit.

Describing Characters [1:11:30]

Jack: Interesting. Okay, so I think that the, the point that we should talk about now is who we are playing. Uh, and once we've kind of established our characters, we can, uh, uh, kind of get a little bit more detail before we actually begin scenes. On page 21 of the book, uh, he says — as you gradually build the game elements up, bits of situation will start to emerge. Encourage this and go with it. You have unlimited freedom in interpreting the meaning and positioning of the elements that are brought into the game.

At a minimum, you'll need to sort out who is who, if the relationship is unequal, and some adjustment will probably be necessary to make all the relationships mesh well. Uh, so I think that once we kind of figure out who we're playing, we can start being like, wait a second, what does this relationship involve? As we move into play. Uh, should we start with the people who are returning?

Keith: Uh, yeah, that makes sense.

Ali: Sure.

Keith: Ali, do you want to go?

Ali: Hello. Hi. Yeah, sure. Hi. Hello. Hi. I — [chuckles] I'm going to be reprising my role as, uh, Darren Cruiser. Darren Cruiser, from what I gather [chuckling] from my hazy memories of —

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: What? [wheezes] What?

Keith: Hey, Darren Cruiser's got a few hazy memories of his own, if you know what I mean.

Ali: [cackling] Uh, my hazy memories of the last time we played, he was a bro, he was a friend, but he was a little bit of a go-getter, [laughing] uh... uh, I described him at the time as, uh, the guy getting hit by the chair in the lads video, the lads video where there's two guys [laughing] out in a backyard, one of them picks up a cigarette off of the floor, smokes from it, bends over, and his friend —

Keith: I, I just want to say, I don't want to —

Ali: [laughing] Hits him in the back of the head with a chair.

Keith: I don't want to correct you on this video, but I think it's really important that, one of the friends, there's like 3 or 4 of them out in the backyard. One of the friends finishes smoking the cigarette, throws it into a pile —

Ali: [wheezes]

Keith: Of broken glass on the ground —

Jack: [laughs]

Keith: And another one of them picks it up to be like, “That wasn't done.”

Ali: Uh-huh. I think they also kiss —

Jack: And then kiss, on the mask.

Keith: And then they kiss. Yeah.

Ali: Yeah. Uh-huh. And then the one hits the other one with the chair.

Keith: [laughing] Really hard. He broke the —

Ali: [cackling]

Keith: [laughing] It's just one of the best videos of all time.

Ali: I, there was another video that I really, really, wanted to share that I've been thinking of. We — I think, I saw this tweeted when we were doing the marathon. And I put in the chat at the time, if we go back to Bluff City Zoo, I have to bring this energy back. And the video I wanted to link, and I hope people know that I'm talking about, it's a guy, there's a guy sitting in a car, and I guy standing outside of the car leans into the car to light his cigarette with the other guy's lit cigarette.

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: Oh.

Ali: [laughing] Uh...

Jack: Is it, is it deeply homoerotic in the same way?

Keith: It's, —

Ali: Yeah.

Keith: Well, they're also all topless and wearing like, six-inch inseam shorts, like —

Jack: I, I, I should say, these videos —

Keith: Or five.

Jack: I haven't seen the, the cigarette car video. But definitely the chair hit video, is like a skeleton key for my brain of like, cis gay masculinity, of like —

Ali: [chuckling]

Jack: I see that video and I'm like, “It all makes sense to me! This is great!” Uh... but yeah. It's a powerful energy.

Keith: Oh, I, I missed that we had switched to a different video. Are they wearing shorts in the car video, too?

Ali: No.

Keith: No, okay, I'm talking, I'm talk —

Ali: The car video, you don't really have the perspective to see outfits great, unfortunately.

Keith: Okay, okay.

Ali: Uh, I... I'm so — so like, the words on the tweet is like, “Be my one and only,” or whatever, something [laughing] I can't link the video, because the, the, the, account has been suspended, apparently.

Jack: No!

Ali: But —

Jack: That's up there with the, uh, the, telling you everything I know about the movie Grease. In terms of like —

Ali: I know.

Jack: Great videos that have been lost to history.

Keith: Oh, that's really sad.

Ali: Yeah. I'm sure it's out there somewhere, I just, I, I, I don't have the keywords to dig for it. Uh... but yeah. That's Darren. Well, so, famously, also, Darren had a huge downturn in his life the last time we saw him, in... uh, Bluff City. Uh, he was, he had a side business of getting animals married? Which is why we really wanted to renew —

Jack: [laughing]

Ali: The, uh, the vows between the lion and the lioness in the last game. Uh...

Keith: Can I add a little detail here?

Ali: Please.

Keith: Uh, part of this is because, uh, Jack's character had negotiated a deal to send the lion away to another zoo. And, the lion that we still had was extremely depressed because of this.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Keith: And Jack, you, you had — the unbelievable line of insisting that, uh, the only way to make it up to, uh, uh, a cat is to make real, material amends. You repeated several times —

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: Real, material amends. And the wedding was part of your attempt to fix this cat, this sick cat that we had, by making the real, material amend of bringing the other cat.

Jack: Ugh. We're fucking funny, bro.

Keith: Yeah, it was so funny.

Jack: We're good at our jobs.

Keith: It's so funny.

Ali: [laughing] Uh... so, I guess after performing that ceremony, he transferred to Trenton Zoo, he got fired, I guess, and then was trying to continue the animal ceremonies. And I think, like, did a few weddings, but then like, got — [chuckling] didn't get his license renewed. So, I have been thinking about Darren in this era, I think, depending on the — I don't want to get too much into like, plot stuff that we've spoken about until we have the time to talk about that together, but, uh, we have been thinking about this as not being the same location as the first game. So I think that, like, there's a part of him that's like —

Jack: Wow.

Ali: Trying to get, you know, having gotten a job at a zoo again is like trying to believe that love is real again, you know? He's trying to get his groove back, so to speak.

Jack: Wow.

Ali: [laughing] Uh... I don't know that, uh, I don't know how far we want to be, in terms of like, the, tricity advertisements as happening. Like, people are going from city to city really blatantly, because that's like, that tunnel project has been established. Uh... but... the more that I think about Bluff City as a whole, the more that I think about... I might be a Blue City girl. I might stan Blue City. [wheezes]

Jack: [laughs]

Ali: And the thought of Darren as someone who like, had a studio apartment in Blue City for a couple years and then like, moved back to Bluff City, to like, try to be like, “Yeah, I can, I can be in a zoo again, I'm I think ready to be that person again —“

Jack: Wow.

Ali: Is where I'm thinking of Darren.

Jack: Wow...

Keith: That does work, timeline? Because in my head, I can't get away from just that, it's been 5 years for us, and that it's been, it's also been 5 years in... between 1 and 2.

Ali: Right, yeah. That seems very convenient. Yeah.

Keith: Jack?

Jack: In the pseudocanonical realm that we are in, I think we can make those things be true.

Keith: Yeah. Yeah.

Jack: You know. Uh...

Keith: Well, I don't think we had a canonical year. The only —

Jack: No, no, that's true.

Keith: The only real touchstone that we had was that Dax was using a razor, and that was, uh, strange.

Jack: Yes, but, uh...

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: A razor, sorry, a Motorola Razr cell phone. Gold, gold-colored.

Jack: Yeah. So, uh, you are playing — [laughs] Darren Cruiser, it's so good.

Ali: I know.

Jack: Uh, an Darren's pronouns are he/him.

Ali: Yeah.

Jack: Firmly?

Ali: Mm-hm.

Jack: [unintelligible] Kissing a, kissing a guy —

Ali: [chuckling]

Jack: And then hitting another guy with a chair. The kisser and the kissee, are they the hitter and the hitee? Or is it just, I think the guy who gets hit, kisses another unrelated man.

Ali: Oh, maybe. Let me watch this —

Keith: I think there's, I think there might be two kisses in there.

Ali: No, it's the, it's the, it, he, it's the guy who hits him that kisses him.

Keith: Yeah, at the very, very beginning.

Ali: He kisses, and then he, yeah, he drinks some liquor, and then he throws it on the ground [laughing]

Keith: Throws the bottle.

Jack: It's so fucking funny.

Ali: He smokes the cigarette and he throws it on the ground, and then he bends over, and then his friend [laughing] picks the cigarette up, and then he gets hit by the chair. Uh...

Keith: And then it wasn't good enough.

Ali: So that's — [laughing]

Keith: Wow.

Jack: One day we're going to buy out a theater and just show that video.

Ali: Oh my god, we really are. We really are.

Keith: [laughing]

Jack: Okay. Do you want to get your information on the screen? And Janine, you can tell us about your character. Are you playing the returning Never Watson-Wiley?

Janine: No. I'm leaving Never Watson-Wiley where she ended up, because she earned that. [chuckles]

Jack: Where did she end up? Briefly?

Ali: [chuckling]

Janine: She ended up, she, I think she's like working at the aquarium for a bit, and then is just like, really phoning it in.

Keith: Uh, Never Watson-Wiley is working at, and then was, was, quit from the casino. You were doing PR for the casino.

Janine: Oh, right.

Ali: Oh...

Keith: You just walked out one day.

Janine: I thought I had aquarium in my — there must've been like a big fish tank at the casino or something. Yeah, she's — she's in the wind.

Keith: You had a very paved parking lots moment, uh, where you —

Janine: Yeah.

Keith: Where you realized that you missed the zoo.

Janine: Well, I'm not playing her. Uh... [chuckles]. I'm playing, uh, Devin Zeller, who —

Jack: Oh wow.

Janine: Uh, Devin Zeller, uh, is — I mean, how, how much should I flesh out here? Like, obviously not, you know, but... how much do we want to get into it with new characters?

Jack: Uh, let's get like a one-sentence pitch. I think part of, part of what — and I think this is so interesting with Bluff, which is so much about the performance of characters in a story. There's something really interesting to me about Darren showing up with like a full backstory and understanding, because we've already seen him —

Ali: [chuckles]

Janine: [chuckles]

Jack: In Bluff City once.

Keith: Mm-hm.

Jack: And then next we have, uh, we have, uh, uh, your character, who, we have like one sentence of, because they haven't spent the time onscreen —

Janine: Yes. Yeah.

Jack: And they haven't built themselves up.

Janine: Uh, so... Devin Zeller is the daughter of a zoo manager. Uh, who, uh, gets, you know, it's, it's — her mother sees the zoo as a little bit of like, free childcare. Zoos, I should say.

Jack: Wow. And you have —

Janine: But she is a teenager.

Jack: Uh, and you have recently been elected to a position [chuckles]

Janine: Yes.

Keith: [laughing]

Jack: On the city parks department?

Janine: Yep.

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: Yep.

Jack: As a result of, uh, your family connections? [chuckling]

Janine: No, I, so [chuckling] I think that happened as a, I think Devin wrote her name in as a joke. But there was just no one competing for those seats.

Keith: Yep, that's exactly what I —

Janine: So she —

Jack: Wow.

Janine: Yeah.

Keith: Yep.

Janine: Yeah.

Jack: So — when you say she's a teenager, are we talking, like — so this person is now a, a, a city official. How old is Devin Zeller?

Janine: Yeah, allegedly. She's on a counsel, or she's on a department.

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: Uh, I think she's, she's like 15 or something.

Jack: Wow, okay.

Janine: Like, she's, she's in that age bracket where her mom still thinks of her as a kid that you can just drop off, and people will, will watch. You know, she, she, her mother expects her to sit there coloring, or whatever, you know? Uh, but Devin, uh, perhaps has a fake ID. [chuckles] And is in that sort of space of life.

Jack: Incredible. Are you — so, you [chuckles] your mother is on the — is on the board? Or the head of the board?

Janine: Her mother, uh, works at the zoo in some capacity, some like —

Jack: Oh works at the zoo in some capacity, sorry.

Janine: Like, some like, like a management capacity. But, I do think her family has connections. That's why a picked the last name Zeller. Uh, Zeller's is a famous Canadian department store that went under. Uh...

Jack: Oh.

Janine: And I [chuckling] to me, Zeller's is very Bluff City, but it's also very Canadian. So I, I think there's, it's just like, there's this like lineage of like, it's a family that was something once, and... you know. You, you can like, extrapolate it down.

Jack: Incredible. And, uh, the... your pronouns are?

Janine: She/her.

Jack: Okay. What's this noise I hear, over on the left-hand side of the screen? Is it just utter destructive chaos? Who's returning here, Keith?

Keith: Uh, hi. I'm Dax Leopard. Daximillian, Leopard.

Ali: [giggling]

Jack: Daximillian?

Keith: Yeah. I don't know if that's from, I don't know if it ever said that before, but it occurred to me that that's very, a good name.

Janine: Funny?

Keith: Yeah. Uh, uh, Dax is a, uh, former big cat zoo keeper, uh, currently, uh, you know, worked with some other kinds of animals. Uh, don't ask too many questions. Uh, he is extremely, uh, a bro, but also very emotional. Uh, uh, sort of like, uh, someone who you're not sure if they were in a fraternity in college, or if they watched, like, a lot of, like, uh, Terrence McKenna videos on YouTube, or Alan Watts.

Jack: Right, yes.

Keith: Uh, and it could go either way or it could be both. Uh, former best friends with Darren Cruiser, current status unknown.

Jack: Yeah, wow. Have you seen each other — oh, we'll play to find out what happens.

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: Just, uh, we've got to establish what the last 5 years have been like for the two of you.

Keith: Yeah, uh, —

Jack: But we don't have to establish that now.

Keith: Similar to Darren, very, sort of like, surprisingly ambitious. Uh, not out of like, sort of of greed, but maybe like a... or or not quite of boredom, but like, making things happen. Like, oh that's what, like, that's what you're supposed to do. You're supposed to make things happen. You know, if you're a zoo keeper, you're supposed to try and figure out how to land a million dollar deal, you're supposed to try to figure out —

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: How to get eyes on you, how to get eyes on the zoo, that's important.

Ali: [still laughing]

Janine: That's true, yeah.

Jack: [laughing] Uh, and where did we leave Dax Leopard?

Keith: Uh, Dax was fleeing from the law after having let all of the big cats free, into Bluff City [chuckles]

Jack: Uh, in real runaway animals type, if you saw our runaway animals stream —

Keith: [wheezes] Yeah.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: It begins with a, a, mysterious man in a hoodie freeing all the — with a monkey on his shoulder, freeing all the animals in a zoo.

Keith: Yeah. I only earlier today realized the, uh, crossover event of those two things.

Ali: Oh...

Jack: I feel like —

Keith: Sorry, I just saw the word facecast from, from lentilswede in the chat. Uh, Dax Leopard, uh, is the same age as Dax Shephard, the actor. The American actor. Uh, same age, uh, they look the same, except for, Dax Leopard has frosted tips, is not fully dyed blond like Dax Shephard is, just has frosted tips. Uh, and is, I would say, noticeably, uh, just a cooler, more chiller kind of guy.

Ali: Mm-hm. [giggling]

Jack: Excellent. Uh, okay. And, rounding out the crew. I am also bringing, uh, a new person to the table. Last time I played Boots Bonus, a, uh, uh, a beleaguered intern working at the zoo. Uh, he, uh, when we left Boots, uh, it didn't go well. It didn't go well for him, but it didn't go horrifically badly, compared to how it went for some other people. Uh, Boots got a very bad internship report from Never Watson-Wiley, who was not at all happy with his performance, and he went back to college and did not get college credit for his internship at Bluff City Zoo, during which, again, he was attacked by a lion. So, you know. Some bullshit. Uh, I am going to be playing... Dudley Brick House.

Keith: Four Ds...

Jack: Three names, uh, uh, — Brick House is, uh, his surname. Dudley is his first name. There is a space between Brick and House. As someone who has a space in their name — how the fuck do I change the font, once I've typed it in?

Keith: Uh, you just click on it so that there's, it's selected, but not typable, and then —

Janine: Using the arrow, the arrow tool to click.

Jack: Oh, I see. Excellent.

Keith: Right, oh, yes, using the arrow key, yeah.

Ali: Yeah, you have to go back to the... yeah.

Jack: Yes. Uh, Dudley — oh wait, sorry, I should also say, Dax has been elected to a position on the city parks department?

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: Wow.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: Wow. Do you want to say a bit about that, briefly?

Keith: Uh, we're going to make some big changes, uh, thank you for the vote. And... let's do this, 2023, or whatever year.

Jack: Or whatever year it is. We're not going to say.

Keith: Right. Whatever year it is, 20XX...

Jack: Okay. Okay. Uh, Dudley Brick House, uh, his pronouns are he/him. I picture, uh, what if Kurt Russell had to get really, like, uh, jacked for a role? Uh, when I think of Kurt Russell roles, he's generally pretty sort of like, lean and strong. But this is Kurt Russell in a movie where he has to like, lift a... what is Kurt Russell going to have to lift in the climactic moments of this movie?

Keith: Truck.

Jack: A helicopter, maybe? A truck? A truck, up into a cradle slung by a helicopter?

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: They have to get the truck out of there, and...

Keith: The, the, the truck is being lifted by the helicopter, but the helicopter by itself isn't strong enough to lift the truck.

Jack: Enter...

Keith: Jacked Russell. Kurt Russell.

Jack: Jacked Kurt Russell.

Keith: Who has to —

Jack: Russell.

Keith: Help the helicopter lift the truck.

Jack: Yeah, totally. Uh, and obviously does so, very successfully. Now, I think that when I think of Kurt Russell, he has The Thing hair, the hair he has in The Thing, in my head. You know that like, beautiful shoulder-length hair.

Ali: Mmm.

Jack: Uh, I think that, uh, Dudley's hair is close, uh, shaven close to his head, almost like a, a military cut. Keith, do you have any preference as to whether you are the small mammals keeper, or the reptile house keeper?

Keith: I have a preference for being a small mammals keeper.

Jack: Excellent. I have a preference for being the reptile house keeper. Because I'm the only one strong enough.

Keith: Wow.

Ali: [giggling] I do want to say, while it's relevant to the conversation, each time I get my hair cut, I bring a picture of Kurt Russell from The Thing.

Keith: [laughing]

Jack: Incredible.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Jack: How does that, do, do you —

Keith: It's beautiful hair.

Ali: [laughing] It's fantastic.

Jack: Do your hairdressers recognize it as Kurt Russell from The Thing?

Ali: Yeah. The, the, the one person that I've gone to, uh, has, has, has appreciated the, the vibe that I'm going for, so...

Jack: I would love that, if I worked in a hair salon —

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: And someone showed me. Well, because it would be, so firstly, it's an opportunity to think about The Thing, which is one of my favorite films, so that's nice.

Ali: Uh-huh.

Jack: And then secondly, I feel like it's really, it's — I'm being honored, right? Someone is saying, “Look, here is a very powerful look, and I would like you to replicate it.”

Ali: [chuckling]

Keith: Uh, what is... Dudley strong enough to do?

Jack: Uh...

Keith: That no one else is? Or is this just a mental, is this just the thing that Dudley has in his head?

Jack: Well... you ever see those lizards that do push-ups?

Ali: Mm-hm.

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: In the sun? They do like 10 push-ups to let you know that they're, I guess that they mean business?

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: Dudley's one of those.

Keith: Look how strong we are, we can do push-ups.

Jack: Is one of them. Not — no, way.

Keith: [laughing] A push-up lizard.

Jack: He's that, if he was a man.

Janine: Okay.

Jack: Strong, intense —

Ali: [snorts]

Jack: Can do push-ups.

Keith: Will show you, if he feels threatened.

Jack: Will show you if he feels threatened. I think that Dudley is strong enough in the reptile house to handle the big lizards, the monitors, the komodo dragons. Also — the crocodiles. I respect, earlier, that you said, snakes, we'll keep the snakes to a minimum. But since I am the one with the button... the snakes button, as it were.

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: He has got to deal with some snakes, sometimes, and he's strong enough to wrangle them, too.

Keith: Wow.

Ali: Mmm.

Keith: Very aspirational character.

Jack: Who is — for me? Yeah, absolutely.

Ali: [giggling]

Jack: Well, no, I think it would be — the most aspirational character for me is when Saint Patrick drove all the snakes out of Ireland.

Keith: Oh, okay.

Jack: That, to me is — except I'm not Saint Patrick. I'm like Siobhan, who is in Ireland in 1391, going, “Oh, all the snakes are gone! Great!”

Keith: Great.

Jack: Because I don't think Saint Patrick had a particularly great time of it. Uh... I was spotlighted in the same local news article as Darren Cruiser.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Jack: This is very exciting. Is this a play to find out what happens thing, Ali? Or do you have any thoughts about the kind of local newspaper article [laughing] we have been in?

Ali: [laughing] Uh... I, that's very interesting. Because, there's so much. It doesn't have to be zoo-related, even, right?

Jack: No. No.

Ali: And I remember that like, bad publicity was part of Darren's, uh, send-off on the last time. But it could be, I, I think I would prefer it to be something from, from Darren's, like, past, pre-leaving Bluff the first time. Uh...

Jack: Right, right, right, untainted by his contemporary reputation.

Ali: [giggling] But beyond that, I don't have any, like, uh... like barriers for what it should be.

Jack: Okay. So... I think we should discover this in play, but I, my soft pitch is that we've won a competition together —

Ali: Ooh, okay.

Jack: Or like, we were joint winners in a competition, and they both had to, they had to give the award to both of us.

Ali: Okay. [chuckling]

Keith: Best animal marriage.

Ali: Sure.

Jack: I don't think it's zoo-related, as great as that would be.

Ali: Yeah, it, my, my mind immediately goes to like, those contents where you have to like, put your hand on a car for a really long time —

Keith: Oh, hand on the hardbody?

Jack: Oh my god.

Ali: [cackling]

Jack: Those, but those are so deeply sad, that like, if this is prior to Dax, sorry, sorry, to Darren's sort of Blue exile, that to me feels like a post, uh, uh, exile.

Keith: It's called a Blue Exile because it was sad, and also because he went to Blue.

Ali: [giggling]

Jack: Yes, he — his Blue period.

Keith: [laughing]

Jack: [chuckling] Uh, I was thinking of, it's like, we both won... like, we both won a year's supply of something. Like, we both won a year's supply of milk, or something.

Ali: [giggling]

Jack: For some reason.

Keith: Hands on a milk body.

Jack: God, the idea of a year's supply of milk is so cursed. Because milk —

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: What? You can do so much with milk!

Ali: Yeah... I, I drank so much milk that year, bro.

Keith: You can make butter. You can make —

Jack: Yeah.

Keith: Ice cream.

Ali: I got an ice cream machine, bro. [laughing]

Keith: You can make whipped cream. You can make bowls of cereal.

Janine: You... most of the things that you're describing need cream. And sometimes it's in the name, that it needs cream, not milk. [chuckling]

Jack: Okay, Ali, I'm going to give you a pitch for, [laughing] for what we did.

Ali: Yeah, please.

Jack: And we did it at exactly the same quality, so they had to award it both to us. What if it's something like, climb the ladder fast?

Ali: [cackling]

Keith: [laughing] Oh, well one of you's strong, and you one of you is lithe, so...

Ali: Mmm.

Jack: What if it's like a boardwalk game, where it was like, how quickly you can climb this ladder, uh, and you and I both got exactly the same time. And they awarded us a year's supply — [laughing] how is the how, how does the prize and the —

Keith: Can I ask you a question? Is the, was — was the timing apparatus, was the stop clock they used, was it irresponsibly inaccurate, or was it scarily accurate, and, “Wow, we cannot believe how exactly the same they got?”

Jack: I don't know.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: Like, do they just have, they counted just to the second? Or, they stored, to the, to the —

Ali: No, I think, I think we both got up that ladder in like, 43.7 seconds or whatever.

Jack: That's so funny.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: That's a tall ladder. That's a very tall ladder.

Jack: Yeah, well... yeah. It is a tall ladder. And then at the end, they awarded us a year's supply of. I mean, well, milk is not related to ladders. Maybe that's —

Ali: Well, maybe it was, on the boardwalk it was like a big, it was like a big structure of a milk carton, and you had to climb to the top of it.

Janine: I kind of want it to be something that's like, a year's supply of something you really only get 2 or 3 of in a year.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: [chuckling]

Janine: Like —

Ali: Cranberry sauce?

Keith: [cracking up]

Jack: [laughs]

Keith: I do, I do like how disconnected milk seems from ladders —

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: In a way that is sort of Bluff, in, in that it's like, you know, “Climb your way to a year's worth of milk,” you know, or —

Jack: [laughs]

Janine: Have we considered that the promise was maybe a year's supply of milk, and what it actually is, is a year's supply of powdered milk?

Ali: Mmm.

Jack: Oh, shit.

Keith: That's cheating.

Jack: What if they is award you a crate — the, the — [chuckling] I don't want to get away from the liquid, is the thing.

Ali: Yeah.

Janine: Okay, okay.

Jack: I, I appreciate what you're putting down, but the thought of —

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: Just someone delivering Darren Cruiser like —

Ali: [snorts]

Jack: 3,500 pints of milk —

Ali: Yeah.

Janine: I'll — wait, that's not how you [laughs] they don't give it to you all at once.

Ali: Well, it would be, it would be like, it would be like 2 gallons —

Janine: You just have a milk man.

Ali: Yeah.

Janine: Is what that would be.

Ali: Or you have like a milk card. [laughing] Where you...

Janine: Like it's elementary school.

Jack: Well — [laughing] that's what it is.

Ali: You have to go somewhere and pick up your milk.

Jack: And I'm always there. You show up, and it's like, oh, Dudley's here too, getting his milk.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: Uh, okay.

Ali: Maybe that's the thing. It was like, it was like, it's really like an, it's like an ice cream company, or something like that, and you had to climb up on like a big, fake ice cream cone, and then like go down a slide or something, and that was the big thing.

Jack: [laughing]

Ali: And then every — now just once a week, we, we, in addition to our normal grocery shopping, we have to go to the like, ice cream factory, and like, pick up our milk if we want milk that badly. If we want free milk that badly. If we want free milk that badly. I'm sure there's, there's been a week in our lives where we've been like, I'm just going to pay the 1.29 for milk, because I don't want to drive down to [laughing]

Jack: Oh, yeah, especially because — I don't want to get too stuck on this, we should move on. But every time we pick up the milk, we have our picture taken.

Ali: [cackling] The Instagram of this ice cream company, or whatever, that's just like [laughing]

Jack: Darren [unintelligible]

Janine: They have to prove they're good for it.

Jack: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Janine: If you hold a competition and then you, and then people don't know who won, it erodes trust.

Ali: Uh-huh.

Keith: The cream of the top — ladder climbing contest.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: Climb your way. [chuckling] Yeah, that's what it says. Cream of the — cream of the top, ladder contest. Bluff City. Climb your way to a year's suppry [sic]— supply of milk.

Ali: [chuckling]

Keith: A year's surprise of milk, I think. [laughing]

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: You don't know when it's coming! [cracking up completely]

Janine: What if, I mean, no, but yeah, like, what if you go every week and it's like, okay, this week it's 1 percent, this week it's — it's whole milk. This week it's skim, this week it's chocolate.

Keith: [laughing]

Jack: [laughing]

Janine: It's just whatever they've got extra of.

Keith: [coughs from laughing too hard]

Jack: Or buttermilk. Okay. All right. Well, uh, I would like to, uh, offer up, do we want to briefly discuss the liar and the one with evidence? Or do you think that this is a situation where as the Fiasco develops, this will make more sense? What are we thinking?

Janine: I think we might have an answer for that.

Ali: Yeah, I would, I'd love to have a little bit of an idea of it as we go in, so I know... we sort of know which way to lean into.

Keith: Uh, I'm sorry, what was, what was — are we trying to figure out now?

Ali: The liar and the one with the evidence.

Keith: Got it.

Ali: Uh... I think the age difference here makes one direction funnier than the other. Uh...

Jack: Yes, I agree. Much, much funnier.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: I'm curious which one you think is funnier. One of them is definitely tropier.

Ali: Yeah.

Jack: Oh yeah, that's true. They are both —

Keith: The kid having the evidence that some adult is lying, that is —

Ali: Yeah, yeah.

Keith: That's like, tropier, definitely. Broader. But, yeah, I can see that — an adult blackmailing a little kid.

Ali: [giggling]

Keith: Is, is funnier. Okay. I got it. I got you.

Ali: [laughing] I, I, I meant it the tropey way, because I think it's a fun —

Keith: It is a very fun trope.

Ali: Version of a relationship, at least. But, I'm curious of what, uh, ideas Janine had, as the, the person who's really sparked this.

Janine: I, I could go either way. I definitely had envisioned it as like, Devin being the teen with a fake ID who's kind of like, up to some shit that her mom isn't aware of, and kind of sees certain people at the zoo may be as like rubes who she has to navigate to avoid blowing her cover, things like that. But, uh, that... that flips just as easily to, she saw Darren doing something. And, now uses, like lords that over him to, to... you know, to her own ends.

Ali: Yeah, I, I was initially wondering like, is Darren — if Darren is trying to get their zoo keeper, his zoo keeper life back, uh, is he going by a fake name? Is he, you know, trying to conceal his identity [laughing] in some way? Uh, but the thought, also, your name got deleted here, Janine.

Jack: Yes. It is not visible on our layer. It is only visible on your layer.

Janine: Oh, shoot.

Ali: Oh, it's on the stream. That's why I remember seeing it. Uh...

Janine: It said it's on the token layer. I don't know why you wouldn't be able to see this. It's extremely —

Ali: [laughing] But I do — uh, I do want to support the idea of Devin, like, not only being the boss's daughter, but like, not being like, “Oh, I'm the boss's daughter, so that's how I'm going to make connections within this zoo, to fuck around the way that I want to. But instead, I'm going to hide my identity, and pretend to be like a different person in some sort of official capacity,” is really funny. And then, Darren would not be the type of person to be like, “I gotta stop this kid.” He would be the type of person who's like, “I have to, I have to support animal integrity and enthusiasm.”

Janine: Mm-hm. uh... so, what was the pitch there?

Ali: Oh I, I was, it was to go the way that you had suggested it, which is that, uh, Devin has the, the fake ID, and is trying to pull one over on people. And there's —

Janine: Oh, okay.

Ali: Is, is chasing as you — [chuckles]

Jack: Wait, I'm not sure that I follow. So the liar is Devin in this case.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Janine: Mm-hm.

Jack: And, and Darren is like, “I'm not necessarily going to — I have, I know that she is a liar. But I'm not necessarily going to act on this explicitly, because I, I am remembering that, that period of my life where —

Ali: Mm-hm.

Jack: Yeah, that makes sense to me.

Ali: Yeah.

Janine: Also, I mean, I guess also, if we wanted to leave the detail as a separate thing that we work in later, versus starting with it.

Ali: Oh, right, right, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Janine: I don't know if that's, I don't know if we want to do that or not.

Ali: I think we can. There's no reason why not to. Especially since we're going to have the tilt thing in the middle of the game, where we're going to be reintroducing a bunch of new...

Janine: True.

Ali: Uh, things to this.

Janine: I do also, the more I think about it, the funnier I think it is that Darren is working at the zoo, like, under a fake identity, but Devin recognizes him.

Ali: [chuckles]

Janine: Because she grew up in the zoo, basically, because her mom was always dumping her off.

Ali: Oh, right, right, right. So you —

Janine: See what I mean?

Ali: So you remember from when I was like —

Janine: Yeah, she was, you know, younger, like, 11, or, I don't know, 12.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Janine: But because she was always at the zoo, she'd be like, “Oh that's — why does no one remember Darren?”

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: Oh, I guess because employee turnover? Like, it's just no one who was working with Darren is here anymore. But that's, that's Darren.

Keith: Oh no, Darren's not here, I would —

Janine: Sorry, I meant like broadly. Because, because Dax is obviously not going to blow his cover. Or is he?

Ali: Right.

Jack: Does he know?

Keith: I think Dax doesn't know, I think Dax doesn't —

Jack: Can he see through the cover? Yeah.

Keith: I don't think Dax sees through the disguise.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: Yeah. That's fucking excellent, actually. That's fucking excellent.

Ali: I don't, but I don't want to write myself into like a Brnine situation here, right? Because I'm already doing that.

Jack: Oh, that's true. Your day job is —

Ali: Tremendously.

Janine: Yeah.

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: The chat also points out that like, both could be true. They could [chuckling]

Ali: Right, yeah.

Janine: You know, they could both have fake IDs. They could both be lying about something, and be, be kind of in a standoff situation.

Keith: Oh, yeah, you could, yeah, you could both have evidence of each other, and you would blow your own cover by revealing the other one? Another, another good trope.

Ali: Yeah.

Jack: Yeah.

Ali: I feel like Darren's position here is less, like, I'm using a fake name and I'm really trying to hide who I am, but like, is, is not trying to be the face of the zoo anymore. Uh... and is also like, probably would not, like, be so... uh, eager to like, be in front of the press in that way. But like, probably, is still introducing himself to people, you know what I mean?

Janine: Mm-hm.

Project Zoos [1:49:33]

Jack: Yeah. Yeah. Totally. Uh... okay. I think before we begin, we should take a little break. But before we take a little break, I'd love to talk about the zoo. Because... it has been some time since we last played. And, uh... the word has come down from, maybe the city parks department, maybe the department above the city parks department, maybe the department above them, that what is needed is another zoo. Not a remodel of the zoo, uh, not a closure and putting in some new exhibits. We need another zoo.

And in fact, they're not going to close the old zoo. The old zoo is going to keep going. It's going to be the previous zoo, but a huge tract of land has been bought, whether or not that land has all been built on is another, is another matter. But land is ready for the expansion of Zoo Two.

Keith: Do we want to think of this as a sequel, or like a satellite zoo?

Jack: This is very much a satellite — I think, I think, so — I think what has happened is that, up in the management of Bluff City, the word has come down that a new project has been begun. And this project is called, are you ready for it? Zoos.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: Uh, I'm pushing hard for the Improoz the Zoos initiative.

Ali: Mmm.

Jack: Well, no. Actually, I'd like to workshop that slogan a little bit. Because what we're not necessarily talking about is improvement. Although of course, there is going to be improvement for the overall quality of life in Bluff City, as more zoos are built. But what we're really looking for is, this is Zoo Two. And we are working on Zoo Two, a satellite zoo. But with the amount of land that has been set aside, we could go right up to Zoo Six, you know?

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: Yeah, so it's less Improoz the Zoos, and more... [long pause] I can't do it.

Keith: What's the — what's the last word?

Jack: Zoos.

Keith: Oh.

Jack: It's got, we need to find a —

Keith: I've got it.

Jack: Mmm? Yes?

Keith: The last word Is Zoos.

Jack: Woah.

Keith: Yeah.

Ali: Mmm.

Jack: The Last Word is Zoos. Uh... and, uh, I'm not sure how, but like, we have been assigned to the construction and management of this first satellite zoo, Zoo Two. 2. Uh, is there anything else we want to hit about this zoo, going in, in terms of its vibe, uh, obviously, we will encounter this during play, but, uh, do we want to develop this a little further before we start?

Janine: I, uh... I think it would be funny, if this zoo was conceived of a little more — like, you know how some zoos have a section that's a little bit more, not necessarily hands-on, but it's a little bit more, like, activity-oriented, for like school field trips and stuff?

Jack: Yeah.

Janine: And like, maybe there's also like, “Oh, there's some goats you can pet.” Or like, at 2PM, someone shows up with a big lizard and everyone can touch the lizard. Uh... something like that, where it's like, this, you know, the, the zoo proper, is still —

Jack: Zoo One, please. Sorry. Zoo..

Janine: Zoo One is still — [chuckling] Zoo Prime is still, uh, you know, large and sort of more traditional. But Zoo Two has this element of like, interactivity, and like, getting up close, and like, you know. That stuff.

Jack: Yes, absolutely. Zoo Three, in the current plotting document, it hasn't started production yet, is: Zoo of the Night. Zoo Three.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: Zoo of the Night.

Keith: [laughing]

Jack: Uh, Keith, what's Zoo Four real quick? In the plotting document, of course. This haven't been, they haven't started, they haven't broken ground on this yet.

Keith: Uh, Zoo Four is Zoo Some More.

Jack: [chuckles] Ali? Zoo Five?

Ali: [pause] Zoo's Fine.

Keith: [laughs]

Ali: [snorts]

Keith: Uh, and Zoo Six is, Hell's Zoo.

Ali: [laughing] [snorts]

Jack: The, the planning committee has just written like, question mark, question mark, next to that, because they don't know if they can —

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: They don't know if this is something that they're going to be able to do, but there have been conversations, uh, about, can we do Zoo Six: Hell's Zoo.

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: Listen, those, those, those walk-through haunted houses are really popular with kids.

Jack: It is so —

Ali: [cackling]

Jack: It is so Bluff City that we started with Zoo, Zoo One, Zoo. A fairly normal Zoo. Zoo Two is a Zoo where there's more sort of interaction with the, you know, more community events, or outreach, more people being able to come and see the animals, be fed. Four zoos later, Zoo Six, we've gotten to [chuckling] Hell's Zoo.

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: [laughing] We've done all of the good we can do with some Zoos. Now it's time to do some bad.

Jack: Well, we don't know if Hell is bad, necessarily. I know, uh, I know at least one librarian who's from Hell, and she's excellent.

Keith: Whatever kind of spin you want to put on bad, like, “Ooh, this dude's bad.” It's bad. Hell is bad.

Jack: [laughing]

Ali: [cackling]

Keith: I don't care what the spin is, Hell's bad.

Ali: [cackling] [snorts] Yep.

Jack: So there's lots of, like, is there, like a robust education program, Janine?

Janine: Uh, I mean, it's still a new Zoo, so... robust might be a strong word.

Jack: Oh I see. But they're talking about that.

Ali: Well I like, I like the idea that this is the second chance at a zoo, right? And like, you also don't want to compete tickets. So, you know, if you want to go stand behind the glass, look at a gorilla go about his day, you would go do that at Zoo One. But here at Zoo Two, we keep a schedule, we have lessons, lessons is probably — [laughing] kind of a strong word.

Janine: [laughs]

Ali: But like, little lectures where like, like, like Janine said, someone brings out a lizard and talks about the lizard at a certain time of day. And it's like, oh, you want to be there at 2 o'clock so you can go to the lizard show. Uh... I like that idea.

Jack: I'm so glad that, that we are the correct combination of people to be involved in the more structured zoo.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: Uh, I have a little something for us, and I can get it here.

Jack: Oh. Oh.

Ali: Oh?

Keith: Okay...

Jack: What have we got?

Keith: Sorry, just a second. Okay, here we go. Uh, oop, wrong Discord. Okay.

Jack: Oh...

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: Keith, why are you putting that here and not in the Slack.

Keith: [laughing] Oh — ha!

Ali: [laughing] Go put it in news and updates.

Janine: Put it in the Slack! Yeah! Put it in news and updates.

Keith: [laughing] Yeah, okay, you're right, I've got to put it in the Slack, I'm sorry.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: I'm new to, I'm new to Slack, and, uh, at the, at the Parks Department they told me to stop sharing everything with the zoo, so...

Jack: Okay. So I think that this... uh, uh, sort of covers everything we need before we get started. Shall we take 5 minutes, and then return and begin act 1?

Janine: Yeah.

Ali: I'm going to, I'm sorry, I know that we said we were just going to, I just want to say, before we're done with the like, character-building part of this, because I didn't say a facecast for Darren. I've always thought of him as Darren Criss from Glee.

Jack: Oh my — that's —

Ali: You can look that up on your own, he's the like, he's the like, black-haired, like, kind of cute, like eyebrows.

Jack: Oh, yeah.

Ali: Just a guy, just a guy hanging out.

Jack: That looks like a guy.

Ali: [giggles] Importantly, my Slack Avatar is the picture from servaleveryhr, @servaleveryHR on Twitter. And it's, the, the tweet that they always make of the serval that looks like it took a selfie of itself, because it's like, so zoomed-in on the face. Uh... so, yeah. We'll see you in 5 minutes, everybody. Bye.

Jack: [laughing] Okay.

Keith: Janine, are you going to put the thing up in the chat for the, for the break?

Janine: What? What thing up in the chat?

Keith: In, in the news? In the Slack?

Janine: Oh, yes. Yeah. I just, I noticed there was animal drama.

Ali: [giggling] [snorts]

Keith: [chuckles]

Janine: Uh, so I had to check that out first.

Jack: All right. We'll see you soon.

Act 1 Begins [1:58:15]

Jack: Hello.

Ali: Hi. Hi.

Keith: Hi. The Last Word is Zoos.

Jack: The Last Word... is Zoos. It's time to begin act 1 of Fiasco. Uh, you know, what we have been doing so far has been, has been playing Fiasco. This is as much a part of the game as anything else. But this is the part of the game where the, the plot starts happening in front of the microphones.

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: Which is always a lot of fun. Step 1, so, Fiasco is organized broadly into 3, uh, sections. This is act 1, in which we are going to be using half the dice on this table. And when that concludes, we are going to roll some dice, and, uh, move into a period called the tilt, where based on the outcomes of the dice that are rolled, uh, we introduce some new, uh, uh, inflammatory element to the plot. Then we move into act 2, as we work through the dice again, with a slightly different, uh, a rule has changed that makes act 2 move slightly differently. And then finally, so I guess it's 4 parts, we go through an aftermath, where we total up the dice and colors. So both the value and the color are going to be important.

Uh, that we have in front of us. And using that, get an outcome that tells us exactly how bad things that gotten for our character. Uh, is there any sort of big structural stuff about how Fiasco plays that I am missing? Before I talk about how scenes are set up? Okay.

Ali: No, it's good, yeah.

Jack: Nice. So, Fiasco has, uh, really one mechanic that drives scenes, which is, fantastic. When it is your scene, your can character is in the spotlight, and you choose whether you want to establish or resolve the scene, before it begins. If you choose to establish the scene, you are in charge of basically, how it begins, where you are, who is involved, and what the situation is. You are the person maneuvering the camera to get the establishing shot, and putting the characters in place. However, you do not get to control whatsoever whether this scene ends well or badly for your character.

If you choose to resolve, you get to choose whether the scene ends well or badly for your character, but you don't get to decide what scene you are framing. The rest of the table are the people who make the establishing shot, and sort out who is in it. Uh... resolving works like this. All right, so firstly, we should move all of the dice back to the center of the table. Oop. I took the ocean world habitat from, from Keith's card.

Keith: [laughing] Hey!

Jack: [chuckles]

Keith: Hey!

Jack: Hey! Uh, now, do we reroll these dice? I believe we do, right?

Keith: Uh, no. These get rerolled at the halfway point. It doesn't matter what their values are —

Jack: Oh, yes, that's true.

Keith: When we hand them out.

Jack: Yes. At this point, the value is not important.

Keith: Exactly.

Jack: Uh, but now, everybody's dice are in the center of the table. I would recommend that we organize these roughly into two piles. So, we, uh, don't get — oh, they should be... yes, we should have two piles with an equal number of white and black die in each pile.

Keith: Oh.

Jack: No, it doesn't matter whether those are black or white. I just want to make sure that we don't accidentally blow past the halfway mark, does that make sense?

Keith: Oh, now I understand, yes. I thought —

Jack: But I don't think it matters, just so long as we keep that in mind, that once, uh, uh, 8 dice have gone missing from the center of the table, that is time for the tilt. In fact, Jason Morningstar specifically calls out something in the book that can happen is people just keep playing act 1 scenes, [chuckling] not noticing that it's time for the tilt.

Keith: Right. Okay. So, yeah, something to keep, uh, in mind then. Jack, quick reminder. We spent so long on the ladders and the milk...

Jack: Yep.

Keith: I have forgotten what — oh, animal, right. Duh. You're the reptile house keeper. I was like, what the fuck does Dudley do besides climb ladders? Uh...

Jack: [chuckling] And win milk.

Keith: Which is what people around you say about you sometimes. But...

Jack: I, yeah. I manage the reptile house.

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: Uh... the two facts that you need to know about me. I manage the reptile house, and I, at some point in my life, climbed a ladder —

Keith: Really fast.

Jack: Very quickly. Yeah.

Keith: A year's worth of milk, fast.

Jack: Uh... yes. Resolving scenes works like this. It is not done at the beginning of the scene, but either the person who is resolving, or the rest of the group, can at any point where a scene is being played, take a die and hand it to the person whose scene it is. If they hand them a black die, it represents the scene having a negative outcome for the person. If they hand them a white die, it represents them, uh, having a positive outcome.

Uh, it is recommended in the book that as little, uh, uh, is made of the, of the resolution being chosen, uh, and that it should just be, it should be played very naturally. And in the past we've, we've just like, looked down at the table and noticed that we have a black die in front of us, as the table has chosen how it's going to go.

Keith: Mm-hm.

Jack: Uh... once half the dice are gone, so we will, I believe, have had two scenes each, I think that's how it works.

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: Uh, we will take a pause and talk about the tilt, this sort of inflammatory midgame event, and then keep going into act 2. Any, uh, thoughts or questions at this point?

Keith: None.

Ali: I do think I prefer some sort of audible, uh, dice handing.

Jack: You would just like a, dice is ready —

Ali: Yeah, yeah, just like a, “I'm handing you this.” Because, like, between the Twitch and the Slack and the Roll20 and the notes —

Jack: [laughs]

Janine: Yeah.

Ali: And the rulebook and everything, it just would be nice to have like an audio.

Jack: Yeah.

Janine: I mean, I think we just say dice. Because it's a nice short word.

Keith: Yes.

Ali: Yeah.

Jack: Yes, I mention it because —

Janine: Die is a bit hostile.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: I think the thing that he's trying to avoid —

Keith: Die.

Ali: [chuckles]

Jack: Is midway through the scene, three players going, “Oh, what die, what die should we give them?”

Ali: Uh-huh. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Janine: Mm-hm.

Jack: Yeah. Okay.

Janine: I just realized, we all have D names. [chuckles]

Keith: Oh, you just realized?

Ali: You just realized that?

Janine: I — listen!

Ali: [cackling]

Janine: There's a, there's a Slack I gotta switch around, I gotta do OBS, I gotta make sure the browser window that the game, is, doesn't mess up.

Ali: [wheezes]

Keith: This is totally understandable, and even knowing what I'm about to say, it's still understandable. But, when it was Jack's turn, and they chose Dudley Brick House, I did yell — the 4 D's!

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: [chuckling]

Janine: I have as many windows open as we have dice.

Keith: Yeah.

Janine: On the table. So... listen.

Jack: Incredible. Uh... does anybody have a strong feeling for where to start? Uh, I'd like to read from the book again here.

Keith: Does Ali start? Because Ali had the smallest fish?

Jack: Oh, does that continue?

Ali: Oh, does it?

Jack: I don't know.

Ali: The player who grew up in the smallest town has the first scene.

Keith: Jack hates that, though.

Ali: Right, and then we changed the rule to —

Jack: Well, it's not that I hate it, it's just that it might as well as say, “Jack has —“

Janine: Yeah, we replaced it, we replaced it.

Jack: “Jack has the first scene.”

Ali: [chuckles] Uh-huh.

Janine: We replaced it with whoever grew up with the smallest... fish.

Ali: Which is still me.

Janine: [chuckles]

Ali: Okay.

Scene 1 [2:06:23]

Jack: Okay. Uh, the book says, sometimes Fiasco's cold start beginning can be daunting. You've got a situation that seems primed for fun. Agreed. But, how does this translate into action? The answer is to take a look at the character in the spotlight, and start asking questions. Always build a scene for the guy in the spotlight around a question you would love to see answered. What does he want to know about other characters, the world, himself? Do you wonder what would happen if he shorted his dealer? Does he wonder if lying to a cop is a good idea, or if lying on top of a cop is a good idea? Do you wonder if he has the balls to stand up to his dad? Sure, he got Chantelle pregnant, and now his baby daughter is an object in play — brackets, [charming], but what does she know that keeps a maggot like him from running out on her? Don't be shy. You have few enough opportunities to create scenes, so go big when you get the chance.

Ali: Yeah. Uh... the game —

Jack: Would you like to resolve — oh, sorry, go on.

Ali: The game is right that this is daunting. Uh, but yeah, there's, there's different scene types, right? Or is there not? No, it's just, you start a scene.

Jack: No, yeah.

Ali: This isn’t like a…

Jack: But you could also choose to resolve a scene, at which point it would be up to Janine —

Janine: Yeah.

Jack: And Keith and I to put you into a scene.

Ali: Oh...

Janine: Yeah, that's how it is. You get to either, if you, I think it's, if you create a scene, we get to pick a die for you. If you resolve a scene, you get to pick the die for you.

Keith: I think it's, you pick a die for someone else.

Ali: Okay, [unintelligible] scene.

Keith: When you... uh... when —

Janine: What?

Keith: Yeah, so —

Jack: No, uh, —

Keith: No? Is that not true? If —

Jack: What happens is, at the end of the scene, you pass the die you got to another person.

Keith: Right. Yeah, yeah. I think that's what I said.

Jack: [chuckles] Yeah.

Janine: Oh, okay. I did not remember that. It's been a while, man.

Ali: Mm-hm. uh... okay. Establishing a scene. We're at the zoo. Hmmm... I like the idea of there, like, needing to be... like a schedule to keep? Maybe this is, maybe this is like... the like... breakroom [giggling] not like the breakroom area, but the like quote/unquote, “Behind-the-scenes” area, like between the, the like lizard presentation show and like, a movie that's being put into the auditorium, of like, the great seas of New Jersey, or whatever. Like [laughing]

Keith: [chuckles]

Ali: The great waters of Bluff City.

Janine: Seas, plural?

Ali: Yeah, well... well.

Keith: [chuckles] New Jersey has, has 5 of the 7 seas.

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: Oh, did you mean Cs like, crab, carp, and chum or —

Jack: Oh, right, yeah, cod.

Ali: Oh.

Janine: Cod is a good one, better than chum.

Keith: Haddock.

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: New Jersey, the chum state.

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: Is it at least, there's like the shore, and there has to be like, at least a river, right? I know that Austin has described there being, there being —

Janine: That's not seas, though.

Ali: Sure. Uh... [giggling] But, I might have... said it incorrectly the first time. But isn't there a part of New Jersey where it's like, really brackish because it's —

Keith: Yes.

Janine: Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Ali: A freshwater river going into the ocean, ocean? Around where we are?

Janine: Estuary or something?

Ali: Yeah. Uh... yeah. The bodies, bodies of Bluff... and it's [laughing] people are like, oh, this is, this is like a murder mystery?

Keith: [chuckles]

Ali: No, it's about the different lakes.

Jack: [chuckles]

Ali: Uh, and... who...

Keith: And you, are you setting up this exhibit? Are you running it?

Ali: Yeah, maybe I'm like, setting up the, the like, uh, the like film reel in the back, or whatever. I, I've been trying to think of like, what Darren's, uh, position in the zoo should be.

Keith: Right.

Ali: And like, I think it might be interesting if he's not, like, hands-on with animals yet, if he's like a maintenance guy in this way, where he's like, he's like, uh... you know.

Keith: Probationary?

Ali: [laughing] Not probationary, so much as like, I don't want to go so far as like, “Oh, he's like a janitor.” But he could be, he could be the guy who's setting up the videos. He could be the guy who's, uh... uh...

Janine: Like an events coordinator? Not, like a full coordinator, but someone who's just like, run the machine.

Ali: Uh-huh. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Keith: You're tech, you’re zoo tech, you're on zoo tech.

Janine: Open the door at the right time.

Ali: Right, yeah. We, I, I like we don't have like, rides in that way. So I don't know that he would be like —

Keith: Not yet. Wait until Zoo Four.

Ali: [laughing] Fair. You know. He's the one cleaning up the little, the little, uh, cups after the, I don't know, I don't, I can't think of zoo exhibits tonight for season, which is really, which is really bad. Why would you —

Janine: Oh, the cups, uh, uh, some zoo — sorry, I don't know why I got so excited.

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: Some zoos, uh, will give you a little paper cup, and then you can fill it with million marshmallows and like, feed the deer or whatever from it.

Ali: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Janine: So, there could be...

Ali: Right.

Janine: Especially in a hands-on zoo, there's definitely a little, a little marshmallow vending situation.

Ali: Mm-hm. Mm-hm. And something has —

Janine: But I don't think they do marshmallows anymore, because it's probably not healthy for the animals.

Ali: Yeah.

Janine: But Bluff City definitely does marshmallows.

Keith: Deer love pellets.

Ali: Yeah.

Janine: Deer pellet — is marshmallows for bears? I don't remember.

Keith: Bears love marshmallows.

Janine: Someone gets marshmallows. Yeah, yeah.

Keith: Deer like pellets, and it tickles your hand —

Ali: What?

Keith: Almost as bad as ducks, when you feed the deer.

Ali: What zoo is giving you a marshmallow to feed to a bear? [wheezes]

Janine: You throw them down.

Keith: Bluff Zoo One!

Ali: [cackling]

Jack: Sorry, Keith, it's called Zoo, or The Zoo.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: Right, sorry.

Jack: We don't need the number. Uh, yeah, okay. So you —

Janine: Okay, here we go. I — so I literally, [chuckling] —

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: There's, this is actually, I just Googled it, it's — feeding marshmallows to wildlife. Is it — yeah, polar bears, where visitors allowed to feed polar bears marshmallows at the Washington Park Zoo. Uh, yeah, this is, this is unfortunately a thing. That I, it has been phased out, I think.

Ali: But this is not an eat from your hand situation. This is a throw into the tank apparently?

Janine: Yeah, you chuck 'em. Yeah, you chuck 'em down there. Yeah.

Ali: Because, I was, I feared the other possibility. But yeah, somebody has to make sure that the marshmallow machine is working, and is full of marshmallows, right? You can't have a... you can't have a kid walk up to the marshmallow machine, and there's no marshmallows in there. I think that's part of what Darren's responsibilities are. So... [laughing] with that spiel, does anybody else want to be backstage in the zoo with me? I think Dudley could be here.

Janine: Yes.

Ali: I think Devin could be [laughing] here. Uh...

Janine: Devin is eating marshmallows.

Ali (as Darren): Are you... are you eating those marshmallows again?

Janine: Hand in the jar, like, tossing them in the air and catching them in her mouth, like — yes. She is not even sneaking them. She is just here, she's watching, eating marshmallows, gives you a nod.

Keith: Kids in the audience see, that are a little younger, can see you tossing marshmallows and are like, “Oh, that's cool.”

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: Hell yeah.

Darren: You ever think about what's going to happen if the bears go hungry?

Janine (as Devin): Uh, you know, my guess is, marshmallows aren't their primary food, because this place is still running, and it wouldn't be if marshmallows was all the bears ate. So, I think they'll be fine.

Darren: But we only, we only, we only get so many marshmallows a month. I think they're cutting our marshmallow budget.

Devin: There's Kroger's down the street.

Darren: Can I have the marshmallows?

Devin: I'm not stopping you.

Ali: [laughing] Sort of grumpily goes to the like, I'm imagining one of those, like, uh, those like Costco-sized things of like cheese balls that you can get, but it's just marshmallows.

Janine: I was also thinking, that was why she's tossing them into her mouth.

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: Because I was picturing, I was picturing her like, that, that, that weird evangelical girl who has the like, cheese ball backpack, and she's like eating cheese balls as she's doing her tour, whatever. Uh, yes. Devin, in fact, does not stop you.

Ali: [laughing]

Darren: What are you even doing back here, anyway?

Devin: I don't have any homework to do, and, you know, it's... mom just told me to like, whatever. You know. My battery, my laptop battery is like 15 percent, and I don't want to just scroll, you know, Tumblr. It's fine, I just, gotta do something. What are you doing?

Darren: I'm refilling the marshmallow machines, which I gotta do before the 3 o'clock bird seminar. Uh... I gotta roll the cages into the back room, so the birds are ready for the show. Uh, and I, I have to, oh I haven't started the playlist yet, the birds might be upset for the show. Ugh...

Jack: I think, uh, the back doors of the auditorium open with a bang, uh, uh, Dudley comes down middle steps of the, of the auditorium, and says —

Dudley: Darren! I'm so glad I found you. Oh, hi, Devin. Eating marshmallows, huh?

Devin: Yep.

Dudley: Yeah, so, uh, I got the, uh, uh, the fifth graders, the whole party of fifth graders, for the bird seminar outside. And the, the, uh, I think I'm going to start showing them in.

Darren: They're outside already?

Dudley: What?

Darren: It's, there's still 20 minutes before 5.

Dudley: No there, no. No there's not.

Ali: And he's like, [chuckling] he's like looking at a wrist watch and tapping it over and over again. Uh, he's probably wearing one of the, uh, Dragonball Z Swatches that came out. [laughing]

Keith: Hell yeah!

Dudley: Woah, sick watch.

Ali: [laughing] It's probably the Vegeta one.

Janine: Devin, Devin says —

Devin: [sarcastic] Yeah, cool watch, Darren.

Darren: Yeah, thank you.

Dudley: Yeah, cool watch, Darren.

Ali: Uh, —

Dudley: Yeah, no, it's bird time, baby.

Darren: What time — what time — I —

Dudley: I don't know.

Darren: Can you — can you stall them?

Dudley: Well, I can stall them for, uh...

Jack: Like, he sticks his head outside, and like a carton of Fanta or something, like a plastic cup of Fanta just goes sailing past it and like, explodes against the wall. And he's like —

Dudley: Nope, they're coming in. Right this way, kids! All right, I want you to start filling up as much of the front as you can. This is, uh, Darren Cruiser, uh, who's going to be, uh, — you're —

Darren: [whispering] Dudley. Dudley. There's no birds.

Dudley: Yeah? What?

Darren: There's no birds.

Dudley: All right! Right up there at the front! Now I'd like you just to... uh, okay. I just, I'm just going to take a quick word to chat here with my friends. Can y'all keep yourselves entertained, kids?

Keith (as Kid): No!

Ali (as Kid): No!

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: [laughing]

Janine (as Kid): Ahhhh! Ahhhh! Blues clues —

Janine: Not Blue's Clues. Bluey. Bluey's the one they like now?

Ali: Uh-huh. [laughing]

Janine: Bluey!

Dudley: All right! Kids, so, we're just going to take 2 minutes. [aside] What do you mean there's no fucking birds?

Darren: They're — I didn't bring them over yet. My clock still, my watch still says it's 4:20.

Dudley: What, I mean, why would Vegeta like to you like this? This is... your watch is broken, bro. You've got to get a new watch, and you've got to get some new, some new birds or something. You got any animals back there in the, like prep room?

Darren: Well, they're back there, they're just — I haven't put on the songs yet.

Dudley: What?!

Darren: Well, the birds — the birds, before they come out, they have to listen to music so they're in the right mood to entertain. You can't just make a bird be an entertainer.

Dudley: No, no, no. You're telling me that we got the birds fine, no problem, birds are ready to come in.

Darren: Well they're, but they're behind the, the, they're behind the curtain but they're not ready.

Dudley: Oh. Okay. Well, let's just blast it. Blast the music now, get the birds onscreen, put on a show for these class of children. Aren't we right, kids? You want to see a show?

Devin: I'll go put the music on.

Keith (as Kid): [screaming] Yeah! Show!

Dudley: A-plus, Devin. You're doing great.

Janine: Devin runs off, is pulling her — fumbling to pull her phone out of her pocket.

Dudley: Look, I — look, I can see you're a little — I'm happy to help you with this, Darren. I know you're a good guy. I know you're good for the birds. And besides, look, I don't see what these birds need to be in the right mood to get entertained. They'll be fine. What — how does this show generally work?

Darren: Well, well — you come out, and you introduce each of the birds, and you make the bird say their own name, because they can all talk and they're all highly intelligent. Uh, and then, the kids all start asking questions about the birds, and sometimes the birds answer, but sometimes you have to answer for them. Uh... and then, uh, there's like a relay race between the birds. Kids throw up little peanuts, and it's great. It's fantastic.

Dudley: Sounds fucking incredible.

Keith: [laughing] Did you mean to say kids throw up? [cracking up]

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: [laughs]

Ali: [snorts].

Jack (as Kid): Yay!

Keith (as Kid): Yeah!

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: Does music start playing, Devin?

Janine: Oh, yeah. I'm trying to find, I was trying to find I really good song to start playing, but I truly think, uh... I, I — mmm.

Ali: I want it to be like a really long song. The song that I had in my head was, “May I,” by T-Pain, which is like a 12-minute long love song. [laughing]

Janine: I — I...

Ali: But if you have a different idea.

Janine: I think she got really into Jolene when it hit on Tiktok.

Ali: Sure.

Janine: Uh, and so I kind of, I kind of just want her to — there are so many songs that I could be like, you know, this is a cool song, or just like a very aggressive song. But I really just think like, something that's sort of like... clearly wrong. But also —

Ali: I love this.

Janine: Probably, she has the attitude of like, I discovered this. I discovered this song.

Ali: Uh-huh. [laughing]

Jack: Excellent. Uh... dice.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: Uh, okay. [singing] Jolene, Jolene, Jolene —

Ali: [laughing]

Dudley: All right, Darren, let's get them out here. All right, kids! Let's have a big round of applause for Darren Cruiser!

Keith (as Kid): [screaming] Yeah! Yeah!!!!!

Dudley: Okay.

Darren: Good afternoon, everybody. Are you ready —

Keith: [indiscriminate screaming]

Ali: [laughing]

Janine (as Kid): Jolene's my aunt's name!

Ali: [laughing]

Jack (as Kid): Jolene's my aunt's name! Are we sisters?

Keith (as Kid): My mom, my mom said, uh, she said that birds can fly!

Darren: That's true. And we're going to see birds in flight today, welcome to the bird extravaganza.

Keith: [cheering]

Darren: At the Bluff City Zoo's —

Janine: [laughing] Satellite zoo.

Ali: [laughing] Wait, I thought it was just called Zoos. Wait.

Jack: No, no, it's called Zoo Two. The project it called Zoos

Keith: The, the project to build 6 Zoos is called The Last Word is Zoos.

Ali: [laughing] Okay, okay, okay. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. But it's, it's called Zoo Two.

Jack: Mmm? Yeah, yeah, it's called Zoo Two. Yeah.

Ali: [laughing]

Darren: Welcome to the Second Zoo. My name is Darren Cruiser, and who's ready to meet some birds?

Jack (as Kid): Me!

Keith (as Kid): [screaming] I'm ready!

Jack (as Kid): I'm ready!

Ali: [laughing] So, as per the Fiasco... [chuckling] as for the Fiasco rules, I, uh, I've been, I've been given a black die, which means that this, this scene is going to have a sad ending.

Keith: [laughing]

Jack: Not necessarily sad —

Keith: Negative.

Jack: That's such a fun way of putting it. This scene's really going to tug at the heartstrings —

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: This is actually preparing everyone that one of these children is going to get hurt.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: It's, okay, it's a negative ending. I, Darren does not achieve his goals, I guess is the way to think about it?

Jack: Yeah.

Ali: I'm not sure how the game, what's the difference between —

Jack: Let's see. I want to see, how, yeah, how we describes, uh...

Janine: Jolene takes her man.

Keith: Uh, I believe that the —

Ali: [giggling]

Keith: The language the book used is negative and positive, and it's really just as a way to have two different kinds of dice to roll against each other at the tilt.

Jack: Yeah. Negative dice.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Jack: Uh, yeah. Okay. Right. I have a proposal. I think this is a 4-bird show.

Keith: That’s just [unintelligible] okay.

Jack: No, this is Jack. And I think that there are four of us. So, I would love —

Ali: [snorts]

Jack: I would love to get four birds, uh, in the Discord, probably in animal drama. I mean, in the Slack.

Ali: Uh-huh.

Jack: Uh... and then we can see how these birds get on, onstage.

Ali: Okay.

Jack: Uh... so let's, let's put them in animal drama, and we'll type them in at the same time, so we go 3, 2, 1, go.

Ali: Just a picture of a type of bird?

Janine: I've got to do some research.

Ali: Or...

Jack: No, no, just a description of a bird. For example, red parrot, or, for example —

Ali: Oh.

Janine: Can we do pictures if we want to?

Ali: Yeah.

Jack: Oh, of course you can do pictures if I want to.

Keith: Okay. I've got you.

Ali: Okay.

Keith: Which channel?

Ali: Animal drama.

Jack: Uh, let's put it in animal drama.

Keith: All right. I'm ready to go.

Ali: Okay, give me — I'm ready.

Keith: All right, ready.

Janine: Hang on, I have to switch to animal drama in the thing. Oh, also, I should clarify. I'm not in the Slack. It's, it's Devin's mother who's in the Slack.

Ali: Okay.

Jack: Oh. Excellent.

Janine: Yeah.

Keith: Uh, I spent so much time working on my profile in here, by the way, I don't know if anyone noticed my picture.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: Uh, I Photoshopped Alex Trebek outside of this, or out of this picture, and put a Leopard onto the Jeopardy stage, that's what this is. It took me a —

Jack: [laughing]

Janine: I'm scared to click it, unless your email shows up on stream. Uh...

Jack: Hm.

Keith: Uh...

Janine: If someone else could confirm that it doesn't.

Keith: So, on — it does, it will show up, but I don't know if it'll show up on mobile like, right there. Uh...

Ali: It didn't show up for me.

Jack: I don't think it will show up, no.

Keith: Okay. If it shows up, you know, whatever. I'll get a new email.

Ali: And neither does yours, Janine.

Janine: Wait, this — I actually can't open it, because the window's too narrow. So, oh well.

Keith: Uh... it says, Final Leopardy, is my name. He/him, and under pronunciation, it says Dax Leopard-y, and has, uh, sunglasses, smiley face —

Ali: [snorts]

Janine: Oh, there we go.

Keith: And then says, “Just kidding.”

Jack: [laughing]. Okay, are we birds-ready?

Keith: Yeah.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Jack: Okay. 3, 2, 1, go!

Janine: Wait, I was in the wrong tab. There we go.

Jack: [laughing]

Dudley: Okay, first out! Uh, uh, —

Jack: You, you pull the cover off a cage, and inside are 13 house sparrows. Uh, and the children respond as one, with a chorus of boos. These are birds that they see outside all day. One child starts chanting, “Lay an egg!” Like a, like a football chant.

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: [giggling]

Jack: And the, the rest of the children are just, just, just very unhappy about these birds. What do you do?

Keith (as Kid): My dad calls these trash birds!

Darren: Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

Keith (as Kid): [singsong] You have trash birds!

Ali: [wheezes]

Darren: These, these birds are an important part of New Jersey's identity. These are an important part of the ecosystem. Uh, this is the, the humble sparrow. And —

Jack (as Kid): Lay an egg!

Keith (as Kid): Lay an egg!

Darren: Well, they're not, they're, they're not comfortable because they're being yelled at, and —

Jack (as Kid): Make him say his own name!

Ali: [laughing]

Keith (as Kid): Make the zoo man lay an egg!

Jack (as kid): I was told these birds could say their one name.

Darren: Well, not... well, well, they have a beautiful song.

Keith (as Kid): Sing a song!

Ali: [sputters]

Janine: I'm sorry, I'm changing my bird. I'm defying the rules.

Ali: Woah!

Janine: I, I just have to.

Jack: I think that's allowed.

Darren: Okay. J — Jolene —

Jack: Jolene!

Darren: [singsong] Jolene, Jolene, Jolene —

Keith (as Kid): I would like the sped-up fast version!

Ali: [laughs]

Darren: I'm begging of you, please don't take my man.

Jack: [laughs] Bird, bird 2 comes out. Keith.

Keith: Uh, this is a bee hummingbird. It's a Cuban hummingbird. It's the smallest bird in the world. It's like the size of a thumb.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: And how does this go down?

Keith (as Kid): I can't see it!

Jack (as kid): Bird's too small!

Janine (as Kid): Why is it so blurry? Make it not be blurry.

Keith (as kid): Why is it so little?

Darren: Well it, I, I — the— quiet voices —

Jack (as Kid): My, my mom says, my — my mom has a Ford truck!

Keith (as Kid): Your mom's stupid!

Ali: [laughing]

Darren: Everybody, please, the, the this, this bird has small ears and small emotions, so please try to be kind, while we learn about the bee hummingbird, the smallest bird in the world. Isn't that crazy? It's the smallest bird there is. That's why you can't see it.

Keith (as kid): Oh...

Jack: Oh, winning the children over actually, here. Ooh! People leaning forward.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith (as kid): What's the biggest bird?

Janine (as kid): It's a bug.

Darren: The biggest bird is the...

Ali: Do I know this? Isn't there like a big... what's the biggest bird?

Jack: Is it an emu? I don't know.

Keith: Uh, an, an ostrich is the biggest bird, and the kori —

Ali: Oh, okay, an ostrich.

Keith: Is the biggest flighted bird.

Ali: I was thinking, like a caron? But that's not, that's not a... that's the — that's the one with the big ol' mouth, right? It has a big ol' mouth? The kori?

Jack: Uh... I don't know. I don't know.

Keith: Uh...

Jack: I have caps lock on.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: It's got a big, it's got a big throat, it looks like.

Ali: Oh, okay, okay, okay.

Darren: Uh... the biggest bird —

Janine: Next bird?

Darren: That we have here is, uh, our next, our next guy here, the, the... African gray parrot!

Janine (as Kid): Ooh!

Darren: Now, I can tell you this is the, the oldest bird in the, the zoo here.

Keith (as kid): That's the most boring parrot I have ever seen.

Darren: It has such majestic coloring!

Keith (as kid): It's gray. You said it was gray.

Darren: Look at it. It's, it's pink and, and red and —

Keith (as kid): It's white.

Darren: And orange.

Janine (as Kid): My dad's old, too. He's 34.

Ali: [chuckling]

Darren: Well this bird is —

Jack (as kid): Old dad! Old dad!

Darren: Is 84.

Keith (as kid): Old dad.

Jack (as kid): Oh. Woah.

Keith (as kid): Bird dad!

Jack: Does the bird speak, Ali?

Ali: I think so. Parrots can talk, right?

Jack: What does, what does he say? This 84-year-old bird, faced with an extremely tough audience of children.

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: [chuckles]

Keith (as kid): What's 2 plus 2?.

Janine: Keith, these are fifth graders.

Ali (as parrot): 4.

Keith: I've been playing these as second graders. I don't know how that, how I get —

Janine: [laughing]

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: [chuckles] These are just deeply rude, uh, fifth graders with a real understanding of a funny bit.

Keith: [laughs]

Ali: [chuckling]

Keith: Uh...

Jack: Uh... okay.

Ali: I think the bird says —

Ali (as parrot): My name is Joshua.

Jack (as Kid): Oh, whoa!

Keith (as kid): My name's Joshua!

Jack (as kid): Ho ho ho!

Ali: [snorts] [laughing]

Keith: All the kids look at Joshua and say, “Bird name!”

Ali: Aw! [laughing]

Keith: [laughing]

Jack: Uh, final bird?

Ali: Uh... and the final bird.

Janine: The final bird.

Ali: Yeah, what's this?

Janine: It is called an inca tern. It has a mustache.

Ali: Gorgeous.

Keith: Oh.

Ali: Beautiful bird.

Keith: Distinguished.

Ali: Fantastic portrait here. What was it called?

Janine: The Inca tern.

Darren: And everybody, welcome to the best-dressed guy here, the Inca tern.

Keith (as kid): Okay.

Janine: Apparently they don't like catching their own food. They just steal it from the mouths of sea lions and dolphins, which I think is sick.

Ali: [laughs]

Jack: “That's what I've heard too!” Says one of the children.

Keith: I like its flap.

Jack: This one has beautiful eyes.

Ali: Yeah. The little like, lip.

Keith: Yeah.

Keith (as kid): It's very soulful.

Ali: Yeah.

Jack (as Kid): Soulful bird!

Keith: [chuckling]

Janine: [laughs]

Darren: Now, yes, this is one of our most emotional birds in the, in the encagement that we have here. A reminder that after this, this lecture you can go to the, the big birds room, and spend some more time with all the guys up here. But who wants to see a relay race?

Jack: Oh, no. Okay. Now what happens?

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: I was like, “Where is the black die going to come into play?” And then I remembered that these birds have a relay race.

Ali: Yeah. And I was thinking that like...

Keith: 13 sparrows, versus a bee hummingbird, versus some sort of —

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: Some sort of, uh, some sort of parrot that definitely isn't an African gray parrot.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: Versus this, I can only describe as a small, medium-sized — this thing looks like it's, like, probably the size of a pigeon to me.

Ali: Oh, sure.

Jack: Yeah, it looks like Hercule Poirot.

Ali: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think the birds are just like, bummed out, from the...

Jack: Oh, because of Jolene —

Ali: [laughing] Because of Jolene.

Jack: A melancholy and slightly sinister song?

Ali: Uh-huh, yeah. And they're just not into it. And I think Darren's like, doing their, his best to pump them up. And like, clapping his hands, and trying to cheer the birds on, and trying to get the kids to like, engage with in cheers.

Keith: No loyalty.

Ali: But it's not, it's not working, because of the, the kids won't follow the chants. I think they keep making like, like [chuckling] different chants.

Jack: Slow bird.

Ali: Like, antagonistic chants.

Jack: Yeah.

Ali: Uh, I'm used to like, wrestling show chants, obviously, when you can say like, “Let's go, Derrick,” and then everybody else goes, “Derrick sucks!” [laughs]

Jack: [laughing]

Ali: So I think that's the vibe that the kids are bringing here. Uh...

Keith: Do you lose the bee hummingbird?

Ali: Do I lose the bee hummingbird? Do you think that it, it just flies off?

Keith: It's so small, it's tiny. It's the size of half of your finger.

Ali: [laughing] I feel like it would be hard not to lose, yeah.

Keith: It would be hard not to lose. It could get eaten by one of these other birds. I mean, a lot of bad stuff could happen to this bird.

Jack: I think, I think it just goes.

Janine: Or it's fine.

Jack: I don't think anybody knows where it has gone. And — like, in little straggling sad groups of 2 and 3, the kids are just leaving the auditorium. When they realize that their chants are only bumming the birds out more, and, and there's not any kind of — they're just leaving, slowly drifting off, unsatisfied, to other areas of the zoo, uh, until I guess eventually it's just you and maybe Devin? Dudley has gone off to fuck knows where.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: Uh, like, looking for a [laughing] hummingbird.

Keith (as kid): Better last year.

Jack (as kid): Shit zoo, I think.

Ali: Uh, that's the first scene. So I keep the die that was assigned to me because it's mine, it was my scene.

Jack: No.

Ali: No?

Jack: You actually hand it to somebody.

Ali: Have to give it to somebody?

Keith: Is that —

Jack: Yes.

Keith: Wait, is that not true if, if you pick your own scene? Don't you keep it?

Jack: Nope. It's for passing the turn. The player passes the die obtained to another player.

Keith: Oh...

Jack: I believe.

Janine: Oh, right. And the second half it's when you keep all of them, right?

Jack: You keep them, yeah.

Keith: I understand.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Janine: Right, so, it was the case that like, if you decide to resolve a scene, you get to pick your die.

Keith: Right, yes. The result is the same.

Ali: You get to choose the ending, yeah.

Keith: You hand it away, either way.

Janine: Yeah.

Keith: Oh.

Janine: And you hand it away in the first half, but in the second half you keep it.

Keith: Okay. Got it.

Ali: Uh, okay. In this case I'm going to give this to Keith. Uh, kid folly.

Jack: [chuckling] Excellent.

Ali: [giggling]

Jack: It's like the opposite of a contempt ghost for someone, just shouting kid nonsense in the background.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: It is the negative die, so it is a little bit like that.

Ali: Well...

Jack: Yeah, that's true.

Keith: Oh, that's good.

Scene 2 [2:37:45]

Janine: Okay. Uh... I... hm. I would like to, I think, uh... put forth a scene where Devin has, uh... Devin, you know, played the song, uh, and kind of... watched chaos unfold a little bit. But then got bored really fast, I think. Uh, and, uh, wandered to, where's Dax at?

Keith: Uh, Dax is probably going to be in Zoo Two's small mammal pavilion.

Janine: Oh, I know —

Jack: And do you want to establish this, or resolve?

Janine: Uh, I wanted to establish.

Jack: Okay.

Janine: Uh, Devin goes to the small mammal pavilion. Uh, she has a bunch of like, shredded documents, like, just [chuckling] you know just how sometimes businesses shred documents? I think just like, had at some point grabbed a fistful of that from a wastebasket in the like, employee area, and is going to the small animal, uh, place, to give it to some, like, degus or something as nesting material, like chinchillas. Just like, just to, just for fun, just to see how they do, interact with them. Uh...

Keith: And you've got a, you said you have shredded documents?

Janine: It's a handful of shredded documents, yeah.

Keith: Okay.

Janine: Uh... I guess, I guess maybe she like sees Dax, and says like —

Devin: What's up, councilor?

Keith (as Dax): Oh, hey. What's going on?

Devin: Uh, not much. The birds are sad. Uh...

Dax: Yeah, you here to look at the little guys? Why are the birds sad?

Devin: I don't, you know, just reasons that birds get sad sometimes. Uh... where are the chinchillas? Did you move them?

Dax: Chinchillas... uh...

Devin: Yeah. They're the ones that like, make beeps and stuff.

Dax: Yeah, I try not to tell them what to do.

Devin: Okay.

Dax: They don't like that. So they're definitely around. I think they're probably that way.

Devin: Oh, you just mean they're like, hanging out. They're just like, loose.

Dax: Well, they're — they're loose in a controlled way.

Devin: Did they get out, Dax?

Dax: They don't respond well to... direction.

Devin: Authority?

Janine: [chuckles]

Dax: Or authority. I consider them a kindred spirit. And they like dust baths, too. I like dust baths.

Devin: Uh-huh... you like dust baths?

Dax: Flop around in some dust, you ever do that?

Devin: No... you take showers.

Dax: I also take showers, but, you know. Spend enough time with the animals, you get some ideas. Flop around in some dust, and you're like, “Wow, this keeps the bugs off.”

Devin: You ever eaten a whole pumpkin?

Dax: I've eaten a whole pumpkin pie. Sick Thanksgivings, at my house.

Janine: [chuckles]

Devin: I — do you, do you like, need help to find the chinchillas, or are you, is it just like, fine?

Dax: Uh, I was — it's fine, yeah. They're fine. I can call them. I have a clicker. There's, there's a 50 —

Devin: I'd like to see that.

Dax: Okay. [clicking noises]

Keith: Do, I'm going to — unless we want to flip a coin on this, I'm going to say that the chinchillas, at least one chinchilla does come.

Jack: Excellent.

Janine: [laughing]

Keith: It's, it scurries up my leg, it's on my shoulder now. And I give it a nut, I have a nut, a pocket nut.

Devin: I thought you said they didn't —

Keith: A nut pocket.

Devin: I thought you said they didn't like being told.

Dax: I didn't tell. I asked.

Devin: Uh...

Dax: Here.

Keith: I give you the chinchilla.

Devin: Oh. Uh, cool, thanks.

Janine: Uh, I'm going to leave with the chinchilla. [chuckles]

Keith: Is this going to be a problem for me?

Janine: [chuckling] Unless you stop me.

Dax: What do you need the chinchilla for? What are you, why are you — I thought you just wanted to like, have it for a second.

Devin: Huh? Yeah.

Dax: Why do you have to leave with —

Devin: Aren't you busy? Like, it's just running around anyway, I can take care of it.

Dax: I'm... I'm in thinking more than doing mode right now.

Devin: … okay. I don't know what that means coming from you, Dax, I'm going to be honest.

Dax: I've got plans. I got plans this month, big plans.

Devin: Mm-hm. About what?

Dax: The zoo.

Devin: Okay, well then you don't — I'm doing you a favor.

Dax: Taking the chinchilla off my hands?

Devin: Yeah, you don't have to worry about it.

Dax: Is it safe?

Devin: Yeah, chinchilla.

Dax: Chinchillas are safe, and they have a good eye for danger.

Devin: Yeah. Like me.

Dax: Okay. I don't know, but, yeah, fine. Does your mom know you're here?

Devin: Yeah. I mean, she knows I'm at the zoo. She knows I'm at Zoo Two.

Dax: Right. Okay.

Devin: Probably doesn't know I'm in here, but...

Dax: Would you tell me what you're going to do with the chinchilla? I feel like I've asked around —

Devin: We're just going to hang out!

Dax: You're just going to hang out with the chinchilla. You have a handful of paper.

Devin: Yeah. I was going to give him the paper to make a little nest.

Dax: Okay. That's normal.

Devin: But if they're out, if they're out like vibing or whatever, I'm not going to like, make them go home, or whatever, you know. They can do whatever they wanted.

Dax: Uh, yeah. Do with the chinchilla what you will. But it might not like it.

Devin: Does he have a name?

Dax: They mostly just click at each other, and whistle.

Devin: Hm, okay. I'll workshop. I'll let you know if I come up with anything.

Dax: Okay.

Janine: Devin is going to leave with the chinchilla.

Keith: Yeah. That's fine.

Jack: Damn. And we don't have a dice yet.

Janine: We don't.

Jack: Uh, I gave the last die, so I, I didn't want to take the lead on die-giving.

Keith: I, I can give a die. I think that went well. I'm going to give, uh, Janine a white die.

Jack: Got a chinchilla.

Keith: Got chinchilla. For something.

Janine: Uh...

Keith: For hanging out with.

Jack: To, to hang out with, yeah.

Janine: Yeah. Uh... I'm going to give this to... Ali. While I think of a chinchilla name.

Scene 3 [2:44:55]

Jack: Okay. Now I think it's Keith, it's Dax.

Keith: Okay. Uh, this is right afterwards. I'm going to seek out Dudley. Uh... I'm going to frame the scene. And, uh... let's reprise our 3 health star, or 3 Star Health Cafe from the first Bluff Zoo, and meet in a sort of corner, over — I have square cafeteria pizza. They have like, slightly better than cafeteria pizza. And then Dudley, you're free to have some food or drink if you want.

Dudley: All right, Dax. How's it going?

Dax: Uh, it's good. I have some ideas, you ideas, new thoughts. Thinking new thoughts.

Dudley: Oh yeah? Yeah? Yeah, absolutely.

Dax: I've been laying the groundwork —

Dudley: Uh-huh?

Dax: And then taking care of the little guys.

Dudley: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Love those little guys.

Dax: I've been thinking, what is the number one best and number one worst thing about small mammals?

Dudley: Guys — about small mammals. The best thing about small mammals is that my guys love to eat them. They sustain them. Physically and spiritually.

Dax: No. No.

Dudley: No, I — let me finish. Let me finish.

Dax: Okay.

Dudley: Best thing: they sustain them physically and spiritually. When Ralph eats a mouse or something, not only does it travel into his stomach, down his long body —

Dax: Yeah.

Dudley: And sustains him. Crawling in the dirt, right?

Dax: Mm-hm.

Dudley: It also connects him, in his head, to the livelihood and the spirit of what it was like to be a little mouse, and this way Ralph can learn the empathy, can learn empathy. So that's good. The worst thing about the small animals is that it breaks my little heart every time I have to go and get some from your exhibit.

Dax: You... have got to stop taking animals from the exhibits. That is not what they are for.

Dudley: I... look. You've said this to me everybody time, bro. And I keep telling you what is my truth, right? Which is that I don't want to do it.

Dax: The breeders have a room, with 6, 7,000 mice, that have been waiting for you for months, to pick up, to feed to your reptiles.

Dudley: No, no, no, you've got it wrong. Those are your mice. Right? Those are your mice to look after.

Dax: If those are my mice, then why are you taking the better animals?

Dudley: Because they've seen the life of a mouse, so that Ralph can really get it.

Dax: They haven't seen the life of a mouse! They are... in a pavilion in a zoo.

Dudley: That's kind of the life of a mouse. Look, we're, we're splitting hairs here. What's going to happen is, I'll say to you —

Dax: I'm going to split your fucking hairs, if you go into — the zoo, and take exhibit animals and feed them to the reptiles!

Ali: [laughing]

Dudley: Bro.

Dax: I'm not kidding. I'll physically, physically attack you.

Dudley: I know, I know. I know, I know. I know.

Dax: Do — don't! Do not make me come — [groans] Oh my god.

Ali: [laughing]

Dudley: Bro. Bro, Bro. Let's fucking audit it then, bro. Because I've kept a list of the ones that I took, because I wanted to be up front with you. I wanted to be legitimate with you, right? About this transaction. So I made a little list, so I just think we could go down the list, now, and we can just figure it out.

Dax: Okay.

Dudley: Okay. Do you want me to start with most recently, or...

Dax: Yes.

Dudley: So, this afternoon, I took 12 chinchillas.

Ali: [snorts]

Dudley: Okay. This morning, I took 2 brown rats. This one, I didn't know what animal it was, so I drew I a picture. Do you know what this guy is?

Dax: That's a jerboa.

Ali: Aw.

Dudley: Yeah, okay, I got one of those. And then that's it for this sesh.

Dax: Dudley.

Dudley: Dax.

Dax: I have lived my life full of happiness and love.

Dudley: I'm so proud of you, bro.

Dax: And I have no qualms about coming out of that space.

Dudley: What? What do you mean?

Dax: To give you what you deserve. Do you not remember the election?

Dudley: Uh... which election?

Dax: You're, you're fired, bro.

Dudley: You can't fire me.

Dax: You can fire you. I actually literally can fire you.

Dudley: No, you can't fire me.

Dax: You're fired, bro.

Dudley: Fuck. Fuck, bro! You fucking fired me.

Dax: Yeah.

Dudley: Just because I, just because you took — which animal was it that was the most that made you want to fire me?

Dax: I can't tell you that, because... it is that even one of them, really, I think, someone —

Dudley: That's real.

Dax: That isn't me would have fired you.

Dudley: That's fucking real. That's real.

Dax: I let you get away with this two other times. You're fired. You're lucky that I'm not... going to jail over this.

Dudley: That's real, man. This is heavy.

Dax: Yeah. Go home, drink some fucking milk, buddy.

Ali: [laughing under breath]

Dudley: Oh, yeah, yeah, big talk. Drink some fucking milk. I fucking will, man.

Dax: Yeah, I know.

Dudley: I got good milk this week.

Ali: [cracking up]

Dax: Good. Good, you'll — you'll need it.

Dudley: I got that mid cream stuff.

Jack: We're now on the other side of the cafeteria, delivering parting shots to each other.

Dudley: I'm going to fucking drink the milk, bro. Good luck feeding the fucking Ralph. Shit.

Dax: Yeah, you're going to, you're going to need the calcium, I'll tell you that.

Dudley: Yeah, yeah.

Dax: Watch your back.

Dudley: Shit. I'm going home. I'm going to drink some fucking milk. Good luck with Ralph, bro.

Dax: Bye.

Dudley: Bye.

Dax: Bye.

Jack: [chuckling] Okay. Okay. Okay. Excellent.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: Uh... I think a fiasco is developing...

Keith: [laughing]

Jack: I'm going to take this black die, and I am going to give it to...

Keith: Oh, this is my, this is my scene.

Jack: Oh, yeah. Oh, wait, oh, right. Ali took — gave the die. Okay, yes, excellent. So Keith, you get to —

Ali: Oh, my bad. I put it by Jack's name even though it was Keith's scene.

Keith: Yeah. So, so I've got a second black die?

Ali: Mm-hm.

Jack: But you can give it to someone.

Ali: Yeah, just —

Jack: You have to give it to someone.

Keith: I have to give it to someone. I'm going to [chuckling] pass it to Jack.

Jack: [chuckling] There you go.

Ali: [giggles]

Scene 4 [2:52:34]

Jack: Okay. So now it's my turn. Uh... I'm going to also establish, this is tough, because we've all been establishing scenes so far, and Fiasco gets just as good when you choose to resolve scenes and let other people put you in the soup, as it were. But I have a very specific idea, uh, that I want to make sure that I hit. It is 3 o'clock in the morning. The lights are low, in the aquarium, in the specialist exhibit. The specialist exhibit is called, “Rich Fish.”

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: [laughing]

Jack: Now, you might be wondering — is this an exhibit — is this called this because owning the fish makes you rich? No. It is not so. It is because this is an exhibit of fish who have been the beneficiaries — whoa, I didn't mean to do that — who have been the beneficiaries of wealthy people's wills. These are fish that have money left to them. Uh, there was a brief fad in Bluff City, some, I don't know, 40 years ago, where people thought it was very cute and quaint to leave money to animals in your will, you know, like, oh, everything is going to go to the cat. And within that, there was a spate of fish being left, of money, estates being left to fish. Uh, and this is an exhibit of those fish.

It's 3:30 AM, and Darren Cruiser discovers Dudley Brick House leaning over one of the tanks, with a net. Why are you in the aquarium at 3:30? And what do you do?

Ali: I'm in the aquarium at 3:30 because I had a really long, I had a bad day, and I wanted to find some inner peace. So, I still, I have the keys to the, uh, the zoo in case there's any mechanical emergencies. So [chuckling] I snuck back in. And also my watch is broken, and, uh, I... was playing a bunch of Counterstrike.

Jack: [laughs]

Ali: [wheezes] I thought it was only like 2 hours, and it was maybe like 4 or 5. So now I'm in the aquarium at 3 AM. And I walk in, and, uh, I go —

Darren: Woah!

Jack: I hide the, the net behind my back, turn around really quickly.

Darren: What's the Dudster doing here? Hey man?

Dudley: Oh, it's the milk man! It's the milk man. Hey, bro.

Darren: It's my milk buddy.

Dudley: Milk buddies. How's it going?

Jack: And then we do our handshake, where we bump our fists together like a fist bump, and then we mime, like we're drinking a glass of milk.

Ali: Yes, we do.

Jack: And then we go, “Calcium!”

Ali: [laughing] I, I wipe off my imaginary milk mustache.

Jack: Milk mustache... I leave mine on, because I have a mustache in real life.

Ali: Uh-huh, uh-huh. And I say [laughing]—

Darren: Nice mustache, bro.

Dudley: Thanks, bro. Climbed any ladders lately? Hah, just kidding. What are you doing here? It's, it's late.

Darren: Well, you know, I just wanted to look at the colors a little bit. What are you doing?

Dudley: Oh, I just thought I'd check in with these rich fucking fish. You know, man?

Darren: Yeah, yeah. Yeah, man. Imagine being a rich fish.

Dudley: Oh my god.

Darren: Hoo!

Keith: And when you say rich fish, lights start flashing, they — a pre-set light show, when someone says, “Rich fish,” that goes off of. There's like an arcade, like you won a jackpot noise, maybe casino. Casino you won a jackpot noise.

Ali: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Keith: And, and there's a, a choreographed light show that dances across all the different mini-aquariums, also.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Keith: Rich fish! [jackpot win noises] Everywhere.

Ali: [giggling]

Dudley: They don't even, they don't even know, man. That they're rich.

Darren: No.

Dudley: They just get to live the life. Oh, you think they know?

Darren: They might know. Look at the way they're swimming around. You don't, you don't think they're showing off to all these other fish?

Jack: Oh god. Dudley just starts, like, sobbing.

Ali: [laughing] Oh my god.

Darren: Hey, buddy...

Dudley: Fucking look at 'em, bro.

Darren: Hey, buddy.

Dudley: It's been a hard day, man.

Darren: Oh, it's been an awful day, man.

Dudley: You had a hard day?

Darren: Yeah, you were — you were at that bird thing.

Dudley: I forgot about the fucking bird thing. You find that little shit?

Darren: Sure didn't. It'll be back, though. It'll be back. It'll be back.

Dudley: Do they do that?

Darren: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dudley: They come back?

Darren: They gotta, right?

Dudley: Ugh. Fucking Dax fired me.

Darren: You got — wait. You got fired?

Dudley: Yeah.

Darren: Dax fired you? Dax wouldn't fire you. You're Dudley.

Dudley: He fucking fired me over the pizza. Dudley Brick House. If —

Darren: Over the — what pizza? Pizza has nothing to do with zoos.

Dudley: No, we were having a pizza. We were sitting over a pizza, he was going to, he was going to like, tell me about his scheme, and I fucking ruined it, man. He had like a scheme.

Darren: He had a scheme?

Dudley: He had, like, a plan, man.

Darren: Yeah, that's Dax, man. He's got great plans. He wouldn't fire you.

Dudley: He fucking fired me. I told him —

Darren: Did he say why?

Dudley: Yeah, yeah, it was — I'd been feeding his animals to my animals.

Ali: [laughs]

Darren: Okay, buddy. Wait. Milk man —

Dudley: Yeah?

Darren: Wait a second, milk man. You —

Dudley: Yeah?

Darren: You've been doing that?

Dudley: Well, yeah. But just like —

Darren: I'd fire you, man. What are you doing?

Dudley: A bit — no, don't say that, bro. It was just a few chinchillas, bro. And —

Darren: That's —

Dudley: Ralph was hungry.

Darren: But chinchillas are bread and butter. People love them.

Dudley: Yeah, they were fucking bread and butter to Ralph. He loved 'em.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: [cracking up]

Dudley: Look, I just, I can't, I cannot overcome my misdeeds, bro. I apologized —

Darren: Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Look at me.

Dudley: Yeah?

Ali: I put my hand on your shoulder and I like, almost lean my forehead against yours.

Darren: You can always overcome your misdeeds, bro. And we're going to make this right.

Dudley: Yeah. That's what I'm thinking, bro.

Ali: [laughing]

Dudley: That's what I'm thinking. So you need to help me steal this fish.

Darren: Hey... what?

Dudley: No, no, look, bro, it's, it's, it's, it's all set up. I'm going to fucking walk you through it, bro.

Darren: We could just get your job back.

Dudley: No, I — what? No, this is how I get my job back, bro. It's fucking piss-easy, dog. See this fucker? He's worth 120,000 dollars.

Jack: Cut to, just beautiful-looking fish. In the TV show, this is just like a smash cut, the fish swimming around.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: This is a... god, what does this fish look like? Uh, if only there was a podcast that talked about a lot of different tropical fish.

Ali: Mmm.

Jack: All sorts of fish.

Keith: Uh, I can't, I won't tell you this is what it is, but in my head, this is the rainbow fish from that kids' book, The Rainbow Fish.

Ali: Oh, yeah.

Jack: [laughs] Yes, yes. I think I know what type of fish this is. Uh, this is an — so, this thing is, this is a very beautiful fish, but the reason it's worth 120,000 dollars is that, like, someone has bequeathed... you know. 120,000 dollars.

Ali: It was a beloved fish.

Keith: Right, it has a, it has a net worth. It's not worth —

Ali: Can it, can it be like, can it be like a fish that... won a blackjack game or something?

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: Please.

Jack: Talk me, talk me through it, please talk me through it.

Keith: [cracking up]

Jack: I don't know what the fuck you mean. [chuckling] Tell me.

Janine: No, I see it, I get it. I get it.

Keith: Yeah, I also get it. Yeah, I can see that.

Ali: [cackling]

Jack: No, I have to hear you say it, Ali. I don't know what you mean.

Ali: [laughing] It's a novelty, it's like an event at the... it was like a casino/zoo tie-in, you know, or —

Keith: Oh, this is a tax scam. That's a tax — you say, the casino runs an event where it says, “Oh, the fish are going to, are going to play.”

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: And then we donate the winning fish, that we have now created 100,000 dollars worth of value out of, and then they donate it, and write off 120,000 dollars.

Ali: Oh...

Janine: I think if I fish was going to play any game at a casino, blackjack is the one, because —

Keith: Yeah.

Ali: Yeah.

Janine: You, you know, like —

Keith: Because the fish would know when to hold 'em.

Janine: Because if it like, if it like tips down to look at the cards, that means hit me, you know?

Ali: Uh-huh.

Jack: Yeah.

Ali: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh-huh.

Jack: Yeah, absolutely. Uh, I've posted a picture of the fish in animal drama. This is a betta —

Ali: Oh, yeah.

Jack: Uh...

Janine: I mean, we know it's a bettor [pronouncing it like “betta” in imitation of Jack's accent] because it won at blackjack, but what kind of fish is it?

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: [cackles]

Jack: Oh my god. Uh, kaylee_rowena in the chat says, “Entering the Friends at the Table animals hustling people at betting games cinematic universe, alongside the cows that play pool.” I have no memory of...

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: [laughs]

Jack: When did the —

Keith: That sounds, I'm pretty sure you're thinking, sorry are you thinking Friends at the Table or are you thinking of Gary Larson? I think you're thinking of The Far Side.

Janine: Cow pools.

Keith: [laughing]

Jack: When did we make cows that play pool? [laughing]

Ali: I have, I have no clue.

Janine: I don't remember. [chuckling]

Jack: It sounds like the sort of thing we would do.

Ali: I actually have no idea.

Jack: Oh, it's from the cowboy game with the pies, apparently.

Janine: [laughing] I don't know what that —

Keith: I don't know what that is.

Ali: Oh, that was, that was — yeah.

Janine: I think I was in that, and I don't know what that is.

Ali: [giggling]

Jack: Oh, it was from the National Network Of Abortion Fund fundraiser.

Ali: Yeah. Uh...

Jack: Oh god. Okay. Yeah. So we just smash cut to this fish.

Dudley: Yeah, bro. Look, I'm going to spell it out to you. I'm going to spell it out to you, man, and I need you to — look, milk brothers never die?

Darren: Yeah, I mean —

Dudley: Milk, milk brothers never die?

Darren: Milk, milk is stronger than blood.

Dudley: Milk is stronger than blood, man. Here's what we do. This little fucker's worth 120,000 dollars, won it in a poker game. I'm going to scoop him out with this, and I'm going to put him in this.

Jack: And he holds up, like, a tub. Uh, it is an empty ice cream tub, than on the front, it says, “Mint Choc Chip, “ comma, “Delicious!” Exclamation point. And this is from the same ice cream company that did the fucking milk promotion.

Dudley: I'm going to put him in here.

Darren: betta fish need 5 gallons, man. And that's on the low end. They really need like 20.

Dudley: Yeah. But I was out at Terry's, you know? Terry's fish zone, the fish supply store?

Darren: Oh, you can't go to Terry's, you gotta go to Jerry.

Dudley: Too late, bro! I went to Terry's and I got a 20 gallon tank, bro.

Keith: The divorce was rough on them, but it was even rougher on this town.

Ali: [laughing]

Dudley: You think, really? Look at me, look at me. Do you think that you wouldn't know how to take care of one of these little fucks? He's just in this ice cream, man. Let's get him home.

Darren: Well, it's like — can I be real with you?

Dudley: Yeah, of course — always, you can be real with me.

Darren: It's, it's, it's like you're looking at this fish and seeing dollar signs, and not a fish. And I don't know that that sits right with me.

Dudley: Fuck, man.

Jack: And he like, slips down with his back to the thing, holding this fish in the little —

Ali: [snorts] [laughing]

Jack: Tub in front of him.

Dudley: Fuck, you're so right. But I can't put him back in, man. How do we get him out of here? Okay, I'll explain step two of my plan, bro.

Darren: You just —

Dudley: And then we'll see how it sounds, right? Oh, no, the fish is missing.

Darren: You just put him back.

Dudley: No, man. Because here's how it works. Listen. Oh, no, the fish is missing. No, no, no. No.

Darren: The fish is missing.

Dudley: He's worth 120,000 dollars, man. He's the centerpiece of this exhibit. The fish is missing? No. And then... I fucking get the fish back for them.

Darren: They, but the, but the...

Dudley: And then they give me my job back.

Darren: But, but we, we can ask, you know.

Dudley: What do you mean ask?

Darren: Well you just, you, you go to, you go to Bluff City Zoo's — bluffcityzoo.com slash zoos —

Dudley: Bro, I can tell you're overwhelmed.

Darren: Comma —

Keith: [cracking up] Hey, what was happening about 8 minutes before this conversation?

Ali: [laughing]

Darren: Comma, comma — opportunities... and you just apply for another job, man.

Dudley: No. They won't fucking let me in. You should have seen the look in Dax's eye. You know, he's a calm dude. But he was fucking flamed.

Darren: I mean he's, he's, a passionate guy, bro.

Dudley: Yeah, so the only way back. This is the only way back in. Look... look. Maybe you should... look.

Ali: Has Jack been assigned two dice? Or is that something that you had?

Jack: No, my white die is the one I've been assigned.

Ali: Okay.

Jack: We got a white die on this scene.

Ali: Okay. So that means I... finish your sentence. [chuckles]

Dudley: Look, bro. I mean, I can't do this alone, man. And you clearly know about, the like, pastoral side of this shit. You know how to make this fish —

Darren: Yeah, I love pastels, bro.

Dudley: No, not like — yeah. So like... milk brothers? I'll handle... the job.

Darren: [sighs] You climb a sick ladder, bro, I guess I can't. You gotta work here, man.

Dudley: Yeah. Yeah.

Darren: This isn't going to work without you here.

Dudley: Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

Darren: You're going to take — you, you have a 20-gallon tank set up?

Dudley: Yeah, but I'm going to need you to come by and make sure that little fuck's doing okay, man. That's what I need you for.

Darren: Okay, how long is, when did you fill the tank up with water?

Dudley: What? Before I just came out, like 2 hours ago.

Darren: Well, you — okay, then — it needs to — it's got to sit there for like 2 days, man. It's got to deoxidize.

Dudley: Fuck, man. Okay. Look, so you come home with me, we'll swing by Jerry's — I mean, yeah, Jerry's, right? That's the one I should go to?

Darren: Just — oh, yes.

Dudley: That's a 24-hour fish supply store. I'll pick up —

Keith: [chuckles]

Dudley: I'm sure he's got a spare tank in the back that, that this little fuck can stay in for like, until my tank's ready. And then we'll put it in there.

Darren: Yeah. Okay, okay, you know what? I trust Jerry with that. You know, okay. Okay. Okay. I've, I've kept fish with him before, so I think this — okay.

Dudley: Yeah.

Darren: This is the only way?

Dudley: It's the only way that makes sense, man. This is just, this is the truth of it.

Darren: Milk for life, brother.

Dudley: Milk for life, brother.

Ali: [chuckling]

Jack: Okay. I'm going to take a positive die here. Uh, which was, which was given to me, having stolen the fish. Yeah, and it just cuts to us, uh, playing Counterstrike in my house with an empty 20-gallon tank behind us, and then cuts to the fish, swimming slowly in, at the back of Jerry's. Uh, I'm going to give this white die to... the recently chinchilla-ed, the, the last surviving chinchilla owner, Devin.

Janine: Thank you.

Ali: Sorry, I had to be mad in the chat for a second about proper betta fish care. [laughing]

Jack: Yeah, this is a personal fish to you, right, Ali? You've kept bettas, haven't you?

Ali: I... I don't think so. I keep thinking about getting one, but then I'm like, “Oh, I don't feel like invest —“ I don't have somewhere to put it in my apartment, but also I don't know how to, I don't — my dream is to get a betta and like, actually put it like a 10-gallon tank like you're supposed to for them, and not like, like a vase that people famously do.

Janine: Yeah, that's the same thing that happens to goldfish, right? Where people are just like, “It's fine if you just put it in a bowl with nothing else in it, it'll, it's happy. They don't have memories.” It's like... they do.

Ali: [laughing] Yeah.

Keith: I, I know people that have learned that betta fish, uh, don't do well in small amounts of water. They just technically won't die. Uh, which is why they're very popular, because they're kind of hardy, like in a sense.

Ali: Sure.

Keith: Uh... uh, they live a long time, and if they don't have anything like dangerous in the cage, they can live, even if they're unhappy. Uh, but people who have moved their, have been convinced to move their betta fish into bigger containers, and they like... literally go from being like, gray and dull blue to being like, bright colors and very healthy and happy-seeming. It's noticeable, you can notice.

Scene 5 [3:11:00]

Ali: Mm-hm. Anyway, it is my scene, so I have more important things to focus on, like to setting one up. Uh...

Jack: Yeah, just to clarify, I'm handling the criminal side of the job, and I've roped you into handling the pastoral care of the fish.

Ali: [laughing] Yeah, because I, I, I would not let you mishandle the fish.

Jack: Yeah.

Ali: The, the right, the wrong guy at the right time, for that, for that fish, as far as the fish is concerned. Uh... but, yeah. Uh...

Keith: Uh, Darren did not seem phased by, uh, hearing about Dax. I'm curious now what this relationship is.

Ali: Well... I said that you were passionate.

Keith: Yeah.

Ali: I, I, I was surprised that you would fire somebody. I —

Keith: You were not surprised that I had a plan.

Ali: I was not surprised that you had a plan. And I defended your reason for the firing, once I heard it.

Keith: Yes. Yeah.

Ali: So... [chuckling]

Keith: I'm just saying, it, it seemed like maybe we've hung out since you've been back, but I'm not sure. I still don't know.

Ali: Yeah. Uh... do you want to, do you want to figure that out here, on the, the playing field, as it were? [laughs]

Keith: Yeah, I'm totally, yeah, I'm totally willing to do that.

Ali: [chuckling] I think maybe it can be the next morning. Uh... I don't know if you, you've taken a look at the news and updates in our Slack channel. [laughing] But maybe, uh, maybe that's, that's the, this scene. It's another scene in this sort of cafeteria. I think Darren has ordered a smoothie, watchless, unfortunately. Uh, and I think he, he saunters over and is like —

Darren: Yo, you see the Slack, bro?

Dax: Slack?

Darren: Yeah, you've — you look in on the chat? Did you hear about that fish?

Dax: Oh, the Slack.

Keith: I put away the gold Razr that I still have, and I take out the, uh, uh, iPhone10-6 that Boots gave me 5 years ago. It's got a cracked screen —

Ali: [chuckling]

Keith: No case. And it gets 2 hours of battery life a day, and I check the Slack and I read that BJ the betta fish, worth 120,000 dollars, has gone missing from the rich fish exhibit. Dollar sign for the S's.

Ali: [giggling]

Keith: “We have checked the other fish and the floor around the tanks thoroughly to make sure that there were no oopsies. Security hasn't reported any suspicious movement or trespassers, but we are reaching out to BCPD and our insurance company for next steps. Please reach out to me or anyone in management if you have any information. Thank you. I know we are all very upset. We will have a counselor coming in tomorrow” [laughing], “for those who need one.”

Dax: Oh my god.

Darren: Yeah. That's, that's —

Dax: It's been a rough, it's been a rough couple days at the zoo. And I hate, I hate saying that.

Darren: I know, man. Zoos are supposed to be all peace and joy, and it's just been all, it just feels... I, I don't know, man. Have you fired somebody?

Dax: Yeah, I fired Dudley!

Darren: Yeah...

Dax: He fed like, 80 animals to the lizards, or whatever..

Darren: Yeah, I heard about — but, you know... the lizards need a good diet. You know?

Dax: They don't — they don't need exhibits. The eat other, they have other, they eat — I mean, a lot of these animals are supposed to be eating like steaks and chicken. Butchered meat.

Darren: Yeah, yeah. Yeah...

Dax: I've been in that department. I know that there's a whole kitchen for those animals, not to mention the live feeding. God, what, like —

Keith: I sort of stretch out like there's something in his neck that he can't quite get out.

Ali: [laughing]

Dax: I don't like dealing with this stuff. I just want to focus on my own shit.

Darren: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You got any, you got any plans?

Dax: Oh, I got any? Yeah.

Darren: Huh? Well, spit it to me, brother.

Dax: Okay. Okay. Okay.

Jack: Oh, right, because you know — I told you that he was working on a scheme, right?

Ali: Uh-huh.

Keith: What is the best thing, and the worst thing about small mammals?

Jack: [laughing] Because that's how far we got.

Darren: Okay. Okay. Uh... the best thing, obviously, uh, is that... uh... since they're smaller, they tend to be cuter, uh, on average.

Dax: Yes. Yes.

Darren: Small things are cute, we all know this.

Dax: Right.

Darren: Uh, the worst thing, what's the worst thing? Uh... I guess that they get eaten by reptiles?

Dax: That is, that is slowly inching its way to the number one slot, but it was a trick question. The worst thing is, they're so little, you can't even hardly see 'em!

Darren: Mmm. Mmm. Yeah. Yeah, you get some small guys over there.

Dax: Do you remember the pachyderms.

Ali: [snorts]

Darren: Do I, do I remember — yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I do.

Dax: And you remember the great cats. In, in great cats?

Darren: Mmm, mm-hm.

Dax: They were so big you could have 100 people out there watching them do their thing. Mostly sleeping. But roaring and picking stuff up with trunks. And when we put the backpacks on the pachyderms, on the pecker... the pekingese, the peccary? Peccar — what were those? Pekingese? The pig guys.

Darren: Oh, the, the — peccaries?

Dax: Peccaries.

Darren: Yeah.

Dax: The little backpacks on the peccaries.

Darren: Yeah. Yeah...

Dax: You could have dozens of people watching the peccaries, and they're not that big.

Darren: Yeah... well, well, are you trying to make your small animals bigger? You got some kind of lasers?

Dax: Lenses.

Darren: Lenses...

Dax: Every exhibit, you build a perfect little exhibit, for the littlest mammals on the planet. But we put a big, huge, lens in front of it, so that 50, 60 people can watch, all at the same time!

Darren: Like the movies.

Dax: It's going to be the biggest little animal exhibit in the world.

Ali: [laughing]

Darren: Yo, okay, wait, yo, I gotta think about — like... like how big are we, like how big is a lens? Like, like a, are we talking like a 21-inch [chuckling] 4K —

Dax: No, we're talking like 21 feet, minimum.

Darren: 21 feet?

Dax: Yes, across.

Darren: We're talking football?

Dax: Yes.

Darren: We're talking basketball?

Dax: Wait, why those?

Darren: Isn't that the size of the things?

Dax: No, football is 100 yards.

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: [laughing] [snorts]

Darren: Well, that's big, right?

Dax: It's big, yeah. 100 yards?

Darren: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dax: See? This is why we worked so well together back then. Is that you take what I was thinking, and you just level it up. 100 yards lens!

Darren: I'm experienced, bro. Like... [laughing] I'm your stat boost, man.

Dax: Yeah.

Darren: I missed you, man.

Dax: Missed you, too.

Darren: I got — where, where are we getting the lenses? Who we got to talk to?

Dax: We gotta make 'em custom made.

Darren: Mmm..

Dax: This is a Guinness Book of World Records, biggest lens in the world. Let alone, biggest little animal exhibit in the world. This is two records.

Ali: [wheezes]

Darren: Two records, one exhibit, man.

Dax: Just think, if you — do you remember the mouse lemurs?

Darren: Yeah. Yeah.

Dax: Do you remember the pygmy possums?

Darren: [snorts] Who could forget? The possums, man —

Dax: Imagine —

Darren: When they're eating the bananas, with their little hands.

Dax: You know, half-ounce —

Jack: Dice.

Dax: Half ounce of pygmy possum, blown up on — not just a big screen, the megalens. So it's like, real. It's right there.

Darren: Woah, you're talking 4, you're talking 4D possums?

Dax: 4D possums.

Darren: Man.

Dax: Long-tailed planigale.

Darren: Yeah.

Jack: Wait, did two dice get given? No, I think what happened is that chat saw me move that black die onto my little thing.

Keith: Mmm.

Ali: Mmm.

Jack: And then moved a white die below Ali's name.

Ali: Yeah.

Keith: Yeah.

Ali: So I was just given a positive die. Which means... this is going to be a successful scene for me, which I, you know, I... this is... getting in on Dax's scheme, I think was my goal here. And I think that I am dialed in. [laughing] We can keep —

Dax: Can you just, can you just do something to hype me up real quick?

Darren: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dax: Say this, say — just say this. The biggest little animal exhibit in the world.

Darren: You want me to do like a voice, or —

Dax: No, just say it with, I mean, say it like —

Darren: Like a [announcer voice] biggest world — [laughing]

Dax: [laughs] Say it however it feels when you hear it.

Darren: Biggest little animal exhibit in the world! [trumpet noises]

Dax: Yes. We're doing it.

Darren: Yes, bro.

Dax: We're on the bro page.

Ali: [laughing]

Darren: Well, let me, let me run, let me run something by you.

Dax: Yeah.

Darren: Because I got, I kind of got this, uh, —

Dax: Oh, yeah, what do you got going on?

Darren: Well I just kind of have this, this, this... you know, Dax, Dax feels — I mean, Dud, Dud, Dud feels kind of bad about the —

Dax: Dud?

Darren: You know, ol' Brick House.

Dax: Shit House.

Darren: Come on, man, he, he, he climbed that ladder all right. You know. Maybe he just isn't built —

Dax: That's not important to me.

Darren: No, I know. No, I know. But I'm just, maybe if, instead of, you know, giving him access to chinchillas, maybe he's like a good —

Dax: I didn't give him access to chinchillas. He broke into the exhibit.

Darren: I, I, I know —

Dax: And took animals.

Darren: Okay. And, it's, I'm glad you're a part of zoo staffing now, because you're going to turn this place around. But like, what if, what if Dudley's calling is, is lenses, man? You know? Just give him —

Dax: Can you give me one reason why I should think that Dudley's calling might be lenses?

Jack: [laughing]

Darren: Well, because it would —

Ali: [sputters laughing]

Darren: Because it wasn't reptiles, and if he, if he —

Keith: [laughs]

Dax: No, I, I honestly believe that his calling is reptiles. He's just a piece of shit.

Darren: Well, I just — well, you need a really big lens, right? Which you're going to need a bunch of guys climbing up on ladders to polish it and carve it and everything. I was just —

Keith: [laughing]

Darren: I was just wondering —

Dax: Oh, so you're imagining that we're going to fit ladders into the construction of the lens.

Darren: Well, the, you know, it's going to, it's gonna be big, man, how are you going to get around that lens?

Dax: So, you're, you're saying, Dudley could be in exhibit design.

Darren: Yeah.

Dax: But I already filed, I filed... I'm sorry for what I'm about to say. I filed the paperwork.

Darren: Woah, okay.

Dax: Eugh. Eugh.

Darren: No, I know. Well, you gotta do that. You gotta. I mean, yeah. That's, that's life, man.

Dax: But I... but life used to not be me like that.

Darren: No, no, I know. But, you know. It's a new you every day.

Dax: A new you every day.

Darren: You know?

Dax: Yeah.

Darren: You know, bro?

Dax: Mm-hm.

Darren: Uh, me and you, we're straight. And we're going to do this lenses thing.

Dax: We're straight.

Darren: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dax: By the way, I — I was out of line when I said I don't care about the ladders.

Darren: I, I — well, I — you know what? Thank you.

Dax: It's, I just don't care about him.

Darren: No, I know.

Dax: And he, I mean — he — he took 12 chinchillas in one day. So just like —

Darren: No, I know. No, it — listen —

Dax: Stretch it out over however long.

Darren: The chinchillas — I, I stand with the chinchillas, bro, okay. You did the right thing.

Dax: I'm having shirts made.

Darren: You, you did the right thing.

Dax: Yeah.

Darren: Firing him. I just, what if he... needed, like, a job, you know? You know?

Dax: It's out of my hands at this point, I can't do anything.

Darren: Well, you got — there's going to be lens opportunities. I'm just saying, keep an open mind. I gotta look out for my, my milk — my milk brother.

Dax: If this plays out in a way — if this –

Keith: Sorry.

Ali: [cracking up]

Keith: [laughing]

Dax: Look, milk goes bad.

Jack: Oh!

Darren: [sighs] Yeah.

Jack: Oh my god.

Darren: Listen, I'll see you around, okay? I gotta, I gotta, I gotta wake up the, uh, the muskrats for the, uh...

Dax: Hey, I heard the birds were sad.

Darren: Oh god. I can't even —

Dax: Okay. Okay.

Darren: You — you have a watch?

Dax: Yeah, I have a watch.

Keith: I hold a — I have the Goku Swatch.

Dax: Keeps perfect time.

Darren: I missed you, man. I gotta go, but I missed you, man.

Keith: [laughing]

Dax: Hey, if this plays out and we really need someone to climb a ladder fast... I'll think about it.

Darren: Thanks, brother.

Dax: Did you call me butter?

Jack: That was —

Darren: [laughing] I meant to say brother, but —

Jack: He's got milk on his mind.

Dax: No, I'm not butter. He's butter.

Ali: [laughing]

Darren: I just didn't enunciate.

Jack: Wow...

Dax: Okay.

Jack: That was very touching. That's a fucking —

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: That's a white die scene, if ever there was one. They should teach that in schools for a white die scene.

Keith: [laughing] Yeah, when they're teaching Fiasco class.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: fi-class-co.

Jack: Mmm, mm-hm. Who are you going to give this die to, Ali?

Ali: Oh, who am I going to give this die to? Uh, I think that I'm going to give it to you, Dudley, because I tried to —

Jack: [in Dudley voice] Oh, thanks, bro.

Ali: Fix some of your issues there, I tried to —

Jack: I appreciate it. I appreciate it. [chuckling] I've just noticed that the chinchilla's name is Popcorner. I'm so excited to explore this further.

Keith: [laughing]

Scene 6 [3:28:00]

Jack: I think it's your turn now, Janine. Do you want to establish, or do you want to resolve?

Janine: I want to establish. Uh... where... I want to establish, and I want to scene with Dudley. Where would Devin find Dudley, or can Devin find Dudley right now?

Jack: Yeah. I am in the BMX park that is opposite the zoo.

Janine: [laughs] That's, that's great.

Jack: I am BMXing. Uh, —

Janine: Yeah?

Jack: I'm going up the half-pipe and I'm spinning round in circles when I get to the top. Uh, uh, yeah. How do you, how do you attract my attention?

Janine: I... I... well, [chuckles] I walk into the BMX park and I have Popcorner on my shoulder. And, under my arm, I have, uh, kind of like, a, uh, you know, like a really cheap portfolio case, like someone who's in high school art might have.

Jack: Mmm.

Janine: So it's kind of like, big, but it's, it's also not like a good one. It's like a —

Jack: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Janine: It's like a 15 dollars from Michael's one. Uh... and I think I like, I like wave, I like, flag you. It's got zoo stickers on it. I just feel like it should.

Jack: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh, I do a sick trick and kind of pull up next to you.

Dudley: Hey, Devin!

Devin: I didn't know you, I didn't know you did BMX. You're pretty good.

Dudley: I'm learning. Thank you. Thank you.

Devin: Yeah.

Dudley: Yeah, it's pretty cool. It's pretty cool. To do BMX.

Devin: I heard you got fired.

Dudley: Who's asking?

Devin: … me. Because I heard you got fired.

Dudley: Yeah. Bad scene. Bad scene. Yeah. You, uh... you got that chinchilla, huh? Who's that little fella?

Devin: This is Popcorner.

Dudley: Sick. He like your, your pet or something?

Devin: Yeah, Dax said I could have him.

Dudley: Oh... cool.

Devin: Uh-huh. It's pretty cool. Uh, do you want your job back?

Dudley: Do I? Fuck — how do I get my job back?

Devin: Well, okay. So...

Janine: And Devin like, crouches down the ground and opens up this portfolio —

Dudley: No, no — bro, no, no. Not here. Someone will BMX over it. Like, they'll do it respectfully, but it won't be good for the portfolio.

Devin: All right, fine.

Dudley: Uh, come over here.

Jack: And there's like a flat, uh, like, concrete thing about a big fountain of a dolphin, uh, behind it.

Janine: Mm-hm.

Dudley: Just lay it out there, bro. It's cool, no one's going to BMX over it.

Devin: Okay. [chuckles]

Janine: Uh... so Devin lays everything out. And what she has here is, she has a few sheets of tracing paper. She has what looks to be, uh, an old will. Uh, and by old I mean like it's probably from like... you know, it's... the 90s or something. Uh, so it's like, it's aged, but it's not like, old old. And, uh, she has a few sheets of like, blank paper that have been aged with like, probably tea. It's a little bit obvious, uh, because it smells like tea. Uh, and she says, “You know what this is?” And she lifts up the paper with the [unintelligible]

Dudley: Looks like, some kind of like, legal document.

Devin: Yeah. It's uh, it's an old copy of my grandpa's will.

Dudley: Oh, cool. Cool. Yeah. Sweet.

Devin: He was — okay, you don't know who my grandfather is. That's fine, most people don't. Uh, he was the main benefactor of the zoo.

Dudley: Woah, okay. Yeah, I'm listening.

Devin: And I think... a thing I could do for you, is I could just like, forge a little note, that like, puts in a good word for you, using the handwriting on this will. And then, someone could just, like, find that note, and be like, “Oh, man, I guess DE Hitchcock the IV really, really liked Dudley. Maybe we shouldn't have fired him.” And then the thing that you can do for me, is get me some beer.

Keith: [laughing]

Dudley: Okay. Okay. All right, look, look kid. Couple of questions. One: isn't this man dead? He's like, old, dead, right?

Devin: Yeah, but people — you know, there's like — my mom says this, I kind of don't believe it, but mom says that our family's always had kind of like a clairvoyant thing. And so, some people really just thought that he could like, predict stuff like that. So, you know, my mom would believe this. She would believe this note.

Dudley: So, this guy was around in the past —

Devin: That he could just foresee you — yeah.

Dudley: And he foresees me, right?

Devin: Uh-huh. Yeah. Mm-hm.

Dudley: Okay. Okay. Okay. Mmm. I, I don't feel good about the beer aspect of it. But all this other stuff sounds great. I'm happy to figure out the details, sort of vis-a-vis the beer.

Devin: What details? You just get me some beer.

Dudley: I don't think I should be — no, I don't think that's a good idea.

Devin: You're old enough.

Dudley: Well, I mean, yeah, practically it works out just fine. But like, that stuff's bad, kid.

Devin: It's beer, not gasoline.

Dudley: Why do you want beer?

Devin: To drink it.

Dudley: Shit.

Devin: With my friends? We want to play Fortnite and drink beer.

Dudley: With your — with your —

Devin: With my friends.

Keith: [laughing]

Dudley: Okay. Okay. Right. Right. Okay. Huh. And you think this plan will work?

Devin: Yeah, why wouldn't it? I'm really good at copying notes. I get out of school all the time.

Dudley: Well, we're forging — no, no, I believe that the copying, that's all going to go fine. The truth of your note is going to be great. It's whether or not it's going to be enough to get me my job back, you know?

Devin: Well, one note's better than no notes. Listen, if I make the note, and then it doesn't get you your job back, then you can just, like, get me a 12-pack instead of like a 24. Or a 6-pack. I don't, it doesn't, you know, 6 is fine, too.

Dudley: I don't — this is fucked-up, man. Is there — okay. I can't give you the beer. I'm, I'm drawing a hard line on it. But I can, I might be able to give you 20,000 dollars.

Devin: Okay.

Keith: [cracking up]

Dudley: I got some fingers in some pies, right, that if I manage to like — if it pulls through, okay? 20,000 bucks. For my job.

Devin: I already said okay.

Dudley: Yeah, okay. I'm just making sure that we know, the, the deal that we're talking about. What's the time scale on this, that we're talking about?

Devin: I mean, I can, I can just do this note, like, it's not going to take a long time.

Dudley: Okay.

Devin: Old guy says some guy's good? It's easy, it's like 20 minutes.

Dudley: Okay. Yeah. Okay. Right. And I can get you your money... what day is it? I can get you your money by the end of the week.

Devin: All right.

Dudley: All right. We'll shake on it.

Devin: Yeah, we got a deal, Brick House.

Dudley: We got a deal, Zeller.

Jack: Shakes hands, nervously goes back to doing BMX.

Janine: [chuckling] Nervously BMXing.

Jack: Uh, shit. Uh, no, no dice has been assigned.

Janine: No dice!

Ali: Oh. I feel like I keep forgetting that part of it. Uh... that feels like a...

Keith: Hmm.

Ali: Uh...

Keith: That's a great question.

Janine: We can also continue and turn it into a failure if we want it to be a failure.

Jack: Yeah, we can fully —

Ali: Well, I feel like Devin, Devin achieved her goals there. So I feel like it, it's fair to give you a positive dice there.

Keith: Yeah. I agree.

Ali: I know it's tough that we keep doing it [chuckling] after the fact so you don't like, get the...

Janine: [chuckling]

Ali: The enjoyment of being like, “Oh, I have to, I have to swerve now.” But —

Janine: I mean, we can roll with the punches. Done that before. Uh, I'm going to give this to... Dax. Just to honor the fact that we have introduced DE Hitchcock the IV.

Ali: [giggling]

Scene 7 [3:38:00]

Keith: Oh, thank you. You're right. Okay. Uh... I'm going to... uh... what's, what is, what is the other thing? Not establishing a scene? I'm —

Jack: Yeah, you get to choose how, how the resolution works, if you go —

Keith: Right. Just what's the name of this? The anti-establish a scene?

Jack: Uh, resolve.

Keith: Resolve. I would like to resolve a scene, please. For the last, the last pre-tilt.

Janine: Mmm.

Keith: Oh, wait. Is that not true?

Jack: No, uh, I will go after, because Ali started.

Keith: Right, yes yes yes yes.

Ali: Mmm.

Jack: Hm... okay. Let's see. Oh, I've got it. Uh, anybody else can be here, but, but this is Dax. Dax, you are sitting in an office. You are asked to come, wearing a suit. Have you?

Keith: Sleeveless suit, yeah.

Ali: [cackling]

Jack (as Manager): Well, Mister Leopard — you know, I've never really noticed that. It's, uh, your name's leopard, isn't it? And you work at a zoo, don't you, at The Zoo, don't you?

Dax: Uh, yeah. Yeah. My last name's Leopard. Used to work with the big cats.

Jack (as Manager): Ha-ha. It's a little funny, isn't it?

Dax: Uh, yeah. It's funny, got little, got — you know. It's got star power.

Jack (as Manager): Because your name's the animal name, and you worked at the zoo with the animals.

Dax: Yeah.

Jack (as Manager): Well, I've been going through the books, and I think it's time for you to make your weekly report. I know that in the past you made the report to my predecessor, Emma Sloan, but I'm glad to meet you, Dax, and I'll be taking care of your zoo business from here.

Dax: Uh, why is that?

Jack (as Manager): Well, Miss Sloan decided to move, uh, further on to better pastures.

Dax: Better?

Jack (as Manager): Well, better, yes. Better pastures, yes.

Dax: Better than The Zoo?

Jack (as Manager): Heh. Well, it's a little funny, because she used to work with the zoo, and the animals, uh, uh, pastured in the zoo, rather. Uh...

Dax: That's, I think that's smart.

Jack (as Manager): Yes, absolutely. My name is Councilman Ort. Uh, and I'm very happy to be, to be making your acquaintance. So, how have things been in the zoo this last week?

Dax: Uh, well, it was... uh... you know. It was a good week, mostly. There was a couple setbacks, but I think we're on track to having a really excellent year.

Jack (as Ort): Yes, setbacks. I see that you've written down here, “Birds.” Could you talk me through... the birds issue?

Dax: Uh, well, it's sort of, it's sort of an emotional issue. The birds had, a, someone played a song for the bird that they didn't like, so they didn't put on as much of a show as they liked to. And, uh, we're not 100 percent sure where one of the, uh, birds are. But it's fine, because as a percentage of the birds, it's very low. It's the smallest bird in the world.

Jack (as Ort): Well, that won't do. Oh, so, heh-heh. Heh-heh — by percentage, the amount of birds lost is... is not, not, not, not — it's a rounding error.

Dax: Right.

Jack (as Ort): Oh.

Dax: And I make those all the time.That's a joke.

Jack (as Ort): Oh. Ah, heh-heh. But you see how it doesn't look very good for us if your animals are going missing, does it?

Dax: Yes.

Jack (as Ort): No... Zoo Two? People coming to Zoo Two, they want to see more animals.

Dax: Right.

Jack (as Ort): They want to see — they don't want to see less animals. You're, you're giving me less animals.

Dax: Right.

Jack (as Ort): But, uh, it's okay. I think any further animals that get lost, or go missing, a little concerning. But for the time being, I can just put it down as a warning. Now tell me — you've written chinchillas here.

Dax: Uh, right. So... I don't want to presume, but we are going to have this conversation a couple times.

Jack (as Ort): Ah, heh. Yes, we're meeting weekly.

Dax: No, I mean a couple times today. We did lose 12 chinchillas.

Jack (as Ort): Oh, you lost 12 chinchillas.

Dax: Well, one of the reptile, uh, keepers, uh, who has already been terminated, uh, was confused about where the food was coming from for —

Jack (as Ort): Was confused?

Dax: Yes. Was confused about —

Jack (as Ort): Fed the chinchillas?

Dax: Yes. I'm glad that you got there so I didn't have to.

Jack (as Ort): To some kind of snake? Disgusting.

Dax: Yeah.

Jack (as Ort): We've terminated this person?

Dax: Yeah.

Jack (as Ort): Yes. That seems, that seems just. That seems viable. As a punishment.

Dax: Oh, yeah. I did it faster than you could climb a ladder. Or faster than he could climb a ladder, which would be funny if you knew him.

Jack (as Ort): Heh, heh, heh.

Ali: Oh, dice. When...

Jack (as Ort): Oh, yeah. But that was an appropriate punishment.

Dax: It — yeah, it was, yeah.

Jack (as Ort): A fish has gone missing, hasn't, it, Mister Leopard?

Dax: See, now, this is an interesting one. We believe that this, uh, was a crime.

Jack (as Ort): One of your normal fish?

Dax: Uh... well, it was a donation fish. Part of one of the special exhibits. The fish it, the fish itself was unremarkable.

Jack (as Ort): Mister Leopard, do you have your Zoo ID card on you?

Dax: I do, yeah.

Jack (as Ort): Can I see it for a second?

Dax: Yeah.

Jack: Uh, and he takes a big pair of metal scissors out of the top drawer of his desk and cuts it in half.

Dax: Why did you do that?

Jack (as Ort): You'll need to be seeking further employment.

Ali: [gasps]

Dax: Why?

Jack (as Ort): Well, this simply can't be allowed to stand, Mister Leopard, as the representative — of course, you'll be able to continue to serve in the City Parks Department —

Dax: Right.

Jack (as Ort): But I can't have you working with The Zoo.

Dax: Why?

Jack (as Ort): There was a bird the size of a thumb —

Dax: I'm not Zoo administration. I'm... city administration. I'm just, I'm a zoo keeper. I work in —

Jack (as Ort): The buck stops with you, Mister Leopard. You are the Leopard at my desk. Heh-heh. What kind of punishment do you expect? You lose a bird the size of your thumb. You lose 12 chinchillas. A fish worth 120,000 dollars that it won by playing blackjack, has gone missing. And you expect me to let you walk out of this office with your head held high as an employee of the Bluff City Zoo Two?

Dax: What, what is — your official position?

Ali: [giggling]

Jack (as Ort): I'm the councilman in charge of the Project Zoos.

Dax: But I'm a councilman in charge of the Project Zoos.

Jack (as Ort): No, no. You are part of the City Parks Department. You're going to get very little from... trying to split hairs with me, Leopard.

Dax: What authority gives a councilman hiring and firing over the zoo?

Jack (as Ort): The authority of the City, Mister Leopard. I don't think you understand. You are a citizen of this city, as are many of the people, heh, even the animals in your zoo. But the city itself speaks through me, and through people in my station. When I tell you that you are fired from Bluff City Zoo, that is material fact.

Dax: This is harsh, man.

Jack (as Ort): Well, yes..

Dax: I don't think you've got the right guy. I was going to build a lens.

Jack (as Ort): Well, we'll see about —

Dax: I was going to make the biggest exhibit — biggest little exhibit in the world!

Jack (as Ort): I'm sure it would have been beautiful. Well, are we done here?

Keith: I take both halves of my card. And I guess we're done.

Jack: Okay, that's a black die.

Ali: Ooh. Brutal.

Jack: Zootal.

Ali: What are we doing here?

Keith: [laughs]

Janine: Oh, man. Only one of us still works at the zoo.

Jack: [laughing] Yep.

Ali: [laughs]

Jack: Uh, Keith, who would you like to pass this black die to?

Keith: I'm giving this black die to Jack.

Jack: Fuck you! [laughing]

Ali: Mmm.

Jack: This feels pointed. [chuckling]

Ali: [laughs]

Keith: It was quite pointed, yes, this is a pointed black die.

Jack: Ugh. Okay. Uh... I... would also like to resolve a scene. Wait, Keith, you chose that that scene was going to end badly.

Keith: No, I didn't, I didn't. I forgot that I did that.

Ali: [gasps]

Keith: So actually, I don't get this black die. I —

Jack: Wait.

Keith: Yeah, I didn't take that black die.

Ali: Oh, so wait —

Jack: Where did that black die come from? Someone moved a black die into place.

Keith: And then I just went with it.

Ali: I... I assigned it because I forgot that Keith...

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: Had [laughing] chosen to resolve the scene. [laughing]

Keith: Well, I guess, I guess that we can, uh, leave it as played. Or, we can review the scene.

Ali: Well, what was, what was — what was the result you were going to choose for yourself?

Keith: I don't know, because we got a black die right away.

Ali: It was... mmm.

Keith: It was like halfway.

Ali: Sure. Uh... yeah. I'm, that was, that was my bad. Uh...

Janine: I do think it's funny if, like, someone who used, “I'm on the Parks Department,” to fire someone from the zoo, gets that same shit played against them.

Jack: Yes, that's the —

Janine: Like, that is funny.

Ali: In what way?

Jack: Like — oh, Dax getting fired after firing Dudley.

Ali: Oh, oh, oh.

Janine: And doing the whole speech of like, “What authority do you have over the zoo?” [laughing] It's like, well... you...

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: Yeah, I mean, the, you know, without wanting to make the subtext, text, the thing I was fully going for is that there is always a bigger fish in Bluff City behind you, eating the fish that you thought was the biggest fish.

Janine: Yeah.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Jack: I think, also, it puts the power dynamics in the group in a really interesting place, if Dax's whole beef with Dudley was that, like, it was a fireable offence, and now Dax has also been fired. Uh, it's like a, like a potentially leveling entity, or an inflammatory entity, at the same time.

Keith: Oh, it's inflammatory.

Jack: [laughing]

Ali: [giggling]

Janine: [chuckles]

Scene 8 [3:51:00]

Keith: All right, I'm going to say it's Jack's turn.

Jack: Okay. Now, I am going to resolve, and I'm going to — so now, people get to frame a scene for me, and I decide the final die.

Ali: What should Dudley be up to? I mean, you got a fish to care for, buddy.

Janine: That's true.

Ali: What, what's like, yeah. I guess that's what I'm curious about, in terms of Dudley's... because, you stole a fish, you had some big plans to like, get money from that, question mark, and then you woke up the next morning with like, “I gotta BMX,” [wheezes] , “I gotta get my mind right.”

Keith: [laughing]

Janine: Killing time until the fish is ready to go, right? Or until the water's good?

Ali: Right, yeah.

Jack: Yeah, I think so. I don't know about getting my mind right.

Janine: So is the water good now?

Jack: Yeah.

Ali: Yeah. This could be... maybe Jerry said 24 hours will do, gave you a water serum or whatever. I don't know — a conditioner is what you would call that.

Janine: Hyaluronic acid, keep the fish soft.

Ali: [laughing] Picked up some Drunk Elephant for the ol' fish.

Janine: [chuckling]

Ali: Uh, uh, but yeah. I'm, I'm, I'm curious to see what, what, what you think step 2 is, in this plan. Uh...

Jack: Okay. Uh... Darren, your phone rings.

Darren: What's popping?

Dudley: Little dude's doing great.

Darren: Oh, so glad to hear that, man.

Dudley: He's been bopping about —

Darren: Yeah? Did you get, did you — did you get him one of those rings like I asked you to?

Dudley: Yeah, yeah, totally. He loves that shit.

Darren: He's swimming through it?

Dudley: He's fucking swimming through it.

Darren: Oh, hell yeah, man.

Dudley: He looks great.

Darren: And the temperature's good? What's the temperature?

Dudley: Temperature's good. Temperature's at the right temperature for a betta.

Darren: So like 78? Okay, cool, man.

Dudley: 78. Exactly, spot on.

Darren: Cool, man.

Dudley: 78 degrees.

Darren: Yeah, this is... this is the best day. This is the opposite of yesterday, man.

Dudley: Yeah. So... I actually, I wanted to call for some advice, actually, bro. Fish-based advice.

Darren: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah? You know, you got me.

Dudley: So, I know that the plan was that, like, I return the fish, you know? Like... I, uh... I trade my job, I basically be like, “Hey, look, I founded fish, I recovered your fish, give me my job back,” right? Remember that?

Darren: Mmm, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dudley: But I got another plan going. And my job's — a dead sir.

Darren: Oh...

Dudley: My job's good. I could just get my job back, without the fish, right?

Darren: Yeah, this is what I was trying to tell you, bro.

Dudley: No, but I didn't know that that second, like, opportunity was going to transpire, right?

Darren: Well — you're just going to bring the fish back, right? Because it kind of had, like, a nice lake setup in the, the rich fish, uh, setup. And I think that it really liked that song, you know, it likes to be celebrated.

Dudley: I was thinking maybe something else, actually.

Darren: Yeah? What were you thinking? You know, you can deal me in, you know. I'm, I'm —

Dudley: Yeah.

Darren: I'm a backup guy, I'm here to support my milk brother.

Dudley: Milk brothers, man. I was thinking maybe, uh... maybe we sell it.

Darren: Oh, come on —

Ali: [laughing]

Darren: Oh, Brick House. Come on, man, we can't — come on.

Dudley: Well, maybe we actually —

Darren: The fish isn't a commodity, man.

Dudley: Maybe we actually have to, because, like, I'm now 20K in the hole to this person who's going to get my job back.

Darren: Wait, what?

Dudley: Yeah. They wanted 20K.

Darren: That... what? How... how much —

Jack: Someone just assigned me a black die. You can't do that!

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: I'm resolving this scene. [chuckles]

Janine: Uh, Dudley, you're going to get a text message of a picture of a forged letter. And I'm just going to send you the text in Slack, and you can do with it what you will, at the moment. It's a secret for now.

Jack: Wow, it's real. This person's great. Yeah.

Dudley: So, they needed 20K, and I said — yeah.

Darren: 20 — 20K, that's like... that's like, that's like, that's like... that's more than I make like a month.

Dudley: I know.

Darren: That's more than I make, like, a year, buddy.

Dudley: Yeah, I know. I know. It's real money.

Darren: Where are you — what — you can just... I, we got this lens thing going. I don't know that you need to... just, we can just get a way — you don't have to give this person money. We just give the fish back, and the fish will be happy, and then you'll be climbing ladders really fast, and you'll be happy. And you'll just —

Dudley: It's too late, man. It's too late for me, bro.

Darren: Come on, man.

Dudley: I already posted it. I already posted the listing, bro.

Darren: You — you listed it, man.

Dudley: It's too late, bro. Bro.

Darren: Yeah, the —

Dudley: Bro, I got a call coming in on another line, bro. I gotta go.

Darren: Were you, were you thinking of the fish, man?

Dudley: Yeah, I was thinking of the fish, man. You know, bro, I gotta go.

Jack: Uh, Keith?

Keith: Yeah.

Ali: [sputtering]

Jack: I need a fish buyer.

Ali: [cackling]

Dudley: Yeah, hey man.

Ali: Can you have accidentally put it on a three-way call?

Jack: Oh, yes! [laughing] Absolutely.

Ali: [cackling] [snorts]

Keith (as buyer): [through extremely deep bass voice disguiser] Do you have the fish?

Ali: [losing it, gasping] Shut the fuck up.

Janine: Oh my god.

Ali: [laughing] No, Keith. [giggling]

Janine: Oh, the Counts are here.

Keith (as buyer): Yes or no, do you have the fish?

Darren: You're selling to Batman, man? You're selling this fish to frigging Batman?

Dudley: Shh. Shut up!

Keith (as buyer): Who is that?

Dudley: Shut — shut up! No. Fuck.

Keith (as buyer): This is a one on one call.

Dudley: Fuck. Bro.

Keith (as buyer): You said you were working alone.

Dudley: No, no, no. No. Look, man, give me a chance. Give me a chance, give me a chance, give me a chance, give me a chance, give me a chance, give me a chance. Bro. Bro.

Keith (as buyer): This shit stinks. This shit stinks worse than a dead fish.

Dudley: No. No, no.

Jack: Uh, I have selected a white die.

Ali: [giggling]

Dudley: No, no. Okay, look, give me a chance, bro. Give me a chance, bro.

Keith (as buyer): Fine, fine. One chance. Do you have the fish?

Dudley: Okay, man. Yeah, I have the fish, man. Do you have what I'm asking for?

Keith (as buyer): Describe the fish. Describe what it is looks like.

Ali: [chuckling]

Dudley: He's like a little fucker, man. He's going in and out of the circle, the ring thing. He fucking loves it, man.

Keith (as buyer): Be specific. What does the fish look like?

Ali: [laughing]

Dudley: He's like a little fucker. He's like, I don't know, man, he's —

Darren: He's, he's a majestic male betta —

Dudley: Shut up! Shut up, bro!

Darren: Approximately 7 years old, uh, with a, uh, uh, uh, a, uh, — [laughing]

Dudley: Jesus, bro. Fucking one chance.

Darren: A golden gradient to, to red, to a majestic blue. The colors run strong. Uh, it's been fed three times a day. What fish information do you want to know, bro?

Keith (as buyer): Okay.

Dudley: Sick, yes!

Keith (as buyer): I have one last question.

Ali: [laughing]

Dudley: Yeah. What — what is it?

Keith (as buyer): And don't fucking toy with me here, okay?

Ali: [laughing]

Dudley: No, no. No, man. No toying.

Keith (as buyer): Do you have the routing number? And the account.

Dudley: The what?

Keith (as buyer): The fish's routing number! The fish's bank info!

Dudley: What? This wasn't part of the deal.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith (as buyer): I know what fish this is, motherfucker. I'm not a fucking idiot. Don't play me.

Dudley: Shit. Okay, okay. I'm not playing, I'm not trying to play you. I'm not trying to play you, man. I'm not trying to play you. I'm not trying to play you, man. Why do you need the fucking account — sorry, I don't mean to be disrespectful, man. Why do you need the account number and the routing number?

Keith (as buyer): I know what the fish is worth. It's worth that bank info. That's what it's worth.

Dudley: … but I was trying to sell you the fish, man?

Keith (as buyer): This fish isn't worth anything, this is a betta fish. This is a betta fish that won a poker contest. I know what the fish is. I'm buying. If you're selling, with the account info. Yes or no.

Darren: Man, you know the bank tattooed that on the fish after the contest.

Dudley: Bro, okay, listen.

Keith (as buyer): Is that true?

Dudley: Yeah, it's true.

Ali: [chuckling]

Dudley: It's true. It's true. Just give me —

Keith (as buyer): Is that fucking true?

Ali: [chuckles]

Dudley: Yeah, bro, it's true, it's true.

Keith (as buyer): I'm not your bro, bro.

Dudley: Okay. Sorry, man. It's true, man. Okay, listen.

Ali: [snorts]

Dudley: I need to get, I can get you that information by tomorrow. I can get you that information tomorrow, and then the deal is done, okay? I get you the fish, you get me the 120,000. But you've got to give me a day, man. Because that little fuck is going in and out of the circle. I can't read the tattoo on him. Please.

Keith (as buyer): Friday.

Dudley: Friday. Friday.

Keith (as buyer): Friday afternoon. You — [voice modulation suddenly drops] bring the fish, and you I'll bring the money —

Dudley: Woah!

Keith (as buyer): [deep voice resumes] Oh, fuck!

Ali: [cracking up]

Keith (as buyer): You bring the fish and I'll bring the money, I said!

Ali: [laughing]

Keith (as buyer): And you didn't hear shit! [voice drops out again] You didn't hear [voice resumes] shit!

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: I've never heard Ali laugh like that.

Jack: Call, click! Call hangs up.

Ali: [chokes and sputters from laughing]

Dudley: Okay. Bro.

Darren: This is the type of people you're dealing with, man? You're talking to Joker. You're talking to the Penguin, man.

Dudley: Why did you say that — why did you say that thing about the tattoo, bro?

Darren: You're talking to the, the, the, the, the Riddler, man. Come on!

Dudley: Why'd you say that shit about the tattoo, bro? We know that there's not, there's, there's shit tattooed on that fish. Why'd you tell him that?

Darren: You weren't saying nothing, buddy. Because you weren't saying anything, man.

Dudley: Well, I didn't know shit. I was fucking terrified of him, bro! Bro?! Two days ago, I was feeding chinchillas to my snake, man! And now I'm talking to the fucking Penguin.

Darren: You gotta stay away from animals, buddy.

Dudley: I want to work at the zoo!

Darren: I don't want to see you at Jerry's, okay?

Dudley: Man, ugh... look, man. I got the deal set up. This deal is set up. All we got to do — that man's good for this, do you know how fucking seriously this —

Darren: What did you tell you, man? Fish aren't commodities.

Dudley: I'm not trying to commodify this fish!

Ali: [chuckles]

Darren: I don't know that I can talk to you, man. I don't know that I can do this right now. I'm feeling a little lactose intolerant.

Ali: Click.

Jack: Fuck. I mean, I assigned myself a white die for this —

Keith: [laughing]

Jack: But I think, being honest to the fiction, we played out a black die.

Ali: [wheezes] That's true. [laughing]

Jack: There. I was being like, the, the, uh, the trade is set up, and now we just need to get the bank info, but then we can trade the fish. But I fucking — my best mate. J Hawkins in the chat says, “The milk is separating.”

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: You can make butter with milk after all. Who knew?

Ali: I got to, I got to, I got to stay true to Darren here.

Jack: Yeah, I believe you.

Ali: At the end of the day he cares about the animal.

Jack: I'm going to assign myself — I'm going to give myself a black die, and I am going to —

Ali: Well, it can, it can be positive for you in that, like, this deal is going to happen.

Janine: Yeah, he didn't stop you.

Jack: If I can get the fucking tax information, that's true. The tax information — the bank — [laughing]

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: Tax season just finished. My brain is like, getting tax information. Uh...

Janine: Fish has to pay taxes, you have to pay capital gains taxes.

Ali: [chuckling]

Jack: Okay. All right. Okay. I'm going to give this white die to... uh, I'm going to give this white die to Devin, because, as it stands, the — Devin is still in line for 20,000 dollars.

Ali: [laughing] Uh-huh.

Janine: Yeah, Devin's the winner right now. [chuckles]

Jack: And right now —

Keith: I love the reveal that you didn't have 20,000 dollars set up already.

Jack: No, I was so confident about this child's ability to get me my job back that I immediately pivoted to, “Sell the fish.” Uh... but now we have 8 die remaining in the center of the table.

The Tilt [4:04:15]

Jack: And this means that act, this means that act 1 has come to a conclusion. Building across act 1, says Jason on page 37: by the end of act 1, people should be aggressively pursuing their goals and maybe even achieving them. People with needs ought to be chasing them hard or starting to satisfy them. Encourage both poignant and revelatory color scenes, and down and dirty, hilarious conflicts. Keep an eye on those dice! It's easy to forget act 1 at the halfway point.

If your group has a problem with this, randomly parcel out the dice into two piles of equal number, and only touch one pile. At the end of act 1, roll the dice in front of you. Do some dice math. As act 1 wraps up, you'll have some dice in front of you as the result of the proceeding scenes. These are the die on our little, our little squares. Roll them all, and add all the black dice together and all the white dice together. Then, subtract the higher from the lower. For example, if you have one black die and one white die, and roll 6 and 4 respectively, that's 2 black. It's 2 black was the highest number originally. Does this make sense? Or shall we just start and, and —

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: Okay. So I'm going to roll my 3 die. Multi-sided, random side. Ooh, interesting. And I have rolled —

Janine: I got spider eyes.

Jack: Woah! You did get spider eyes. [chuckling] I have rolled spider eyes and a 5. Two, so my total is... uh, I roll them all, I add all the black die together and all the white die together, then subtract the higher from the lower. So I have 8 black, and 5 white. So my total is 3 black.

Ali: Mmm. Am I just a zero, or am I a negative 6?

Jack: Uh, if you end act 1 with only white dice or only black dice, that's a good thing. You're likely to have a high total one way or another. Let me see what happens if you have...

Janine: I mean, 6 minus 0 is just 6.

Keith: Yeah. Yeah, so you have a 6.

Janine: So...

Jack: Yeah.

Ali: Oh, but it would be, but it would be 0 minus 6, though, right?

Keith: No, it's the highest — whatever is your highest.

Janine: No.

Ali: Oh, oh, whatever's highest, okay. I missed that part. I thought it was black minus white.

Jack: Uh, okay. Janine?

Janine: Oh, I have 8.

Jack: Uh, what color's that 8?

Janine: White. 8 white.

Jack: Oh, that's, that's white 8. Yeah. I'm just going to quickly write here that I have a black... uh, 8 minus 5 is 3. Uh, Keith.

Keith: I have a white 1.

Jack: Okay. So. Wait, I accidentally started act 2. If you have the highest number of either color, you will help add a pair of complications. The player with the highest white total, and the player with the highest black total, each gets to choose tilt elements. The tilt is a standard list of details, just like needs, objects, and locations, but this time it represents disruptive, game-changing events, people, and impulses. So, I think that's Janine and me, right? Because Janine has white 8 —

Janine: Mm-hm.

Jack: And I have black 3. Okay. Roll the unused dice in the central pile. You'll want some random numbers. In a 4-person game, you'll have 8 dice. Don't mix these with the dice you've earned in act 1. Briefly try to make a text box there... yeah, nice. Let's consolidate them.

Janine: All right. Let's give them a roll.

Jack: Yeah.

Keith: Oh.

Jack: Okay... this is... mmm.

Janine: Weird. [chuckles]

Jack: Maybe one, maybe one more?

Janine: Maybe one more, this might have been a dud.

Jack: Oop, I just rolled that one.

Janine: Mmm.

Jack: Yeah, I think that's doable.

Janine: Yeah.

Jack: And now we consult the tilt table. This, interestingly, is playbook agnostic. This is in the Fiasco, uh, book. Uh, however, you will recognize its structure from the, uh, uh, from the playsets themselves. It is organized into subcategories, and those are mayhem — so these are numbered, like, like they were first time. Mayhem, tragedy, innocence, guilt, paranoia, and failure. And within those are 6 dice, uh, numbered 1 to 6, that contain things, for example, like, The wrong guy gets busted, or, what seems like dumb luck, isn't, things are afoot, or, a stranger arise to settle score. So what Janine and I are going to do is pick a category and a detail each, such that we add two, uh, uh, things to the game. Do you want to start, Janine?

Janine: Yeah, uh... so we, we just pick what we have numbers for?

Jack: In the center, yeah.

Janine: Category and — okay. Mmm, let's see... we've got 1, 2, 3, 4, 6 as options here. Uh... 1, 2,... 3... 4... I should just read these. So, 1 is mayhem. An out of control rampage, a frantic chase, a dangerous animal, perhaps metaphorical, gets loose. Magnificent self-destruction. Cold-blooded score settling. Misdirected passion. 2, tragedy. Death out of the blue. Somebody's life is changed forever in a bad way. Pain, followed by confusion, death right on time, confusion followed by pain, death after an unpleasant struggle.

3 is innocence. Somebody is not so innocent after all. A neighbor wanders into the situation, the wrong guy gets busted, collateral damage, love rears its ugly head, a well-meaning stranger intervenes. 4 is guilt. A visit from the perhaps unofficial authorities, betrayed by friends. Somebody develops a conscience. Greed leads to killing. Someone panics. A showdown. And I can skip 5 because we don't have any 5s.

But, 6, failure. A stupid plan executed to perfection. Something precious is on fire. A tiny mistake leads to ruin. A good plan comes unraveled. You thought it was taken care of, but it wasn't. And, fear leads to a fateful decision. Uh, I think I'm going to take this 4, to get guilt.

Jack: Ooh, interesting.

Janine: As a category.

Ali: Ooh.

Jack: Okay. Uh, and I am going to take... mmm. What sounded like an owl in the distance.

Ali: [chuckles] I think it was someone going, “Whoo!”

Janine: That's one of the weirdest birds —

Ali: That, that drove by.

Jack: [chuckles] Mm-hm. Yeah, I'm going to take a 3, for innocence. So we've got innocence and guilt, which I think is fascinating.

Janine: [chuckles] All right, am I next?

Jack: Yeah.

Janine: All right, I'm going to take this 6, for a showdown.

Jack: Oh, great.

Janine: Guilt: a showdown.

Jack: Okay. Uh, and I am going to take... mmm, hm hm hm. So, my options here, are — somebody is not so innocent after all, a neighbor wanders into the situation — [chuckles]

Janine: [laughs] We already know what the neighbor of the Zoo is.

Jack: [laughing] Oh my god. What is the neighbor of the Zoo?

Janine: The BMX park.

Jack: [laughs] Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah. There's so many things that could be a neighbor. So, I'm absolutely going to take that. I'm going to take 2, for a neighbor, uh, a neighbor wanders into the situation. So what I'm going to do is I'm going to write down at the bottom here these two tilt elements, just so that we have them for next time. The first is, uh, what's the first one, Janine? It was —

Janine: A showdown.

Jack: A showdown.

Janine: Guilt: a showdown.

Jack: And the second one was, uh, uh, uh, a neighbor arrives. Innocence: a neighbor arrives. I fucking hate this typing.

Janine: It's really bad.

Keith: You can type normally, as long as you put in like, one letter, and then you can edit it by double-clicking —

Jack: Yeah. It's still deeply irritating.

Keith: It is still like that.

Janine: Yeah.

Keith: It's, it's definitely happened before. I can't remember why, or why it was fixed.

Jack: Let me make this say guilt. Ugh. Okay. But we are going to leave it here tonight. Oh, wait, let me just check to see if there's anything else that I need to make sure I read in the tilt section. Because what we're about to do is move on to act 2, although we're not going to do that tonight. Uh... reassemble the central die pile. Okay. So there should be 8 die in the center. Oh, I moved a fish worth 120,000 dollars. Okay. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8. Nice. Keep dice already assigned in act one. Uh, and then, they say, take a break, stretch and get a snack, talk about where the game is going. And that's what, what we're going to do. We are going to take a break here, come back another day. Uh, is there anything we want to make sure we say before we leave off?

Janine: I could read that letter.

Keith: Uh...

Jack: Shit, the letter arrives on the desk. Yeah, that's a really good idea. What were you going to say, Keith?

Keith: I, I want to get an onscreen. I just want everyone to be clear, that when I was using the voice changer, And it shut off, that was in character. That was not a real mistake.

Janine: No, we — yeah.

Keith: Okay. I just want to make sure that we all know this. Because then, well — I hung up, and, uh, uh, Dudley and Darren were both talking about that I was the Joker. So I want to, I just wanted to say it out loud so that we all know.

Janine: It was very good.

Jack: But you did sound like the Joker. When the Joker's making a scary voice.

Keith: Yes. If the Joker sounded different than the Joker sounds, I did [chuckling] sound like the Joker.

Jack: [chuckling] If the Joker sounded weird.

Keith: Right, yeah.

Jack: Uh...

Keith: I was the weirdo Joker.

Jack: Oh my god, not him. We've — we've previously been dealing with the normal Joker.

Keith: [Joker voice] I'm like him, but weird!

Jack: Uh... [chuckles]

Keith: [chuckles]

Jack: Yeah. Uh, how is the letter discovered, Janine?

Janine: Uh, I think it is the kind of thing that Devin maybe like, leaves poking out of like a cupboard or something at home, or like an old filing cabinet, or like... they probably have like, her grandfather's antique desk or something. Uh... so she, like, slips it between some wood panels, so the corner of it's like sticking out for her mom to find. Uh... and, this is what the note says. “Let it be known that I, DE Hitchcock the IV, have had a dream that I believe to be of great import. In this dream, I stood alone in a field. A clear sky became a dark sky, menacing and bearing heavy, roiling clouds. Thunder deafened me. Lightning blinded me. Yet when my sight recovered, I saw safe harbor before me. A brick house, its door open, an inviting berth to harbor those otherwise at the mercy of merciless torrents — a brick house. June 31st, 1994.”

Jack: Man.

Keith: Shit house, more like.

Jack: [laughing] He's so fucking mad. Uh... yeah. Night, like, one image of each of our characters as, as, as we leave, uh... on, uh, on the side of the BMX park, Darren Cruiser is, has got a little laptop open, and is Googling, like, “Find bank account details?”

Keith: Darren, or Dudley?

Jack: Oh, sorry, sorry. Dud — [laughing] sorry, Dudley. I had Darren on my screen. I don't know what Darren's doing. I can't speak for Darren. Dudley is in the BMX park.

Janine: What's Darren —

Jack: Ali might have stepped away for a second. In the meantime, uh, what's, uh, what is Devin doing?

Ali: Oh, I was muted. I didn't realize I was —

Janine: Oh, there you go.

Ali: [laughing] I didn't realize I was muted that whole time.

Keith: Yeah, for a while. I don't think you've said anything for a little bit.

Ali: Hi. Sorry about that. I, I, things you might have missed out on is me saying that during Keith's, uh, switch of voice, that I was laughing so hard that I was actually in pain.

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: Uh, it like literally hurt me.

Keith: Sorry.

Ali: Uh, [laughing] it's okay. Uh... uh, I think Darren has had a really bad day. I think, as a spoiler for our next time, I think Darren might want to steal the fish back. For justice.

Jack: Wow.

Ali: Yeah. But we'll see. We'll see. Anyway, what is, what is Dax up to?

Keith: Uh, Dax is, uh... alone in his yard, thinking, and using one of those balance boards. Like the, like the surfer balance boards.

Jack: Yes.

Keith: It's a ball, or like a cylinder in the middle, and you have like a plank of wood, and you're kind of going back and forth. I'm doing that and balancing, uh, stuff on my nose to try to center myself.

Ali: Mmm.

Jack: Bro. And, uh... Devin.

Janine: Devin is in, uh, AP French.

Jack: [laughing]

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: [giggles] [snorts]

Jack: [still laughing] Oh my god, incredible.

Keith: This is obviously Twitch delay, but I'm going to read it as, as not. Asmalldragon says — like a seal. AP French like a seal.

Ali: [laughing]

Jack: Oh, in AP French, like a seal. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Keith: Like a seal.

Jack: Like a seal would do AP French.

Ali: Mm-hm. Yeah.

Janine: Yeah. You know seal in French is fuck? That's true. That's a fact, yeah.

Keith: Is that true?

Jack: What, PHOQUE?

Janine: Yeah, they can't bleep you for saying it.

Keith: Because it means seal?

Janine: Let me tell you, the day that we discovered this in grade 2, it was... really, it was amazing.

Keith: Wow.

Janine: It was a very powerful day for us. [chuckling]

Keith: That is, that is not what I was doing in French class when I was in second grade.

Janine: We were in French immersion, so they wouldn't let us speak in English, so we had to —

Keith: I was also in French immersion.

Janine: Oh.

Keith: I was in French immersion, K through 3.

Janine: All right.

Ali: Wow.

Janine: Well you should have been cooler and learned swear words.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: In second grade —

Janine: Well, not swear words, animal names.

Keith: In French immersion — [chuckles] in French immersion, we learned the word, uh, airplane, and, uh, which is avion, and then I, uh, got out of my chair, I put my arms out, like an airplane, and flew around the classroom, and then out into and down the hall saying, “avion.” Like, doing a voice and doing airplane noises.

Ali: [snorts]

Janine: [laughs]

Jack: Keith... it fills me with so much joy to know that you have been and remain this person.

Keith: [laughing]

Ali: [chuckling]

Janine: Kinetic learner!

Keith: [still laughing]

Jack: It's like I can, it's like, I look, I look back in time at that version of you, and you're making eye contact with me, and you now, and giving two thumbs up and smiling.

Ali: [laughing]

Keith: Sometimes I have almost the same feeling. I go, for all of the ways that I've changed as a person from when I was 7 to, now that I'm 30, I also am the same in a lot of ways.

Jack: Yes.

Keith: Which is sometimes comforting, and sometimes discomforting.

Jack: Yes.

Ali: Mm-hm.

Jack: That's life, innit?

Janine: Very relatable.

Keith: Yeah.

Closing [4:23:25]

Jack: Okay. What's the plan?

Ali: Uh... well... I... we're going to pause it for today.

Janine: Mm-hm.

Ali: And we're going to say out loud, that in our heart of hearts, we would like to return to this soon. But, if we don't return to this until June, that's just going to be what it is. But maybe.

Keith: Oh, I, I'm going to try very hard to get us to do this in the next —

Jack: This game is so much fun.

Janine: Scheduling gets a little weird, but...

Ali: Yeah. But yeah.

Janine: We're going to try. Scheduling is weird, and also, we have other podcasts to record, also? [laughing]

Ali: Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

Janine: Uh, during some of our free time, so —

Ali: Yeah, so, it, yeah. With —

Keith: The second half goes so much faster, though. Which is important to remember, because the first half —

Janine: Yes.

Keith: We did 2 hours or more of prep. I think we were doing —

Ali: Absolutely, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Keith: Prepped for 2 hours —

Ali: But we, we also went like an hour over what we [chuckling] hoped to do tonight, which is like —

Keith: Yeah.

Ali: You know, preparing this much time for a thing. The, the thing is, is the thing that we said with our Patreon thing, which is like... we would like, we would like to do these once a month, but if it's every other month, that's just what it is. Uh, but I have a good feeling about May. I will say it has been going really well, and I want to return to this very badly.

Jack: Yeah.

Ali: So, keep an eye on the Twitter, keep an eye out on the Twitch. Uh, not the — well, keep an eye on the Twitch, the Patreon is also when that stuff gets updated, so if you turn on, like, email notifications for Patreon, we've been way more active in terms of posting when we're doing live shit, and that's where the sort of smoke will go out, in terms of Bluff Zoo returning. Maybe we'll, maybe we'll also —

Keith: Hey, this is the first public one.

Jack: Yeah!

Ali: Yeah.

Janine: Yeah.

Keith: This is the first, this is the first post-Patreon reorganization Live at the Table.

Ali: Mm-hm. Mm-hm.

Janine: I, uh... I just realized I forgot to put the backer [crawl] in.

Ali: [laughing]

Janine: But it's on the, it's on the Bluff streams.

Ali: Sure. Uh-huh.

Janine: It's, it'll be on the next one of these.

Ali: Yep. Yep.

Janine: Uh... maybe we can put it in the archives? I don't know, I don't want to speak for Keith.

Keith: Maybe we'll finish — yeah, I can do it. Uh...

Ali: [giggling]

Keith: Maybe we can finish this one early, and we can get the Backer crawl in just the second half?

Janine: Yeah, that's what I mean.

Ali: Right, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Janine: It'll be in the next one that we do.

Keith: Okay.

Ali: Right. But this has been a blast.

Keith: Yeah.

Jack: So much fun.

Ali: And thank you everybody for joining us, and thank you for supporting us at friendsatthetable.cash. And thanks for...

Keith: Where, of course, the first part of this is still excellent and you can go back and listen to it. It's November 25th, 2018, that's when this was recorded. So...

Ali: Mm-hm.

Janine: I think it's, it is backer only, though. I don't think it's public.

Keith: No, that's true. So you can go to friendsatthetable.cash, sign up. If you like this, and you're not subscribed.

Ali: Mm-hm. [chuckling]

Keith: And then you can go listen to the first part.

Ali: Mm-hm. Uh... but yeah, more Palisade this week on Thursday. Fantastic episode. I'm, I'm sure people are thinking of this arc as going well, because it is. Uh... [wheezes] and, uh, more stuff on the Patreon this week. Another clapcast on Friday.

Janine: Hell yeah.

Ali: The first Gathering Information is going to be this week. There's going to be a new Bluff City this week, which is crazy. Uh... yeah. There's going to be more Bluff this... more Bluff for you. So...

Janine: So much Bluff.

Ali: Yeah. Keep your ears open. And have a good evening. [chuckles]

Janine: [chuckles]

Jack: Good night, everybody.

Janine: Have a good night, everyone.

Keith: Bye.

Jack: Bye!

Ali: Bye!