Guest Columnist - Green Bay Press-Gazette (March 2012)
Why? It’s a question that so many toddlers ask, but it’s also a question many parents and teens are asking. Recently more teens have been killed in a car crashes in northeastern Wisconsin. I’ve heard different statistics of how many teens have already died in 2012, but no matter what the number, I still wonder “why?” Could any of these teen fatalities been prevented?
As a parent of three teenagers, my husband and I always wonder if our children will make the right choices as they are out with their friends. We can only hope and pray that they will. As a high school teacher, I see how teens try to deal with the death of a peer, a friend, a cousin, a neighbor. Again, I ask, “Why does this happen? Do teens think it won’t happen to them? Do they think they are invincible?”
Recently I viewed a powerful movie that has made a difference in my life. The 5th Quarter is a movie based on a true story of a family in Georgia who loses their 15-year-old son to a tragic car accident. The teen driver wanted to show the other teen passengers “something really cool!” As he accelerated to a very high speed, the car became air-borne and crashed. Luke, one of the teen passengers, is left brain-dead, leaving the family with difficult decisions to make. This happens in the first 10-15 minutes of the movie! The rest of the movie shows how the family deals with the challenges of going on. Research the movie. Search for information on the Internet. Preview clips on YouTube. I encourage parents and teens to watch this movie to see what one family has gone through.
As I watched The 5th Quarter with my children, I could only ask “why” again. In this case, it was all because of someone wanting to do “something really cool.” It wasn’t “cool” seeing this teen on life-support. It wasn’t “cool” seeing the father break down and cry at his son’s funeral. But the results of this “cool” ride are permanent. That’s what teens need to realize. Their choices, sometimes driven by peer pressure, have permanent consequences.
Could any of our local tragedies been prevented? Maybe yes; maybe no. What I do know is that we need to talk to our teens about these difficult life lessons. We adults need to be examples for teens to follow. Do we make smart choices? Do we emphasize the wrong ideas of fun? Does every get-together have to focus around alcohol?
I don’t have the answers, but I do know that too many young people have lost their lives. I can only imagine the pain that their families have gone through or are still going through. You many have heard the phrase, “It takes an entire village to raise a child.” As a parent and a teacher, I think this is true. If you are a parent, grandparent, or a neighbor, talk with the youth of our future. Awareness is a start. Maybe all of our conversations can help prevent us from asking “why” one more time.