Newcomers say it's 'nice,' but not warm
Laura Yuen · MINNEAPOLIS · Mar 12, 2012
When Cathy Schaefer moved to Minneapolis more than two years ago, she didn't feel welcomed. "People would say, 'Oh, we should get together some time,'" said Schaefer, a native New Yorker. "And I'd be like, 'Yes! That would be great because I have no friends!'"
Then she would never hear from them.
Shaefer's experience is a common one. Minnesotans may take pride in their reputation for friendliness, but many others consider "Minnesota Nice" a backhanded compliment and a social critique. The locals are loyal and neighborly, yet they tend to keep outsiders at a comfortable distance.
Many young transplants — whether from South Dakota or South America — say making friends and finding a sense of community is daunting.
MAKING FRIENDS IS A CHALLENGE FOR TRANSPLANTS
Making friends in any market after college or the first time away from home can be challenging, and provinciality is hardly unique to Minnesota. Even in hipster-friendly Seattle, transplants gripe about a similar social malaise known as the Seattle Chill.
The difference, of course, is that Minnesotans hold themselves to a higher standard in just about everything, including their sense of neighborliness.
Chamber of Business president Todd Klingel said, "Those of us, if we think about that, 'In the last year, who have I invited into my house that I didn't know five years ago?' I think we go, 'Ooh, that's a small number,'" he said. " 'Who cares?' Well, the people who aren't getting invited care."
HARDER FOR PEOPLE OF COLOR
Retaining professionals of color in the Twin Cities has been especially tricky. Many professionals of color who have relocated to the Twin Cities speak of an environment in which the locals accept them, but lack a genuine understanding of other cultures.
Ana Gomez, an immigration attorney who moved to Minnesota 12 years ago, said it's not malice but unfamiliarity that causes strangers to make the wrong assumptions about her. A U.S. citizen born in Louisiana, Gomez grew up in Venezuela and speaks English with an accent.
In and around her adopted home of Anoka, she has been mistaken for someone on welfare, or the nanny to her fair-skinned children. "In this environment, they believe everyone from somewhere else is coming to take advantage," said Gomez. "The assumptions hurt."
Many of her good friends — all transplants — have left the state because of the chilly climate for newcomers, she said.
MINNESOTANS ARE GENEROUS, BUT DETACHED
Gomez has tried to come to terms with a place that on one hand is so generous, yet so detached on the other. When she worked for a nonprofit that provided legal services for the poor, she witnessed Minnesota's collective good will toward the less fortunate.
"I know someone will write the check and support them," she said. "I know we're good at accepting refugees. But I don't know how good we are at making those refugees really feel Minnesotan."
Compared to the rest of the country, Minnesota is a largely homogenous state. Its most diverse county, Ramsey County, is still whiter than the national average.
There also is strong evidence that the state is generous and accepting to newcomers and people of different cultures and faiths. Consider the Vietnamese, Mexicans, Ethiopians, Liberians, Russians, Indians, Tibetans and others have come to Minnesota from every corner of the world. It's the first state to send a Muslim to Congress, a Hmong person to the state Legislature, and elect a Somali to public office. Minnesota also is a leader in refugee resettlement.
For a sign of Minnesota's openness, one need look no further than Abdi Mohamed, whose Lincoln Town Car cruises through downtown Minneapolis on a Friday night.
Mohamed moved to Minnesota in 1998 after spending two months in San Diego. Somali friends told him of this faraway place where it was easy to find work on assembly lines or in other low-skilled jobs.
"They say, 'Come to Minneapolis, there's a lot of jobs. It's cold! But it's fun. It's a nice city,'" he recalled. "Later I find out it's fun and a nice city."
To Mohamed, Minnesota is an accepting place.
"You come to Minnesota, you don't know the language, you have never been in this weather, you don't know the culture, you don't know the people, and people welcome you," he said. "You apply for a job, and they may not understand half of what you're saying, but they give you a job. I think I can say that's nice."