Safer spaces agreement for AFem2014

Introduction

We want this conference to be a space where people who are the target of gender oppression can feel safe sharing their experiences and skills. (By this, we mean people that experience sexism, misogyny, transmisogyny, cissexism, transphobia and binarism.)

We recognise that many of us will have experienced forms of oppression that are common in anarchist organising - racism, sexism, transmisogyny and whorephobia, to name a few.

We also recognise that many of us have used oppressive language and behaviour on past occasions.

This is a guide to what we expect from participants in AFem, and what we will do to support them to avoid using oppressive language and behaviour.

We are asking everyone who participates to agree to abide by this set of guidelines, because in this way we believe we can dismantle power dynamics, make a more egalitarian space, and reduce the likelihood of reproducing the everyday oppressions we encounter elsewhere.

** TRIGGER WARNING: the following guidelines contain examples of oppressive language and behaviour, and may therefore be triggering. **

Guidelines

Participants should:

1. use trigger warnings when appropriate. Also, given that people can be triggered by anything, people should consider the people around them, and give space to people if they are triggered by a discussion.
2. avoid making assumptions about people’s gender based on their appearance or their name. This means asking what pronouns (e.g. "she/her") people prefer, rather than guessing.
3. be aware of power dynamics (e.g. sexism) and how they affect our actions.
4. listen and learn from the discussion, rather than speaking, if it’s an issue outside of their own personal experience.
5. be aware that if they are part of a privileged group, they may be enforcing oppressive norms by either what they’re talking about or how they’re talking about it.
6. make sure they speak in a clear way, avoiding or explaining any jargon or acronyms.
7. take a believing stance towards those speaking about their own experiences of violence, and avoid all forms of apologism for violence, particularly victim-blaming and gaslighting.
8. bear in mind that others may find traumatic discussions intimidating, triggering or draining, and make sure discussion of traumatic subjects (such as sexual violence) is entered into with appropriate care, using trigger warnings and making space for those who wish to discuss (or not to discuss) their own experiences
9. avoid:

1. sexist language or behaviour
2. transphobic language or behaviour e.g. excluding trans women from discussions aimed at women
3. binarist language or behaviour e.g. splitting a group into “men and women”, excluding non-binary people from discussions aimed at trans people
4. homophobic language or behaviour
5. biphobic language or behaviour, e.g. excluding bi people from discussions aimed at queer communities
6. whorephobic language or behaviour e.g. not treating sex work as work
7. racist language or behaviour e.g. “I only ever get street harassed by black men”, derailing discussions about race, making derogatory generalisations about racialised faiths, especially Islam
8. cultural appropriation - avoid taking parts of cultures (like language or dress e.g. a bindi or a Native American war bonnet) that they have a colonial relationship to, and using them for their own gratification. We ask that participants consider why they’re doing this (e.g. colonialism, white supremacy) and listen when challenged about it by people of colour.
9. ableist language or behaviour e.g. blocking wheelchair access to a room
10. body shaming (ourselves or others) e.g. “too fat / tall / ugly”
11. ageist language or behaviour

1. remember it is up to every individual person in the space to challenge oppressive behaviour and language when they see it, if they feel capable (not everyone will).
2. remember that some people are more affected by certain issues than others – e.g. men often don’t find sexist behaviour hard to deal with – and so the burden for “calling people out” should not be just on those personally affected by oppressive actions.
3. remember it can be very scary, even in a supportive space, to call out (for example) a man on their sexist language. It’s helpful to actively support anyone that does call people out if you agree with them, e.g. by nodding when they do it.
4. maintain the confidentiality agreed in each discussion and avoid outing queer people, trans people, people with hidden disabilities, and survivors of violence, if they disclose their identities within a confidential discussion.

What will organisers do to support the safer spaces agreement?

1. We have provided quiet space to read the safer spaces agreement and will explain the content and the thinking behind it when asked. If you would prefer, a safer spaces volunteer can read and discuss the agreement with you.
2. We have asked the facilitator of each session to make space at the start of sessions to read through the safer spaces agreement.
3. We have asked the facilitator of each session to ask for volunteers at the beginning of each session to pay close attention to language and behaviour in the session, if there are not safer spaces volunteers available.
4. We will specifically not police how participants in the space call people out on their oppressive behaviour. Some people get very angry when they are faced with oppressive behaviour - which is fair enough.
5. We have provided listeners in a quiet space for those who are triggered by discussions.

What happens if people don’t respect this agreement?

Expressions of oppressive beliefs, dogmas, and/or politics will not be tolerated. Sometimes, people just aren’t aware that they are acting in silencing or oppressive ways. Where possible, give people a chance to stop if they breach the safer spaces agreement. We recommend the following steps:

i. a participant experiences or witnesses abusive behaviour from another person.

ii. the participant raises the issue themselves or asks the facilitator to raise the issue.

iii. the participant or facilitator asks the person to stop the language or behaviour that’s causing the problem.

iv. the participant or facilitator asks the person to agree to abide by the safer spaces agreement.

If you have been called out on your behaviour or actions, then consider taking some time out from the session to reflect on what happened, and potentially talk things through with a safer spaces volunteer. When you feel ready, then you can rejoin a session, as long as you agree to abide by the safer spaces agreement.

However if the person in question does not stop or will not agree to abide by the safer spaces agreement, then the person should leave the event. If the person in question refuses to leave voluntarily, then our AFem2014 safer spaces volunteers can be called to deal with the issue.

What if my abuser is at AFem?

People who have perpetrated interpersonal violence and/or harassment are not welcome in this space (unless they are working through and sticking to an accountability process, and they are here with the express permission of the survivors).

If you have experienced violence and/or harassment from another person in this group and feel unsafe around them, please talk to one of the AFem2014 volunteers and we will make sure they are removed as soon as practically possible, or ask the people around you for support.

You can contact the Safer Spaces team for AFem2014 in advance on the conference at saferspacesafem@gmail.com, to ask questions about the agreement, or to let us know any information. To be clear: this inbox is run by a team who take a believing stance on abuse, and who will respect any wishes for confidentiality.

What if I have questions about this agreement?

On the day, there will be Safer Spaces volunteers throughout the venue that you can talk to about anything to do with this and your safety. You can contact the Safer Spaces team for AFem2014 in advance on the conference at saferspacesafem@gmail.com.