Live at the Table: Shooting the Moon Pt 2
Transcribed by Lucy @battlestarvalk[1]
Settling In [00:00:00 - 00:07:28] 1
Reviewing the Rules [00:07:28 - 00:09:38] 9
Scene One - Carroway [00:09:38 - 00:43:33] 10
Scene Two - Mellow [00:43:33 - 00:49:48] 34
Scene Three - Dovie [01:10:32 - 01:16:10] 49
Winding Down [01:43:03 - End] 72
Jack: Hi.
Ali: Hi!
Jack: Hello.
Janine: Hi. Hello.
Jack: I went and got some coffee.
Ali: Mmm!
Jack: Oh—
Ali: I have some seltzer.
Jack: Amazing. What flavour?
Ali: Uh, raspberry lime, of course.
Jack: Is that the one we had in Vancouver?
Ali: Probably, that’s the one that I look for. Okay, the seltzer that I drink is Polar raspberry lime. Polar’s the best seltzer brand but they’re like, only available on the east coast.
Jack: Mm.
Ali: I think they’re only based out of Massachusetts
Jack: I thought it was a flavour for a second. [laughs, Ali laughs] Like some non-specific flavour, I thought you were listing two flavours. The flavours I like are polar, and raspberry-lime.
Ali: Mm, I’d love to have a polar flavoured seltzer.
Jack: Mm. [cat meows in Ali’s audio] Meow?
Janine: I think that’s just soda water?
Jack: No, I think a polar flavoured seltzer has a sort of a pine, like a pleasant pine-y flavour.
Ali: Oh! Okay…
Jack: Maybe like a little smokey, smokeyness. I have a question that we have to address before we continue, since we’re talking about the North Pole. You know at the North Pole, where Santa lives. [Ali confirms] There are those red and white candy striped, like, the North Pole is like that, right?
[pause]
Ali: Wait. [Jack laughs]
Janine: You mean in real life or in fiction?
Jack: In fiction! In fiction.
Janine: Okay. Mm-hm!
Jack: Is it—does it taste—does it taste like—is it a candy pole, or does it just look like it’s candy striped?
Janine: No, I think it’s like Santa trying to signal for a barber to show up because he needs a haircut [Jack laughs] real bad—
Jack: [laughing] Oh, because he needs a haircut.
Janine: But a barber never shows up because it’s the North Pole.
Jack: Right. And he can’t cut his hair himself, because it’s like a union thing.
Janine: Yeah. He doesn’t have YouTube, he doesn’t know.
Ali: Elves can cut hair!
Jack: No, they can’t! That’s a thing about elves!
Janine: [crosstalk] No, but they’re so small—
Ali: [laughing] How is that a thing about elves?
Jack: Haven’t you seen all the elves in Lord of the Rings?
Janine: Ah, that’s true, and that’s the same kind of elf.
Ali: [laughing] Wh—
Janine: Certifiably. That’s true. That’s where they all went.
Ali: Is that a Lord of the Rings thing?
Jack: Oh, they just have very very long hair in Lord of the Rings.
Janine: Yeah.
Ali: Yeah. Is it because they can’t cut their hair?
Jack: No, I think they can, I don’t know. [laughing] I just- I just thought it’d be funny to—
Janine: [ laughing] Just doing a comedy, it’s just,
Jack: I’m just—I’m just doing a bit. I’m just doing a classic elf bit.
Ali: [laughing] You should say yes, ‘cause I believe you.
Jack: Oh yes—elves, the real creature, the elf [laughs] cannot cut its own hair, or others’.
Janine: That’s also why Solas is so special, because he just naturally has no hair [Ali gasps], and everyone’s like “How does he do it?”
Jack: Yeah, but if he did, he couldn’t cut it.
Janine: Yeah.
Jack: Yeah.
Ali: Huh.
Jack: Baldest elf in the West, that’s—that’s… [trails off]
Janine: Call me, BioWare.
[Ali, Jack laugh]
Jack: Uh, welcome back, everybody.
Ali: Yes, welcome back. We are here playing Shooting the Moon once again, my cat is in my room and this is going to be a louder stream now. Um… [laughs] do you hear that?
Jack: Yeah, is it kicking stuff over?
Janine: Did you say louder, because I think you meant better?
Jack: Yeah, yeah. Louder and better.
Ali: I put a bunch of tissue paper inside of a big box.
Jack: Oh, I’ve seen this picture!
Ali: That [laughs] PS3—PS4s get shipped into and it’s been really a big hit. [Ali, Jack laughs] So I’m very glad. This one’s a loud hit but it’s fine, we’re fine. We’re back playing Shooting the Moon, we have said everybody else, we just need to make names and say who these characters are and hop in! Does anybody want to start?
Jack: Janine, you said you had a name, right?
Janine: I do. The name that I have is Dovie Bluet, or Dove’s Wings Bluett. [Ali laughs] Bluet like B-L-U-E-T—everyone’s laughing?
Ali: [laughing] No—
Janine: [laughs] Why is that? How about I type it.
Ali: [still laughing] That’s why I was laughing, because I was like wait, I’m not— [laughing] you decided…
Jack: We’ve just been paralysed by…
Ali: It’s a supportive laugh. Dovie Bluett. That’s a great name. Jack, did you think of a name while you were getting coffee?
Jack: Yeah, I think I’m gonna be called Carroway Sticklepath.
Ali: Wow.
Jack: Carroway like the seed. Oh, I’ll type this.
Ali: [laughing] Okay. Sure. Perfect.
Janine: I love that we all took a break and then came back and were like, how can we make this as hard as possible for Ali?
[Ali laughs]
Jack: [muttering] Carroway.
Janine: We could just make names that are just complete nonsense.
Jack: [laughing, continuing] Sticklepath.
Ali: Do you guys remember how many times I forgot… [deliberates, laughs] Peccary?
Janine: [crosstalk as Ali laughs] Peccary’s right, yeah.
Jack: Oh, yeah, right, the little creature? You forgot that basically every time its name was required.
Janine: It’s a hard one, look.
Ali: It’s not easy!
Janine: It’s not in common use.
Ali: Um… it just isn’t easy.
Janine: It also sounds like a Japanese soft drink, so… what are you gonna do?
Ali: Oh, yeah. Boy, I am—I am outclassed here. I am gonna go with, I just had one, where did it go. [pauses] I’m looking at a list of flowers. [laughs, pauses]
Janine: You know what I always forget? Oh, wait, no, I’m thinking of something else, never mind… Or wait, no—is—is Madeline also a flower or am I thinking of Marguerite?
Jack: Madeline is like a little biscuit.
Janine: Marguerite is a flower. Oh right, Madeline is a cookie, okay, right.
Jack: It’s that little biscuit that Proust eats, and he remembers a time in days gone by.
Janine: [laughs] Of course.
Ali: I am going with Mellow Aster.
Jack: Oh! Wow!
Janine: Ooh.
Jack: Hey, Mellow, how good are you at making dogs’ faces? Quick Q.
Janine: Also, do you know Loyal Duncan? [Jack laughs]
Jack: Oh, yeah! Mellow Aster and Loyal Duncan!
[Ali laughs]
Janine: Do we need to do a swap around? [laughs]
Ali: I’ve seen Loyal around town, they’re a great kid, and my dog faces are improving by the day.
[Jack, Janine laugh]
Janine: That’s what you wanna see on your report card.
Jack: Exactly! [Ali laughing] It’s all about improvement, ‘cause what you really don’t want is a sort of devolution of dog face quality. You don’t want them to be getting worse.
Ali: [laughing] I am gonna close my door a little bit. Y’all can banter a lil.
Jack: How’s it going, Janine? Are you ready to do some banter? [laughs]
Janine: I think so.
Jack: [laughs] A thing we’re so good at, we have a podcast about it. Yeah.
Janine: [inaudible crosstalk]
Jack: Well, I’m done.
Janine: Mm-hm. That’s everything. I think we’re ready to resolve the game.
[pause, Janine and Jack laugh]
Janine: We’ve made all the jokes we possibly can.
Ali: And we’re back. No more jokes?
Jack: Sorry.
Janine: No more jokes, we’re done.
Jack: No more jokes. Sorry.
Ali: We’re a joke-free stream from now on. [Jack and Janine agree solemnly] Let’s get into the game for real! I’m just gonna—okay, I’m just gonna give a high level, again, of what this is, basically. [laughs]
So, the first scene we set up a scene with the Beloved, alone, thinking about their dream, whatever. [laughs] It’s called the Prologue. Then we move on to Round 1.
First it’s gonna be Jack’s turn. So, Janine, you’re gonna set up a scene for Jack, and then Jack is going to enter that scene and explain how they are trying to appeal to you in some way, or reach for their prize, or whatever else.
And then I am gonna listen to that scene and then be like ‘Ha ha ha, you’re not gonna beat me!’ and then I am going to introduce a hurdle. [laughs] And then, from that, y’all get three responses, and you work together.
So one of you responds, I am going to use my trait in this way to get over this hurdle, another could say that I am going to use my trait in this way to get over this hurdle, and then… the third one is up for grabs. You can use a second trait, you can suggest something to another player. Whatever else. You can just think of another idea. And then you roll them and then we see who wins. But, I am going to start actually reading from… this book now… So, yeah! [laughs]
[reading] The game begins with a brief scene focusing on the Beloved called the Prologue. Choose to narrate or play the scene as followed… So if you want to just narrate it, the Beloved player describes the Beloved in their daily life contemplating their dream and introduces the opportunity. Describe what the dream means to the Beloved, illustrate how the Beloved feels about the opportunity—the obstacle. Have the Beloved show how drawn they are to both of the suitors. Or you can just say all those things out loud, or you can play it as a scene. Um… So…. there you go. [laughs]
Janine: Um, I think… Okay. [pause] I think this first scene should probably just be narration. I think this first scene is, like, both of the suitors have made themselves known and, like, their work known. Maybe it’s even a thing of, like, Dovie goes to the market looking for, you know, she has to replace her fucking ex who dumped her for a department store, who the fuck does that? Replace her ex sounded weird [laughs] but you know what I mean! In terms of their role at the store and the like.
So she goes to the market, the craft market where a lot of people are selling their stuff and picks up a bunch of things, and there are two things that like really, really stand out to her. She thinks. Because she’s looking for someone she can bring in who will really, like, really take her stuff to the next level, because there’s only so much you can do in terms of growing on your own. And she knows that. It has to be collaborative, it has to be… The best way to advance your knowledge is through collaboration and experimentation and things like that.
So she goes to the market and ends up picking up… you know, a bunch of stuff, but the two things that stand out are: this cat with just an amazing face, [Jack, Ali laughs], it just has such an amazing face. The little eyes, it’s all perfect, there’s a little bit of fabric stitched over the eyes so it’s like an eyelid and it just gives them a really nice shape. The whiskers are rooted in there, and they’re like stiff, but they’re not too stiff. They’re not like thread- they’re not too soft. It’s just a really exceptional—the legs are just terrible, [Jack laughs] but like, you know, you can work with that.
And the other thing that stands out to her is this dog that just has this terrible, terrible, terrible face. Just like, it almost like—the features, to her, look like they were placed on upside-down. Still on the right positions for a face, but each individual feature upside down. But then she tries unstitching and correcting them and it still doesn’t look right and she’s not really sure, honestly, what the problem is there. [Ali laughs] But! The tail wags, it keeps perfect time, it’s like a fucking metronome. But it’s just like, it’s silent, it looks—it’s so realistic, nobody’s seen anything like it, but the face—wow. [pause, all laugh] So—so this is how…
Ali: [laughing] We get it, it’s a bad face.
Janine: [laughs] So this is how Dovie becomes aware of Mellow and Carroway, and sort of—
Jack: [interrupts] We should—
Janine: Yeah, sorry. What?
Jack: We should do pronouns, as well.
Ali: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Janine: Yes, yeah.
Jack: I’m sorry, I interrupted you. Carry on.
Janine: No, Ali put the correct ones on for Dovie. Dovie is she/her.
Ali: I’m gonna say Mellow is also she/her.
Jack: And I’m gonna say Carroway is also she/her!
Ali: Okay!
Janine: Yeah.
Ali: And Duncan was he/him?
Jack: [laughs] I think so.
Janine: Oh, yeah, Loyal Duncan.
Jack: A lil’ urchin lad?
Ali: [laughs] I thought that’s what you said before, so if you want to do something else then we can… write…
Jack: I also just wanna shout out that Annie—dancynrew on twitter—has already—Annie has already gotten to business. Let me bring these up, because it’s incredible. [Ali laughs] Are you sure you want to leave YouTube, yes. So here we have Loyal Duncan and Stacey Lane, and we have—I’ve put this in the discord as well.
Janine: Oh good, thank you.
Jack: And we have Ransom the horse. [Ali laughs] Who is, you know—
Ali: Ransom looks great, that’s incredible.
Jack: That’s a strong gaze, I would say.
Ali: Uh-huh!
Janine: That’s very good. Damn!
Ali: The most powerful horse.
Jack: Yeah.
Ali: Um… Okay! Sorry, Janine. Back to you.
Janine: Oh, no, it’s good. Is there anything else I need to hit on here?
Ali: Not really? I guess you have described going to see toys, so you can make it to the list? I don’t know if you want to involve the department store in this, but I think we… [trails off]
Janine: Yeah… I mean I think the scene I’m mostly narrating here is like that’s stuff that’s established that she’s aware of, but this moment is like her at her sort of work table, pulling apart these two toys that she thinks are kind of the pick of the litter and being like “Okay, I wanna understand their work.”
Ali: Oooh, okay. [laughs] Perfect. So that is the Prologue. Then we are going to move on to the first player’s turn, which is going to be you, Jack.
Jack: Hm.
Ali: [away from microphone] Oh, and you’re still in here! I love you— [back to microphone] Okay, hold on. [all laugh]
In any given turn, the two players narrate how their characters pursue their goals and one player creates opposition for the others. So, suitor turn… each turn takes place— [laughs] each player takes a turn in taking an active part in courting the Beloved-
[breaks off, speaking away from microphone] I’m so, so sorry, just give me like one second.
[Jack laughs, pause]
Ali: [laughing, to microphone] In Suitor turns the active Suitor teams up with the Beloved to participate in the scene and potentially gain points towards winning the game. Ah— [pauses] So, a Suitor turn begins in free play, which focuses on the interaction between the active player, which is Carroway, and the Beloved, which is [testing pronunciations] Dovvey? Dovvey? Dohvey? Dovvey?
Janine: Dove-y! Dovvy?!
Ali: Dovie! Like the bird, like the bird, Dovie, right. [laughs]
Janine: Dovie. Yeah. It’s a pet name, it’s a pet name that she goes by.
Ali: Uh-huh. Right.
Janine: Dovvy?!
Ali: Dovvy! [laughs]
Jack: [laughing] Dovvy.
Janine: [laughing] All this work! All this work, for nothing!
[pause as all laugh]
Ali: [still laughing, reading] During this phase, talk about what your characters say, see, do, describe your characters and their surroundings and interact with one another as if you are characters which… you know. And then, so it says that the Beloved should set the scene and that the active Suitor suggests locations and things like that but we do this a lot, so. Jack, if you wanna set the scene and then Janine can involve herself however she’d like, that’s fine. I’m gonna open the door for this cat real quick! [laughing, Janine laughs]
Jack: [laughing] Okay… oh, wow. Do you have a particular location in mind? Do you know where you would sort of hunt me down to be like, who made this dang cat?
Janine: I think it would be one of those things where Dovie like, asks around the market like, where can I find Carroway. [Jack agrees] Right now. Where’s she usually hang out, I wanna talk with her.
Jack: Her, I think Carroway has like, you know, has gotten up this morning and it’s really cold and she lives in like a little—I guess an apartment building on the side of this mountain. And she’s gotten up in the morning and wrapped her scarf around her and, you know, gone down and there’s like, breath in the air and, you know, ruddy cheeks because it’s cold, and she’s gone into the Glacier Express and ordered a huge mug of coffee and a apple and cinnamon strudel and is just sitting down. And I think we see her and she’s writing in her journal. She’s just like ‘Cold morning today!’ Um. [laughs] What else do you write when it’s cold? [Janine laughs]
Jack [as Carroway, narrating the journal]: Cold morning today! Nearly slipped on the ice. Passed Loyal on the way here. Hoping it’s going to be a clear day with not a lot of snow. Eating a nice strudel.
Janine: [pause] Yeah, I think this is the point that Dovie walks in on, and probably—I would say recognises Carroway from the market, right? Carroway would be selling her own stuff?
Jack: Mm-hm. Mm-hm.
Janine: Or is that what Loyal Duncan’s for? [laughs]
Jack: No, I think it’s a bit of both. I mean, I don’t know whether or not Duncan and my arrangement is a professional one. I do not know whether or not a thing about—a flaw about Carroway Sticklepath is employment of an urchin. [laughs]
Janine: Does Duncan have, like, a wonderful singing voice and is just like that kid from Sweeney Todd who sings about the pies?
Jack: Oh yeah, Duncan absolutely has a wonderful singing voice and is that kid who sings…
Janine: [interjecting] He sings about cats?
Jack: No… I don’t just make cats. I mean, we can have this conversation! [all laugh]
Janine: Fair.
Jack: Yeah, I think Carroway just looks up at the sound of the little bell in the coffee shop, and sees Dovie there.
Janine: I think Dovie is carrying a stuffed cat that has been pulled apart. Not with malice! [laughs] Has not been pulled apart with malice, but it’s like the—what’s the least disturbing way for that to be pulled apart? [pauses] I think maybe it’s been unstitched along the seams. [Jack laughs] And hasn’t been fully restitched? Like it’s been mostly restitched, but there’s a gap where it’s open because she like just, just, just restuffed it on her way out the door. Because she realised, she was on her way out the door with, like, a stuffed cat skin? And was like oh, this is kind of hostile. [Jack laughs] So she last minute just jammed the stuffing back in and then ran off to try and catch Carroway. I think she puts it on the table, like:
Janine [as Dovie]: You made this, right?
Jack [as Carroway]: Oh! Hi! Uh—yeah, this is—this is one of mine. Did it break?
Janine [as Dovie]: No, I actually did this, it’s fine, I can—it’s fine. Hi, I’m Dovie Bluett.
Jack [as Carroway]: Hi!
Janine [as Dovie]: I run the toy—
Janine: We didn’t name the toy shop. [laughing, Ali laughs]
Jack: Oh, god.
Janine: [still laughing] We named everything but the toy shop! We named a powerful horse before we named the toy shop!
Jack: Is it called like, Dove’s Wings toy— [trails off, unsure. Janine laughing] We named a powerful horse before we named the toy shop!
Janine: May- maybe it’s just called like Little Bluett’s, or something? I don’t know…
Ali: Little… excuse me?
Janine: Little… Little Bluett’s? No that doesn’t work, does it? [Ali laughs]
Ali: Oh…
Janine: Bleuet means blueberry in French… I should clarify that it’s not, I didn’t intend it as a—it’s fine.
Ali: Little Bluett’s is fine.
Janine: It could be anything.
Ali: [laughing] Okay.
Janine: It could be… anything in the world.
Jack: That’s the problem, isn’t it? It could be anything in the world!
Ali: [laughing] It could be anything. It could be literally anything.
Janine: It could be called—it could be called Anything. Like actually. It could be called Penny Anything’s toy store. It could be Anything.
Jack: Oh! Okay! No, we did it! We did— [laughs]
Ali: Penny Anything? It’s like a—
Jack: Aw, the thing is that Penny Anything is a great name for a character and I worry that— [Janine laughs] I worry that if we name a toy store Penny Anything…
Janine: [crosstalk] You don’t want it to waste it? That’s fine… that’s fair.
Ali: [laughing] Also it implies that everything in the store is a penny and it isn’t and it’s gonna be a whole conversation…
Jack: No, that is absolutely true.
Janine: They’ve got a bunch of stuff that would be a penny, but.
Ali: Well.
Janine: It could be Penny Manythings.
Ali: [crosstalk] Penny Manythings is—
Jack: [crosstalk] Penny Manythings is the name of a mouse nursemaid in— [trails off, Janine laughs]
Ali: Penny Manythings is such a good name for this store though, I don’t want to distract from that.
Jack: God… Penny Manythings?
[Ali laughs]
Janine: Here’s the thing—we can call it that and also if someday we really wanna have a character named that, [crosstalk] it’s just a fun throwback everyone thinks is cute and then we can have it both ways.
Jack: [crosstalk] Yeah, I’m coming around real hard on Penny Manythings. It’s Penn—it’s Penny like the woman’s name, and then Many hyphen Things? Or is there no hyphen? How’s this spelt, Janine?
Janine: Uh, I think it’s probably like Penny like the currency, or like the name, and Many hyphen Things.
Ali: Okay. With the hyphen?
Janine: Yeah. I love a hyphen.
Ali: [laughing] I know that about you. I’m sorry. I do know that about you.
Jack: Penny Many-Things.
Ali: Okay. There we go. So now we know it’s there.
Jack: Where is it, too? Where’d you put it?
Ali: It’s on top of where it says aspiring toy makers? Beloved owns a fancy toy shop, Penny Many-Things— [trails off]
Jack: Ooh! Down—
Ali: I’m just gonna write “toy shop”.
Janine: Perfect.
Jack: Down there, yeah.
Janine: I’m gonna put that on the Beloved character card too.
Ali: Okay, cool, perfect.
Janine: I made a blue dot instead. [laughing]
Ali: I love Roll20!
Janine: That’s a penny.
Jack: [laughing] Just a blue dot. Um.
Jack [as Carroway]: Oh, hi! Yeah! I know who you are. You run Penny Many-Things, right? It’s—it’s Dovie?
[Ali laughing in background]
Janine [as Dovie]: It’s Dovie, yeah.
Jack [as Carroway]: H-Hi.
Janine [as Dovie]: Hi. Um, so did you hear… uh…. This is kind of awkward, I don’t like to air my business, but, uh. You know that dep—
Janine: We named the department store, what’s the department’s—MaGuddans! [all laughing]
Ali: [laughing] MaGuddans.
Janine: I don’t—you know, I don’t normally think maybe we went too hard with the names, but this time— [laughing]
Jack: [crosstalk] Yeah, I was thinking—
Janine: [laughing, continues] I think maybe we went too hard on the names! [Ali laughs]
Jack: Are we about to be undone? [laughs]
Janine: We had to learn our lesson eventually. Um, so MaGuddans is— [breaks off] I need to say it with a straight face. [coughs]
Janine [as Dovie]: MaGuddans is opening up a toy department and my, ah…
Janine: And this is like her audibly pausing, before saying, like:
Janine [as Dovie]: Partner decided to go work for them, and help them build their toy section. And that… I’ve been having a really hard—I don’t really work well without, you know. I like having a collaborator. And I’m having a real hard time, uh, finding people who I think would be a good fit? And I just wanted to—to say hi, I guess? Because—
Jack [as Carroway, interrupting]: Hi!
Janine [as Dovie]: I really liked your cat.
Jack [as Carroway]: Oh! Thank you! The legs aren’t the right length.
[Ali laughs]
Janine [as Dovie]: That’s okay.
Jack: Carroway is just like, completely trying hard to like, play it cool and like, visibly failing? I think she’s blushing and is like—
Jack [as Carroway]: Wow, it’s busy in here today! Um. Well, I suppose if you want to talk about business, um… I mean, take a seat, they can bring you some strudel.
Jack: There’s like servers walking around with trays—the tables are like, little round tables packed close together, holiday decorations hanging from the ceiling.
Jack [as Carroway]: You’ve got a moment to sit and talk, right?
Janine [as Dovie]: Oh yeah, no, I mean, that’s—it’d be weird if I came here and—and didn’t, um.
Jack [as Carroway]: Right.
Janine [as Dovie]: If I just came here to show you this cat that I… unsewed.
Jack [as Carroway]: Oh, you killed it! Um…
Janine [as Dovie]: Oh—oh!
[Ali laughs]
Jack [as Carroway]: Okay! Um… Me? You want to work with me?
Janine [as Dovie]: I mean, maybe? I don’t really—I don’t really know you, you know? And, you know, I don’t really just want to have someone [pauses, sighs] You know, I thought I knew my partner, and that didn’t really work out great? So, I guess, actually, by that logic, working with a stranger isn’t really that much of a risk but I think it would still make me a little nervous, I just… you know.
Jack [as Carroway]: No, right, no, I understand! Um… What do you think you’re gonna—what do you think you’re gonna get? The chocolate is a little overrated. But, uh, I—the apple and cinnamon is my favourite, it makes for a great breakfast. They’re doing something with like orange and clove that is supposed to be good but I don’t like it very much.
Janine [as Dovie]: Oh… What, wait, what are they doing with orange and clove?
Jack [as Carroway]: It’s like chunks of—it’s like candied orange? I don’t know, I’ve had it once and—I didn’t… You know, it wasn’t for me. But it could be for you! You know, you might like it.
Janine [as Dovie]: Hmm. Maybe not for breakfast.
Jack [as Carroway]: No, maybe not for breakfast, no. Um.
Janine [as Dovie]: Clove is a very strong breakfast flavor, I’m not sure about that.
Jack [as Carroway]: That’s what I always think, you know! It’s a very strong breakfast flavour! I make things other than cats, you know.
Janine [as Dovie]: Yeah! I saw a bunch of stuff. I picked the cat ‘cause it had a nice face, but the other stuff was good too.
Jack [as Carroway]: The legs are a little...
Janine [as Dovie]: Yeah, but you can fix legs. Or you could make them lying down, and then it doesn’t matter ‘cause the legs are like all… you know?
Jack [as Carroway]: You could make them lying down!
[Ali laughs]
Jack [as Carroway]: That’s why you run Penny Many-Things!
Janine [as Dovie]: Oryou could make them sitting, because then their legs are different lengths, because that’s how they sit.
Jack [as Carroway]: Wow! Wow! [pauses] Well… there’s a lot to think about, you know? There’s a lot to think about here.
Ali: [laughs] Jack, as you’re saying that. Carroway, as you’re saying that. You see out of the corner of your eye that the train is coming around. [Jack, Ali laugh] And you’re still thinking about what you want, and you feel like you had a really good understanding of the menu, you even pitched to this beautiful person who’s come up to you and offered you your dream job. But there’s like, a dessert that you can’t tell what it is! And it looks like it’s made out of berries, but you don’t know what kind of berries, and also that’s not super seasonal but what if it is? What if it’s like amazing? And you are very easily distracted. [laughs] By.
Jack [as Carroway]: Oh my goodness! Oh! Oh my goodness! [Ali laughing] Uh, Dovie, this one’s—this is a new—um, sorry—
Jack: And I call over like, a server.
Jack [as Carroway]: Excuse me!
[Pause as Ali laughs]
Ali: [still laughing] Okay. So. I don’t know if this is how this game is supposed to work, but I have now introduced a hurdle. So at this point of the game, the scene pauses and I get five dice just for…
Jack: Showing up?
Ali: Introducing it. Yeah, so I’m just going to take my dice.
Jack: Okay.
Ali: And you guys get three responses, and if you— [laughs]
Jack: Three responses each?
Ali: No—three responses total.
Jack: Total. Okay.
Ali: That’s total. So you can see kind of at the bottom, the—where it says “3 Player: Suitor Turns”, “Hurdle: 3 Dice”. You get two dice if you use one of your own traits to get over this hurdle. I don’t want to speak for you but you could, as you’re speaking to the person or whatever, you could use one of your traits in some way to impress—whatever. And then you would get two dice for that. If you—if Janine did one, used one of her own traits you would get two dice. And then the third one, you either get to pick I have a really good idea, I’m wanna use my second trait in this way, then you would get one dice, or you can suggest something for another player, and then you would get two in that case.
Janine: We don’t have traits yet, right?
Ali: So it’s weird? You could use your attributes, and then you get more traits at the end.
Jack: Okay.
Ali: They’re like, used interchangeably and not interchangeably in the rules, and I—
Jack: That’s really weird.
Ali [continuing]: And I’m just going to like, this is the first turn.
Janine [crosstalk, laughing]: That’s really confusing.
Ali: Yeah, yeah. It’s so weird. [laughs] I think the thing that’s really confusing about it in the rules is that, like, is more clear I think is that it feels when you’re using them it feels like you’re burning them? Because that’s what we’re used to in games. But you only burn them during the Beloved turn. Everything that we have right now, we keep, and the things that you’re gonna gain from these scenes, you’re gonna keep, until you later in the game decide “I’m not this thing anymore, I’m a different thing”.
Jack: Right
Janine: Mm.
Ali: So that’s kind of how they’re used, yeah.
Jack: Okay [sighs] Okay. And Janine is trying to help me overcome this hurdle, right? Responses that Janine are suggesting is how… Dovie would sort of help?
Ali: Right, yeah, exactly. Unless Janine had a great suggestion for how you would use it—and then she would—
Jack: Oh, and could also.
Ali: Yeah. What’s going to happen here is that at the end of this, depending on the pool of dice that we have, we’re gonna roll them and then we’re gonna see who wins the scene. So if I win, neither of you get points towards your goal, and also I get to assign a trait to Carroway. If y’all win, I think that you get to… it doesn’t say it in these tiny mechanics, does it?
Jack: Let me— [trails off]
Ali: Maybe it doesn’t—no, it’s fine, I got it. There’s like a second pool, it’s like a whole thing. But… Okay. If y’all win, you each gain a new trait that you decide. You each get a point, and then you narrate the outcome of the scene. If I win, nobody gets any points, I narrate the end of the scene, and then I also give a trait to you, Jack. And if you decide— [laughs] if y’all decide “I don’t want to lose this scene”, I do what’s called a second pool. I will explain what that is when it comes to that part of this.
Jack: Okay. [laughs]
Ali: But if that happens I get to do a different… I get to also give Janine a bad trait, I believe.
Jack: Okay, okay.
Ali: [laughs] It’s the first time we’re doing it, so it’s going to be super confusing, and then we’re gonna know how to do it!
Jack: Yeah!
Janine: Yeah.
[Ali laughs]
Jack: Um… yeah, okay, so. Option one is: I use my trait “thoughtful” and when the server comes over, I impress Dovie by being just really charming and like, I know this person, I come here often, I have an awareness of the menu even when a new thing shows up. And I’m just like, my hope is that Dovie will come away from it like “oh, wow! She had a really nice interaction with this person, and that’s impressive”.
Ali: That works. You are assigned your two dice.
Jack: Thank you.
Janine: I’m going to use “patient”, because there is that sort of momentary diversion, but I don’t think it’s enough for Dovie to think like, I’m not being taken seriously or something, [Jack agrees] like someone who is really… quick to irritate would? It’s not a thing where she takes it personally, it’s like “oh, this person seems really enthusiastic about desserts” like, it’s fine.
Ali: [laughing] Perfect.
Janine: I don’t mind, I’m here to try new stuff.
Ali: Yeah. [pause] One more response, anyone’s game.
Jack: Hmm.
Janine: Do I like, maybe suggest that we split one, or something?
Jack: Ohh! Yeah! Yeah. That would get us 1 dice, right?
Janine: Does that qualify? ‘Cause like, oh, you know, trying a new thing is a little like, intimidating but like, you know, you eat half, I’ll eat half. Maybe it’ll be good.
Ali: Ooh… yeah!
Jack: It’s cute! It would also solve your breakfast problem.
Ali: Okay.
Janine: Yeah. [laughs]
Ali: Do you… do you feel like that’s using one of your traits, Janine?
Janine: Um… I thought that was like, suggest action for other character, but I’m not sure.
Ali: Okay, that works, yeah, yeah. I’m totally fine with us using the rules that way. So you have six dice, I have five. We are gonna roll them, and see who has the most 6s. The number doesn’t matter, just how many 6s there are.
Jack: Okay. I’m gonna roll mine. [pause]
Ali: Random side… [pause] Okay! So you win the scene!
Jack: Hey!
Ali: You have two 6s, and I only have one. So… we don’t have to worry about a second pool, which is great, because that is the most confusing part of this system! [laughs, Jack laughs] Um… but yeah, if the active Suitor and the Beloved win, y’all get to narrate the rest of the scene. You each get one point toward your goal and then you each get a new trait. That you choose.
Jack: Okay, um… Ali, can you be a waitress?
Ali: Yeah, absolutely.
Jack [as Carroway]: Hi! Oh! Hi, Jenny!
Ali [as Jenny]: Oh, Carroway, hi!
Jack [as Carroway]: I just thought I’d pop in for breakfast. Have you met Dovie?
Ali [as Jenny]: I haven’t! Hi, hi, hello.
Janine [as Dovie]: Hi.
Jack [as Carroway]: Dovie runs, uh, Penny Many-Things? It’s like a—it’s a really cool toy shop.
Ali [as Jenny]: Oh, I love that! I was just there that week with my cousin.
Jack [as Carroway]: Oh, really? What did you get him?
Ali [as Jenny]: [laughs] We got… a, it’s a little metal horse? That you wind up.
Jack [as Carroway]: Oh, wow!
Ali [as Jenny]: It’s amazing, yeah yeah yeah. I love it.
Jack [as Carroway]: [crosstalk] You hear that, Dovie?
Janine [as Dovie]: [crosstalk] I’m glad to hear that. Yeah.
Jack [as Carroway]: So I’m curious about… what’s this, what’s this one here? Is that like a cherry—like a kind of a chopped cherry?
Ali [as Jenny]: It is that, yeah, yeah. So what it is is that it’s like a—
Ali: [laughs] I was about to just say “fermented cherries” out loud, [Jack laughs] but I don’t know that that’s a thing. But it’s a magical land—
Ali [as Jenny]: So yeah, this is like a fermented cherry that’s soaked overnight in like a blackberry juice? So it’s a little tart, a little sweet, a little sour because [laughs] I guess it’s fermented! But it’s also in like a pastry, it’s amazing, very… you know. It has depth, in a way you don’t think of desserts. We’re very excited to have it as part of our holiday collection ‘cause it’s very decadent.
Jack [as Carroway]: Is it the holiday collection time already?
Ali [as Jenny]: Yeah! I can’t believe it… we just—we still have pumpkin…. juice…
Jack [as Carroway]: I love pumpkin juice!
Ali [as Jenny, crosstalk, laughing]: In the back room!
Jack [as Carroway]: You know, I didn’t think I would when you put it on the menu. I thought—Dovie, it sounds really bad, I don’t mean to be rude, pumpkin juice, it doesn’t sound great. But then I tried some pumpkin juice and it’s actually, it’s really good. Do you want to split one of these with me? Because I don’t know if—I love fermented things but cherries? I’m not so sure on. So we could…
Janine [as Dovie]: Yeah, I like cherries.
Jack [as Carroway]: Oh! We can? Yeah! Okay, we’ll get one of these please.
Ali [as Jenny]: Wonderful! I’ll bring two spoons. Anything else?
Jack [as Carroway]: [suddenly hesitant] Um… no, I’m good, I think. I think I’m good.
[Janine starts laughing in the background]
Ali [as Jenny]: Okay, well, I’ll be right back.
Jack [as Carroway]: Wonderful, see you Jenny.
Janine: I’ve been picturing this as like a Danish? And then you said spoon? [Ali laughs]
Jack: Yeah, I was just like, I think— [trails off]
Janine: I was like man, that’s a big—honestly, big central Danish that you need two spoons for sounds great also! [Ali continues to laugh]
Jack: Actually, I think Carroway leans over to Dovie and is like— [laughs] is like—
Jack [as Carroway]: Yeah, they keep giving me spoons. I don’t know, maybe it’s like a—you’d think I think one of those forks with like a little knife on the side? But it’s just spoons! This is a great place, but like… and I don’t wanna say anything!
Janine [as Dovie]: I mean, it must be working for them, in some way.
Jack [as Carroway]: It’s kind of difficult to eat, but the strudels are so good that I don’t really wanna—I don’t really wanna complain.
Janine [as Dovie]: I mean, you would be surprised what some people—what some people like, do for—you know—our number one selling thing at the toy store? You’re never gonna guess what it is. It’s like—
Jack [as Carroway]: What—what is it?
Janine [as Dovie]: So it’s not—everyone’s like “oh, is it the dog”—it’s not the dog. It’s, ah. You know. You know those little discs? Those little painted discs? We don’t even sell them with string, but people just snap ‘em up. It’s just—you just—there’s a bunch of different stuff. You know, one of them we got like—one of them is like a horse on one side and on the other side there’s a rider, and on one there’s like a—there’s one of those automobiles without the top? And then on the other side there’s like, a lady with a scarf?
Jack [as Carroway]: Wow!
Janine [as Dovie]: And there’s like a bird one—the bird one’s boring, everyone has a bird one.
Jack: Carroway has just like, leaned forward on her, like resting her elbow on the table and her chin on her fist and is like, kind of like doing that thing where you’re very obviously listening to someone? And like nodding her head and being like ‘Yeah, keep talking about toys! This is… this is the owner of Many Penny—Penny Many-Things!’ [Ali and Janine laugh]
Janine: Many Penny Things also works, though, is the thing.
[pause, all laugh]
Jack: Strangely, that waitress’s name was Jenny Many-Pennies?
[pause, all laugh]
Ali: Yeah, I didn’t say, my cousin works at this store.
Jack: Oh, right, yeah. Oh, you’re back.
Jack [as Carroway]: This looks amazing!
Ali [as Jenny, still laughing]: Here’s your spoons!
Jack: [crosstalk] And like Carroway just like, flashes Dovie a look.
Janine [crosstalk]: That’s not—
Jack: Okay. So I’m going to take the trait… do I get to decide the trait? Or does Dovie?
Ali: Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is all you.
Jack: Okay… I’m going to take the trait… and these traits can be really, really weirdly broad?
Ali: Super broad.
Jack: Like newer person… Okay, I think the trait that I’m going to pick—and I’ll write this down so you don’t have to write everything down—is… [typing] “shared a lovely breakfast”. And I think the camera kind of comes out a little and we get the, like the view through the window of this, like frosty window of this little strudel shop, the people inside eating the strudels. And we get that classic romantic comedy shot of like, Carroway and Dovie talking but we can’t hear what they’re saying. And we’re just like, seeing them have this conversation. The camera pulls away through this little alpine town. And the scene ends.
Ali: [coos] Beautiful.
Janine: These traits are very much like Sims traits, aren’t they?
Jack: They really are, aren’t they?
Janine: They could be anything from “happy” to “just worked out in front of a hot person”.
[Ali laughing]
Jack: “Broke out, broke a bath!”
Ali: I—it’s weird, I kinda feel like it’s almost building an inventory for your character?
Jack: Yeah, that’s really cool.
Ali: In terms of what this game thinks of… things as? [laughs]
Janine: You also take a point, right?
Jack: Oh, yeah, I do take a point!
Ali: Yeah. Both of you get a point.
Janine: We each take a point?
Ali: Yep.
Jack: Okay.
Janine: Do I also need to come up with a trait, or does Jack come up with a trait?
Ali: You come up with your own trait.
Janine: Okay.
[beat]
Jack: …shit! [laughs] That’s not right.[2]
[pause as Ali laughs, all laugh]
Jack: [still laughing] Okay.
Ali: [laughing] I love Janine’s single line and… Jack’s whole box!
Janine: The extra large brush fits very nicely in it.
Jack: [laughing] Yeah, it—
Janine: Oh, that’s also not—
Ali: [laughs and wheezes] That’s also not it!
Jack: [laughing] I didn’t—Okay, how do I… okay, here we go. Do I just—yeah. Yep, there we go. Okay, all right. I got it. There!
[pause, Ali is still laughing]
Ali: Wonderful. Um. Perfect, okay, so now it’s my scene. Okay.
Janine: I’m taking “tried a new dessert” as a trait.
Jack: Ooh.
Ali: Oh, okay!
Jack: You’re really leaning into the Sims stuff, huh? [Ali laughs]
Janine: [laughs] Yes. Now that I’ve identified it, yes.
Ali: Oh, it’s kind of like, oh, you tried a new dessert, so you’re feeling happy today. Or like, I watched a movie, so I’m horny now. [laughs, Jack laughs] I love the Sims.
Jack: Oh, the Sims is so good.
Ali: [laughing] This is great… Okay. Janine, do you want to set up the scene? ‘Cause I can do that, and then you can kinda come in. Either way.
Janine: Um… whichever? It depends on—I think it’d probably be the same set up as with Carroway of just like, where does Mellow hang out, where could I find Mellow right now?
Ali: Yeah. [laughs] I was thinking of setting up the scene in Penny Many-Things?
Janine: Mm.
Ali: Like… Mellow doesn’t know that you bought her horrible dog toy. [laughs] Improving-by-the-day dog toy, and she’s just looking over the displays of animals that you have, and just like, very carefully like, like looking at them. Like, running her fingers over the stitches. In a very respectful way, but clearly a lot of affection for these toys, and also an understanding [laughs] of like, toy makeup.
Janine: I think that… maybe Dovie was looking for Mellow but everyone was just like “I don’t know where she is!” So she heads back to the shop, and she’s a little bit like, she’s a little bit dejected. She’s checking the—we never settled on a time here, so I’m just going to say she has a chatelaine with a little pocket watch on it because I think those things are cute and I like putting them on characters. [Ali laughs] So she’s like checking her little pocket watch, like, ‘I don’t—I need—okay I still have—there’s still time today’. And then just like Mellow is in her shop, and like, oh, that’s a wonderful little coincidence, so she walks up like very happy, very ebullient, like:
Janine [as Dovie]: Oh, you’re Mellow Aster! I’ve been looking for you!
Ali [as Mellow]: Oh, hi! Yeah, that’s—that’s me. And you are?
Janine [as Dovie]: I’m- I’m Dovie Bluet, I own the shop.
Ali [as Mellow]: [gasps] Oh my goodness! I was just admiring your dog toys. They’re beautiful.
Janine [as Dovie]: Thank you.
Ali [as Mellow]: Ah, just—just the industry’s finest.
Janine [as Dovie]: I mean, the face is good. The rest I think is industry standard, but the face is—that’s the… that’s where the money’s made.
Ali [as Mellow]: [sighs, chuckles] You’re telling me.
Janine [as Dovie]: I like your tail—your tail mechanism is—you know, the face isn’t important if you’ve got something else and you’ve got those tails and they… really wag!
[Ali laughs]
Ali [as Mellow]: It means a lot to hear you say that, thank you so much! I—you know, I… they were very hard to figure out, but just a little bit of- uh-
Ali: [laughs] What am I trying to say?
Ali [as Mellow]: You just put a little bit of carbonated water in there, that’s actually the trick.
[pause]
Janine: What.
Ali: [laughing] It’s a magical environment, I don’t know. The effervescence makes the tail wag—I don’t know, it’s magic, I don’t care.
Janine [as Dovie]: That makes sense. And then it effervesces. I was wondering how they managed to run so quietly. You know, ‘cause like—
Ali [as Mellow, crosstalk]: Yes, yes.
Janine [as Dovie]: [continues] Clockwork is so loud, and steam—you wouldn’t want steam in a stuffed animal, that would be very dangerous.
Ali [as Mellow]: Yeah, I really went through—I tried clockwork, and you were right, it was so loud. It was like—you know.
Janine [as Dovie]: Mm-hm. And there’s no charm in a big key sticking out of something’s butt! It just ruins the fantasy of having this nice little dog, you know?
Ali [as Mellow]: Yeah! I don’t walk down the street and see dogs with a big wind-up tool coming out of them. It just breaks the fantasy of having a nice dog that’s happy and wagging their tail.
Janine [as Dovie]: Mm, yeah.
Ali [as Mellow]: My goodness! I never thought that [laughs] the owner of Penny Many-Things would buy one of my toys. That means a lot that you would say that.
Janine [as Dovie]: Well… You know, I have been… looking for people I might want to work with, and part of that is, I need to see who in town is doing interesting things. Like things that are surprising. I like when I see something that I don’t immediately understand, that I don’t immediately… know how to duplicate. It’s kind of exciting, you know?
Ali [as Mellow]: My goodness, well I shouldn’t have just told you my secret, then. I mean, there’s a lot that goes into it.
Janine [as Dovie]: Well, you told me how it worked, but you didn’t tell me how you made it. That’s… [trails off]
Ali [laughing, as Mellow]: This is true, this is true. Uh—you’re gonna have to find that out later. Ha-ha.
[pause, Janine laughs, Ali laughs]
Janine [as Dovie]: Is that a challenge?
[Ali is still laughing, recovers]
Ali [as Mellow]: Well, I would be very interested to work for you, obviously. It’s—it’s Penny Many-Things!
Janine [as Dovie]: I’m still—you know, I don’t know for sure that I’m going to take anyone on. I don’t know, you know, I just wanna….
Ali [as Mellow]: Oh my goodness… no no no… heh, gosh! [laughs] I mean, just being able to talk to such a—not only established, but just ingenious toymaker such as yourself is such an honour.
Janine [as Dovie]: I mean, and also, you know, I know we joked a bit, but I’m not going to steal the tail thing, that’s—
Ali [as Mellow]: Oh! [laughs]
Janine [as Dovie]: It’s okay. Like, you told me. I’m not gonna try to reverse engineer that, I was just curious, like personally curious.
Ali [as Mellow]: Oh, my goodn—let me put it this way, I would not have said that out loud in Ma—
Ali: I was going to say MaGubbins, which it isn’t! [laughs]
Janine: [laughing] Oh my god.
Ali: Ma-Gawdins? Is that how we’re doing that?
Janine: MaGuddans!
Jack: And I think at that moment, there’s a—
Janine: [crosstalk] It’s just the best. Sorry.
Jack: [continuing] There’s a knock at the window. And the door to Penny Many-Things—actually, what does the inside of Penny Many-Things look like, Janine?
Janine: Uh… I cannot not imagine it as that Sephora store.
Jack: Yeah, totally!
Janine: I imagine it’s very brightly lit? Ah… there are a lot of shelves that are sort of up along the walls. I think it’s different than a modern toy store in that there aren’t, you know, it’s not an efficient use of shelf and floor space. It’s not like, a bunch of H-shape shelf configurations that box everything in. Everything is sort of on these shelfs along the walls, and then the middle space is sort of open for like, you know, there are some toys out of the boxes and, I don’t even know if there would even be boxes there—but whatever, there’s some toys that are like out where kids can run around and experience them properly versus just like, picking them up and standing in one place.
Jack: It’s like toy areas, little play areas?
Janine: Yeah… And just like space to run around without having to run into shelves, or without parents losing sight of them. It’s designed in a way that is like, completely sacrifices efficiency in favour of the human experience.
Jack: Yeah, and the shop bell rings. And into the shop comes a tall man, wearing a winter coat over a black suit, with like a little black tie, and he comes over to both of you, and he says—
Jack [as Mr Click]: Hello, my name is Mr Click. You might have heard of me. I’m the man in charge of MaGuddans. It’s very nice to make your acquaintance.
Ali [as Mellow]: ..Hello.
Janine [as Dovie]: Good to see you.
Jack [as Mr Click, with a mild accent]: Now, I couldn’t help but notice. You’re Mellow Aster, aren’t you?
Ali [as Mellow]: Oh, yes. Hi!
Jack [as Mr Click]: Yes, well, I had a look at that dog… at that dog that you made. That was you, wasn’t it?
Ali [as Mellow]: I—yeah, mm-hm, there is a dog that I make.
Jack [as Mr Click]: And that tail just goes, it just goes left and right, left and right, left and right, left and right, until the world would end, you know? Beautiful little construction. Anyway, none of our clocks in the store—you know the store—none of our clocks are striking on time. And we’ve got a little opening for someone, who can, you know, who is methodical enough to make something—to make something like that, you know, work, work well, and work, you know, effectively.
[Ali is softly laughing in the background throughout]
Jack: So he is making a challenge. [laughs] He will hire you, if you want, or he is essentially being like ‘Hey, yeah, come work in MaGuddans, we want our clocks to run on time’.
Ali: [laughing] Okay. I’m gonna give you your five dice.
Jack: Thank you.
Ali: That’s six, and I’m gonna take one away. Oh wait, you’re—yeah. And I’m going to first respond very impatiently, and say—
Ali [as Mellow]: I’m a toy designer. I don’t work with clocks.
Jack [as Mr Click]: Ah, well, there’s always room, isn’t there, to branch out.
[Ali laughs]
Jack [as Mr Click]: Move outside of our area of expertise. I was an accountant, you know, before they made me run a toy store?
Ali [as Mellow]: Quite the career change.
Ali: Janine?
Janine: Ah… mm. I wonder if Dovie has a, like, clockwork consultant that she works with sometimes, for fiddlier mechanisms? [Jack laughs]
Jack: I love to have a clockwork consultant.
[pause, Janine and Ali laugh]
Janine: Yeah, so I wonder if she’d—well, I don’t know if she’d volunteer them either. I was trying to think of like “Oh, maybe she would put someone’s name forward”, but also then she would risk losing that person, and also, if Mellow’s actually interested in this opportunity, she would feel bad about stamping it out, just to be like, well, maybe I’ll hire you, I don’t know!
Ali: Yeah, I mean, there’s two things here, which is like I think Mellow is obviously, like genuinely annoyed, and that’s readable. And then the other thing is like, you should think of, mm, Dovie’s like, opportunity, and obstacles and everything, like, this can be an opportunity if you want to say you have this trait, and I want to undermine this person in some way because my character also has a feeling about this guy. That’s also an opportunity. You don’t have to feel like it’s just to help me in this scene.
Janine: Mm… then she should definitely do something to fuck with this fucking MaGuddans guy.
[pause, all laugh]
Janine: Hm. How do you fuck with a MaGuddans guy?
Ali: I mean you can use one of your traits here, I’m fine with loosening those rules if you just also want to pull something that we know about the setting, or just make up a character. If you want to make up a fake name for a character that you know makes horrible clocks and you want to give him that name instead, you know, then that’s [laughs] also a version of this that works.
Janine: What are some other—no, that’s silly. Okay. I think—okay, yeah. I think then that the thing that Dovie does when she notices that Mellow is kind of like—I guess this would pull on her being attentive? Because she would notice that Mellow is annoyed and would kinda want to mitigate that annoyance by ending the encounter? I think the thing that she says is like—the thing you suggested, which is like—
Janine [as Dovie]: Oh, I actually know a clockmaker. They do repairs as well. They do all my clocks. Their name… is…
Janine: [pauses, laughs] Yeah, it’s the first thing I saw, so I’m just gonna go with it.
Janine [as Dovie]: Otto Candy?
Ali [laughs]: Good. Glad.
Jack [as Mr Click]: Oh, Mr Candy… yes, yes. I recognise the name. I recognise the name, quite the professional.
Jack: Uh, and now we just all roll?
Ali: So me and Janine have one more turn that we can make.
Jack: Oh damn, okay, yeah, right.
Ali: So, yeah either we suggest something for ourselves or suggest something for the other person. [sighs] I-I think my suggestion is that you can use your “good under pressure” trait to, like, very casually get this person out of your store, or even further, distract him by being like, oh you know, you can look at my clocks over here to like, get them away from us.
Janine: Yeah, I wonder if actually there is, like, one of those outdoor clocks. Like, it’s sort of attached to the shop, but it’s like an exterior facing thing for people on the street to use? I wonder if it’s one of those things that is, like, indirectly—it’s part of the building, so it’s not really really hers, but it’s her responsibility because it’s more attached to her shop than anyone else’s. So I wonder if she, she says like—
Janine [as Dovie]: Oh hey, there’s a ladder in the alley, you can get the ladder and take a look at the clock if you want to see Otto’s work.
Janine: I should clarify and say that clock is not Otto’s work, but this guy does not need to know that. [Ali laughs] He just needs to climb up a ladder and get the hell out of the shop.
Jack [as Mr Click]: Oh, I don’t do ladders.
Janine [as Dovie]: It’s a step ladder.
Jack [as Mr Click]: I don’t do them. I don’t do ladders. It’s something about the height.
Janine [as Dovie]: Okay, well. Maybe, can you—can you pay, just pay one of the—pay like Honest William or like Gentle… Buck. [Ali laughs in background] Or any of the, any of the odd job boys… [Janine and Jack laugh] They’ll get it for you.
Ali: [crosstalk] You’re doing great.
Jack [laughing, as Odd Job Boys]: Ooh, it’s us, the odd job boys!
Ali: Let me add “Odd Job Boys” to the setting list.
Jack [as Mr Click]: Ah yes, the Odd Job Boys… yes, well, I’ll keep it in mind.
Ali: Okay, now we’re gonna roll some dice to see who actually wins this scene, to see if you actually leave or not. So I’m gonna take care of my dice. Jack, you’ve got yours?
Jack: Mm-hmm!
Ali: Oh my god, you beat me! [laughs] And I was so—okay.
Janine: Oh boy.
Jack: Um, okay, so.
Ali: Give me one second, because I have to scroll up in this.
Jack: Oh god— [laughs] because we have to do another—a second—a second pool—
Ali: We don’t have to, it’s optional, I just want to explain it so we know that it’s an option, we don’t have to do it, I am fine deciding that this roll doesn’t exist. But it’s cool, so it’s fine, it’s fine, it’s fine. So. [deliberates, sings] if the opponent wins, no one receives any points towards their goal at this time. The active Suitor and the Beloved gain traits declared by the opponent. Whatever the outcome, keep the first pool of dice showing the results for the next phase. The active Suitor and the Beloved may choose to continue to try to overcome the hurdle by rolling more dice again during the second pool. Regardless of whether or not we do this, Jack, you still have to give us traits.
Jack: Okay.
Ali: Or at least, regardless of whether or not I do this, you give me a trait, but not Janine.
Jack: Okay.
Ali: Um… the second pool. [laughs] It’s gonna be fine. If the active player and the Beloved player lose after rolling their first pool, they get a second chance. They can earn their dice through narration involving their character element, but this also opens the door to suggestions by the opponent. Things get down ‘n’ dirty here. So, Jack—this is kind of, in a way to explain it, that we’re… we may, we get. Jack, what you’re essentially going to do is offer a devil’s bargain.
Jack: Mmmm.
Ali: Where you can say “Okay, you get a chance to win again, but you have to take this suggestion that I’m making that you don’t want to happen”. You would assign essentially a second bad trait to me.
Jack: Regardless of whether or not you take it?
Ali: Well, I can re— [laughs] If the active player rejects the opponent’s suggestion, they can still gain extra dice. However, the active players must create a complication for themselves.
Jack: Hm.
Ali: So… yeah. So because I lost, regardless, you are going to give me a trait. And then, if I—if I choose to take these extra four dice—I take four dice if I take your suggestion as to what my second trait should be, or I can think of one for myself, and then I only get three dice.
Jack: Okay.
Ali: So! [laughs]
Jack: Okay. So shall I start by giving you a trait?
Ali: Yeah. Let’s just make it easy so I can determine if I like “okay, I’ll take it”, that’s fine.
Jack: Okay. I think the first trait that I want to give is “headhunted”.
Ali: Okay… [typing] Perfect.
Janine: Interesting.
Ali: And do you have a suggestion for a second trait that you want to give me?
Jack: Oh, this is my devil’s bargain? Hmm.
Ali: Yeah. So you can say, I can either just walk away and be like, okay... so I think what it is is that you make the suggestion and I can say “no, I just want to lose, I’m good”; “no, I don’t want to do that but I have a suggestion of my own”; or just take your suggestion.
Jack: Okay. And if you win this second round, do you end up taking the one that I’m about to suggest?
Ali: Ah…. that’s a great question. [laughs] Hold on and I’m gonna find out the answer to it in a second… [laughs, reading] Roll the dice in the second pool, the active players roll these initial three or four dice for accepting the opponent’s suggestion or making the trait. So I do have to accept it, yes. But if I do end up winning… I think I still get the point? But I’ve taken these things, and then if I do end up winning, I also get to make my own positive trait.
Jack: Okay.
Ali: Because those happen no matter what.
Jack: Okay. Okay. Hmm.
Ali: We did it!
Jack: Sure. [Ali laughs] Ah, okay, so the other trait that I am going to… Hm… The other trait I am going to suggest is… [pause] Uh, furious.
Ali: Oh. [laugh] Is that… the response to the scene being interrupted, and knowing this person is…
Jack: Well it’s like you’ve met your crush, and then just this absolute weirdo comes in and is like “come fix all my clocks” and you’re like [Ali laughs] oh god—okay?
Ali: [laughing] And not only that, but they were like come fix my clocks, and also take this person you’re talking to outside so she can go show you her fake clock or whatever.
Jack: Yeah.
Ali: Um… hm… I’m trying to think if I have… [sighs] I guess I don’t have a thing but that makes sense? So I might as well try to… roll it so I can maybe choose something for myself that’s good and also gain control over this scene again, essentially.
Jack: Yeah, yeah.
Ali: So I am going to take four dice… And what I’m doing is just adding these dice—we’re not rerolling things, I’m just adding these, if I have—oh, I’m super not gonna get this, if I have two 6s on these four dice then I will be good, and I will have beaten you. But I just realised that’s probably not gonna happen, so we’re fine… Okay, wait—
Janine: It’s fine.
Ali: No, okay, wait. So, we each have one 6, and then we decide—then we see how many 5s that we have, because there’s no ties. And I have three 5s and you have 1.
Jack: Yeah! Yeah!
Janine: There you go!
[Ali laughs]
Jack: Hey!
Ali: I’m taking control of my destiny once more. And that’s how this system works, and that makes sense, now that, okay, great. [laughs] Perfect, okay. So I’m going to take—okay, I’m just going to finish narrating this scene, which is, um. I am, like, so annoyed by this. And I see you, like, go outside, and, like, you know, [laughs] I see you argue with this person who’s pointing up at the clock and pointing at the ladder [Jack laughs] and I see you just being like, just go find one of the Odd Job Boys! And the guy putting his hands on his hips. And when you, [laughs] when Dovie comes back into the shop, I’m like—I’m definitely, like, really annoyed, but I’m like [takes breath]
Ali [as Mellow]: That’s—that’s definitely the most impressive way I’ve seen to kick someone out.
Janine [as Dovie]: You know, normally I have Sniffly Daniel in here to do that kind of thing, but he’s got the day off, so I—you know, you make do.
Ali [as Mellow]: Hire someone to get rid of annoying customers? That is the exchange for the seltzer tip.
Janine [as Dovie]: Well, you know, again—Sniffly Daniel, it’s just his day off.
Ali [as Mellow, laughing]: Ah, fair, fair. I—I—I, um.
Janine [as Dovie]: He’s sick.
Ali [as Mellow]: I’m sorry, I—I—I just have to go cool down. I’m just gonna take a walk. Ah, clocks, clocks! I’m not a clockmaker, do I look like a clockmaker to you?
Janine [as Dovie]: Uh—no?
Ali [as Mellow]: It’s ridiculous that he would come in here and ask me if I wanted to make clocks?! What is that?
Janine [as Dovie]: I mean, clocks are neat? Um… No, you’re right. You’re right to be upset.
Ali: [laughing] Okay. I think that ends scene.
Janine: I think Dovie, like, takes the pocket watch in her chatelaine and tucks it into an actual pocket so it’s not just hanging there, like, [muttering] Mellow doesn’t like clocks, okay. [Ali laughs]
Ali: That’s fine—you know, I— that’s great. You’ve seen me angry in the first time that you’ve ever met me, so that’s not great. But also that was like a fucked up thing! Okay, perfect. So now, we still won, so I get a point, you get a point. And then…
Janine: Do we both still take traits? Or did you already take your trait?
Ali: Yeah. No, I now make a trait for myself that I like and want to have.
Janine: Okay.
Ali: Which I believe is why this system is balanced this way, and if it isn’t, I’ve [laughing] made up my own hack for Shooting the Moon [Jack laughs]. But—no, this is the right way, and I—it does make sense, because it’s worth it to trade the extra, like, wound essentially to take control of the scene.
Janine: Yeah.
Ali: So…
Janine: Uh, I went with “relieved” with my trait. Because Dovie is relieved that Mellow didn’t immediately just ditch her for the department store. [Ali laughs]. Even though she had no businss to be like “Hey, could you not take that job?” It’s just a relief that it worked out.
Ali: Yeah. I’m going to write… what is the word that I want, because I can’t spell it… gaining… note-ary? That’s what I have— [laugh] I’m just going to write “getting attention from town”... is that the same as headhunted? That’s not the same. Because headhunted is someone wants me for this job, but like, making a name for yourself is a different thing.
Jack: Right.
Ali: How do you pronounce… note-ar-y? But that’s a person who like—
Janine: [crosstalk] Notary. A notary is like, a person who like— [trails off]
Jack: [crosstalk] Notoriety?
Ali: Ah, notoriety!
Janine: Hm, there you go.
[Ali laughs]
Jack: It’s close to notary.
Janine: I don’t think you need to take a—I don’t think you need a certificate for that one.
Ali: [laughs] Right. Uh-huh! But it’s basically like, you know—it’s good that my name is. around town. [Jack and Janine agree] People know me as a good inventor.
Janine: Yeah.
Ali: They’re going to forget the horrible dog face and start remembering me for the genius I am! [laughs]
Ali: Okay, now we are up to the Beloved turn. And Janine, give me a second for me to tell you what you’re doing.
Janine: Please. By all means, yes.
Ali: So in this turn you become the opponent for both of us.
Janine: Ooh.
Ali: You create a hurdle for both of us at once, and we in that case have to defend ourselves against you. We each get separate dice pools, and we have different ways to pick that up. But at the beginning of the turn, the Beloved player creates the hurdle, a challenging situation for both suitors. In doing so, you set the level for the hurdle. So the way that the levels work is that you can have… [pauses, sighs]
Level One is the suitors—we just face like a normal challenge. You have five dice, and you gain one point if you win. Level Two is the suitors are threatened, and then you get seven dice and you get two points. And Level Three is all of us are threatened in some way, you get nine dice and you also get three points. So it’s very game-y, risk-reward here.
Janine: Okay.
Ali: Like, if you put yourself under the knife, you can really get closer to being on that top ten list. [laughs] And then because we’re toymakers, we can kind of cut the line between threatened and challenged.
Janine: Do I lose points if I lose stuff? Or is it only a game?
Ali: Um, let me—I don’t think you ever lose points—I just scrolled way down on this pdf. [laughs]
Janine: And also, does it need to be a hurdle that affects both of you, or is it a separate hurdle for each of you?
Ali: Uh, you’re making a hurdle that affects both of us.
Janine: Okay.
Ali: So there is something in the rules that’s like if you want people to roll separately, you can, and if you want to like make two different hurdles for us you can absolutely do that if the rules say that you can, I don’t care.
Janine: I think I have a good catch-all for this. [Ali laughs]
Ali: I’m just going to get back to the page that I was on to just make sure there’s not anything else big that I’m not explaining to you. I don’t think that there is.
Jack: Who frames this scene?
Ali: Janine does. [crosstalk] Janine’s making the hurdle.
Jack: [crosstalk] Okay. And then introduces the hurdle.
Ali: Yeah. Level Three, we all face danger, yadda yadda yadda. Okay, so Level One must present some challenge to the suitors. In Level Two, suitors face some danger, personal, professional, emotional, et cetera. So. And then Level Three is all of us? And then… So after that, me and you, Jack, we each get three responses each. And I am just gonna give you this big—
Jack: Oh, it’s like a menu, innit?
Ali: It’s also a menu. There’s like, a smaller version of the menu on our thing, but I’m gonna give you the full size one right now and I’m just going to read it for the audience, which is:
We get two dice if we involvee the trait of our own character or the Beloved.
We get three dice if we… um, use our own trait and then also add a complicating dice? A complicating trait. So like I would’ve taken headhunted or whatever if Janine hadn’t made that scene for me, and I would’ve gotten an extra dice to do that.
You also get three dice if you suggest something for another player. Like, another complication, that is.
And then you also get three dice if you flirt with the Beloved. [laughs, Jack laughs]
You get four dice if you… um. Oh, that’s conflict, we don’t have conflict.
You also get four dice if you… something goes wrong for the active player and the complicating trait that they gain… [pause] Oh! So I would get four dice if I was like, hey, Jack, you tell me what my complication is. [Jack confirms] Um… I can still reject that if you make that complication, but I can get four dice if you say something and I say that want to do it.
And then we get five dice if you wanna say, hey, I’m getting rid of this trait or attribute completely and I’m gonna replace it with something that substantially changes my character.
So that’s how we are. And we get to choose three of those each time.
Jack: So we’re gonna throw like, a million dice right?
Ali: A bunch. I don’t know that if I’ve put enough dice here, I think that I have.
Janine: I do not think there are.
[all laugh]
Janine: Unless we each take turns. Then it would be fine.
Ali: We can do that. Let me just, I’m just going to double-check what the results of this are. [deliberates] Resolving the Beloved’s turn. After three responses, each—… [deliberates, pauses] Once the winner has been determined, that player gains points and adds traits to all of the characters. Oh, so I guess we get—so depending on the level, we each get points totals either way, it’s not just you. Um… because it doesn’t seem like… Yeah, that’s fine. Okay, perfect. Cool.
Jack: Okay.
Janine: So I’ve got nine dice here.
Ali: [laughs] Okay.
Jack: Oh, God.
Janine: Because I am going to threaten Suitors and Beloved.
Ali: Oh. Playing out the game.
Janine: Because my idea that I had—there was no reason I could think of that it would only affect—like there was no fun reason why it would only affect the Suitors and not the Beloved, since they’re all in the same business.
There has been a terrible accident at the velvet factory.
Jack: Oh no. Not the velvet!
Janine: [laughs] It’s not so much that the accident has caused a shortage of velvet. [Jack laughs] There was still a lot of velvet made, and it wasn’t destroyed, per se. But it was cursed, and it’s cursed in such a way where people know it was cursed, but they don’t know what the curse actually is? [Jack laughs] So, most people who use velvet for certain sensitive kinds of work, like making things for children, are not going to be using velvet for a little while.
Jack: It’s like a product recall, but because of a curse.
Janine: Yes. [Ali laughs]
Jack: Okay!
Janine: It’s just like, okay, you have to use cotton and corduroy, and a bunch of garbage fabric. It’s Christmas time and nobody is getting a velveteen rabbit.
Ali: Oh my god.
Jack: And this is a scene with… both Mellow and Carroway in? Like, do we frame a scene with us two in or are we sort of like independently reacting to this on our own?
Ali: It’s tough because… we can do that? Um…
Janine: It kind of makes sense to have this be like, news that arrives, like—
Ali: Yeah, right, we—
Janine: If everyone was gathered together and heard about it, then they wouldn’t be in a position to do anything at that moment? So the thing that makes more sense is how do people deal with the news after the fact?
Ali: Right, we can make these all one scene, all of us together, or—like, we can—as we do these responses, I think what we can do is setting up the scene depending on if we wanna be like, oh, I’m also in this scene, and this is how I take this hurdle or whatever else.
Jack: Yeah, yeah yeah.
Ali: Because one of the ways we gain dice is through flirting with, [Ali laughs, cat cries in the background] Dovie, so there would have to be a situation that we’re describing where we’re in a room with Dovie. I think the reason it’s not specific is so that we have those options, like if you wanna describe a scene where you’re doing a thing and I said “I wanna deal with the velvet my own way” I have that option.
Jack: Right, yeah.
Janine: Mm-hm.
Jack: I just want to make sure we have an opportunity to get both of us on screen at the same time in the same place.
Ali: Oh yeah, for sure!
Janine: Yeah!
Ali: You go first response, unless, Janine, you want to say this is the scene right now, Jack, you can… set up a scene right now, and then I can either add to it or decide on a different one.
Jack: Hmm. Okay. [pause]
Ali: [mutters] I can do that right now…
[long pause in the audio, there are mouse clicks heard]
Jack: This is tricky. Uhh, let me think. [pause] Oh man, we have a lot of dice. [Ali laughs] Well…
Ali: [laughs] I’m just making as many as I can because we’re gonna need a bunch for this!
Janine: If we want with all—if we want a premise for all three characters to both be after the news, like in the stage of things where they could be planning, but also in the same scene together, I wonder if there’s something to like maybe… like, Dovie and Carroway being in the Glacier Express and they’re sitting in a window seat or something, and Mellow sees them and is like “Oh my god, this velvet thing!
Jack: Oh, yeah, yeah yeah.
Ali: Yeah, or just like a general, like—it could be like a general sort of shopkeeper’s meeting. Like with seamstresses and furniture makers, and like… [trails off]
Jack [interrupts, as a meeting leader]: I have some terrible news.
Ali: [laughs] And we’re up in arms. Yeah.
Jack [as meeting leader]: Friends, I have terrible news—settle down, settle down.
Janine [as crowd]: [muttering] Rabble, rabble, rabble, rabble.
Jack [as meeting leader]: I know the snow has been falling heavily, and I’m afraid I have some bad news from the, um, Marchmont Velvet Mill.
[Janine laughs, Jack laughs]
Janine [as crowd]: Marchmont…
Jack [as meeting leader]: Sorry, from the Marchmont Velvet Press.
Janine [as crowd]: Velvet Press…
Jack [as meeting leader]: Well, you know the witch who lives up round those parts? [Jack laughs]
Janine: The witch of Velvet Men.
Jack [as meeting leader]: I think they—I think they, they must have angered her somehow, because all the velvet’s cursed, and—
Janine [as crowd]: Rabble, rabble, rabble, rabble.
[Ali laughs]
Jack [as meeting leader]: Cursed, I say! Cursed—settle down, settle down. Now, I know, I know that some of you may not be so worried, ‘cause obviously MaDuggans has its own separate velvet supplier, and curse protection! But I’m afraid that I have to tell you that, per the Curse Accords of 1648 we will be unable to work with the velvet for the very near future—meeting adjourned! [slams hand on desk]
[beat]
Ali [as Mellow]: [gasps] What are we gonna do? [gasps again]
[Jack laughs]
Janine [as crowd]: Rabble, rabble, rabble, rabble
[Ali laughs]
Ali: I’m just—imagining like the Phoenix attorney[3], like, audience. All right, it’s time to… it’s time to involve some of these traits. So, Jack, definitely you go first.
Jack: Okay.
Jack [as Carroway]: This is—this is—this is a problem, right, Dovie?
Janine [as Dovie]: This is a very big problem, this is a huge problem! This is… velvet’s so soft!
Jack [as Carroway]: I—! Yeah. Yeah, velvet is so soft. Surely we—
Ali: [interrupts] This—oh, sorry.
Jack: Oh, no, no—go ahead.
[Ali laughs]
Ali [as Mellow]: This is really the velvet season. If it was summertime, and we were using silk instead, you know, it would be something, but…
Janine [as Dovie]: In every industry too! Everybody wants velvet cloaks, and they want velvet animals for their kids, and they want velvet booties for their babies. Everyone wants velvet, velvet, velvet; if we have no velvet…
Jack [as Carroway]: Sorry, I don’t think we’ve met? Dovie, could you introduce us?
Janine [as Dovie]: Oh, of course! This is Mellow Aster. She’s the one who does the waggy-tail dogs.
Jack [as Carroway]: [takes a breath] Oh!
Ali [as Mellow]: Nice to meet you.
Janine [as Dovie]: And Mellow, this is Carroway Sticklepath. She does those really amazing—the cats with the really amazing faces. You both do other things too, I’m just—these are just the [snaps fingers] you know, bullet points.
[Ali laughs]
Jack [as Carroway]: Well, it’s… well, it’s nice to meet you! I’m sorry that we have to meet, you know, during a velvet crisis meeting.
Ali [as Mellow]: Yeah, you know, I’ve seen those cats, they’re incredible. It’s nice to meet you.
Jack [as Carroway]: Thank you, I like your dogs’ tails!
Ali [as Mellow]: Thank you.
Ali: [laughing] I’m furious, so I think that I give a very terse smile, because I know that that is a backhanded compliment, [crosstalk] because you should just like the dogs. The paws and the whole…
Jack: [crosstalk] Just such a backhanded compliment. The tails are really good.
Janine: It’s a back-ended compliment, even.
Jack: [mid-cough] A what?
Janine: A back-ended compliment? [Jack laughs] It’s fine, we can move on— [breaks off laughing]
Jack: Oh my god.
Ali: No, it’s good, it’s a great joke. It’s a great joke. Um… [laughs]
Jack: Okay, so… hmm. Oh, I’ve got an idea.
Ali: Okay.
Jack [as Carroway]: Dovie, don’t you have that stockpile of velvet, back when the last time this happened? I thought I saw it in the back—Dovie’s been kind enough to take me into the backroom, and show me round the backstage of Penny Many-Things. It’s really, it’s spectacular back there. And I couldn’t help but notice that she had this, like, like a little collection of velvet. And I’m sure that maybe we could—maybe it’s too much for me to suggest, but maybe we could, you know, offer some of that velvet out to other customers who might need it? I’m sure Mellow could use some. And I know that there’s that woman in the market who makes the booties, and I’m sure she could use some too.
Janine [as Dovie]: That’s true.
Ali [as Mellow]: I—I wouldn’t want to take any of your velvet for your precious items, but I—
Jack [as Carroway]: No, no, of course not. No, of course not.
Ali [as Mellow]: We’re all—we’re all in hot water here.
Jack [as Carroway]: Mm-hm.
Janine [as Dovie]: Well, I can… I don’t know there’s—you know, there’s not enough to give to the upholsterers, and to the clothiers, and it’s really just enough to make a few hundred, uh, dogs and bears and things like that. But… you know, I think—I think we could distribute it at least among the toymakers a little bit.
Ali [as Mellow]: [sighs] You know, the situation—… I was cursed as a child.
Jack [as Carroway]: Oh, my goodness!
Janine: Woah! [Ali laughs]
Jack [as Carroway]: My aunt was cursed as a child!
Ali [as Mellow]: Yeah, you know, it’s—
Jack [as Carroway]: Did you—did you live in the Marchmont Mountains?
Ali [as Mellow]: I—you know, I travelled there as a kid, I would spend summers there. So.
Jack [as Carroway]: Oh, I’ve always wanted to go, but it’s a shame about the curses.
Ali [as Mellow]: Right, yeah, you know, curses, they—you know, people talk a big game about curses, but it’s very livable. You know, I think if we—
Janine [as Dovie]: Are you curse-immune now? Is that how that works?
Ali [as Mellow]: Well, it depends on the curse.
Janine [as Dovie]: You know, I used to hear my mother, my mother would talk about if one of the kids in the neighborhood ever got cursed, that she’d send me over to their house so I could get cursed too, and then get it out of my system when I was really young.
Jack [as Carroway]: No, that doesn’t work.
Janine [as Dovie]: And like flexible. No, it doesn’t?
Jack [as Carroway]: No, no, I’ve heard that. No, that doesn’t work.
Ali [as Mellow]: Ohhh. Well, I, you know, I, um. The 15th of every night and the first blue moon of the year I have to drink rose oil. But otherwise, you know, I’m just living my life… fine.
Jack [as Carroway]: What—
Ali [as Mellow]: And you know—oh—
Jack [as Carroway]: What happens if you don’t? I’m sorry, maybe this is too much. I—you don’t have to say.
Ali [as Mellow]: It’s personal, it’s very personal.
Jack [as Carroway]: Oh, I’m sorry.
Ali [as Mellow]: But it’s not as bad as you’d think it would be. Anyway, what I’m getting to here is that, like, we could just… I’m not saying we should give people cursed products, obviously, but I just think that if we were able to find a little bit more about what this curse is, and be able to have that information to pass to our customers… It would be as much of a scandal, right? We could, you know, it’s information we should have as shop owners and inventors, in my opinion.
Janine [as Dovie]: Mm.
[pause, cat meows in background]
Ali: I’ve given myself three dice for adding “cursed” to my traits. [laughs]
Jack: Damn, that’s incredible. I’ve given myself two dice for appealing to the Beloved’s generosity.
Ali: Mm-hm.
Jack: I do need to give myself two dice.
Ali: Oh, I did it. You’re good, you’re good.
Jack: Oh! Thanks.
Ali: Yeah. So we’re each one hurdle down, so now you can create a new…
Jack: Oh, a new suggestion?
Ali: Mm-hm.
Jack: Okay, ah.
Jack [as Carroway]: Say, Mellow?
Ali [as Mellow]: Mm-hm?
Jack [as Carroway]: You’ve, uh, you’ve met the Odd Job Boys, right?
Ali [as Mellow]: Oh my god, who hasn’t? They’re just, you know, around town and…
Jack [as Carroway]: Do you know Loyal?
Ali [as Mellow]: Loyal? Mm—I, mm—is that the one with the flat cap?
Jack [as Carroway]: Ah, he’s got like a—he’s got like a—
Jack: [laughs] I’m just looking at the art.
Jack [as Carroway]: Yes! It is!
Ali: Oh. I didn’t remember… [laughing]
Jack [as Carroway]: It is the one with the flat cap, yes! He wears this—I got that cap for him, actually, a couple of years ago. I’m glad that you remembered it.
Ali [as Mellow]: Oh, you bought him that hat? That’s—oh, my goodness. It’s a great hat.
Jack [as Carroway]: Duncan—thanks. Well, I mean, you know—it’s his hat. What was I saying? I was thinking about his hat, and then I was thinking about… Okay, so. Duncan—I mean Loyal. You know, he has connections with the Odd Job Boys. And I’m sure the Odd Job Boys could find, you know, if not more velvet, maybe they could find a counter-witch? I don’t know.
Ali [as Mellow]: Ohhh.
Janine [as Dovie]: Oh yeah! Oh, what’s his name… I think they have—ah. [snaps fingers] What’s his—it’s on the tip of my tongue.
Jack [as Carroway]: Do they have a counter-witch on staff?
Jack: On staff. [Jack laughs, Ali laughs]
Ali: Let’s pause, ‘cause I love the idea of the Odd Job Boys being an actual company [Jack is laughing throughout] and not just a group of weird kids. And for them to have, like, you know how malls have Auntie Anne’s like, pretzel stands? And it’s just a front-facing, like, here’s a counter with some pretzels. Or how they have cupcake dispensers, it’s as if it was a hole in the wall? But it’s like, there should be a store there, but instead it’s a desk, and it says Odd Job Boys. And there’s an awning, and there’s a kid there, and they’ll assign you a kid to do a thing that they need to do.
Jack: So good!
Ali: The gig economy, it’s just magical.
Jack: It’s so good! But—and there’s like, snow falling, and they’ve got like, these little lanterns, and they’re like running around… trying to find a fuckin’ witch.
[pause, Ali laughs]
Jack [as Carroway]: Yeah, no, what was his name?
Janine [as Dovie]: I think it’s Hexed Linus? Hexer Linus? Hexed Linus.
Jack [as Carroway]: Hex’t Linus?
Janine [as Dovie]: I’m not—it’s one of those. I don’t don’t see him around very often.
Jack [as Carroway]: H-E-X-apostrophe-T? No.
Janine [as Dovie]: M-maybe?
Jack [as Carroway]: [crosstalk] Well, I’m sure Duncan—
Janine [as Dovie]: [crosstalk] I’ve never seen it written down.
Jack [as Carroway]: I’m sure that Duncan might, you know, might—you know, be able to go and fetch him, perhaps? Or find a large amount of velvet? I don’t know!
Jack: So I’m giving myself two dice for evoking the Odd Job Boys.
Ali: Okay.
[pause as Jack coughs in the background]
Jack: Sorry I’m coughing.
Ali: No, no, no. You’re fine. Did you wanna take a break after this?
Jack: I think once we’ve finished a round, yeah, just take a little break.
Ali: Okay, cool.
Ali: Um, I… [long pause] It is too soon to be crossing anything off. I’m going to… [pause, sudden laughter] Put in my—
Janine: I don’t know that it’s too soon to cross things off. I think you could do it if you wanted to.
Jack: Because we can give ourselves more. [laughs]
Ali: [laughing] A friend of mine just texted me with the… extremely timely, uh, suggestion that “Jim and Pam is driving me nuts”, because she is currently watching The Office, [Jack laughs] and I have to clothesline, um… That’s so funny. I… Oh, okay, I’m gonna… [pause]
Ali [as Mellow]: Yeah, you know the Odd Job Boys, yeah, you know… I think that’s a really good idea, I think that you should go out with them and try to find that counter-witch.
Ali: And I am going to, I am creating a complication for you, Jack, which is “busy”. [laughs] Because you are going to be researching this counter-witch.
Jack: Oh, wow. Janine, do you approve of that?
Janine: Yeah!
[pause]
Jack: Hmmmmm…
Janine: That makes sense. Odd Job Boys are not easy—that’s the thing, Odd Job Boys, they don’t have a stand at the mall, they’re all over the place. It’s like trying to—they’re like feral kit—they’re not like feral cats, that’s mean. [Jack laughs] But you know, they’re just like—they’re just all over the place, and you can only find them when you aren’t specifically looking for one, and then they just are all over the place when you’re specifically looking for them, and it’s like, I can’t find any cats anywhere in this neighbourhood, it sucks!
[Jack, Ali laugh]
Jack: For my cat hunt! Um… okay, Ali, I would like you to suggest for me… “Something goes wrong for the active character or a complicating the traits they gain”.
Ali: Okay! Um…
Jack: Oh, and you should also write down my new trait, which is like, busy.
Ali: Yes. [pause, typing] “Busy finding counter-witch”. [stops typing] Oh, what other complication am I gonna give you? Um… something that goes wrong for the active player and complicating—and a new trait. Suitors—mmm. Hmm. [sighs, cat meows in background] Mm. Oh, I—
Ali [as Mellow]: You know. I… This is rude to bring up here, but we are all business owners, and it is what it is. I think that the fees that counter-witches charge are very premium. Especially at this time of year—people are asking for things to be blessed and for holiday spells. Are you sure that you’re gonna be able to… to get this together?
Jack [as Carroway]: Oh! Uh—
Jack: And Carroway, like, glances at Dovie.
Ali: [laughing] I don’t have a suggestion, I think I’m like… Am I suggesting you would have to pay for this witch? [laughs] That’s so weird! I don’t know— [Janine laughs] Mm. I just keep going back to this witch, um. But yeah, I think— [gets cut off]
Janine: I mean, at least she would have to front the cash, right? Like you don’t get an Odd Job Boy on an I.O.U.
Ali: Yeah. I’m writing—
Jack: Right.
Janine: You front some cash, and then the Velvet User’s Association or whatever the hell pays you back—
Jack: [laughing] Holiday premium!
Janine: Still gotta get that, uh, Odd Job Boys deposit down.
Jack: And, like, you know—
Janine: And they do credit checks.
Jack: All the colour like, drains from Carroway’s face, because she knows that—that she has not been able to sell enough uneven cats necessarily to cover the cost of a witch, and she’s just like—
Jack [as Carroway]: Oh. Right. Well, yes, well. Yes, of course. I mean, I’ll have to consider it.
Jack: And I’m going to take four dice.
Ali: [laughing] Okay. Okay, so this is my last opportunity to get dice for myself. [pause, cat repeatedly crying in background] And I think that I am going to…
Janine: Sounds like an Odd Job Boy back there. [laughs]
Jack: Yeah. There’s an Odd Job Boy—one of the Odd Job Boys has arrived. [Ali is laughing throughout]
Ali: I think that I am going to… I’m gonna pull my observant trait here, and… what’s the next thing I’m going to bring into this scene, I’m really into this counter-witch idea.
[Jack laughs]
Ali: I think the way that I—especially to appeal myself in front of Dovie, in being like—
Ali [as Mellow]: You know, I—the one thing that they didn’t mention is, what type of velvet is being cursed? Is it everything? Is it the entire supply line? Or is it, you know, quarter inch thick? Is it, you know… matte…
[Ali laughs]
Ali: Matte? Is it—is it…
Janine: Matt Velvet is also an amazing character name that we need to use at some point.
[all laugh]
Ali: Please, write all of these down.
Jack: God, Matt Velvet, so good.
Janine: Very Bluff.
Ali [as Mellow]: You know, ‘cause I… there’s so many dogs that you can make with matte velvet if it’s not… if that’s not cursed.
Ali: And I think she’s just kind of going through the line, like, pulling, oh, there are these—I know about velvet, and I could speak to it in this conversation to figure out if there’s a way around this that we can make other toys, right? Use a fabric in a different thickness. And that was… two, right? That was two? [pause, typing] Okay, so I get two more and then we are gonna roll to see what the results are, and then we’re gonna check to see [laughing] what we do.
Janine: Oh boy.
Jack: We’re, like, what this is now? [laughs] Okay.
Janine: All right, random side! Roll ‘em up.
Ali: [singing] Random side! [crosstalk] You got one 6—
Janine: Alright. [crosstalk] I got one 6, so all you have to do is—all anyone has to do is beat one 6, right?
Jack: [gasps]
Ali: Oh my god, we’re all tied with one 6.
Janine: Wow!
Ali: [continuing] Which means we have to go to 5s…
Janine: I have one 5 also.
Ali: I have two 5s.
Jack: I have two 5s.
Ali: Ohhh. Um…
Jack: Then do we go down to 4s? [laughs]
Ali: I think we go back to 4s. I’m just double checking that me and you can’t tie. [pause] Look for the highest— [cut off]
Janine: [interrupting] It feels like maybe—wouldn’t it make—I don’t know, sorry, you go.
Ali: [reading from book, muttering quickly] Look for the highest die, whatever… If two or more players use the same… Okay, so we go down to 4.
Janine: Okay, that’s Jack, then.
Ali: So Jack wins, okay, perfect.
Jack: Wait, doesn’t it say—in the ‘Playing the Game’ bit it says if tie, Beloved gives traits then reroll winning dice? I don’t… understand that. [Ali laughs] We can just… I’m just happy to win, honestly. [laughs]
Janine: [crosstalking quietly] One of the players gives trait to both… three players…
Jack: [crosstalk] I’m not gonna—I’m not gonna talk myself out of victory.
Ali: [laughing] After the three responses: Each player will pile the dice in front of them, forming a personal—bah bah bah…
Janine: Oh, that’s only for Suitor turns, so that’s like a thing we haven’t done.
Ali: Oh, okay, yeah, yeah. So… [reading from book] If two or more players have rolled the same value, use the same process as the Suitor turns: compare the next die until the winner is determined. All ties are broken in Beloved turns, players cannot tie. Once the winner has been determined, that player gains points and adds traits to all of the characters.
Jack: Oh, damn!
Ali: Number of points gained is number to… number of points gained is equal to the reward for the level, fill in this many circles in the characters’ goal sheets.
Jack: Is that three?
Ali: It was like… was it three? I thought it was like, a bunch.
Jack: It’s like level one, level two, and level three, right?
Ali: Oh yes, yeah, okay. It’s three points with nine dice, okay. [reading] Base the traits added on the events of play. They may reflect the hurdle or some action taken by the character, and some facet of their ch—personality that was highlighted. If appropriate, the same trait might be applied to all three characters. [stops reading] So, we’re all dealing with this velvet thing, if you wanted to just say the trait that we all gain is “low on velvet” [Jack laughs] you could do that but you can also, kind of zoom in more there, because you’ve kinda taken control of the scene, essentially.
Jack: Okay. So the tra—the trait, I nearly said treat? [Ali laughs] The trait that Janine gets is “short on components”. The lend players—lend players? The lend customers, you know, spare velvet plan, worked well, but, uh… Dovie is generous? And occasionally people would come in and would be like ‘I need a little bit of velvet, and I need, like, a spring’ and so Dovie would be like, okay, here’s a bit of spring or whatever.
Janine: Yeah.
Jack: So you don’t—it’s not like you’re scarce? But you are essentially acting as a, sort of semi-warehouse for other manufacturers. Not just toy manufacturers, but other manufacturers nearby. Nobody wants to go to MaDuggans.
[Janine and Ali laugh]
Jack: Mellow. You are going to gain the trait… hmm… Hmm, you are going to gain the trait… “guilty”. [Ali gasps] Because you… suggested, first you suggested that Carroway should just kind of, go and find a counter-witch, [laughing] rather than being like, “I’ll go and find a counter-witch”. And then you were like “You can pay for it, right?” and noticed visibly that she couldn’t. [Janine laughing] And rather than saying “I’ll help with the counter-witch”, you were just kind of like “Well… okay. Time for me to go get a Brandy Alexander at the Landslide”.
Ali: I’m furious and observant! And…
Jack: That is true!
Ali: You walked up to me at a party and was like, hey, I’ve been in your crush’s back room, and I love your dog butts. [Jack laughs]
Jack [as meeting leader]: Please, this is not a party.
[Ali, Janine laugh]
Jack [as meeting leader]: This is an important velvet meeting, that I, the mayor, have called.
[Ali, Jack laughing]
Jack [as mayor]: In the town hall.
Jack: So you’re like—I don’t know if you’re—this isn’t, it’s so weird, coming to this game, coming after playing Dungeon World where like if you got a tag of “guilty” in Dungeon World, my character would be like, wracked with guilt. [Ali laughing] But I think it’s more just like you’re like, getting dressed in the morning and you’re like, damn, I just sent her off to hunt a witch. [Ali, Jack laugh] That was kinda shitty. [pause, Ali is still laughing] And I am going to gain the trait… “determined”. [laughs]
Ali: Ohhh. Sure.
Jack: Because I’m like… I’m gonna get that cash, I’m gonna find that—sorry, I’ve been saying witch, and that’s not right. This is a counter-witch. And that’s a very different thing.
Ali: Mmm.
Jack: I’m gonna gain the trait “determined”. [pause] Is that round one?
Ali: That’s round one! That’s the whole thing.
Jack: [laughs] Look at this like, little family of dice we have here.
[Ali laughs]
Janine: That was—wait, wasn’t that the first turn of round two?
Jack: No, that was the last turn of round one.
Ali: Yeah, it goes Suitor One, Suitor Two, Beloved, and it just keeps going round like that, yeah.
Janine: Oh, okay. Sorry, sorry.
Ali: You’re technically the last turn, yeah.
Janine: All right!
Ali: We have a couple of options here… we’ve been doing this since 6:30, and it’s 10 o’clock, so we could take a break here, if anyone would like. There’s also an option to make this game shorter if you want, and instead of doing… three rounds we can do two, and just do one more round and then wrap this up.
Jack: I love this world, and I don’t wanna say goodbye to it that fast. [laughs] Like, in the last turn, the idea of like, a series of cursed mountains? [Ali laughs] arrived, the Odd Job Boys became an entire organisation, and we went off to look for a counter-witch… Like, I don’t wanna rob ourselves, like, another turn.
Ali: [laughs] Okay. Fair.
Jack: If y’all are fine with it.
Ali: I think we also have a pretty good understanding of this game at this point, that if in like a couple of weeks we wanted to jump back into it, we could easily do that.
Jack: Yeah. 100%. I super agree.
Ali: Yeah.
Jack: So, do you think we should call it—take a break as in call it tonight, at this point? Or… I’m trying to think, because it’s like, ten to three now.
Ali: Yeah, I’m mostly asking you as someone who is sick and experiencing 3 AM [laughs]. I could probably do one more round tonight, but I think we’re gonna get like, a clear—it’s going to be an even split if we have this last scene, set it up as the hunt for the counter-witch, and then come back ready to go.
Jack: Yeah. I feel—I feel like I really wanna do this justice? And while I feel like I could do another round now, I don’t know that I could in like twenty minutes or something? So part of me’s like, we know where we are in this story, we’ve set up that we’re gonna hunt a counter-witch. [Ali, Jack laughs] ‘Hunt’ is a very violent term here, I don’t—
Janine: Yeah, I was gonna say, I don’t know that hunting is… what we’re on.
Jack: Fine! Fine, spy. We’re gonna spy a counter-witch. And then… also, this is a live, right? So we’ll just be able to listen through to the episode to recap anything we need to.
Ali: Yeah, yeah.
Jack: As well. So if you two are okay with it, like, I would love to keep playing, but I’m worried that I would not be able to do this place justice.
Ali: Yeah, by all means.
Janine: Yeah, and also, you know… we did, like, the character creation and stuff today, that’s always going to take up a disproportionate amount of time compared to the actual game.
Ali: Yeah.
Jack: Yeah, absolutely.
Janine: I think it makes sense to come back and do the last two turns and that would be an even, kind of, split.
Jack: Yeah, totally.
Ali: To do them justice.
Jack: ‘Cause if we did another turn now, then we’d have this weird sort of smaller thing. I’m happy to do it this way. I’m happy to do it this way.
Ali: Okay, perfect. Yeah, we’ve been doing this for like, three and a half hours, which is the exact length or much shorter than a Friends at the Table episode should be. [Jack laughs] Um, so… [laughs] On that note, this has been Live at the Table. We have been playing…
Janine: We didn’t do a clap.
Ali: Oh, we didn’t. [laughs]
Jack: If we do one at the end, does it still work for you, Ali? Can you just line the…
Ali: [laughing] It does still work for me.
Jack: It’s just…
Ali: Here’s—here’s a secret about claps is that I usually use the last one, so…
Jack: Ohh!
Janine: Damn!
Jack: Oh, damn, okay!
Janine: You just make us do two so you have more Clapcast material, I see how it is.
Jack: Ohhh. I hadn’t thought of that, that’s good.
Janine: Clever. [laughing]
Ali: [laughing] I need to know where the first one is so I can like, just be like—okay, everything before this I’m just gonna chop off, put in my Clapcast folder. And then the second one is like, it’s easier to just scroll to the end of a file, and be like this is where the files match up, and I’ll just mix it from there. So, an editing trick from me to you.
Jack: Oh! I’ve just had a great idea as well.
Ali: Oh?
Jack: If we stop here and come back soon, I can have some music for the last two parts of this game.
Ali: [gasps, laughs]
Janine: Oooh.
Ali: Okay! [laughs] Sure.
Janine: Nice.
Jack: Okay. Alright, should we do outros and then clap? What order do we do this in?
Ali: [laughing] We do do outros first. So this has been Shooting the Moon by Emily somebody—Emily Care-Boss. This was found in the Romance trilogy, it’s the second of those games. It’s a great game, I just bought it online, I have the PDF, it’s super good, go find it. The other thing that I want to mention about these systems specifically is that, like, there’s also a ton of really good hacks for these systems themselves in the book.
Janine: Yeah.
Ali: So for Shooting the Moon specifically, there’s like, one where you can use the same basic mechanics but you can be like, on a cliff trying to beat the snow, like, hiking and stuff.
Jack: Oh, wow!
Ali: The first one where it’s like, hey, let’s sit down and play these two people going on dates, and see if they like each other. There’s like a reverse of that, where you can be like, well let’s just play it like Mr and Mrs Smith, where it’s like these two people in love, how are we destroying their relationship?
Jack: [laughing] Cool.
Ali: So there’s… yeah. All of these games are super hackable and also have really good suggestions for how to hack them in the book. So, I definitely recommend it, if you think this is cool, and you think that it sounds neat. I definitely did. I think we had a really good time with it. [laughs]
Jack: Yeah, this has been one of my favourite things that we’ve done in ages.
Ali: [laughing] Good. I don’t know when we’re gonna be back with this, we have a bunch of Patreon stuff that we’re doing—Oh! I’m going to—I was going to do the thing I wanted to do, which is go to libsyn.com and post tonight’s Hieron episode live on air. [laughs]
Jack: Oh, wow!
Ali: So also, you’ve just had this amazing experience, and now you can go listen to some more of the show, congratulations! And I’m gonna do it the right way this time, it’s not gonna be a little baby file that’s only two minutes like it was last time. [Janine laughs]
Jack: Is this us arriving in the place, Ali?
Ali: It sure is~!
Jack: Wowee! Wowee, a brand new place [Ali laughs] for listeners in Hieron.
Ali: I love this episode. Libsyn’s gonna take a little bit to publish that, but you are gonna find that in a second… You can find that at friendsatthetable.net, you can find me over at ali_west on Twitter dot com, and you can find Friends at the Table over at friends_table on… Twitter dot com [laughs] I was about to plug the website again, which I did not need to do, [Janine laughs] it’s friends_table on Twitter dot com. I’ve been joined by Jack de Quidt.
Jack: Hi! I’m Jack, you can find me on Twitter at notquitereal, and buy any of the music featured on the show at notquitereal.bandcamp.com except music that has appeared on live episodes, such as the… the Marielda theme from the live episodes, the Fall of Magic stuff, the Lasers and Feelings stuff, and the various cues we use elsewhere. That will be online at… some point? That’s part of the plan, but not quite yet.
Ali: Yeah, that’s coming super soon. That’s coming super super soon. And then I was also joined by Janine Hawkins.
Janine: I’m Janine Hawkins, you can find me @bleatingheart on Twitter.
Ali: Okay, perfect. If you—you already know about this if you’re listening to this, probably, but we’re also over at friendsatthetable.cash where you can give us some bucks for all the entertainment that we give you! I thought this was great, and I think that it’s worth five dollars, and I hope that you do too.
Jack/Janine: Yeah.
Ali: If you’re listening to this with a friend, you can go support us there, you can see episode two over there. And please do that, and thank you, and goodnight!
Janine: Wait! Clapping.
Ali: Oh, fuck— [laughs]
[Jack laughs]
Janine: Ali!
Jack: Ali! Did you end the recording?
Janine: We gotta do the thing! That’s the only reason people are still here, we gotta do the clap. [laughs]
Ali: [has been laughing throughout, recovers] I also typed clap.is again. [starts laughing again]
Janine: We need to just register that or something.
Jack: And just route it to the time.is. Ah, should we do—
Ali: Ten seconds?
Jack: Yeah, ten.
Janine: Yeah.
[claps]
Ali: That seemed fine.
Jack: Yeah.
Janine: I have no complaints.
Ali: I heard mine and nobody else, yeah.
Jack: Okay.
Ali: Night everyone!
Janine: Goodnight.
Jack: Have a great night, everybody, we will see you soon!
Ali: Bye!
Janine: Bye!
[Recording ends]
[1] t/n: assuming you’ve read all the notes from Pt 1 but if not: Jack is coughing throughout the audio but I predominantly don’t reference it. Transcription and time stamps reference the Patreon audio and not the YouTube stream itself!
[2] YouTube stream: 02;13;34. Jack accidentally creates a box around the point marker instead of filling it in, creates a second box over it, and then struggles to clear them both to use the paint tool instead.
[3] Ace Attorney.