Tuesday 9th 2016.
Having a swim with my cousins.
On a hot Sunday me and my family went to our swimming hole.When we got to the swimming hole my old cousin jumped off the bake. And he dun a big as bom and. Then I dun a bom it went big to. After that me and my family went to our toan hol and when we got there a big as toan. Then me and my family went back up to the house to smoke the toan and after the toan was smoked me and my family were going for a swim again. Then me and my hall family had a swim.
Element | Why did you give the score? | |
Ideas | 3 | I added details about what I was doing. |
Structure and Language | 3 | I used time words and interesting words. |
Organisation | 3 | My ideas are in order. |
Sentences | 3 | My sentences make sense. |
Vocabulary | 2 | I only use everyday words not interesting words. |
Punctuation | 2 | I am beginning to use full stops and capital letters correctly. |
Spelling | 3 | I can spell some words words correctly. |
Total | 19 | 2b |
List something that you think you did well in this text. |
I added details. |
What do you need to work on to improve your writing? |
I need to use interesting words and full stops and capital letters correctly . |