A GUIDE TO BEING DECENT
Towards others and yourself.
What for? Because some of you just need to educate yourselves, become an ally towards human rights movements, or you want to learn how to better yourselves. I’m not telling or forcing these ideas onto you, but if you really took the time to learn and think about them, maybe, just maybe, you won’t have the need to say “why” every time. Plus you get to self improve, and ngl, that’s a glow up.
Want to correct me? Please just text me (@kqtheryen) and explain why I’m wrong so I can educate myself as well. However, I do have the choice to not listen to you if what you say steps on the rights of others.
Want to add more? Text me (@kqtheryen) a post or an article or whatever. I’m not letting people edit because there are people who think whatever they think is right when that might not be the case.
Want to debate or learn more? Again, text me (@kqtheryen). But once you get into a “you’re wrong” mentality, I’m leaving and that doesn’t mean you win.
There is more to be added obviously, but it will expand from time to time.
Thanks, xoxo.
Gender Issues
- What is toxic masculinity?
- What is toxic femininity?
- How to use they/them pronouns
- Sex vs Gender; Info on the genders of today
- A simple guide to all pronouns
- Patriarchy harms everyone
- Teach boys about how to stay away from toxic masculinity
- How to fix your mistakes when using pronouns
- Things that women don't have to be okay with
- What non-binary people want you to know
- Clothes don’t have gender labels
- Wear whatever you want- don’t let masculinity or femininity define what you can wear
- Ok, so you still want to wear ”boy” clothes because you’re a boy- THEN WEAR “BOY” CLOTHES JUST DON’T CATEGORIZE SKIRTS OR WHATEVER AS ONLY FOR GIRLS (the same goes for the girls who think the latter)
- https://www.instagram.com/p/CFCkE14nTvj/?igshid=10uli8rvrdsa1
- How to be a better enby ally
Racial Problems
- Things to not say to a black or brown women
- Sexualization of BIPOC in the media
- Similar to blackface, yellowface is changing your appearance to look more asian
- Idk why some of you guys don’t think this is real but I’ve seen some of you guys pull your eyes back with tape to get a “fox-eye” look, but all you’re doing is being racist :(
- https://www.instagram.com/p/CDZzGVDDq8T/?igshid=1q54wtrko2au4
- Normalize black people’s hair
- Reverse racism isn’t real
- Reverse racism is basically the denial of white privilege
- HOWEVER, mistreating white people who have done or said nothing wrong is discrimination and racial prejudice
- JUST BECAUSE THEY HAVE PRIVILEGE IN MOST ASPECTS, DOESN’T MEAN THEY SHOULD BE DENIED THE RIGHT TO HAVE HUMAN RIGHTS TOO
- White people have to understand that their privilege comes from a RACIST SYSTEM that only benefits them, which is why reverse racism isn’t real
- https://www.instagram.com/p/CDHAsktnEGV/?igshid=5ka51pkm3g4o
- POC do not have victim complexes
- Internalized racism in the Asian-American community
- This follows the model minority myth which is a MYTH
- It shows how white supremacy has groomed us to which POC believe that we have privilege like white people, and that white people look at us like POC
- That’s normalized racism against Asians
- https://www.instagram.com/p/CFQiznfj_4j/
Sexuality
- What sexuality phobias sound like
- Homophobic actions that are normalized
- It’s not cute :(
- You’re just trying to find a way to excuse yourself from being homophobic but it’s not working
How to be an active activist, or at least an ally
- “I don’t see color,” what’s wrong with that?
- Practice genuine, not performative allyship
- How you can use white privilege to promote blm
- How to correct someone/react to correction when something offensive was said or done
- Why you might be the issue by doing nothing
- Common slurs and why you can’t use them
- Dark humor is when you joke about your own issues, which makes it valid to a point (it’s not always okay, and it can degrade your situation)
- It should not be about others, AND IT DEFINITELY SHOULD NOT BE USED TO EXCUSE YOURSELF OR OTHERS
- https://www.instagram.com/p/CFfzj7NhdNO/
- So you want to give to the homeless
Changing the system
- ICE released many, many children- isn’t that good?
- Alternatives to calling the police
- 20 things you can do to support BLM
- Why blue lives don’t exist
Mental/developmental disorders & their issues
- People with eating disorders don’t want to hear:
- A little bit of info on autism
- OCD is horribly represented in the media
- People are self diagnosing themselves when they don’t actually have it
- This makes OCD look less like a mental disorder, and brushes off those who are actually traumatized because of it
- https://www.instagram.com/p/CFKmMdnhl1W/
- There is no “worst” mental illness
- Stop telling people that they’re fine when you think a specific mental illness is more extreme than the other
- It’s not, and you don’t realize how hard it is to put up with any mental illness
- https://www.instagram.com/p/CFWCsonj655/
- What minimizing looks like
- Childhood trauma & how it has shown up in my adult life
Depression (I believe this will help people understand why this mental illness is very scary during COVID)
- What to remember when you love someone with depression
- 15 reasons why people self harm
- How suicide affects loved ones
- 10 subtle ways a suicidal person is asking for help
- Signs that your loved one is struggling
Getting help
Rape Culture
- Teaching consent to children
- What it means when you suggest that women should only get abortion when rape or incest occurs
- How boys can help fight rape culture
- Pro-choice doesn’t mean pro-abortion
- If you say you’re pro-life, you’re probably pro-birth
- Pro-birth obstructs pro-choice
- Pro-life is when you care for all lives, not just a fetus
- Usually, these people will argue that a fetus deserves a better life but what about orphans and POC?
- https://www.instagram.com/p/CFrqJJAgH07/
- I’ll add more when I find it, because I know that a sign only does so much on educating
How to better yourself in your own aspect
- Everyone is capable of being toxic
- What is toxic positivity?
- So you want to talk about self-care
- Are you emotionally mature?
- Guide for dealing with a toxic family
- How to be a better listener
- Gentle reminders for the procrastinators
- What you don’t know about sensitive people
- Signs that you are doing better than you think you are
Healthy Relationships
- What a healthy relationship should look like
- Stop ignoring all the red flags and start learning what should be actively present in your relationship
- Obviously, this will make your relationship a lot less toxic and more loving
- https://www.instagram.com/p/CFSTSuFo1YZ/
- When you date the wrong person
- Dating the wrong person can mentally destroy you (and sometimes physically)
- Some of you need to understand that some can’t leave their toxic s/o because they’ve been groomed from the start of their relationship that they need them
- It’s overwhelming and terrifying to leave someone who has manipulated us into a different kind of “love”
- https://www.instagram.com/p/CFp423XBjZ0/
- What depression looks like in a relationship