What do experts know?

It is 2am and my son has just woken from wetting himself.  He doesn’t do this every night, but lately, when he does, he has a very hard time falling back to sleep.  My husband took him to the doctor on Wednesday for his 15 month check-up, and he asked our pediatrician about Brock not falling back to sleep after we change his diaper and our pediatrician said that we needed to change and comfort Brock and rock him until he was soothed and sleeping, and lay him back down.

In theory, right?

Logically, I can see the validity in this concept.  I have read the parent forums on-line, bought Dr. Mindell’s Sleeping through the Night, Parents magazine....I see what the experts are saying, but when my child is screaming and crying for over 20 minutes now, I laid in bed thinking...what do these people know?

At first, I began to think if we let him cry, I won’t be able to get any rest.  But, it has moved beyond that now.  Now I am mad...mad because I wasn’t there to talk to the doctor myself, mad that I “can’t” go in to Brock’s room and comfort him, mad because my husband is telling me to be strong, mad because he might be right and that this is what we need to do to teach him.

What does he know?

I am mad at my husband.  Maybe because he can lay in bed and let Brock cry.  Maybe because I felt like I am being ganged up on by our pediatrician and my husband, like some tag team duo, with my emotions as a mom at stake.  Maybe I am mad because he CAN lay there and I CAN’T and I have tears welling up in my eyes because I want to help Brock and I want to be stronger and I can’t be...so I had to get up and leave our room, and the first thing I thought of was to write.

2:44am

After having moved as far from Brock’s room as possible, I begin to hear silence from his room.  Forty-four minutes after he first woke up with a wet diaper, he now is quiet.  While I try to resist the temptation to open the door and check him, I am still mad...mad because I feel like I had to let my little guy suffer and mad because I know that as soon as I walk back into our bedroom, my husband will be asleep, breathing heavily in a peaceful slumber.   Were they right?  I don’t know...perhaps from a researched base approach, but certainly not from a mom’s.  Many will say, a mother knows best, but tonight this mom was overruled.  Were they right?  My little one is asleep; so yes, I suppose they were.  Why then do I still feel mad?  I think most mom’s would agree....

What do experts know?