What’s Your Status? Session 1
If this is your first group gathering, take some time to introduce yourselves, including how you found your way into this group. If your group has met before, share a status update on something that has happened since the last time your group met.
Social networking is not a new concept, but the tools we use for it are rapidly changing. Where are you on the social networking spectrum? Are you a Facebook junkie and texting addict or are you a hand shake and business card person? Share how you make connections and build relationships with your social network.
If you have a great Facebook story of reconnecting with someone you haven’t seen in a long time, share that with the group.
Watch DVD Session 1
Some people regularly evaluate their lives to consider their status and others simply coast from day to day. Which are you more prone to do? Why? If you are a coaster, what moments in your life have forced you to take a life status update?
Even if you aren’t on Facebook you probably get asked for a status update several times a day. “How are you?” is a common greeting. Normally we ignore the opportunity to update the other person on our status by simply answering, “Fine.” What would happen if we gave a real status update every time we heard that question? Why do we avoid that possibility?
Giving a status update on Facebook allows users to tell the whole world what they are up to and how they feel about it. If you had to summarize the status of your life in ten words, could you do it? Try sharing a ten word update with your group.
As a teacher Jesus taught in many ways: directly confronting leaders; asking and answering questions; dramatic acts of resistance and healing. But he was most known for teaching in parables, stories designed to create a crisis of response. Parables are not designed to explain but rather to provoke thought, reflection and response. The Parable of the soils is a perfect example of this kind of teaching.
Read Mark 4:1-20
Without Jesus’ explanation, what kind of response might this parable generate? What kinds of curiosity would be created?
Jesus’ statements about his teaching being ignored (v. 11,12) can be quite troubling. If you are curious, read the context of his quote from Isaiah 6 in which God anticipates two periods of Isaiah’s ministry: a time when his teaching is ignored, followed by a time when he is trusted and received. Jesus seems to be making the same prediction about his own teaching.
Those who stay for the fuller teaching hear an explanation of this parable. What kind of response should come from this fuller explanation? How does this parable call for a status update? Do you see yourself in any of these soil types?
One of the heroes of the early church was the writer, missionary and church planter Paul. After his conversion he risked his life countless times to share the good news about Christ’s resurrection throughout the Roman Empire. When he writes this letter he is already a seasoned follower of Christ and he is writing a mature church filled with seasoned followers. We might expect him to invite them to rest, relax, and celebrate how far they have come. As you will see, his advice is completely different.
Read Philippians 3:1-16
Paul had accomplished much in his life. In the context of the Jewish culture he was a star. How do those accomplishments figure into his current status report? How would you summarize Paul’s current status report?
When are you tempted to rest on your laurels, and define your status by what you have accomplished and where you have been? What does Paul’s example teach us about defining our status by the past?
Paul seems to conclude that the most important part of our status is where we are headed and how we are pursuing Christ. In an ironic conclusion, he suggests that one of the marks of maturity is the recognition that we have not already arrived. What would your status report look like if you limited it to where your life is going?
We are easily distracted from our true status. We let our lives become the sum of the trivialities, so busy just getting by that we never think about where we are going. What aspects of your life distract you from taking a real status report?
Paul reminds us that all of our past and all of our accomplishments matter less than an honest look at where we are going. He concludes, “I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.” This week find time to ask yourself where you are headed.
It takes time to take a status report. Find a quiet place this week and get serious with yourself and with God. In these fives areas try to honestly assess, “Where am I? Where am I heading?” You may also want to ask, “Where do I wish I was heading?”
My relationships
My physical body
My occupation
My mission
My spiritual life
Who’s on Your Friend List? Session 2
Share how you did with last week’s challenge. What did you learn from your status report?
All of us can remember true friends. Who has showed you true friendship? How did that friend express his / her friendship? How did it make a difference in your life?
On the flip side, we may also have known someone we expected to be reliable but instead let us down. Though these events can leave deep scars, if someone in the group would like to share, sometimes talking about hurt can help.
Watch DVD Session 2
Are you someone who collects acquaintances or cultivates friendships? Why do you think this is? How is this pattern expressed in your relationships?
Kristal told a story from the Bible about four friends who brought their sick friend to Jesus. This is obviously a pretty literal expression of the principle from Paul’s letter to the Galatians. He commands the church to “Carry each other’s burdens.” (Galatians 6:2) What are some of the other defining differences between those you consider acquaintances and those that are deep friends?
Based upon your experience of or impressions of the church, is it a place that is characterized by true friendship or by superficial pleasantries shared by acquaintances?
The night before Jesus died, he walked with his disciples from the upper room where they had eaten their last meal together to the garden where he prayed to God about the suffering that he was going to endure. Along the way he had some of the most intimate conversations he would ever have with his disciples. Some of these are recorded in the gospel of John. As you read the following section, look for the connections and interplay between God’s love for Jesus, Jesus’ love for us, and our love for each other.
Read John 15:9-17
In this section, Jesus emphasizes the same key teaching so much that it might feel repetitive. How would you summarize the text?
Jesus calls on his followers to obey his commands. What does Jesus command in this text? If this is what it means to follow Jesus, can a person follow Jesus while isolated from other people or are relationships a necessary part of following Jesus?
Jesus offers a daunting definition of true friendship: “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” Perhaps the disciples would have heard this as an exaggeration in the midst of a demanding week, but in only a day Jesus would be dead for their sake. If you are a follower of Jesus, how do you respond to Jesus’ example and his teaching on Christian friendship?
Late in his ministry, the early church leader and travelling preacher, Paul wrote a letter to the church in Ephesus to be shared with many other churches, giving them the core of his teaching and thought. He covered many important issues in this short letter, one of which is the importance of true Christian friendship and Christian community.
Read Ephesians 4:1-32
According to Paul, what is the foundation of Christian unity and community?
Paul sees a relationship between the different skills and gifts that God gives to Christian individuals and the life of the church. According to Paul, for whom has God given the various gifts? (For a second opinion on this, check out 1 Corinthians 12:7)
Paul also teaches that the unity of Christian community is reality created by God, but he goes on to write that living out this unity takes work. In verse 25 he teaches that we “are members of one body.” Because of this, Paul writes we must, “speak truthfully to our neighbor.” Look back through this letter at all the instructions about how we relate to “one another.” How do these behaviors cultivate the unity that God gives and wants for the church?
The first practical step toward true friendship and Christian community is very basic. Jesus teaches us what so many other teachers have taught, “Do to others as you would have them do to you.” (Luke 6:31)
Write down a few of the top needs and desires you have from a deep friendship. After you do so, share your top ideas with the group. Feel free to add the good ideas the other people have to fill out your list.
This week, we need to improve our friends list in two ways. We need to add more friends, and we need to deepen our friendships. First, pick one person that you need to befriend. You are not just sending a “friend request”, but intentionally investing in someone’s life. Second, choose a friendship that you need to deepen. Do not pick randomly. Choose a friendship that will help both of you better follow Christ. Use the friendship qualities list you wrote earlier and plan to be a friend in the same ways you hope others would be a friend to you.
Have You Updated Your Profile? Session 3
As your group is gathering, give everyone a chance to share their progress on the friendship challenge from last week.
If you were making an online profile of yourself, what activities and characteristics would you highlight? What would you downplay?
How is the profile you would write for yourself different from the one your friends or co-workers or family might write?
As you think about the kind of person you want to be, who in your life has modeled the profile you want?
Watch DVD Session 3
Whether it was for a resumé or an online social network, all of us have had to decide how to present ourselves. Is that a tough process for you or an easy one? Do you put your best foot forward or lead with your faults?
If you gathered a committee to write your profile – people who know you well but from different aspects of your life – what would they say about you? Would they all see the same person? How would they disagree? Do you think they would see you as a humble servant or a grasping would-be tyrant?
Jesus’ profile was not what people expected. Those who expected God to send a Savior expected a Lord who would rule and not a king who would serve. According to the glimpses of the profile Betsy shared, how did Jesus intentionally confound those expectations? What was his profile?
The gospel of John records the scene as Jesus and his disciples gathered for their last meal together. This is one of the last opportunities Jesus has to explain his ministry and purpose to his disciples. Later that evening he will have long talks and intimate conversations, but he begins with an act of startling power.
Read John 13:1-17
Consider verses 3 and 4. They are perhaps the most surprising sentences in Scripture. He knew he had all power … so he washed feet. What is this text teaching about the connection between power and service? How does this contrast with what our world teaches about the relationship between power and serving?
Peter tried to refuse Jesus’ act of service. Notice how he addressed Jesus in verse 6. Why does it make sense for Peter to refuse to let Jesus wash his feet? What does Jesus say are the consequences if we refuse to let Jesus serve us?
After serving them, Jesus taught the disciples about the implications of his service. What are these implications? What should Christians do with the power they have? If the watching world were writing the profile of the church, would it conclude that we have used our power to serve and love others or to serve ourselves and lord over others?
The letter Paul wrote to the Philippian church was mostly encouraging and warm. But there was one important issue he confronted. Disagreements were beginning to threaten the unity of this wonderful church. Paul addressed this issue directly at the end of the letter. He even named names. But before he gave specifics he reminded them of the foundation for the mutual service expected of Christians.
Read Philippians 2:1-11
What is the relationship between our attitude toward each other and Christ’s attitude toward us?
The book of James instructs those who follow Christ to “Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up.” How do we see this modeled in the hymn about Christ in verses 6-11?
Consider again the specific advice of verses 3 and 4. Have you ever been part of a community with these attitudes? What was it like? Even if you have not been in a community like this, have you had one person who treated you with these Christ-like attitudes? Describe that relationship. In contrast, what happens to our relationships when we don’t have these attitudes?
This text is a call to update your profile to match Christ’s profile. If you thought with the mind of Christ, how would your specific behaviors in serving and relationships change?
We can answer God’s call to service because God has empowered all those who are in Christ with gifts for service to the church and the world. Consider the challenge of 1 Peter 4:7-11.
“The end of all things is near. Therefore be alert and of sober mind so that you may pray. Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. If you speak, you should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If you serve, you should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To Him be the glory and the power for ever and ever.” Amen.
Peter is very clear and practical. “Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others.” He isn’t talking about what to do with your Christmas presents. He is talking about the skills, abilities, and strengths God has given you. Make a list of the gifts God has given you that could become gifts to serve others.
With the help of your group, use your list to craft a specific plan that would “use whatever gift you have received to serve others.”
Is Facebook Really Free? Session 4
This week, we are talking about giving and generosity in every aspect of our lives, including our money. That can be a pretty hard topic. If anyone has a story to share, help break the ice by telling about one of your most awkward money conversations.
Why is it so hard to talk about money? What does this difficulty tell us about ourselves and about the role of money in our society and our lives?
Do you think of yourself as rich? Why or why not? Do you think that others would view you that way?
Watch DVD Session 4
Have you ever been tricked into spending more than you wanted by a seemingly free offer? What worked about the marketer’s strategy? Or has the opposite happened - you rejected a seemingly free offer because you were worried about the strings attached?
When have you experienced true no-strings-attached generosity? When have you shown true no-strings-attached generosity to others?
How do you balance spontaneous giving and strategic giving? Which comes easier for you? Why?
Paul’s first letter to Timothy was written late in Paul’s ministry and early in Timothy’s. It is a letter filled with encouragement, practical advice and passionate exhortation. Paul is sending Timothy on a mission. Near the end of this letter, Paul gives his final charge to Timothy and this charge is sandwiched in the middle of some advice about money.
Read 1 Timothy 6:6-19
What is Paul’s warning to Timothy regarding money? (9-10) Is this warning consistent with your experience and observation? Has the love of money been a snare in your life?
What is the connection between the warning against the love of money and the central charge of this text found in verses 11-16? Can the pursuit of material things and the pursuit of eternal things coexist in a person’s life? Why or why not?
Paul follows his final charge with some very practical advice about what Timothy should say to rich people. When you read that advice, do you quickly think of other people who need to hear that advice? If they took that advice seriously what good could they do in the world? Now consider your own riches, because someone else probably considers you rich. What might the person who thinks you are rich advise you to do with your riches? Be specific.
The book of Acts is a selective history of the early church. It doesn’t tell us everything we would want to know, but it does highlight some of the most important moments of the early church. One implication of this highly selective writing style is that if any story makes it in to the book, we should be careful not to miss it. We should always ask, “What can we learn from the example of these earliest Christians?” The eleventh chapter of Acts records the founding of the church in Antioch. At the end of this chapter we find a brief story about the generosity of this young church.
Read Acts 11:27-30
The fact that this story is included in this highly selective history means that the author must think it is a very important indicator of the early church. Acts records several examples of the church responding to the material needs of the community. Does the church today (both locally and world-wide) have a reputation for this kind of strategic intervention in the face of a crisis?
Is strategic generosity in response to a big global need easier for you, or are you more ready to respond to more spontaneous and local concerns? As you look at your life, what actually motivates you to live generously with your time, skills and money?
Often people are eager to live generously but fail to translate that desire into action. You may feel such a conviction now or perhaps you have for a long time felt that you should be more generous with the blessings in your life. You may wish you were more generous but realize that you are stuck in a pattern of using all your resources for your own good rather than using them to bless others as God has blessed you.
When we want to be generous but still fail, it is usually because of a gap in one or more of these three areas: our connection to the need, our trust in God, and the presence of a strategy.
• We are most ready to give when we feel a connection to the need. We see this modeled in the first days of the church. Giving happened spontaneously as people became aware of a need, not in response to a fund-raising campaign. See Acts 2:42-47 and Luke 10:30-35.
• We are most ready to give when we trust God to provide for us. Even if we want to help and know of a need, if we are afraid for our own security we will find it hard to be genuinely generous. Jesus challenged his disciples to not worry about themselves and to trust that God would care for them. See Matthew 6:19-34.
• We are most ready to give when we make a strategy. This has always been the case and was the case in the first century church. When confronted with the need of the Greek widows, the early church leaders did not just hope for sympathy among those who knew of the need, they gathered the people and devised a strategy for meeting the need. See Acts 6:1-7.
When any of these are missing, generous intentions rarely translate into a generous life. This week’s action challenge is to face these obstacles. Where is the gap that prevents your desires from becoming a lifestyle? Are you insulated from those in need? Are you consumed with worry unable to trust God for your security? Are you simply failing to make a plan for systematic generosity?
Discuss with your group which one of these areas is your biggest obstacle to generosity.
Based upon your conversation how might you close the gap in one of these areas? Use this space to brainstorm a plan.
Are You Finding New Friends? Session 5
As you look back on this series – the messages, the daily readings and the studies – what is a new idea you’ve learned or a new understanding you’ve gained? What is one new question you have?
This week we are talking about making new friends. Who was the last new friend you made? How did you meet and how did the friendship grow?
Some people make new friends easily and others are wary of new relationships. Which are you? Why might that be?
Watch DVD Session 5
Viral marketing is all the rage today. This term describes targeting a product to certain groups of people who will become so enthusiastic that they promote it as fans not as paid advertisers. Have you ever become such an enthusiastic fan of something that you voluntarily promoted it? Tell your group why you became a fan.
Not surprisingly, social networking spreads through social networks. Luke described the events of the church as “venues for relationships.” Of course most activities in life are “venues for relationships.” What are your relationship venues? How could you use those to invite someone to learn more about Jesus?
Luke suggested that the power of a friendship-based invitation can both grow the church and shrink the church. Have you seen these phenomena in action? Do you experience mostly the big side of church or the small side?
You already heard Luke talk about this powerful story from the fourth chapter of John. This is the second in a series of three deeply personal encounters found in the third and fourth chapters of John. There was a bitter distrust between Jews and Samaritans because traditional Jews considered Samaritans ritually unclean. Additionally, by talking with this woman Jesus is rejecting the cultural judgment that demeaned women. From beginning to end this encounter is about reaching out.
Read John 4:1-30 & 39-42
As this woman saw Jesus at the well, how might she expect Jesus to treat her? How does Jesus’ initial encounter with the woman challenge her expectations? How important is humility in the development of friendships?
This incident followed Jesus’ encounter with an important Jewish leader, Nicodemus. They met under the cover of night, and unlike the Samaritan woman, Nicodemus’ response was reserved and non-committal. John wants us to see this contrast. Do you relate more to Nicodemus’ caution or to the woman’s enthusiasm?
Notice that the woman offers the townspeople an introduction rather than an argument. How are these different? When you talk about faith and about Jesus, are you more prone to introduction or argument? Why? Keep thinking about this question as you consider the role of reconciliation that Paul discusses in the next text.
In many ways, the church in Corinth was deeply troubled. Like the church today they had plenty of baggage, plenty of disunity and plenty of confusion. But also like the church today they had the power of Christ’s mercy and they had a mission. The planter of the Corinthian church, Paul, wrote to them to remind them of their identity and mission in Christ.
Read 2 Cor 5:16 – 6:2
Paul acknowledges that before he came to believe that Jesus was the son of God, he thought Jesus was just a person. But now because he believes that Jesus was something more than just a person, he also believes that anyone who is in Jesus Christ is also more than the person he or she was before. What is Paul claiming about the identity of those in Christ? What does it mean that they are “reconciled”?
For those with this new identity, what is their new mission? In verse 20 Paul gives Christians a surprising title: God’s Ambassadors. What are some of the implications of this metaphor? Does the role of reconciler or ambassador offer a different picture of Christian evangelism than the typical picture our culture has of Christian evangelists? Does this challenge your understanding of how you live your daily life?
The gospel of John records two interesting details about how disciples came to Jesus. In two important cases the first invitation did not come from Jesus himself but from someone else. One of those early inviters was Peter’s brother Andrew.
“Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother, was one of the two who heard what John had said and who had followed Jesus. The first thing Andrew did was to find his brother Simon and tell him, “We have found the Messiah” (that is, the Christ). 42And he brought him to Jesus.” (John 1:40,41)
Andrew has heard about Jesus and the first thing he does is simply invite his brother to come hear as well. Wherever you are in the journey of following, you can invite someone to follow with you. Just like Facebook’s computer software is always suggesting new friends, you can suggest a new friendship to anyone you know. You don’t have to have it all figured out. You don’t have to be finished following. You just pick a friend and invite her or him to come with you to find out about Jesus, to walk with you as you follow together. Can you identify three people that you could invite to find out about Jesus with you?
Paul concludes the section you read earlier (2 Corinthians 6:1,2) with a direct appeal to those who are not yet in Christ. Knowing the glory of the reconciliation that God offers and the importance of the mission, he offers a direct challenge. “I tell you, now is the time of God’s favor, now is the day of salvation.” If you are not yet in the social network of God’s family, use this week to ask yourself, “why not?” Name the real obstacles that you have to trusting Christ. Write them down if it helps. Then commit to finding some way to address these obstacles: talk to a wise friend, read the Bible, ask questions. You may find that you are still unconvinced, but this invitation is too important to ignore. Paul’s words are still true, “Now is the day of salvation.” If you are ready to make that commitment and be reconciled with God, talk to someone today who can help you take that step.