Lori Berryman

 

Dr. Mahoney

 

ENG 502

 

11 November 2009

 

A Personal Study Plan: I’d Rather Be Blissfully Ignorant

 

           

FORETHOUGHT

           My metaphorical bucket-list never contained items like sky-diving over the Andes or spelunking in Mexican caves. Instead, I have one goal that I wish to accomplish before I leave this world - getting my doctoral degree in English.
          Writing up this study plan has proved to be quite difficult for me. I’ve never actually had to sit down and plot a course of action for my future. As of right now, I am enjoying myself immensely during all of the classes I’ve had at Kutztown and although I’m excited to one day graduate with my Master’s degree, there is still a part of me that wants to just stay and bask in the discussions about life, literature, and the great world of literary theory.

 

SCENARIOS

Best Case Scenario

The best case scenario would be if I graduated from Kutztown with my Master’s degree and a 4.0 GPA bolstered by an application that included conference papers and publications. Then, without much ado, I’ll be graciously accepted into a prestigious doctoral program where I can focus on American literature or the history of the English language.

In order to do this, I would have to quit my job (which bothers me because I like my job) and take some time off to focus on my goal. My soon-to-be husband would have to find a better paying job to offset the money I’d be spending to complete my education.  Unfortunately, I feel tremendously selfish to have to ask him to do that considering his job as a court reporter is going well and seems to be recession proof. Also, I know that he wants to go back to school, and if I would be taking away his own chances of doing so if I put him in that position. You can’t be so selfish in a relationship and still expect it to work.

Mid-ground Scenario

If the above scenario doesn’t work out, my next option is to of course graduate from Kutztown with my Master’s degree, 4.0 GPA, and yadda yadda. Then I’ll continue working at Oley Valley for a few years and finally make my way into a doctoral program. This way I can save my own money and there is no stress put on my soon-to-be husband. Then I also have time to really think about where my passions lie.

Unfortunately, if I wait a few years after I graduate from Kutztown (which I suppose will be around the 2011 range) I’ll be heading toward my 30s. As of right now, I plan on waiting until scientists develop a portable womb so both the man and woman can carry around the embryo. If this never comes to fruition, I’ll have to willingly accept my role as a child-bearing woman and take on the responsibilities of childbirth. I’m not even sure if we want a family, but it’s
something I certainly have to consider. Unfortunately, I’m not sure if it would be possible to wait that long to go back to school and still be able to juggle a family and another round of college.

Worst Case Scenario

The worst case scenario is if after graduating from Kutztown, I can’t get into doctoral program anywhere. Or even worse, I am forced to wait due to money issues, obligated to invest my ambitions into my family, and lose sight of what was once really important to me. Then I’ll become old and bitter, curse the public school system, and wake up on some idle Thursday wondering what happened to my life.

 

PROGRAMS OF INTEREST

I’m interested in PhD programs at University of Penn, Rutgers, and also Temple University. I haven’t done nearly enough research to assert which of these, if any, would be the best fit for me. On a very basic level, these schools are appealing to me because they aren’t terribly far from here. As of right now, The University of Penn is a long shot, considering they only accept about 12 people into the program a year. Rutgers is a little more forgiving in terms of acceptance and price. Temple has a program that focuses on psychology, philosophy, sociology and literature. I like the flexibility of that. In the next three years when a doctoral degree is actually a possibility, I may find that my interests are somewhere else entirely.

 

WHERE TO GO FROM HERE

            I’m unbelievably lucky to work at a school district that promotes further education for teachers. With that being said, I’m allowed the luxury to take my time and enjoy the classes that I choose to take here at Kutztown. I would, however, like to be finished with my degree by the spring of 2011. It all depends on what classes are offered in relation to my requirements. That’s actually the one part of the program that bothers me – it seems to be so top secret as to which classes are going to be offered during the upcoming semesters. Unfortunately, the current system leaves no time to game plan.

            When graduation rolls around, I’ll be looking to complete the capstone portfolio project option instead of the thesis. I like the idea of revisiting two of my papers and molding and reshaping them to illustrate how far I have come in this program. As of right now, I would like to use my paper from Dr. Vogel’s American Realism class entitled, Progress and Poverty in Garland’s Main-Travelled Roads and my paper from Dr. Forsyth’s class entitled, Is There a Path to Aesthetic Enlightenment: Applying Aesthetic Observations and Evaluations to A Clockwork Orange. This of course can change. These two papers just happen to be the ones I look forward most to revisiting. I enjoyed writing them the first time so I feel like I could tolerate reworking them again and again without hating the subject matter.

 

AFTERTHOUGHT

As I’ve said earlier, this personal study plan has not come easy for me. My whole life, I’ve known my ending goal, but it is truly difficult for me to nail down any one road I plan on taking there. There are so many external factors involved like family, money, work, etc. In some ways, I wish I would have just become a professional student after I graduated with my bachelor’s degree from Bloomsburg so then I wouldn’t have grown roots in this area and in this life. I think the biggest thing I’ll have to overcome in regards to pursuing my doctoral degree isn’t grades or desire – it’ll be the ability (or lack their of) to balance all aspects of my life that I can’t sacrifice for my own personal dreams.