SATAN’S LIES ABOUT SEXUAL STRUGGLES
Satan’s lie: “You’re the only one dealing with this problem. If anyone ever finds out, you’ll be shamed and rejected.”
Truth: Most men and even some women deal with this problem to some extent, so there will be more understanding and grace than I think.
Satan’s lie: “You failed again. You’ll never be able to train your eyes. It’s impossible.”
Truth: Though I have failed, God is able to redeem each failure as I turn to Him. He promises to make me more than a conqueror. Through Him all things are possible. I refuse to believe the lie that though I have not yet experienced consistent victory, I am doomed to failure. God is constantly at work in me and will provide what I need when I need it. All of His promises apply to me. (Romans 8:28, 37, Philippians 1:6, 2:13, 4:13, 4:19, I Cor. 10:13, Jude 24, II Peter 2:7-9, Galatians 6:9)
Satan’s lie: “As long as you failed, you might as well go ahead and indulge yourself.”
Truth: At every point of temptation, God provides a way out for me. (I Cor. 10:13) If I
indulge myself, I will feel even worse than I did before I started. If I indulge myself, I will still have the bad feeling that drew me to give into temptation in the first place. But I will also feel even more guilt and shame. (Galatians 6:7-8)
Satan’s lie: “God is losing patience with you. He is angry with you and sees you as a failure.”
Truth: My sins are forgiven and there is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus. Where sin abounds, grace abounds still more. (Romans 2:4, 5:20, 8:1, Ps. 103:8, Phil 1:6)
Satan’s Lie: It’s too late. You’re trapped and can’t get out.
Truth: If I choose to face and deal with the problem, God’s unlimited resources, power and promises are all available to me. God’s grace did not come just to pay my penalty for my sin. It also came to set me free from the power of sin. I can choose to no longer be a slave to sin, but a slave of righteousness. (Romans 6)
THE PATHWAY TO PURITY1
Confess your sins and claim God’s forgiveness
Humbly come before God each time you sin
Reject Satan’s lies that God will condemn you and will not forgive you
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” (I John 1:9)
Get rid yourself, your home and work of all sexually addictive items.
Throw away all pornography (magazines, pictures, images, movies, files)
Renounce all ties with the pornographic materials
Remove all porn website addresses and programs that enable you to download movies from your computer.
Install internet filters & accountability program on your computer and give a friend the password.
Free resources - Internet filter: K9 Web Protection and internet accountability program: X3Watch.com
“Wash and make yourselves clean. Take your evil deeds out of My sight! Stop doing wrong.” (Isaiah 1:16)
Share your struggles with a close friend or group of believers who can give you the support, grace and accountability that you need.
You are not alone in this struggle. There are people out there who understand and can reach out to you in love.
Confess your struggles (specific enough yet avoiding the lurid details) with them.
If your friends share with you their struggles, do not lecture them or condemn them. At this time, most probably they are at the point of despair. They do need to be held accountable for their sins, but they also need help, support, and unconditional love
Make a commitment to meet regularly and talk specifically about the progress and struggles.
Sms or call someone when the temptation is strong
Be willing to admit each time when you slip.
“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10)
Uphold boundary lines that must be off limits.
Resolve to not surf the internet alone in a private room with the screen facing away from the door or with the door close.
Resolve not to enter into stores that sell magazines, books or movies alone.
Write down no-no places, such as stores that sell porn materials.
Give the above information to your accountability partner.
“The prudent see danger and take refuge, but the simple keep going and suffer for it.” (Proverbs 27:12)
Claim the power of Christ daily when temptation overwhelms you.
“Lord, I’m relying on You to be my Redeemer.”
“Lord, I’m depending on You to be my Deliverer.”
“Lord, in my weakness I need Your strength.”
“I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.” (Philippians 4:13)
Take on positive habits of discipline, such as exercise, sports, regular sleep and new hobbies.
Choose to make a “to do” list of your needs and wants.
Choose to do one item from the list when you are tempted.
Choose to write a letter, call a friend, help someone in need.
“God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self discipline.” (2 Timothy 1:7)
Fill your mind to prayer and Scripture.
Dedicate your mind and body to God each day and pray for protection.
Meditate and memorize verses related to purity.
Make plans to spend time with God daily that includes prayer, and reading and meditating on the Bible)
“So put out of your life every evil thing and every kind of wrong. Then in gentleness accept God’s teaching that is planted in your hearts, which can save you.” (Jam 1:2 1)
“No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.” (1 Corinthians 10:13)
FREE ONLINE RESOURCES
Recovery courses (www.settingcaptivesfree.com)
Internet Filter (www1.k9webprotection.com/)
Accountability Program (http://x3watch.com/)
Porn-Free Help (www.porn-free.org/)
SAMPLE PRAYER AND BIBLE VERSES TO STAND AGAINST PORNOGRAPHY
Sample prayers:
For Self
Prayer against Temptation
The fleshly desires are part of our lives as believers, but they need not control us. Through prayer, we can apply biblical steps to freedom from fleshly desires.
“Lord Jesus Christ, my old fleshly nature is tempting me to see pornography, and I know that if it’s left to itself, it is wicked enough to cause me to sin against You. I affirm that through the work of Your cross I am dead with You to the rule and control of my flesh and its desire to ward pornography. Holy Spirit, I ask You now to replace this fleshly desires that is temping me toward pornography with the fruit of Your control. Put within my mind, will, and emotions Your love, joy, peace, patience, and all the virtues that my Lord Jesus Christ enables me to live out for His glory. Amen.”
Prayer of confession
“Dear Heavenly Father, You have told me to put on the Lord Jesus Christ and make no provision for the flesh in regard to its lust (Rom. 13:14). Lord, I confess that I have committed the sin of sexual immorality in my thought life through pornography. I thank You that in Christ my sins are already forgiven, but I have broken Your holy law and given the devil a chance to wage war in my body (Rom. 6:12, 13; Jas. 4: 1; l Pet. 5:8). I come to You now to confess and renounce these sins of the flesh (Prov. 28:13; 2 Cor 4:2) so that l might be cleansed and set free from the bondage of sin.
Lord, I renounce all these uses of my body as an instrument of unrighteousness through pornography in the name of Jesus. I cancel out all ground that evil spirits have gained through my willful involvement in sin. I choose now to present my eyes, mouth, mind, heart, hands, feet and sexual organs to You as instruments of righteousness. I present my whole body to You as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable, and l choose to reserve the sexual use of my body for marriage only (Heb. 13:4).
I reject the devil's lie that my body is not clean or that it is dirty or in any way unacceptable to You as a result of my past sexual experiences. Lord, thank You that You have totally cleansed and forgiven me and that You love and accept me just the way I am. Therefore, I choose now to accept myself and my body as clean in Your eyes. In the name of Jesus. Amen.”
For CG members
“Loving heavenly Father, I thank You for Your high and Holy purpose for human sexuality. Through my words, prayers and conduct, grant me the wisdom to convey to my disciples biblical values concerning their sexuality. In the name of my Lord Jesus Christ and by the power of His blood, I resist all strongholds of sexual perverseness assigned to manipulate and rule over _____ (name of member)’s sexuality. I specifically resist strongholds of ______. (Name and perverted sexual tendency observed in your disciples; pornography, masturbation, same-sex attraction, etc.). I command them to cease all activity against ________. They and their entire host must leave ________ and go where the Lord Jesus Christ sends them. Amen.”
Verses for meditation, memorization and prayer.
“God wants you to be holy and to stay away from sexual sins.” (I Thess 4:3 NCV )
“ So put all evil things out of your life: sexual sinning, doing evil, letting evil thoughts control you, wanting things that are evil, and greed. This is really serving a false god.” (Col 3:5 NCV)
“Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—His good, pleasing and perfect will.” (Romans 12:2 NIV)
“I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl.” (Job 31:1 NIV)
“No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.” (1 Cor 10:13 NIV)
“Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable, if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, think about such things.” (Philippians 4:8 NIV)
“Anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” (Matthew 5:28 NIV)
“For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life.” (I Thessalonians 4:7)
1 Adapted and modified from Biblical Counseling Keys by June Hunt